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All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles
Khephren
There’s no way in Helgar's Nebula I’m marrying the candidate my parents have chosen for me. I don’t want to be the house-husband of some stoic warrior who only cares about training all day. Boring! Thankfully, I’ve learned a thing or two from all those rom-com human movies I’ve illegally downloaded off the intergalactic web. No one will see it coming when I pull a runaway groom maneuver on them!
Once I make my escape, I can go on the solo honeymoon of my dreams—to planet Earth. It’s almost that wondrous time of year when they celebrate their holiday known as “Christmas.” Human Hallmark movies make it seem so magical. I want to experience it for myself! Now, I just need to find a human who can make my wish come true and help me have an authentic holly jolly time…
Sasha
Scrooge was right when he said “bah humbug” to Christmas. This time of year sucks balls, and not the fun kind. I’ve just lost my crappy part-time job and I’m slowly sinking under a sea of student loan debt and crushed dreams.
Just when I think my life couldn’t possibly get any worse, my cat and I are abducted by an alien who wants me to help him experience a "real human Christmas" on his ship. WTF? Clearly he’s chosen the worst possible candidate for the job.
But there’s something about Khephren’s enthusiasm and eternal optimism that starts to melt even my grumpy, cynical heart. Heck, I even agree to be his fake fiancé to get his parents off his back! I don’t know what’s happening to me, but Khephren’s charm is making me feel things I never have before. And those bright pink tentacles of his are strangely fascinating. I can’t help but wonder what all they can do…
As we spend more time together, I start to realize I might not want to go home and that maybe, just maybe, I’ve found what I’ve always secretly been yearning for. Could Khephren feel the same? If so, it would be a Christmas miracle and I don’t believe in those…right?
There’s no way in Helgar's Nebula I’m marrying the candidate my parents have chosen for me. I don’t want to be the house-husband of some stoic warrior who only cares about training all day. Boring! Thankfully, I’ve learned a thing or two from all those rom-com human movies I’ve illegally downloaded off the intergalactic web. No one will see it coming when I pull a runaway groom maneuver on them!
Once I make my escape, I can go on the solo honeymoon of my dreams—to planet Earth. It’s almost that wondrous time of year when they celebrate their holiday known as “Christmas.” Human Hallmark movies make it seem so magical. I want to experience it for myself! Now, I just need to find a human who can make my wish come true and help me have an authentic holly jolly time…
Sasha
Scrooge was right when he said “bah humbug” to Christmas. This time of year sucks balls, and not the fun kind. I’ve just lost my crappy part-time job and I’m slowly sinking under a sea of student loan debt and crushed dreams.
Just when I think my life couldn’t possibly get any worse, my cat and I are abducted by an alien who wants me to help him experience a "real human Christmas" on his ship. WTF? Clearly he’s chosen the worst possible candidate for the job.
But there’s something about Khephren’s enthusiasm and eternal optimism that starts to melt even my grumpy, cynical heart. Heck, I even agree to be his fake fiancé to get his parents off his back! I don’t know what’s happening to me, but Khephren’s charm is making me feel things I never have before. And those bright pink tentacles of his are strangely fascinating. I can’t help but wonder what all they can do…
As we spend more time together, I start to realize I might not want to go home and that maybe, just maybe, I’ve found what I’ve always secretly been yearning for. Could Khephren feel the same? If so, it would be a Christmas miracle and I don’t believe in those…right?
277 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 24, 2023
123 people are currently reading
165 people want to read
About the author
Chloe Archer
16 books279 followersChloe Archer writes queer sci-fi and paranormal rom-coms with laugh out loud humor, zany shenanigans, silly acronyms, and plenty of spice!
She currently call Minnesota home, but has lived abroad in places like Montreal, Edinburgh, and Tokyo. She’s hoping to relocate to Scotland permanently in the next few years if the stars align.
Chloe is a fur mama to two adorable Yorkies, Jasper and Teddy, and she loves them in a crazy dog mama kind of way. When she isn’t busy writing, she enjoys visiting friends and family, traveling, reading, binge watching movies and TV shows, and practicing her karaoke skills. She does a mean cover of Pat Benatar and Cher, or so she’s been told.
She currently call Minnesota home, but has lived abroad in places like Montreal, Edinburgh, and Tokyo. She’s hoping to relocate to Scotland permanently in the next few years if the stars align.
Chloe is a fur mama to two adorable Yorkies, Jasper and Teddy, and she loves them in a crazy dog mama kind of way. When she isn’t busy writing, she enjoys visiting friends and family, traveling, reading, binge watching movies and TV shows, and practicing her karaoke skills. She does a mean cover of Pat Benatar and Cher, or so she’s been told.
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November 6, 2024
All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles by Chloe Archer is the first book in the ten book multi author series, Tinsel and Tentacles. First, this is only my second Chloe Archer book but I have to admit it’s my very first tentacle romance! It deserves five stars just for Chloe’s sheer cleverness alone. All the acronyms are hilarious. And the one liners made me smile so much! I highlighted a LOT just because they were so funny!
Khephren Thrase is from the planet, Draveth. He is mostly built the same as a human man except for his eight tentacles! On Khephren’s planet, you are either born with a warrior mark, or you aren’t. And if you aren’t, you are expected to marry a warrior for protection. Khephren’s parents are very set in the ways of their planet and are tired of waiting for him to choose his own groom, so they chose one for him.
Khephren is a very talented computer programmer. He is also absolutely obsessed with human romance movies, mostly Hallmark movies! And even more so, Christmas Hallmark movies. Khephren wants love like in the movies he has watched and is not willing to marry someone he doesn’t love. So, just like in the movies, Khephren has planned his own runaway husband scenario. And a chance to explore the galaxy as he’s always wanted to. Now he just needs to abduct a human from Earth who can help him plan the perfect Christmas, just like in the movies.
“This man ties my tentacles in knots.”
