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Daniel "Nuke" Nuka is a hot mess. He hates his day job, he routinely overdrafts his checking account, and he can't remember the last time he ate a vegetable. The one reliable bright spot? His best buddy Lee. Sure, Lee's uptight and finicky and he has that weird thing about using coasters, but he also has Nuke's back.
Lee Hapsburg III is not a hot mess—or at least that's what he tells himself. He has a promising future at his law firm, a flourishing stock portfolio, and...a secret fetish that's always made sex a land mine of stress and shame. Lee's been hiding his kink for so long that when Nuke stumbles across the evidence, his first reaction is panic.
Nuke is admittedly repelled by Lee's fetish, but it's become habit by now to take care of his buddy. So he makes an offer that will turn their friendship—and their lives—into one big hot mess.
Lee Hapsburg III is not a hot mess—or at least that's what he tells himself. He has a promising future at his law firm, a flourishing stock portfolio, and...a secret fetish that's always made sex a land mine of stress and shame. Lee's been hiding his kink for so long that when Nuke stumbles across the evidence, his first reaction is panic.
Nuke is admittedly repelled by Lee's fetish, but it's become habit by now to take care of his buddy. So he makes an offer that will turn their friendship—and their lives—into one big hot mess.
ebook
Published April 18, 2023
About the author
Sidney Bell
8 books428 followersSidney Bell lives in the drizzly Pacific Northwest with her amazingly supportive husband. She received her MFA degree in Creative Writing in 2010, considered aiming for the Great American Novel, and then promptly started writing fanfiction instead. Eventually more realistic grown-ups convinced her to try writing something more fiscally responsible, which is how we ended up here.
When she’s not writing, she’s playing violent video games, yelling at the television during hockey games, or supporting her local library by turning books in late.
When she’s not writing, she’s playing violent video games, yelling at the television during hockey games, or supporting her local library by turning books in late.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 63 reviews
October 4, 2023
I would have tagged this "surprise goodness," except that because the author is Sidney Bell I was not remotely surprised by the goodness.
On the most straightforward level, a best-friends-to-lovers romance in which one of the MCs has a pisskink that the other one indulges, with the inevitable romance-plot miscommunications about feelings and intentions. On a less obvious level, an absolutely beautiful story about disgust and shame giving way to acceptance and pleasure, about how giving pleasure can itself be a source of pleasure, and about how two people's strengths can complement each other. (For once, an epilogue that didn't strike me as forced or gooey.)
I got this during the last Smashwords sale, but checked out the Amazon buy link and of course this book is either buried in the search results or not available there. You know what to do.
On the most straightforward level, a best-friends-to-lovers romance in which one of the MCs has a pisskink that the other one indulges, with the inevitable romance-plot miscommunications about feelings and intentions. On a less obvious level, an absolutely beautiful story about disgust and shame giving way to acceptance and pleasure, about how giving pleasure can itself be a source of pleasure, and about how two people's strengths can complement each other. (For once, an epilogue that didn't strike me as forced or gooey.)
I got this during the last Smashwords sale, but checked out the Amazon buy link and of course this book is either buried in the search results or not available there. You know what to do.
December 29, 2023
oh my, this really just charmed me!! it’s so gross how much i was cheesing throughout the book, they’re just so fucking cute. i love how different nuke and lee are. nuke is such a sweet dummy, i actually love that he doesn’t try hard at life, he’s just chillin, easy peasy like. and lee is so baby girl, he’s my touch starved, rigid, considerate little grumpy muffin, but of course he’s a little less rigid with nuke:
“Lee never gets stiff with him. It's something that belongs to Nuke, Lee's willingness to be touched.”
