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The Householder
"All the figures in this book...are irresistible comic manifestations."—The New Yorker
This witty and perceptive novel is about Prem, a young teacher in New Delhi who has just become a householder and is finding his responsibilities perplexing.226 pages, Kindle Edition
First published January 1, 1960
About the author
Ruth Prawer Jhabvala
60 books190 followersRuth Prawer Jhabvala was a British and American novelist and screenwriter. She is best known for her collaboration with Merchant Ivory Productions, made up of film director James Ivory and producer Ismail Merchant.
In 1951, she married Indian architect Cyrus Jhabvala and moved to New Delhi. She began then to elaborate her experiences in India and wrote novels and tales on Indian subjects. She wrote a dozen novels, 23 screenplays, and eight collections of short stories and was made a Commander of the Order of the British Empire (CBE) in the Diplomatic Service and Overseas List of the 1998 New Years Honours and granted a joint fellowship by BAFTA in 2002 with Ivory and Merchant. She is the only person to have won both a Booker Prize and an Oscar.
In 1951, she married Indian architect Cyrus Jhabvala and moved to New Delhi. She began then to elaborate her experiences in India and wrote novels and tales on Indian subjects. She wrote a dozen novels, 23 screenplays, and eight collections of short stories and was made a Commander of the Order of the British Empire (CBE) in the Diplomatic Service and Overseas List of the 1998 New Years Honours and granted a joint fellowship by BAFTA in 2002 with Ivory and Merchant. She is the only person to have won both a Booker Prize and an Oscar.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 60 reviews
October 26, 2018
You know, once in a lifetime, you come across a book that makes you keep a hand on your heart and send a prayer of gratitude to the heavens that you weren't the one who bought it. This, my friends, is that book- a book that makes you want to cut off the author's fingers one by one to acquaint them with the sense of torture his/her book has inflicted upon the reader and then shout 'Avada Kedavra' at them. It is a book that makes 'Twilight' look like the best literary creation of all times and that makes Chetan Bhagat look like a candidate of Nobel Prize for Literature.
YES! It is that BAD!
For those who call this book 'Irresistible', 'Comic' etc and call Ruth Prawer Jhabvala 'The Indian Dickens', I'd seriously like a word with them because even Dickens in his most descriptive mode wasn't as boring as this book was! Also, in no way was Prem, his wife and the stupid characters around him funny! If anything, they were THE MOST ANNOYING CHARACTERS in the history of English Literature.
There is Prem, the sickly, whiny protagonist, who is shy or embarrassed throughout the story. He is shy to talk to people, to ask his landlord for a cut in his rent, to ask his employer for a rise in his salary and shy to share a bag of nuts with his wife. HOWEVER, he is not shy to get the same wife pregnant and shag her every night!
There is Indu, the complete cow who plays his wife and behaves so abominably that even my maid looks like a Duchess in front of her.
And then there is a whole bunch of more annoying characters like Hans, Kitty, Raj, Prem's mother, the Seigals -and trust me, the less I say about them, the better!
If you're still not convinced and want to read this book here are a few scenarios in which this book might be read:
1. You have managed to lock yourself in a room where there are no shampoo bottles, medicine phials, bottles of hair oil, old newspapers, pamphlets- in short, anything that could be read except this book.
2. You're naive enough to believe the cover and think that this book is 'witty', 'reminiscent of Jane Austen', 'delightfully lively' etc and have already wasted money on it!
3. You're desperate to buy a book and this is the only one the bookseller is selling.
4. It is the LAST book left on the face of earth.
5. You want to experience exactly how shitty a book can become.
To those who have read it and by some miracle of God, liked it: Please do NOT send me a friend request or recommend it to any other person on Goodreads. We have better things to do!
To those who think I'm probably off my rocker and still want to read it: May you survive this book and live to read another one.
To those who think that this was old Ruth's best book: REALLY? Like, really? I dread to imagine what others are like! Come on, the grammar was AWFUL, the formation of questions were wrong and as for the colloquial part, WHO SPEAKS LIKE THAT?
A Sincere Advice: If you see it, don't buy it! If you've bought it, DON'T READ IT! And no matter what you do, DO NOT BOOK CROSS IT or someone will definitely write you an ode full of the choicest swear-words on your journal there.
YES! It is that BAD!
For those who call this book 'Irresistible', 'Comic' etc and call Ruth Prawer Jhabvala 'The Indian Dickens', I'd seriously like a word with them because even Dickens in his most descriptive mode wasn't as boring as this book was! Also, in no way was Prem, his wife and the stupid characters around him funny! If anything, they were THE MOST ANNOYING CHARACTERS in the history of English Literature.
There is Prem, the sickly, whiny protagonist, who is shy or embarrassed throughout the story. He is shy to talk to people, to ask his landlord for a cut in his rent, to ask his employer for a rise in his salary and shy to share a bag of nuts with his wife. HOWEVER, he is not shy to get the same wife pregnant and shag her every night!
There is Indu, the complete cow who plays his wife and behaves so abominably that even my maid looks like a Duchess in front of her.
And then there is a whole bunch of more annoying characters like Hans, Kitty, Raj, Prem's mother, the Seigals -and trust me, the less I say about them, the better!
If you're still not convinced and want to read this book here are a few scenarios in which this book might be read:
1. You have managed to lock yourself in a room where there are no shampoo bottles, medicine phials, bottles of hair oil, old newspapers, pamphlets- in short, anything that could be read except this book.
2. You're naive enough to believe the cover and think that this book is 'witty', 'reminiscent of Jane Austen', 'delightfully lively' etc and have already wasted money on it!
