What do you think?
Rate this book
I'm Mostly Here to Enjoy Myself: One Woman's Pursuit of Pleasure in Paris
When you’re a woman smack in so-called “middle age” you are not promised anything at all other than that everything will get worse. But what if everything you’ve been told is a lie.
Come to Paris, August 2021, when the City of Lights was still empty of tourists, and a thirst for long overdue pleasure gripped those who wandered its streets.
After New York City emptied out in March 2020, Glynnis MacNicol, aged 46, unmarried with no children, spent 16 months alone in her tiny Manhattan apartment. The isolation was punishing. A year without touch. Women are warned of invisibility as they age, but this was an extreme loneliness no one can prepare you for. When the opportunity to sublet a friend’s apartment in Paris arose, MacNicol jumped on it. Leaving felt like less of a risk than a necessity.
What follows is a decadent, unexpected journey into one woman’s pursuit of radical enjoyment.
The weeks in Paris are filled with friendship and food and sex. There is dancing on the Seine; a plethora of gooey cheese; midnight bike rides through empty Paris; handsome men; afternoons wandering through the empty Louvre; nighttime swimming in the ocean off a French island. And yes, plenty of nudity.
In the spirit of Deborah Levy and Annie Ernaux, I’m Mostly Here to Enjoy Myself is an intimate, insightful, powerful, and endlessly pleasurable memoir of an intensely lived experience whose meaning and insight expands far beyond the personal narrative. MacNicol is determined to document the beauty, excess, and triumph of a life that does not require permission.
The pursuit of enjoyment is a political act, both a right and a responsibility. Enjoying yourself—as you are—is not something the world tells you is possible, but it is.
Here’s the proof.
Come to Paris, August 2021, when the City of Lights was still empty of tourists, and a thirst for long overdue pleasure gripped those who wandered its streets.
After New York City emptied out in March 2020, Glynnis MacNicol, aged 46, unmarried with no children, spent 16 months alone in her tiny Manhattan apartment. The isolation was punishing. A year without touch. Women are warned of invisibility as they age, but this was an extreme loneliness no one can prepare you for. When the opportunity to sublet a friend’s apartment in Paris arose, MacNicol jumped on it. Leaving felt like less of a risk than a necessity.
What follows is a decadent, unexpected journey into one woman’s pursuit of radical enjoyment.
The weeks in Paris are filled with friendship and food and sex. There is dancing on the Seine; a plethora of gooey cheese; midnight bike rides through empty Paris; handsome men; afternoons wandering through the empty Louvre; nighttime swimming in the ocean off a French island. And yes, plenty of nudity.
In the spirit of Deborah Levy and Annie Ernaux, I’m Mostly Here to Enjoy Myself is an intimate, insightful, powerful, and endlessly pleasurable memoir of an intensely lived experience whose meaning and insight expands far beyond the personal narrative. MacNicol is determined to document the beauty, excess, and triumph of a life that does not require permission.
The pursuit of enjoyment is a political act, both a right and a responsibility. Enjoying yourself—as you are—is not something the world tells you is possible, but it is.
Here’s the proof.
288 pages, Hardcover
First published June 11, 2024
1064 people are currently reading
32721 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,152 reviews
March 21, 2025
4.5 stars
One of the most enjoyable books I’ve read in a while! I took great pleasure in reading this memoir about a woman satisfying herself during her trip in Paris. Glynnis MacNicol writes with precision and feeling about being a childfree, non-married single woman in her mid-40’s defying society’s expectations that all women’s lives and stories end with marriage and/or kids. As someone who’s more femme and childfree by choice and romantically single, I found myself nodding along and sighing in “yes, she gets it” throughout this memoir. I loved her writing about her friendships, her considerations of her finances, and her decision to chart her own course.
I believe this book is also relevant given Vice President JD Vance’s comments about romantically single, childfree women being “childless cat ladies” and his statements that parents should get more votes than nonparents. I turn 30 in two months and definitely feel the amatonormative and heteronormative pressure to get married and have kids. MacNicol’s memoir in which she literally centers her pursuit of pleasure defies patriarchal notions that women’s purpose is solely to serve or care for other people. She’s also generally self-aware about her privilege and positionality. Sure, there were a few passages that could have been more concise or removed and an instance of an interaction with a younger woman that could have been probed more thoroughly, but, as a whole I found her writing mindful and astute.
I’m not a travel memoir fan but liked this book nonetheless for its thesis on pursuing pleasure and defying society’s expectations. I may be interested in reading a memoir every decade by MacNicol as I also enjoyed her memoir No One Tells You This which I read back in 2018.
One of the most enjoyable books I’ve read in a while! I took great pleasure in reading this memoir about a woman satisfying herself during her trip in Paris. Glynnis MacNicol writes with precision and feeling about being a childfree, non-married single woman in her mid-40’s defying society’s expectations that all women’s lives and stories end with marriage and/or kids. As someone who’s more femme and childfree by choice and romantically single, I found myself nodding along and sighing in “yes, she gets it” throughout this memoir. I loved her writing about her friendships, her considerations of her finances, and her decision to chart her own course.
