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Toss the Guilt and Catch the Joy: A Woman's Guide to a Better Life
Are you tired of worrying about things you can't control? Do you feel distracted or overwhelmed by the daily demands of living? Do you wonder if it's even possible to make space in your busy life to become the person you really want to be? In her down-to-earth style, popular author and speaker Merrilee Boyack presents eight pairs of contrasting characteristics, inviting women to consider their own tendencies: Faithful or fearful? Focused or distracted? Peaceful or worried? She then discusses how we can move from where we are to where we want to be without feeling guilty or discouraged.
160 pages, Kindle Edition
First published July 28, 2008
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334 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 87 reviews
September 3, 2016
I am a fan of the author and I enjoyed the book. It is full of good reminders- nothing terribly new- but things we as women needs lots of reminding about. Like not worrying and feeling responsible for everything... I especially liked her chapters on women of faith, not fear and women of obedience, not defiance. I did feel her opinions were a little strong on some matters but overall I liked it.
February 12, 2010
This book gave me some great ammunition for dealing with the inner 'worry-wart' in me - "no biggie", "not my problem!", "oh well"! Those words have become part of my regular self-talk and have dramatically reduced my stress level. Even my husband has remarked on how much happier I seem. I also love her depth of testimony and focus on the atonement and how it relates to us on a practical, day to day level of dealing with our weaknesses and shortcomings. And when things go wrong, reminding myself that instead of wasting energy on worrying about the things that I can't change, celebrate what I did right and turn to the Lord for help fixing what needs to be fixed.
I'm so grateful to be reading this and internalizing it NOW so that I can be a more joyful parent.
I'm so grateful to be reading this and internalizing it NOW so that I can be a more joyful parent.
February 5, 2009
I really enjoyed this book. It had lots of things it in that were just what I needed to hear.
Here are a few of the things the resonated with me. But don't just read these...If any of these quotes resonate with you I highly recommend reading the book. There is a lot more in there! It was a fun book to read.
In all living have much of fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured. ~Gordon B. Hinckley
Knowing this, Lucifer works hard at undermining our divine gift. All too often we fall into traps he has designed to estrange us from each other. He delights when we gossip and criticize and judge, when we stew over perceived offenses or measure ourselves against each other, or when we succumb to such envy that we even begrudge each others' successes...
How often have you and I made judgments that are equally unfair? Why can't we resist the urge to second-guess and evaluate each other? Why do we judge everything from the way we keep house to how many children we do or do not have? Sometimes I wonder if the final judgment will be a breeze compared with what we've put each other through here on earth! ~Sheri Dew
Your value to Him is independent of your body mass index, your accomplishments in arts, academics or athletics, your possessions, popularity, or marital status, your current calling in the Church or any other thing which can be a source of comparison and competition. ~Merrill Christensen
Heavenly Father has provided a plan for each of us to receive eternal life. He knows what each of us has experienced... And the Lord reassures us that he knows and he will pass fair and mericful judgement.
One sister think, But I was the Relief Society president! And look, I can still wear my clothes from high school. And I had a year's supply and held amazing family home evenings every single week. But in her heart she was constantly critical of others.
Another sister thinks, I struggle everyday with chronic pain from fibromyalgia. My marriage is hanging by a thread. And I am so worried about my oldest daughter. In her heart, she was constantly merciful and forgiving.
How shall the Lord reward them? Fairly!
~Merrilee Boyack
What if we were to decide today that we would make just one assumption about each other-that we are each doing the best we can? And what if we were to try a little harder to help each other? Imagine the cumulative effect, not to mention the effect on us spiritually.... As we are filled with this love, we no longer feel envy or think evil of others. ~Sheri Dew
What a powerful question, "I wonder what their story is?"...
Knowing a person's story can help us withhold judgment and extend love and understanding. But there is an even higher level of this principle: simple acceptance.