3. You're desperate to buy a book and this is the only one the bookseller is selling.
4. It is the LAST book left on the face of earth.
5. You want to experience exactly how shitty a book can become.
To those who have read it and by some miracle of God, liked it: Please do NOT send me a friend request or recommend it to any other person on Goodreads. We have better things to do!
To those who think I'm probably off my rocker and still want to read it: May you survive this book and live to read another one.
To those who think that this was old Ruth's best book: REALLY? Like, really? I dread to imagine what others are like! Come on, the grammar was AWFUL, the formation of questions were wrong and as for the colloquial part, WHO SPEAKS LIKE THAT?
A Sincere Advice: If you see it, don't buy it! If you've bought it, DON'T READ IT! And no matter what you do, DO NOT BOOK CROSS IT or someone will definitely write you an ode full of the choicest swear-words on your journal there.
May 28, 2013
According to the synopsis of this novel on Goodreads – this is a witty novel. There is certainly a kind of bittersweet comedic quality to some of it – but I’m not sure I’d call it witty exactly. I’m just being pedantic perhaps – for me, while The Householder is a comedy of manners – I found myself indulging in an occasional wry smile, rather than chuckling into my book. Nonetheless this is a charming touching novel which I found by turn, sad and heart-warming. Jhabvala beautifully depicts 1960’s Delhi society – particularly of the low waged educated classes. The dusty crowded streets and cramped living conditions, hoards of indolent young men, inattentive in large college classrooms – the difficulty of making ends meet, the strangeness of new responsibilities, Jhabvala captures it all perfectly.
Prem is a young teacher at a second (or even third) rate college – he knows he is not particularly good at his job and that his salary is barely sufficient to keep himself and his new wife – who is already pregnant. Life is not easy for Prem, he is shy and has no real friends in Delhi. His wife Indu is something of a mystery to him, theirs was an arranged marriage – and he is daunted by the responsibility of a wife and a home, and embarrassed by Indu’s pregnancy. When Prem’s mother announces she intends to visit her son, Indu reveals she is intending to go home to visit her mother. Prem doesn’t want her to go – but has no idea how to make her stay. Finding his salary too small, and his rent too high, Prem needs to pluck up the courage to speak to his employer and his landlord, tasks he finds himself quite unequal to. Invited to a college tea party Prem is desperate for he and Indu to create the right impression – the thought of a salary rise always at the back of his mind.
“He watched her drinking her tea and noticed regretfully that she was not doing so with the refinement which would be required at Mr Khanna’s tea-party. He brooded about this for a while, then got up and followed her into the bedroom. She was lovingly dusting a picture of Mother and Baby which she had recently acquired and hung up on the bedroom wall. Baby was very stout, with big fat folds in its legs, and Mother had a simpering expression and held a sunflower in one hand.
‘When you drink tea’ Prem said, ‘You must hold your little finger up in the air, like this.’ He demonstrated, and she watched him in amazement. Suddenly she gave a very strange sound and continued quickly with her dusting. ‘What is there to laugh at?’ he said crossly. “
Once a week Prem meets Raj – his one friend from his pre-Delhi life in Ankpur, Raj has been married longer than Prem, already has a child, works in a government office but lets Prem pay for their tea each time they meet. Poor Prem longs for the intimate confidential chat the two of them had enjoyed before their marriages – desperate to talk to someone about his difficulties at home and at work, but is unable to open up to Raj – who clearly has his own preoccupations. When Prem meets German tourist Hans he is embraced for his supposed Indian spirituality – and enjoys meeting the Swami that Hans has discovered.
When Indu does go to visit her mother, Prem is amazed at how he misses her, yet he seems unable to write and tell her so – embarrassed should any of her family read the letter – and having his mother around again is not quite as he had imagined either.
As Prem finds his way in his new way of life – he begins to feel differently about the bewildering array of responsibilities he has. Prem is one of life’s innocents – and for a time, in trying to please the people around him, he only serves to make himself less happy. We see Prem mature as he begins to understand his wife and the reality of his life and how to manage it. Jhabvala certainly manages to portray the lives of ordinary people in India faithfully, and in such a way that the reader instantly loves the characters.
This was the second of the Jhabvala books that Liz loaned me to read during my month of birthday reading. This charming novel then brings my birthday reading to a close. I know May has not quite finished – but I needed to get on with the next book in the Hardy reading challenge – my re-reading of Wessex Tales which I’m already enjoying very much.
April 23, 2013
Having made a trip to India at the end of 2012, I've found myself fascinated with the country and reading quite a few books about Indian life, some fiction and some non-fiction. Although this novel was written more than forty years ago, I suspect that the life of a young, newly married man (in an arranged marriage), holding down a job in a 2nd or perhaps 3rd or 4th rate college may not be so very different today. The adjustment to married life and all its responsibilities is quite a task even in a country where marriage for love, and often living together first, is the norm as it is here in our country and most western societies. The central character in Jhabvala's novel is young, the only wage earner in the family, with a pregnant wife. He isn't happy or even good at his job, but he has the responsibilities of a householder now...rent, food, the expenses of a child on the way, and the care of a wife not [yet] happy with her situation. He has only his parents' marriage as a model for his...the wife always obedient, the husband complete head of the household, the servant a requirement. He has no really close friend, someone in whom to confide, to ask for advice. His mother announces she is coming for an extended visit and his wife says she's going home until the baby is born...what to do?! I recommend this book.
