Oh boy did this book make me feel many things. The way my thoughts on some stuff did a huge flip... and lets just say mostly bad.
This was by far the weakest finale of any of Cassie's series. Im sorry but after waiting literally 2 years to get a book like this? Ive been a fan of Cassie's for almost 7 years and never have I been this angry and disappointed over her books. In the end I found my fav parts outweighed the so many things that were wrong with this book but my god💀 this pointless drama can only work for so long before it gets ridiculously frustrating and a character death was done SO dirty like Im genuinely mad at Cassie because what even??? It's just plain emotionless and cruel. It's so messed up and there was no reason. You can SO tell that Cassie only killed off that character because she needed to kill someone, just for shock factor because I swear that was such a lazy way to kill off someone. THE PARENTS OF THEM MOURNING WASNT EVEN ON PAGE JUST WHAT EVEN. The friends of that character didnt even properly mourn him except for 2 ??? This is just pure laziness. The lazy writing is horrid. And I KNOW Cassie knows how to write well written deaths and aftermaths because she did so in QOAAD, City of Glass, and Clockwork Princess?? What happened to that?? How can you have 50% of the book be an unnecessary love triangle drama but not include something as crucial as the characters mourning someone they love dearly? It's as if they didnt even exist !! Intermission: grief was such a scam, what shouldve been about the death of one character was mostly overshadowed by two others ALIVE and just... where is the mourning and grief? The coping over someone very close who just DIED. That character so did not deserve this horrible horrible writing. Done so dirty.
Like with any death Cassie's written so far it's been me sad crying but it worked as a death... THIS??? I was angry sad devastated crying and now its rage complete wth moment and I wont lie but along with the love triangle drama going on for 50% of the book (so dumb cant get over it-- at least with QOAAD there was actual plot going over it and not unnecessary stupid drama. And here's the thing TLH is literally drama and I loved that! But COT just took it too far) and this death (#1 reason honestly!) are the main reasons Im giving this 3 star… not less because in the end I did enjoy seeing some of my favs. And even the ending was so underwhelming… honestly a really huge part of me wants to give this 2 stars but I cant bring myself to because despite all my complaints I will be listing, the only thing saving this book from 2 stars is my love for the Shadowhunter world and how deep that connection is having been a fan for so long. The nostalgia I have is whats saving this book.
yall i was in an emotional state (as you can see) writing this review so excuse the messiness. also major spoilers below
Now with characters... first up is Cordelia!! I remember a time where I loved her to the point of death and now I truly couldnt stand her for 50% of the book (even after that I truly could not care about her anymore) Im sorry what happened? She felt so out of character for one thing I could not believe the things she was saying and doing this isnt the Cordelia I know. I of course understand that there was so much going on her mind but still doesnt excuse the harsh words she had said to Lucie. I cannot get that out of my mind the way she made her cry… had she just said it because of her being a paladin that they shouldnt be parabatai I wouldve understood but the way she was so unfair towards Lucie and even made “living in stories” an insult towards her??? Frankly, Cordelia annoyed me most of the time.
“I could never hate you, for all my hate is reserved for myself. I have none left over for anyone else."
And James!! I love James so much, him having to come to terms with what he's gone through, the trauma and everything he's missed out on being under the enchantment? Absolutely devastating, I wanted to cry. But truly Cassie did not need 400 pages of drama with that love triangle🤩 I felt SO bad for James with all that pain he had to go through every time he thought of the gracelet and how since he was 14 he's only been half-alive. The trauma and how James said he only has hatred towards himself SOBBING Tatiana deserved worse than what she got. But still I will never understand the need for why Cassie had to add the love triangle... we did not need that pain for James and drama for 400 pages and a pointless love triangle (of all things) just really?
Also it's sad but I came to realize halfway through the book that herondaisy has lost its appeal for me. Like truly Im happy that theyre happy but no joke their whole relationship... they just seemed more physically attracted to each other here rather than actually emotionally in love? In COG and COI they had so much more precious and wholesome scenes than in COT...