brb screaming into my pillow rn😩😩😩
when nuke texts his brother for help with lee bc they’re fighting, saying: “I think we want different things and it sucks” (referring to how nuke wants to kiss all over lee, and he doesn’t think lee wants more) to which his brother responds: “That’s weird he seems like the marriage type” be he assumes they’re already a couple and will grow old together like it’s been a known fact……SCREAMMMMM
and nuke, the goofball, TRIES HARD and writes a fucking whole ass script before trying to ask lee out, complete with rebuttals for how lee’s gonna try to argue back bc he KNOWS lee THAT well, he’s already got his comebacks planned out….IM CRYING it’s just so cute🥹🥹🥹
i also love how nuke reminds us at all times that lee is terrible at sucking cock:
“It's like no blow job Nuke's ever had, almost incompetent in the technical sense, utterly lacking in finesse. There's more than the occasional hint of teeth, which is terrifying.”💀💀
i mean nuke fucking loves it bc it’s LEE and enthusiasm and passion is sexy, but it’s fucking hilarious when nuke’s all like:
“One day, he's going to take his time, show Lee what a blow job can be, show off what actual technique looks like.”💀💀
that’s just so fucking funny to me, nuke’s like ima always keep it a buck no matter what🤣
mad cute for a book centering around piss kink….although, i wish the kink and sex was more fleshed out, and we get to see more of them sweetly figuring each other out. i needed that BAD, esp since we get a hefty chunk of the book where they’re miscommunicating idiots and not really speaking, tensions high, but still having their scheduled sunday piss/bj, making it have a sort of rote coldness to it that i didn’t like. i refuse to believe these cuties would be anything but warm and fuzzy. plus once the confessions are made, the sex is practically off page, which is a bummer, and i think the story would have benefitted from progressing to a more intimate and sensual exploration of the kink and sex.
ugh but i just love that nuke gives lee the consideration and support needed to grow from a place of shame to a place of acceptance with his needs, even if nuke doesn’t really understand the kink.
so even tho i have aggravations, i’m still gonna give it 4 stars. btw it’s $0.99 on smashwords rn
“Lee never gets stiff with him. It's something that belongs to Nuke, Lee's willingness to be touched.”
brb screaming into my pillow rn😩😩😩
when nuke texts his brother for help with lee bc they’re fighting, saying: “I think we want different things and it sucks” (referring to how nuke wants to kiss all over lee, and he doesn’t think lee wants more) to which his brother responds: “That’s weird he seems like the marriage type” be he assumes they’re already a couple and will grow old together like it’s been a known fact……SCREAMMMMM
and nuke, the goofball, TRIES HARD and writes a fucking whole ass script before trying to ask lee out, complete with rebuttals for how lee’s gonna try to argue back bc he KNOWS lee THAT well, he’s already got his comebacks planned out….IM CRYING it’s just so cute🥹🥹🥹
i also love how nuke reminds us at all times that lee is terrible at sucking cock:
“It's like no blow job Nuke's ever had, almost incompetent in the technical sense, utterly lacking in finesse. There's more than the occasional hint of teeth, which is terrifying.”💀💀
i mean nuke fucking loves it bc it’s LEE and enthusiasm and passion is sexy, but it’s fucking hilarious when nuke’s all like:
“One day, he's going to take his time, show Lee what a blow job can be, show off what actual technique looks like.”💀💀
that’s just so fucking funny to me, nuke’s like ima always keep it a buck no matter what🤣
mad cute for a book centering around piss kink….although, i wish the kink and sex was more fleshed out, and we get to see more of them sweetly figuring each other out. i needed that BAD, esp since we get a hefty chunk of the book where they’re miscommunicating idiots and not really speaking, tensions high, but still having their scheduled sunday piss/bj, making it have a sort of rote coldness to it that i didn’t like. i refuse to believe these cuties would be anything but warm and fuzzy. plus once the confessions are made, the sex is practically off page, which is a bummer, and i think the story would have benefitted from progressing to a more intimate and sensual exploration of the kink and sex.
ugh but i just love that nuke gives lee the consideration and support needed to grow from a place of shame to a place of acceptance with his needs, even if nuke doesn’t really understand the kink.
so even tho i have aggravations, i’m still gonna give it 4 stars. btw it’s $0.99 on smashwords rn
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
January 24, 2024
RTC when I can pull my jaw off the floor!