I call this level of acceptance "looking at people with Christ's eyes."...We see dysfunctional people, depressed people, addicted people, and he sees brothers and sisters whom he loves dearly, people he is willing to suffer and die for. ~MB
But it's too bad, so sad for Satan. We are far more powerful than he will ever be. We always have been. And we have the power to reject his attempts to destroy us. ~MB
In quiet moments when you think about it, you recognize what is critically important in life and what isn’t. Be wise and don’t let good things crowd out those that are essential. ~Richard G. Scott
When things of the world crowd in, all too often the wrong things take highest priority. Then it is easy to forget the fundamental purpose of life. Satan has a powerful tool to use against good people. It is distraction. He would have good people fill life with “good things” so there is no room for the essential ones. Have you unconsciously been caught in that trap? ~Richard G. Scott
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen. ~Reinhold Niebuhr
This is a truth. We must surrender to God's will, and in so doing, we can find happiness.
What if I committed to living just these two spiritual practices (scriptures & prayers) perfectly?
Then, a bold thought took hold in my brain.
Perfectly. As in every single day. As in nothing missing.
And so the idea of the "Perfect Year" was born. I committed right there that I would live a perfect year of daily prayer and scripture study. ~MB
And then his sweet assurance came. I was filled with the knowledge that he loved me enough that he was willing to suffer for every single thing I had done and would do. He loved me. Truly.
All he asked was that I would try. Each day. Try to be more obedient, and when I messed up, to turn to him, repent, and try again. ~MB
You can also look to your patriarchal blessing and see what is unfulfilled. ~MB
I will make a bold statement here and now. Some will not agree with me, but I believe that every woman who wants her family to be centered in the gospel should throw out the video game systems in her home-and throw them away where they cannot be retrieved.
But it is amazing to me how many women justify having these terrible toys in their homes. ~MB
Somehow I don't think the hymn advises, "Because I have been given much, I too must hoard!" ~MB
Mothers who know do less. They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally. They allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home. Mothers who know are willing to live on less and consume less of the world's goods in order to spend more time with their children—more time eating together, more time working together, more time reading together, more time talking, laughing, singing, and exemplifying. These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all. ~Julie B. Beck
I speak to you this morning not only about a little more effort, a little more self-discipline, a little more consecrated effort in the direction of excellence in your studies. I speak of it also in terms of your lives.
This is the great day of preparation for each of you. It is the time of beginning for something that will go on for as long as you live. I plead with you: Don't be a scrub! Rise to the high ground of excellence. You can do it. You may not be a genius. You may be lacking in some skills. But you can do better than you are now doing. You are students at BYU. Most of you are members of this great Church whose influence is now felt all over the world. You are people with a present and with a future. Don't muff the ball. Be excellent. ~Gordon B. Hinckley
Self-mastery is a rigorous process at best; too many of us want it to be effortless and painless. ~Thomas S. Monson
Here are a few of the things the resonated with me. But don't just read these...If any of these quotes resonate with you I highly recommend reading the book. There is a lot more in there! It was a fun book to read.
In all living have much of fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured. ~Gordon B. Hinckley
Knowing this, Lucifer works hard at undermining our divine gift. All too often we fall into traps he has designed to estrange us from each other. He delights when we gossip and criticize and judge, when we stew over perceived offenses or measure ourselves against each other, or when we succumb to such envy that we even begrudge each others' successes...
How often have you and I made judgments that are equally unfair? Why can't we resist the urge to second-guess and evaluate each other? Why do we judge everything from the way we keep house to how many children we do or do not have? Sometimes I wonder if the final judgment will be a breeze compared with what we've put each other through here on earth! ~Sheri Dew
Your value to Him is independent of your body mass index, your accomplishments in arts, academics or athletics, your possessions, popularity, or marital status, your current calling in the Church or any other thing which can be a source of comparison and competition. ~Merrill Christensen
Heavenly Father has provided a plan for each of us to receive eternal life. He knows what each of us has experienced... And the Lord reassures us that he knows and he will pass fair and mericful judgement.
One sister think, But I was the Relief Society president! And look, I can still wear my clothes from high school. And I had a year's supply and held amazing family home evenings every single week. But in her heart she was constantly critical of others.
