Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

If You Can't Be Good

Rate this book
A leading newspaper columnist struggles to uncover the pressures that forced a wealthy senator to accept a bribe

272 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1973

3 people are currently reading
105 people want to read

About the author

Ross Thomas

59 books171 followers
Ross Thomas was an American writer of crime fiction. He is best known for his witty thrillers that expose the mechanisms of professional politics. He also wrote several novels under the pseudonym Oliver Bleeck about professional go-between Philip St. Ives.

Thomas served in the Philippines during World War II. He worked as a public relations specialist, reporter, union spokesman, and political strategist in the USA, Bonn (Germany), and Nigeria before becoming a writer.

His debut novel, The Cold War Swap, was written in only six weeks and won a 1967 Edgar Award for Best First Novel. Briarpatch earned the 1985 Edgar for Best Novel. In 2002 he was honored with the inaugural Gumshoe Lifetime Achievement Award, one of only two authors to earn the award after their death (the other was 87th Precinct author Evan Hunter in 2006).

He died of lung cancer two months before his 70th birthday.

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
66 (33%)
4 stars
86 (43%)
3 stars
42 (21%)
2 stars
4 (2%)
1 star
0 (0%)
Displaying 1 - 26 of 26 reviews
Profile Image for James Thane.
Author 10 books7,076 followers
October 14, 2022
Back in the day (the day being 1959), Deke Lucas was a doctoral student at the University of Colorado, writing a dissertation on an army captain named Bonneville from the Revolutionary War era, when Bobby Kennedy came through town campaigning for his brother, John F. Kennedy. Deke set his studies aside, joined the campaign, and after JFK was elected went to Washington and wound up with a career ferreting out corruption in government agencies.

Now more than ten years down the road, he's still trying to finish the dissertation in and around his other responsibilities when he gets a job offer from Frank Size, a nationally syndicated columnist who's based in Washington, D.C. Size is puzzled by the actions of a U.S. senator who appeared to be on the rise but who has suddenly self-destructed. The senator, Robert F. Ames of Indiana, has resigned after being caught apparently taking a $50,000 bribe to make a speech on the senate floor touting the virtues of a questionable corporate takeover. Additionally, Ames has left his very wealthy wife to take up with a stunningly sexy young woman who works for the lobbying firm that allegedly paid Ames the bribe.

Size hires Deke Lucas to dig into the story, using his investigative skills to figure out why Senator Ames has gone so far off the rails. Lucas accepts the job and shortly thereafter the senator's daughter is murdered in spectacular fashion, right in front of Lucas, as she is bringing him evidence that she claims will clear her father's name. Now Deke Lucas is in this mess up to his neck, which might well be on the line here, as a lot of sinister characters are determined to protect their own interests and their secrets along with them.

This is a witty, intelligent crime novel, and Deke Lucas is a very engaging protagonist. The plot is interesting and moves along at just the right pace. The supporting cast is also good and all in all, this is another very good novel from a writer who was among the best in the business during this era.
Profile Image for Nooilforpacifists.
995 reviews64 followers
November 21, 2015
THE best book Ross Thomas wrote. More on the conventional mystery side (like Briarpatch) then the screwball mystery parodies (like Missionary Stew, Thomas's second best). Yet, unlike Briarpatch but like Missionary Stew, "If It Can't Be Good" is thoroughly political--in Washington, at the Watergate even. The twists and turns are near impossible to keep track of, much less keep ahead of. Were Raymond Chandler writing in the 1970s, and in DC rather than LA, this would be the result.

After re-reading this masterpiece, I can guess it was deemed too misogynistic to be republished on Kindle. I think that view unfair (does anyone outside the Ivy League Faculty ask whether Chandler hated dames?). But do yourself a favor and snap up a used paperback copy to judge for yourself.
Profile Image for DunklesSchaf.
153 reviews6 followers
October 28, 2018
„Und wenn Du nicht brav sein kannst, dann sei wenigstens vorsichtig.“(S. 283)

Ich könnte mir manchmal selbst in den Hintern beißen. Ich weiß, dass die Krimis von Ross Thomas großartig sind. Jeder, den ich gelesen habe, hat mir großen Spaß gemacht hat und war immer äußerst spannend war. Und trotzdem schrecke ich manchmal davor zurück, zu einem weiteren Buch von ihm zu greifen. Denn Ross Thomas schreibt über Politik, über den Kalten Krieg und Spionage, über politische und wirtschaftliche Verflechtungen und Menschen, bei denen man manchmal nicht mehr weiß, für welche Seite sie arbeiten. Dabei gelingt es ihm doch immer wieder, dass man niemals verwirrt oder überfordert ist. Gekonnt leitet er einen durch die Verwirrungen und dröselt sie auf die spannendste Weise auf. Und dieser Trick gelingt ihm auch in seinem neuesten Streich. Nun ja, zumindest die neueste Veröffentlichung im Alexander Verlag, der sich nicht nur das Ziel gesteckt hat, alle Krimis des Autors neu zu veröffentlichen, sondern diese auch noch in äußerst schicke Cover packt.

