When It Rains

by Maggie MacKellar

The heart-wrenching but triumphant story of rebuilding a life and a family.'My body, suddenly, carries two stories of loss ... One is easy for people to recognise. My mother died of cancer. I watched her age twenty-five years in eight weeks ... My other story marks me as different. It is more silent and more savage, it is not pure and no one knows how to approach it. Somewhere I lost my husband.' When Maggie Mackellar's vibrant young husband, father to a five-year-old daughter and an unborn son, dies tragically, Maggie is left widowed and due to give birth three months later to their second child. Then her beloved mother, backbone of the family, mother to three children, grandmother to two, dies suddenly of aggressive cancer. In two short years, Maggie's life has shattered. After a year, she gives up trying to juggle single motherhood and the demands of an academic career and returns with her children to the family farm in central western New South Wales to take stock and catch a breath. The farm becomes a redemptive, healing place for Maggie and her children as they battle the heat and drought that only the Australian landscape can offer. She throws herself into the horses, sheep, ducks and chickens and slowly, finally, realises she has found a new shape for herself. Written by a brilliant new talent, When It Rains is a meditation on grief and the vagaries of the human condition, and a stunning memoir about piecing back together a life, and moving forward, one step at a time.‘An unforgettable story of love and courage that inspires even as it breaks your heart’ -- Susan Duncan

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Australia, Biography Memoir, Grief, Family

177 pages, Kindle Edition

First published August 25, 2010

Reviews

[Kirsten · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is not one to speed read. It's written so thoughtfully, I was lulled in by the language. The topic, grief, is a bit tough, but the journey is so beautiful, with grief resolved through country living. The life of the farm and country trips evokes such wholesome living, quite the opposite of my suburban experience eg
"My kids have gone to sleep with a heaven of stars as the last thing they see before they close their eyes. They know what an owl sounds like as it sweeps low over our campsite hunting for mice, and they know what it's like to be dirty and happy and tired and proud of yourself, all at the same time."
Maybe I should go camping this year....

[Louise · Rating 5 out of 5]

An astonishing memoir. Maggie Mackellar faced two significant bereavements within quite a short space of time. Firstly her husband kills himself in rather dramatic circumstances, and then her mother gets a nasty cancer. It is about them both of course, but also about Maggie, her survival and her kids. It's remarkably well written, and a quick read despite the rather depressing subject matter. Maggie leaves her academic life in Sydney and packs up to retreat to the farm in the Central West where she grew up (and where I live). I enjoyed the familiarity of knowing the area, the land and the animals of which she writes.

[Proustitute (on hiatus) · Rating 5 out of 5]

It feels somehow wrong to call a memoir of death, loss, grief, and mourning beautiful, but MacKellar's prose is lilting, poetic, and heart-wrenchingly haunting. Her descriptions of mourning her husband, whom she lost to suicide after a long bout of mental illness, and her descriptions of her mother, whom she lost to cancer, are touching and painful to read. The quest for a more quiet life for her and her two children lead her to the countryside, and the details of how this more quiet life allows her to mourn—with Anne Carson's translation of Sappho's fragments beside her—and also cope are as beautiful as they are straight from the gut.

[Alicia Mikulandra · Rating 1 out of 5]

I thought this book had huge potential when I read the back of it. And it certainly could have. But in my opinion it was poorly written. I found the author wrote more about feelings and how she was feeling rather than the unfolding events of the story. I prefer both.

[Angelique Simonsen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gorgeous 😍

[Rach Denholm · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some very beautiful and emotive passages describing Maggie's grief and pain after her husband's suicide and mother's death soon after, from cancer. Sadly, interspersed between these are repetitive and drawn out pages of descriptions of mundane day to day life. I began the sequel but had to put it aside.

[Susan Austin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some beautiful writing in here about some very personal and painful experiences. Overall a little bit clunky and I felt she didn't explain enough about her husband's life pre and post illness, but a worthwhile memoir on one person's journey of coping with shocking bereavements.

[Katelyn · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved how poetic it was at times. This novel really gave a raw insight into dealing with grief. However i did find it a little repetitive at times but overall i really loved this novel.

[Anne Green · Rating 5 out of 5]

An intensely moving memoir of the author's struggle to reconcile the loss of both her mother and her husband in a short space of time. Her recovery is fraught with grief, anger, confusion but through it all she finds, through determination, devotion to her children and sheer doggedness, a new life in a place where she can find a kind of peace and the beginning of resolution. Written in wise, thoughtful lyrical prose, this is a book you want to keep dipping into long after you've finished it.

This quote about motherhood is lovely:

"We need our mothers. Even when we’re old, there’s a place in all of us, a tender, delicate place that longs to be held, to be nurtured and protected. Even when our mothers have hurt us, shaped us in destructive ways, neglected us, left us, we still want them ..."

[Edward · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the memoir of a woman who suffered tremendous loss. Her husband committed suicide and then two years later her mother died of an aggressive cancer. When her husband died, their daughter was five and the author was carrying their unborn son. The author gave up her career as an academic and moved back to the country to live on the family farm. This is a wonderful memoir written by a strong and resilient woman.

