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The Wrong Knickers: A Decade of Chaos

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Bryony Gordon survived her adolescence by dreaming about the life she'd have in her the perfect job; the lovely flat; the amazing boyfriend. The reality was something of a shock. Her Telegraph column was a diary of her daily screw-ups; she lived in a series of squalid shoe boxes; and her most meaningful relationship of the entire decade was with a Marlboro Light.

Here in the Sunday Times bestselling THE WRONG KNICKERS Bryony busts open the glamorized myth of what it means to be a young (perpetually) single girl about London town, and shares the horrible and hilarious truth. The truth about picking up a colleague at the STI clinic; sinking into debt to fund a varied diet of wine, crisps and vodka; and how it feels when your dream man turns out to be a one night stand who hands you someone else's knickers in the morning.

Bryony's wonderfully ridiculous and ultimately redemptive story is essential reading for everyone whose 'best years' weren't quite what they were expecting...

322 pages, Kindle Edition

First published April 24, 2014

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Bryony Gordon

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5 stars
1,551 (27%)
4 stars
1,941 (35%)
3 stars
1,438 (25%)
2 stars
460 (8%)
1 star
150 (2%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 284 reviews
Profile Image for Laura.
119 reviews11 followers
August 6, 2014
I fear I'm the equivalent of Bryony's smug married friend Sally by giving this book two stars, but I couldn't give it any more in good conscience.

There's no doubt she's a smart(ish) hack with a decent enough turn of phrase, but her tales are so sordid and removed from my comparatively tame 20s that I found it all a bit too car-crash. I found her self-revulsion after her various disastrous escapades (going straight to the office after a night of copious coke-snorting and booze, taking ecstasy at Glastonbury, getting involved with a married bloke) interesting, though; it made me want to give her a good shake. If you know it's not good for you morally or health-wise or psychologically or whatever then show some self-restraint already and DON'T DO IT. Stop blaming your parents' divorce and being so bloody dramatic. Get it together, already!

But then I am a prude. Or a bore. Whatevs.

I wonder why she wrote this. To absolve herself of guilt? To horrify her mother? I can only hope that some disillusioned 20-somethings read this and decide to do something about their messed-up lives a bit sooner than Bryony did. Oh, and that 'something'? Doesn't have to be meeting a bloke.
Profile Image for Jennifer Simpson.
32 reviews2 followers
July 8, 2014
We've all been this girl at some point, but Bryony is just brave enough to write about it-very well too.
350 reviews4 followers
October 10, 2014
I used to enjoy Bryony Gordon's columns in the Telegraph, but then, shock horror, she had a baby and became one of the smug marrieds and I now find her columns completely unreadable. This book veered between the two - I enjoyed some of Bryony's views - especially the whole chapter on the madness of the wedding shindig, but overall she is such a shallow, narcissistic character that it's really hard not to want to slap her. She is unable to exercise any kind of self discipline and is the kind of woman who gives other women a bad name - she can't really be friends with anyone as she is so selfish and has to bring everything back to herself and lack of boyfriend, and is jealous if her friend/sister has a partner, she doesn't bother to finish university, racks up debt at every turn and is proud of her inability to manage money, drinks copiously and takes shedloads of drugs every night before poncing into work late and doing nothing, and also sleeping her way round London while being surprised that no man wants to have a proper relationship with her. This is trying to be a modern Bridget Jones, but is frankly just a bit pathetic.
Profile Image for Hel Cruse.
272 reviews3 followers
May 10, 2018
The Wrong Book

Don’t get me wrong. The wrong knickers part of it was actually hysterical. However. If this was a learning tale. That is when Bryony should have learnt. She just went from bad to disgusting. Wasn’t even funny by the end. I gave up about 1/4 to the end and then felt every book deserves to be read

This truly. Didn’t
Profile Image for Claire Reviews.
966 reviews39 followers
December 1, 2015
Review: The Wrong Knickers by Bryony Gordon Published by: Headline (January 1st 2015)
 