Gobsmacked.
Gobsmacked.
October 16, 2023
5 stars
I absolutely adore a story about someone doing something for a person they care for even if it isn't their thing. The acceptance and love behind that is staggering to me; look at me over here getting teary-eyed about one character peeing on the other.
It's wonderful and kink positive but also shows an unfortunate truth of how many people perceive piss kink. "Gross" - Nuke says it almost involuntarily.
I loved their journey together, and I think this was most effective told only from Nuke's POV (not the MC with the piss kink) because it doesn't sink in until the very end how all-encompassing Lee's shame about his desires is, and how deeply it's affected his life.
I also particularly appreciated the disconnect that Nuke initially had where he didn’t equate the pissing with a sex act and, oh boy, the angst of it all at the realisation.
This had big feels for a small book and the agony was beautiful. BEAUTIFUL.
On a more practical note, the writing took a bit of getting used to. It's 3rd person present and the story meanders a bit at first with a scene in the present then a flashback to how they met. But then the prose is sharp and witty and I really grew to enjoy it.
Many thanks to ancientreader for bringing this novella and this author to my attention!
I absolutely adore a story about someone doing something for a person they care for even if it isn't their thing. The acceptance and love behind that is staggering to me; look at me over here getting teary-eyed about one character peeing on the other.
It's wonderful and kink positive but also shows an unfortunate truth of how many people perceive piss kink. "Gross" - Nuke says it almost involuntarily.
I loved their journey together, and I think this was most effective told only from Nuke's POV (not the MC with the piss kink) because it doesn't sink in until the very end how all-encompassing Lee's shame about his desires is, and how deeply it's affected his life.
I also particularly appreciated the disconnect that Nuke initially had where he didn’t equate the pissing with a sex act and, oh boy, the angst of it all at the realisation.
This had big feels for a small book and the agony was beautiful. BEAUTIFUL.
On a more practical note, the writing took a bit of getting used to. It's 3rd person present and the story meanders a bit at first with a scene in the present then a flashback to how they met. But then the prose is sharp and witty and I really grew to enjoy it.
Many thanks to ancientreader for bringing this novella and this author to my attention!
February 8, 2025
Personally your honor I thought the piss kink depicted here in exhibit A was just ok and I will admit under oath that it is my personal opinion, in regards to the topic of piss kink being decided today, that I may perhaps be very hard to please when it comes to this kink which I believe indicates the innocence of the defendant more than anything thus making me a terrible witness to call to the stand for this case and you should probably let me go home or something
October 16, 2023
3.5 ⭐️
Come for the piss kink, stay for the feeeeeeeelings.
Since I am lazy and behind on everything, I will defer to ancientreader's much more thoughtful and reflective review.
This was way more emotions than I thought I'd be getting in a golden shower novella. But surprisingly affecting!
Come for the piss kink, stay for the feeeeeeeelings.
Since I am lazy and behind on everything, I will defer to ancientreader's much more thoughtful and reflective review.
This was way more emotions than I thought I'd be getting in a golden shower novella. But surprisingly affecting!
April 3, 2024
Was this the literary masterpiece of the century? No. But it was short and cute and silly. It also centers around two mc’s navigating a p*ss kink—which is probably one of the farthest topics I’d think to read let alone enjoy. But I did, enjoy it I mean.
I laughed, I cried, and I swooned. Silly men, loving each other despite their silly misgivings.
**kink negotiation wasn’t handled appropriately leading to terrible miscommunication and upset parties. Of course this is fiction, not guidebook!
I laughed, I cried, and I swooned. Silly men, loving each other despite their silly misgivings.
**kink negotiation wasn’t handled appropriately leading to terrible miscommunication and upset parties. Of course this is fiction, not guidebook!