I believe this book is also relevant given Vice President JD Vance’s comments about romantically single, childfree women being “childless cat ladies” and his statements that parents should get more votes than nonparents. I turn 30 in two months and definitely feel the amatonormative and heteronormative pressure to get married and have kids. MacNicol’s memoir in which she literally centers her pursuit of pleasure defies patriarchal notions that women’s purpose is solely to serve or care for other people. She’s also generally self-aware about her privilege and positionality. Sure, there were a few passages that could have been more concise or removed and an instance of an interaction with a younger woman that could have been probed more thoroughly, but, as a whole I found her writing mindful and astute.
I’m not a travel memoir fan but liked this book nonetheless for its thesis on pursuing pleasure and defying society’s expectations. I may be interested in reading a memoir every decade by MacNicol as I also enjoyed her memoir No One Tells You This which I read back in 2018.
June 24, 2024
I read a lot of memoirs of ex-pats who move to Europe. I AM one of those ex-pats who moved to Europe so maybe that is why most of these books appeal to me. But then there are some in which the author makes sure to let you know that she is cooler and hipper than you are, or will ever be, because she rents the same apartment every year in Paris. And lives like a local (you don't really, but whatever)! And has real friends who know the best places to go! And won't tell you the name because she doesn't want tourists ruining the place. This book and this author are in this category. I never warmed up to her or her friends. But I gave it an extra point for giving the hint about the Île d'Yeu even though she didn't want to give the name out because "tourists".
June 18, 2024
I rarely read a book that is precisely what I want it to be, but this memoir definitely was. In the summer of 2021, the author traveled to Paris for, as it says on the tin, pleasure. And my, can she write about pleasure.
Whether describing sex or food or art or friendship or cycling, MacNicol evokes sensation more viscerally than I've read in quite a while. She writes especially poignantly about how rare it is to tell and find these stories about single women in their 40s, as she was when the events of this book took place.
The audiobook was very well narrated by the author. I also definitely want to check out her previous memoir.
Whether describing sex or food or art or friendship or cycling, MacNicol evokes sensation more viscerally than I've read in quite a while. She writes especially poignantly about how rare it is to tell and find these stories about single women in their 40s, as she was when the events of this book took place.
The audiobook was very well narrated by the author. I also definitely want to check out her previous memoir.
August 9, 2024
This book is 80% mundane details about getting to Paris, random stream of consciousness style musings, and maybe 20% actual juicy details about visiting Paris.
This reads like the inside of the average person's head -- there's so much thinking and pondering. Just when we arrive at an actual sensory detail about Paris, here comes a ten page explanation or analysis of the detail.
Completely turned off when MacNicol retches about a young woman she meets who thinks too much regarding just about everything. The girl, half of MacNicol's age, describes herself as a writer and MacNicol has to fight against the urge to tell the girl that MacNicol herself is a REAL DEAL writer. Dear God. MacNicol semi mocks her for over thinking when this entire book is just endless pages of MacNicol's random thoughts?
Meh. Not the fun, loose, edgy memoir that I was hoping for unfortunately.
For all the times she mentions "touch" I want to scream. [Needing TOUCH, wanting TOUCH] Not to be touched, mind you, just...touch. I think there might be a proprioception issue that bears looking into.
This reads like the inside of the average person's head -- there's so much thinking and pondering. Just when we arrive at an actual sensory detail about Paris, here comes a ten page explanation or analysis of the detail.
Completely turned off when MacNicol retches about a young woman she meets who thinks too much regarding just about everything. The girl, half of MacNicol's age, describes herself as a writer and MacNicol has to fight against the urge to tell the girl that MacNicol herself is a REAL DEAL writer. Dear God. MacNicol semi mocks her for over thinking when this entire book is just endless pages of MacNicol's random thoughts?
Meh. Not the fun, loose, edgy memoir that I was hoping for unfortunately.
For all the times she mentions "touch" I want to scream. [Needing TOUCH, wanting TOUCH] Not to be touched, mind you, just...touch. I think there might be a proprioception issue that bears looking into.
July 4, 2024
This is a quick read that has some really appealing elements to it, and some that don’t appeal at all. Holistically speaking it’s mostly a dating memoir and an updated Eat, Pray, Love of sorts, neither of which holds much appeal for me and both of which feel overdone and unnecessary in the memoir space.
What’s good here is MacNicol’s adventurous spirit, which comes through strongly throughout the book, as well as the more travel-driven content relating to Paris and the surrounding area.
It’s interesting that the author mentions that she was asked when pitching the book to explain what exactly it was trying to say, because that’s pretty much the question I had after I finished it. I suppose MacNicol is mostly saying “I’m free to do what I want and I’m going to indulge that,” which is a great thing to do for oneself.
But while I liked her and am therefore happy for her that she was able to do this, I don’t think it’s an especially worthy subject for a book if the rest of the content doesn’t really prop up the focus on a writer’s personal life philosophy.
The writing is fine, though a little too conversational for my taste, and most of the jokes don’t land, when they’re there at all. I expect I would like MacNicol a lot more as a friend in real life than I do as a memoirist, though I would certainly admire her gutsy decision making either way.
