Binding 13

Boys of Tommen #1

by Chloe Walsh, Lorena Castell García (Translator)

Una historia de amor épica e inolvidable: llega en español Binding 13, el primer libro del fenómeno de TikTok Los chicos de Tommen, de Chloe Walsh

Hasta ahora han permanecido en lados opuestos del campo, pero cuando sus dos mundos choquen, nada volverá a ser lo mismo.

Johnny Kavanagh lo tiene todo a su favor. En el campo de rugby es una fuerza imparable. Ha nacido para el estrellato y nada detendrá su camino a la cima. Ni siquiera la tímida chica nueva del Instituto Tommen. La de los ojos tristes y los moratones escondidos. La que lo distrae como nunca nadie lo ha hecho.

La vida nunca ha sido fácil para Shannon Lynch. Acosada y torturada por sus antiguas compañeras, llega a Tommen a mitad del año escolar, rezando por un nuevo comienzo y desesperada por librarse de los demonios de su pasado. En su primer día en la prestigiosa escuela privada, conoce, de forma bastante impactante, al famoso Johnny Kavanagh. Atrapada en un torbellino de sentimientos hacia él y desesperada por pasar desapercibida, Shannon se convierte una vez más en el blanco del acoso, pero la flamante estrella del rugby irlandés resulta ser un aliado de lo más inesperado.

Unidos por su frágil amistad y su innegable química, Johnny y Shannon tendrán que enfrentarse a todos los obstáculos que amenazarán el comienzo de una relación que puede ser mucho más...

Genres: Romance, Sports Romance, Sports, Friends To Lovers, Contemporary, Young Adult, Contemporary Romance

656 pages, Paperback

First published July 18, 2018

About the author

Chloe Walsh is the NYT and USA Today bestselling author of The Boys of Tommen series, which exploded in popularity on TikTok, Goodreads, and Amazon. She has been writing and publishing New Adult and Adult contemporary romance for mature audiences for over a decade. Her Tommen series has been translated into multiple languages around the world, finding bestselling success in several countries. Chloe focuses heavily on the mental health dynamics of her characters, shining a light on important, real-life topics that are close to her heart. Heavily influenced by her own real life experiences, she pens tearjerking, and often harrowing narratives, giving another perspective to, often, unspoken everyday issues. Chloe hails from West Cork, Ireland, where she continues to reside with her family.

Represented by Caitlin Mahony of WME - for business queries contact: cma@wmeagency.com

Reviews

[kendyl ʚ♡⃛ɞ (hiatus) · Rating 5 out of 5]

my original review is so long that i can’t add any more to it, but just know that i loved this even more than the first time. i put my blood, sweat, and tears into this review😩i hope it does this book justice🥺

∞ x ∞ ★’s

⁀➷ ❝binding thirteen,❞ gibsie snickered. ❝little shannon blew that shit clean out of the water.❞

my girl really did that🥹

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

𝓼𝓹𝓸𝓲𝓵𝓮𝓻 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓮 𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓲𝓮𝔀

❝bring the lights back, da. light up the world. you need to see this girl.❞
my heart leaped in my chest.
❝me?❞ i squeaked.
❝always you.❞

i have officially found a new favorite series. i’m going to start my review off by quoting myself from an update i posted a couple months ago.

╰┈➤ there’s just something so beautiful about books that can pull every single emotion out of you. the butterflies i get, finding myself smiling from ear to ear, noticing i’m silently crying when a tear drops and hits the page, even the rage i feel that lets me know how deeply connected i am with a story and/or character. nothing will ever make me feel more alive than reading.

this is just the FIRST book of the series and it has already pulled all of those emotions out of me and more. the butterflies turned into blushing. my ear to ear smile turned into laughter that had me clutching my stomach and gasping for air. my silent cries turned into violent sobs. the rage turned into literal anxiety induced fear. i’ve been chasing all of the feelings i felt when i read the addicted/calloway sisters series. i almost caught up to those feelings when i read the magnolia parks series. now, just after reading book one of boys of tommen, i finally caught and latched onto all of those feelings. it’s been the most beautiful and emotional experience that i can’t wait to share with you all throughout my review🥹

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

❥ 𝓉𝓇𝑜𝓅𝑒𝓈/𝒶𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓉𝒾𝒸:
➺ friends to lovers
➺ slow burn, tension, angst
➺ sports (rugby)
➺ found family
➺ who did this to you
➺ high school
➺ trauma (search trigger warnings!)

❥ 𝓅𝓁𝑜𝓉 𝓈𝓊𝓂𝓂𝒶𝓇𝓎:
shannon lynch and johnny kavanagh live two very different lives. at only 17 years old, johnny is well on his way to becoming a professional rugby player. he has dedicated his entire life to this sport…rugby being his only focus. no partying, no drinking, no drugs, and especially no girls. shannon lynch is a 15 year old girl in desperate need of a fresh start. when she leaves her bullies behind at her old school and transfers to tommen, her only focus is to keep a low profile. she has secrets that she wants to keep hidden. she trusts no one and tries her best not to be seen. johnny kavanagh sees her though…only her, the mysterious girl with the lonely, sad eyes. he has to stay focused on rugby, but he can’t get the look in her eyes out of his mind. he can’t get her out of his mind. what happens when she suddenly becomes his main focus? will he find out the truth? can she trust him?

❥ 𝓂𝓎 𝓉𝒽𝑜𝓊𝑔𝒽𝓉𝓈:
first and foremost, to my lovely younger readers out there…this series is listed as YA, but please trust me when i tell you that it shouldn’t be. these books have some very dark topics that they focus on so please don’t go into this thinking it’s just about some cute, fluffy romances. with that being said, this book ruined me. you can find my shattered heart scattered throughout every single page, along with all of the dried up tear stains. as heartbreaking as this story is…it’s also healing something inside of me that i didn’t even know needed healing🥹idk how to explain it. a series i went into knowing nothing about and i just immediately felt an overwhelming amount of comfort… like i’ve returned to a home i had in another life. i’m beyond excited, well, very scared, but excited nonetheless to continue this series. scared because the ending of this book was criminal, i’m still shaken up by it🥺

❥ 𝓌𝓇𝒾𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑔/𝓅𝒶𝒸𝒾𝓃𝑔:
i enjoyed the writing a lot!! since the story takes place in ireland, a lot of irish slang is used. there’s a glossary in the beginning of the book with the meanings of all the words in case you’re not familiar with them and i loved that!!! it made the writing really easy to read and it was a bonus because i’m irish🥹the writing was absolutely amazing. it blows my mind that a 600+ page book pulled me out of a reading slump that i was stuck in for a month. that’s just how you know the writing was good. as soon as i started this book, i couldn’t put it down. i was completely invested in every single page. a few of you asked me about the size difference of the books and if there was anything cut out. for example, the indie versions were really thick, the uk versions are thick, but the new bloom books editions are way thinner. basically, bloom books made the pages thinner. i’m not too sure how that works, but nothing of the original book was cut out! just thinner pages with a tiny font. please don’t let the length of the book put you off, it’s a long book for a reason. there’s so much story telling and honestly…i’m just sad it wasn’t longer.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

she closed her eyes and bit down even harder on her lip, so hard that i reached over and pulled it free from her teeth.
”don’t,” i coaxed.
her eyes popped open. “huh?”
”you’ll hurt yourself,” i told her, retracting my hand even though it was the last thing i wanted to do.
╰┈➤about to jump out of a plane with no parachute. they kill me. he kills me😩

when you continue reading, please notice the parallels between the quotes i put underneath johnny and shannon🥹🦋i’m so sick in love.

❥ 𝒿𝑜𝒽𝓃𝓃𝓎 𝓀𝒶𝓋𝒶𝓃𝒶𝑔𝒽

⁀➷ i glanced over at her and bit back a groan. she was so fucking beautiful it was painful, with those big blue eyes staring back at me all innocent and full of uncertainty.

