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Stop Doing Sh*t You Don't Want to Do: A Straightforward Guide to Letting Go of Unresolved Trauma
Do you want to let go of what’s not working - and claim your authentic life?
“Dr. Bob’s book offers the practical tools to gain awareness of the ways we unconsciously remain trapped in cycles of trauma and dependency.”
— Dr. Nicole LePera, #1 NY Times Best-selling author of How to Do the Work and How to Meet Yourself
Trauma is running the show and most of us don’t think we have it. We label it “stuck”, “stress”, “depression”, and “anxiety.” The solutions are simple but not easy. Stop Doing Sh*t You Don’t Want to Do
1) The many forms of trauma - mild and severe,
2) The many ways we medicate our pain.
3) The importance of finding support.
4) How to do the deep inner work.
5) How to live with purpose.
6) How to live with passion.
Dr. Bob Beare’s book is a framework and a guide to emotional freedom. It provides powerful insights on how to go beyond therapy and create a meaningful and purposeful life — a reminder that, with support, we can transcend the patterns that keep us stuck!
Get this book if you are ready to let go of the crap, and live your most passionate and purposeful life.
“Dr. Bob’s book offers the practical tools to gain awareness of the ways we unconsciously remain trapped in cycles of trauma and dependency.”
— Dr. Nicole LePera, #1 NY Times Best-selling author of How to Do the Work and How to Meet Yourself
"This book is full of experience and learned wisdom. It's a guidebook to help us find the healing energy necessary to reclaim our imaginative soul."
— James Hollis, PhD, Bestselling author of Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life and The Middle Passage
"With insightful strategies and inspiring stories, Dr. Bob Beare's groundbreaking book will help you find your way back to wholeness and healing."
— Scott Allan, Bestselling author of Do the Hard Things First
“Dr. Bob’s book offers the practical tools to gain awareness of the ways we unconsciously remain trapped in cycles of trauma and dependency.”
— Dr. Nicole LePera, #1 NY Times Best-selling author of How to Do the Work and How to Meet Yourself
Trauma is running the show and most of us don’t think we have it. We label it “stuck”, “stress”, “depression”, and “anxiety.” The solutions are simple but not easy. Stop Doing Sh*t You Don’t Want to Do
1) The many forms of trauma - mild and severe,
2) The many ways we medicate our pain.
3) The importance of finding support.
4) How to do the deep inner work.
5) How to live with purpose.
6) How to live with passion.
Dr. Bob Beare’s book is a framework and a guide to emotional freedom. It provides powerful insights on how to go beyond therapy and create a meaningful and purposeful life — a reminder that, with support, we can transcend the patterns that keep us stuck!
Get this book if you are ready to let go of the crap, and live your most passionate and purposeful life.
“Dr. Bob’s book offers the practical tools to gain awareness of the ways we unconsciously remain trapped in cycles of trauma and dependency.”
— Dr. Nicole LePera, #1 NY Times Best-selling author of How to Do the Work and How to Meet Yourself
"This book is full of experience and learned wisdom. It's a guidebook to help us find the healing energy necessary to reclaim our imaginative soul."
— James Hollis, PhD, Bestselling author of Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life and The Middle Passage
"With insightful strategies and inspiring stories, Dr. Bob Beare's groundbreaking book will help you find your way back to wholeness and healing."
— Scott Allan, Bestselling author of Do the Hard Things First
109 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 6, 2023
41 people are currently reading
29 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
August 22, 2023
Go Through The Fire To Heal
There’s so much magic in Dr. Beare’s book. The work book questions after every chapter is perfection! They are uniquely posed to show how to recover and break free from any of life’s adverse tentacles. Dr. Beare is a therapeutic magician.
I can not possibly tell you in review the many lessons learned you must read it!
One nugget. Many feel that the worst thing that can occur is to be triggered by random events or when hearing others share their traumas. Dr. Beare says, “If we are in fear and can get it out on paper with intense red paint, or in a wild dance, or by writing a poem, we keep the energy moving rather than letting it build into despair. When you are going through hell, keep going!”
“The way out is through.” I endorse this 1000%!
Perhaps, it is because I went through the fire in 334 pages of We Are Not Our Secrets, my memoir. Doing what he suggests transforms. I was able to release completely. Never having to revisit that pain again, unless it’s when helping others or sharing my story.
