24/7 Demon Mart: Books 1-3

by D.M. Guay

One loser, one talking cockroach, and one karate-chopping bombshell are all that stand between YOU and hell on earth.

Dig into the first THREE books of the 24/7 Demon Mart series. More than 750 pages of laugh-out-loud horror comedy in one book that's chock full of zombies, Lovecraftian hell beasties, and unemployed grim reapers. Perfect for fans of Evil Dead 2 and Shaun of the Dead. Includes Book 1: The Graveyard Shift
Lloyd Wallace is the most clueless crossing guard the intersection of hell and earth has ever seen. The beer cave in the corner store where he works is the gateway to hell. The store needs a hero, but Lloyd's a zero. He still lives with his parents. He's been fired from every job he's ever had. He had no money and no prospects until he accidentally slayed a one-eyed tentacle monster hellbent on world domination. And, impressed by his pure heart and bravery, the devilish owner of the 24/7 Dairy Mart gave Lloyd a job. His coworkers—a karate-chopping bombshell and a talking roach with a bad attitude—need Lloyd's help to keep the demons in line. Can he man up and become a world-saving hero? Or will he remain a couch-surfing zero? The fate of the world is on the line. Book 2: Monster Burger
Things haven't been quite right at 24/7 Demon Mart since a handful of vengeful beasts from beyond nearly destroyed the store in a bid to unleash hell on earth. The store has a pest problem. Shoddy construction compromised the gate. Even the neighborhood is in flux, now that the Monster Burger across the street has a mysterious new owner. And Lloyd Wallace, one-time world-saving hero, is too scared to leave his house. Because zombies are real (and a valued part of the Demon Mart team). And they're restless. When human customers start shuffling around, ready to eat anything they can get their hands on, it's clear 24/7 Demon Mart has a serious zombie problem. It's up to DeeDee, Lloyd, and Kevin to save the day again, before Columbus, Ohio, turns into Zombie, Ohio. Angel Trouble
The grim reaper's lost his job. He's been stripped of his scythe and banned from reaping. The angel of death has officially fallen. And he crash-landed at 24/7 Demon Mart. Lloyd, Kevin, and DeeDee soon find that living with the angel of death isn't easy. Lost souls. Angry exes. Ancient curses. Will the grim reaper ever get his afterlife together? The outlook is not so good. The reaper isn't the only angel who's out of sorts. Lloyd's devilish boss Faust's love life is off track, and Angel eight ball is having a hell of a time juggling a terrible new boss while saving Lloyd from eternal damnation. As unreaped souls stack up and the specter of death looms larger, what's the Demon Mart crew to do?
Welcome to 24/7 Demon Mart, the horror-comedy series for fans of A. Lee Martinez (Gil's All-fright Diner), Jason Pargin / (John Dies at the End), Rick Gualtieri (Bill the Vampire/ Tome of Bill), and Christopher Moore (Practical Demonkeeping). Also available in ebook and audiobook editions. 24/7 Demon Mart (Main series)
The Graveyard A Horror Comedy (Book 1)
Monster This one has zombies in it (Book 2)
Angel A grim reaper comedy (Book 3)
(Re) A demon horror comedy (Book 4)
Revenge of the A vampires vs werewolves comedy (Book 5)
(Dis) MORE witches! (Book 6-coming soon) 24/7 Demon Mart Stories
Hell for the A 24/7 Demon Mart Christmas Special
Critters from the Poo A 24/7 Demon Mart Creature Feature 24/7 Demon Mart Short Reads
Kevin vs The Mothman
Kevin vs The Loveland Frogs
Kevin vs Lloyd

Genres: Horror

774 pages, Paperback

Published August 15, 2023

About the author

DM Guay is a horror fan who mish-mashes her love of all that's scary/gory/geeky/funny into stories about creeps and critters, ghouls and ghosts, and all of the unseemly things that go bump in the night.