And Matthew!! Haha did I really say I loved him and didnt want him to die back when I read COI?? Well let me take that back. On rereading the first two books I noticed things I didnt like about Matthew and one thing especially that bothered me is what kind of parabatai do you have to be to go run off to Paris with your parabatai's wife??? Especially when she’s emotionally distraught like there was NO thinking going there. Just what?? Literally no parabatai from the other series would ever do that?? And him lying to Cordelia during Paris that he would not drink yet all he did was drink secretly and lie to Cordelia's face? What the hell????? Of course I understand withdrawal is horrible but the lying? Not cool at all. Also idk about you but if I accidently killed the child whom my mother was pregnant with... I would not keep it from my family and everyone I loved??? It's not even just to save myself from guilt of keeping it a secret but how can anyone just keep a secret like that from their mother who mourns the loss of the child they never had and who would believe they would never be able to have another again? Charlotte of all people had a right to know what happened to her baby and Matthew keeping it secret had no right.
Anyways, the beginning of COT Matthew annoyed me to no end also so🤩 (I would have Matthew die instead of Christopher in a HEARTBEAT) and something else... after Matthew's drinking being such an important aspect of the story, you're telling me it's glossed over so quickly when he tells Charlotte and Henry? I dont know about you but something like that shouldve been given more time and consideration as its own scene. What the actual hell Cassie.
Something I will say that I loved to see happen though was the way Matthew's arc towards healing was handled. When James told him
"Remember that your sin is your silence, not what you did."
--LIKE LITERALLY FINALLY SOMEONE SAYS IT TO HIM. I love how Christopher came up with the perfect treatment for him (yet another reason to love Christopher sm??) and with the support of all his friends, Matthew was able to slowly get on a path of recovery. Despite my dislike of Matthew, it was very heartwarming to see honestly and such an emotional moment especially seeing how easily it could have taken a dark turn like Elias's end had he not gotten the help he needed. I do still stand by that Matthew is quite annoying, but I dont hate him completely. Im glad Cassie didnt give him a love interest (love triangle doesnt count he didnt really love Cordelia) and focused more on his alcoholism problem and his healing.
Anna and Ariadne were just... there. I really do not have much of an opinion on either of them and truly could care less about their fates had they died. Anna is such a queen and Ari's arc was really nice but that's it.
Now for the people I absolutely adored!! Grace, Lucie, Christopher, Thomas, and Alastair!! My loves!!
"I suppose. I have always thought everyone deserves a second chance. We are each given only one life. We cannot get another one. We must live with the mistakes we have made."
Im going to be blunt. To the people who still hate Grace AND think she deserves every sort of misery this world has to offer, literally get over yourself. Learn what morally gray means and then come back. You can hate Grace if you want just because despite everything youve read about her (altho i wouldnt understand), you can’t get over what she did but seriously otherwise, it's obvious that you just hate people who have been abused and think it's their fault that they were abused. That's literally what it means. Nobody is asking you to forgive or forget all that Grace has done (rightfully so, it cant be something anyone can forgive) but to still go after her like she's a demon spawn?? I find it ironic that I've seen more hatred towards Tatiana than Grace... hmm I wonder what that says about some people.
Anyways !! Grace !! Such a complex character I literally adore this girl. Her hatred towards herself pains me, the need and want to do better and be a better person omg I was cheering for her. To have finally come across warmth and kindness from someone... I want to cry Christopher was truly everything to her. Grace's arc couldve been done so much better but alas it was expected that Cassie wouldnt really do it justice… it truly felt like Cassie only wanted her for her to be the one to get the fire messages to work and just😐
“But Grace, I have never blamed you for your mother before. I will not start now. She was vile. But you are not vile. You have done wrong, but you are trying to make it right. And such trying is not easy.”
