My son is probably gay, Vol. 5

うちの息子はたぶんゲイ [Uchi no Musuko wa Tabun Gay] #5

by Okura, Alice Settembrini (Translator)

La signora Aoyama continua a osservare con sguardo attento ma riservato il cammino del figlio Hiroki, che ultimamente si è interessato anche alla danza. Che sia successo qualcosa con Asumi, una kohai che sembra nutrire un certo interesse per lui? Nel frattempo, col rientro del marito Akiyoshi, in famiglia si torna in quattro! Il racconto di una madre che segue con affetto la sua famiglia giunge al suo quinto e ultimo volume.

Genres: Manga, LGBT, Graphic Novels, Queer, Young Adult, Comics, Slice Of Life

136 pages, Paperback

First published February 21, 2023

About the author

Okura (おくら) is a Japanese mangaka.

Reviews

[Alice Oseman]

This series is just SO delightful, I'm very sad it's over. And a lovely surprise to see an asexual character in this volume!

[Phu · Rating 4 out of 5]

Chà, không giống như mình nghĩ, mình đã nghĩ rằng vol cuối sẽ cao trào, "bùng nổ" cơ, nhưng mọi thứ không như thế nhưng mình nghĩ cách bộ này kết thúc như vậy cũng hợp lí rồi. Ai cũng thay đổi, phát triển một cách âm thầm - tốt hơn mỗi ngày.

Vẫn như các vol trước, vol.5 vẫn tập trung vào chủ đề "sở thích" và "quan niệm. Cứ sống với sở thích, đam mê của mình vì nó chẳng làm hại đến ai; mình thích việc tác giả chèn thêm yếu tố mạng xã hội trong vol này. Ai cũng có quan niệm về cái gọi là "bình thường", kể cả trong giới LGBT họ cũng có cái gọi là phải "gay" hay "không gay", mọi thứ đều có sự nhìn nhận nhất định. Và lời nói là cũng là một điều hết sức quan trọng, suy nghĩ trước khi nói là tốt nhất!

Đã là vol cuối, mình vẫn muốn có thêm nhiều đoạn về Asumi hơn cơ. Dù thực sự là đã tới kết thúc và nó không như mình nghĩ, nhưng gia đình Aoyama đã thay đổi và gần nhau hơn. Hiroki là người có sự thay đổi rõ trong vol cuối. Trong các vol trước Hiroki luôn tự ti về bản thân, nhưng mình luôn thấy Hiroki vẫn âm thầm thay đổi bản thân một cách tốt nhất, có lẽ Hiroki chưa nhận ra điều đó hay cậu ấy chưa thật sự "come out" nhưng mọi người đều quan tâm, yêu thương Hiroki thực lòng.Tomoko có những lúc nghi ngờ về bản thân bà ấy, trong câu chuyện về quá khứ của Tomoko và cho đến hiện tại, người mẹ ấy vẫn giữ được tính cách ấy - luôn muốn mọi người xung quanh được thoải mái và sống với những gì họ thích. Yuri trông lạnh lùng nhưng thực sự là một người thú vị, trong mấy vol trước mình cũng đã đoán ra tính hướng của Yuri rồi cơ. Và đã là kết thúc, ở vol cuối gia đình Aoyama có nhiều khoảnh khắc hết sức ý nghĩa, lần này mình thấy người cha Akiyoshi có nhiều "đất diễn" hơn, ông ấy san sẻ cho vợ và cố gắng hiểu hơn về các con - nên phải nói rằng gia đình Aoyama thay đổi, trợ giúp, bước đi cùng nhau đi trên một cuộc sống, xã hội có nhiều thay đổi mỗi ngày. Tất cả cùng nhau tạo nên một cuộc sống nhận thức rõ ràng và đầy đủ hơn, tử tế và tôn trọng người khác ^^

[Maia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm so glad the main character finally confronted her husband on his careless homophobic remarks! Also I loved the story like of Hiroki getting into a girl idol group named Soup=Soup, what a perfect name for a group. If this is the last book of the series I am satisfied :) If there are more I will read them!

[Grapie Deltaco · Rating 4 out of 5]

A sweet finale that makes sure to still give agency to our narrator’s son when it comes to his identity while also exploring the tricky conversation we’ve been waiting for these parents to have on the matter.

I’m so sad to say goodbye


CW: casual homophobia from parent

[Rebecca · Rating 5 out of 5]

It doesn't get much warmer and lovelier than this. Tomoko is still pretty sure her older son is gay, and as he's getting closer to being comfortable coming out, his father's out of town work ends, and his thoughtless words risk undoing the safe environment Tomoko has been building. But he loves his children, and as he remarks to a coworker after a workshop on LGBTQIA+ rights, this involves everyone - meaning that he, too, has a role to play in overcoming his biases and prejudices to create a safe world.

We don't know for certain at the end of the series is Hiroki is gay - but it doesn't matter. We see Yuri looking up "asexual" on his phone, trying to figure himself out, and that's important, because while Tomoko has been all-in on protecting Hiroki, she hasn't quite figured out the other letters in the acronym yet, and she doesn't realize that her other son could also be queer, just of another kind. (And boy, is it easy to feel like there's something wrong with you if you don't like anyone, especially at that age.) But what's important is their parents' growth and continued commitment to standing by their children. You love who you have, not who you thought they would be.