June 12, 2012
It took decades for my mother to pull this book from her shelf, read it, love it, and pass it along to me. That this slim book waited so patiently is not surprising considering its protagonist. Set in New Dheli, THE HOUSEHOLDER by Ruth Prawer Jhabvala follows a few months in the life of Prem, a maddeningly passive newly-wed who wants so much to do right by people that he ends up pleasing no one including himself. It's told in a delightfully ironic third person that provides good comic distance. We are treated to a needy mother and the vacuous ravings of a German tourist who befriends Prem for his supposed spiritual purity as an Indian. We suffer along with Prem trying to “make it” in a tough world while genuinely hoping that his arranged marriage will work. As soon as I reached the end, I began to read it again. For those who can handle the bunglings of a sweetly ordinary man, it’s a wonderfully satisfying read.
July 22, 2023
A frustrating but thankfully short novel that can't decide what it wants to be. Our main character is one-dimensional, oppressed by everything and influenced by everyone, constantly having his feelings shunted between society's expectations of him and his own threadbare beliefs and desires. Like him, the novel needed redemption but finds none.
May 21, 2014
Ruth Prawer Jhabvala is definitely Indian- she's satirically, humorously, honourably Indian. Her book, " The Householder", documents Indian lowlife in the most detailed way possible, providing startling depth of insight with her sometimes excruciating descriptions.
One is not sure whether to call this a book far ahead of its times or to rue the fact that it could possibly be a book written appropriately for its own time- India just hasn't changed any on a socio-cultural level in the last fifty years.
Newly-married Prem is coming to terms with his dreary life as a householder. Stuck in a job as a rookie teacher in a private college, Prem is constantly at the beck and call of the management at work, chided by his seniors and disrespected by his students. His new wife, the plump and placid Indu, is a complete stranger to him, but he is greatly driven by his animal attraction to her. Even while he is trying to come to terms with the honeymoon phase of his sad life, his landlord refuses to lower his skyrocketing rent, his mother makes life miserable on her visits to his house and finally Indu, too, leaves him. Amidst all this, Prem seeks spiritual peace in the hermitage of a swami in his bid to gain some perspective and peace of mind.
Ruth Prawer Jhabvala writes with immense insight into the lives of people and the way they think. A book that enriches its reader, "The Householder", brings several things to perspective that were till then only lurking on the periphery of one's imagination.
One is not sure whether to call this a book far ahead of its times or to rue the fact that it could possibly be a book written appropriately for its own time- India just hasn't changed any on a socio-cultural level in the last fifty years.
Newly-married Prem is coming to terms with his dreary life as a householder. Stuck in a job as a rookie teacher in a private college, Prem is constantly at the beck and call of the management at work, chided by his seniors and disrespected by his students. His new wife, the plump and placid Indu, is a complete stranger to him, but he is greatly driven by his animal attraction to her. Even while he is trying to come to terms with the honeymoon phase of his sad life, his landlord refuses to lower his skyrocketing rent, his mother makes life miserable on her visits to his house and finally Indu, too, leaves him. Amidst all this, Prem seeks spiritual peace in the hermitage of a swami in his bid to gain some perspective and peace of mind.
Ruth Prawer Jhabvala writes with immense insight into the lives of people and the way they think. A book that enriches its reader, "The Householder", brings several things to perspective that were till then only lurking on the periphery of one's imagination.
August 23, 2012
رواية لا بأس بها ، لا أنصح بها إلا إن وجدتموها في مكان يتحتم فيه الانتظار و ليس معكم رفقة طيبة أو حتى سيئة .
الرواية تتحدث عن محاضر هندي وجد نفسه في مواجهة شرسة مع الحياة و كأنما لو تقدم السنّ به دفعة واحدة من المراهقة للشباب . برِم - و هذا اسم البطل و الذي لا يمكن اعتباره بطلاً بأي حال - لا يستطيع أن يدير حياته بالشكل الذي يريده فتلاميذه لا يبادلونه الاحترام و زوجته كذلك و حتى خادمه أيضاً . و بالحب تقريباً ينصلح حال البطل - و بدون أي حدث يذكر - ربما كانت صلوات الأم و دعواتها السبب ! الكاتبة ألمانية متزوجة برجل هندي و لهذا تواجد سائح أحمق مغرم بالهند و روحانيات الهند - و قد أُقحِمت الشخصية بشكل فج - و للأمانة لا تخلو الرواية من الشذرات الجيدة هنا و هناك و هذا بالتحديد ما حال بيني و بين الاستعانة بها لإشعال الأرقيلة : D
May 24, 2015
I just wish this book had been longer! The characters (Prem, his mother, Mrs Khanna, Hans, the landlord's family) really came to life for me. The story is sometimes funny, often touching. It's interesting to compare the non-Indians searching for inner meaning, while the Indian characters are mainly battling with everyday problems and difficulties. I really liked "Heat and Dust" and will now look for more books by Ruth Prawer Jhabvala.
July 5, 2011
Ruth Jhabvala is a wonderful writer that to me has mastered the art of dialogue and emotion in a book. I loved every minute of her story and believe that I will be reading more from her soon. So glad I picked this book up!
September 24, 2008
Slow, but well done.
March 6, 2013
Wonderful comic scenes.
April 4, 2013
Ruth Prawer Jhabvala and Prem, a perfect match.
June 7, 2013
Insightful, thoughtful, droll...wonderful.
One of a series of Ruth Prawer Jhabvala novels I've read in the past two years. Each one has been a gem.
One of a series of Ruth Prawer Jhabvala novels I've read in the past two years. Each one has been a gem.
January 8, 2015
Very funny. Prem (the hero) is so painfully awkward. I can relate.
March 31, 2011
Re-reading a an old favorite. Simply exquisite.