But the tears are temporary as when watching a movie. They are most often tears of joy.
I feel as Dr. Beare so eloquently writes, “The way out is through.” Dr. Beare is a trail blazer presenting new psychology techniques that are imperative. He outlines them, not only based upon his years of research and study, but his years of fighting addiction and winning. He believes the best teachers are those who have battled and won:. Survivors learn from survivors.
Go through your fires, as Dr. Beare suggests, because it is in this you will be set free! Thank you Dr. Beare for this treasure.
There’s so much magic in Dr. Beare’s book. The work book questions after every chapter is perfection! They are uniquely posed to show how to recover and break free from any of life’s adverse tentacles. Dr. Beare is a therapeutic magician.
I can not possibly tell you in review the many lessons learned you must read it!
One nugget. Many feel that the worst thing that can occur is to be triggered by random events or when hearing others share their traumas. Dr. Beare says, “If we are in fear and can get it out on paper with intense red paint, or in a wild dance, or by writing a poem, we keep the energy moving rather than letting it build into despair. When you are going through hell, keep going!”
“The way out is through.” I endorse this 1000%!
Perhaps, it is because I went through the fire in 334 pages of We Are Not Our Secrets, my memoir. Doing what he suggests transforms. I was able to release completely. Never having to revisit that pain again, unless it’s when helping others or sharing my story.
But the tears are temporary as when watching a movie. They are most often tears of joy.
I feel as Dr. Beare so eloquently writes, “The way out is through.” Dr. Beare is a trail blazer presenting new psychology techniques that are imperative. He outlines them, not only based upon his years of research and study, but his years of fighting addiction and winning. He believes the best teachers are those who have battled and won:. Survivors learn from survivors.
Go through your fires, as Dr. Beare suggests, because it is in this you will be set free! Thank you Dr. Beare for this treasure.
July 7, 2024
Straight to the heart
It is like the author speaks directly to my heart and get up and do things. The reflective questions at the end of each chapter really make you think and journal, which otherwise would have been left unanswered. For eaxmple I have never really thought about a Wake-up call that made me change the trajectory; it just happened. But having put that into writing I can reflect on it and be prepared to take things in my own hands.
As per the recommendation in this book, ever since I started keeping a journal by my bedside and noting my dreams I was able to know what I felt subconsciously. There are many more tidbits in this book which you can take away. Get yourself a copy!
It is like the author speaks directly to my heart and get up and do things. The reflective questions at the end of each chapter really make you think and journal, which otherwise would have been left unanswered. For eaxmple I have never really thought about a Wake-up call that made me change the trajectory; it just happened. But having put that into writing I can reflect on it and be prepared to take things in my own hands.
As per the recommendation in this book, ever since I started keeping a journal by my bedside and noting my dreams I was able to know what I felt subconsciously. There are many more tidbits in this book which you can take away. Get yourself a copy!
April 26, 2025
trauma is such a scary word
I found Stop Doing Sht You Don’t Want To* incredibly refreshing. Bob Beare blends personal stories — especially about his relationship with his dad — with powerful lessons on healing trauma and breaking free from old patterns. His background as a therapist gives real weight to his insights, but the book never feels heavy or clinical. Instead, it’s honest, relatable, and full of moments that really make you think. It’s a quick read, but it sticks with you long after you finish.
This isn’t just another self-help book; it’s a heartfelt guide for anyone ready to live with more honesty, freedom, and joy. Highly recommend it!
I found Stop Doing Sht You Don’t Want To* incredibly refreshing. Bob Beare blends personal stories — especially about his relationship with his dad — with powerful lessons on healing trauma and breaking free from old patterns. His background as a therapist gives real weight to his insights, but the book never feels heavy or clinical. Instead, it’s honest, relatable, and full of moments that really make you think. It’s a quick read, but it sticks with you long after you finish.
This isn’t just another self-help book; it’s a heartfelt guide for anyone ready to live with more honesty, freedom, and joy. Highly recommend it!