Another sister thinks, I struggle everyday with chronic pain from fibromyalgia. My marriage is hanging by a thread. And I am so worried about my oldest daughter. In her heart, she was constantly merciful and forgiving.
How shall the Lord reward them? Fairly!
~Merrilee Boyack
What if we were to decide today that we would make just one assumption about each other-that we are each doing the best we can? And what if we were to try a little harder to help each other? Imagine the cumulative effect, not to mention the effect on us spiritually.... As we are filled with this love, we no longer feel envy or think evil of others. ~Sheri Dew
What a powerful question, "I wonder what their story is?"...
Knowing a person's story can help us withhold judgment and extend love and understanding. But there is an even higher level of this principle: simple acceptance.
I call this level of acceptance "looking at people with Christ's eyes."...We see dysfunctional people, depressed people, addicted people, and he sees brothers and sisters whom he loves dearly, people he is willing to suffer and die for. ~MB
But it's too bad, so sad for Satan. We are far more powerful than he will ever be. We always have been. And we have the power to reject his attempts to destroy us. ~MB
In quiet moments when you think about it, you recognize what is critically important in life and what isn’t. Be wise and don’t let good things crowd out those that are essential. ~Richard G. Scott
When things of the world crowd in, all too often the wrong things take highest priority. Then it is easy to forget the fundamental purpose of life. Satan has a powerful tool to use against good people. It is distraction. He would have good people fill life with “good things” so there is no room for the essential ones. Have you unconsciously been caught in that trap? ~Richard G. Scott
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen. ~Reinhold Niebuhr
This is a truth. We must surrender to God's will, and in so doing, we can find happiness.
What if I committed to living just these two spiritual practices (scriptures & prayers) perfectly?
Then, a bold thought took hold in my brain.
Perfectly. As in every single day. As in nothing missing.
And so the idea of the "Perfect Year" was born. I committed right there that I would live a perfect year of daily prayer and scripture study. ~MB
And then his sweet assurance came. I was filled with the knowledge that he loved me enough that he was willing to suffer for every single thing I had done and would do. He loved me. Truly.
All he asked was that I would try. Each day. Try to be more obedient, and when I messed up, to turn to him, repent, and try again. ~MB
You can also look to your patriarchal blessing and see what is unfulfilled. ~MB
I will make a bold statement here and now. Some will not agree with me, but I believe that every woman who wants her family to be centered in the gospel should throw out the video game systems in her home-and throw them away where they cannot be retrieved.
But it is amazing to me how many women justify having these terrible toys in their homes. ~MB
Somehow I don't think the hymn advises, "Because I have been given much, I too must hoard!" ~MB
Mothers who know do less. They permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally. They allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home. Mothers who know are willing to live on less and consume less of the world's goods in order to spend more time with their children—more time eating together, more time working together, more time reading together, more time talking, laughing, singing, and exemplifying. These mothers choose carefully and do not try to choose it all. ~Julie B. Beck
I speak to you this morning not only about a little more effort, a little more self-discipline, a little more consecrated effort in the direction of excellence in your studies. I speak of it also in terms of your lives.
This is the great day of preparation for each of you. It is the time of beginning for something that will go on for as long as you live. I plead with you: Don't be a scrub! Rise to the high ground of excellence. You can do it. You may not be a genius. You may be lacking in some skills. But you can do better than you are now doing. You are students at BYU. Most of you are members of this great Church whose influence is now felt all over the world. You are people with a present and with a future. Don't muff the ball. Be excellent. ~Gordon B. Hinckley
Self-mastery is a rigorous process at best; too many of us want it to be effortless and painless. ~Thomas S. Monson
July 27, 2010
I think even more than what Merilee Boyack wrote in this book, I enjoyed her style of writing. It's a bit similar to how I like to write....1st person speaking to others about my own experiences. She even puts little asides in parentheses like I do sometimes. There WAS a lot of great advice for women, especially the tried but true "Don't be so hard on yourself." This book takes that phrase one step further and gives wonderful positive examples of how to do just that! I like it when things are clear cut and spelled out for me. I enjoy any book that makes me pause and reflect on my own life.