Ja, auch im vorliegenden Titel geht es um Politik. Zumindest hintergründig, denn der Grund aller Vorkommnisse in dem Krimi ist ein Senator. Frank Size, ein Kolumnist, der mit der Macht seiner Worte Menschen vernichten kann, engagiert Decatur Lucas der herausfinden soll, warum Senator Robert Ames sich bestechen ließ. Eigentlich Ex-Senator Ames, denn sein Amt hat er dann auch noch gleich niedergelegt – gemeinsam mit seiner steinreichen Ehefrau – und lebt nun mit seiner jüngeren Geliebten, Connie Mizelle, in einem schicken Apartment. Deke Lucas, eigentlich Historiker und freier Berater im öffentlichen Dienst, lockt das feste Gehalt und die versprochene Arbeit zu Hause, so dass er Sizes Auftrag annimmt. Kurz darauf erhält er einen Anruf von Ames Tochter Carloyn, die ihm Informationen verspricht, die ihren Vater entlasten, doch kurz bevor es zu der Übergabe kommt, explodiert der Aktenkoffer mit den versprochenen Informationen und tötet Carolyn Ames.

Decatur Lucas ist nun nicht unbedingt die sympathischste Figur. Gut, kann man noch verstehen, dass er, als Carolyn Ames in die Luft fliegt, nicht eingreift – wozu auch? Er wäre eh nicht schnell genug bei ihr gewesen und hätte etwas verhindern können. Auch sein Privatleben ist für die Zeit doch eher ungewöhnlich, da er in wilder Ehe mit Frau und Kind (aber nicht seins) lebt, und er sich zwar durchaus hin und wieder durch Sex trösten lässt, wenn der Job nicht gut läuft, ansonsten aber eher keinen Bezug zu Kindererziehung hat, mal abgesehen von philosophischen Gedanken über den anhaltenden Krieg zwischen Kleinkind und Kater. Unbeteiligt kann man Deke Lucas zu Recht nennen, nichtsdestotrotz versteht er sich auf Recherche und zieht die richtigen Schlüsse. Als Historiker, der im politischen Dreck wühlt, sind dies nicht zu verachtende Eigenschaften. Und tatsächlich muss man ihn doch noch bewundern und den Hut ziehen, für die Entscheidung im letzten Kapitel, die ihn dann doch irgendwie noch ein wenig Sympathie verleiht. Und ganz ehrlich – wer will schon Mister Nice Guy als Privatdetektiv? So einer muss doch unbequem sein!

Meine anfänglichen Befürchtungen aufgrund politischer Verstrickungen irgendwann nicht mehr durchzublicken haben sich – wieder mal – als falsch rausgestellt. Ja, es geht um einen Senator, aber es gibt viel mehr Themen in seinem Leben, die von Deke beleuchtet werden, als nur sein politisches Wirken. Vor allem die Frauen, die der gute Senator um sich geschart hat, sind ein Thema für sich. Von Fast-Ex-Frau mit Millionen in der Hinterhand über verbitterte Sekretärin mit Alkoholproblem bis hin zur neuen Geliebten, die fast schon zu gut ist, um wahr zu sein. Ah, und nicht zu vergessen, der Schnüffler der Gegenseite. Ein gut bezahlter Detektivfürst, bei dem es schon allein interessant ist, warum er sich die Füße schmutzig macht und nicht einen seiner Lakaien los schickt. Ach, dem Figurenensemble konnte ich fürwahr etwas abgewinnen. Bis in die Nebenfiguren war hier Futter an den Charakteren, sie waren schön ausgearbeitet und bleiben auch in Erinnerung.