⁀➷ i was starving for her and everything she was. every part of her. inside and out. i wanted to fight all her battles. i wanted to give her all her smiles and make her laugh and snatch her away from the rest of the world and keep her all to myself. i just wanted her. for keeps. that’s how consumed i was in this girl. that’s how much i loved her. fuck.

the hottest thing a man can be is johnny kavanagh. he’s so babygirl. so bf. johnny truly puts the gentle in gentleman. he’s the prettiest shade of green🥹i usually prefer morally grey men, but i’m so soft😩there will never be another fictional man like johnny kavanagh. cut open my heart and you’ll find him there. i love everything about his character. every time he does or says anything, i’m immediately smiling. guys i’m so down bad idek how to explain my feelings about him. i’m flustered. thank god this book was dual pov because being inside of johnny’s beautiful mind?! best experience of my life. i was 5% into the book and instantly found comfort and safety inside of his mind. like please drown me in his thoughts and i promise i’ll die a happy girl. the way this man carries himself is sooooo attractive. he’s insanely confident in everything he does. ugh i’m so in love idk what else to say. all of you need to meet him so we can all scream about him together🫡

❥ 𝓈𝒽𝒶𝓃𝓃𝑜𝓃 𝓁𝓎𝓃𝒸𝒽

⁀➷ god, he was just so beautiful, it was painful. everything about johnny kavanagh was pure perfection.

⁀➷ the sheer depth of my feelings for him was unhealthy. the adoration, the lust, the downright infatuation i had for him…it was insanity. i had never felt this much. i had never felt so consumed.

shannon like the river🥹🥹my sweet, precious girl. i would walk through hell and back for her. she’s the type of girl i’d be best friends with. if i could meet one fictional character, it would be her. her strength and resilience is like no other. it’s admirable…inspiring. to go through the things she went through and still keep pushing the way she does, aaaaa i’m getting emotional thinking about it. i would always see people saying that it was annoying how much the book mentioned shannon being super tiny which is completely understandable. but for me, it just made me even more sad. my poor baby🥺if anyone deserves the world, it’s definitely her and i can’t wait to see johnny give her that🥹

❥ 𝓇𝑜𝓂𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒:

╭──────༺♡༻──────╮
now playing:
look after you by the fray
1:34 ───|────── 4:27
↻ ◁ 𝕀𝕀 ▷ ↺
volume: ■■■■■□□□
╰──────༺♡༻──────╯

❝𝒉𝒊, 𝒋𝒐𝒉𝒏𝒏𝒚.❞
❝𝒉𝒊, 𝒔𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒐𝒏.❞
╰┈➤ i tabbed every time they said this🦋

shannonjohnny shannonjohnny shannonjohnny!!!! cut me and i’ll bleed them. to be loved is to be seen, to be known. they are and always will be the definition of that😭i promise you guys…i will never read a more precious love story than theirs. i feel their connection and love for one another so deeply it hurts. johnny’s acts of service!? god help me. the tension and the angst…i was fighting for my fucking life. if you’re not into slow burn romance, i really wouldn’t recommend this book, but i’m begging you to give it a try anyways😩because let me tell you…when they finally kiss, butterflies exploded in my stomach. had my stomach doing the thing😭🦋call me dramatic, but it was hotter than any smut i’ve ever read. i know i’ve focused on the romance a lot, especially with my updates while i was reading this book…but i promise you it’s so much more than a romance. so much more. the books are long for good reason so please, if the length is all that’s stopping you from picking it up…don’t even think about it bestie, i promise it’s worth it!🥹

❥ 𝓈𝒾𝒹𝑒 𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓇𝒶𝒸𝓉𝑒𝓇𝓈:
MWAH MWAH MWAH💋💋i better get books for all of them idc how long this series ends up being, it better happen😩

➸ joey lynch:
i fell in love with him after reading the first chapter of this book so imagine me reading his books. i’m not ready😭and i fear i’ll never be ready. his pov will ruin me in every way possible.

➸ aoife molloy:
joey’s precious girlfriend omg. she’s such a sweetheart and i can’t wait to learn more about her. aaaaa i’m gonna love her so much ik it🥺

➸ gerard gibson:
gibsie🥹when i tell you guys this man had me laughing until my stomach hurt. i was laughing so hard i couldn’t breathe at times. he really carried my happiness on his back so it didn’t get left behind😩easily one of my top favorite characters. i can’t wait to get to his book🤭

➸ claire biggs:
claire-bear😭i LOVEEE her. absolutely adore. her being all giddy about johnny and shannon…she’s literally ME. also her being such a good friend to shannon🥹such a sweetheart.

➸ hughie biggs:
claire’s brother who i wanna know more about🤭🤭i can’t remember his gf’s name, but aaaaa they better get a book! i’m already invested in characters i know almost nothing about😭

➸ patrick feely:
all i know is that he’s on the rugby team with johnny, hughie, and gibsie. i think he’s also hughie’s best friend, but all four of them are friends so feely’s book is a MUST. i want all the crumbs of every character in every single book. i need everyone’s pov so bad😩

➸ lizzie young:
another one of shannon’s besties hehe and she’s a grumpy girl so she better get her own book and it better be reverse grumpy sunshine. but i don’t like the guy she’s dating? idek if they’re dating but i don’t like him and i forgot his name LMAO.

❥ 𝒻𝑜𝓊𝓃𝒹 𝒻𝒶𝓂𝒾𝓁𝓎:
this trope in this series is going to be so good, it’s already so good. found family is one of my absolute favorites🤭i’ll eat it up every single time. i just want all these characters together all the time. johnny and gibsie’s friendship is the best thing ever. gibsie always calling shannon, “little shannon”, has me like🥹the friendship blossoming between joey, johnny, and gibsie. i can’t wait omg. joey calls gibsie, “gussie”, and gibsie calls joey, “lynchy”, I LOVE IT SM. claire, shannon, and lizzie hung out and watched one tree hill together. my favorite fucking show 😩i’m addicted to these characters and just want more. the books are so long, but i fear it still won’t be enough for me and that’s a terrifying thought. i can already feel the hangover🫠

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

❥ 𝓂𝑜𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝑒𝓂𝒷𝑒𝒹𝒹𝑒𝒹 𝒾𝓃𝓉𝑜 𝓂𝓎 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝒹:

”i need to talk to you,” i announced when i reached him.
”leave.”
nodding, i turned to leave, feeling thoroughly deflated, only to have a warm hand wrap around my wrist and pull me back to his side.
”not you,” johnny whispered in my ear, settling me in front of him. “them.” his blue-eyed gaze darted to the two older boys watching us with curious expressions, and in a tone that left no room for discussion, he said, “go.”
╰┈➤A MAN!!!!!! a man. that was hot.

”you’re beautiful,” he stated, causing my cheeks to flush a deep shade of pink.
a boy had never called me beautiful before. not like this. not with such forwardness. not with such sincerity.
he tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, and whispered, “inside and out.”
those extra words ruined me.
”i am?”
he nodded slowly. “everywhere.”
oh god. my heart.
╰┈➤i can’t. i’d fold so fast.