Here's a great quote from Toss the Guilt and Catch the Joy:
"We need to understand and recognize that we are queens in the kingdom of God. That is the true destiny for our mortal existence. As we come to believe at a deep level in our divine nature and in our divine worth, our perception of our weaknesses changes completely.
"When we do not have this understanding, we look at our weaknesses from the bottom up. From that perspective, it seems rather daunting, like looking at a mountain from its base. We are at a low, weak level, and we look up at the change needed and think, 'Oh, that's so hard. That's so beyond where I am.' Or we think something like, 'Making this change is going to be so difficult, I don't know if I can do it.'
"As we come to embrace our divine nature, however, our perspective completely changes and we can look at our weaknesses and think, 'Oh, these silly weaknesses...I want to improve them and make them strong, so I can bring my behavior and my skills and abilities up to the level of who I really am--a daughter of God.
"Our weaknesses look much less insurmountable this way. In fact, it just looks more like a course correction, or simply bringing all our skills, behaviors, and choices into line with who we really are. It seems like a much easier process when we approach it from the top looking down."
Here's a great quote from Toss the Guilt and Catch the Joy:
"We need to understand and recognize that we are queens in the kingdom of God. That is the true destiny for our mortal existence. As we come to believe at a deep level in our divine nature and in our divine worth, our perception of our weaknesses changes completely.
"When we do not have this understanding, we look at our weaknesses from the bottom up. From that perspective, it seems rather daunting, like looking at a mountain from its base. We are at a low, weak level, and we look up at the change needed and think, 'Oh, that's so hard. That's so beyond where I am.' Or we think something like, 'Making this change is going to be so difficult, I don't know if I can do it.'
"As we come to embrace our divine nature, however, our perspective completely changes and we can look at our weaknesses and think, 'Oh, these silly weaknesses...I want to improve them and make them strong, so I can bring my behavior and my skills and abilities up to the level of who I really am--a daughter of God.
"Our weaknesses look much less insurmountable this way. In fact, it just looks more like a course correction, or simply bringing all our skills, behaviors, and choices into line with who we really are. It seems like a much easier process when we approach it from the top looking down."
November 30, 2010
I liked this book. I was suprised. When I first opened the book I noticed one of the other books that this author had written and I groaned. It was a book highly recommended to me by an extreme over-achiever and the book (52 Weeks of Fun Family Service) definitely lived up to her high aspirations. Anyways, so I was trying to figure out this book by this over-achieving woman was not going to MAKE me feel guilty.
I am not an overly guilty person. I look at people who do everything and have everything perfect and I see a heart attack waiting to happen. Those people don't make me feel guilty about my lack of perfection. They make me feel sad inside, sad that they are crazy. But that sort of guilt wasn't so much what the book was about. It was a little, but that wasn't the focus.
What I liked the most was how the author suggested that when we see someone acting mean, shy, angry, loud, stupid, perfect, etc we need to think, "What's their problem?" That sounds snotty, huh? But that's not how you should read it. We need to think about them as Christ would, as in, "What problems are in their lives that are causing them to act that way?" and to be mindful that not everything is what it appears to be. Someone who seems perfect might have suffered terrible abuse and is hiding their pain. Or someone who seems to be a mess might actually be really on top of things if we base our judgement on what might have happened to them (ie, you might be a mess, but you'd be a worse mess if you weren't trying really hard.)
I am not an overly guilty person. I look at people who do everything and have everything perfect and I see a heart attack waiting to happen. Those people don't make me feel guilty about my lack of perfection. They make me feel sad inside, sad that they are crazy. But that sort of guilt wasn't so much what the book was about. It was a little, but that wasn't the focus.