Für genügend Spannung ist denn auch gesorgt, denn nicht nur Ames Tochter kann die Informationen nicht mehr liefern, sondern noch andere versuchen ihr Glück, diese Deke zukommen zu lassen und scheitern durch den Verlust ihres Lebens. Nichtsdestotrotz kommt hier einfach jeder Liebhaber der Private Eyes, der Privatdetektiv-Krimis, auf seine Kosten. Deke Lucas zieht los und löchert jede Person, die mit Senator Ames in näherem Kontakt stand, fragt, zieht Schlüsse und probiert Thesen aus. Genau so, wie es ein guter Detektiv machen soll, ob nun studierter Historiker oder nicht. Seine Dissertation über Bonneville wird ja aber vielleicht doch noch irgendwann fertig… man weiß ja nie.

Fazit:
Ein wunderbar ausgearbeiteter Thriller mit einem kratzig-kalten Schnüffler und einem hervorragenden Figurenensemble, einigen Stunteinlagen und gelungenem Abschluss. Wie immer bei Ross Thomas – ein Lesegenuss.
Profile Image for Craig Pittman.
Author 11 books217 followers
July 26, 2019
Another fast-moving, deeply cynical thriller from Ross Thomas, this time with more than a few references to what was then the ongoing Watergate scandal. I burned right through it in a couple of days because I couldn't put it down -- but when I did, the questions started.

The set-up: A legendary columnist hires a professional dirt-digger to get the real story behind one of his recent scoops about a U.S. Senator taking a bribe, a scoop that led to the senator's resignation in disgrace. The columnist is convinced there was far more to it, because the senator's wife is very rich, and thus the senator didn't need a bribe.

The hired investigator, Decatur Lucas, is used to poking into government waste and scandals. But he soon finds he's dealing with something far deeper and more treacherous, because the exsenator has ditched both his wife and his longtime mistress to move in with the female lobbyist who allegedly gave him the bribe. And then as the ex-senator's daughter is on her way to meet him with evidence she says will clear him, something happens that takes this story down a far, far darker road. Toward the end he actually has to burgle the Watergate -- and uses the same Scotch tape trick that the Watergate burglars used (although unlike them, he doesn't get caught).

I enjoyed reading this book while I was reading it, but as soon as I finished I realized how many plot holes Thomas had just skipped over rather than resolving them. For instance, (mild spoiler here) there's an attempt on our narrator's life when he visits another city -- so why isn't he in any danger when he returns home to DC? So I guess I'd rank this as one of Thomas' lesser efforts, but still enjoyable.

953 reviews19 followers
February 1, 2026
Ross Thomas (1926-1995) was the master of Washington political shenanigans. He loved telling stories of Washington publicist, fixers, private detectives, influencers and the rest of the riff raff.

This 1973 story starts with Dectaur Lucas, a former congressional investigator, going to work for Frank Size, the newspaper columnist. Size specializes in uncovering political scandals. He is pretty closely modeled on Jack Anderson.

Size assigns Lukas to investigate Senator Robert Ames. Ames had resigned in disgrace after he was accused of taking a $50,000 bribe in exchange for giving a speech in Congress. The mystery is that Ames is very wealthy from his wife's fortune and the scandal doesn't make any sense. Size wants Lucas to dig into it.

Lucas starts digging around. He gets in touch with the Senator's daughter. She tells him that she has documents that will expose the truth. She is killed on her way to meet with him.

The story takes off from there. There are more dead bodies. There are all kinds of intrigue. Lucas meets up with a shady private investigator who is hired by the Senator's divorced wife. The Senator's daughter had a sleazy boyfriend who is hanging around.