May 14, 2021
Enjoyed this short little book that paints a clear picture of 1960s Dehli but also has a universal theme of what we now call imposter syndrome. Prem doesn't know how to adult, can't figure out his approach to day-to-day problems, lives in constant anxiety of how other people perceive him, and is haunted by the question of how a person should be. Ruth Jhabvala is a remarkable storyteller who creates realistic characters and I will read anything by her.
September 10, 2020
Good, breezy read. How human emotions don't change a lot over decades. This book is 6 decades old and even then the concerns of a householder then and today are almost the same.
And this is the first book I have read by Ruth Prawer Jhabvala, her understanding of the Indian way of life is very nuanced.
And this is the first book I have read by Ruth Prawer Jhabvala, her understanding of the Indian way of life is very nuanced.
January 3, 2019
The Sunday Times calls Ruth Prawer Jhabvala 'a writer of genius... a writer of world class - a master story teller.' Seeing that she has been on my radar for years, and I have read such praise as the above on many an occasion, it seems odd that it has taken me such a long time to get around to actually reading her work. Whilst I didn't love The Householder, I'm so pleased I finally have an idea of her themes and writing style.
First published in 1960, The Householder is an 'appealing story of a young schoolteacher trying to come to terms with marriage and maturity', which is 'much more than a highly comic vignette of a particular society - it is also a reflection of a universal experience.' Prem is our protagonist, a young man who is 'not too good at enforcing discipline' in his role as Hindi teacher in a boy's college. He has recently married a woman named Indu, in a relationship arranged by his parents; he barely knows her, and feels adrift in their new home in Delhi. Indu is also pregnant, something which is 'a terrible embarrassment for him. Now everybody would know what he did with her at night in the dark...'.
Prem is almost constantly at odds with himself; his life is not shaping up to be following the same course which he had imagined so vividly, and try as he might, he is unable to change it. He cannot connect with his wife, no matter how hard he tries: 'He felt so alone and lonely, shut up in this small ugly flat with Indu who cried by herself in the sitting-room while he had to lie and cry by himself in the bedroom.' Prem is, essentially, at a point of crisis in his life. Whilst I did not find him a believable protagonist, he is both believable and understandable in his thoughts and actions.
The way in which Jhabvala writes about Indian society is fascinating, particularly with regard to Prem; despite having little disposable income, he feels that he has to keep a servant-boy to maintain his public appearance. Jhabvala deftly sets scenes, and gives one a feel for each of her characters in just a couple of sentences. Her prose has a wonderful ease to it. As a character study, The Householder is fascinating, but I did find that due to its rendering into the form of a novella, some important themes remained relatively unexplored. From the outset, I thought that this would be a four-star read, but the ending does feel a little too rushed to fit with the quiet patience which the rest of the story has. The Householder is unarguably transporting, however, and I look forward to visiting India again with Jhabvala very soon.
First published in 1960, The Householder is an 'appealing story of a young schoolteacher trying to come to terms with marriage and maturity', which is 'much more than a highly comic vignette of a particular society - it is also a reflection of a universal experience.' Prem is our protagonist, a young man who is 'not too good at enforcing discipline' in his role as Hindi teacher in a boy's college. He has recently married a woman named Indu, in a relationship arranged by his parents; he barely knows her, and feels adrift in their new home in Delhi. Indu is also pregnant, something which is 'a terrible embarrassment for him. Now everybody would know what he did with her at night in the dark...'.
Prem is almost constantly at odds with himself; his life is not shaping up to be following the same course which he had imagined so vividly, and try as he might, he is unable to change it. He cannot connect with his wife, no matter how hard he tries: 'He felt so alone and lonely, shut up in this small ugly flat with Indu who cried by herself in the sitting-room while he had to lie and cry by himself in the bedroom.' Prem is, essentially, at a point of crisis in his life. Whilst I did not find him a believable protagonist, he is both believable and understandable in his thoughts and actions.
The way in which Jhabvala writes about Indian society is fascinating, particularly with regard to Prem; despite having little disposable income, he feels that he has to keep a servant-boy to maintain his public appearance. Jhabvala deftly sets scenes, and gives one a feel for each of her characters in just a couple of sentences. Her prose has a wonderful ease to it. As a character study, The Householder is fascinating, but I did find that due to its rendering into the form of a novella, some important themes remained relatively unexplored. From the outset, I thought that this would be a four-star read, but the ending does feel a little too rushed to fit with the quiet patience which the rest of the story has. The Householder is unarguably transporting, however, and I look forward to visiting India again with Jhabvala very soon.
November 23, 2018
يقول اورهان باموق في كتابه الروائي الساذج والحساس: "ان الاعمال العظيمة التي نشعر معها باستمرار بوجود المحور، ونتساءل باستمرار أين ممكن ان يكون بالضبط؟
نغير باستمرار افكارنا فيما يتعلق بالجواب، والسبب هو ثراء المشهد وتعقيد الشخصيات ...."
الثيمة الاساسية التي يدور حولها موضوع الرواية وكما هو واضح من عنوانها هو الأسرة، لكن بسبب الثراء الذي احسست به شخصياً جعلني اشعر انها رواية اجتماعية متعددة المحاور بإمتياز
روث براور جهابفالا ألمانية انتقلت للعيش في الهند بعد ان تزوجت مهندساً هندياً، لكني وانا اقرأ الرواية شعرت بأنها إبنة هذا المجتمع، وربيبة هذه الثقافة (الثقافة الشرقية) بامتياز!