Sasha lives in Los Angeles. He doesn’t have any friends, he’s buried in debt, and just got fired from a job he didn’t like anyway. His only companion is his beloved cat. And to top off the worst day ever, he is abducted by an alien space ship on his way home. Whose captain is an alien with tentacles. Only, the alien whose name is Khephren, is really kind to him. Nicer than any human has been in years. And the longer they are together, the more he likes being on the ship with Khephren and his two friends. The more he starts to have feelings for him and wonder if he even wants to return to Earth.
“I’m seriously attracted to this sweet, pink-tentacled, computer-programming, Christmas-obsessed nerd. And I don’t know what to do about it. After all, there’s the slightly awkward fact that he did abduct me against my will. But I’m mostly over that already.”
This really was so cute. I love reading holiday books and try to read a variety of different types. So of course, I had to include one with tentacles! And I’m so glad I did. It was full of sweet, swoony, smiley moments. And I adored Khephren’s obsession with all things Hallmark. He based all his romantic knowledge on what he learned watching Hallmark romances and it was adorable. It even includes not only an epilogue but a fun bonus chapter. So buckle in and get ready for all the cuteness you can handle.
“Christmas is just as magical as the Hallmark movies make it out to be!”
For more about this book and so many others, come and visit me at Carol's Crazy Bookish World.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/Carol...
Khephren Thrase is from the planet, Draveth. He is mostly built the same as a human man except for his eight tentacles! On Khephren’s planet, you are either born with a warrior mark, or you aren’t. And if you aren’t, you are expected to marry a warrior for protection. Khephren’s parents are very set in the ways of their planet and are tired of waiting for him to choose his own groom, so they chose one for him.
Khephren is a very talented computer programmer. He is also absolutely obsessed with human romance movies, mostly Hallmark movies! And even more so, Christmas Hallmark movies. Khephren wants love like in the movies he has watched and is not willing to marry someone he doesn’t love. So, just like in the movies, Khephren has planned his own runaway husband scenario. And a chance to explore the galaxy as he’s always wanted to. Now he just needs to abduct a human from Earth who can help him plan the perfect Christmas, just like in the movies.
“This man ties my tentacles in knots.”
Sasha lives in Los Angeles. He doesn’t have any friends, he’s buried in debt, and just got fired from a job he didn’t like anyway. His only companion is his beloved cat. And to top off the worst day ever, he is abducted by an alien space ship on his way home. Whose captain is an alien with tentacles. Only, the alien whose name is Khephren, is really kind to him. Nicer than any human has been in years. And the longer they are together, the more he likes being on the ship with Khephren and his two friends. The more he starts to have feelings for him and wonder if he even wants to return to Earth.
“I’m seriously attracted to this sweet, pink-tentacled, computer-programming, Christmas-obsessed nerd. And I don’t know what to do about it. After all, there’s the slightly awkward fact that he did abduct me against my will. But I’m mostly over that already.”
This really was so cute. I love reading holiday books and try to read a variety of different types. So of course, I had to include one with tentacles! And I’m so glad I did. It was full of sweet, swoony, smiley moments. And I adored Khephren’s obsession with all things Hallmark. He based all his romantic knowledge on what he learned watching Hallmark romances and it was adorable. It even includes not only an epilogue but a fun bonus chapter. So buckle in and get ready for all the cuteness you can handle.
“Christmas is just as magical as the Hallmark movies make it out to be!”
For more about this book and so many others, come and visit me at Carol's Crazy Bookish World.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/Carol...
November 25, 2023
Light-hearted, very cute, very silly - sometimes a little too silly for my liking but still an enjoyable read. 😊
December 4, 2024
"He feels so right to me --like he should be mine and I his."
An adorable grumpy/sunshine pairing. I just loved the holiday smoopyness. Khephren was absolutely precious. His enthusiasm for life was infectious. Even the surly human Sasha couldn't resist! It was the cutest thing ever seeing these two dance around their feelings for one another. Even Khephren's two best friends could tell they were head over heels for one another.
Sasha may have started their space adventure being abducted from his life on Earth, but it soon becomes apparent it wasn't much of a life at all. On board the Sleigh Belle he slowly discovers how different his life could be. He could have friends who become family and he could have the love of the absolute sweetest alien in the galaxy.
The scene where Sasha and River get to meet via space video is amazing. I knew right away those two would get on like a house on fire. No shame, the both of them. It would be so fun if we could see more of them interacting in a future Tentacular Tales book. I bet River would love Khephren too. Like Sasha realizes, it's truly impossible not to fall in love with that pink tentacled alien.
An adorable grumpy/sunshine pairing. I just loved the holiday smoopyness. Khephren was absolutely precious. His enthusiasm for life was infectious. Even the surly human Sasha couldn't resist! It was the cutest thing ever seeing these two dance around their feelings for one another. Even Khephren's two best friends could tell they were head over heels for one another.
Sasha may have started their space adventure being abducted from his life on Earth, but it soon becomes apparent it wasn't much of a life at all. On board the Sleigh Belle he slowly discovers how different his life could be. He could have friends who become family and he could have the love of the absolute sweetest alien in the galaxy.
The scene where Sasha and River get to meet via space video is amazing. I knew right away those two would get on like a house on fire. No shame, the both of them. It would be so fun if we could see more of them interacting in a future Tentacular Tales book. I bet River would love Khephren too. Like Sasha realizes, it's truly impossible not to fall in love with that pink tentacled alien.
December 2, 2023
Thank you to Mindless Elf Indulgence for gifting me this book!
This was everything I expected and possibly more. I adored Khephren, and Sasha's cynicism eventually gave way to real feelings and heart flutters. Set in the same universe (ha!) as the Tentacular Tales of River and Kai, this story was a delightful way to spend a few hours.
Loved it!!
This was everything I expected and possibly more. I adored Khephren, and Sasha's cynicism eventually gave way to real feelings and heart flutters. Set in the same universe (ha!) as the Tentacular Tales of River and Kai, this story was a delightful way to spend a few hours.