*I received an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.*
What’s good here is MacNicol’s adventurous spirit, which comes through strongly throughout the book, as well as the more travel-driven content relating to Paris and the surrounding area.
It’s interesting that the author mentions that she was asked when pitching the book to explain what exactly it was trying to say, because that’s pretty much the question I had after I finished it. I suppose MacNicol is mostly saying “I’m free to do what I want and I’m going to indulge that,” which is a great thing to do for oneself.
But while I liked her and am therefore happy for her that she was able to do this, I don’t think it’s an especially worthy subject for a book if the rest of the content doesn’t really prop up the focus on a writer’s personal life philosophy.
The writing is fine, though a little too conversational for my taste, and most of the jokes don’t land, when they’re there at all. I expect I would like MacNicol a lot more as a friend in real life than I do as a memoirist, though I would certainly admire her gutsy decision making either way.
*I received an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.*
August 31, 2024
Blah, blah, blah. So you’ve been to Paris a few times and you’ve hooked up for some raunchy or rough sex? I wanted to like it and I appreciate the soul searching journey it was for her. But I was turned off early on by her superiority attitude and assumptions that anyone who is married or has children has a miserable life and can’t experience the joys of independence that she has. Get over yourself.
July 3, 2024
My first by the author; did not enjoy.
While the jacket describes that a surprising opportunity led to a Covid-era sublet in Paris, the text itself reveals this “opportunity” was a vacation rental.
The memoir brings the most energy to describing dating app messaging and subsequent hookups, contrasted with the lonely months of a pandemic spent in a Manhattan apartment. I would have appreciated this more if the writer had been a bit more personal; it felt very mechanical and lacked nuance for me.
While I appreciate her message that a woman of 46 may focus on other things than a husband and children, I wish the writer had shown a brighter light on the plethora of opportunities the world offers a woman of her income and education. This dissonance was most distressing in the book’s attempt to shake deeper meaning from her French vacation as she considers the lives of many other independent women (Simone de Beauvoir? Never read her!) and muses superficially that her life has never offered her experiences that caused her deep reflection or growth, flitting from her lack of insight into war, directly to the insight she’s gained from Netflix.
My review feels a little humorless but maybe the most dissonant thing about the book was that while the writer seemed both a fun and funny person, the writing was never funny. It wasn’t observational or wicked or witty, more scholarly and preachy.
Many readers I respect did enjoy this memoir so perhaps its tone and content were just a miss for me as an individual.
While the jacket describes that a surprising opportunity led to a Covid-era sublet in Paris, the text itself reveals this “opportunity” was a vacation rental.
The memoir brings the most energy to describing dating app messaging and subsequent hookups, contrasted with the lonely months of a pandemic spent in a Manhattan apartment. I would have appreciated this more if the writer had been a bit more personal; it felt very mechanical and lacked nuance for me.
While I appreciate her message that a woman of 46 may focus on other things than a husband and children, I wish the writer had shown a brighter light on the plethora of opportunities the world offers a woman of her income and education. This dissonance was most distressing in the book’s attempt to shake deeper meaning from her French vacation as she considers the lives of many other independent women (Simone de Beauvoir? Never read her!) and muses superficially that her life has never offered her experiences that caused her deep reflection or growth, flitting from her lack of insight into war, directly to the insight she’s gained from Netflix.
My review feels a little humorless but maybe the most dissonant thing about the book was that while the writer seemed both a fun and funny person, the writing was never funny. It wasn’t observational or wicked or witty, more scholarly and preachy.
Many readers I respect did enjoy this memoir so perhaps its tone and content were just a miss for me as an individual.
July 21, 2024
This book contains moments of important insights and chapters of insufferableness. While I agree with MacNichol that women who choose to stay single and child free are less represented in our culture’s media, I’m not sure that her story is all that compelling a representation. She is at times mean, hypocritical, and immature while pursuing a very privileged trip to Paris. Maybe it is too soon for pandemic memoirs? There’s an assumption that we all felt the same sort of searing aloneness during Covid isolation but that experience really varied hard among people. Tying her story to other American expat female intellectuals is both interesting and maybe a reach. I just don’t know if this story needed telling or maybe Sex and the City Season 6 already told it? 2.5 stars
June 29, 2024
I loved MacNicol’s No One Tells You This, which approached her 40th year as an adventure into the unknown. This second memoir is similarly frank and intrepid as MacNicol examines the unconscious rules that people set for women in their mid-forties and gleefully flouts them, remaining single and childfree and delighting in the freedom that allows her to book a month in Paris on a whim. She knows that she is an anomaly for being “untethered”; “I am ready for anything. To be anyone.”
This takes place in August 2021, when some pandemic restrictions were still in force, and she found the city – a frequent destination for her over the years – drained of locals, who were all en vacances, and largely empty of tourists, too. Although there was still a queue for the Mona Lisa, she otherwise found the Louvre very quiet, and could ride her borrowed bike through the streets without having to look out for cars. She and her single girlfriends met for rosé-soaked brunches and picnics, joined outdoor dance parties and took an island break.