June 24, 2025
⭐️ 3.5 stars ⭐️
I knew what I was getting into. Somehow, I was still surprised.
Watersports aside, I kinda loved Sidney Bell’s style. I liked the storytelling, the opposite characters.
I thought the kink exploration was realistic — a little clumsy and a lot messy. And I loved that it wasn’t perfect, that Nuke didn’t go immediately crazy for Lee’s kink, that he did it because it made Lee happy. Because he wanted Lee to be happy.
The denial and miscommunication was funny and painful at the same time, but if anyone’s going to ignore the yellow elephant in the room, it would definitely be Nuke.
A short & kinky, friends to “i’ll piss on you, bro” to lovers.
"It's not a big deal." Lee's staring at him like he has horns. "You think it's gross." "Well. Yeah, I guess. But I gotta go somewhere. Sometime. I might as well go on you."
I knew what I was getting into. Somehow, I was still surprised.
So many people make stupid, impulsive decisions when they're drunk, decisions that can change their whole lives because they don't think about the repercussions. Nuke's glad he's not that dumb.
Watersports aside, I kinda loved Sidney Bell’s style. I liked the storytelling, the opposite characters.
I thought the kink exploration was realistic — a little clumsy and a lot messy. And I loved that it wasn’t perfect, that Nuke didn’t go immediately crazy for Lee’s kink, that he did it because it made Lee happy. Because he wanted Lee to be happy.
This whole time, he's been rocking Lee's world and didn't even know it, and it's sex, they've been having sex, it's sex.
The denial and miscommunication was funny and painful at the same time, but if anyone’s going to ignore the yellow elephant in the room, it would definitely be Nuke.
A short & kinky, friends to “i’ll piss on you, bro” to lovers.
“I never stopped needing you. The problem is that now I need more. I need everything."
Read
February 1, 2025Surprisingly sweet and tender
February 28, 2024
This was so lovely, which isn’t what I thought I’d be saying about a book that involved piss play. It’s not a kink I haven’t read before…. But mostly from an erotica angle. This isn’t erotic, ‘tis romance.
I love Nuke’s willingness to try and give someone he cares deeply for what they crave, even if it’s something he is initial squicked out by. I love that Lee trusts him to give it.
Sidney Bell once more delivers.
I love Nuke’s willingness to try and give someone he cares deeply for what they crave, even if it’s something he is initial squicked out by. I love that Lee trusts him to give it.
Sidney Bell once more delivers.
February 5, 2024
This was ridiculously well written. Two lessons. Golden showers?/piss play?/erotic urination? can be really hot. And Lee gives terrible, terrible blow jobs.
Seriously 😂😂😂😂each time Nuke thinks of them, he thinks the word terrible twice.
Seriously 😂😂😂😂each time Nuke thinks of them, he thinks the word terrible twice.
September 1, 2024
I was saving this little 100 page gem because I knew I'd probably love it and I was right! A huge part of why I loved it was because it was written by Sidney Bell, who is an incredible writer and incredible storyteller. She knew how to approach this taboo romance (a friends to lovers romance where one MC accidentally discovers that his best friend has a fetish for being pissed on) so it came across as adorable and respectful. One of the things I loved is that the author knew she needed to use the friends to lovers approach in order to do justice to the premise within just 100 pages. Since the MCs have known each other for years and absolutely adore each other, it created an automatic bond between them and made it realistic that Nuke would be very willing to piss on Lee in order to make Lee's long-held fantasies come to life, even though pissing on anybody or piss in general isn't arousing for Nuke.
I also appreciated that Nuke never develops an enjoyment of watersports and he never finds it arousing. This was realistic since it happens often that people's kinks might not necessarily line up but if it's a kink that isn't pushing somebody to cross moral boundaries that they shouldn't be pushed to cross, it's a sign of how much somebody loves somebody else if they're still willing to engage in the kink. In this case, it's always clear that the act of pissing on Lee does nothing for Nuke (he gets desensitized to it eventually so it stops grossing him out but then he feels ambivalent about it) but what does impact him is seeing how happy engaging in the act makes Lee. Making Lee happy was a top priority for Nuke and also made Nuke happy, which meant it made perfect sense that Nuke was always ready and willing to give Lee what he needed.