What I liked the most was how the author suggested that when we see someone acting mean, shy, angry, loud, stupid, perfect, etc we need to think, "What's their problem?" That sounds snotty, huh? But that's not how you should read it. We need to think about them as Christ would, as in, "What problems are in their lives that are causing them to act that way?" and to be mindful that not everything is what it appears to be. Someone who seems perfect might have suffered terrible abuse and is hiding their pain. Or someone who seems to be a mess might actually be really on top of things if we base our judgement on what might have happened to them (ie, you might be a mess, but you'd be a worse mess if you weren't trying really hard.)
August 3, 2011
I like this book. The writing was not exceptional. The ideas were not startling or new. But the author herself is inspiring. I am amazed at her level of service and involvement in her community. I am impressed by her life-long quest for self-improvement and mastery over her weaknesses, such as her debilitating fears. I am tickled by her quirky sense of humor. I want to be more like Merrilee Boyack.
This book inspired me to think about what I could be perfectly obedient in for one year and thus make a good habit. I reminded me of the powerful “act as if” principle. It caused me to think about my fears and analyze how I could overcome them. It gave me concrete strategies for dealing with worries, such as letting go or saying “oh well,” “no biggie,” or “hang loose.” It taught me a question to ask my children and myself when we are tempted to judge: “I wonder what their story is?” I’m glad I read this book. I read a little each day, after I read my scriptures, and it was just what I needed at this moment in my life. I think I will read it again and refer to it as needed, and that is certainly one test of a good book.
This book inspired me to think about what I could be perfectly obedient in for one year and thus make a good habit. I reminded me of the powerful “act as if” principle. It caused me to think about my fears and analyze how I could overcome them. It gave me concrete strategies for dealing with worries, such as letting go or saying “oh well,” “no biggie,” or “hang loose.” It taught me a question to ask my children and myself when we are tempted to judge: “I wonder what their story is?” I’m glad I read this book. I read a little each day, after I read my scriptures, and it was just what I needed at this moment in my life. I think I will read it again and refer to it as needed, and that is certainly one test of a good book.
September 15, 2008
Wow. Already liked Merrilee Boyack, so I am not surprised I loved this book, but it was extremely meaningful to me, especially the chapters on being women of Being, not Comparison; Faith, not Fear; and Peace, not Worry. If there was a Worry Olympics or I'd be on the team. I have been working on these issues for a long time but I so appreciated Merrilee's fresh, encouraging voice. I had NO IDEA Merrilee herself had a fearful childhood; she seems so strong and confident now.
I think this book is for any woman in the Church; one previous poster said she thought it only seemed for married women with children. I do not think this is true; I know PRETEEN girls who are already comparing themselves to others and worrying themselves into a frazzle.
If we all read and applied what was in this book, it would be the End of Cattiness in Relief Society.
This is going on my "reread regularly" list.
I think this book is for any woman in the Church; one previous poster said she thought it only seemed for married women with children. I do not think this is true; I know PRETEEN girls who are already comparing themselves to others and worrying themselves into a frazzle.
If we all read and applied what was in this book, it would be the End of Cattiness in Relief Society.
This is going on my "reread regularly" list.
January 26, 2009
When I saw this book it caught my eye, but I decided to get it from the public library instead of purchase it since I was concerned that it might be filled with a lot of what I call "fluff" (motivating lines and "pats on the back" for being a woman). I was wrong. I went and bought it right away. There was a lot of "meat" in this book--discussion on the negative effects of comparisons, a battle plan to fight our fears, the "act as if" principle ("fake it til you make it"), and focusing on our divine self. This book is filled with great quotes so it is one to buy, mark up, and use again and again. I have used several great quotes in Relief Society lessons. There is also a fun bonus--a poem entitled "The Girl in a Whirl", poetry in the style of Dr. Seuss' "The Cat in the Hat" that talks about the modern LDS Supermom. Very funny.