Loved it!!
December 6, 2023
Round up 3.5 ⭐️
Well, that was surprisingly fun and super silly 😝 This was my very first book by this author, not to mention my first-ever Alien romance, lol 😆 (finally, I can check the box)
Khephren (the alien warrior) pulled a runaway bride-style...groom? And off he goes to Earth to experience the most wondrous time of year, Christmas 🎄.
Khephren is obsessed with human movies, especially Christmas hallmark movies, and wants to experience falling in love like those cheesy Christmas movies 😆. So he did what any alien would do: find a human and abduct him to show him Christmas magic.
Earthling Sasha is the equivalent of the human Grinch, and who to blame him? He just lost his job, and in dept and on top of that, he got abducted too, with his cat (Jonesy), of course, 😆 in Khephren's world, cats are considered gods. That conversation was funny and adorable at the same time.
Khephren was cute and super sweet. Sasha just couldn't help but fall for him.
The story was cute and sweet, filled with silliness and maybe some over-the-top scenarios, but uniquely funny. All the alien conversations about Earth were amusing. Loved all the side characters, especially Khephren's friends.
I am looking forward to the next book in the series. Hopefully, 🤞 it's Najar's book.
My only criticism is the last few chapters dragged on. It could have been cut short.
*I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book through GRR.
Well, that was surprisingly fun and super silly 😝 This was my very first book by this author, not to mention my first-ever Alien romance, lol 😆 (finally, I can check the box)
Khephren (the alien warrior) pulled a runaway bride-style...groom? And off he goes to Earth to experience the most wondrous time of year, Christmas 🎄.
Khephren is obsessed with human movies, especially Christmas hallmark movies, and wants to experience falling in love like those cheesy Christmas movies 😆. So he did what any alien would do: find a human and abduct him to show him Christmas magic.
Earthling Sasha is the equivalent of the human Grinch, and who to blame him? He just lost his job, and in dept and on top of that, he got abducted too, with his cat (Jonesy), of course, 😆 in Khephren's world, cats are considered gods. That conversation was funny and adorable at the same time.
Khephren was cute and super sweet. Sasha just couldn't help but fall for him.
The story was cute and sweet, filled with silliness and maybe some over-the-top scenarios, but uniquely funny. All the alien conversations about Earth were amusing. Loved all the side characters, especially Khephren's friends.
I am looking forward to the next book in the series. Hopefully, 🤞 it's Najar's book.
My only criticism is the last few chapters dragged on. It could have been cut short.
*I voluntarily reviewed a complimentary copy of this book through GRR.
December 6, 2024
If you loved the other “tentacled” books, you’ll like this one, too 🐙
Before we start: If in doubt, get the audio. It’s Greg Boudreaux, and it’s absolutely top tier. This man deserves more than 5 stars for the books he narrates 🤩
As for the book: You could call it a spinoff of the “Tentacular Tales” series. It could be read as a standalone, but you wouldn’t fully appreciate the cameos of Kai, River and the bonus chapter with Captain Starblade and Lord Vardox, so if you haven’t read them yet, I’d pick up those before this one.
Here, we have Khephren, a tentacled runaway groom, who’s obsessed with Hallmark movies from Earth, and who kidnaps a human from Earth to help him recreate a realistic Christmas. Said kidnapped human is Sasha (and his cat), a screenwriter from LA, a cynic who has stopped believing in Christmas magic years ago.
To make it short: it’s hilarious. I started to smile involuntarily so often while listening, it really cracked me up. Again, you get A LOT of pop cultural references (the R2D2 lookalike android called Rocky who drops movie lines? Or the not-a-holodeck with the acronym ARSE? And Khephren not getting the joke, because his neurolingual chip only used American English? 🤣
Annnnyway. Read/listen to it if you’re in the mood for an OTT, extremely funny, completely drama free, Christmassy space opera.
Loved it 🥰
Before we start: If in doubt, get the audio. It’s Greg Boudreaux, and it’s absolutely top tier. This man deserves more than 5 stars for the books he narrates 🤩
As for the book: You could call it a spinoff of the “Tentacular Tales” series. It could be read as a standalone, but you wouldn’t fully appreciate the cameos of Kai, River and the bonus chapter with Captain Starblade and Lord Vardox, so if you haven’t read them yet, I’d pick up those before this one.
Here, we have Khephren, a tentacled runaway groom, who’s obsessed with Hallmark movies from Earth, and who kidnaps a human from Earth to help him recreate a realistic Christmas. Said kidnapped human is Sasha (and his cat), a screenwriter from LA, a cynic who has stopped believing in Christmas magic years ago.
To make it short: it’s hilarious. I started to smile involuntarily so often while listening, it really cracked me up. Again, you get A LOT of pop cultural references (the R2D2 lookalike android called Rocky who drops movie lines? Or the not-a-holodeck with the acronym ARSE? And Khephren not getting the joke, because his neurolingual chip only used American English? 🤣
Annnnyway. Read/listen to it if you’re in the mood for an OTT, extremely funny, completely drama free, Christmassy space opera.
Loved it 🥰
dnf
December 2, 2023DNF pg 103 (36%)
Too silly for words.
Too silly for words.
December 4, 2024
2.5⭐
If almost half of this book were cut out, this would be a funny Christmas romp with runaway alien groom abducting a human Grinch, and them bonding over movies and falling in love. This is very silly, but fun in many places.
BUT. There's the other half of completely unnecessary and boring stuff.
Sasha seems to go through with the same circle of "shouldn't I be more freaked out - oh he's hot and adorbs and the tentacles are kinda...uh - oh no, this will end in a few weeks" track almost every chapter.
Oh, why is the cat getting suddenly fat after 3 days in the alien spaceship? It must be the kibble. Let's talk about the kibble several times. The fact that the cat was in heat and had run off in page 3 has nothing to do with this.
The acronym of the "holodeck" was ARSE. I needed to be reminded about this 5 times, because otherwise I wouldn't remember what this suddenly mentioned ARSE was.
