I found this book very informative about OCD and useful in
understanding my situation and ways to deal with it.
First, "obsessions" are basically things you worry about that cause
you anxiety. For example, that you forgot to lock the door so your
home will be robbed, or that you touch something unclean and will
either become sick yourself or make someone else you come into contact
with ill.
The "compulsion" are things you feel you must do to prevent the
"disaster" you are worried about from occurring. For door locking,
you will check the doors again and again until you are "sure" they
are locked. The emphasis on "sure" as these compulsions are an effort
to achieve certainty that the disaster won't occur. For germs, you
may wash your hands again and again until you feel "certain" they are
clean enough, or perhaps avoid touching things in the first place.
These cause problems as the obsessions are a distraction and cause
stress and anxiety, while the compulsions either prevent you from doing
things you should, cause you to do unnecessary things, or to do things more
times than needed. Both obsessions and compulsions can cause a lot of
wasted time.
People often have something specific in mind for OCD (incessant
washing, organizing, checking) but OCD comes in a variety of types
and strengths.
A key difference between a "regular" person and an OCD behavior is
when one stops a task, say washing one's hands. A regular person stops
washing after a reasonable amount of time and when their hands look
clean. An OCD person stops when it "feels right," when they feel that
it is enough. The problem is, the more one gives into the
compulsions, the less faith they have in it, and the stronger the
obsession gets.
The book recommended not giving into the compulsions in order to
reduce affect of obsessions, that giving in makes the OCD
stronger. One tactic is to only allow a "reasonable response." For
example, if you are not sure you locked the door, it is reasonable to
go and check once, but not more than once. I have found this to be
quite helpful.
An interesting point the book made about checking is that it is not
one's memory that is bad (why can't I remember if I already checked
the door or that I was paying attention), it is that you don't trust
your memory. I find focusing on having faith in my abilities helps.
The book also offers cognitive behavior methods for attacking the
obsessions. If you can reduce the worry and anxiety, it's easier to
ignore the compulsion.
An important aspect of dealing with OCD is the concept of certainty.
The compulsions are an attempt to make sure the obsession can't
happen. Obsessions tend to escalate in an effort to be more and more
sure. The book recommends embracing the concept that certainty is not
possible. If you are checking the door, checking once versus 12 times
really doesn't make a difference. Something could still fail. It's
alright to take reasonable care and go on and live your life.