**Many thanks to NetGalley, @CeladonBooks, and Tracey Lange for an ARC of this book!**
"Home isn't where you're from, it's where you find light when all grows dark." - Pierce Brown
Kyle McCray had his reasons for leaving the small town and close knit community of Potsdam, NY, his family, and his wife, a woman who has he loved for SIXTEEN years, Casey. But Kyle didn't exactly warn his friends, family, and wife that he would be leaving...and despite trying to bury his pain, for the last two and a half years, he's been dreading the day where he has to face the music and return to town. Unfortunately for Kyle, that day has arrived: he receives word that his father has suffered a stroke, and Kyle can't imagine not being by his side...so he sets off to return to Potsdam and all of the the messy situations he tried to leave behind, bracing himself for the vitriol he feels he's sure to receive.
When he arrives and begins to fall back into the familiar patterns of his old life, however, a flurry of complicated emotions run through him...and he starts to see that perhaps he was more needed and valuable to those around him than he ever knew. Although Casey is a successful and beloved middle school teacher in town, she's had a Herculean task thrown at her: SHE has been attempting to lead and coach the middle school hockey team, who needs a lot of help, to say the least. Not only that, but Kyle's father Danny is still very close to Casey...and her brother Wyatt has connections to Kyle that he can no longer ignore either. So when Kyle gets offered the opportunity to put his career as an auto mechanic aside and help lead the hockey team to glory, he hesitantly agrees. After all, he and Casey made a good team for so many years...there had to be a REASON for that, right?
But as their feelings become more muddled, vacillating between the pain of their estrangement and the enduring quality of their love, and Kyle is forced to finally deal with the grief he tried so hard to leave behind, will he discover that everything he has been desperately searching for was right at home, waiting for him to step up and shape up? Or will he choose to flee once AGAIN when the pain seems too deep, too enduring, and too large a burden for anyone to bear...even with the possibility of reconciliation, redemption, and forgiveness FINALLY within reach?
Tracey Lange has found her lane, and hasn't strayed...and I am SO grateful for it. As much as I love flexibility and authors testing the boundaries of what they 'can' and cannot effectively write, there are instances where an author has such a defined groove and niche that I can hardly imagine them writing another KIND of book...and Lange is one of those authors. Her stories always center around family: intricate, complicated, grounded, and REAL...with flaws aplenty. Her protagonists tend to be aching for redemption and forgiveness from one another...but more importantly, from THEMSELVES, and this is what makes her stories so impactful, emotional, and relatable. All of them deal with some sort of homecoming, a revisiting of what it means to be yourself after tragedy strikes and the struggle to FIND that person amidst guilt, grief, and a tangle of complicated emotions...and What Happened to the McCrays? is no exception. With a book that effectively has TWO protagonists in Kyle and Casey, you as the reader aren't supposed to choose who was 'right' in this situation...because you'll come to see how both Kyle and Casey share the blame for what happened to their marriage, and how grief, frustration, and miscommunications got each of them there.
Lange has said she was inspired to write a book about divorce this time around, and despite the natural angst and bitter pain that often accompanies this concept in our minds, WHTTM manages to be both a story of love lost AND found throughout. Weaving back and forth effortlessly between past and present, Lange explores the nuance of a relationship born so early in life and how these roots could remain both steadfast and shaken, leaving this couple in a sort of extended limbo, with both life and livelihoods hanging in the balance by journey's end. At times, I found myself begging Casey to leave the past in the past...and others, I was heartsick hoping for reunion. THIS juxtaposition, along with the added pressures of small town living, complicated dynamics between Casey's family and Kyle, and the added pressure of wrangling a group of middle school kids to small-town glory all combine for a whirlwind of emotion and drama...but NEVER veers into melodrama.
And THIS is exactly HOW Lange shines, and why her books have such an effortless feel. The echoes of pain that reverberate throughout the pages here are familiar to every reader, whether or not you personally have dealt with divorce, the declining health of a parent, or the tragedy that befell this couple years prior. You don't need to have lived the specific experiences to have lived the depth of the pain...and the moments of joy, love, and light feel even more triumphant and earned by the time you have traveled from A to Z. Each one of Lange's books is a fully formed journey...and even if this particularly journey seems as though it HAS to be circuitous, I can promise you: it is anything BUT predictable.
We think of home as a place, a building with an address, set in a town or city, in a state, or perhaps grounded in a country and all that comes with it. But oftentimes we can return to a place that USED to be home and find that it no longer even feels familiar. Has the place actually changed...or are we trying to tread a path that only exists in memory? Although I won't reveal whether Kyle and Casey have a happy ending or go their separate ways, when it comes to Tracey Lange's success with her third novel, all hockey fans know that scoring that third triumphant goal can only mean one thing:
It's officially a HAT TRICK! 🏒🏒🏒
4.5 stars