Love is, as they say, love. What often gets left out is that that goes for familial and platonic love as well as sexual and romantic. Creator Okura says that he hopes that someday people will read this series and wonder why Hiroki tried so hard to hide his queerness, and I share that hope. We should never be ashamed of who we do or don't find attractive, and we all deserve to be loved for exactly who we are.

[Rod Brown · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was disappointed to find that this is the final volume of the series, but at the same time it seems a good place to stop because I could see myself getting tired of the slow and low-key nature of the story if it were extended much further.

Some plot threads are resolved, while others are left floating in the ambiguity in which this series revels. It stays true to itself to the end, foregoing a big splashy dramatic plot development for more slice-of-life incremental reveals and a focus on inner growth.

A very nice series.

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a wholesome series! Of course Mom 'knows' about her high school son. I truly like every single character in this series. They are so consistently representative of some of the personality types that truly exist. I really don't want to say more about them and inflect my own views about them. It is great the way each person unfolds who they are.

This book is mentally helpful for everyone to read. Whether you identify with any one particular character, or simply if you've lived daily with them, their inner honesty is so refreshing.

A very strong 5*

[Sam · Rating 2 out of 5]

What a rushed ending oh my god??

[Meg · Rating 4 out of 5]

series is overall enjoyable, doesnt necessarily have a conclusion but its open ended in a good way

[Cee · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series is literally the sweetest and most heartwarming thing I've ever read in my life. The care, the character growth, the acceptance, and allowing characters to BE who they are without forcing them to come out or do something huge... I love it. I also love the ending author's note and hope as well we one day end up in a more accepting world.

[Bailey · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series is such a delight and I'm so sad it's over! I adore this series and this was wrapped up perfectly. I love the asexual representation as well as the sweet relationship these siblings have with their mom and with each other.

[Elizabeth A · Rating 3 out of 5]

Translated from the Japanese by Leighann Harvey.

The final book in this YA Manga wrapped up several plot lines but left others open ended. Kinda like life I guess. Dad is back living full time at home which changes the family dynamics. While the ending felt rushed I enjoyed spending time with this family and the themes explored. Mom and Yuri continue to be my fave characters.

Ratings for Okura books
I Think Our Son Is Gay, Vol. 1 = 3
I Think Our Son Is Gay, Vol. 2 = 3
I Think Our Son Is Gay, Vol. 3 = 4
I Think Our Son Is Gay, Vol. 4 = 2
I Think Our Son Is Gay, Vol. 5 = 3

[Dustyloup · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5-4.75* lu en français
What a delightful series! it's quite rare for me to rate the last volume higher than the others but the author did such a good job of tying up loose ends without being heavy handed.
I'm glad my son warned me it's the last volume or I would've been wrecked!

[Marco Khrenek Freddi · Rating 4 out of 5]

“My son is probably gay” si conclude con questo quinto volume, all’interno del quale vengono esplorati numerosi temi, dall’accettazione di sé e degli altri ai problemi dovuti all’indottrinamento che la società impone fino dall’infanzia (ad esempio il comportamento del padre del protagonista che, candidamente, si complimenta con il compagno del collega della moglie perché “non sembra gay”, per poi rendersi conto di aver detto qualcosa come minimo inappropriato, ai timori della madre di Hiroki di aver fatto outing al figlio chiedendo al marito come reagirebbe se il figlio fosse gay.
Incidentalmente viene toccato anche il tema dell’autocomprensione, nella fattispecie in quanto il fratello minire di Hiroki comincia a sua volta a farsi domande in merito alla propria sessualità e sulla possibilità di essere asessuale.
Alla fine la domanda che la madre si pone non avrà una risposta, anche se Hiroki sembra in qualche modo darla senza darla, ma con una calma che per il resto dell’opera non aveva. In ogni caso, forse, sapere con certezza se Hiroki sia o meno gay non è nemmeno importante; ciò che invece lo è e il percorso che lui e la sua famiglia hanno fatto e che li porta ad avvicinarsi a quella consapevolezza che essere gay (o bisessuali, asessuali o qualsiasi altro orientamento) è una cosa del tutto normale.
L’autore poi ha voluto chiudere il volume proprio con la speranza che in futuro non sia più necessario nascondere il proprio orientamento e che la sua opera possa divenire solo la rappresentazione di un’epoca conclusa.

[Lauren Stoolfire · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series has been delightful and volume five was the perfect finale. Tomoko is a great mom and I definitely appreciated the effort that Akiyoshi was putting in as well. As much as I love the adult characters in this, I'd say my favorite has been Yuri. The asexual representation means a lot. Overall, I'll miss all of these characters and I'll have to try more from Okura in the future.

[Travis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sad that this is the final volume but this series was so good.