In a book about tentacle aliens and other tentacle alien books and all the talk about tentacle porn, there was very little of actual tentacle porn. In fact, the whole book had way too much talking about things compared to actual things happening.
But the actual things that happened (at least for the first time) were pretty fun.
A couple of silly tentacle books that are also good:
Wriggle & Sparkle - The Complete Collection
Earth Fathers Are Weird
If almost half of this book were cut out, this would be a funny Christmas romp with runaway alien groom abducting a human Grinch, and them bonding over movies and falling in love. This is very silly, but fun in many places.
BUT. There's the other half of completely unnecessary and boring stuff.
Sasha seems to go through with the same circle of "shouldn't I be more freaked out - oh he's hot and adorbs and the tentacles are kinda...uh - oh no, this will end in a few weeks" track almost every chapter.
Oh, why is the cat getting suddenly fat after 3 days in the alien spaceship? It must be the kibble. Let's talk about the kibble several times. The fact that the cat was in heat and had run off in page 3 has nothing to do with this.
The acronym of the "holodeck" was ARSE. I needed to be reminded about this 5 times, because otherwise I wouldn't remember what this suddenly mentioned ARSE was.
In a book about tentacle aliens and other tentacle alien books and all the talk about tentacle porn, there was very little of actual tentacle porn. In fact, the whole book had way too much talking about things compared to actual things happening.
But the actual things that happened (at least for the first time) were pretty fun.
A couple of silly tentacle books that are also good:
Wriggle & Sparkle - The Complete Collection
Earth Fathers Are Weird
December 4, 2023
This is set in the same world as the author's Tentacular Tales series (with cameos and a spicy Bonus Chapter at the end starring Capt. Starblade and Lord Vardox!) but works as a standalone.
It's a sweet and fun read with a Christmas in space setting. Khephren is completely adorable as an alien yearning for the perfect Christmas like he's seen in all those Hallmark movies and his abducted human guest Sasha is just the grumpy, Christmas-hating man to give it to him.
If you love Tentacular Tales, you will enjoy this one too. If you haven't read them, it's a good introduction to the author's writing style. Fun, sweet, sexy and snarky. It was a quick, enjoyable, tentacle-filled read.
It's a sweet and fun read with a Christmas in space setting. Khephren is completely adorable as an alien yearning for the perfect Christmas like he's seen in all those Hallmark movies and his abducted human guest Sasha is just the grumpy, Christmas-hating man to give it to him.
If you love Tentacular Tales, you will enjoy this one too. If you haven't read them, it's a good introduction to the author's writing style. Fun, sweet, sexy and snarky. It was a quick, enjoyable, tentacle-filled read.
January 13, 2024
Very cute overall, with some silliness and lots of sweetness. Khephren and Sasha were adorable together. It was all very low-angst with lots of Christmas vibes. Sasha starts out being a grinch but he ends up falling in love with a pink alien and their romance is fun and unique. Khephren's friends are also great side characters. It dragged a bit at the end though. I did like hearing about a couple characters from the author's Tentacular Tales series.
December 24, 2023
December 2023
Kindle edition
It was alright. The alien trio were sweet and protective. The movie thing was an interesting way to bond and to push the plot along. I did like the cat and how she was mistaken as a goddess. It felt like their story was done with minimal interruption and the rest was used as a promo for another series.
Kindle edition
It was alright. The alien trio were sweet and protective. The movie thing was an interesting way to bond and to push the plot along. I did like the cat and how she was mistaken as a goddess. It felt like their story was done with minimal interruption and the rest was used as a promo for another series.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 24, 2023
I absolutely ADORE Chloe Archer's Tentacular Tales series and was beyond excited to hear we were getting a spin-off story, set in the same universe (oohhhh, that's punny!) with a Christmas storyline to boot as part of a multi-author Christmas series release. Sign. Me. Up!!!
I loved Khephren and Sasha, from their ridiculous tropetastic meet-cute through to their seriously sexy UST and on to their romance; they're equally adorable, adorkable and everything you have come to expect from this author when it comes to alien/human relationships.
I loved the tech, I loved the secondary characters, I love the way space is described, I love that cat as god is a thing in Khephren's world, I love the way Christmas is interpreted by Khephren and his crew, right down to the weird tree!
You don't need to have read the Tentacular Tales series to be able to read this book, though I do recommend you do at some stage because duh, tentacles! So. Much. Fun!!
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
(We better get Najar's romance because that's a man who needs someone who gets him!)
I loved Khephren and Sasha, from their ridiculous tropetastic meet-cute through to their seriously sexy UST and on to their romance; they're equally adorable, adorkable and everything you have come to expect from this author when it comes to alien/human relationships.
I loved the tech, I loved the secondary characters, I love the way space is described, I love that cat as god is a thing in Khephren's world, I love the way Christmas is interpreted by Khephren and his crew, right down to the weird tree!
You don't need to have read the Tentacular Tales series to be able to read this book, though I do recommend you do at some stage because duh, tentacles! So. Much. Fun!!
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
(We better get Najar's romance because that's a man who needs someone who gets him!)
June 2, 2025
4,5☆ - sooo cute and wholesome 😍❤️🐙
December 25, 2024
This was exactly what it says on the tin: a funny, over the top romcom with the most ridiculous premise I've read so far. There were moments I laughed so hard I cried, there were moments I cringed and wanted to drop the book, and there was a lot of movie references thrown around. TBH it's more like a three-star book, but I had fun and that's what counts the most.
December 5, 2024
Too juvenile for my dusty old sensibilities. Throws dentures. It's surprising, since I love both her Tentacular Tales and Monsters Hollow series
It would have helped if the word "tentacle" didn't pop up constantly. Okay, yes, we get it! The three cute, multicolored aliens have tentacles! It's the whole point of the story. We haven't forgotten since the last paragraph. For fuck's sake.