ISBN: 978-1472210142
 
Source: review copy provided by publisher
 
Rating: 4*
 
Synopsis:
Bryony Gordon survived her adolescence by dreaming about the life she'd have in her twenties: the perfect job; the lovely flat; the amazing boyfriend. The reality was something of a shock. Her Telegraph column was a diary of her daily screw-ups; she lived in a series of squalid shoe boxes; and her most meaningful relationship of the entire decade was with a Marlboro Light. Here in the Sunday Times bestselling THE WRONG KNICKERS Bryony busts open the glamorized myth of what it means to be a young (perpetually) single girl about London town, and shares the horrible and hilarious truth. The truth about picking up a colleague at the STI clinic; sinking into debt to fund a varied diet of wine, crisps and vodka; and how it feels when your dream man turns out to be a one night stand who hands you someone else's knickers in the morning. Bryony's wonderfully ridiculous and ultimately redemptive story is essential reading for everyone whose 'best years' weren't quite what they were expecting...
 
Review:
The Wrong Knickers is fabulously funny, cunningly cringeworthy and surprisingly sad. A Bridget Jones for the new generation, Bryony Gordon recounts her life as a single twenty-something in all its embarrassing glory. I laughed out loud and spat out my tea in places, shook my head in disbelief in others, but I found it hard to put down.
Profile Image for Hayley.
87 reviews2 followers
April 26, 2015
This book had me laughing to the point of tears at some parts. I am not yet twenty, yet even I could relate to so many experiences (the embarrassing indie stage anyone?) and I'm sure most, if not all, other readers could too.

The writing style makes it seem like you are being told this riveting tale by your rather candid best friend, or even better, a drunken stranger you've just met in your local, who will become your best friend. Bryony Gordon is my new Caitlin Moran.

I adored this book, everything about it. It is brutally honest about the life and loves of a modern woman but remains hilarious. The ending, in which Bryony sums up what has became of her life, had me in floods of relieved tears.

I recommend this book to all women who feel they aren't getting anywhere, and all people who read and loved Caitlin Moran's How To Be a Woman.

This review contains opinions on an ARC, all opinions are my own and are in no way influenced by the author or publisher.
Profile Image for Beffcrk.
44 reviews
November 12, 2023
I almost can’t be bothered to review, I struggled to make it to the end. The initial wrong knickers story was funny and then it was downhill from there with minimal amusement. I didn’t realise for a long while that this was actually the authors story but I’m not sure why you would want to tell the world this? I just found myself getting annoyed.

The message seems to be don’t be very nice, treat people like crap, be completely self obsessed but don’t worry it will all work out in the end and you’ll be a success? Weird vibes. Not for me, glad I can finally get rid of this book. It was also annoying that almost every chapter was 20+ pages.
12 reviews
May 9, 2025
A painful but wildly honest memoir of the messy times in your 20s.

Whether we’d like to admit it or not, we can all relate to some aspect of Gordon’s crazy drunken anecdotes or narrow-minded views of how we should be living our 20s, she just had the balls to put it all down on paper.
Profile Image for em.
86 reviews
April 27, 2025
i hate bryony gordon. if she was my friend i would despise her and never speak to her again. what a desperate, annoying, selfish prick - every chapter i disliked her more and more.

i cannot stand everything in her life being around men. i may be chronically single but i would take that any day over the pathetic attempts bryony made for all these losers to love her - most importantly the MARRIED MAN! i cannot believe her friends even put up with that drama without telling her to grow the fuck up and stop fucking a married man. also why is she so obsessed with this sam loser who broke up with her like 10 years ago get a GRIP.

she tried to act like every bad money decision she made was some quirky silly thing was so insufferable.

i think the reason i hate this so much is because these are true stories from a real, insufferable person that did actually work for the telegraph. also the fact she spent her whole 20s being the biggest fuck up ever and all it took was one man for her to get her life on track.