And then there was the sex. MacNicol joined a hook-up app called Fruitz and met all sorts of men. She refused to believe that, just because she was 46 going on 47, she should be invisible or demure. “All the attention feels like pure oxygen. Anything is possible.” Seeing herself through the eyes of an enraptured 27-year-old Italian reminded her that her body was beautiful even if it wasn’t what she remembered from her twenties (“there is, on average, a five-year gap between current me being able to enjoy the me in the photos”). The book’s title is something she wrote while messaging with one of her potential partners.
There are plenty of childless role models but you may have to look a bit harder for them. MacNicol does so by tracking down the Paris haunts of women writers such as Edith Wharton and Colette. She also interrogates this idea of women living a life of pleasure by researching the “odalisque” in 18th- and 19th-century art, as in the François Boucher painting on the cover. This was fun, provocative and thoughtful all at once; well worth seeking out for summer reading and armchair travelling.
Originally published on my blog, Bookish Beck.
This takes place in August 2021, when some pandemic restrictions were still in force, and she found the city – a frequent destination for her over the years – drained of locals, who were all en vacances, and largely empty of tourists, too. Although there was still a queue for the Mona Lisa, she otherwise found the Louvre very quiet, and could ride her borrowed bike through the streets without having to look out for cars. She and her single girlfriends met for rosé-soaked brunches and picnics, joined outdoor dance parties and took an island break.
And then there was the sex. MacNicol joined a hook-up app called Fruitz and met all sorts of men. She refused to believe that, just because she was 46 going on 47, she should be invisible or demure. “All the attention feels like pure oxygen. Anything is possible.” Seeing herself through the eyes of an enraptured 27-year-old Italian reminded her that her body was beautiful even if it wasn’t what she remembered from her twenties (“there is, on average, a five-year gap between current me being able to enjoy the me in the photos”). The book’s title is something she wrote while messaging with one of her potential partners.
There are plenty of childless role models but you may have to look a bit harder for them. MacNicol does so by tracking down the Paris haunts of women writers such as Edith Wharton and Colette. She also interrogates this idea of women living a life of pleasure by researching the “odalisque” in 18th- and 19th-century art, as in the François Boucher painting on the cover. This was fun, provocative and thoughtful all at once; well worth seeking out for summer reading and armchair travelling.
Originally published on my blog, Bookish Beck.
February 17, 2025
This book receives the honor of being the first book I am DNF-ing in the year of our Lord 2024. In short, the author is a self centered piece of work. I don't have the headspace or desire to indulge the author by reading any further. For example, she complains about new variants of COVID possibly ruining her trip. In the words of Kourtney (look what you made me do, I'm now quoting a Kardashian) "people are dying, Kim.". It comes across as really ignorant, shallow, and privileged that after isolation all she cares about is getting on a plane and finding guys to sleep with. While there is still a pandemic going on no less (she's mentioning masks and waves on COVID so she even knows this). And then write a book about it. I don't know how egocentric one has to be. I guess I was hoping for a little more self awareness, but I guess that's asking for too much nowadays. Oh well, c'est la vie.
June 16, 2024
i had higher hopes for this one. it’s basically a coming of age story of a single, childless woman in her mid-40s who went through peak covid in manhattan by herself and how going to paris for a few weeks in summer 2021 helped her move past that isolating time. the story was meandering and mostly mundane. in the end, i’m not sure if the author truly enjoyed herself or found that much pleasure.
2.75 stars.
2.75 stars.
June 20, 2024
More books about women unapologetically seeking and enjoying their own pleasure please.
March 5, 2024
I really enjoyed this book, Glynnis MacNicol writes beautifully about womanhood and independence. She takes us with her on her summer 2021 trip to Paris - reconnecting with friends, spending time exploring alone, biking through the city, etc. It felt at times like sex and the city (which is often referenced) with a slightly older group of women (not old, mid 40s). I reread several passages that really resonated with me. There were also a lot of historical and artistic references about women that I found really interesting. Definitely recommend grabbing a copy on the pub date 6/11/24.
September 18, 2024
I can see where the negative reviews come, but I am ignoring it them and all criticism of this. I think this book has a beautiful message, for all humans but especially women. Women do not owe themselves to the world. They do not owe the world children. To enjoy ourselves is enough. I love the messages in this book. Women can be any age and still find the same enjoyment in life, our age does not determine our right to pleasure. I found myself thinking of the meaning of life, it really is beautiful to just be here and enjoy ourselves. I don’t think this book would be a five star, but any book that gets me thinking about the meaning of my own life in a positive light has got to be a five star.
June 23, 2024
Honestly, if you're like me and not going on a holiday this year, but you want to romanticise a place and feel like you ARE on holiday, this book is the perfect thing to read. Also it's the only thing I've read in like, two weeks, so thanks for that Glynnis.