“give me your legs.”
“my wh-what?” i spluttered, breathing erratic.
“your legs. seems only fair since i’m taking up all the legroom.”
“you want me to put my legs on you?”
“i want you to be comfortable.”
“uh, okay?” blowing out a shaky breath, i gingerly shifted my legs onto his lap. “is that good for you?”
”yeah, shan.” offering me a smile, “you’re good for me.”
”huh?”
”it,” he corrected gruffly, and then roughly cleared his throat. “it’s good for me.”
╰┈➤had me screaming into my pillow😭

”hey, it’s little shannon,” gibsie chirped. “did johnny manage to coax you inside, or was it the smell of my fucking amazing cooking that drew you in?”
”you cooked one egg, gibs, under my supervision,” joey piped up. “you’re no darina allen.”
”thank fuck for that, lynchy. i like my man parts.”
╰┈➤I WAS CACKLING😂😂😂

”i’m going to hug you,” johnny whispered in my ear. ��tell me if that’s not okay.”
╰┈➤protect this man at all costs.

reaching up with one hand, johnny cupped my chin and used his free hand to gently sweep my hair off my neck.
then his fingers were tracing the bruises on my neck, his featherlight touch making my entire body tremble.
”someone touched you,” johnny whispered in my ear, placing his fingers on the marks. “i want to know who.”
the air escaped my lungs in an audible gasp. unable to stop myself, i sagged against his chest, eyes glued to our reflection in the mirror as he stared right back at me, blue eyes scorching holes in my soul.
”tell me who put their hands on you,” he coaxed as he stood behind me, my face in his hand and his fingers on my throat. “and i’ll make it better.”
╰┈➤the way this scene was so fucking heartbreaking, but so intimate at the same time and it has me wanting to walk straight into traffic!

i thought about that for a moment.
”do you mind?” i asked then.
he smirked. “no, baby, i don’t mind.”
my heart stopped in my chest.
╰┈➤I FUCKING SCREAMED. closed my book so quick and screamed. i wish y’all saw my reaction.

”who’s making you sad?” he asked me, voice sleepy. “tell me, baby.”
”johnny—“
”who’s hurting you, baby? i’ll fix it.”
╰┈➤HIM CALLING HER BABY IS MY UNDOING.

❥ 𝒻𝒶𝓋𝑜𝓇𝒾𝓉𝑒 𝓆𝓊𝑜𝓉𝑒𝓈:
➛ she looked right through all the bullshit. seeing me. seeing only me. and that made me want to move some shit around and place her slap-bang in the middle of my world.
➛ she had her arms wrapped protectively around herself, with her long brown hair drenched from the rain and sticking in wet clumps to her face. in my whole life, i’d never seen anything so beautiful.
➛ the minute my eyes landed on her, i knew i was in trouble.
➛ shannon lynch utterly disarmed me.
➛ ❝i reckon i can make those pretty cheeks of your turn pink.❞ *instantly blushes* guys, it’s true🤭

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

❥ 𝓅𝓁𝒶𝓎𝓁𝒾𝓈𝓉:
- iris by the goo goo dolls
- someone to you by banners
- can i be him by james arthur
- i like me better by lauv
- ever the same by rob thomas
╰┈➤ just let me hold you while you’re fallin’ apart. just let me hold you and we’ll both fall down. fall on me, tell me everything you want me to be. forever with you, forever in me, ever the same.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

❥ 𝒷𝑜𝓃𝓊𝓈 𝒸𝑜𝓃𝓉𝑒𝓃𝓉:
some of johnny’s thoughts that had me cheesing, squealing, blushing, fighting for my fucking life, etc.

you could love this girl your whole life, the crazy thought persisted inside my brain over and over, if you just let yourself.

straight to your house because i wanna fuck your sister, i thought to myself. i smirked at the fabulous notion, and then hunted the crazy thought away with a shake of my head.
probably love her, too, i mused to myself, a fucking lot.

”you would do that for me?”
i would pretty much do anything for you.

”um, yeah, sure—of course,” shannon mumbled, falling over her words in that adorable way she did when she was flustered.
don’t worry, baby, i thought to myself. i’m flustered too.

i’m forever undone. it should be illegal to be this attractive😩🦋

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

❥ 𝒻𝒾𝓃𝒶𝓁 𝓂𝑒𝓈𝓈𝒶𝑔𝑒:
this review is extremely long and i almost want to apologize, but i’m not going to. i love this book sm! i want to be able to look back on this review, reminisce, and relive my experience reading it for the first time🥺

❝boom, boom, fucking boom. i’m done for.❞

[lulu · Rating 1 out of 5]

worst $6 i have ever spent in my mf life. reading this book was the equivalent to ripping out each individual hair follicle on my head.

i actually can't believe i avoided every spoiler on this book like the mf plague thinking this series was gonna be a banger. all that hard work for nothing. wattpad, i'm so sorry for ever comparing this book to you. i've read books on wattpad a million times better than whatever the fuck i just read.

alright lets begin.

the length. the length of this book is enough to make me go dizzy. 626 pages in the copy i had, but other copies have over 800 pages. what is going on here? chloe walsh, may i introduce you to an editor perhaps? this book did not need to be as long as it was. and i genuinely thought since it was so long there would actually be shit happening in the book. i was mistaken. the book had absolutely nothing going on for about 99% of it, and that's me being generous.

chloe walsh must have thought she was saving the environment the way she recycled every single conversation and plot overnovernovernover again. basically just johnny driving shannon home every day and them having the same conversations. didn't realize he was signing up to be her chauffeur.

shannon
why in the fucking hell did i need to hear how small shannon like the river is every 5 seconds? there is absolutely no reason for me to be reading about how small she is the number of times i did. WE FUCKING GET IT. i was tired of it by the second page. yes, the second page. you read that correctly. it had already been mentioned at least 5 times by then. and then a million more times afterwards. shannon like the river and her tiny bone structure. she's so small and unable to do anything for herself. she needs literally anyone else to help her do the most basic human tasks.

the way this character is infantilized and then sexualized is disturbing. they constantly remind us of how tiny she is and how she acts like a child. she legitimately cannot do anything without needing help from someone else. you would think she would have some sort of development by the end of the book but she remains unchanged. her whole home life plot is explored so little you could literally forget its a factor. the book had more than enough pages to delve into that plot. but all we're supposed to care about is this girl's constant loop of a relationship with the popular rugby player. not the reason why she is literally emotionally and physically stunted. she acts like a child but we're told she's actually "mature" lol okay. and then they love to mention her body every 5 seconds and how hot johnny and other boys find her.

johnny
genuinely thought his name was josh the entire first half of the book. i hate this kid. all he did was talk about his dick for half the book, and how hot and tiny shannon like the river is and everything he wanted to do to her. being inside his head was the most painful experience of my life. the repetitive nonstop inner monologues really made me homicidal. pure torture it was putting myself through this. i could skip pages and still wind up back in the same spot.

he loved to create problems for him and shannon like the river out of thin air. one of the dumbest characters i've read about in a while. it was fun laughing at him sometimes though so at least there's that.

where was the love? the chemistry? the connection? there was over 600 pages and somehow nothing to convince me these two were made for each other. johnny needs to get his ass back to dublin and shannon like the river needs years of therapy and a stable household.

anyways see below the big josh and tiny shannon. how lovely!



joey
he barely was in this book but he is the only good thing in it. carried the book. there is no way i would enjoy any other book in this series, but this man is a gem. i will appreciate his character from afar but i truly do love him so much.

i brought the review back bc fuck the bullies yall can stay mad.

───

when the plan to br finally makes it out the dms 🤭 iqra lets hope we love it or hate it together <3

[mel ☽ · Rating 5 out of 5]

it’s been a long time since I’ve read a book where i don’t want it to end.

i was expecting this book to be the typical high school romance where jock meets shy girl and ya it kinda is but it’s definitely much more. i love books that focuses on the characters, friendships, relationships and family dynamics and this book has all of it. tbh, i wasn’t gonna read this book but the rating is so high and i was curious and all but i’m so glad i did.

ALSO, i wasn’t expecting this book to have a Mariana Zapata type of slow burn and i was all for it. and i know this book is long af but it’s like that because there’s more showing than telling and i loved this.

story & characters
this book is long af but it didn’t feel long. if books are like this, you know it’s really freakin good and it is.

what drew me in are the characters. the story is pretty simple: girl gets bullied in her old school, she transfers to a more preppy/private school, she meets the most popular guy who also happens to be a rugby prodigy, they fall in love slowly but they both hide it from each other cuz duh its forbidden and all that. you know the drill. but the characters? fucking great. they were so relatable, hilarious, and the banter? the best thing i’ve read in a long time.

the side characters, Gibsie (H bff) and Claire (h bff) are THE BEST. i don’t think i’ve ever laughed so hard, i feel nonexistent abs forming on my tummy until Gibsie is introduced in my book-life. and Claire? she’s the kind of friend every girl needs. both of these characters’ loyalty and support was so refreshing to read, i just love em and i ship both of these characters so bad too.

