The High-Schooler's Guide to the Galaxy

by Bryan Starchman

Four students stare out at the audience. Tomorrow they start their freshman year of high school. There are so many things to worry about: class schedules, bullies, cafeteria food, dating, parents’ expectations, what to wear, and worst of all … gym class! These students need a survival guide and that’s exactly what this play attempts to do with hilariously embarrassing and awkward results. Watch as our guides take us through the gauntlet that is high school. Find out the appropriate way to boogie down at high school dances, discover creative ways to get out of gym class, and take a peek into the most top secret of all rooms on campus: the mysterious teachers’ lounge. With minimal sets, incredibly flexible casting, and scenes we can all relate to, this galaxy is only “laugh-years” away.

15 to 40 actors

60 pages, Paperback

Published January 1, 2008

About the author

Bryan Starchman grew up in the small foothill town of Mariposa, CA., just outside of Yosemite National Park. He began writing short stories in the first grade and fell in love with screenwriting in high school. Soon he tried his hand at playwriting. At UCLA, he spent four years honing his craft. There, he won the UCLA playwriting award for his satire on fraternity life. Unfortunately Bryan and Los Angeles went together like Elizabeth Taylor and husbands -- it just wasn’t meant to be. Now he lives in Mariposa where every night he plays the ukulele with his dogs Maggie and Luna. He teaches English and Drama at his old high school. His plays have been produced over 2000 times in all 50 states and Puerto Rico, in 9 out of 10 Canadian Provinces (come on Prince Edward Island!) and around the world in Mexico, England, Italy, Dubai of the United Arab Emirates, South Africa, Nigeria, and Portugal. He has also collaborated with fellow Eldridge playwright and composer Stephen Murray to create "Just Another High School Musical" and "Parents Just Don't Understand: The Musical." In 2018 he was the recipient of the NBC RISE grant beating out nearly 1,000 other schools and his drama program was featured coast to coast on The Today Show.

Reviews

[Kat · Rating 3 out of 5]

Basic Plot: Advice for incoming freshmen in high school.

This is a series of short scenes that ostensibly gives advice to students beginning their freshman year in high school. It hits in some scenes and misses big in others. It relies fairly heavily on stereotypes of all sorts- cafeteria food, bus drivers, gender roles, etc. - so when it misses, it misses hard. The play was written in 2008, so obviously the pop culture references are already outdated, but that's manageable. I like the concept, but I don't think I would ever put this on stage, just because some of the stuff hits the mark so badly. The stuff that was funny, though, might make for some good classroom exercises.