June 17, 2024
The author describes a month spent in Paris after the pandemic, and manages to get a book deal for her mundane musings. Shrugs …
July 22, 2024
i too would like to go on a month-long trip to paris and do whatever i wanted. but unlike this author, i would not go during a global pandemic and marvel about how empty the city was for chapters on end.
i also would not criticize younger women for their ambitions and dreams just because the path was harder for me.
i liked some parts of this memoir, especially the setting. however, i found the author condescending and honestly a little pretentious. i also didn’t care much about her sexual escapades with men lol.
this was definitely not for me and it felt really long. however i hope to have a trip like this at some point and applaud the author for realizing what she wants out of her life.
i also would not criticize younger women for their ambitions and dreams just because the path was harder for me.
i liked some parts of this memoir, especially the setting. however, i found the author condescending and honestly a little pretentious. i also didn’t care much about her sexual escapades with men lol.
this was definitely not for me and it felt really long. however i hope to have a trip like this at some point and applaud the author for realizing what she wants out of her life.
November 23, 2024
Yeah, most of the things that happened in this book weren't memoir worthy. Just get a journal.
Read
June 22, 2024Tough one for me to rate.
On the one hand: Good for MacNicol for her pursuit of pleasure, and I enjoyed the descriptions of Paris as well as the discussions about women artists and writers. I listened to the audiobook and enjoyed MacNicol’s narration.
That said, I had two major issues with this book: First, I feel like for most of the book there’s a complete lack of self-awareness of privilege. MacNicol even discusses how privileged a younger woman she meets is for her wealthy parents, without acknowledging that she, too, is privileged for being able to travel to Paris almost every summer for several years in a row. In the last couple of minutes of the book the author rattles off what finally feels like a list of ways in which she is, in fact, privileged to be doing this, but I would’ve liked to get some awareness of that earlier in the book (even if some of that is implicit in reading a memoir about traveling to Paris in pursuit of pleasure).
The bigger issue for me were the discussions of Covid/ the pandemic. I sympathize with the loneliness and isolation MacNicol felt in 2020 and her desire to rejoin her friends. But it sometimes seemed like she thought her inability to travel to Paris and have fun for a summer was the worst part of the pandemic. Comments like “life is for the living” and “stagnancy being a greater risk than illness” really rubbed me the wrong way. MacNicol’s also very flippant about the possibility of testing positive at the end of the book when returning to the U.S. (it’s the price to pay for having fun, etc.). At least MacNicol discussed needing to be vaccinated, the process of getting a vaccine card in France, etc., but as somebody who has lost family to Covid and who recently was very sick with Covid myself, I was honestly just kind of grossed out at how much the seriousness of the pandemic was minimized. Maybe that’s on me for reading a memoir in this vein post-2020.
On the one hand: Good for MacNicol for her pursuit of pleasure, and I enjoyed the descriptions of Paris as well as the discussions about women artists and writers. I listened to the audiobook and enjoyed MacNicol’s narration.
That said, I had two major issues with this book: First, I feel like for most of the book there’s a complete lack of self-awareness of privilege. MacNicol even discusses how privileged a younger woman she meets is for her wealthy parents, without acknowledging that she, too, is privileged for being able to travel to Paris almost every summer for several years in a row. In the last couple of minutes of the book the author rattles off what finally feels like a list of ways in which she is, in fact, privileged to be doing this, but I would’ve liked to get some awareness of that earlier in the book (even if some of that is implicit in reading a memoir about traveling to Paris in pursuit of pleasure).
The bigger issue for me were the discussions of Covid/ the pandemic. I sympathize with the loneliness and isolation MacNicol felt in 2020 and her desire to rejoin her friends. But it sometimes seemed like she thought her inability to travel to Paris and have fun for a summer was the worst part of the pandemic. Comments like “life is for the living” and “stagnancy being a greater risk than illness” really rubbed me the wrong way. MacNicol’s also very flippant about the possibility of testing positive at the end of the book when returning to the U.S. (it’s the price to pay for having fun, etc.). At least MacNicol discussed needing to be vaccinated, the process of getting a vaccine card in France, etc., but as somebody who has lost family to Covid and who recently was very sick with Covid myself, I was honestly just kind of grossed out at how much the seriousness of the pandemic was minimized. Maybe that’s on me for reading a memoir in this vein post-2020.
July 26, 2024
I so very much wanted to love this book, after reading a fantastic and inspiring interview with the author in Lyz Lenz’s Substack. The author is 46 during the events of the book- my age- and so many of the bigger themes are things that are on my mind. What does it mean for women, particularly “middle aged” women, to live freely, to celebrate friendship, to unabashedly seek pleasure. At its best, this memoir explores those questions thoughtfully— and I particularly enjoyed the chapter about women artists in Paris.
Unfortunately, much of the book fell short of its potential for me, and there were a number of moments when I wondered how a book about the pursuit of pleasure could feel like such a slog, and I had to force myself to finish it. It is billed as sexy and full of life, but there are large sections of tedious riding or walking around Paris, small talk standing in line, etc that add nothing to the story nor provide any meaningful insight or texture. I also found the fetishization of Paris to be quite cringey— it brought to mind the many many cookbook/memoirs by white women who “learned to really love food in Paris.” Also, the quite viciously mean chapter about the 27 year old writer felt out of place and a bit gross (and noting the author was happy to sleep w 27 year old men but viewed a 27 year old woman with barely disguised contempt).
Ultimately, this was a good idea, and in interview-sized pieces, it’s delightful. As a full book, it fell flat.