Shannon (h) & Johnny (H)
i felt so bad for Shannon that i just wanted to protect her from every single person who bullied and abused her. and knowing and reading about how she was being abused by her father? ughhhhh MY HEART. Shannon may seem weak, innocent, awkward, and naive (which is understandable after what she’s been through), but she’s actually so fucking strong, mature, the sweetest thing ever, and quite admirable tbh.

and omfg Johnny is the best hero i’ve read in a loooong time. he’s the perfect balance of sweet and alpha/protective/possessive type of hero. even though his pushing away from the heroine and implicitly leading her on frustrated me to no end, i’m still really glad that he was the one doing most of the chase. he may say to her he’s not interested but i mean, actions speak louder than words right?

im also so glad that Shannon calls Johnny out when he makes mistakes instead of just “giving in” just because, you know, he’s hot. ugh *cue eyeroll*. i’ve seen this trend in soo many NA books that it’s annoying as hell but thank god Shannon ain’t one of those weak and doormat/horny heroines.

drama
wellll most of the drama here is the push and pull from both MCs, it can get frustrating, not gonna lie, but it’s definitely worth it.

the OW drama here was kinda entertaining but also kinda not important? i don’t know it just feels like it’s there for the sake of drama or putting a wedge between the MCs and im honestly not complaining because i’ve been in the mood for petty teenage drama for quite a while.


anywaysss, this book doesn’t have sex in it and it focuses a lot more on the stages of slowly and innocently (but genuinely) falling in love with your soulmate so if you like that, i recommend this 100%.

[SK · Rating 5 out of 5]

"Boom, boom, fucking boom...
I'm done for."

Am honestly at a loss for words. I loved this book so much, it's definitely one of my favorites from now on. Y'all that ending was so heart breaking and yet I find myself being happy and loving that pain cause the book was THAT good. In no way it's a perfect book, it's flawed and the writing may not work for everyone, the pacing is slow but the characters and story are simply captivating.

In this character driven story, you'll find yourself rooting for them, understanding their pain and trauma, focusing on relationships, family dynamics and their growth as individuals.

✔️ Sports romance (rugby)
✔️ High School romance
✔️ Slow burn
✔️ Dual pov
✔️ Set in Ireland during the timeframe of 2005
✔️ Found family
✔️ "Who did this to you"

It's only after I bought the whole series that I found out it's a high school romance, it did make me skeptical yet it worked out brilliantly. I especially loved how the actual sport played an important part in the story. I absolutely LOVE watching rugby, so having the inclusion of that made it even a better experience for me.

Coming to the characters, Shannon and Johnny have my heart. These two are so adorable and so smitten by each other. I loved seeing them progress as strangers, to friends and eventually finally accepting their feelings for each other. The romance is so sweet and had me giggling.

🩷Shannon is one of those characters who deserve the whole freaking world. She's been through so much, I wish I could give her the biggest hug. I honestly don't understand how people can find her annoying. Poor girl is so vulnerable and to see her open her heart and start trusting Johnny was such a proud moment for me. I hate what's happening to her. I wish she would reach out and accept help, I simply wish someone would save her and her brothers 😭

🏉Johnny is a fun, dorky and such a loving character. I admire his dedication to rugby and how loyal his teammates are to him, and he to them. His persona instantly puts people at ease and also the guy is straightforward- me likey. But to see him put himself through so much pain to achieve his goals was heartbreaking. I found myself relating to some of his struggles as I have been going through the same, so he does have a soft spot in my heart. I loved the scene in the hospital when he was high tbh, it was funny and so honest from him lol.

The side characters are equally impactful and so easy to like. Joey is someone am really rooting for. I want to see him happy so bad it breaks my heart. I want to get to know Aoife more, she seems so sweet. Claire and Gibsie? Oh gosh, I ship it so hard 😩😩 I love Gibsie, he's so loyal and the sense of humor is elite lol. Lizzy seems upfront and seems to be hiding her own struggles but that's all I know about her. Shannon's parents and Bella can die, if I start ranting about how much I hate them this review will never end.

The ending broke me as it ends on a sad and brutal note. I was expecting it to happen yet it hurt so bad. I have so much hope for the next book, hopefully will love it the same if not more.

Highly recommended.
Please check trigger warnings before reading this book.

~•~•~
Am so intimidated by the size of this book but IT'S TIMEEEEEE

[Marianna Moore · Rating 5 out of 5]

REREAD A MILLION STARSSSSSSSSS OF SHEER PAIN AND AGONY!!

Somehow this was even more painful the second time around. These characters are my family they are everything to me like I quite literally don’t know how else to explain how these books make me feel other than it feels like home.

Johnny and Shannon have my whole heart. Their love is like nothing else and I will read their story over and over again and never get tired of it. I never want this to end. This series is the reason why I have such high standards, truly every contemporary romance is just so mid in comparison gahhhhhh!!!


Money and Aoife are still my number 1s but Johnny and Shannon literally own a piece of my soul as well god I love them all. My heart is in shambles.

———————————————————————————

♾️ STARS!!
Oh my GOODNESS I AM A MESS! Uhm hi hello, yes this book is absolutely worth all the hype it gets and will be permanently engrained in my brain for the rest of eternity.


Johnny and Shannon like the river. They officially have my whole entire heart and soul. The way Johnny speaks about Shannon pulls at my heart every single time I just love him so so much. Their love for each other breaks my heart but also makes it so dang full. My heart quite literally broke in half so many times during this book I was so unprepared to be this invested in a high school sports romance… but now I don’t know how I’m going to live knowing I Shannon and Johnny’s story will end.

The found family in this book has me so emotionally attached to each and every character I could not get enough of them! I was cracking up, crying, smiling, kicking my feet, ahhhh I loved this so much!

Yes, read it, now.

[chloe · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF @ pg 231.
i went into this book hoping for a fun time and not take it too seriously but it was just horrendous.
there were like two cute moments but other than that the writing was bad, i was not invested and there were some lines that made me gasp out loud because of how gross they are (e.g. ableist, transphobic, misogynistic) e.g.:

- the main character says how her eyes are "too big" for her face so she tries to squint. "the squinting only made me look disabled" ??????? this was on page one so i should have KNOWN not to trust it would get any better

- "a girl, a fucking female"

- the main guy johnny to one of his guy friends: "i hurt your feelings? who's the bitch with a vagina now?"

anyway, save yourselves & don't read this book 😅

[Larissa Cambusano · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 MILLLIONNNNN STARS⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ i’m beyond obsessed. no review could do this book justice but wow. i’m SPRINTING to keeping 13!!!!!

[jules · Rating 1 out of 5]

no way y'all like this.....

[Rachel Catherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

(4.25 ⭐️) Hi Johnny. Hi Shannon. 🥹

[Alexa Raye · Rating 5 out of 5]

“now tell me who made you cry & i’ll fix it”

i don’t think i’ll ever recover from this story. johnny is officially my favorite ❤️‍🩹

[౨ৎ · Rating 1 out of 5]

i could make a drinking game of how many times
a) shannon's called tiny
b) johnny talks abt his dick

but i'd die of alcohol poisoning

[Emmy Rosam · Rating 5 out of 5]

For keeps ❤️‍🩹

[Clace · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.05!!

“Boom, boom, fucking boom,”

JOHNNY KAVANAGH FANS LOOK AWAY!!