June 29, 2024
a guide to letting go of unhelpful patterns
“Stop Doing Sh*t You Don’t Want to Do: A Straightforward Guide to Letting Go of Unresolved Trauma” by Bob Beare is a candid and impactful book that addresses deep-seated emotional issues. This concise book offers practical techniques for personal healing and growth.. The author‘s straightforward approach makes complex psychological concepts accessible and relatable. I highly recommend it for its profound guidance, helping readers to break free from the chains of unresolved trauma.
“Stop Doing Sh*t You Don’t Want to Do: A Straightforward Guide to Letting Go of Unresolved Trauma” by Bob Beare is a candid and impactful book that addresses deep-seated emotional issues. This concise book offers practical techniques for personal healing and growth.. The author‘s straightforward approach makes complex psychological concepts accessible and relatable. I highly recommend it for its profound guidance, helping readers to break free from the chains of unresolved trauma.
September 30, 2024
To the point and helpful
This a refreshing take on self-help and healing. It skips the clinical jargon and flowery language to offer practical advice in everyday language. With humor and straightforward insights, the book provides tools to let go of trauma and live authentically. Perfect for anyone ready to break free from old patterns and embrace a more genuine life. If you liked "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck" or "Daring Greatly," this book’s witty, engaging style and real-world examples will resonate with you.
This a refreshing take on self-help and healing. It skips the clinical jargon and flowery language to offer practical advice in everyday language. With humor and straightforward insights, the book provides tools to let go of trauma and live authentically. Perfect for anyone ready to break free from old patterns and embrace a more genuine life. If you liked "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck" or "Daring Greatly," this book’s witty, engaging style and real-world examples will resonate with you.
March 13, 2024
Refreshing take on Mental Health
This book recognizes the importance of counseling and treatment but also dares to point out that medicating our way out of discomfort mostly benefits the pharmaceutical industry. I enjoyed the reference to CPT Kirk from Star Trek V, “I need my pain.” Trying and failing builds character and gives us the tools to overcome challenges. Overall a great book!
This book recognizes the importance of counseling and treatment but also dares to point out that medicating our way out of discomfort mostly benefits the pharmaceutical industry. I enjoyed the reference to CPT Kirk from Star Trek V, “I need my pain.” Trying and failing builds character and gives us the tools to overcome challenges. Overall a great book!
January 5, 2025
Dr. Bob invites us to rediscover our true wild and remove the shackles of social domestication. He shows us that to stop doing what we don't want to do, we need to come closer to who we are, and reclaim our authenticity. Dr. Bob takes us there with humor, candor, his Dad's wisdom, personal stories of death, divorce, and addiction, research, and reflective questions to help us recover, heal, and do that thing we REALLY want to do. Loved it. Highly recommend.
March 11, 2025
A refreshing take on self-help that cuts through the fluff and offers practical advice in everyday language. The author's straightforward approach makes complex psychological concepts accessible, providing valuable tools to break free from unresolved trauma and live more authentically.
I loved how the reflective questions at the end of each chapter foster deep introspection and encourage journaling, making the book both interactive and personally meaningful.
I loved how the reflective questions at the end of each chapter foster deep introspection and encourage journaling, making the book both interactive and personally meaningful.
September 3, 2023
A must read
Pretty much everyone today is depressed or dealing with some other trauma. Instead of dealing with it we tend to wallow in it and expect others to feel sorry for us. This book is a game changer. It teaches you to pick yourself up, face whatever you're deal with and go live your best life.
Pretty much everyone today is depressed or dealing with some other trauma. Instead of dealing with it we tend to wallow in it and expect others to feel sorry for us. This book is a game changer. It teaches you to pick yourself up, face whatever you're deal with and go live your best life.
September 18, 2023
The slap in the face I didn't know I needed
This book hooked me from the first sentence like it was talking about my actual life. I will be keeping this in my kindle arsenal for whenever I need a boost. It covers so much. I contacted the author personally to tell him how much I loved it.
This book hooked me from the first sentence like it was talking about my actual life. I will be keeping this in my kindle arsenal for whenever I need a boost. It covers so much. I contacted the author personally to tell him how much I loved it.
October 8, 2024
well done
I liked this book more than I thought I would. It’s a conglomeration of several other books I’ve read, but the way it’s presented is actually easy to consume, understand, and apply.
I figured it would be full of platitudes, but it’s actually an interesting read and an enjoyable one at that.