It would have helped if the word "tentacle" didn't pop up constantly. Okay, yes, we get it! The three cute, multicolored aliens have tentacles! It's the whole point of the story. We haven't forgotten since the last paragraph. For fuck's sake.
December 26, 2023
A Joyfully Jay review.
2.75 stars
This story is part of Tinsel and Tentacles, a multi-author winter holiday tentacle romance collection, and it felt too shallow for me. Don’t look for deep, intricate world building and plot, because that’s not what this book is about. Instead, it’s a silly, wacky, little romcom about a human kidnapped by a trio of aliens, one of them hotter, sweeter, and more hung than the others.
As someone for whom world building is my favorite part of a book, this lack of it left me ambivalent — and left the book with a harder sell, because it now relied upon the strength of the characters and their relationship to keep me invested. Unfortunately, the characters are inconsistent, seeming to randomly change opinions and personalities to suit the story.
Read Elizabeth’s review in its entirety here.
2.75 stars
This story is part of Tinsel and Tentacles, a multi-author winter holiday tentacle romance collection, and it felt too shallow for me. Don’t look for deep, intricate world building and plot, because that’s not what this book is about. Instead, it’s a silly, wacky, little romcom about a human kidnapped by a trio of aliens, one of them hotter, sweeter, and more hung than the others.
As someone for whom world building is my favorite part of a book, this lack of it left me ambivalent — and left the book with a harder sell, because it now relied upon the strength of the characters and their relationship to keep me invested. Unfortunately, the characters are inconsistent, seeming to randomly change opinions and personalities to suit the story.
Read Elizabeth’s review in its entirety here.
November 24, 2023
This was the sweetest cozy Christmas MM I’ve ever read and I loved it!
🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙
Who knew I was into tentacle spice? This MM intergalactic holiday adventure was so good!
Khephren is being forced into an arranged marriage. But being a house husband is not his dream. His dream to go on adventures in the galaxy, but mostly, he dreams to have real earth Christmas like he’s seen in all the holiday hallmark movies he’s downloaded from the galactic dark web.
Sacha’s current life on earth just sucks. His family has disowned him for being gay, he broke and he’s struggling to be a famous director in films. So it’s just him and his Instagram famous cat Jonsey. Life just couldn’t get any worse. At least, so he thought. That is, until he gets abducted.
This story was so freaking funny. I loved the connection between the two MMC and LOVED the side characters that just really pulled this whole holiday book together. It was fun and spicy.
🐙Grumpy Sunshine
🐙A droid that only responds with movie sayings
🐙Fake fiancé
🐙Alien Abduction
🐙Runaway Groom
🐙MM & HEA
Thank you Chloe for the advanced copy!! I can’t wait to read all of your backlog of stories. 🫶🏼
All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles is out Nov 24th. Add this one to you TBR asap!
🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙🐙
Who knew I was into tentacle spice? This MM intergalactic holiday adventure was so good!
Khephren is being forced into an arranged marriage. But being a house husband is not his dream. His dream to go on adventures in the galaxy, but mostly, he dreams to have real earth Christmas like he’s seen in all the holiday hallmark movies he’s downloaded from the galactic dark web.
Sacha’s current life on earth just sucks. His family has disowned him for being gay, he broke and he’s struggling to be a famous director in films. So it’s just him and his Instagram famous cat Jonsey. Life just couldn’t get any worse. At least, so he thought. That is, until he gets abducted.
This story was so freaking funny. I loved the connection between the two MMC and LOVED the side characters that just really pulled this whole holiday book together. It was fun and spicy.
🐙Grumpy Sunshine
🐙A droid that only responds with movie sayings
🐙Fake fiancé
🐙Alien Abduction
🐙Runaway Groom
🐙MM & HEA
Thank you Chloe for the advanced copy!! I can’t wait to read all of your backlog of stories. 🫶🏼
All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles is out Nov 24th. Add this one to you TBR asap!
November 28, 2023
While this is the first book released in the multi-author Tinsel and Tentacles series it takes place in Chloe's Tentacular Tales world. It does read completely fine as a standalone but has some cameos from our favorite characters. Khephren, Tentacle boy, is the perfect ray of sunshine to Sasha's pessimistic grumpy MC. After a bumpy start, who wouldn't be upset if they were abducted by aliens, Sasha is slowly brought around to believing in Christmas miracles again. The pace, while slightly insta-love, feels very good for these two, and I really loved Luna and Najar too.
December 5, 2023
This was a sweet Christmas romance with strong themes of found family. Khephren is an alien obsessed with Christmas (as learned through Hallmark movies) and after escaping an arranged marriage, he goes to Earth to enlist (abduct) a holiday expert. Instead he gets Sasha, whose Christmas spirit faded years ago after a traumatic experience on Christmas. Khephren is genuinely the sweetest, most loving partner Sasha could have imagined, and together there is so much joy, humor, and healing. I also adored the tie-in to the Tentacular Tales series, and if you've read any of that series, this will be an even more fun read.
May 19, 2024
Ehhh it was alright, cute I'd say? But just wasn't feeling it so much ig, eishhh😭
December 15, 2024
4.5 ⭐️
3 🌶️
Super cute, enjoyed this very much! Even got a little glimpse at our favorite tentacle p**n writer and his alien hubby + family!! Cozy, but kept me interested at every turn!
3 🌶️
Super cute, enjoyed this very much! Even got a little glimpse at our favorite tentacle p**n writer and his alien hubby + family!! Cozy, but kept me interested at every turn!
December 31, 2024
So cute! But no shock as am I a sucker for forced prox and friends-with-benefits to lovers, especially when there’s fun besties. Plus it’s a holiday story! Win win win win!
Read
December 16, 2025If you give a friend Christmas-themed tentacle smut (as a joke), she might ask you to read it too (AS A JOKE)
January 13, 2025
This was cute and sweet. A little out there but very enjoyable. I liked the little cameo of River and Kai, plus the bonus chapter.