SEEING THE GRACETOPHER MOMENTS ohmygod they just gave me so much life - which is also another reason why I felt SO robbed when Cassie just kills off Christopher??? like what the hell you really pulled that??? an absolute menace I could kill something. Their scenes were what I was looking forward to most from COT and they served so well😭😭 Christopher was the most understanding and reasonable person of everyone in this book I swear. and Grace being able for the first time to be treated with so much kindness by Christopher? yall HE LITERALLY CHOSE TO VISIT HER IN THE SILENT CITY TO HAVE THEIR OWN XMAS PARTY WITH CHAMPAGNE THEN GO TO WILL'S CHRISTMAS PARTY BECAUSE HE DIDNT WANT HER TO BE ALONE??? IF THAT DOESNT SAY ANYTHING ABOUT HOW WHOLESOME THEIR RELATIONSHIP WAS THEN IDK WHAT IS.
“She felt the ache inside her like pain, the loss of Christopher. Who had understood her, and not judged her.”
The worst part is that literally it didnt even cross my mind that Kit could be killed off?? I CANT WRAP MY HEAD AROUND IT yet of course I shouldve seen it coming.. No I lie I did not see it coming because in what world would it make sense. Yes, they needed only one lightwood from Cecily's side to live in order for the Lightwood line to live on so Alexander is still there BUT KIT?? THE MOST PRECIOUS BALL OF SUNSHINE ??? The only one who could actually see past someone and understand them so well... Grace's only friend who even knowing what she did, he didnt abandon her nor coddle her but gave her advice and spoke of her making up for her mistakes... the only one who was just like Grace in having a scientific mind AND YOU KILL HIM??? GARCETOPHER POSSIBILITY JUST ERADICATED LIKE THAT? I hate you Cassie like I am genuinely upset and am not saying this as in I hate her but still love her like I hate her for doing this literally how heartless do you have to be. And what makes it even worse is that we see none of the merry thieves and co mourning except for Thomas??? EVEN GRACE WHO ONLY KNEW KIT FOR A FEW WEEKS MOURNED MORE AND HAD MORE CLOSURE WITH KIT THAN THE OTHERS. That laboratory scene after his death had me sobbing ohmygod. But then there was everyone else... It's like they were all like "oh no!! Anyways..." and I hate Cassie so much for that. How could we even not see Gabriel and Cecily find out about Kit's death? What is this world we live in? At the very least (but not enough), why are we told that Will and Tessa cry over Lucie and James being stuck in London but no word at all from Cecily and Gabriel’s reactions??? JUST HUH
"Something brushed against her temple, tucking her hair behind her ear. A ghostly touch, a goodbye. A moment later, she knew he was gone.”
Yes, Im forever mourning what couldve been. I wouldve even been dead happy had they become best friends like😭 Cassie hates the Lightwoods confirmed
"You told me once you dont believe in endings, happy or otherwise. Is that still true?"
"Of course. We have so much yet ahead--good, bad, and everything else. I believe this is our happy middle. Don't you?"
LUCIE OMG Lucie deserved so much more than being thrown to the side. She's literally amazing I adore her so much??? Her character is so unique but also just the feats she's accomplished!! Not only bringing back Jesse to life but also they literally would have all died at the Institute when Tatiana encountered them had it not been Lucie's power of bringing Rupert's spirit to the battlefield. Rupert dissing Tatiana was hilarious as hell. Grace telling Lucie to use her power and Lucie using her power they were truly the mvps !! OH and then when Lucie had figured out what to do to make the Watchers in the final battle fall and free the spirits of those bodies !! Literal queen I swear. Also can I just say that Cordelia landing the final blow on Tatiana was so... meh. Like why Cordelia? If anything Grace shouldve been the one to murder Tatiana it wouldve been so fitting after everything Tatiana has done to her. She’s suffered the most at Tatiana’s hand, so Cordelia stealing that kill sucks. I honestly dont think I'll ever get over the way Lucie was pretty much overlooked especially with the potential her character had had she gotten more page time. Even though nobody in the book noticed the things she did, Jesse, Grace and I noticed so <3
"I am alive because of you, but not only because you commanded me to live. I am alive because my life has you in it."
