Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit

by Allan Zullo & Gene Cheek

From the cover: "Lately, folks are feelin' as jumpy as a cockroach in a fryin' pan. But worryin' only gives small things big shadows. 'Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit' is a knee-slappin' collection of hundreds of enduaring, truthful, and amusing homespun adages and turns of phrases, and dozens of countrified jokes that will appeal to anyone who wants a change of pace in our pop culture-infused life."

Genres: Humor

198 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2009

Reviews

[Dustin the wind Crazy little brown owl · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is good for a laugh. ha ha. Amusing and smile inducing, this easy to read volume brought much happiness to me during the winter.

Some favorite sayings:

Don't let your mouth write checks that you r rear end can't cash.

You'll sit a long time with your mouth wide open before a roasted chicken flies in.

If you're outnumbered, best keep your mouth shut, or they'll tear your butt up like a tater field that's just been plowed.

I'm always so busy you'd think I was twins.

Time to paint your butt white and run with the antelope.

If dumb were dirt, you'd be 'bout an acre.

You're so narrow minded, you can see through a keyhole with both eyes.

If you had a third hand, you'd need another pocket to put it in.

He don't know whether to scratch his watch or wind his butt.

He's so ugly, his mama took him everywhere so she wouldn't have to kiss him good-bye.

Next thing you know, the hoot owls will be flirtin' with the chickens


This book also contains short little stories. Here is my favorite one:

DINNER TO DIE FOR
A married couple from up north decided to try a restaurant in a small Southern town and dined on fried chicken.
When they had finished, the woman told the waitress, "That was simply delicious. Please, miss, would you tell us how you prepare your chickens?"
After a short pause, the waitress replied, "Well, ma'am, around here we don't do anything real special. We just tell 'em straight out: 'You're gonna die.'"

[Mike Kowis · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this short, silly book filled with lots of old country sayings and a handful of hillbilly jokes. While most of the quotes made me smile, only a handful made me laugh out loud. A few of my favorites include "you're all hat and no cattle" (meaning you're a pretender), "there ain't no difference between a hornet and a yellow jacket when they're both buzzin' in your pants," and "just 'cause a chicken has wings don't mean it can fly." Why, this little book is almost as much fun as a hootenanny!

[Jessica Heck · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ok. Is this deep reading? No. Is this good for a laugh? Absolutely. My husband and I read through the whole book in an hour or so and were cracking up the entire time. We even adopted a few that we now use on the regular. My mom used to use phrases like this all the time even though she lived in the city. Why can’t we?!

[Rachel Carrington · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book brought back some memories! Along with country sayings, it includes short stories, all comedic, that harken back to the days when farmers were more prevalent than businessmen. When I was reading, I was thinking of old shows like The Waltons and Grandpa Walton's sayings. Overall, this book is a timeless reminder of the past. Amazingly, I still use many of these sayings today! (Busier than a one-legged man in a butt-kicking contest is one of my favorites!) It's a quick read at 197 pages, and if you're a fan of country ways, you'll love it!

[Alex · Rating 3 out of 5]

this was as cute as the other one, here are some of my favorites:
"don't hit a hornets' nest with a short stick."
"money thinks I'm dead."
"im living on the lucky side of the road."
"im so broke, i can't pay attention."
"any man trying to figure out a woman and so as confused as a cow in a parking lot."
"she's so persnickety she wouldn't be happy in a diamond mine."
"when she gets to heaven, she's gonna ask for better accommodations"
"get down off that cross, someone else needs the wood."
"the higher monkey climbs the more he shows his butt"
"his cheese slid off the cracker"

[Peter Catania · Rating 4 out of 5]

Gives ya enough scraps to make a quilt.

[Angela Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book made me laugh quite a few times.

[Jennifer · Rating 2 out of 5]

Just silly...

[Kassandra Lea · Rating 4 out of 5]

A delightfully silly read after too many hours spent working. If only I'd remember some of the zingers in here as a way to talk about my coworker!

[Betty · Rating 3 out of 5]

Amusing, fun and quick read. A couple of times I laughed out loud but mostly just smiled as I was reading.

[Lindsay · Rating 3 out of 5]

Made me smile!

[Patricia · Rating 4 out of 5]

A cute short read about the quaint language of our predecessors and hill country people. Most of these I had heard from various people in the past. A bit of nostalgia, if you will.

[Helena · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highly Recommend!
This book is a fiercely Southern compilation of sayings and one of the most entertaining books you will ever have the great fortune of reading(you're welcome).

[Linda Marini · Rating 4 out of 5]

funny little tidbits that make me miss living below the Mason/Dixon line!

[Winnie Thornton · Rating 3 out of 5]

Lots of cool Southern expressions. Impossible to read without an accent.

[Autumn Skye · Rating 3 out of 5]

Very cute. Reminded me of my great aunt.