بين هاجس التفكير بمسؤولية الأسرة واعالتها، والحنين إلى ايّام العزوبية والعيش في كنف أبيه وأمه، سيكون القارىء برحلة مع المعلم برِم الذي وجد نفسه فجأة وتبعاً للظروف الاجتماعية التي تتحكم في اغلبها العادات والتقاليد مجبر على الزواج وكما جاء على لسان صديقه سوهان لال "هنا في بلدنا الهند، عندما نكون لا نزال أطفالاً، ولا يزال احدنا لا يعرف ماذا يريد، يأخذوننا ويقيدوننا بزوجة واطفال" ليكون بذلك امام مسؤولية رعاية عائلة (زوجة واطفال) اضافة لتحمل بقية اعباء الحياة وتقديم المزيد من التضحيات، بعد ان كان يعيش تحت رعاية أمه دون التفكير بشيء سوى النجاح في دراسته!!
بين هموم المسؤولية بعد الزواج، والتفكير بأيام العزوبية سنكون برحلة نتعرف فيها على اخلاقيات مجتمع شرقي، ريعي، لا يمكن ضمان مستقبلك فيه دون وظيفة حكومية تضمن لك دخل مادي مستمر اثناء وبعد التقاعد من الوظيفة
كما قلت الرواية تسلط الضوء على عدة مواضيع وتطرح أسئلة مهمة بإمكان القارىء اكتشافها، لكن اهم ما خرجت به، هل يجب علينا ان نتشارك ونهتم بالصعوبات التي يواجهها احدنا، ام علينا ان نواجه مصاعبنا وحدنا؟
هذا على الأقل ما شعر به برِم عندما طلب من السيد سيغال صاحب البيت الذي يؤجر فيه برِم، ان يخفض الإيجار، لان مدخوله المادي قليل نظراً لكثرة مسؤوليته ومن ضمنها انتظاره مولده الاول، وكذلك طلبه من مدير مدرسته السيد خانا زيادة راتبه حيث يقول برِم: "كل شخص منا يحتاج في مرحلة ما من الحياة إلى زيادة في الراتب" وخاصة بعد تغير الأحوال كما في حالة الأستاذ برِم الذي اصبح مدخوله المادي بعد الزواج لا يكفي
انها رواية الاوهام والخوف من المجهول القادم
رواية حب وصداقة وروحانيات
رواية اجيال وأزمنة ومفارقات
نغير باستمرار افكارنا فيما يتعلق بالجواب، والسبب هو ثراء المشهد وتعقيد الشخصيات ...."
الثيمة الاساسية التي يدور حولها موضوع الرواية وكما هو واضح من عنوانها هو الأسرة، لكن بسبب الثراء الذي احسست به شخصياً جعلني اشعر انها رواية اجتماعية متعددة المحاور بإمتياز
روث براور جهابفالا ألمانية انتقلت للعيش في الهند بعد ان تزوجت مهندساً هندياً، لكني وانا اقرأ الرواية شعرت بأنها إبنة هذا المجتمع، وربيبة هذه الثقافة (الثقافة الشرقية) بامتياز!
بين هاجس التفكير بمسؤولية الأسرة واعالتها، والحنين إلى ايّام العزوبية والعيش في كنف أبيه وأمه، سيكون القارىء برحلة مع المعلم برِم الذي وجد نفسه فجأة وتبعاً للظروف الاجتماعية التي تتحكم في اغلبها العادات والتقاليد مجبر على الزواج وكما جاء على لسان صديقه سوهان لال "هنا في بلدنا الهند، عندما نكون لا نزال أطفالاً، ولا يزال احدنا لا يعرف ماذا يريد، يأخذوننا ويقيدوننا بزوجة واطفال" ليكون بذلك امام مسؤولية رعاية عائلة (زوجة واطفال) اضافة لتحمل بقية اعباء الحياة وتقديم المزيد من التضحيات، بعد ان كان يعيش تحت رعاية أمه دون التفكير بشيء سوى النجاح في دراسته!!
بين هموم المسؤولية بعد الزواج، والتفكير بأيام العزوبية سنكون برحلة نتعرف فيها على اخلاقيات مجتمع شرقي، ريعي، لا يمكن ضمان مستقبلك فيه دون وظيفة حكومية تضمن لك دخل مادي مستمر اثناء وبعد التقاعد من الوظيفة
كما قلت الرواية تسلط الضوء على عدة مواضيع وتطرح أسئلة مهمة بإمكان القارىء اكتشافها، لكن اهم ما خرجت به، هل يجب علينا ان نتشارك ونهتم بالصعوبات التي يواجهها احدنا، ام علينا ان نواجه مصاعبنا وحدنا؟
هذا على الأقل ما شعر به برِم عندما طلب من السيد سيغال صاحب البيت الذي يؤجر فيه برِم، ان يخفض الإيجار، لان مدخوله المادي قليل نظراً لكثرة مسؤوليته ومن ضمنها انتظاره مولده الاول، وكذلك طلبه من مدير مدرسته السيد خانا زيادة راتبه حيث يقول برِم: "كل شخص منا يحتاج في مرحلة ما من الحياة إلى زيادة في الراتب" وخاصة بعد تغير الأحوال كما في حالة الأستاذ برِم الذي اصبح مدخوله المادي بعد الزواج لا يكفي
انها رواية الاوهام والخوف من المجهول القادم
رواية حب وصداقة وروحانيات
رواية اجيال وأزمنة ومفارقات
June 27, 2013
This is not my sort of humour, which is why I did not enjoy it more, but it is well done as a mildly satirical look at the transition from boy to man. Very little happens, but that is really the point; to go from being a student in one's mothers house to being a 'householder' -- the head of a household, responsible for a wife (who was chosen by the parents; this is the world of arranged marriages) and potential child, earning one's income -- is not a dramatic process, nor necessarily even a perceptible one, but instead a matter of accepting the new situation by small degrees. Prem eventually comes to a place in which I think this is why so many people find the novel dull; they want an arc of motion, a powerful change, but this novel is deeply realistic in the way that this kind of 'growing up' happens. Indeed, in a modern 21st century sense, Prem is not growing up at all; he's just fitting the space that society provides for him, stepping into the role and becoming comfortable in it.
So: I found the book interesting as a very realistic study of this sort of change in life, and particularly interesting as giving silent insight into Indian culture. But I did not really enjoy it.
So: I found the book interesting as a very realistic study of this sort of change in life, and particularly interesting as giving silent insight into Indian culture. But I did not really enjoy it.
December 12, 2018
A thoughtful yet poignant piece on the day to day struggles of a middle-class family man in 50s India.
Set in Delhi, the Householder is a story of Prem, coming to terms with the responsibilities of his new marriage and impending birth of his child. Unable to deal with his new life, he turns to spirituality and looks for the meaning of life from a Swami (saint), his friends and colleagues. His incompetence as a teacher and a disciplinarian troubles his conscience. At the home front, he truly expects subservience from his wife, but to not effect. To make matters worse, he is unsure of her feelings towards him.
The novel traces Prem's growth from boyhood to maturity, from innocence to experience. He is conflicted by the disenchantment and pleasures of materialistic society.
Ruth Prawer Jhabvala works in India, dwell on the themes of romantic love and arranged marriages and are portraits of the social mores, idealism and chaos of the early decades of independent India.
She brilliantly captures the POV of a man who has recently married and is in the family way. This book simply deserves a standing ovation. Its been adapted to a film starring Shashi Kapoor.
Set in Delhi, the Householder is a story of Prem, coming to terms with the responsibilities of his new marriage and impending birth of his child. Unable to deal with his new life, he turns to spirituality and looks for the meaning of life from a Swami (saint), his friends and colleagues. His incompetence as a teacher and a disciplinarian troubles his conscience. At the home front, he truly expects subservience from his wife, but to not effect. To make matters worse, he is unsure of her feelings towards him.
The novel traces Prem's growth from boyhood to maturity, from innocence to experience. He is conflicted by the disenchantment and pleasures of materialistic society.
Ruth Prawer Jhabvala works in India, dwell on the themes of romantic love and arranged marriages and are portraits of the social mores, idealism and chaos of the early decades of independent India.
She brilliantly captures the POV of a man who has recently married and is in the family way. This book simply deserves a standing ovation. Its been adapted to a film starring Shashi Kapoor.
April 5, 2016
The householder in the title is a young Indian man, only recently married. He was raised in an older culture mindset that leaves him ill prepared for modern adult life.
His chief problem in life is himself. He has no confidence, no courage. Second guesses himself constantly then feels frustrated that people aren't giving him proper due and/or taking advantage of him.
Normally I would despise this kind of character but for me, this book ends up being a tragedicomedy, as you see him work things through, or fail to.
The people he rejects the most are the ones I like the best. The ones he looks for the favor of, are people of poor character yet superficially higher social status in most cases.
I didn't care for him but I liked the glimpses of the good characters and kept hoping he'd finally get his head out of his behind and see who was really worthy of his attention.
I'd recommend a bunch of other books over this one for anyone wanting to read a book in Indian culture but this isn't a bad one especially if you've already read all of Thrity Umigar's, etc etc.
A good read if it's right in front of you.
December 6, 2016
Story of a struggling professor from a small town, working in a private college in Delhi in the 1960s, who is also newly married and coming to terms with all the changes in his personal life. Good description of a simple life and what it took to be a householder back then in India, for a middle class couple. Enjoyed reading the short and interesting novel.
January 19, 2009
fine detail and nuances.
but incredibly slow.
but incredibly slow.
April 10, 2011
Nice, affecting portrait of a young man newly married trying to find his way.
November 14, 2013
Had to read for in-class assignment but i found it somewhat humorous.
December 14, 2025
A tale of the nascent lower middle class in India, circa the 1960s, when the country was emerging from its colonial yoke. There are no great epiphanies or reversals, and the book serves as a snapshot of the society, full of stereotypical characters.
Prem is the recently married teacher whose wife, Indu, is pregnant. The couple have been married through arrangement, and are strangers to each other. Whenever intimacy beckons, Prem hides behind his stern role of “master of the house,” much to Indu’s chagrin. Prem has two obstacles to overcome as the weak hero of this tale: get a raise in salary from the proprietor, Mr. Khanna, of the private school he teaches at, and/or get a reduction in rent from his landlord, Mr. Seigal. Despite his many assaults on these two bastions, Prem always comes up short.
Prem has no friends other than Raj from his childhood, who is now a government servant, much married and burdened financially, and who sponges off him whenever they meet. Prem meets Hans, a German who sees only the spiritual qualities of India, whereas Prem is embroiled in more practical monetary matters. I wondered about Hans’s real designs on Prem, which were never articulated fully but were left to conjecture.
Indu is a passive-aggressive wife who is frustrated at having to give up her education and career to become a housewife to a man she doesn’t respect. She also is faced with a dilemma: Prem’s mother is coming to visit and Prem insists that Indu stay and cater to the old lady’s needs, while Indu’s mother has written and invited her daughter to come “home” and to go through her confinement in the company of known family.