Denise lives in Ohio with her 12-foot skeletons. She gives out full-size candy bars on Halloween. She is a stage four kidney cancer surviver (It was bleak. Seriously.), so she donates some of her royalties to the Kidney Cancer Research Alliance. (KCCURE. ORG)

She also runs "Monsters In Your Inbox" a monthly round-up of B-horror movies, horror comedy books, and weird news.

Website: http://dmguay.com
Direct Store: https://payhip.com/authordmguay
Books on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/~/e/B06XVFZ2X2
FB:https://www.facebook.com/DMGuay

Reviews

[Biblio · Rating 4 out of 5]

Perfect fun short horror stories with wild characters and playful banter. This gives you all the 90’s horror vibes. Honestly this should be a animated adult series because I would definitely watch Lloyd on his wild adventures at Demon Mart and being a bouncer for a hell portal. Great short read, great for spooky season and year round. Super fun!

[David Ketelsen · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an advance review copy from BookSirens.

I'm giving these books 4-stars because they're kinda addictive. Personally I think it's largely because DeeDee is so hot and kickass. It's certainly not the giant cockroach Kevin or the main character Lloyd Wallace, who's a fat loser that still lives with his mother, surrounded by dirty laundry and empty snack food bags. *shudder* In any case, these are the first 3 books in the Demon Mart (aka Dairy Mart) series which chronicles Lloyd's experiences with supernatural entities and powers while finding purpose in his up-to-then pathetic life. All I can say is better him than us!

Seriously, Guay's quirky approach to life on Earth and the sometimes ominous hints to what comes next are compelling and very entertaining. Devils, demons, angels, odd werewolves, zombies, intelligent insects, and peculiar denizens of other dimensions come and go in these 3 books and the world is richer as a result. Guay's pitches for some her favorite things like Zapp's chips (they are great--at least the Voodoo flavor is) and myriad New Orleans local bands are creative though I don't understand her disdain for Kiss's song Beth. LOL The "Book Sausage" that ends each book is seriously amusing as Guay adds a little insight into why she writes what she does.

I like the first book the most, it's classic, and the third is almost as good. I found the 2nd book with its Monster Burger dilemma less approachable, but if you're into zombies it'll probably be your favorite of the 3 books. It's a good lesson into why you shouldn't cross a rich soccer mom. The third book revolves around a grim reaper named Zack who reacts to unemployment with a lot of tears and recriminations. The Demon Mart gang jumps on the case to get his job back though it's anything but a direct route. Zack is a very endearing character and really needs his own series. Hint, hint!

[Toni · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Graveyard Shift
Lloyd Wallace is a loser. He lives at home with his mother, he is over the head in debt to his mom, the cable company, and ex girlfriend and student loans. One night he heads to a not so good area of Columbus,Ohio to get a slushy and eye the gorgeous woman working there. Only tonight is straight out weird. He finds himself fighting a monster. Then he gets hired by a devil and he discovers hell is real. Is he doomed to hell? Will he ever get himself together to make something of his life? Better yet what does he have to do to get himself fired!!!???

Monster Burger
Today is so not going great and he isn't even up yet! Mom thinks he's a drug dealer. His angel eight ball is harping on him to start working out after all he made a deal with the Big Man. Then the owner of the Monster Burger place dies. It's reopened and is being run by Earl who worked there before. Only the food tastes different. Zombies start showing up. What's going on? How did the zombie apocalypse begin without them knowing?

Angel Trouble
Oh great! the grim reaper just walked in!! Between Faust, the girl scout cookies and now the grim reaper...Lloyd 's life isn't looking too healthy right now. Hmmm has it ever since he started working here??? Then the unemployed reaper stomps on Kevin. Life has just gotten more weird.
Will Lloyd be ok? Can he keep his sanity? It's even worse---he has to work out!!!!!

Be prepared to laugh out loud and roll on the floor with this series.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Alexia McCabe · Rating 3 out of 5]

I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

I decided to read this omnibus because it was described as "Clerks meets Evil Dead 2." In that respect, these books do not disappoint. However, for me personally, they leaned a little heavily on lewd humor.

