Lady Sunflower: stories, songs, and poems from the desk of kill.gertrude

by Sierra Shuck-Sparer, Chloe Tyler (Illustrator)

Lady Sunflower is an achingly poignant collection written by Sierra Shuck-Sparer when she found herself grappling with the high-risk medulloblastoma. At the age of fifteen, Sierra was thrust into her harrowing battle against Gertrude (the name she gave her cancer). She faced relentless treatments and surgeries all while trying to retain her identity as a teenager heading into her college years. Sierra chronicled her journey through diagnosis, relapses, and treatment stages using a remarkable blend of heart-rending poetry, introspective essays and songs, zines, and curated playlists. This collection is a radiant call to raise awareness about pediatric cancer and a moving glimpse into Sierra’s humorous, heartbreaking, and sanguine view of the world around her.

Genres: Poetry, Nonfiction, Memoir

172 pages, Paperback

Published March 12, 2024

Reviews

[Ellen Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

I actually met this young lady at the Southern Festival of Books in Nashville this fall, and was so inspired by her presence and writing! I felt lucky to buy a copy of her illustrated journal, which is an authentic version of a cancer patient’s experiences with diagnosis, chemo, radiation, remission, and relapse. I pray she recovers fully and succeeds in her goals of completing her degree at Georgia Tech and earning her medical degree. Recommend this to anyone going through cancer treatment or serving as a caregiver.

[Blair · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just absolutely beautiful.

[RITA BUTTERFIELD · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sierra Shuck-Sparer is an inspiration. For sure her journal entries, poetry, and lyrics will be useful for kids and families struggling with a pediatric diagnosis and treatment. But this book will also be a source of comfort for anyone struggling with a difficult situation and feeling like “the only one.” For those of us without such challenges, Shuck-Sparer’s words remind us to live our lives fully and to love life.

[Emily Briano · Rating 5 out of 5]

A magnificent achievement from Sierra, whose time with us was far too short. Sierra captures the pain, sadness, horror, and despair of cancer while still somehow holding on to hope. This book is a miracle, a way for Sierra's story to live on and keep her memory alive.

[Gary Sturm · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book everyone should read. It will touch your heart and soul.

[Kelley Segars · Rating 5 out of 5]

I admire Sierra for being able to create this beautiful book - it surely will help so many people and families who are going through the same difficult journey.

[Tina Rosling · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sierra writes beautifully and with the passion and fury of a young person facing the unimaginable. Her book transcends cancer and lends strength and courage to all of us facing hard challenges. I loved it and will read it again.

[Caroline Ivester · Rating 5 out of 5]

This collection of poems, short essays, song lyrics, and playlists tells a beautiful memoir of Sierra's life. People who see beauty and goodness in everything are so special. To remain hopeful and to love life as deeply as Sierra did while undergoing brain cancer treatments is really inspiring.

I lost my older brother last year to the same type of brain cancer that Sierra had, medulloblastoma. Like Sierra, he rarely complained, but there was really a lot more going on inside that he never let show. This book showed me what he felt too. Cancer really sucks.

Rest in peace Sierra, you will always be remembered. Thank you for writing this book, it is really meaningful to me ❤️

"I'm not scared of dying, but I'm sad of not living."

[Beth · Rating 5 out of 5]

So often, people with cancer get reduced to stereotypes of being "brave" or "a fighter," which can do a real disservice to them by masking their true feelings about and experiences with cancer. Sierra's writings peel back that cover and give us a raw, honest look at what it's like to face cancer, and it gives us a chance to sit with her and bear witness. She has a remarkable way with words and expressions, and I feel richer having read them.

[Amber Wessies Owrey · Rating 5 out of 5]

A raw real look at childhood cancer. Sierra shares her personal thoughts and experiences with brain cancer. The book covers basically a 4-year period and is the result of her Make-A-Wish. Definitely recommend to better understand the experiences, emotions, struggles, pain, etc. associated with cancer treatment.

[Alison Buchan · Rating 5 out of 5]

A uniquely authentic, creative and heart-stirring peek into one amazing young woman’s cancer journey. Sierra made the world a brighter place and everyone who knew her was the better for it. This book exemplifies who she was - witty, caring, cleverly funny, a gifted artist, a realistic and a role model. Read this book!

[Amy Porter · Rating 5 out of 5]

The warm, earnest spirit of a keen young mind and generous heart permeate every entry of this beautiful, poetic work. It is both a candid memoir and a searing testimony to resilience. Lady Sunflower will stay with you long after you read her final entry

[Jamie · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an amazing young lady. This book is such a window into the life of a young person with cancer. What a gift this book is. 💜

[Josie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sierra is such a beautiful and kind person, and that reflects in this wonderful piece of work. Everyone needs to read Lady Sunflower.

[Jane Barden · Rating 5 out of 5]

Though I’ve had this book for a couple of weeks, I’ve been unable to pick it up since Sierra passed away. This is her insightful and heartbreaking reflection on her journey.

[Tasha · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is beautiful. Reading it only once isn't enough.

[Melissa Stein · Rating 4 out of 5]

So good but so so sad :(

[Glenda]

Read as part of the NCTE Children’s Poetry Awards Committee.

[Dahlia Barton · Rating 5 out of 5]

Can’t speak highly enough of this book and of Sierra. A reminder to find joy in the everyday and courageously and unabashedly live your life.

[Reader · Rating 5 out of 5]

The past 2 years I have spent a lot of time in hospitals and feeling alone in my experience. This book made me laugh, cry, and think. It also made me feel so much less alone.

[Helen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Powerful. Honest. Beautiful.

[SOYAMRG · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Written by a teen who has undergone multiple periods of chemo for brain tumors, this book is a compilation of poems, essays, playlists, recommendations for dealing with chemo, and more. She has named her cancer Gertrude, and she is both deeply serious and also light-hearted about living with this terrible disease."

The book would be a wonderful read for any person facing cancer, or for their loved ones, but especially for a young person facing this disease. Pen and ink illustrations throughout.

I looked up her name after reading the book, and she died at age 20 in March 2024.

D.B.
Retired YS Librarian

[Kim Leber Bayne · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderfully written and powerful, you'll feel Sierra's feelings, you'll laugh, you'll cry - worth the read