February 16, 2009
This was a very quick read (I read it in a couple of hours on two Sundays). I really liked it. It's not that the information was groundbreaking, but that it was such a good reminder of how to find joy, written in a very clear realistic way. I especially liked her idea of approaching the things we'd like to improve in ourselves from a "top-down" perspective instead of a "bottom-up" like we usually do. In other words, if we start with the premise that we have a divine nature and that Heavenly Father already sees us that way, then turning weaknesses into strengths is really just bringing our skills and abilities up to the level of who we really are! Such a guilt free way to approach life. This is definitely a book worth reading. I'm sure I'll refer back to it again in life!
September 28, 2011
I've tried to read this book several times over the past couple of years and have always ended up putting it aside and never getting back to it. Determined to plow through this time I set aside 10 minutes a day to read this book over the past few weeks and have decided that Merrilee Boyack's sarcastic humor just isn't my thing. I enjoyed the Preface and Chapter 1 (which I've read several times), but it just went downhill after that. I skimmed ahead thinking there might be something in there I'd enjoy, but I never found it. I'll give it two stars because I like the idea and the intended message, but her writing style just isn't for me. Sorry, Merrillee. I'm sure you're a wonderful person.
I think I'll finally toss the guilt for never finishing this book and just get rid of it.
I think I'll finally toss the guilt for never finishing this book and just get rid of it.
August 20, 2013
I was given this book for Christmas probably three years ago. I started it right away and was really enjoying it, but then life happened and I forgot about it. Just recently I found it and set out to finish it. This book is full of great, practical, useful advice for getting rid of the guilt all us women have. I like her writing style, so it's actually fun reading too. I forgot all of what the first half of the book was about, but I remember I really enjoyed it and felt empowered to make positive changes (just like with the second half). I've decided to start reading it again right away. It's the kind of book you can just keep on hand and read a chapter every now and then to be reminded how to not let the stress of life take over! Definitely glad I actually own this one!
November 6, 2008
I am a few pages away from finishing this read up...the last few chapters are tough to get though. I fell as though it could have been a shorter book in length. They just don't hold my interest. Over all I like this book and advice it gives. One thing I am definitely taking to heart and taking action on is making the scripture reading goal she talks about. I need to create a habit so I am going to try her exercise out. She has a sense of humor and points out women qualities that are so true and real for us all. Worth reading for the reminders and encouragement of having a happier, more peaceful, sound life as a women and mom.
July 21, 2008
Where I work, they like us to keep up on the new products that are coming in the store. We have an employee library where I was able to borrow this book. Whilw I thought the author brought up some very valuable points, I didn't feel as though they were applicable to me yet. Most of it seemed to be geared towards woman with children. Also, the book talked about tossing the guilt, but I almost felt more guilty after reading it because of all the things I'm doing wrong. But, then again that may reflect on my age. I would still reccomend it to women, just not my age group.
January 11, 2011
I'm waffling between 4 & 5 stars. I LOVED this book! I like Merrilee Boyack's conversational writing style. Which is funny, because I HATED it in the first book I read by her. Guess it has grown on me?
My two MINOR complaints:
1. She mentions her Africa trip a billion times. (It WAS a life changing experience, I get it.)
2. I felt myself skimming through the last chapter or two. Though I did love the conclusion. I would've shortened the last chapter or two in favor of the conclusion.)
Recommend this to ALL women and mom's! Toss the guilt!!! TOSS IT!
My two MINOR complaints:
1. She mentions her Africa trip a billion times. (It WAS a life changing experience, I get it.)
2. I felt myself skimming through the last chapter or two. Though I did love the conclusion. I would've shortened the last chapter or two in favor of the conclusion.)
Recommend this to ALL women and mom's! Toss the guilt!!! TOSS IT!
September 15, 2011
I love reading books by Merrilee Boyack. I really have a hard time reading self help type books normally because I always feel guilty and depressed by my inability to improve. Besides the fact that they are usually boring. I am always inspired and uplifted and feel motivated and capable of improving myself while (and after) reading her books. I would totally recommend all her books to all my friends and family.