The reason I can't give this adorable story 5 stars is because the final arc was way too rushed. I got worried when I was in the final third and Nuke still hadn't developed any romantic feelings towards Lee after they had been engaging in platonic watersports for months. Then things got a bit more sexual between them, but in a non-healthy way that still didn't lead to Nuke having his 'I'm in love with Lee' moment. In a disappointing twist, Nuke randomly decides he's in love with Lee and wants to be with him following a conversation with his brother. This was disappointing since the story would have gone the same way if both Lee and Nuke had secretly harbored feelings for each other prior to starting their little arrangement. Maybe the author wanted to make the point that Nuke was willing to engage in piss kink with Lee when Nuke didn't have romantic feelings for his buddy because otherwise, his motivations and consent would have been questioned by readers. I understand that and I appreciate the approach the author chose, but it meant the story should have been longer to allow Nuke's feelings for Lee to grow romantic naturally.
In addition, I was disappointed that the big smut scenes between the MCs (after they get together) were all done via telling instead of showing. In particular, Lee is the regular bottom and that's a dynamic I love so I was excited to enjoy some smut scenes of the two together but we only get told about those scenes. Again, I think this was a consequence of the author wanting to keep this story short but it was a disappointing choice. According to the author's blog post about this story, this was written as a gift for her patreon supporters a few years ago but she ended up not enjoying that whole setup and I think the rushed approach to the final arc was due to the author wanting to quickly finish an obligation that she realized she wasn't enjoying. In any case, it would be great if the author chose to return to this story one day and cleaned up the ending because it doesn't meet her usual standards.
But despite those negatives, I knew this would be an adorable, respectful and very enjoyable romance because I trust the author and I wasn't wrong. Even if you're not a fan of piss kink (Nuke sympathizes), I encourage you to give this little gem a try because the MCs, their friendship and their romance are all heartwarming.
I also appreciated that Nuke never develops an enjoyment of watersports and he never finds it arousing. This was realistic since it happens often that people's kinks might not necessarily line up but if it's a kink that isn't pushing somebody to cross moral boundaries that they shouldn't be pushed to cross, it's a sign of how much somebody loves somebody else if they're still willing to engage in the kink. In this case, it's always clear that the act of pissing on Lee does nothing for Nuke (he gets desensitized to it eventually so it stops grossing him out but then he feels ambivalent about it) but what does impact him is seeing how happy engaging in the act makes Lee. Making Lee happy was a top priority for Nuke and also made Nuke happy, which meant it made perfect sense that Nuke was always ready and willing to give Lee what he needed.
The reason I can't give this adorable story 5 stars is because the final arc was way too rushed. I got worried when I was in the final third and Nuke still hadn't developed any romantic feelings towards Lee after they had been engaging in platonic watersports for months. Then things got a bit more sexual between them, but in a non-healthy way that still didn't lead to Nuke having his 'I'm in love with Lee' moment. In a disappointing twist, Nuke randomly decides he's in love with Lee and wants to be with him following a conversation with his brother. This was disappointing since the story would have gone the same way if both Lee and Nuke had secretly harbored feelings for each other prior to starting their little arrangement. Maybe the author wanted to make the point that Nuke was willing to engage in piss kink with Lee when Nuke didn't have romantic feelings for his buddy because otherwise, his motivations and consent would have been questioned by readers. I understand that and I appreciate the approach the author chose, but it meant the story should have been longer to allow Nuke's feelings for Lee to grow romantic naturally.