Ruth Prava Jhabwala, was a Polish woman, educated in England and domiciled in India after marrying a Parsi. She was much criticized for her Indian novels as she described Indians from the outside, never actually being one. She hits on some key issues facing middle class Indians at the time: the discomfort and loneliness of partners in arranged marriage relationships; the peculiar intimacy between young men deprived of ready access to females due to social restrictions; the exploitation of the clerical class by the entrepreneur class; the dreariness of government service; and the overbearing nature of parents. But she doesn’t quite get under the skin of her characters, and they stand out as stereotypes.
Jhabvala also employs the technique of having people talk over each other, either to show that no one is listening, or to show that they are expressly choosing not to listen for fear of hearing unpleasant truths: Mrs. Khanna is asking about train schedules while her husband is disciplining Prem; young Romesh Seigal is talking about how he loves going to the movies while his mother is lamenting her daughter’s failed marriage; Prem’s mother is scolding the servant boy while Prem is freaking out about Indu leaving him.
Marriage is a societal demand of men and women, and is the yardstick of success, yet those aspiring to that institution are unhappy and lead lives of quiet desperation. Sex is a taboo subject, only to be enjoyed in the dark. Mothers-in-law are tormentors of daughters-in-law and consider themselves irreplaceable for their sons. Sons are trapped in the roles conferred to them by birth.
Prem is a weak protagonist and does not overcome his twin obstacles set out earlier in this review. However, we might argue that in the course of the book, he gets closer to Indu. The ending was rather flat and disappointing, and I figured Jhabvala needed a course in novel writing. How this novel not only sold well, but that a movie was made out of it, makes me shake my head.
Prem is the recently married teacher whose wife, Indu, is pregnant. The couple have been married through arrangement, and are strangers to each other. Whenever intimacy beckons, Prem hides behind his stern role of “master of the house,” much to Indu’s chagrin. Prem has two obstacles to overcome as the weak hero of this tale: get a raise in salary from the proprietor, Mr. Khanna, of the private school he teaches at, and/or get a reduction in rent from his landlord, Mr. Seigal. Despite his many assaults on these two bastions, Prem always comes up short.
Prem has no friends other than Raj from his childhood, who is now a government servant, much married and burdened financially, and who sponges off him whenever they meet. Prem meets Hans, a German who sees only the spiritual qualities of India, whereas Prem is embroiled in more practical monetary matters. I wondered about Hans’s real designs on Prem, which were never articulated fully but were left to conjecture.
Indu is a passive-aggressive wife who is frustrated at having to give up her education and career to become a housewife to a man she doesn’t respect. She also is faced with a dilemma: Prem’s mother is coming to visit and Prem insists that Indu stay and cater to the old lady’s needs, while Indu’s mother has written and invited her daughter to come “home” and to go through her confinement in the company of known family.
Ruth Prava Jhabwala, was a Polish woman, educated in England and domiciled in India after marrying a Parsi. She was much criticized for her Indian novels as she described Indians from the outside, never actually being one. She hits on some key issues facing middle class Indians at the time: the discomfort and loneliness of partners in arranged marriage relationships; the peculiar intimacy between young men deprived of ready access to females due to social restrictions; the exploitation of the clerical class by the entrepreneur class; the dreariness of government service; and the overbearing nature of parents. But she doesn’t quite get under the skin of her characters, and they stand out as stereotypes.
Jhabvala also employs the technique of having people talk over each other, either to show that no one is listening, or to show that they are expressly choosing not to listen for fear of hearing unpleasant truths: Mrs. Khanna is asking about train schedules while her husband is disciplining Prem; young Romesh Seigal is talking about how he loves going to the movies while his mother is lamenting her daughter’s failed marriage; Prem’s mother is scolding the servant boy while Prem is freaking out about Indu leaving him.
Marriage is a societal demand of men and women, and is the yardstick of success, yet those aspiring to that institution are unhappy and lead lives of quiet desperation. Sex is a taboo subject, only to be enjoyed in the dark. Mothers-in-law are tormentors of daughters-in-law and consider themselves irreplaceable for their sons. Sons are trapped in the roles conferred to them by birth.
Prem is a weak protagonist and does not overcome his twin obstacles set out earlier in this review. However, we might argue that in the course of the book, he gets closer to Indu. The ending was rather flat and disappointing, and I figured Jhabvala needed a course in novel writing. How this novel not only sold well, but that a movie was made out of it, makes me shake my head.
November 6, 2019
Another delightful and astute character study by the woefully undervalued Jhabvala. The central character is Prem, a mediocre teacher who finds everything about his new life in Delhi puzzling and burdensome: his new wife, whom he barely knows but who is already pregnant after 4 months of marriage; his bored students; his rich and superficially westernized landlords who charge him too much rent simply because he is a push-over; his old friend Raj who seems to have lost all interest in rehashing stories of their carefree days. A meek and sensitive guy who was mollycoddled as the only son in his family, Prem finds it impossible to assert himself, and having quickly written as off as a failure, his wife Indu goes back to her own family without so much as a farewell note. Meanwhile, Prem's widowed mother arrives in Delhi and promptly takes over her son's life without giving much in return except for good meals. Through an equally put-upon colleague of his, Sohan Lal, Prem meets a swami who triggers in him vague impulses towards the spiritual life. For his part, the bumbling German Hans Loewe, who has come to India to seek enlightenment, is convinced that just by virtue of being Indian, Prem is already endowed with spirituality. Loewe is a typical Jhabvala character, the benighted Westerner whose enthusiastic embrace of everything Indian is based on emotional deafness and a colossal misunderstanding. The party where Prem and his European "friends" talk at cross-purposes is one of the most hilarious in the whole book. The fact is, although he has discovered that being an adult is hard and not much to his taste, Prem has no intention on giving up on his duties as a householder. When Indu, presumably disappointed after a stint with mum and dad, comes back to him, readier than before to be a helpmeet to her husband, Prem takes heart again and good sex gives the couple another chance at flourishing together. In the last scene, Raj and his own family visit Prem and Indu at home, and although things are far from rosy for the 2 struggling couples, there is a glimmer of hope. This is vintage Jhabvala, tender and caustic at the same time.
