How to Attract the Wombat

by Will Cuppy, Ed Nofziger (Illustrator)

A survey of the animal kingdom in which the nocturnal and tunneling wombat is awarded the greatest praise.

Will Cuppy was something like the Larry David of the mid-20th century. From his perch as a staff writer at The New Yorker , Cuppy observed the world and found a great deal that annoyed him. This collection of essays on animals includes “Birds Who Can’t Even Fly,” “Optional Insects,” “Octopuses and Those Things”, and “How to Swat a Fly,” which codifies the essentials in ten hilarious principles. And three essays on wombats. Perfect reading for the perplexed, befuddled, and perpetually irritated.

Genres: Humor, Animals, Essays, Nonfiction

176 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1935

About the author

William Jacob "Will" Cuppy was an American humorist and literary critic, known for his satirical books about nature and historical figures.

Reviews

[P.J. Sullivan · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was Cuppy's third book of complaints about animals. It is mostly about mammals, but also gets into amphibians, birds, insects, worms, Greek poets, and practically everything else. It is rich in empirical science, such as, "A decapitated salamander cannot make quick decisions," and philosophical insights, such as, "Intelligence is the capacity to know what we are doing and instinct is just instinct. The results are about the same." And even aesthetics: "The wart hog is often called the ugliest of all animals but the rhinoceros is uglier because he is larger and there is more of him to be ugly."

There is a section titled “Problem Mammals” but Cuppy seemed to have had problems with all the animals in this book, including “birds who can’t even fly” and “birds who can’t sing and know it.” And wombats, of course. “Are wombats people?” he asks, rhetorically. Because animals are, after all, only human. Three whole chapters are devoted to wombats but I can’t say they offer any useful advice on attracting them. No matter. After reading the three chapters you won’t even want to attract them!

Some people have accused Cuppy of making up things. I have never found any proof of this, but where did he get the factoid on page 116, that a snail can do the hundred yard dash in thirty hours flat? Can’t help wondering about that one!

Very funny. Cuppy-strength funny. One does not need to be a wombat fancier to enjoy this book, which is lavishly and delightfully illustrated by Ed Nofziger.

[Kirsti · Rating 4 out of 5]

Delightful (and scrupulously researched) essays about wildlife, written by a hermit who lived in New York City. Most were originally published in The Saturday Evening Post and The New Yorker.

"Baby Pelicans are simply awful. The female Pelican feeds them on predigested fish served in her pouch. When they become too greedy and noisy and generally unbearable, she closes her bill and hits them on the head with it, so that baby Pelicans are always staggering about in a dazed condition, squalling for more fish and getting whammed on the head again. As the force of such blows is hard to judge, little accidents occur from time to time. That's a risk you have to take. Moral: It's a great life, if you like fish."

I got a lot of weird looks while reading this on the El.

[Risa · Rating 4 out of 5]

Still the funniest book I've ever read.

[Rick Rapp · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an amusing book on the wombat and other types of insects and animals with clever observations and anecdotes. It's a perfect little distraction from the insanity of the world.

[Menubar Memorial · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short, little essays anthropomorphizing various animals with a deadpan humor that sneaks up behind you. It's like music to my eyes to read an author who can actually write. Cuppy's command of the English language is a treat and will leave you wondering why you're laughing so hard. I'd classify his style as early deadpan British humor if he wasn't a New Yorker. A great "bathroom book" or travel companion - anytime you could use a quick laugh.

[Janell · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is the perfect collection of essays to keep in the bathroom, and read one or two every time you drop in.(1) The author has extensively researched a wild variety of animals(2), and provides a fact-based commentary on a their habits, traits, and reproductive habits.(3) After reading this book, you may completely rethink what sort of animal might make the a perfect pet.(4) This, I suppose, is what passes for entertainment in certain circles. If you're in those circles, this book is for you.

(1) If you're a fan of humorous footnotes, you're in for a real treat!
(2) Not just the wombat. Also some insects, amphibians, and ... well, just go read the book.
(3) I'm not sure why he cares why scorpions get together even though they all look appalling.
(4) I bet you've never even considered getting a pet wombat.

[Michael · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found these humorous essays better than Cuppy's book about historical figures (The Decline and Fall of Practically Everybody)—but less enjoyable than How to Be a Hermit. Good for light reading, especially if you want something that can mostly be consumed in short bites.

If you're the type who reads P.G. Wodehouse, I'd give this author a try.

[Erin · Rating 3 out of 5]

These humorous short overviews of a range of surprising animals are dated but still funny.

[Tanya Wing · Rating 1 out of 5]

not funny at all

[AJ · Rating 5 out of 5]

1930s-style giggly humor.

[Renee · Rating 3 out of 5]

Vintage The New Yorker humor. A bit too silly and toothless for me, but could be great for the right reader.

[Fishface · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not my very favorite Cuppy; this one comes across as the odds and ends of his animal research. But dang! Any Cuppy is better than a sharp stick in the eye!

[Alex · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wombat wombat wombat wombat wombat.