December 12, 2024
"𝙒𝙚 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙮𝙚𝙡𝙡𝙤𝙬 𝙗𝙧𝙞𝙘𝙠 𝙧𝙤𝙖𝙙 𝙖𝙢𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙨!"
Aʟʟ I Wᴀɴᴛ ꜰᴏʀ Cʜʀɪsᴛᴍᴀs ɪs Tᴇɴᴛᴀᴄʟᴇs • Chloe Archer
Tinsel & Tentacles
🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
Khephren doesn't want to go through with his arranged marriage and wants to experience Christmas the same way Earthlings do so he runs away from his wedding and abducts Sasha, and Jonsey, hoping for the Christmas he's always wished for and unaware of the extra magic it will bring.
Khephren and Sasha had me laughing, crying, and swooning through the entire book. These two were everything I didn't know I needed in my life. I love how adorably romantic Khephren is and how he brought back Sasha's Christmas spirit. I love this found family and hope to see more of them in the future.
A year ago this was my first experience with Chloe Archer, a year later this book is just as great as it was the first time I read it, and this time around was made even better with the audiobook and narration by Greg Boudreaux. Greg outdid himself again with fantastic narration and bringing the story to life. I can see this audiobook becoming a yearly listen.
Get ready for... mm, sci-fi, alien/human, alien abduction, size difference, grumpy/sunshine, runaway groom, fake fiancé, found family, romantic comedy, pansexual, holiday (Christmas), and first-person point of view.
**Review Updated December 2024**
Aʟʟ I Wᴀɴᴛ ꜰᴏʀ Cʜʀɪsᴛᴍᴀs ɪs Tᴇɴᴛᴀᴄʟᴇs • Chloe Archer
Tinsel & Tentacles
🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁
Khephren doesn't want to go through with his arranged marriage and wants to experience Christmas the same way Earthlings do so he runs away from his wedding and abducts Sasha, and Jonsey, hoping for the Christmas he's always wished for and unaware of the extra magic it will bring.
Khephren and Sasha had me laughing, crying, and swooning through the entire book. These two were everything I didn't know I needed in my life. I love how adorably romantic Khephren is and how he brought back Sasha's Christmas spirit. I love this found family and hope to see more of them in the future.
A year ago this was my first experience with Chloe Archer, a year later this book is just as great as it was the first time I read it, and this time around was made even better with the audiobook and narration by Greg Boudreaux. Greg outdid himself again with fantastic narration and bringing the story to life. I can see this audiobook becoming a yearly listen.
Get ready for... mm, sci-fi, alien/human, alien abduction, size difference, grumpy/sunshine, runaway groom, fake fiancé, found family, romantic comedy, pansexual, holiday (Christmas), and first-person point of view.
**Review Updated December 2024**
December 24, 2024
I was given this as a gag gift for Christmas and it did not disappoint! I don’t think I’m necessarily into the tentacle side of things but the story was hilarious and it’s a perfect light read for switching up genres. I also love Jonesey.
December 8, 2024
One of the most unconventional Christmas love stories I've ever read. Pink-all-over tentacled alien is a runaway groom from an arranged marriage and is a huge fan of Hallmark Christmas movies and wants to experience the holiday. His idea? To kindly take (abduct) a human from Earth who can show him and his best friends the magic of the holidays. Sasha, recently fired, full of debts, human and his best furpal cat Jonesy are the (un)lucky ones being abducted. Talk about unconventional meet cute! This story treats a few harder themes that are talked and discussed throughout the story, but overall this is a sweet, fluffy, and steamy love story between a golden retriever alien with kaleidoscope eyes, and a Grinch of a human who finds someone who treats him the way nobody else has ever done, tearing down walls, giving him hope and giving him back the spark he had lost. It's set in the same universe as the Tentacular Tales and there are very fun cameos that you don't want to miss. It's funny and it felt like a cuddle, a mug of delicious hot chocolate. I loved it!0
December 23, 2023
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Rating: ⭐⭐⭐
I discovered this series while checking L Eveland’s books and decided to give it a go! Tentacles are not the most common ¿kink? in romance, and most the books that include them tend to be mostly erotica (which I don’t mind sometimes, but I’d rather read a highly steamy romance than an erotic one, if you know what I mean). I was intrigued by the concept of this series since I know some of the authors.
As always, even though the series doesn’t follow a set order and can be read however you like (the characters are different in each series, which is a pity. The only thing in common is that every book has some kind of tentacled character), I decided to read this following the publishing order, which makes this the first one.
I’ve only read one book (if I’m not wrong) by this author (The Orc and the Manny) which I didn’t quite like hahahaha But I went for this title with an open mind and I was nicely rewarded since I enjoyed it quite a lot! This book is related to the author’s Tentacular Tales, but it’s not necessary to have read it to enjoy this one (I haven’t and I didn’t have any problem at all).
The story follows Sasha, a grumpy human who hates everything Christmas related since the Christmas he was thrown out by his family after coming out to them, and Khephren, an alien who loves Hallmark movies and dreams of traveling the Universe.
But Khephren’s dreams crash with what his parents want for him, and suddenly he finds himself running from his own wedding pure rom-com style and departing from his planet alongside his two best friends. Destination? Earth!
They can’t wait to enjoy a true human Christmas time, but they are not allowed to visit Earth and so they decide to respectfully kidnap a human to help them enjoy the festivities without getting out of their ship.
It’s not a complicated story, neither the deepest one. But it’s fun and entertaining, and just the kind of light and uncomplicated story I was looking for. The romance is quick but doesn’t feel too rushed (which I was dreading, since that’s exactly how the story in The Orc and the Manny developed: fast and rushed). I enjoyed seeing them becoming friends, and then something more.
As I was hoping, it’s not too erotic. Actually, I wouldn’t have minded a bit more steam hahaha It turned out to be a super sweet and funny story about a grumpy Grinch and a Christmas lover who find a family in each other.
As I said, I haven’t read the Tentacular Tales series, but I was left craving to try it!