I liked this book more than I thought I would. It’s a conglomeration of several other books I’ve read, but the way it’s presented is actually easy to consume, understand, and apply.
I figured it would be full of platitudes, but it’s actually an interesting read and an enjoyable one at that.
October 22, 2024
Unstick Yourself
The mind is a powerful machine that, when stuck, can become problematic. The author gives valuable tips to unstick yourself from the past traumas you are going through. Everyone has trauma, the question is....are you willing get yourself free from it so that you don't keep doing what you don't want to do?
The mind is a powerful machine that, when stuck, can become problematic. The author gives valuable tips to unstick yourself from the past traumas you are going through. Everyone has trauma, the question is....are you willing get yourself free from it so that you don't keep doing what you don't want to do?
July 29, 2025
First Steps in Healing
This book is probably more aptly named “why you do sh*t you don’t want to do,” as it examines the author’s past, addiction, trauma, and how many of us deal with issues from childhood and adult life. A guided journey on understanding how trauma adverse childhood experiences lead to harmful behavior patterns, I found this to be a very interesting read.
This book is probably more aptly named “why you do sh*t you don’t want to do,” as it examines the author’s past, addiction, trauma, and how many of us deal with issues from childhood and adult life. A guided journey on understanding how trauma adverse childhood experiences lead to harmful behavior patterns, I found this to be a very interesting read.
August 28, 2023
one of the best book I read in recent time
The book helps me to refresh my self awareness and being one self. I like the question at the end of each chapter which helps to do some initial assessment
The book helps me to refresh my self awareness and being one self. I like the question at the end of each chapter which helps to do some initial assessment
April 6, 2024
well written and accessible
A solid intro for anyone new to shame and trauma work (via Jung and Brene Brown among others) as well as insightful guide for those already familiar with the concepts. Short worksheets at the end of each chapter invite the reader to take action.
A solid intro for anyone new to shame and trauma work (via Jung and Brene Brown among others) as well as insightful guide for those already familiar with the concepts. Short worksheets at the end of each chapter invite the reader to take action.
April 29, 2024
Eye opener!
Stop Doing Sh*t You Don't Want to Do: A Straightforward Guide to Letting Go of Unresolved Trauma by Bob Beare does exactly what the title suggests. This is a well researched and accessible book that will likely resonate with anyone who reads it.
Stop Doing Sh*t You Don't Want to Do: A Straightforward Guide to Letting Go of Unresolved Trauma by Bob Beare does exactly what the title suggests. This is a well researched and accessible book that will likely resonate with anyone who reads it.
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July 3, 2024Very helpful
Helpful and insightful. Gave me a new perspective and narrowed the target of things I should work on by its great tips. Thank you author for this book! Highly recommended 👌
Helpful and insightful. Gave me a new perspective and narrowed the target of things I should work on by its great tips. Thank you author for this book! Highly recommended 👌
December 13, 2024
Great reality check for those who experienced past traumas. The authors no nonsense writing style is a refreshing change from the fluffy "find your safe space" jargon that's become so popular. Here's to encouraging people to find their grit to move forward. Well done.
March 24, 2025
Refreshing
This is a refreshing reminder that you have the power to choose your path and love as you wish. Things in this book that caught my eye is the setting of boundaries which is very important and to me commands a lot of respect. Baby steps.
This is a refreshing reminder that you have the power to choose your path and love as you wish. Things in this book that caught my eye is the setting of boundaries which is very important and to me commands a lot of respect. Baby steps.
April 12, 2024
Good Book
An interesting book with a lot of good tips and strategies and good questions to help you reflect on your life. The chapter on addiction was confronting in a good way.
An interesting book with a lot of good tips and strategies and good questions to help you reflect on your life. The chapter on addiction was confronting in a good way.
November 24, 2024
Author Delivers. I highly recommend.
If you are in a rut and need a little strategic motivation to get back on track this book is a great read.
If you are in a rut and need a little strategic motivation to get back on track this book is a great read.
April 12, 2025
excellent
This book has a well laid out plan to dump the crap that doesn’t serve you. I highly recommend for anyone!
This book has a well laid out plan to dump the crap that doesn’t serve you. I highly recommend for anyone!
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews