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Get Honest or Die Lying: Why Small Talk Sucks
An Atria Book. Atria Books has a great book for every reader.
240 pages, Hardcover
Published May 21, 2024
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 103 reviews
October 14, 2024
From my European perspective, I'm fascinated by Charlamagne as a media personality and the immense cultural impact he has developed, also in the political realm. And to say it right away: He made his name as a conversationalist and radio host, so I listened to the audio book - and I guess to read this in print is way more tedious. Also, the title is misleading: As a German, so someone who hails from a country that has a tendency to re-frame common rudeness to be noble honesty, I learned about the actual power of polite small talk in the American Midwest, but Charlamagne doesn't mean to ponder harmless chit-chat aimed to stabilize social relations, no, he defines small talk as generally harmful content, so time-wasting social media apps, speech patterns intended to put others down, white lies that end up haunting relationships, etc.pp, you get the idea. His point is to cut the distracting crap, face oneself and tackle real issues, hence the title.
Which means that the whole thing is a kind of self-help book sprinkled with tidbits about the author's own experiences, intended to encourage his audience to use critical thinking and challenge themselves - crafted in a very American way, but often equally true for other parts of the world. And although I don't always agree with Charlamagne and I'm outright annoyed by his admiration for some people that basically embody cheap verbal transgression (Stern, Rogan), I applaud him for seriously reaching out to large audiences and dare them to leave their argumentative comfort zone, as well as his decision to speak out about male depression and being the victim of sexual abuse in order to promote getting help to process trauma.
I was lucky to quickly get access to this audio book via the Libby account at my NC library - by now, the waiting list is ridiculously long - people in the States do listen to Charlamagne. Also people like Christiane Amanpour: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeHja...
Which means that the whole thing is a kind of self-help book sprinkled with tidbits about the author's own experiences, intended to encourage his audience to use critical thinking and challenge themselves - crafted in a very American way, but often equally true for other parts of the world. And although I don't always agree with Charlamagne and I'm outright annoyed by his admiration for some people that basically embody cheap verbal transgression (Stern, Rogan), I applaud him for seriously reaching out to large audiences and dare them to leave their argumentative comfort zone, as well as his decision to speak out about male depression and being the victim of sexual abuse in order to promote getting help to process trauma.
I was lucky to quickly get access to this audio book via the Libby account at my NC library - by now, the waiting list is ridiculously long - people in the States do listen to Charlamagne. Also people like Christiane Amanpour: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeHja...
April 13, 2025
I did not intend to read this book in a single setting, and yet here we are. Oops. I think that itself is a testament to Charlamagne’s talent as a podcast host. His narration was as engaging as the content within the book. And at a short 240 pages, this unique combination of part-bio, part self-help, part discourse on today’s social media and political landscape, made for an insightful and entertaining read at about the length of a Netflix movie.
One aspect of the book that surprised me is how candid he is when it comes to discussing his past mistakes, deep traumas, and mental health struggles. His reflections on how therapy, combined with things like meditation and literal tree hugging, have helped to shape his more turbulent upbringing and early career into something much more stable, will be impactful for many of his listeners, particularly among Black men, who often face cultural stigmas around mental health struggles.
I love the way he uses his voice for the greater good, even when I don’t always agree with the message. Kudos to him for keeping it real and always looking out for community over self.
Thank you, Atria Books, for sending me a copy.
One aspect of the book that surprised me is how candid he is when it comes to discussing his past mistakes, deep traumas, and mental health struggles. His reflections on how therapy, combined with things like meditation and literal tree hugging, have helped to shape his more turbulent upbringing and early career into something much more stable, will be impactful for many of his listeners, particularly among Black men, who often face cultural stigmas around mental health struggles.
I love the way he uses his voice for the greater good, even when I don’t always agree with the message. Kudos to him for keeping it real and always looking out for community over self.
Thank you, Atria Books, for sending me a copy.
May 28, 2024
I loved Black Privilege. I liked Shook One. I think I actively dislike this book. I do believe that this book would be better in audio format.
Basically this book is full of stories that you have heard before if you are a Charlamagne fan. I have been one for a decade through brilliant idiots, the breakfast club, and numerous other platforms. The book is structured as a self help type book but the self help "advice" type sections of the books are minimal at best. As a fan, I think he could have stringed together a more coherent book that's stuffed with quotes, old stories we have heard in previous books, and old man yelling at the sky stories about why social media is bad.
The whole book left me going "what the hell is the point of all of this."
Basically it is just not the strongest out of charlamagnes books. I recommend getting this one in audiobook if you are going to get it at all. Or borrow this one from the library.
Basically this book is full of stories that you have heard before if you are a Charlamagne fan. I have been one for a decade through brilliant idiots, the breakfast club, and numerous other platforms. The book is structured as a self help type book but the self help "advice" type sections of the books are minimal at best. As a fan, I think he could have stringed together a more coherent book that's stuffed with quotes, old stories we have heard in previous books, and old man yelling at the sky stories about why social media is bad.
The whole book left me going "what the hell is the point of all of this."
Basically it is just not the strongest out of charlamagnes books. I recommend getting this one in audiobook if you are going to get it at all. Or borrow this one from the library.
September 3, 2024
Get Honest or Die Lying is Charlamagne Tha God’s latest book, where he dismisses the use of/ need for small talk — Cut to the chase.
You can’t heal what you don’t reveal — Are your conversations surface level or do they have more depth? Are you honest with your friends and with yourself?
While I liked Charlamagne’s first book more, I appreciate hearing his perspective again in Get Honest or Die Lying. His observations about social media and the illusions of it today were spot on in the chapter: Delusion, Entitlement and Idiocracy. The audiobook is the way to go — 3.5 stars
You can’t heal what you don’t reveal — Are your conversations surface level or do they have more depth? Are you honest with your friends and with yourself?
While I liked Charlamagne’s first book more, I appreciate hearing his perspective again in Get Honest or Die Lying. His observations about social media and the illusions of it today were spot on in the chapter: Delusion, Entitlement and Idiocracy. The audiobook is the way to go — 3.5 stars
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October 2, 2024Glad I read this to know something more about him than my preconceived ideas based on his name. Seems like a very good person...
May 25, 2024
It was a quick listen. 6.5 hours Me and my husband listened to it on the way to the book signing and back home. I’m a fan of Charla so I might be biased but…
this book was incredible. I remember when he first started posting about it I was looking for a book about navigating the world in a bunch of fake ish and I swear - I went to Instagram and his post about the book was the first post I saw. That’s exactly what it was.
It sounds like a Ted talk or podcast if you will, with several different topics. Like reading textbook and you can see what the chapter will be about from the names.
I like the depth in each chapter but not so much that he loses you. Great examples.
I love that he talks about his wife. And clears up some things I wondered about over the years.. with friends.. *clears throat*
Now that I have the hard cover, I’m going to go back through and highlight because he dropped some gems!!!
this book was incredible. I remember when he first started posting about it I was looking for a book about navigating the world in a bunch of fake ish and I swear - I went to Instagram and his post about the book was the first post I saw. That’s exactly what it was.
It sounds like a Ted talk or podcast if you will, with several different topics. Like reading textbook and you can see what the chapter will be about from the names.
I like the depth in each chapter but not so much that he loses you. Great examples.
I love that he talks about his wife. And clears up some things I wondered about over the years.. with friends.. *clears throat*
Now that I have the hard cover, I’m going to go back through and highlight because he dropped some gems!!!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 21, 2024
3.5 ⭐️
The beginning was stronger than the end. Some things he discussed were repetitive and probably were mention in his other books (which I did not read). Overall I enjoyed reading this book and would recommend some of the ideas would be great conversation starters.
“Let’s discuss”
The beginning was stronger than the end. Some things he discussed were repetitive and probably were mention in his other books (which I did not read). Overall I enjoyed reading this book and would recommend some of the ideas would be great conversation starters.
“Let’s discuss”
September 17, 2024
I enjoyed this book. There were some great takeaways.
April 1, 2025
Very good! Charlamagne always drop gems in his books! This one was no different! No matter what ppl say he always has the best advice in his books! I love that he is an advocate for therapy!
June 18, 2024
I couldn’t make it past few chapters. It was a rather boring read.
May 25, 2024
The fact that this turned out to be a one-sitting read, is a fantastic example of holding one’s attention through engaging and timely thoughts being processed through jaunty witty prose. I’ll say this, Charlamange knows how to organize and arrange his thoughts cohesively and that adds up to a valuable book, urging us to eliminate the small talk and begin having big conversations with each other. At work, at home, among friends, and strangers even.
To clarify; Charlemagne says “To be clear, when I say “small talk” here I’m not just saying you can’t chat about the weather or ask coworkers how traffic was on the way to the job. I mean small talk as a symbol of our lack of authentic communication. Both as individuals and collectively.”
And through 29 chapters (he kept them short, because he was worried about the attention span of potential readers) he goes on to effectively layout why talking small sucks and the potential damage in continuing with small conversations.He consistently cajoles readers to reach for the best version of self. “The key is larger conversations, internally and with people around you. It will not come through small talk with others and damn sure not by making small talk with yourself.”
He really finishes strong with a chapter entitled, “The Blessed Don’t Beef with the Miserable “ Because of social media we are being bombarded with noise that some mistake for real news, and if you choose to engage, be wary of who is on the opposite of that connection. “But again, think about who you’re really engaging with in these circumstances. It’s not college professors or philosophers or journalists sitting in an office lined with books who’ve come to their opinions after years of research. The person you’re arguing with is probably literally sitting on the toilet with their pants down around their ankles, Pornhub on the laptop, and . . . let me stop there.” Yeah, well done Charlamagne. Big thanks to Netgalley and Simon&Schuster for an advance DRC. Look for this book 5/28/24 wherever books are sold.
To clarify; Charlemagne says “To be clear, when I say “small talk” here I’m not just saying you can’t chat about the weather or ask coworkers how traffic was on the way to the job. I mean small talk as a symbol of our lack of authentic communication. Both as individuals and collectively.”
And through 29 chapters (he kept them short, because he was worried about the attention span of potential readers) he goes on to effectively layout why talking small sucks and the potential damage in continuing with small conversations.He consistently cajoles readers to reach for the best version of self. “The key is larger conversations, internally and with people around you. It will not come through small talk with others and damn sure not by making small talk with yourself.”
He really finishes strong with a chapter entitled, “The Blessed Don’t Beef with the Miserable “ Because of social media we are being bombarded with noise that some mistake for real news, and if you choose to engage, be wary of who is on the opposite of that connection. “But again, think about who you’re really engaging with in these circumstances. It’s not college professors or philosophers or journalists sitting in an office lined with books who’ve come to their opinions after years of research. The person you’re arguing with is probably literally sitting on the toilet with their pants down around their ankles, Pornhub on the laptop, and . . . let me stop there.” Yeah, well done Charlamagne. Big thanks to Netgalley and Simon&Schuster for an advance DRC. Look for this book 5/28/24 wherever books are sold.
May 30, 2024
I listened to the audio book. Charlamagne quotes Denzel in the book, "If you don't read the news [this book], you're uninformed. If you do read the news [this book], you're misinformed." I've listened to Charlamagne for years, and I respect the work that he does for others. But nothing he says truly surprises me anymore - he speaks to get a reaction. It's his lifeblood. I don't deny his lived experience (why I wanted to read this book - I want to learn more), but I don't know who the "real" Charlamagne is. I'm all for evolving and changing, but he speaks out of both sides of his mouth, and his world view is so different than mine. It's annoying how many are comforted by shared negativity and misery, particularly in the political arena. He's got a chip on his shoulder and despite his valiant efforts at repairing it, he's still hell-bent on blaming someone else (or a whole blanketed group of people) for all the trouble in his world: media, social media, conservatives, definitely all white people (exception: Judy Blume), Trump, people with money, etc. The truth is, as a whole, we're not all that different or divided. I appreciate his efforts in (maybe?) trying to bridge the gaps, but perpetuation is not a solution. Charlamagne is hard on those he hates and soft on those he loves. It's banal and biased. While he's not always wrong and there are fleeting moments of brilliance and insight, anything other than his personal recollections and memories is full of obstinate "misinformation." Seriously, Charlamagne, let's discuss.
July 7, 2024
Charlamagne has very traditionally boomer perspectives on certain issues but has a very unique background and blend to his takes as well as an attitude of being open to being wrong that made listening to what he had to say, even when I so totally disagreed with him, much more palatable and even fun for me. I believe him when Charlamagne says that this book is his attempt to cut through the small talk and have discussions about the important issues. I sometimes take the complete opposite opinion, I sometimes think Charlamagne is speaking from places of spite or fat phobia, and sometimes I think he hits the nail on the head.
Ultimately this isn’t a book about Charlamagne’s opinions, even though that literally is what this is. It’s a book about how Charlamagne wishes to discuss his opinions, and I like that.
He rails against cancel culture, he claims that young people are too entitled and that we should be willing to do unpaid labor and stay late and not expect promotions because life is unfair, but notes that disadvantages based on sexual or racial discrimination are total malarkey.
He says that republicans speak like their constituents and that democrats would poll better if they would just say “bullshit” literally once.
He says that you absolutely have to believe in people, believe in kids. Knowing that someone believes in them is so much more important than protecting from disappointment, he doesn’t believe in creating unnecessary or tough love obstacles for children. The only acceptable answer to: “I wanna be an astronaut.” Is “What planet are you going to?”
After finishing this book, I really just feel like I got to sit down and listen to an old man yap for a long time. Yes, some of his views are outdated, but also this guy has thought a lot about things, and I feel like that’s worth understanding. I came out of the book respecting him.
Ultimately this isn’t a book about Charlamagne’s opinions, even though that literally is what this is. It’s a book about how Charlamagne wishes to discuss his opinions, and I like that.
He rails against cancel culture, he claims that young people are too entitled and that we should be willing to do unpaid labor and stay late and not expect promotions because life is unfair, but notes that disadvantages based on sexual or racial discrimination are total malarkey.
He says that republicans speak like their constituents and that democrats would poll better if they would just say “bullshit” literally once.
He says that you absolutely have to believe in people, believe in kids. Knowing that someone believes in them is so much more important than protecting from disappointment, he doesn’t believe in creating unnecessary or tough love obstacles for children. The only acceptable answer to: “I wanna be an astronaut.” Is “What planet are you going to?”
After finishing this book, I really just feel like I got to sit down and listen to an old man yap for a long time. Yes, some of his views are outdated, but also this guy has thought a lot about things, and I feel like that’s worth understanding. I came out of the book respecting him.
September 1, 2024
I have yet to ever listen to Charlamagne’s radio program but knew who he was through his more viral ventures into political arenas. So I was interested to see this new audiobook pop up on Libby for a way to find out more about this popular voice in politics, race, and pop culture.
And now having listened to it, i can understand his popularity—I liked his frankness and authenticity, as well as his willingness to share personal experiences in discussions on his disdain for gossipy social media and how people imprudently use these echo chambers to get their news. He pushes readers to dig deeper and seek more objective sources, and embrace the discomfort that ‘real’ conversations and research can generate and cause, as that’s where real growth and knowledge comes from.
I totally agree with all that.
So, I thought this was an interesting and actionable listen, and I’ll definitely plan to seek out his other books, if not even his daily show via iheartradio.
And now having listened to it, i can understand his popularity—I liked his frankness and authenticity, as well as his willingness to share personal experiences in discussions on his disdain for gossipy social media and how people imprudently use these echo chambers to get their news. He pushes readers to dig deeper and seek more objective sources, and embrace the discomfort that ‘real’ conversations and research can generate and cause, as that’s where real growth and knowledge comes from.
I totally agree with all that.
So, I thought this was an interesting and actionable listen, and I’ll definitely plan to seek out his other books, if not even his daily show via iheartradio.
August 23, 2024
I learned more about myself in the last chapter of this book than I had in my last 5 therapy sessions!
As a long-time hater of small talk (dating and networking are my worst nightmares, let me tell you), I always just assumed that it was me being an aloof asshole. Thanks to Charla & Dr. Glenn Patrick Doyle, I discovered that it is a trauma response. Having experienced a lot of loss at a young age, I understand that time is fleeting, so I don’t want to waste mine. 🤯
I may not always agree with the nonsense that he says on The Breakfast Club, but I think this is where Charlamagne shines. So many great nuggets of wisdom. I look forward to reading this again!
As a long-time hater of small talk (dating and networking are my worst nightmares, let me tell you), I always just assumed that it was me being an aloof asshole. Thanks to Charla & Dr. Glenn Patrick Doyle, I discovered that it is a trauma response. Having experienced a lot of loss at a young age, I understand that time is fleeting, so I don’t want to waste mine. 🤯
I may not always agree with the nonsense that he says on The Breakfast Club, but I think this is where Charlamagne shines. So many great nuggets of wisdom. I look forward to reading this again!
August 19, 2024
Thank you to Atria Books for the finished copy and to Simon Audio for the ALC to review.
I think audio is the way to go when reading this one, and am glad I read this, I need to read more of his works. Did I agree with everything he said? No but overall I thought he was on point with his thoughts and had some really good nuggets that I took away out of here and will refer back to. (Which is why I was glad to have the physical copy for my shelves.)
I think audio is the way to go when reading this one, and am glad I read this, I need to read more of his works. Did I agree with everything he said? No but overall I thought he was on point with his thoughts and had some really good nuggets that I took away out of here and will refer back to. (Which is why I was glad to have the physical copy for my shelves.)
September 16, 2024
I love the title and I love the book even better. Charlamange nails it when he comments on the failures of modern life and the solutions to fixing those failures. Tell the truth to yourself and others. Do something meaningful with your life. Live with integrity. Develop character and wisdom instead of chasing fame and money. He nailed it. Bravo.
September 22, 2024
Surpsringly incisive at points, some genuinely impressive and intriguing insights, I might read some others of his.
January 16, 2025
A quick read. I expected it to be a disaster, but I actually enjoyed it. Used audio and hard copy.
August 4, 2024
Charlamagne has written three books. I’ve read them all. I loved 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐏𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐞 and 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐎𝐧𝐞𝐬. And I’m happy to say this one did not disappoint.
Although I was gifted a digital copy from the publisher, I chose to purchase and listen to the audiobook instead. That was a great choice for me because Charlamagne’s narration was awesome. He tackles tough topics in a lighthearted way.
I must say, in this book Charlamagne appears to be calmer, more mature. I love that he takes accountability for some of his harsh comments and inappropriate actions from the past. There’s an entire chapter in which he gives his wife praise for all she’s done for him. That was nice to hear considering he aired out their dirty laundry in his previous books.
I enjoyed the wide range of topics that’s discussed. For example, he holds hip-hop artists accountable for their self-destructive lyrics. He boldly calls out Gen Z for being impatient and having an “I want it now” attitude. He explains the importance of allowing people to evolve, instead of embracing cancel culture. He even put social media influencers on blast by saying some of them are merely pretending to live glamours lives. When in reality they’re using stolen credit cards to fund lavish vacations.
But of all the chapters in the book, it’s Chapter 16, 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘕𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘍𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘈𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘯 𝘔𝘤𝘎𝘳𝘶𝘥𝘦𝘳 that’s most impactful. 𝗜 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝘃𝗲 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘃𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗡𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿. Aaron McGruder, the creator of The Boondocks delivers a compelling message about racism in America.
I agreed with about 95% of the book. And even though I’d already heard some of Charlamagne’s stories on 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘉𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘊𝘭𝘶𝘣, I enjoyed hearing a more detailed version in this context. Each chapter is short and to the point. All ending with the words “Let’s Discuss…”
Although I was gifted a digital copy from the publisher, I chose to purchase and listen to the audiobook instead. That was a great choice for me because Charlamagne’s narration was awesome. He tackles tough topics in a lighthearted way.
I must say, in this book Charlamagne appears to be calmer, more mature. I love that he takes accountability for some of his harsh comments and inappropriate actions from the past. There’s an entire chapter in which he gives his wife praise for all she’s done for him. That was nice to hear considering he aired out their dirty laundry in his previous books.
I enjoyed the wide range of topics that’s discussed. For example, he holds hip-hop artists accountable for their self-destructive lyrics. He boldly calls out Gen Z for being impatient and having an “I want it now” attitude. He explains the importance of allowing people to evolve, instead of embracing cancel culture. He even put social media influencers on blast by saying some of them are merely pretending to live glamours lives. When in reality they’re using stolen credit cards to fund lavish vacations.
But of all the chapters in the book, it’s Chapter 16, 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘕𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘍𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘈𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘯 𝘔𝘤𝘎𝘳𝘶𝘥𝘦𝘳 that’s most impactful. 𝗜 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝘃𝗲 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘃𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗹𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗡𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿. Aaron McGruder, the creator of The Boondocks delivers a compelling message about racism in America.
I agreed with about 95% of the book. And even though I’d already heard some of Charlamagne’s stories on 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘉𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘊𝘭𝘶𝘣, I enjoyed hearing a more detailed version in this context. Each chapter is short and to the point. All ending with the words “Let’s Discuss…”
October 23, 2024
I heard Charlamagne Tha God on a podcast talking about his book and decided to listen to it. Small talk is an important part of socializing and I was put off by the podcast because I am learning how to make friends and wondered when small talk actually sucks. This is a business mindset. Chapter 22ish in the book the author talks about someone unnecessarily asking about his day or life or whatever small talk when they could have cut straight to the point and done the big ask upfront. This seems rude! But he made the point that the person already knew him and he felt they were wasting his time with idle chatter. For busy and business minded people this makes sense, that if they aren't making money they are losing money(not true, don't overwork yourselves!) so please don't waste their time with small talk when the point of you being in their presence is to ask for a favor or something you need.
This book is not about only having deep thought provoking conversations with strangers at bars like the podcast made it seem. Small talk in the business world sucks, when talking to people you know. This book does not address small talk at social events or situations where it is polite and a networking strategy.
The advice in this book is not for me, but it might be motivational for someone else. I am not actively a business professional, nor am I looking to be in the future. I don't have business ambitions, making more and more money is not my goal in life. I'm working on friendship at the moment.
"Never apologize for wanting more for your life. In sports, acting, rapping, business, we praise who is the best. ...Your job is to make choices that help you get where you want to without hurting anyone else in the process."
"Small talk, small thoughts, small ambitions. When you think small you end up hating on the people you grew up with that advanced past you. Trust me that type of hate causes a particularly potent brand of venom." Hmm, not everyone is jealous of other people's success!
Oh... Ch 26 ends with the author praising an artist who does macro-talk to ppst social media for one person, i thought it would be themself, but instead it is to stalk Rihanna? To breathe the same air as Rihanna again... She just had a kid and is married now but keep on bothering her to get another music hit... WTF? You're not an imposter if you are a stalker? She ain't his friend or coworker, bruh. This is a bad way to use social media... Unless of course you are an artist and social media is how you make money?? Idk not my life.
This book is not about only having deep thought provoking conversations with strangers at bars like the podcast made it seem. Small talk in the business world sucks, when talking to people you know. This book does not address small talk at social events or situations where it is polite and a networking strategy.
The advice in this book is not for me, but it might be motivational for someone else. I am not actively a business professional, nor am I looking to be in the future. I don't have business ambitions, making more and more money is not my goal in life. I'm working on friendship at the moment.
"Never apologize for wanting more for your life. In sports, acting, rapping, business, we praise who is the best. ...Your job is to make choices that help you get where you want to without hurting anyone else in the process."
"Small talk, small thoughts, small ambitions. When you think small you end up hating on the people you grew up with that advanced past you. Trust me that type of hate causes a particularly potent brand of venom." Hmm, not everyone is jealous of other people's success!
Oh... Ch 26 ends with the author praising an artist who does macro-talk to ppst social media for one person, i thought it would be themself, but instead it is to stalk Rihanna? To breathe the same air as Rihanna again... She just had a kid and is married now but keep on bothering her to get another music hit... WTF? You're not an imposter if you are a stalker? She ain't his friend or coworker, bruh. This is a bad way to use social media... Unless of course you are an artist and social media is how you make money?? Idk not my life.
July 1, 2024
I liked the book and agree with most points like having deep talks, not gossiping, and nature.
I do not like/agree: Many times, people with no or few degrees want to assert they are better by saying that those with degrees cannot think right in some way. I see this in Greek communities where they try to subtly put down the educated or trick them in business. If one has good traits before a degree, it can usually just enhance them. There are different smarts, and having more than one is a plus.
I do not agree with what one man he likes saying that everything is black against white. White people try to take down other white peoel in church, business, or other. Look at Trump's trial. Obama is half white, and I think his mom and grandmother brought him up. I don't know about some villages in the South, but I don't think most whites look at everything in a black-and-white lens. How about Latinos, Asians from Indians to Indonesians to Chinese? Mixed people? American Indians?
How many countries in Africa would welcome a white President? How many Africans think in some way blacks are better than whites? Maybe it is natural that people think what they are is better AND many look at each person separately, as they know many in their families are jerks.
Not every white, black, immigrant (which we are all) person is the same.
On talk between generations: True, and while for many it is okay that children get a sex-change operation, if a woman dates a man three years younger, she is a cougar or sick. Many things for women are centuries back still.
On education: At 18 at NYU I wondered why I was carrying bags, studying with no pay and not working as I did in first grade. Universities are a business and often are not offering true debates from. Various sides of topics, which he didn't touch upon, and there should be university insurance or government-imposed money penalties if one graduated, shows they are looking for work, and can't find work.
Some may be happy in the neighborhood they grew up having a "simple" life with family, work, and community.
He did speak the Truth on many keeping people down, especially I'd say women, including confident white women with lots going for them, and including those in their family, church, schools, community, and more!
Charlemagne, continue to be grateful to your wife. She has been great to you. And you are good in wanting to encourage your children and give to others.
I do not like/agree: Many times, people with no or few degrees want to assert they are better by saying that those with degrees cannot think right in some way. I see this in Greek communities where they try to subtly put down the educated or trick them in business. If one has good traits before a degree, it can usually just enhance them. There are different smarts, and having more than one is a plus.
I do not agree with what one man he likes saying that everything is black against white. White people try to take down other white peoel in church, business, or other. Look at Trump's trial. Obama is half white, and I think his mom and grandmother brought him up. I don't know about some villages in the South, but I don't think most whites look at everything in a black-and-white lens. How about Latinos, Asians from Indians to Indonesians to Chinese? Mixed people? American Indians?
How many countries in Africa would welcome a white President? How many Africans think in some way blacks are better than whites? Maybe it is natural that people think what they are is better AND many look at each person separately, as they know many in their families are jerks.
Not every white, black, immigrant (which we are all) person is the same.
On talk between generations: True, and while for many it is okay that children get a sex-change operation, if a woman dates a man three years younger, she is a cougar or sick. Many things for women are centuries back still.
On education: At 18 at NYU I wondered why I was carrying bags, studying with no pay and not working as I did in first grade. Universities are a business and often are not offering true debates from. Various sides of topics, which he didn't touch upon, and there should be university insurance or government-imposed money penalties if one graduated, shows they are looking for work, and can't find work.
Some may be happy in the neighborhood they grew up having a "simple" life with family, work, and community.
He did speak the Truth on many keeping people down, especially I'd say women, including confident white women with lots going for them, and including those in their family, church, schools, community, and more!
Charlemagne, continue to be grateful to your wife. She has been great to you. And you are good in wanting to encourage your children and give to others.
October 18, 2024
Started out strong, but went downhill. There were a few offensive and crude rambles that seemed to have no point. I understand that as a conservative white mom of seven kids I’m NOT the intended audience. I cringed more than a few times. However, I’ve got four teens adopted from trauma situations (three from South Carolina) and I love finding stories they can relate to and be inspired by. In the end, this was not that.
A few well chosen YouTube clips would encompass the lessons of this book.
Here are some takeaways from my POV:
You can’t heal what you don’t reveal
Put your phone down and have your own thoughts and opinions, not the ones the internet chooses for you.
Denzel Washington said, “If you don’t read the newspaper, you are uninformed. If you do read it, you are misinformed.” All media comes with an opinion, a slant. Social media only comes with a desire to attract you and is often a pile of sensational lies for people with no knowledge of the subject. My assessment: Remove 80% of media consumption, focus on credible sources.