The first 200 pages of this book were absolutely horrendous, atrocious, the worst 200 pages that I have ever read in my life. I was so bleckh'd out by the fact that shannon was 15 and the amount of dick talks and dick mentions in Johnny's chapter was so infuriating like every fucking second you'd look at the book and it would Johnny and his dick being described LIKE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE STOP MENTIONING HIS POGO STICK+ the actual meaning of binding 13 💀💀. However, the remaining 600 pages were so much better, such a massive improvement, it captivated me and I enjoyed it soo much and the fact that I read it fast. I was topping because my house was getting fumigated so had to look at that and the moving took a lot of my time but this never let me let go of its grip. I would say I loved Shannons story and it gripped so much more than Johnny's, his was ok, I preferred reading about Shannon more. Her chapters were the redeeming part in my opinion.

“¨I think I need you for keeps.¨
¨I think I need you for keeps, too.¨”

Johnny Kavanagh, He was such an asshole. I loved him when he was Shannon but when he was not? I hated him. He was a manwhore with the way he passed on from one woman to another but that was before Shannon and we didnt get enough page time so it did not bother me, what bothered me was the fact that he treated his friends like they were trash, threatening them, snapping at them. I remember hughie asking if he wanted lunch and Johnny was talking to shannon and instead of politely declining 'Fuck off' He snapped like come on man! and the way he treated Gibsie and all, I would never treat my friends like that, besides that I dont understand why he would punch the boyfriends of the girls who bullied Shannon when it wasn't even their fault like?? they dont control them?? and what would he do if that girl didnt have a bf? anyways, to the bfs who bullied shannon it was understandable but Cormac? did they not smooth things over? yes, they did but he still punched her for the doings of Bella even tho Cormac had nothing to do with it. What an asshole. Also, I love Joey and he was a bitch to him so -1 point for that. However his scenes with Shannon made me like him a lot, I love how considerate he was of her and how her life got better because of him and how much effort he put in for her.

Shannon Lynch, My heart broke for her. I did not care for anyone besides her and Joey. I loved her story so much and ugh I hated what she went through if only I could give her a big hug and take all of her siblings with her to somewhere safe because I cannot imagine spending your childhood like that, so full of horror and trauma. it wasn't just her house but her school, her community. I was so pissed!! I could see her frustration, her anger and her resolve, her breakdown. It was actually heartbreaking to see what she went through but her story was so engaging and loved how her story was so easily redeemable.

Joey, Aoife, Bella, Mam and Da, its a disgrace to put Joey and Aoife with them but I had to because I love them and I cant wait to read their story, Bella, Ma and Da can rot in hell.

“I carefully scrolled through his playlists and almost had a heart attack when my eyes landed on the one named Songs for Shannon.”

The romance was actually so sweet. I loved the slow burn and it was actually nice to see that they weren't in each others throats every two minutes. I enjoyed the sweet moments we got between them, Johnny really did care for her and gave her everything, I would like to see how their romance progresses in the next book considering the events of the end and how Johnny doesn't know but it was refreshing to see how it unraveled through this book.

Overall, a solid novel!! (I didnt cry Hoda, gimme 100 dollars pls)
___
Hoda and Rowan have been dying for me to read this and this also won my poll + i heard its like shameless so I am very excited to read Johnny and Shannon's story!

[Ri ♡ · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 ‘boom boom fucking boom’ stars

“I think I need you for keeps,” he slurred.
“I think I need you for keeps, too,” I confessed.

This book did something like boom boom fucking boom to my heart. I absolutely, wholeheartedly, deeply, madly and truly love Johnny and Shannon. There's this saying that you don't find a book but a book finds it way to you and it's so true because I have been ignoring this series for over a year but this year I finally caved in and guess who's obsessed? ME! I was just 10 chapters in the story and I already knew I was going to give it 5 stars.

He smiled down at me. “Hi, Shannon.”
“Hi, Johnny,” I whispered, staring back at him, feeling like my heart was two seconds away from bursting out of my chest.

I was a bit scared to read this because I rarely read high school romances where teenagers behave like a bunch of rich kids who thinks they are the king of the world. But this book was so realistic in terms of high school trope and I loved how Chloe actually didn't wrote her characters as some rich assholes who are too good for the world. All the characters were teenagers going through that crazy and young phase but they were written in such a real and realistic way. Yes, there were some cringy and cliché moments but they are teenagers so it was absolutely understandable.

“She was nice to think about. She was fucking beautiful. Her voice. Her hair. Her smell. The way she spoke. Every single part of her.”

The plot is more of character-driven and the pacing was slow but I definitely don't mind it because I never wanted to end this book. Chloe can write ten books about Johnny and Shannon doing dumb ass shit and I would still read them with hearts in my eyes. I loved the writing because it was easy to read and captivating and it worked well for me because it's a 500 plus pages book. This might be not everyone's writing style because there was no flowery euphemisms or allegories. I love how the story was not just focused on the romance part. The character's development was slow but done so well and there's still a lot to unpack in Keeping 13 but I love it because healing is not a linear and I would love if there is a real growth to Shannon and Johnny's character. I also loved the found family trope in this one.

“Look at me,” he repeated, tone calm and coaxing. I couldn’t. I felt him shift beside me and then his fingers were on my chin, tipping my face up to his. “You’re safe,” he whispered, cupping my cheek in his hand, eyes boring holes straight through my soul. “I promise.”

This book is the slowest slow-burn I have ever read in my life and I didn't hated a bit even though I was dying for them to kiss each other and when that happened I was literally dead because they are so adorable. The way they met for the first time was so funny and adorable and I immediately knew right then that they are going to be my new obsession and my new comfort couple. I have never felt this many butterflies in my stomach while reading a book about two teenage people who are madly in love with each other but refuse to accept their feelings.

“Well, thanks for caring,” I breathed.
“Thanks for being worth it,” Johnny replied, hand still on my cheek.

➸ Shannon Lynch

The girl with sad eyes. The moment I saw her I had this immediate need to protect her from the world. Her story broke my heart 🥺 She deserves the best in the world. Shannon's is such a vulnerable and fragile girl with the biggest and the kindest heart in the world. She's the quiet one with the traumatic childhood and school experience who just wanted a clean slate at a new school. I hate how people treated her at her old school and I'm glad Johnny beat the shit out of them for calling her out by names. She's used to being alone, has trust issues, build a huge wall around herself to protect her, never had anyone by her side except her brother Joey. She's been dealing through a shit life and has no self-confidence and self-esteem because people treated her like shit all her life. I hate it when the authors or the mmc can't shut up about how the fmc is so small and short and tiny and Chloe did exactly the same but I think it was done to portrayed her character as vulnerable or fragile girl and to make readers empathise with her. She has a lot to heal and move on from in her life but she's doing it all her pace with Johnny and her loved ones by her side.

“For once in my life, I wanted a safe place to run to instead of from. I felt like I was slowly dying in that house. In my home. Where I was supposed to lay my head. Where I was supposed to feel safe.”

➸ Johnny Kavanagh

HE IS THE DEFINITION OF BOY OBSESSED AND WHO DID THAT TO YOU TROPE. He's broody and a bit grumpy with all that "Rugby is my life" attitude but he's so thoughtful, respectful, caring, and just incredible. He has DIMPLES AND HE LOVES DOGS? HE'S PERFECT! I hate it when man picks fight for their woman like she can't do that herself but Johnny is an exception. I'd let him slay all my dragons if he wants to. He did that with Shannon, fought on her behalf, threatened the kids at his school to not talk shit about her and it's not because he's strong and all, it was because he wanted and needed to protect her and he wanted her to protect him in some way. His povs were everything! He's a very strong minded person with a very obsessive personality. No matter how perfect he appears to all the other people, Johnny is such a scared boy with dreams and hopes. He has his own demons and fears that can destroy his career and I get it why he tried to hide his injury from everyone because no body wants to see how you can lose everything you have worked for your whole life destroy right in front of your eyes.