These three books follow protagonist, nobody, and complete loser Lloyd Lamb Wallace as he tries to survive his new job working night shift at the 24/7 Dairy Mart; a convenience store with so many slushy flavors that anyone would get choice paralysis looking at them.

The books are written in 3rd person, following Lloyd's perspective. This is unfortunate. He is easily the least interesting character in these books. He spends most of his time feeling sorry for him, and blaming everyone else for the things that have gone wrong in his life. He somehow manages to fail into the correct answer, or be in the right place to help save the world multiple times.

I do believe there is an audience for these books, the writing isn't bad, the stories are relatively interesting and most of the characters are, if not likable, at least entertaining. I gave it three stars, because it doesn't align with my particular reading interests.

[Emily (em.reads.bo0ks) · Rating 4 out of 5]

*3.5 stars, but rounding up to 4*

The first book, The Graveyard Shift, was very enjoyable. I was constantly laughing, and unable to put the book down. The characters were hilarious and were very well brought to life and unordinary. The second book, Monster Burger, felt very repetitive. It was harder for me to push through this one. I still found some parts of it funny. The third book, Angel Trouble, was hard for me to push through as well. I think while reading the second book that I started to lose interest, but continued to push through.

I was expecting more on the horror scale than what these books had. And I enjoy going into my books blindly, so I don’t pay attention to others reviews to see what they think. The horror aspect of the books seemed more childish, with wacky characters (which were very interesting!). The humor aspect of the book was good, and I think The Graveyard Shift was the most hilarious and interesting to read!

I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Heather · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’m 1/3 through this book and still working my way through it. Will update this review when I’m finished but with the way the author has set things up I don’t see much changing my review and the story has a rinse and repeat element to it. I find the base story interesting. The paranormal, creepy, and otherwordly intrigues me, so I’m enjoying that aspect of the book.

However… the main character of this book, Lloyd is so intolerable to listen to, his inner dialogue should be a sin. A 21 year old who has has the most immature inner dialogue ( like a 16 year old male going through puberty who’s oblivious to the world around him). The amount of the inner dialogue could have been reduced to 1/2 and it would do the story a favor.

I almost couldn’t get into this… but the world he’s in pulls you in.. so it’s a hate/love read right now. It’s entertaining but I don’t think I could recommend it.

I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[LJ Henley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lloyd was just riding his bike to the Dairy Mart to get his favorite slushy when things started getting strange. In these three books the reader is taken on a fun reading ride! The Dairy Mart turns into the Demon Mart after midnight. Demons of all sorts go in and out its doors and have to be back by sunrise. In each book we have Dee Dee, the goth, good looking babe, Kevin, the manager who just happens to be a roach, and of course, Lloyd, the new guy who never reads the employee handbook. He goes about life, just barely does what he has to, to exist.

I am not one to read horror books, but I was attracted to the humor that was the introduction to the book. D M Guay is a really talented, warped writer with a fun sense of humor. I was hooked by the end of the first chapter! Now I can't wait to read more about Lloyd's adventures at the Demon Mart!.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Angel Dey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Stories are fun

Up until the end of book 3, there really isn’t a lot to like about Lloyd as a protagonist. He is just so very dumb. Annoyingly dumb. We are constantly reminded of how he is such a failure, but I feel like there should be some kind of redeeming qualities about him that make us want to root for him since he’s the protagonist and allegedly the hero. And until the very end of book 3, I didn’t see any reason to like him.

That said, however, the books are fun to read and a nice escape for a while. The mystery of who the “bad guy” is in book 3 was kind of obvious, but the rest I didn’t see coming.

And as far as not liking Lloyd, well, at the end of book 3, he finally sees the light, so to speak. He finally earns a little bit of redemption in my eyes. And I do want to see him continue his hero’s journey. I will be reading the next book in the series.

[Michel McDonald · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very Fun and addictive story

I got this in a free Goodreads giveaway. I just finished reading it and OMG this was a really good book. Well, 3 good books. In my mind as I was reading I was picturing everything as a cartoon. That's never happened to me before. I had voices of characters from shows I've seen on tv. It just made more sense that those characters had those voices. This really should be made into a cartoon series because it's a really good story. Anyway, I'm a fan and I bought the next 2 books that are in this series, and I'm going to buy the rest of the books and I'm going to read them soon. Thank you for the free book.