We all know about AA: Alcoholics Anonymous. In today’s world we need a new kind of AA: Algorithm Anonymous.
It is not your job to protect people from failure. It is your job to help them reach as high as they can. Be a dream supporter not a dream crusher. When your child tells you they want to be an NBA player ask them what team do you want to play for?
A few well chosen YouTube clips would encompass the lessons of this book.
Here are some takeaways from my POV:
You can’t heal what you don’t reveal
Put your phone down and have your own thoughts and opinions, not the ones the internet chooses for you.
Denzel Washington said, “If you don’t read the newspaper, you are uninformed. If you do read it, you are misinformed.” All media comes with an opinion, a slant. Social media only comes with a desire to attract you and is often a pile of sensational lies for people with no knowledge of the subject. My assessment: Remove 80% of media consumption, focus on credible sources.
We all know about AA: Alcoholics Anonymous. In today’s world we need a new kind of AA: Algorithm Anonymous.
It is not your job to protect people from failure. It is your job to help them reach as high as they can. Be a dream supporter not a dream crusher. When your child tells you they want to be an NBA player ask them what team do you want to play for?
June 18, 2024
Had never heard of this guy until I saw him on a talk show on TV, and I was so impressed by how well spoken he was that I went out and bought his book. Never have I ever used so many page clips in a single book! Most everything I read in here is something I think when I see the news or get together with people or listen to the youth of today. And he’s right…most people are small talkers, and I’m one of them. Because on most of the topics, if you state your opinion on anything, you get shot down, because someone always knows why you’re wrong. Everyone is supposed to listen, but everyone also wants to talk. If we all just took the time to cut off the media, put down our devices and just talk from fact, the world would be a better place. There seems to be no such thing as respecting someone else’s opinions nowadays because everyone is so sure their own opinion is the right one. So, congratulations to Charlemagne Tha God! “ Let’s discuss!”
“…small talk is killing us as a society.”
“ I have no idea what is going on. And neither does anyone else.”
“…this might be the first generation where words now speak louder than actions.”
“The problem is, millennials often aren’t looking for dialogue. They’re looking for viral moments.”
“ No matter what you read, no matter how trusted the source, you must pop the hood and check out the rest of the story.”
“…small talk is killing us as a society.”
“ I have no idea what is going on. And neither does anyone else.”
“…this might be the first generation where words now speak louder than actions.”
“The problem is, millennials often aren’t looking for dialogue. They’re looking for viral moments.”
“ No matter what you read, no matter how trusted the source, you must pop the hood and check out the rest of the story.”
November 19, 2024
This is honestly not the type of book I tend to read and enjoy, but Charlamagne's thesis as stated in this book's title made me decide to page through it anyway. Buried in the vernacular of maybe a slightly different culture from my own, the same ideas as I hold lay dormant for any curious reader to uncover.
Or, are those theses? Remain honest, and also yammering endlessly can be painful?
It's not the same as when the lady from the Airplane! movie who was fluent in Jive was translating what the ill passenger needed but that it brought to mind, anyway.
It's almost the time of year to watch that movie again anyway.
I mean, I've read the Emily Post's Etiquette books and in fact have been schooled in how to give small talks through How to Win an Argument: An Ancient Guide to the Art of Persuasion and other similar Greco-Latin works but it's not the same.
Or, are those theses? Remain honest, and also yammering endlessly can be painful?
It's not the same as when the lady from the Airplane! movie who was fluent in Jive was translating what the ill passenger needed but that it brought to mind, anyway.
It's almost the time of year to watch that movie again anyway.
I mean, I've read the Emily Post's Etiquette books and in fact have been schooled in how to give small talks through How to Win an Argument: An Ancient Guide to the Art of Persuasion and other similar Greco-Latin works but it's not the same.
September 17, 2024
I admit I haven't read "Black Privilege" or "Shook one" so I'm not completely familiar with Charlamagne's story & his take on a lot of topics. Only what I've heard over the years on The Breakfast Club.
However i happened to pick uo this book after an event he was at & I will say this, Charlamagne opens up about in depth conversations that are refreshing, topics that some of us may have had amongst a small group but never on an open platform as it always seem nobody really cared about these things. From thoughts on parenting, politics, self evolution, change, social media, the fast life that lacks patience & brain run on algorithms, illusions, entitlement, idiocracy, healing, accountability & so much more, Charlamagne covers it all.
In a world that seem sucked in to small talk & small mindedness, This book Charlamagne isn't afraid to speak openly, to be transparent about his evolution and growth. If you, no matter your age, ever felt drowned in small talk, conversations that lack progress, meaning & will open up a door to change then like myself this book will make you feel less alone.
Thx Charlamagne
However i happened to pick uo this book after an event he was at & I will say this, Charlamagne opens up about in depth conversations that are refreshing, topics that some of us may have had amongst a small group but never on an open platform as it always seem nobody really cared about these things. From thoughts on parenting, politics, self evolution, change, social media, the fast life that lacks patience & brain run on algorithms, illusions, entitlement, idiocracy, healing, accountability & so much more, Charlamagne covers it all.