“Problem was, every time she ran, I found myself chasing right after her, desperate to just be with her.”

╰┈➤ Shannon & Johnny

Right person, Right time.

They make my heart go like WOAH. They are complete opposites of each other in terms of status, personality and upbringing. He wants to save her and she wants to hide from her past and everything. She's a damaged soul but he's determined to save her and love her. They had me swooning and giggling at Every. Damn. Moment. The giddiness I felt when they were in formed proximity and when Johnny was driving her to home and everytime he threatened the kids at school to stay away from “My Shannon” (don't love it when they lay claims on woman but it's Johnny so he can do anything to me). He had a playlist of songs that reminded him of her and they were all love songs and he spent thirty minutes in rain trying to find her shoe and you are telling me he is fictional 😭 He tried to find ways to spend time with her because his heart didn't wanted to let go of her.

“Someone touched you,” Johnny whispered in my ear, placing his fingers on the marks. “I want to know who.”

“Now,” I sneered, glaring down at their faces. “Who wants to call my girlfriend a whore to my face?”

“Give me a name,” Johnny growled, dropping his hands to his hips. “And I’ll take care of it.”
“What— no! I’m grand,” I quickly replied. “I have allergies.”
“Me too. To assholes and bullshit,” Johnny snarled.
“Now, tell me who made you cry and I’ll fix it.”

The feminist in me is dead after meeting Johnny Kavanagh🤸🏽‍♀️


He wanted to be her friend but also couldn't be her friend and all the dilemma, confusions, denials and bulldozing (Iykyk) worked so well in the end. I love that they just didn't had this lust and tension between them but they also had an emotional and intimate connection. They understood each other so well and helped each other in their own way. They had this easy going relationship and friendship. The way Johnny made everything easy for Shannon at school, the way he protected her, loved her, took care of her everytime, and the way Shannon saw the real Johnny behind Johnny the perfect boy and the perfect rugby player. Johnny was so patient with her and waited for her to open up to him about her abusive life. How he was afraid of talking to her about his insecurities and fears yet he tried his best with her. They are just so so prefect for each other. Definitely soulmates!

“Shannon.” Johnny’s hand snaked out and wrapped around my wrist. “I don’t want you to go,” he said gruffly, tugging me back down beside him. “I want you here.” He rested a hand on the bed right behind my back and leaned close. “I want you to stay with me.”

— Side Characters —

➸ Joey: Perfect brother and I already love him. Can't wait to read his book but I already know his book is going to break my heart in pieces.

➸ Aoife: She's so precious and I love the way she's always there for Joey and his family.

➸ Claire: Love love love her. She's the best with her kind-hearted spirit and sweet nature. She's the type of friend who would hype you up all the damn time.

➸ Gibsie: He was a bit annoying in the start but his character grew on me a lot. His friendship with Johnny is so precious. I can't wait for his book. Claire and Gibsie literally behaved like a married couple in this book. He follows her, cracks weird jokes and Claire retorts with her witty replies.

➸ Lizzie: The ice queen of their group. A bit annoying but I love whoever loves Shannon.


The hospital scene at the end is my roman empire and it was so adorable, so cute, so comforting. Just everything.

“I’m keeping her, Da.”
“Okay, son,” he coaxed. “You keep the girl.” “She makes my heart go, like, whoa.”
“Is that right?” he mused.
“So bad, Da.” I sighed. “Boom, boom, fucking boom.” I shook my head. “All the time.”

The ending broke my heart because Shannon didn't deserve that 😭, but I'm hoping for a better life for her in Keeping 13.

“If this is love, then it’s you,” he replied, dragging me down to lie beside him.
“You are love.” He sighed contently. “Stay with me.” Always.
“I’ll stay with you,” I whispered, feeling more in this moment than I could handle.

💌 This is not just a story about a girl who was mentally and physically abused by her father and her classmates. It's not just about romance or friendships. It's about how to let someone in your life and how to develop your trust again and how to fall in love while also figuring out your fears and insecurities. It's about letting yourself move on from the life of difficulties and pain and trauma. It's about finding comfort, a home, a sense of security and love in other people. It's also about dreams and how to overcome your fear of losing them. It's about healing. It's just about life ❤️‍🩹

➙ Second read: April 2025 — 5 stars
➙ First read: January 2024 — 5 stars

——————————

Definitely worth all the damn hype in this world! I AM SO OBSESSED WITH JOHNNYSHANNON 😭 AND I WANT MORE. RTC!!

——————————
let's see what all the hype is about 🤸🏽‍♀️

[Val ⚓️ Shameless Handmaiden ⚓️ · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was so, so good...

Excellent character building.
Excellent relationship building.
Just excellent all around.

I loved the Ireland backdrop and the prep school setting, not to mention all of the hard-hitting topics. I would gush more, but am short on time here.

I am also dying for the second book and pissed that I have to work 12+ hour days the next three days and will have no time to read it until Saturday. I don't know why I haven't read this author before, but am now adding her entire back-list to my tbr.

[Ashley (semi-ia, exam szn) · Rating 1 out of 5]

i have a bigger dick than johnny kavanagh!!

good LORD, this was harrowingly arduous. 600 PAGES FOR WHAT?? I REFUSE TO ASSOCIATE THIS BOOK WITH SHE WILL BE LOVED.

if you have seen some of my other reviews, i am, evidently, a firm believer that a romance book absolutely should NOT surpass 400 pages. shall there be more, it better be altering my brain chemistry. thus, for a romance book containing 600 pages, i should be feeling everything profoundly in my bones—yearning, sorrow, anger, angst, giddiness, and everything else in between. and instead, i read this with the emotional investment of someone reading a shampoo bottle and the overwhelming urge to grimace and self-euthanize. did i have a feeling that i would loathe this and want to choke myself? yes. yet, i also had this minuscule sliver of hope that there might be at least a few parts that would charm me or that i find enjoyable. also, i have fomo. undoubtedly, that is my fatal flaw.

TW: unpopular opinion

i am aware of the substantial faction of diehard fans of this book wherein some have a shrine dedicated to johnny kavanagh in their closet. if you are one of them, i’d highly recommend that you click off this review, as there is a rating filter for a reason.

reading this felt like being trapped in a roundabout with no exit. for me, every scene with johnny and shannon bled into the next— indistinguishable, repetitive, and somehow simultaneously over-the-top and emotionally flat. by the end, i already had forgotten 80% of what happened. the writing didn’t help at all. i WILL go livid and jump off a bridge if i read the words “midnight blue eyes” “like the river” “for keeps” or yet another report on how massive johnny is and how rock-solid his chest feels again. it had nothing else going for it, so yes, i’m being overly picky about the prose and choice of repetitive words. sue me. and it’s an insult to other irish authors, frankly. i need to read some claire keegan or sally rooney now.

anyway, this did not feel like a slow burn. it felt like the same, shallow conversation was copied and pasted into eternity with slightly different trauma flashbacks. MY KINGDOM FOR AN EDITOR!! i could ghostwrite 50% of johnny’s inner monologue right now:
“hi johnny”
“hi shannon”
holy shite, she’s so beautiful, i could get lost in those midnight blue eyes forever. i want to make her blush, to see her smile all the time, to take her home with me.
“how are you?”
“grand”
i’m such an eejit. why am i always longing to talk to her? she’s so young and i should be focusing on rugby.
and then they get into his car, or go to his house, or have the same recycled fuckass conversation in a hallway, on the field, or whatever. i don’t care enough to remember.

and their dynamic was baffling. it is genuinely beyond me how they love each other. one second they’re awkwardly talking, then trauma bonding, which i assume is why they find each other different than the others. and then johnny is all “ugh, i can’t do this, i have to focus on rugby, why am i so obsessed with her?” then radio silence. and then, out of nowhere, we’re at “i love you”. WHAT?? i’m sorry. you love her because… why? because she’s small and traumatized, unlike any other girl you have met? because she, quote, “didn’t look old enough to attend secondary school”? johnny. you are not beating the groomer allegations. presumably, shannon is in love with him because he’s the only guy who has ever given her romantic attention and helped her out rather than joey. but i think she should’ve just gotten with her friend claire instead!! i guess the popular manwhore who is an asshole who instantaneously changes because the fmc is “way different than the other girls” x the shy, fragile girl will never do it for me.

you will NEVER catch me saying johnny kavanagh is an amiable book boyfriend. OVERRATED. I REBUKE!! DO NOT COME TO MY TOWN. all i felt for him was an ambivalence of hate and indifference. this guy really had no discernable character traits other than being a concerningly overprotective and possessive (when they were nowhere close to dating), conceited asshole who expects everyone to bow at his feet and never ceases talking about himself, rugby, sex, girls bodies (there was also a chapter about him watching porn, was that really necessary?), and shannon. his chapters didn’t endear him to me—they just reminded me why i hate teenage boys. he insisted on driving her home constantly and found every opportunity to seek her out and attach himself to her hip, despite barely knowing her. he was always condemning other guys for being horny, weird creeps, but sir—the call is coming from inside the house??