[John · Rating 5 out of 5]

An unexpected gem.

An unexpected gem. She gives life and detail to grief and the emotions that join on like barnacles. Both expected and tragic have a voice and form that sticks with me. The relocation from the city to the farm is my own dream. Swapping hardships and finding support from unexpected sources. It’s a good read even if you’re not grieving, helping you understand what loss does to our minds.

[Alice Herley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was so good I find it hard to describe. The way Maggie Mackellar writes feels so comforting and safe and real. It was a very painful book and it made me cry throughout the whole thing. I think one lesson I took from this memoir was the power space, fresh air, non-negotiable routine and nature has on a persons resilience and tenacity. These aspects of our environment make us stronger people, especially in the face of death and grief. Highly recommend!!! I loved it

[Maddie Robertson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Despite the tragedies Maggie has face in her adult life, she writes her story with such beautiful poetry and unlike a lot of other biographies, doesn’t try to twist everything into a positive. She describes exactly how she felt and conveys raw emotion in her writing. Not one to speed read but one to reflect on.

[Annie Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

This lady has poured out her grief. An emotional book. She made me cry so much with her mothers death and the impact on her life - forever! My own mother passed away several years ago and there is no end to the pain .

[Jane · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautifully written memoir of Maggie’s life after the loss of her husband and mum. I found it very hard to put down, really enjoyed the way Maggie tells her story, her imagery makes you feel as though you’re on her farm with her. I loved it!!

[Cartier · Rating 1 out of 5]

Some books draw me in and I finish them quicker than I picked them up; this book was not one of them. It took me 6 months to make my way through it as I just didn’t find it interesting, and at times seriously questioned whether to bother finishing it or not.

[Anna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Easy reading on a very exhausting subject. The country aspect was very enjoyable.

[Natalie Wales · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book. Raw, honest and so personal, I feel like I've made a new friend in Maggie.

[Emma Jane Holmes · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love this book!

[Duffy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mirrors my life and expresses exactly how I have not been able to articulate. Very cathartic read.

[Wendy · Rating 5 out of 5]

A beautiful memoir!

[Julie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This little memoir didn't take me long to read, and once I started I wanted to carry on till it was finished, so I have dark circles this morning after sitting up in bed reading till almost 1 am. Maggie tells us the story of her life, how as a young mother of a five year old daughter and an unborn son, her husband spiralled out of control, with his mental health becoming more and more unstable. Faced with bringing up her young children by herself, she is shocked with her mothers cancer diagnosis and death not long after.

Finding herself grieving and trying to work and bring up her children by herself, Maggie packs the family up and heads out to the country to stay on the family farm. It is here that you can feel a healing happening, a bit of normality even though her dreams are haunted by her husband.

I like a memoir, it reminds us of our own frailty and vulnerability, how precious our lives are and how much we touch others in our life. It can help us also to remember that we are strong, that we can get through and that even though our stories and journeys are different we all just want love and happiness.

[Our Library Mornington · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a wonderfully frank and absorbing memoir about the courage of a young woman with two children. Her husband has died tragically and she moves to the country to resettle and to come to terms with her loss.

It is a very honest book. The woman has also spent some time nursing her mother who has died of cancer. so there are two and one of her children, perhaps reacting to the death of his father, is at times out of control with tantrums. She decides to give up her high profile job and moves in on a farm with her aunt and uncle and the healing power of time and being with animals and nature works its magic and she finds herself and her children at peace again. This would be a good book group book as well.

Picked by Mary (Mobile Library)

[Tony Nielsen · Rating 4 out of 5]

When it rains is a sobering read. Full of raw sadness and the stark reality of grief.
Actually I found it cathartic because its so honest and wheile the road to recovery is
a long one, the grind to get there is compelling. Maggie's life is tough following two
deaths, firstly her husband, and then her mother. As the mother of a young family its
a far from easy ride, and her description of her daily struggle is confronting and real.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

MacKellar is a beautiful writer. Her book is full of wonderful similes and metaphors. I appreciated having an insight into someone's grief of having lost loved ones. It helped me to understand some of what someone close to me must be going through. I would have liked to hear more about Mackellar's life with her husband before his passing.

[Steve Castley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This memoir about death and grieving is beautifully told by Maggie MacKellar. It is sensitive and she maintains the readers interest by revealing a bit of the story at a time. Flash backs are well written and complete the story. I love this book and passed it onto friends, all of whom have loved it as well.

[Leisa]

I honestly couldn't put this book down. Her grief was chronicled in such a raw, yet divinely beautiful way. She expressed in words everything that was in my own heart. The peace she attained was beautiful and took a journey to get there. I found myself taking copious notes as I read.

[Lucia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Good book.

[Rosemary · Rating 5 out of 5]

The best

[Liz · Rating 3 out of 5]

This story was beautifully told, with good learnings to take from it.