2.5 stars rounded down
Unfortunately, much of the book fell short of its potential for me, and there were a number of moments when I wondered how a book about the pursuit of pleasure could feel like such a slog, and I had to force myself to finish it. It is billed as sexy and full of life, but there are large sections of tedious riding or walking around Paris, small talk standing in line, etc that add nothing to the story nor provide any meaningful insight or texture. I also found the fetishization of Paris to be quite cringey— it brought to mind the many many cookbook/memoirs by white women who “learned to really love food in Paris.” Also, the quite viciously mean chapter about the 27 year old writer felt out of place and a bit gross (and noting the author was happy to sleep w 27 year old men but viewed a 27 year old woman with barely disguised contempt).
Ultimately, this was a good idea, and in interview-sized pieces, it’s delightful. As a full book, it fell flat.
2.5 stars rounded down
July 29, 2024
I had such high hopes for the book. And parts were enjoyable but honestly, she was the type of smug person who goes to Paris/ New York a few times and thinks she runs the city. We get it, you’re drinking with ‘locals’.
I found the lazy tropes around her saying, many times, ‘I’m sure there’s been feminist literature written about this’ - sexual liberation, the flaneur, being an independent woman- very annoying- because yes , yes there has been and it would have read better if she had referenced more. I loved the history of female artists and Parisian socialites - those bits she writes so well- but the sex and drinking and ‘wild parties’ if that’s what you want to call them- felt so forced and mechanical and not sexy one bit. It almost filled me with dread at ageing- why be so self aware and forced- just get on with it and have a fun time!? Plenty other books out there with similar stories and attitudes done much better. Obvs now I can’t remember any of them.
MIRANDA JULY- ALL FOURS is a recent one. Or most of Deborah Levy! It is always refreshing to read an alternative model of womanhood that isn’t solely based around marriage, kids, house etc. Things that perhaps we do want but don’t always want to do in the traditional ways. For that, I salute the authors brave and refreshing approach to life - but again- I feel almost too self aware for it to be a rebellious act. The best ‘rebels’ and rock and roll folk I know just do it and never look back. Isn’t there power in that?
I found the lazy tropes around her saying, many times, ‘I’m sure there’s been feminist literature written about this’ - sexual liberation, the flaneur, being an independent woman- very annoying- because yes , yes there has been and it would have read better if she had referenced more. I loved the history of female artists and Parisian socialites - those bits she writes so well- but the sex and drinking and ‘wild parties’ if that’s what you want to call them- felt so forced and mechanical and not sexy one bit. It almost filled me with dread at ageing- why be so self aware and forced- just get on with it and have a fun time!? Plenty other books out there with similar stories and attitudes done much better. Obvs now I can’t remember any of them.
MIRANDA JULY- ALL FOURS is a recent one. Or most of Deborah Levy! It is always refreshing to read an alternative model of womanhood that isn’t solely based around marriage, kids, house etc. Things that perhaps we do want but don’t always want to do in the traditional ways. For that, I salute the authors brave and refreshing approach to life - but again- I feel almost too self aware for it to be a rebellious act. The best ‘rebels’ and rock and roll folk I know just do it and never look back. Isn’t there power in that?
August 14, 2024
Pretty blah. I like the message, but it was all over the place. It was very hard to follow and didn't have a concrete message other than "do what you want."
June 27, 2024
I don't particularly enjoy reading about the pandemic ("In the first weeks of March 2020 there was much puzzling over why we didn’t have more stories about the 1918 flu pandemic. But now it seems clear: people want to move on as quickly as possible."), but I very much want to read about single childless women in their forties enjoying themselves. Generally, I love a good memoir, perhaps sprinkled with travel, but what it generally boils down to is reading about different ways of living a life.
Glynnis MacNicol takes you all the way from pandemic New York - empty, lifeless, lonely - to Paris. Opening up, coming back to life, while all Parisians are leaving their homes to go on vacation. And she talks you through what it means to be a woman in this world, one that does not adhere to societal expectations and one that has found a home away from home. One that has found family in her circle of friends that are all used to having their lives under control, down to the minuscule details. It's about pleasure, about enjoying yourself and living life the way you want to.
I loved this, from descriptions of Paris to the occasional art reference, but mostly the freedom and the flipping of the narrative.
"I have veered off the narrow path laid out for women to be successful in the world, and it turns out I’m fine. Sometimes better, sometimes worse, but mostly fine. Which inevitably throws a question mark at the end of her decisions. I mentioned this to Nina once, and she understood immediately: “We’re an attack on the value system of certain people.” As if my, or our, enjoyment undermines the hard work they have devoted to staying the path. And worse, calls into question the rewards that path offers. If I don’t feel bad about my life, how can they feel good? I used to feel the need to launch a rousing defense of myself in the face of this, but that’s gone away. It feels like enough that my life is no longer a question mark to me."
Glynnis MacNicol takes you all the way from pandemic New York - empty, lifeless, lonely - to Paris. Opening up, coming back to life, while all Parisians are leaving their homes to go on vacation. And she talks you through what it means to be a woman in this world, one that does not adhere to societal expectations and one that has found a home away from home. One that has found family in her circle of friends that are all used to having their lives under control, down to the minuscule details. It's about pleasure, about enjoying yourself and living life the way you want to.