[Christine Joy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm so sad that it's over! But I'm so happy the story has concluded and the message is so wonderful and beautifully expressed!! I am going to recommend this series over and over until my lungs hurt!
Thank you, Okura-sensei for your impactful social masterpiece(˃̣̣̥ w ˂̣̣̥)

[Blake the Book Eater · Rating 4 out of 5]

A really sweet ending to a wholesome series. I do admit that I wanted a little more from it, but I think the themes that Okura was trying to get across definitely made this series worth the time spent reading it!

[❝ rachel ❞ · Rating 5 out of 5]

a beautiful final volume to one of my favorite manga series. i just love how topics are broached and how characters make mistakes and learn from them. i’m gonna miss all of these characters so much!!

[beenis · Rating 5 out of 5]

society: which would you rather have... gay son or aroace son

tomoko: both. both is good

[Elisabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 stars. So sad it's finished! What a lovely little series. Really appreciate the aro/ace rep as well!

[dar · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely adored this series

[Paula (lovebookscl) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Me quieren hacer llorar y yo no soy fuerte.

En este tomo por fin Tomoko tiene una conversación seria con su marido. Y debo decir que me asusté, pero me alegra como resultó todo y de ahí que me salieron lágrimas. El camino con el padre (y sus comentarios) fue difícil, pero me alegro que esta sea la conclusión. Y sí, ESA escena me dió cringe, tuve que pausar el manga durante unos segundos jajaja

“This new world is the one we’re all living in right now. We can’t pretend it doesn’t have anything to do with us”

“I think our son is gay. And all I want is for my precious kids, gay or otherwise, to be happy”

Otros momentos que amé:
Ver todo el apoyo que tiene Hiroki con su baile
La importancia de respetar la honestidad de otros, y devolver eso con la misma compasión y honestidad.
La conversación entre Asumi y Hiroki
La sonrisa poderosa de Yuri jajaja
El padre siendo un aliado de la forma menos disimulada posible jajaja
La asexualidad de Yuri

Mención sin honor, con odio y rabia: la conversación con las “amigas” de Tomoko. Escupitajo.

Encontré que el final fue lindo, aunque siento que hay varias cosas que quedaron por explorar. De todas formas, el mensaje principal se logró bien y quedé contenta.

[Jack Reynolds · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm very happy with this ending. At the end of the day, Hiroki being gay or not isn't what's important. I'd say Okura's final message/s were understanding where best to support your potentially queer kids as a parent and how to find community.

[quinnster · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm really sad this series has come to an end. I was a little worried how Akiyoshi was going to react to Tomoko telling him she thought Hiroki might be gay, but I really loved the way everything turned out.

[Debo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Did this make me cry? It most certainly did. Concluding the series, this brought all the plot lines together heartwarmingly and without a big finale - in fact, I think the unhurried casual nature of the conclusion was the best part. Just before the ace coded-ness becoming canon, that was also neat.
I loved this a lot!

[Liv · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series isn’t perfect (is any?) but I thoroughly enjoyed it. Okura says in the afterword that they want this story “to be something that could only have been written right now. And in the future, I want people to think…[quote bubble from fictional audience: “why is he so desperate to hide his gayness? It’s not like it’s weird or anything!”] when they read it.” And that’s it exactly. That’s the message of the story.

I was sad not to see more of Hiroki and Yuri’s stories but they weren’t the main character, Tomoko was. She was always openhearted and open-minded, but she needed to figure things out to get it. I loved that she dealt with a lot of homophobia and questions and awfulness but she shielded her kids from it. And she wasn’t pushy or entitled about it. Whenever Hiroki accidentally almost outed himself, she was calm and told him she loved him regardless. Or she helped him find the words to safely guard his secret.

She allowed Hiroki to grow up loved and protected while learning from him just as he did from her. Her questions about queerness may seem homophobic at times but she really was trying to piece the whole picture together without forcing her son to do it for her. She could’ve waited and ignored things, but instead she was patient and let him blossom at his own pace.

The final volume is the most focused on Tomo, with Akiyoshi finally home to help her work through things. This series made me tear up many times. I wish every parent of a queer teenager (every parent period tbh) questioned things as Tomo did. Akiyoshi was much worse, but her gentle corrections helped him change as well. I wish every queer child had a parent like Tomo working alongside them to support, protect, and understand them.

[Noah de Campos Neto · Rating 5 out of 5]

I couldn't put down the last volume of this series, and I really hope it falls into the hands of the readers who need this series the most. There were moments where I teared up from sheer joy, especially seeing how accepting the mom was. The characters go through such incredible growth throughout the series, and it's a powerful exploration of coming out and being true to yourself. Honestly, it's one of the most moving stories on this topic that I've ever read. This series is a gem for readers of all ages. 🌈

[Sai · Rating 5 out of 5]

This series about a mother who suspects one of her sons to be gay will always have a special place in my heart. >_< I think the first volume and this last one are the best ones. In the first, the mom grapples with the possibility of having a gay son; in this final volume, it is then the dad's turn, which I have been anticipating since the dad is more conservative. I think the series was truthful in its portrayal of the parents while remaining sweet and light. I hope to find more graphic novels like this that tackle parents of other LGBTQI people :-)

[jude · Rating 5 out of 5]

this was the last volume im in tears 😭