In addition, I was disappointed that the big smut scenes between the MCs (after they get together) were all done via telling instead of showing. In particular, Lee is the regular bottom and that's a dynamic I love so I was excited to enjoy some smut scenes of the two together but we only get told about those scenes. Again, I think this was a consequence of the author wanting to keep this story short but it was a disappointing choice. According to the author's blog post about this story, this was written as a gift for her patreon supporters a few years ago but she ended up not enjoying that whole setup and I think the rushed approach to the final arc was due to the author wanting to quickly finish an obligation that she realized she wasn't enjoying. In any case, it would be great if the author chose to return to this story one day and cleaned up the ending because it doesn't meet her usual standards.
But despite those negatives, I knew this would be an adorable, respectful and very enjoyable romance because I trust the author and I wasn't wrong. Even if you're not a fan of piss kink (Nuke sympathizes), I encourage you to give this little gem a try because the MCs, their friendship and their romance are all heartwarming.
January 25, 2024
Best friends to lovers with kink exploration. My first book with piss kink and I went searching for more immediately. But the greatness of the story isn’t really about the kink itself, but the love and acceptance between a couple who don’t exactly share a kink, but get off on each other’s pleasure. Great novella that gives so much in just 100 pages
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December 13, 2024A well-written story about how relationships and communication are difficult, whether you involve kink in them or not. Perhaps very much more so if you involve kink. I’m in my novella era and will clearly not be deterred by any subject matter.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 21, 2023
4.5 stars Top-notch romance novella with the right dose of angst and sweet tender love, and a splash of water sports fetish.
Despite its bold plunge into the kink/fetish, this is more romance than erotica. Well-written prose, lovely round characters, great romance tension, and sexy yet adorable bedroom—or, more precisely—bathroom scenes.
A perfect read for those who want to dabble in romance/erotica featuring water sports fetish but feel intimidated trying something too hardcore.
Despite its bold plunge into the kink/fetish, this is more romance than erotica. Well-written prose, lovely round characters, great romance tension, and sexy yet adorable bedroom—or, more precisely—bathroom scenes.
A perfect read for those who want to dabble in romance/erotica featuring water sports fetish but feel intimidated trying something too hardcore.
November 6, 2023
Wow, what a gem. Two guys who can’t communicate and have thoughts of what is and what isn’t sex.
August 22, 2024
This book is so much more than I thought it would be. I was expecting kink, I was not expecting so much heart. The bond between Lee and Nuke is amazing. I wish Sidney Bell had a million more books.
March 27, 2025
No pregunten como llegue a este libro y porque lo terminé, porque la verdad no sé 🥲
April 23, 2024
I mean, what more can I do than reiterate what all my reading buddies have already stated?
Expected to love this, loved it even more than expected (why did noone tell me this is a bromance?!)
Dingdongs, best friends to lovers, kink exploration (enjoyed the slightly different take on compatibility than usual!) and all around a lovely story. Will have to read more Sidney Bell!
NSFW infos:
- watersports
- blowjobs
- probs more I can't remember
Expected to love this, loved it even more than expected (why did noone tell me this is a bromance?!)
Dingdongs, best friends to lovers, kink exploration (enjoyed the slightly different take on compatibility than usual!) and all around a lovely story. Will have to read more Sidney Bell!
NSFW infos:
- watersports
- blowjobs
- probs more I can't remember
September 10, 2023
Great novella with in just the right amount of angst with a satisfying HEA.
October 6, 2023
not my usual read but so well written so good i loved it
February 6, 2024
I might come back and write a little more, but I wanted to jot down a few impressions while everything’s still fresh.
The secret kink explored in this best friends to lovers novella is piss kink. Not something I usually read about, but other reviews made me curious.
“It’s just pee,” says Daniel “Nuke” Nuka, the POV character, several times throughout this story, after his initial surprise over his best friend Lee’s secret kink fades.
Newsflash: it’s not just pee; it’s love—the kind of love that seeks to understand and to accept even what seems “gross” at first—though it takes Nuke a while to figure that out and even longer to find his words and actually use them properly.