May 10, 2024
I am giving this book a solid 2 stars out of five. I could not like the book the way I was hoping to like it. The story feels incomplete. The character development is not consistent as it goes back and forth. Though it’s marketed as a Bildungsroman I could not see a proper development taking place, or whatever the development was I couldn’t understand it.
Coming to the novel, ‘The Householder’ follows the story of a young, shy teacher, Prem Sagar, who is caught up in the complexities of adulthood. Set in the 1950s or 60s, life is catching up fast with him and he is struggling to meet his goals. He has a low-paying job as a school teacher, and a high rent to pay, and on top of that, his wife, Indu, is expecting a child. Initially, Prem finds this a burden but gradually starts to take pride in his responsibilities. This is, of course, a significant development but it’s not enough.
Since the beginning of the book, Prem’s two main goals were to ask for a salary increment and a reduction in rent. Though he has a lot of unsuccessful attempts at both, this conflict is not tactfully solved/handled in the end. It’s a domestic novel with characters having an old-school mindset. So probably that’s the reason I didn’t enjoy it. Moreover, the ending seems a little off.
According to me, the story should have taken place in a longer time-span, at least a few years. A longer novel of about 500 pages, with a good detailed plot and exploring the female characters would have worked for me. Basically, the author could have done so much to make it a well-rounded coming-of-age story but left it feeling incomplete.
Also, one quick mention- there is also a film adaptation of the book. I watched the film first so it heavily influenced my perception of the book and that’s why I picked it up. Though the movie mostly sticks to the original plot, I would give it 3 stars only because of the acting. Both Shashi Kapoor and Leela Naidu had an unmatched sweetness that was refreshing to watch.
So this is why one can easily be caught up in historical fallacy when judging the book (or the movie). And I tried my best to keep aside the ‘old-world charm’ in my review. Overall, though I wouldn’t recommend the book I would recommend the movie.
Coming to the novel, ‘The Householder’ follows the story of a young, shy teacher, Prem Sagar, who is caught up in the complexities of adulthood. Set in the 1950s or 60s, life is catching up fast with him and he is struggling to meet his goals. He has a low-paying job as a school teacher, and a high rent to pay, and on top of that, his wife, Indu, is expecting a child. Initially, Prem finds this a burden but gradually starts to take pride in his responsibilities. This is, of course, a significant development but it’s not enough.
Since the beginning of the book, Prem’s two main goals were to ask for a salary increment and a reduction in rent. Though he has a lot of unsuccessful attempts at both, this conflict is not tactfully solved/handled in the end. It’s a domestic novel with characters having an old-school mindset. So probably that’s the reason I didn’t enjoy it. Moreover, the ending seems a little off.
According to me, the story should have taken place in a longer time-span, at least a few years. A longer novel of about 500 pages, with a good detailed plot and exploring the female characters would have worked for me. Basically, the author could have done so much to make it a well-rounded coming-of-age story but left it feeling incomplete.
Also, one quick mention- there is also a film adaptation of the book. I watched the film first so it heavily influenced my perception of the book and that’s why I picked it up. Though the movie mostly sticks to the original plot, I would give it 3 stars only because of the acting. Both Shashi Kapoor and Leela Naidu had an unmatched sweetness that was refreshing to watch.
So this is why one can easily be caught up in historical fallacy when judging the book (or the movie). And I tried my best to keep aside the ‘old-world charm’ in my review. Overall, though I wouldn’t recommend the book I would recommend the movie.
March 16, 2018
On the front cover of my copy (The Norton Library, 1977) of The Householder, a writer from the New York Times Book Review (presumably writing in 1960, when the book was first published) calls this tender, quiet, and utterly insignificant novel "wickedly irreverent" among other things. And I have to think, after reading and even enjoying this book, that the bar for irreverence was much, much lower 60 years ago. Much lower. Like, subterranean.
And yes, I called a novel that I liked "insignificant." It's not meant to be an insult. It is without significance. It's an entertainment, of the mild-mannered British variety (like most of Anthony Burgess, like much of Kingsley Amis, John Wain, Muriel Spark and countless others from that period), the kind of novel that doesn't get published much any more. It isn't trying to change anything in the "real" world. It certainly isn't trying to change anyone's mind about anything. It has no innovation about it -- stylistic, linguistic, or cultural. It's a well written and completely engaging diversion.
Had I been alive and publishing book reviews in 1960, my dust jacket quote would have been, "It's a pleasant Sunday brunch of a book."
And yes, I called a novel that I liked "insignificant." It's not meant to be an insult. It is without significance. It's an entertainment, of the mild-mannered British variety (like most of Anthony Burgess, like much of Kingsley Amis, John Wain, Muriel Spark and countless others from that period), the kind of novel that doesn't get published much any more. It isn't trying to change anything in the "real" world. It certainly isn't trying to change anyone's mind about anything. It has no innovation about it -- stylistic, linguistic, or cultural. It's a well written and completely engaging diversion.
Had I been alive and publishing book reviews in 1960, my dust jacket quote would have been, "It's a pleasant Sunday brunch of a book."
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