I still haven’t read more books in the series, and I was a bit bummed when I discovered the other characters (as Khephren’s BF slash bodyguard slash protector) doesn’t have his own book. I was expecting for another author to maybe write it… but no. Now, I’m hoping for Chloe to write a book about him, but I’m not sure it will happen.
However, I’ll definitely keep reading this series. Next book is by Delaney Rain and I usually lover her stories, so I’m feeling really hyped by it!
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐
I discovered this series while checking L Eveland’s books and decided to give it a go! Tentacles are not the most common ¿kink? in romance, and most the books that include them tend to be mostly erotica (which I don’t mind sometimes, but I’d rather read a highly steamy romance than an erotic one, if you know what I mean). I was intrigued by the concept of this series since I know some of the authors.
As always, even though the series doesn’t follow a set order and can be read however you like (the characters are different in each series, which is a pity. The only thing in common is that every book has some kind of tentacled character), I decided to read this following the publishing order, which makes this the first one.
I’ve only read one book (if I’m not wrong) by this author (The Orc and the Manny) which I didn’t quite like hahahaha But I went for this title with an open mind and I was nicely rewarded since I enjoyed it quite a lot! This book is related to the author’s Tentacular Tales, but it’s not necessary to have read it to enjoy this one (I haven’t and I didn’t have any problem at all).
The story follows Sasha, a grumpy human who hates everything Christmas related since the Christmas he was thrown out by his family after coming out to them, and Khephren, an alien who loves Hallmark movies and dreams of traveling the Universe.
But Khephren’s dreams crash with what his parents want for him, and suddenly he finds himself running from his own wedding pure rom-com style and departing from his planet alongside his two best friends. Destination? Earth!
They can’t wait to enjoy a true human Christmas time, but they are not allowed to visit Earth and so they decide to respectfully kidnap a human to help them enjoy the festivities without getting out of their ship.
It’s not a complicated story, neither the deepest one. But it’s fun and entertaining, and just the kind of light and uncomplicated story I was looking for. The romance is quick but doesn’t feel too rushed (which I was dreading, since that’s exactly how the story in The Orc and the Manny developed: fast and rushed). I enjoyed seeing them becoming friends, and then something more.
As I was hoping, it’s not too erotic. Actually, I wouldn’t have minded a bit more steam hahaha It turned out to be a super sweet and funny story about a grumpy Grinch and a Christmas lover who find a family in each other.
As I said, I haven’t read the Tentacular Tales series, but I was left craving to try it!
I still haven’t read more books in the series, and I was a bit bummed when I discovered the other characters (as Khephren’s BF slash bodyguard slash protector) doesn’t have his own book. I was expecting for another author to maybe write it… but no. Now, I’m hoping for Chloe to write a book about him, but I’m not sure it will happen.
However, I’ll definitely keep reading this series. Next book is by Delaney Rain and I usually lover her stories, so I’m feeling really hyped by it!
January 25, 2024
My favorite of the series and one I’m highly recommending any time of the year.
Rating: 5🌈
Chloe Archer had me at every single aspect of this story, from the disillusioned Grinch of a human who’s lost his job as an “elf” to the small ship full of found family tentacled aliens, complete with a runaway groom, arriving at Earth with visions of Hallmark Christmases and rom-com movies abounding in their heads!
I laughed, smiled, and just delighted in all the many imaginative elements and great scenarios that Archer incorporates into this imaginative sci fy holiday romance. It’s got adorable aliens escaping a totalitarian world where only warriors are celebrated and those with other personalities and other types of skills and abilities are deemed lesser or weaker in nature.
One is, in fact, a wealthy IT alien, Khephren, who’s a definite fan of the Earth rom-coms and Hallmark movies. Yep , these will survive into the future , was there ever any doubt? This is such a hilarious and perfect idea and it’s used beautifully throughout this storyline.
Holodeck anyone?
Anyway, Khep goes all runaway groom, as one does, after seeing those movies and heads for Earth with his small found family of friends with similar problems. Which I love. Archer has a great way with characters, alien and human.
There Kheph kidnaps/encounters a depressed human , Sasha. Recently fired, and with a very sad past. Cue the restoration of Christmas spirit to the Scrooge human by aliens!
Honestly, this is such a joyful, hilarious, and heartwarming story. The characters have been given such depth that, human or alien, the reader connects with them easily and comes to care about them greatly.
Even that “Christmas tree” that arrives on board. More pls.
I would love to see where this merry crew is next Christmas. What’s happening with the show and what worlds they’ve visited.
I’m hooked. My favorite of the series and one I’m highly recommending any time of the year.
Tinsel and Tentacles (11 books)
- [ ] Jingle Bells and Elder Gods by Kiernan Kelly
- [x] All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles by Chloe Archer ❤️🫶
- [x] Tentacles and Other Stocking Stuffers by Delaney Rain
- [ ] Tentacles Rock by K.C. Carmine
- [x] A Sucker for Christmas by J.P. Sayle
- [x] Kraken Klaus by Charlotte Brice
- [x] Twelve Days of Squidmas by H.L. Hiers
- [x] It’s a Tenta-ful Life by Amanda Muewissen
- [x] Rebel without a Claus by L Eveland
- [x] Cthulhu for Christmas by Meghan Maslow ❤️🫶
- [ ] Tentacle Wonderland by Reese Morrison
Rating: 5🌈
Chloe Archer had me at every single aspect of this story, from the disillusioned Grinch of a human who’s lost his job as an “elf” to the small ship full of found family tentacled aliens, complete with a runaway groom, arriving at Earth with visions of Hallmark Christmases and rom-com movies abounding in their heads!
I laughed, smiled, and just delighted in all the many imaginative elements and great scenarios that Archer incorporates into this imaginative sci fy holiday romance. It’s got adorable aliens escaping a totalitarian world where only warriors are celebrated and those with other personalities and other types of skills and abilities are deemed lesser or weaker in nature.