I loved this, from descriptions of Paris to the occasional art reference, but mostly the freedom and the flipping of the narrative.
"I have veered off the narrow path laid out for women to be successful in the world, and it turns out I’m fine. Sometimes better, sometimes worse, but mostly fine. Which inevitably throws a question mark at the end of her decisions. I mentioned this to Nina once, and she understood immediately: “We’re an attack on the value system of certain people.” As if my, or our, enjoyment undermines the hard work they have devoted to staying the path. And worse, calls into question the rewards that path offers. If I don’t feel bad about my life, how can they feel good? I used to feel the need to launch a rousing defense of myself in the face of this, but that’s gone away. It feels like enough that my life is no longer a question mark to me."
June 24, 2024
This wasn’t for me. I wanted this to be a memoir of mid 40s female Main Character Energy. And it…kind of was? But also felt a little heavy handed on some of its agenda items which distracted me.
The writing also felt a bit like a college English essay, so I didn’t quite connect with it as a memoir. You could also make a drinking game every time you heard the word “skin.” (And the term “Skin Hunger?” GAG. Visceral No thank you.)
My last little gripe, and this is my own fault because I knew this going in: I am just not a person who romanticizes Paris AT ALL. So I almost always find books that do to be trite and irritating.
I’m sure there’s an audience for this, it just wasn’t for me. Also, it just wasn’t an instance where the author narrating was a great choice. I wouldn’t recommend on audio.
The writing also felt a bit like a college English essay, so I didn’t quite connect with it as a memoir. You could also make a drinking game every time you heard the word “skin.” (And the term “Skin Hunger?” GAG. Visceral No thank you.)
My last little gripe, and this is my own fault because I knew this going in: I am just not a person who romanticizes Paris AT ALL. So I almost always find books that do to be trite and irritating.
I’m sure there’s an audience for this, it just wasn’t for me. Also, it just wasn’t an instance where the author narrating was a great choice. I wouldn’t recommend on audio.
April 6, 2024
I wished I was drinking rose and eating a baguette while reading this lovely book about a woman having a lovely time pursuing pleasure (food, leisure, men) in Paris after the isolation of Covid. As a mom of three, I really loved escaping to France with Glynnis and seeing the world through the eyes of a woman who lives a very different life than I do. And how refreshing to read a (short!) memoir about someone who is actually…happy? It’s not what we’re accustomed to in personal narratives, which she aptly points out toward the end of the book, and I found it totally delightful.
August 3, 2024
I’ve eagerly awaited MacNicol’s next book since the publication of No One Tells You This, one of my all-time favorite memoirs. Our lives are different and we have different personalities but she’s an unofficial mentor of sorts as a single child-free woman who’s a few years older than me. I could not believe my luck when I saw this memoir was set in Paris and it released a week after I got back from my first trip to Paris. Kismet!
After the COVID vaccine became available and travel restrictions were eased, McNicol headed off to Paris in August 2021. She was 46 years old and eager to reconnect with her friends there after the isolation of lockdown in NYC. While there, her focus is on doing whatever brings her pleasure, whether that’s a good meal with friends, a spontaneous dance party on the Seine, or using the Fruitz hookup app.
This is strongest when it’s about her life and how she’s spending her time in France. The parts about movies/historical figures were less integrated and often jerked me out of the narrative. At the same time, I appreciated her reflections on the difficulty of structuring and writing a book focused on happiness and pleasure so I can see why she tried to bring in some other reference points. But for me, I simply enjoyed seeing Paris through her eyes and what this made her think about her life in NYC and what she wants to keep pursuing going forward. There’s no great romance here; the happy ending is MacNicol shaping her life exactly as she wants it. This is what I try to do myself, on a smaller scale, and it was gratifying and affirming to see that reflected here.
I want to briefly address COVID since so many of us have or had differing approaches. MacNicol is vaccinated before traveling and often wears a mask when she’s in public spaces. However, she also chose to travel to France during a time when we weren’t completely sure about the vaccine’s efficacy so that might be a non-starter for some. She doesn’t ask the men she has sex with about their vaccination status and there’s no self-isolation before or after. When she needs to take a mandated COVID test before she leaves the country, she’s not overly concerned and even thinks it could be likely she’ll test positive—she knows her friends will drop off food and medication as needed, which I found to be a lovely reflection of her expat community there. (She tests negative.) She did not lose any loved ones to COVID so her thoughts are more about the loneliness and isolation she experienced during lockdown (my situation too) and her relief over being able to be out in the world again. I saw a couple of reviews who felt she was cavalier about the pandemic. They’re entitled to their opinion but it didn’t strike me that way. Still, this is a personal issue so I want readers to go in with the information they need.