"She was nothing like the girls I usually
fucked around with.
I liked curves.
I loved tits.
And I was a sucker for a big ass.
She had none of the above.
But she had legs.
And hair.
And a smile.
And those fucking midnight blue eyes" congrats! you're emotionally mature now because you noticed her eye colour and still like her despite her lack of tits. groundbreaking.

"That was two weeks ago and I still
hadn't touched my dick.
I was traumatized.
I was a broken man." OKAY, SHUT UP AND FIND A HOBBY.

"I hurt your feelings?" I cocked a brow.
"Who's the bitch with a vagina now?"
"Apologize," he ordered.
"Get the fuck out of here, ya eejit," I
laughed. someone shut this hoe up and buy him a dictionary and a muzzle.

"No bother," Joey replied. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to his girlfriend's lips before fastening his seatbelt. "Where are we heading?"
Straight to your house because I wanna fuck your sister, I thought to myself, smirked at the fabulous notion, and then hunted the crazy thought away with a shake of my head.
Probably love her, too, I mused to myself, a fucking lot, before pushing that madness out as well. fabulous notion where? LEAVE THE POOR GIRL ALONE.

Without another word, Joey turned around and walked away, leaving me standing in the doorway, staring after him with only two things on my mind.
The first: finding an icepack for my
balls.
The second: fantasizing about all the terribly inappropriate things I longed to do with his sister.
NO ONE WOULD LET ANY OF THIS SLIDE IF HE WERE UGLY. argue with the wall.

none of the side characters stood out to me. claire and lizzie are alright. however, everyone is constantly raving about how hilarious and loveable gibsie is, but i thought he was just there. I’M SORRY. though, i will say he was too much of a good friend to johnny. he let a pedophile suck his dick so he could get a file about shannon’s educational history because johnny was so fixated on finding out. johnny does not deserve that loyalty.

as for shannon “like the river”, i did want to get her out of that vile household and stab her father—but i struggled to connect with her. i feel like her character was written entirely around her trauma and her fixation on johnny’s overwhelming masculinity. i desperately wanted to see and feel her exist more outside of that—more of her wants, thoughts, to choose something for herself that wasn’t just johnny.

ultimately, i agree with ren. i love a good book written by an irish author, but not this one. people keep saying that it gets better, and i am a delusional fool, so i shall continue. BUT THIS BOOK DESERVES JAIL!!

-

somewhere between 1 and 2 stars, people at the bookstore saw me celebrate finishing this.

i have a bigger dick than johnny kavanagh!!

also i wholeheartedly agree with ren

bigger review to come.

-
pati i'm scared.
-
did i tell a lot of people that i would never read this series? yes. but guys. pati made me add this to my tbr. I NEED HER TO READ MADONNA IN A FUR COATTT. also the og cover is FUGLY

[Mareeva · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.2 stars

The deal is.....

The main couple was cute, the secondary characters were even better, many scenes were downright hilarious and many inexplicably sad, the writing was easy to follow and it was without a doubt one of the best high school romances I’ve ever read.

But then we have info dumpy monologues, really long chapters, an even longer page count, unnecessary scenes that bored me to death, a bunch of convenient crashing into male chests, a heroine that unintentionally got on my nerves, zero character development, only one proper bloody kiss scene in an 887 page book and a love story that’s actually pretty average.

There....I said it, bring out the pitchforks.

PS; that hospital scene at the end? Yeaaa you know which one I’m talking about. That was possibly the funniest, cutest, most wholesome and my favourite fucking book scene ever.

PS PS; who thought that cover was a good idea?

[Samantha Schwerin · Rating 1 out of 5]

This is THE most FRUSTRATING book I have read this year.

-The plot goes round and round in circles, repeating itself every other chapter. For example: plot happens in chapter 3...chapters 4 and 5 revolve around Shannon and Johnny relaying said plot in chapter 3 to their friends. NOTHING HAPPENS. It's like 1 step forward and two steps in place. I can literally skip entire chapters and still get the gist of what happens. By like the 40% point, the two main characters have had hardly any interaction- but I know all of the antics of their friends really well! Gibsie is hilarious! Lizzie is a drag. That Rowen character sucks. Gibsie and Claire sooo belong together and are blind to it (I sense the build up to their own book)...etc. The book mostly revolves around Shannon's shitty home life and school life, Johnny's sports and their friends. Which is all fine...except its more about all of those things than a romance. And it doesn't help that so much of the plot is repeated every other chapter.

-There is slow burn romance....and then there is so slow, they literally go backwards- romance. The main characters have maybe 5/6 worthwhile scenes together and I am at the 72% mark. They talk the day Johnny hit Shannon in the head with a ball, they talk maybe once at lunch, they talk when she is forced to go over to his house twice, they have one meaningful conversation in his car and they go to a pub together. But most of their conversations revolve around him trying to figure out what the marks on her body are from, and kicking the asses of those who threaten her. They have kissed once (one sided mind you), talked a handful of times, yet they both feel like they are in love with the other. HOW?

-I get Shannon is a wounded bird- but MAN her actions are frustrating to read. She's just SO meek and the ultimate damsel that needs saving. Everything bad that could happen to her, happens to her. It's just a lot. And I get that she has had a hard life, but sometimes I just really wanted her to stand up and become a strong person despite all of that.

-Although I am giving this a one star out of pure frustration with the plot-I do have to say that the dialogue is this book is fantastic and it is pretty well written in general.

[anh · Rating 1 out of 5]

⚠️TW: If you love this book or this series, I strongly recommend you DO NOT read this review.

Do yourself a favour and turn back now—because what follows is not just critical, it is scathing, explosive, and unfiltered. I have been holding this in for far too long, and it’s about to come pouring out with no mercy. I need to say every single word, because I dedicated so many hours of my life trudging through this book like it was some literary crucifixion and now I need to exorcise it from my system.

Let me start at the beginning. This book has been sitting and collecting dust on my shelf for almost 2 years. I had it perched like a ticking time bomb, staring at me like some cursed relic I was too scared to touch. And why? Because the hype was absolutely deafening. Everyone swore it was a life-ruining, soul-crushing masterpiece.

“It’s long, but every word counts.”

“800 pages isn’t even enough.”

“It’s slow burn done right.”

Well you all are LIARS!! Please be so for real right now.

Because this book didn’t ruin me. It didn’t touch me. It didn’t even graze the surface of an emotional reaction. What it did was waste my time, insult my intelligence, and test the limits of my patience in a way no book has ever dared to do before. I am in awe of the sheer audacity. If you cut 500 pages from this book, I promise you—not a single ounce of substance would be lost. It would be the exact same story, only slightly less torturous to endure.