[Puisan · Rating 5 out of 5]

No matter how bad life gets, how if you’re just having a bad day….think of Lloyd Wallace….and somehow things don’t seem that bad anymore! This book was funny AF and had my literally laughing as I read through Lloyd’s adventure (or misadventure to be exact) a he fumbled his way as an unwitting and unwilling employer for the Hellhole portal (otherwise known as the Dairy Mart to you mere mortals). The storyline was quick paced and the adventure begins from the very get go. You’ll be glued to this book until the very end! A definite must read, IMO!.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Missy Perna · Rating 5 out of 5]

Horror Comedy is the Junk food of my Soul

This is my first time reading the books of D.M.Guay .... And it will not be my last!
I spent my weeks vacation reading 24/7 Demon Mat Books 1-3 and enjoyed every moment giggling and reminiscing through my horror genre filled brain of my movie fan girl teenage self. I felt like I was reading a love letter to all the movies I watched in The 80's and 90's.. Entertaining characters, fun setting, nonstop action. I wish I could share the movie in my head.
If you are a fan of Evil Dead, giant monster movies, possession and junk food. This is the series to check out!

[Joan Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thank You D.M Guay and BookSirens

This novel is a fun comical speculative adventure. The graveyard shift at the Demon Mart is never dull or boring. Once a night, a Demon or more try to escape hell to wreck havoc in the Real World. This novel tells about a typical night in the seedy neighborhood convenient store.

The novel will have you laughing from beginning to end. I would love to see this turn into an anime or a live action movie. It as a strong vibe of Ash Williams typical shift at SMart.

It stresses the importance of reading the Employee Manual and the consequences for not reading it. It stresses what happens when you make a deal with God or the Devil.

Speculative Fiction
Comedy Horror
Graphic/ Adult Content
Trigger Points

[tburbr · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 Stars

This was a great boxed set filled with the first three books of a series that will keep you coming back for more. The character work and story line of each book were well written. There are several laugh out loud moments.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Summer Steelman · Rating 5 out of 5]

So good! I just couldn't stop reading and when I was done, was really hoping there was more. Guay did not disappoint!.

I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and am voluntarily leaving a review.

[Becca · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series just made my day. Heck...my week. It was so fun, full of hilarious situations, such good plot lines, scary moments, and much more. It's got about everything you want in a book and I can wait to see what's next. I love this series so much!

[Caitlin Bryant · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5 stars.

I actually loved this series, it was so funny but also at times heartfelt? Now the writing isn’t the best I’ve read and the crying constantly really bugged me but it was still funny. I would read the next ones in the series if I get a chance

[Brian Mcclain · Rating 4 out of 5]

A rollicking good horror comedy and relatively epic in scope as the omnibus.

I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Brittany Hayes · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was a fun read in between my other things. Highly recommended this series!

[Margarita Rose · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hell of a read. Light comedic characters and laughs throughout the books. Really enjoyed the books and series. Pee your pants funny.

[Jada Broderick · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a great laugh and adventure. I look forward to purchasing the set . thank you for the opportunity to read this. 🤘😈

Definitely in my top 5 of the year

[GiGi · Rating 3 out of 5]

LMAO, this was a mess and a half, but in a fun way. Book 3 even managed to tug at my heart strings.
Character growth? Yes, please!

[Ky · Rating 4 out of 5]

Absolutely loved this collection, I found these books to be hilarious, engaging and overall super fun. I loved the cast, Kevin being my favourite character in this world so far.

Lloyd I had some troubles connecting with, he’s the typical “dumb young man” concept, and although I found him endearing most of the time- he annoyed the crap out of me. I will absolutely continue with the rest of the books. I enjoyed the first one the best out of these three, but I know there’s more to come and I'm here for the adventure!

I received this ARC free from Booksirens- and the author directly. I’m leaving my review voluntarily and happily!