Content notes: COVID-19, past death of mother (dementia), cheaters on dating apps, divorced friends, ageism, anti-fat bias (somewhat countered), dismissal of sapiosexuals by friend, discussion of partner violence in a film, past death of friend’s fiancé, past mugging, 9/11, author is Canadian with a green card for the US, unsafe sex practices (no discussion of STI prevention or COVID vaccination status), fade to black sex, spanking, alcohol, hangover, ableist language, hyperbolic language around addiction, Harry Potter reference, mentions of incest in fiction and film, mention of past breast biopsy, mention of Hitler dying by suicide
After the COVID vaccine became available and travel restrictions were eased, McNicol headed off to Paris in August 2021. She was 46 years old and eager to reconnect with her friends there after the isolation of lockdown in NYC. While there, her focus is on doing whatever brings her pleasure, whether that’s a good meal with friends, a spontaneous dance party on the Seine, or using the Fruitz hookup app.
This is strongest when it’s about her life and how she’s spending her time in France. The parts about movies/historical figures were less integrated and often jerked me out of the narrative. At the same time, I appreciated her reflections on the difficulty of structuring and writing a book focused on happiness and pleasure so I can see why she tried to bring in some other reference points. But for me, I simply enjoyed seeing Paris through her eyes and what this made her think about her life in NYC and what she wants to keep pursuing going forward. There’s no great romance here; the happy ending is MacNicol shaping her life exactly as she wants it. This is what I try to do myself, on a smaller scale, and it was gratifying and affirming to see that reflected here.
I want to briefly address COVID since so many of us have or had differing approaches. MacNicol is vaccinated before traveling and often wears a mask when she’s in public spaces. However, she also chose to travel to France during a time when we weren’t completely sure about the vaccine’s efficacy so that might be a non-starter for some. She doesn’t ask the men she has sex with about their vaccination status and there’s no self-isolation before or after. When she needs to take a mandated COVID test before she leaves the country, she’s not overly concerned and even thinks it could be likely she’ll test positive—she knows her friends will drop off food and medication as needed, which I found to be a lovely reflection of her expat community there. (She tests negative.) She did not lose any loved ones to COVID so her thoughts are more about the loneliness and isolation she experienced during lockdown (my situation too) and her relief over being able to be out in the world again. I saw a couple of reviews who felt she was cavalier about the pandemic. They’re entitled to their opinion but it didn’t strike me that way. Still, this is a personal issue so I want readers to go in with the information they need.
Content notes: COVID-19, past death of mother (dementia), cheaters on dating apps, divorced friends, ageism, anti-fat bias (somewhat countered), dismissal of sapiosexuals by friend, discussion of partner violence in a film, past death of friend’s fiancé, past mugging, 9/11, author is Canadian with a green card for the US, unsafe sex practices (no discussion of STI prevention or COVID vaccination status), fade to black sex, spanking, alcohol, hangover, ableist language, hyperbolic language around addiction, Harry Potter reference, mentions of incest in fiction and film, mention of past breast biopsy, mention of Hitler dying by suicide
August 13, 2024
The book is about a forty-six-year-old unmarried author without children who spent 16 months in her Manhattan apartment during the pandemic. She then had the opportunity to sublet an apartment in Paris, which led her on a journey of self-discovery in the City of Lights. She made new friends, tried new food, experienced a different culture, and had different lovers. The themes of the book explore how a woman can find her personal power and come to terms with life as a middle-aged woman. The author intertwines history, humor, and the importance of connectivity and feminism at a time when everyone was feeling lost and disconnected.
I enjoyed how the author shared her humor, experiences with men, and the history of remarkable women. The book transported me to Paris and provided insights into how our culture has evolved after the pandemic. It also delves into questions women encounter, such as the place of single women in society and how to navigate our lives.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://zibbymedia.com/blogs/transcri...
I enjoyed how the author shared her humor, experiences with men, and the history of remarkable women. The book transported me to Paris and provided insights into how our culture has evolved after the pandemic. It also delves into questions women encounter, such as the place of single women in society and how to navigate our lives.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://zibbymedia.com/blogs/transcri...
Read
August 7, 2024i think this woman thinks she just fell out of a coconut tree. but she gave good recommendations at least for other books
Read
July 21, 2024DNF at 63% because I dont care about anything that happened so far.
June 29, 2024
my face hurts from smiling so much through this read! i think i could start over from the beginning right now and read it again with just as much joy
“When Paris ceases to be a silhouette or a mirage and instead becomes a place where people simply go about their days, making their lives; where the Métro herkily jerks along; where some portion of the city always seems to be on strike, and it's not uncommon to get a faint whiff of tear gas when Vélib'ing through Place de la République; where it's impossible to buy Advil in packs of more than ten for less than seven euros, buy nail polish for less than fifteen euros, get a package delivered, or even just find affordable quality sushi; it can be, if not shocking, then surprising, to encounter the Paris of the films. Of the fantasy.
But it does exist. And it's waiting for us now.”
“When Paris ceases to be a silhouette or a mirage and instead becomes a place where people simply go about their days, making their lives; where the Métro herkily jerks along; where some portion of the city always seems to be on strike, and it's not uncommon to get a faint whiff of tear gas when Vélib'ing through Place de la République; where it's impossible to buy Advil in packs of more than ten for less than seven euros, buy nail polish for less than fifteen euros, get a package delivered, or even just find affordable quality sushi; it can be, if not shocking, then surprising, to encounter the Paris of the films. Of the fantasy.
But it does exist. And it's waiting for us now.”
Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,152 reviews