if you want to read a book that is going to piss you off, read this!!
5 reviews1 follower
March 6, 2015
This book was billed as the follow up to Bridget Jones, which unfortunately gave me false expectations. That would have been accurate if Bridget Jones did lots of drugs, slept with random men, went into massive debt, took out expensive loans which then got immediately spent on unnecessary clothing. It was horribly painful to read the self-destructiveness of the author in what is apparently a true autobiography. Miraculously, a nice man who wants to help her ends up being her partner which makes me wonder if men want someone they can fix. My take-away lesson was that perhaps being a responsible, successful member of society is not the way to find a nice husband.
Profile Image for Heather.
239 reviews
May 16, 2017
Book touted as a "Bridget Jones Diary" reboot.

It seems sadder to me. British girl outgrows anorexia to become alcoholic. Falls into being a writer as well as the beds of all the wrong men.

Tales of drinking, smoking and self loathing promiscuity
Profile Image for Lara.
30 reviews2 followers
January 5, 2016


More reviews on my blog


Actual Rating: 1.5 Stars

It started, as ever, with a kiss.

It always starts starts with a kiss.

It never starts with five pints of lager, three shots of tequile, and your bottom being groped in a dingy bar, does it?



This is supposed to be a "humourous" autobiography about a woman in her twenties screwing up. I put humourous in quotation marks because it didn't work for me at all. There were some parts that made me smile faintly, but only faintly. The situations were so gut-wrenching most of the time that I couldn't find them funny. I was cringing throughout the book.

The worst thing is not that he wants to use a breakfast food as a lubricant, that he wants to butter up my vagina as if it's a piece of toast, thus possibly giving me thrush or cystitis or God-only-knows-what embarrassing condition that I will have to explain to a doctor. The worst thing is that, to allow my ridiculous fantasy of a life together to continue to flourish, I find myself making up an excuse instead of telling him to get lost. I find myself buttering him up, if you will.

'Oh,' I say, thinking on my feet. 'I'd love to, but I'm lactose intolerant.


I am a single woman in my twenties so you'd think I'd find some sort of common ground with Bryony, but no. The few good points she made are few and far between.

What annoyed me most of all is that this book makes her seem so incredibly desperate for a boyfriend. This book is all about her quest for a man. It is all about men and that made it annoying and boring.

I spend most of my day staring at my mobile, trying to magic some sort of Happy Christmas text from Sam. I decide to send him one myself, one that looks as if I have just casually sent it to everyone in my phone book.

'Happy Christmas! Hope you're having a great one! Bxxx'.

'Yeah, you too,' he replies, on Boxing Day.



A man will change everything. The terrible thing is, that in the end, a man changes everything. It's not that she grows up and comes into her own. No, it is all put at the feet of her new boyfriend. He changed everything.

'Is it totally tragic that it has taken a man to make me calm?



Yes. Yes it is.

Then there's the overall terrible, terrible decisions Bryony makes. I have a high tolerance for terrible decisions. People screw up, people make mistakes. And usually it leads to an interesting story. But here it just had me shaking my head in disbelief all the time.

I actually feel fretful and guilty, as if I have led him on. This man who has a girlfriend has made me feel as if I have done something wrong. 'Sorry,' I actually say, moving up to the sofa next to him and uncupping my boobs, in an attempt to lighten the mood. 'It would be much more fun to get to it.'

And so it is that we have uncomfortable, perfuncory, brief sex, not on his sofa - good God, we wouldn't want to leave a stain on the cushions now, would we? - but on the floor, my hips digging into the wood as he grunts on top of me. And when it's over, thankfully very quickly, he says that it is probably best I don't stay, as he needs a good night's sleep and anyway, I probably want to get homt to my own bed.


It was just painful. I wanted to shake her awake. I am very very sorry to use this word, but the way this book was written it made her seem terribly pathetic.


Conclusion

It wasn't for me. The humour didn't work for me at all and I spent most of my time shaking my head, ugh-ing.
Profile Image for Lisa.
318 reviews23 followers
June 11, 2018
I usually hope to learn something in some way when I read memoir (or whatever this is) but there's nothing teachable in this.