Which also brings me to Jesse. Jesse had SO much potential as well to become a fav but again, he was also sidelined with Lucie. Their relationship was pretty much not given as much attention as the others, even though it's literally the most healthy and precious one, there were no lies ever between them, only trust and love and adorable moments <3 I need more luciejesse content in future novellas.
"Attitudes towards her brother had changed, but even more than that, he had changed. [...] Alastair now seemed to feel free to express the love and affection for his friends and family he had always tamped down and hidden away."
I SOBBED. Of everyone in this series, Alastair Carstairs remains my #1 favourite TLH character. The way he’s changed so much just thinking of it gets me emotional. He learned to accept himself and believe he’s deserving of love. For so long he’s hated himself and so for this journey of his self-hatred to turn into self-love.. I cannot deal with the emotions, Im beyond happy. HIM EASILY BEING ABLE TO EXPRESS HIS LOVE WITHOUT A CARE IN THE WORLD STOP MY HEART CANT HANDLE THIS. Thomastair was really the only ship Id say that was done justice out of everyone in this series. The half-burnt fire message was hilarious bye
“Dear Alastair, Why are you so stupid I brush my teeth Don’t tell anyone, Thomas.”
that will never not be funny. Alastair taking care of little Zachary Arash Carstairs sdkhgks it's adorable, Alastair now always smiling makes my heart melt🫠
Also I truly do not understand how Lucie and Cordelia went through becoming parabatai because truly if we are all being honest--from the content we’ve had of the two, it doesnt make sense, it shouldn't have happened. Literally we were told so much about Cordelia and Lucie's deep friendship but this whole series actually has not shown that. They were actually distant and even in a fight more than they actually had friendship goals - it was only within the last 200 pages that we saw how much their friendship couldve been my fav had it not appeared so late in the series... and that's such a missed opportunity. Hell Anna and Cordelia had a more real and sweet friendship than Cordelia and Lucie. And Grace and Lucie could’ve had their own friendship. I could see the potential in COI - of course, that was destroyed once Lucie found out what Grace did, which is fair, but it doesnt change the potential there.
Really the only two-person non-romantic relationship that was built and developed SO PERFECTLY is Cordelia and Alastair's sibling relationship. It's messy, honest, protective, deep, funny and literally everything like my heart is filled with love. When Cordelia said to Alastair,
"I am not sure we choose who we love. I rather think love is something like a book written just for us, a sort of holy text it is given to us to interpret. And you are refusing to read yours."
JUST MY HEART how far their relationship has come <3
Otherwise, just what happened I dont understand how Cassie could mess up THIS badly? The disappointment I feel is immeasurable. I feel betrayed. Never have I hated so many things that occurred in any of her books. I thought I could trust her and she's betrayed that. I dont even know what to think anymore. I feel the need to reread my favs books of Cassie's now in order to remind myself why I love her books but otherwise... what was looking to be my 2nd fav series in TSC made such a dark turn. You dont understand I want to cry for eternity I hate this I was so excited. I literally am starting to tear up because of how I mourn the potential this series has. Cassie has made me going from loving TLH with everything I have to just feeling miserable and bitter towards COT this breaks me the most.
Oh oh one more thing: the reason why the family tree is inaccurate has to be the dumbest excuse I have ever seen in my life, like really? I promise you Cassie couldve come up with something better but you're telling me it's all because of this random side character who just wrote inaccurate info for the sake of it? *Esme creating a family tree based on thinking of ppl who are alive are dead, and dead are alive, deciding herself who is going to marry who and die when* JUST HUH🤡 You’re telling me a lunatic just decided to create a family tree? Talk about a lousy excuse.
DAMMIT I HAD MORE TO SAY BUT HAD TO CUT DOWN BC OF THE WORD LIMIT. I must stop but this is so the biggest plot twist of 2023 for me. Disappointed forever.
Now Cassie give us the original ending, it couldnt have been as bad as this.