Thomas knows the in bars and restaurants in Washington. The Senator is living at the Watergate Complex. There is a heavy insider vibe to the whole story.
Profile Image for Sam Reaves.
Author 24 books69 followers
May 25, 2021
One of the best from a favorite writer, re-read several times.
Ross Thomas wrote knowing, cynical, dry and very polished political thrillers from the late sixties through the early nineties. His economy of expression, pitch-perfect dialogue and inside dope on the malodorous U.S. political process are unsurpassed.
In this one from 1973, Decatur Lucas, an "investigative historian", is hired by Frank Size, a nationally syndicated scandal-sniffing columnist (no doubt based on Jack Anderson) to find out why Senator Robert Ames has self-destructed, resigning from the senate in the wake of a bribery accusation, then ditching his heiress wife and taking up with a hot young mistress. Size smells blackmail, and Lucas is told to go find the secret. Ames's daughter claims to have it, but as she is on her way to deliver the evidence to Lucas, she and the evidence go up in a fireball. Things only get more interesting from there.
It has all the Ross Thomas hallmarks: jaded cops, hustlers on the make, booze, guns and guilty secrets. Nobody ever nailed the seamy side of American political culture like Ross Thomas
Profile Image for Nigel.
Author 12 books70 followers
February 5, 2017
Ross Thomas protagonists tend to be cool, urbane, witty, well-read, and have voices to match. These cool, urbane voices can be a little at odds with the depravity they describe and the nastiness they encounter. If You Can't Be Good is a real box of horrors, but Deek Lewis is the usual jaded, cynical narrator trying to make sense of events, In this case working with a journalist to find out why a Senator wrecked his career in a befuddlingly wasteful and stupid manner. It's all about motivations and reasons, and what a squirming can of worms they are. Otherwise it's the usual twisting and turning of a Thomas thriller, snappy dialogue and insider's dirt on politics, espionage, policework and journalism. When corruption is a way of life it takes some doing to pull of something really twisted - and that's what you get here.
Profile Image for Araych.
239 reviews2 followers
May 28, 2024
It appears a US Senator has been blackmailed into resigning and a famous newspaper columnist hires Decatur Lucas to investigate. He finds a whole array of ugliness and murder. Ross Thomas couldn't write a boring book -- amazing characterizations with humor and fascinating plot movement. I read a lot of mysteries and I was actually stunned at one plot shift. Great thriller mystery -- 5 stars.
Profile Image for Gayle Turner.
344 reviews13 followers
February 6, 2019
Ross Thomas was a brilliant storyteller. I have loved every one of his novels. This one included. Memorable characters and a clever plot makes for sure fire entertainment. I marvel that his novels have not been turned into films.
131 reviews1 follower
August 7, 2022
This is this Thomas mode I like best, a laconic, world-weary gumshoe trudging around asking questions, much better than his other mode which is more like wiseass ad-man rigs election. Big thumbs up, I wish there were 50 novels out there just like this.
Profile Image for Jason.
224 reviews1 follower
November 29, 2023
Wish I could give it 3.5 starts instead of 4 because it is a captivating story written in the early 70s in Washington, D.C. and I enjoyed some of the characters but the plot gets quite twisted in a unique way.
Profile Image for Stuart.
Author 1 book22 followers
January 3, 2017
Ross Thomas at his near best. A truly insane and compelling mystery plot with all the hallmarks of an excellent Thomas novel--absurd names, absolute bastards, excellent dialogue and incredibly weird, endearing characters.

I'm assuming this one was written in a sober period, as the protagonist is more hopeful and the characters all drink about half what they do in his darker books.

An absolute ripper of a novel, I finished it in a single sitting and so can you.

572 reviews7 followers
November 6, 2023
I read this book for the first time over 35 years ago so in my advanced age, I really had no recollection of the plot. I've now reread the book and loved all the twists and turns and the plot and the humor. Ross Thomas was a master at keeping 3 or 4 balls in the air and then bringing it all home but maybe not in the way that you figured. Give him a try if you haven't already.
Profile Image for Sharron.
2,453 reviews
June 27, 2013
This title has a decidedly Raymond Chandler flavor to it, yet it also offers a cynical and well deserved portrayal of human nature in general and politicians in particular. While its references to certain places like la Nicoise may be dated (the restaurant disappeared decades ago), the characters in this story are, regrettably, timeless.
Profile Image for David.
Author 18 books112 followers
February 11, 2011
Another of Ross Thomas's peerless essays in world-weary cynicism. Okay, so human beings are bacteria in a petri dish. But what happens if I move this one here and that one there and then put this toxic little sucker between them . . . . ? I would have liked to have a Martini with Mr. Thomas.
Profile Image for Adi.
985 reviews
November 3, 2015
I enjoyed this book a lot. Even though halfway through the book I could make a fairly good guess what would happen in the end, some of the plot twists were so impossible to predict, that I just had to keep going until I uncovered all the secrets.
Profile Image for Steve.
27 reviews13 followers
November 28, 2024
Re-read this over the past couple of days when I borrowed it from my friend, Steve Y. Another fine example of why Ross Thomas was the best mystery writer of his class.
Profile Image for Keith Raffel.
Author 6 books49 followers
January 21, 2024
Has there been a better American crime fiction writer in the last 50 years than Ross Thomas?
583 reviews11 followers
January 14, 2016
This is not the great American novel. It is a top notch crime fiction novel.
Profile Image for Chazzle.
268 reviews18 followers
August 5, 2009
Fantastic!!!

I will most certainly read more Ross Thomas.
Profile Image for Adrienne.
94 reviews1 follower
July 1, 2011
What's not to love about Ross Thomas. A little dated but a great funny mystery.
Displaying 1 - 26 of 26 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.