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224 pages, Hardcover
First published June 4, 2024
No Sam (Sam for short) is a little pug with grand ideas. Sam knows that he comes with a very specific set of skills perfectly honed to protect his new family, the Petersons, from danger!
"My name is NO SAM! and I am a human being...Since the dawn of time, you see, human beings and naked-monkey-things have an unspoken contract..."
But the transition to the new home isn't going as smoothly as the Petersons want (Sam, of course, is confident that everything is aces).
"...we had made it all the way home without being attacked by any of the monsters or aliens or bandits that I'd seen on the news. It was sheer luck we made it here alive at all...these poor defenseless naked-monkey-things will never have to worry about their safety again. NO SAM! is on the job!"
"When they opened the front door, I ran inside and almost fainted with joy. Right there was the most beautiful pooping rug I'd ever seen."Despite the pooping rug, peeing couch, chewing chair and porcelain drinking fountain room, Sam knows he can't let his guard down for any minute.