In a world that seem sucked in to small talk & small mindedness, This book Charlamagne isn't afraid to speak openly, to be transparent about his evolution and growth. If you, no matter your age, ever felt drowned in small talk, conversations that lack progress, meaning & will open up a door to change then like myself this book will make you feel less alone.
Thx Charlamagne
November 25, 2024
This was a recommended read and I can’t recall where at this point. But I didn’t know who the author was and had no real idea what I was getting into. I went with the audiobook because the hold was shorter and the length fit with my commuting times. I made a very wise decision, think this book worked well in audio (particularly chapter 16).
Overall I enjoyed this book and felt the author had valuable things to share. It did feel repetitive at times, the first half of the book is the strongest. The last few chapters just didn’t hit with the intended messages and I admit I upped the speed to get through faster as they didn’t engage me.
As a white female, I heard some hard things to hear but they were valuable to me. I know I’ll think about them often as I move about in the world. Charlamagne had some excellent points on politicians that I hope some of them hear and adapt their strategies but I won’t hold my breath.
I didn’t agree with everything, I felt challenged at times, and I learned a lot. I think it’s a solid book.
Overall I enjoyed this book and felt the author had valuable things to share. It did feel repetitive at times, the first half of the book is the strongest. The last few chapters just didn’t hit with the intended messages and I admit I upped the speed to get through faster as they didn’t engage me.
As a white female, I heard some hard things to hear but they were valuable to me. I know I’ll think about them often as I move about in the world. Charlamagne had some excellent points on politicians that I hope some of them hear and adapt their strategies but I won’t hold my breath.
I didn’t agree with everything, I felt challenged at times, and I learned a lot. I think it’s a solid book.
June 22, 2024
Essentially…navigate past the bullshit and focus on what matters…but it tells it in a very entertaining way…
Get Honest Or Die Lying: Why Small Talk Sucks by Charlamagne tha God is part self help book and part memoir of a media personality.
Charlamagne tha God shares his insights into the problems of politics, social media, and misleading media…along with multiple other things that take away from what’s really important and keep us from being our better selves.
Charlamagne tha God has a fun personality…one I can appreciate from his love of Judy Bloom, The Daily Show, and the Boondocks (among other things).
Along the way he also shares the troubles he’s had with his dad, relationships, breaking into the industry, and the greatest threat to human society of all…Usher (you’ll have to read that chapter to understand what I mean).
Worth checking out.
Get Honest Or Die Lying: Why Small Talk Sucks by Charlamagne tha God is part self help book and part memoir of a media personality.
Charlamagne tha God shares his insights into the problems of politics, social media, and misleading media…along with multiple other things that take away from what’s really important and keep us from being our better selves.
Charlamagne tha God has a fun personality…one I can appreciate from his love of Judy Bloom, The Daily Show, and the Boondocks (among other things).
Along the way he also shares the troubles he’s had with his dad, relationships, breaking into the industry, and the greatest threat to human society of all…Usher (you’ll have to read that chapter to understand what I mean).
Worth checking out.
April 19, 2025
Lots of memorable quotes and an exciting call to arms for real human to human engagement
Set real goals … get the F after it!
When you have true intention, some North Star you’re moving toward, you don’t have time to waste doing nothing
Having substance makes you a wave… lacking it makes you a surfer
Nothing will challenge your ego more than letting the small talk go
If you come across a post on social that’s stupid, full of lies, etc., interacting with it is a waste. Successful ppl don’t waste their time arguing online
Happy people don’t hate, and hating people aren’t happy. When someone try’s to take you down in a public setting, all they want you to do is respond. When you reply, you’re engaging with them and in doing so saying they’re on your level.
Set real goals … get the F after it!
When you have true intention, some North Star you’re moving toward, you don’t have time to waste doing nothing
Having substance makes you a wave… lacking it makes you a surfer
Nothing will challenge your ego more than letting the small talk go
If you come across a post on social that’s stupid, full of lies, etc., interacting with it is a waste. Successful ppl don’t waste their time arguing online
Happy people don’t hate, and hating people aren’t happy. When someone try’s to take you down in a public setting, all they want you to do is respond. When you reply, you’re engaging with them and in doing so saying they’re on your level.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 12, 2024
I agree when he said Modern Americans are dumb - this generation does know better yet still choose stupidity. I also like this phrase - I have no idea what is going on and neither does anyone else. People fear what they don't understand. This is so true about today - for all generations. You have to wonder what people are thinking or not thinking. Have they lost their mind and what kool aid are they drinking!
This is a book that will make you think and look at things just a little different....especially about making small talk....
This is a book that will make you think and look at things just a little different....especially about making small talk....
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