One is, in fact, a wealthy IT alien, Khephren, who’s a definite fan of the Earth rom-coms and Hallmark movies. Yep , these will survive into the future , was there ever any doubt? This is such a hilarious and perfect idea and it’s used beautifully throughout this storyline.
Holodeck anyone?
Anyway, Khep goes all runaway groom, as one does, after seeing those movies and heads for Earth with his small found family of friends with similar problems. Which I love. Archer has a great way with characters, alien and human.
There Kheph kidnaps/encounters a depressed human , Sasha. Recently fired, and with a very sad past. Cue the restoration of Christmas spirit to the Scrooge human by aliens!
Honestly, this is such a joyful, hilarious, and heartwarming story. The characters have been given such depth that, human or alien, the reader connects with them easily and comes to care about them greatly.
Even that “Christmas tree” that arrives on board. More pls.
I would love to see where this merry crew is next Christmas. What’s happening with the show and what worlds they’ve visited.
I’m hooked. My favorite of the series and one I’m highly recommending any time of the year.
Tinsel and Tentacles (11 books)
- [ ] Jingle Bells and Elder Gods by Kiernan Kelly
- [x] All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles by Chloe Archer ❤️🫶
- [x] Tentacles and Other Stocking Stuffers by Delaney Rain
- [ ] Tentacles Rock by K.C. Carmine
- [x] A Sucker for Christmas by J.P. Sayle
- [x] Kraken Klaus by Charlotte Brice
- [x] Twelve Days of Squidmas by H.L. Hiers
- [x] It’s a Tenta-ful Life by Amanda Muewissen
- [x] Rebel without a Claus by L Eveland
- [x] Cthulhu for Christmas by Meghan Maslow ❤️🫶
- [ ] Tentacle Wonderland by Reese Morrison
December 8, 2023
Tentacleiffic Fun
All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles
A WINTER HOLIDAY MM TENTACLE ROMANCE TINSEL AND TENTACLES
CHLOE ARCHER
Archer is At it again with her naughty acronyms for organisations and systems in this spin off from the River and Kai series.
For starters, there's Privately Relayed Intergalactic Communication and Knowledge System.
In this novel, Khephren is an adorable six foot tall pink alien with tentacles and long magenta hair.
Unfortunately he has not been born into a warrior class, so his meddling parents have set him up with a husband.
As he's obsessed with Earth films, he uses the runaway bridw trope, instead becoming a runaway groom on his ship the Sleigh Belle, along with his two best friends, Najar and Luna.
Kephren is, as one character puts it, a "tentacled, computer-programming, Christmas-obsessed nerd."
So his cunning plan is to find a human with similar taste and 'invite' them aboard his ship to recreate a perfect Hallmark style Christmas.
Sasha is a failed elf who couldn't hold down at job at Santa's Winter Wonderland past two weeks. His cat Jonesy - nerds and geeks will recognise this cat name - are both independent, grumpy, and hate fake Christmas cheer.
For Sasha, as we learn more about his history, it makes sense.
Before he knows it, he and his cat are abducted by Kephren and his crew to help them discover lots about Christmas.
He's a bit put out at first, but once he realises what the friends are like, somehow the Christmas grump finds himself attracted to the pink alien.
And the cat just carries on being herself.
Captain Ellie Genaro and other characters make an appearance, which is fun. There's lots of seasonal cheer, found family joy, laughter, steam and growing romance.
Sasha's dream of making films seems to mesh well with Keph's computer simulation programme and chemistry plus sweetness win the day.
One of the best bits in the book, is, however, the Christmas tree Kephren finds for the ship in his attempt to instil Sasha with renewed Christmas Spirit.
Best. Bit. Ever.
I seriously laughed so loud I was snorting.
I loved the whole thing and the meditative parts on the LGBTQIA+ community, mental health issues and found family.
I can't wait to see more of how this and River's worlds combine at some point.
All I Want for Christmas is Tentacles
A WINTER HOLIDAY MM TENTACLE ROMANCE TINSEL AND TENTACLES
CHLOE ARCHER
Archer is At it again with her naughty acronyms for organisations and systems in this spin off from the River and Kai series.
For starters, there's Privately Relayed Intergalactic Communication and Knowledge System.
In this novel, Khephren is an adorable six foot tall pink alien with tentacles and long magenta hair.
Unfortunately he has not been born into a warrior class, so his meddling parents have set him up with a husband.
As he's obsessed with Earth films, he uses the runaway bridw trope, instead becoming a runaway groom on his ship the Sleigh Belle, along with his two best friends, Najar and Luna.
Kephren is, as one character puts it, a "tentacled, computer-programming, Christmas-obsessed nerd."
So his cunning plan is to find a human with similar taste and 'invite' them aboard his ship to recreate a perfect Hallmark style Christmas.
Sasha is a failed elf who couldn't hold down at job at Santa's Winter Wonderland past two weeks. His cat Jonesy - nerds and geeks will recognise this cat name - are both independent, grumpy, and hate fake Christmas cheer.
For Sasha, as we learn more about his history, it makes sense.
Before he knows it, he and his cat are abducted by Kephren and his crew to help them discover lots about Christmas.
He's a bit put out at first, but once he realises what the friends are like, somehow the Christmas grump finds himself attracted to the pink alien.
And the cat just carries on being herself.
Captain Ellie Genaro and other characters make an appearance, which is fun. There's lots of seasonal cheer, found family joy, laughter, steam and growing romance.
Sasha's dream of making films seems to mesh well with Keph's computer simulation programme and chemistry plus sweetness win the day.
One of the best bits in the book, is, however, the Christmas tree Kephren finds for the ship in his attempt to instil Sasha with renewed Christmas Spirit.
Best. Bit. Ever.
I seriously laughed so loud I was snorting.
I loved the whole thing and the meditative parts on the LGBTQIA+ community, mental health issues and found family.
I can't wait to see more of how this and River's worlds combine at some point.
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