Tbh I should probably stop reading memoirs by middle class white women from London 🤷‍♀️
Profile Image for Hope.
84 reviews2 followers
July 22, 2014
I saw a story with the author talking about having a one night stand and at the end the guy giving her the wrong knickers. Like......


What kind of guy does that and I was interested so I got the book. From the beginning it is easy to read and get into and for a lot of authors that's very hard to do. We see the true story of a girl who makes mistakes, picks the wrong choices and has such a low self-esteem that she lets guys roll over her.

I feel like even though I never did even half the things she did I can relate to her in mild sort of way especially now in my 20's and I will probably read this book again because there will be something new in my life that I can relate to her life story. It's like a book about how things might not go according to how society expects it to be, like uni, boyfriends, marriage, careers and family. Your path might be different from the norm but in some weird way in the end everything has a funny way of working itself out.

It was a great read and it was even more amusing because it was a true story, even though I don't know her I am proud of her.

Profile Image for Lucy Mitchell.
Author 5 books50 followers
March 2, 2017
One of the funniest books I have ever read. Don't try eating couscous in work canteen whilst reading this book! None of my work colleagues want to sit next to me now. This book is funnier than Bridget Jones. I loved every bit of it and the wrong knickers story is hilarious. A fabulous book to read if you are in a low mood.
167 reviews
January 6, 2020
Spoiler alert...you're a fuck up until a man comes along to save you.
Profile Image for Steffs.Chapter.
113 reviews5 followers
August 22, 2020
One for the DNF pile.
Just could not get into it.
I am typically happy to read anything and get through anything, but this was not for me at all. I love classy trashy moments, don't we all? But the whiny, me me me.. I need a man .. I just can't do it.
Profile Image for Lisa Green.
156 reviews5 followers
June 26, 2021
Not really the light-hearted read it appears to be. A small number of funny incidents punctuate this pitiful recounting of an early adulthood squandered on drink & drugs. Dull/boring at times. Overriding feeling whilst reading was irritation at the privileged middle class attitude. I realise I may have missed the point of the book, but it's an honest assessment of how it made me feel. Pleased for her that she sorted it out in the end. I hope she's content and peaceful now, and wish her the best for the future.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Florrie Taylor.
10 reviews
March 8, 2022
A very easy read, a nice book to read after something quite heavy. A collection of human mishaps that made me chuckle - an insight into just how crap the 20’s can be for women!
Profile Image for Chloe.
190 reviews2 followers
February 20, 2022
I really enjoyed this book, bryony brutally honest as always no detail goes unsaid or missed, funny and chaotic a really good read
Profile Image for Anna.
9 reviews1 follower
October 29, 2024
Good lord I disliked this. The one time I didn’t carefully screen reviews first. Never again.
Profile Image for Ruth Wilde.
23 reviews1 follower
December 31, 2019
A nice book to end the year I turned 30 in. I also want to be friends with her.
Profile Image for Lydia Robinson.
6 reviews1 follower
September 3, 2021
Enjoyed this as a light read, although it is a bittersweet read with the benefit of hindsight now Bryony is so open about her issues with addiction and mental illness at the time.
Profile Image for Beth.
164 reviews8 followers
June 27, 2023
A nice, easy read. Some parts were a little dragged out and felt a bit entitled. But it was a nice laid back, ‘don’t need to think about it’ read.
Profile Image for Gill's likes reading.
149 reviews12 followers
January 27, 2015
So you single twenties something want to move out of your comfortable family home into a dingy damp flat to live your life without restrictions….?

Hilariously funny in parts, cringingly embarrassing, this book has all the tips for a good time and the warnings for the worst times ever. Every single 18 year old girl should read this when when they are saying ‘nah, that’ll never be me’, and then identifying with this in their twenties:

She takes up exercise of any sort: Yoga, kickboxing, dancing, running:
“My lungs feel like they are about to explode. Some people talk about the sense of freedom they feel when they go running, but I think they might be psychopaths.