I read romances because I like reading about people finding, sometimes losing, and navigating love. It’s that simple. This warm, sweet story worked for me because the author made me care about her characters and made me believe they love each other.
The secret kink explored in this best friends to lovers novella is piss kink. Not something I usually read about, but other reviews made me curious.
“It’s just pee,” says Daniel “Nuke” Nuka, the POV character, several times throughout this story, after his initial surprise over his best friend Lee’s secret kink fades.
Newsflash: it’s not just pee; it’s love—the kind of love that seeks to understand and to accept even what seems “gross” at first—though it takes Nuke a while to figure that out and even longer to find his words and actually use them properly.
I read romances because I like reading about people finding, sometimes losing, and navigating love. It’s that simple. This warm, sweet story worked for me because the author made me care about her characters and made me believe they love each other.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 24, 2024
WEY, está buenísima!!!! Pero me hubiera gustado que se desarrollara más, igual no me quejo. Lee tiene un fetiche bien rari y es que gusta watersports (??) lo había leído en los libros de Seven Rue, pero como que era de la nada, pero aquí se describe desde el sentirse asqueado a querer cumplir las fantasias de su amigo pensando que simplemente es pis, me dio risa que Nuke nunca se dió cuenta que tenía sexo con su mejor amigo. Me entretuvo muchísimo para ser una novela corta con un kink tabú!!!!
September 10, 2024
This book is about watersports but it’s also incredibly sweet with two best friends falling in love. 🥺😍
January 12, 2025
4.75 ⭐️ rounded up
can’t say I ever expected to cry about a story w piss kink, but here we are
can’t say I ever expected to cry about a story w piss kink, but here we are
November 5, 2023
This was so wholesome, I love these two idiots. It’s decided, I’ll like anything Sidney bell writes. Even books about pisskink…
March 24, 2024
That was a refreshingly unusual novel, but with a major mistake.
The MCs' characterization is extremely good. I enjoy MCs with two different personalities, but I like it even more when you can feel these differences when they talk.
However I have three critiques:
1. You need a suspension of disbelief for how the plot really starts, because in no universe would something like that happen.
2. Sure, one MC is not into piss kink, but the disgusting aspect in his eyes is repeated far too often, especially towards the end. His acceptance to practice it for his BF is eventually presented as a sacrifice. Am I the only one to see that as morally wrong to force oneself to accept to do something disgusting in one's eyes? Isn't love all about respecting each other's boundaries, accepting the other one as he is, and therefore remaining true to oneself? In the end I lost sympathy for this MC, while the other adorable one felt presented as a victim of his kink.
So, while tackling the interesting question about how far you would go for love, this book actually felt like kink shaming. I find that quite disturbing, since books dealing with other kinks, BDSM, etc. usually hold the opposite stance.
3. When one MC asks the other one why he likes this kink, his answer is "I feel like I'm owned". Hum, that's a bit underwhelming for an answer. I would picture this answer for other kinks, but here it feels awkward.
I would have put 2 additional stars if the author had written a story about one guy pissing on another one for love although he is not taking pleasure in it, instead of a story about one guy forcing himself to do something he finds disgusting for love.
Thankfully the writing style was excellent.
The MCs' characterization is extremely good. I enjoy MCs with two different personalities, but I like it even more when you can feel these differences when they talk.
However I have three critiques:
1. You need a suspension of disbelief for how the plot really starts, because in no universe would something like that happen.
2. Sure, one MC is not into piss kink, but the disgusting aspect in his eyes is repeated far too often, especially towards the end. His acceptance to practice it for his BF is eventually presented as a sacrifice. Am I the only one to see that as morally wrong to force oneself to accept to do something disgusting in one's eyes? Isn't love all about respecting each other's boundaries, accepting the other one as he is, and therefore remaining true to oneself? In the end I lost sympathy for this MC, while the other adorable one felt presented as a victim of his kink.