May 1, 2009
Ok, so i didn't actually read this book, but I took a class at Education Week from Merrilee that was essentially this book. It was fabulous! She is such a funny person! She is truly inspiring. She really helped me to start the journey that I have been on for almost a year now to be happy and not full of guilt. To make goals and to know that I am a wonderful person. If you cannot see her in person, this book is the second best thing!
July 8, 2011
I really liked this book. I found some of her stories to be a wee bit self-righteous, even though I'm sure that wasn't the author's intent. (Just wait 'til you get to the part about a 4,000 sq foot house!) Those instances aside, I picked up a lot of wisdom and some coping mechanisms that I'm sure I will use in life. I especially liked the chapter about changing from women of defiance to women of obedience. Great thoughts!
September 17, 2008
I picked this up at the BYU bookstore, and it really had a lot of great information in it. Merrilee is trying to help women to feel happy and forget about all the comparing, etc. She had some good tips and some helpful perspectives to share. I thought maybe I'd only skim a couple of chapters, but I read the whole thing. A good book to read before bed.
October 10, 2008
This is one of the books that has been my lifeline through the summer. Such sage wisdom but practical and from a womans point of view. Merrilee is very real and down to earth, someone you feel that you can share some of your Pandora's box items with and she will still love you and not judge you because she has been there herself. A breath of fresh air!
November 18, 2008
I feel like this title is a bit misleading. It seems like the content would be more lighthearted than it is. I think it's catchy, but the subtitle is really what the book is all about: A Woman's Guide to a Better Life. It's clearly about choosing the positive over the negative... a must read, in my opinion.
February 23, 2009
This book was much better than I thought it would be. I appreciated the author's ability to encourage us to improve while not adding to our guilt for the way we may be now. I have encouraged my daughter to read it, especially the chapters "Become women of faith, not fear" and "Become women of peace, not worry." In these trying times, we can all use those attitudes.
December 31, 2024
Really enjoyed this book...especially after just seeing Merrilee at Time Out for Women. The suggestions and advice she gives came just at the right time for me and helped me to see things in a different light. I can honestly say that this is one book that has altered my life..it may not be this way for everyone, but for me it was the right read at just the right time. Thanks Merrilee!
July 6, 2011
This book is good for helping you see some of the thinking errors we women engage in that make us feel guilty about stuff (from undone housework to taking time for ourselves). I really enjoyed several of the chapters, but it was a bit wordy and preachy at times. It's a quick read if you don't stop to do any of the introspective activities she suggests, which I feel guilty for not doing, haha!
May 21, 2012
My earlier 2 star rating of this book had to be a mistake; I loved this book and it's on my books-that-I-reread-all-the-time shelf. (What, you don't have one of those? :) Was talking about this book in Another Book Club with Bonnie and thought I was due for another read through, as soon as I get through my currently-reading mountain :)
September 9, 2008
I really enjoyed this book. You may feel a little like she's trying to sell you on going to Africa though, but she had some good experiences there that she shares. Feeling less guilty about things takes time but this is helpful:)
December 4, 2008
I really like this author and the way approaches things, but this book overwhelmed me and made me feel like I need a complete personality makeover. This book would be better enjoyed in small pieces - not read through from cover to cover. Ironically, it made me catch more guilt than joy.
November 11, 2008
It was a little harder to get through this book than it was to get through the other Merilee Boyack books I have read. I still enjoyed it and got some good ideas for improving my life, but it just wasn't a 'can't put it down' kind of a book. Maybe I'll revisit this at a later time in my life.
May 12, 2016
I thought this book had some pretty good ideas about decreasing stress, but generally I thought it was a little long and wordy. I just never really got excited about reading it, but it did have a few good insights I really liked.
October 11, 2008
This book was written for me! It was exactly what I needed to hear. I didn't think I was feeling guilty about life in general, but I was so wrong! It's given me a different view that I think I really needed right now.
November 4, 2008
I really did enjoy this book. It is a lot of common sense, but a good reminder. I agree with another reviewer that said that it slowed down towards the end, but it was still well worth the read. I love Merilee's no nonsense about things, and how she's not your typical "mormon woman".
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