Drink, drugs, sex, wrong relationships, embarrassing times in public on a regular basis, how long can this 20 year old girl seemingly be such an out of control, unlucky person in her personal life; it seems for a whole decade.

This is a book about growing up, not being grown up. I wanted to scream at her ‘switch your self control ON, no don’t go there again’. I never did drugs, but I could identify with some things here! There are some wonderful friends and family surrounding Bryony which are recognised by writer and reader alike which is great to experience throughout the book.

Going from cocaine, threesomes, chlamydia scares, drunken blackouts it feels like a downhill race into personal destruction, but one which is halted before the depths of no return. However, I am guessing each will read this book with their own experiences as a gauge.

There was so much reality of life, work and the hopeless search for ‘love’. I am so pleased that the guys were not the focus of vitriolic blaming, but portrayed with just a normal sense of relationships that were not healthy.
“He seems to lick the enamel of my mouth, as if he is trying to be some sort of human toothbrush, reaching parts that other oral cleaning instruments can’t.”

As a single guest at a wedding is always fraught especially when you are seated on the other single/misfit table. Bryony has been told she is sitting with ‘Tom’ who she will get on because he is ‘out there’ which she finds worrying but he has yet to arrive leaving her by an empty chair;
“You are the only person in the entire cavernous function room who has an empty place setting next to them. The accountant on the other side is talking to the backpacker from Australia, meaning you are left twiddling your thumbs and trying to pick up the fag ends of conversations happening elsewhere on the table, and even on the table behind you because, hey, beggars can’t be choosers.”

What did I like about best about this book?
This is an honest account of how sucked into city life you can get just to be cool, it show how trying so hard to fit in is fraught with risks, and I liked how Bryony gives such a great ending, with the reality of how love creeps up and then takes working at.

I would have given it four stars but in parts it felt a bit aimless.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Many thanks to the publisher for a paperback copy for an honest review.
Profile Image for Fabulous Book Fiend.
1,191 reviews173 followers
August 3, 2014
Review: wow I really enjoyed this book. I love a bit of non-fiction every now and then and this book was so true and so funny that I sailed through it in absolutely no time at all. I think I came to this book at a silty subjective angle since I now have 5 months left of my twenties and am about to move into my thirties therefore I am taking a look back at this decade too but this book gave me a kind of hope that we all go through this time and we all make stupid mistakes in our twenties but that they all teach us something in the long run.

This book is written from the first person and so you feel the whole way through this book that Bryony is chatting to you over a bottle of wine and some Kettle chips and just recounting to you things she has done. She compares the time she was the only single one at a dinner party to the time you were the only single one at a dinner party. You chat about the horror of trying to find a flat to rent on your own, especially one within an easy commut to work and how it would be so much easier if you were part of a couple. The horror of discovering that the party you decided to spontaneously host was really the worst idea you have ever had, and each anecdote becomes more and more hilarious.

This woman Is seriously braver that most of us though because she really does lay it all out there for you to see. The drinking, the mistakes, the break ups and all the feelings that go with that. She tells you about her parents reaction when she decided to drop out of uni and her own feelings when she discovers the affair she was having wasn't quite what it turned out to be.

If you fancy some laughs and a few home truths then you need to be picking up this book now. If you love Sex and The a City then you will love this book and if you ever made a mistake in your twenties or things didn't turn out quite the way you thought they would then you will be able to relate to this book and you need to sit down and listen to Bryony Gordon's thoughts tourself right now. A must read!
Profile Image for Imogen.
183 reviews3 followers
February 13, 2019
Just brilliant! Bryony writes with such openness and such humour. Having read her other books first it was interesting to go back and read this. As humans we have a tendency to feel embarrassed at certain things we've done but Bryony's honesty about her past actions is really refreshing. Definitely read this and all her other books!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 284 reviews

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