So, while tackling the interesting question about how far you would go for love, this book actually felt like kink shaming. I find that quite disturbing, since books dealing with other kinks, BDSM, etc. usually hold the opposite stance.
3. When one MC asks the other one why he likes this kink, his answer is "I feel like I'm owned". Hum, that's a bit underwhelming for an answer. I would picture this answer for other kinks, but here it feels awkward.
I would have put 2 additional stars if the author had written a story about one guy pissing on another one for love although he is not taking pleasure in it, instead of a story about one guy forcing himself to do something he finds disgusting for love.
Thankfully the writing style was excellent.
March 22, 2026
go piss girl
November 14, 2023
Hope bell writes a full length book, this was awesome.
February 28, 2026
This book made me laugh a few times and made me warm with the love and care that’s so obviously present in both. I liked that it was a kink i don’t think i’ve ever read a fictional book about before; it’s a daring subject. I also liked how Lee explained how difficult it can be to find that person; to either seek them out for the kink, or wing it in the wild and hope for the best.
Having said that, i have to point out that Fetlife isn’t a porn site, though you can find photos and videos on there that can be perceived as such. Fetlife is a platform that i see as a kind of ‘Facebook for kinky people’, where you can make connections, find out parties and meet-ups and read about kink more in depth or people’s personal experiences. It’s also a place that can help you feel less alone in your desires and thoughts and feelings.
The book is too short to really get a more fleshed out idea of the characters, but i feel like a pornsite with actual bdsm/piss play (which can be found enough) would have fit better in this story. Especially since we never get back to Fetlife. It would have been different if the author chose to tell us about Lee’s adventuring in kink or maybe even meeting up with likeminded people in a non-kink setting. Now it felt really random to throw Fetlife in the story.
It also became apparent that the plot of their relationship hangs on miscommunication/no communication. I finished this book because it was short, if it hadn’t been i would have dnf’ed because of that. I really dislike that ‘plot’. It also makes the end of this book less strong because as soon as the plot breaks (aka they are talking), the author chooses to go into telling made almost completely. We don’t experience their first time with them and even the kink-scene isn’t written out completely; which is sad because kink is so much more than the actual kink. The intimacy depends on all the moments: leading up to, the actual scene and the aftercare. Something, I have to say, also would’ve been nice of Lee to share with Nuke, a little bit more about what kink is, how you threat your partner or scene and aftercare ~ even if they were only friends. Lee could’ve given him some information to read through.
But i guess that’s fiction for you.
Having said that, i have to point out that Fetlife isn’t a porn site, though you can find photos and videos on there that can be perceived as such. Fetlife is a platform that i see as a kind of ‘Facebook for kinky people’, where you can make connections, find out parties and meet-ups and read about kink more in depth or people’s personal experiences. It’s also a place that can help you feel less alone in your desires and thoughts and feelings.
The book is too short to really get a more fleshed out idea of the characters, but i feel like a pornsite with actual bdsm/piss play (which can be found enough) would have fit better in this story. Especially since we never get back to Fetlife. It would have been different if the author chose to tell us about Lee’s adventuring in kink or maybe even meeting up with likeminded people in a non-kink setting. Now it felt really random to throw Fetlife in the story.
It also became apparent that the plot of their relationship hangs on miscommunication/no communication. I finished this book because it was short, if it hadn’t been i would have dnf’ed because of that. I really dislike that ‘plot’. It also makes the end of this book less strong because as soon as the plot breaks (aka they are talking), the author chooses to go into telling made almost completely. We don’t experience their first time with them and even the kink-scene isn’t written out completely; which is sad because kink is so much more than the actual kink. The intimacy depends on all the moments: leading up to, the actual scene and the aftercare. Something, I have to say, also would’ve been nice of Lee to share with Nuke, a little bit more about what kink is, how you threat your partner or scene and aftercare ~ even if they were only friends. Lee could’ve given him some information to read through.
But i guess that’s fiction for you.
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