I did not walk into this book completely blind. I went in already prepared to be annoyed by Johnny's chronic inability to think with anything other than his dick and talk about his dick and the way Shannon like the river is endlessly described as small, tiny, delicate, fragile like that was her entire identity. I knew these things going in and still they managed to exhaust me more than I imagined. It’s not just annoying. It’s grotesque in its repetition and utterly devoid of nuance. And yet somehow… that wasn’t even the worst part.

To everyone who told me I would love this, just know I am currently side-eyeing you all so hard.

Because I expected emotional devastation and heartbreak. I expected some kind of unforgettable, gut-wrenching character-driven masterpiece.

Instead, I got Binding 13—an 800+ page exercise in stagnation, indulgent repetition, and emotional shallowness disguised as depth.

I kept waiting for the moment. You know the one—the point where it all clicks, where all the buildup pays off, where it finally reaches in and grabs something visceral inside you. But it never came. Not once!! I felt absolutely NOTHING for these characters or their struggles just dead, dry-eyed silence, night after night as I dragged myself through yet another chapter that read like a copy-pasted version of the one before it.

This book is not slow burn. It is narrative paralysis. The same scenes repeat in an endless, mind-numbing loop: Shannon flinches, Johnny rages, someone bullies Shannon, Johnny thinks about how much he wants her but can’t have her, Shannon gets bruised again, someone calls her fragile, repeat. There is no escalation. No evolution. No rising tension. It’s the same emotional beats recycled again and again with zero payoff and even less purpose. Entire chapters go by where literally nothing happens just endless brooding and manufactured angst with no direction.

And the writing? In love with its own melodrama. The dialogue is so stiff, robotic, and comically unnatural. I swear no one speaks like a real human being. Every conversation is either an info dump of exaggerated feelings or a theatrical shouting match devoid of subtlety, nuance, or rhythm. It’s emotionally loud but narratively hollow. The characters talk at each other, not to each other, and it makes every scene feel like a teen soap opera.

Shannon- She is supposed to be the emotional core of the novel—the girl whose trauma and healing we’re meant to follow, to feel, to ache for. And yet she barely exists as a person. She is written like a fragile porcelain doll- passive, helpless, flinching her way through the narrative with no agency and no emotional complexity. Every chapter reduces her to a list of adjectives: small, broken, tiny, scared. That’s it!! That’s all she is. Over 800 pages, we do not see her evolve, reflect, or assert herself in any meaningful way. She just gasps, freezes then gets rescued. That is her ENTIRE character arc.

And yes, I know she’s 15. I am not demanding a miraculous transformation or unrealistic maturity. But when you dedicate this much space to a character’s trauma, it is deeply insulting and irresponsible to offer no inner reckoning and no progress whatsoever. There is no psychological insight or exploration of her healing just a parade of bruises and tears presented as “sadness.” That’s not trauma representation. That’s emotional voyeurism.

Johnny - I have never read so many pages dedicated to a character doing absolutely nothing. I wanted to sympathise with him. And, yes—I do feel sorry for him in regard to his injury. His entire internal monologue consists of three settings: horny, angry, and guilty. That’s it. His guilt over being attracted to a 15-year-old when he’s 17 is absurdly overblown—he spirals like he’s committed a crime against humanity, when in reality it’s a two-year age gap and the way his “conflict” is drawn out feels like nothing more than forced, artificial angst designed to pad the word count and create false tension.

And what does he do with this guilt? Does he talk to Shannon? NO. He just broods, punches things (and people), and makes decisions for her instead of with her. He projects his own fears and desires onto her and treats her like a delicate possession that he must guard with violence. It is not romantic at all it is unhealthy codependency masquerading as “protectiveness,” and the book never once questions it.

Even the so-called romantic moments fall completely flat. The “romance” reads like a boy’s fantasy about saving a broken girl, not a mutual connection based on shared vulnerability or trust. It feels empty and rushed yet we’re expected to swoon like this is some grand, timeless love story.

The rest of the side characters are a blur of testosterone and noise. Every boy sounds the same with how loud and horny they are. The supposed “found family” dynamic is so shallow and unearned that I actually forgot it was supposed to exist until the book reminded me. I wanted to care. I tried to care. But the book gives us nothing to connect with, nothing to invest in. It expects emotional loyalty without doing the work to earn it.

The only flicker of potential comes from Joey and Aoife. And even that barely survives the weight of this suffocating narrative. They are the sole reason I’m even considering continuing this series because against all odds, they do feel like characters with texture and tension. But let’s be real, they are nowhere near enough to justify what I just endured.

The worst part? This book has the audacity to present itself as a raw, vulnerable story about pain and survival yet there is no exploration of it at all. Shannon’s abuse is never lived through on the page it’s just a dramatic prop used to generate pity and tension. Her recovery is not depicted, and her voice is never fully heard. It’s a shallow aestheticisation of trauma only used to manipulate. And that, more than anything else, makes me furious. Because trauma deserves respect. It deserves to be written with emotional intelligence and integrity not reduced to a backdrop for brooding boys and romantic fantasy.


Look, call me a heartless bitch or whatever but I went into this book ready to feel everything but instead I was just emotionally starved.

I shouldn’t even be continuing the series. I know that. Every rational part of me is telling me to quit. But I am unhinged and stubborn and tragically hopeful that maybe it gets better. That maybe this mess of wasted potential and hollow angst turns into something real in the later books.

If you loved this book, that is completely valid. Genuinely. I don’t mean this as a personal attack. I’m not here to fight anyone over what they love. But for me? Binding 13 was one of the biggest literary disappointments I’ve ever experienced. A repetitive, emotionally dishonest, painfully overwritten mess that left me empty, exhausted, and wondering what the hell I just read.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to reread Normal People to restore my faith in Irish literature.

___________________
rejoiced so loudly after finishing this
rtc
__________________
ready to squint for 800 pages 😍

[maria · Rating 4 out of 5]

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ 4 ✰

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹”I think I need you for keeps”

”I think I need you for keeps, too” ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹

I was hesitant to start this series because it’s incredibly hyped on BookTok, and I tend to avoid those books like the plague. However, I decided there must be a reason why so many readers absolutely love it, so I gave it a shot.

I don’t really know what rating to give this book so I’m going to settle on a 4 stars for now just because I’m reading keeping 13 and im hating it.🤪

First of all, one thing I always hear people complain about is how repetitive the mentions of Shannon being small and tiny are, but I actually found the focus on Johnny’s size to be even MORE excessive. Almost every page describes him as tall, huge, muscular, or so big that his shirt is practically bursting at the seams. These descriptions came from nearly every character and at every turn. And with Shannon’s mention of her size seemed more internal, something she thought about herself, (sometimes it was Johnny mentioning too) so it didn’t bother me as much. However, I did get tired of hearing about how “monstrous” Johnny was.

The story is very character driven which I think worked really well for this book, it makes you feel more connected to the characters and makes you feel part of the story, People told me it would be an emotional read, but to be honest, I didn’t shed a single tear. Maybe that’s just me, but I expected to feel more. Boo for that 👎🏻

Now, I have to admit that the book was interesting enough to keep me entertained to the point that every time I had to leave my house to be a human being and socialize I was only thinking about Shannon and what was happening in her life.

If you haven’t picked up this series yet, I’d say it’s worth giving a try. The length of the series might seem intimidating, but this book flew by—300 pages felt like reading just 100. As for the Irish glossary, it might seem daunting, but I didn’t find it too difficult to follow. It’s definitely manageable at least it was for me.


➳ characters:

ೃ࿐ Shannon

⭑.ᐟ “I was annoyed with myself for being the kind of person who cried when angry I wanted to be a shouter. A shouter was much better than a crier.”

I love her so much🥹 my sweet baby, she’s just the cutest and strongest girl. I feel so sad about her and what she is going through, I can understand why some people hate her and calls her a pick-me but imo she is just awkward with a good reason to be like that, I can’t imagine how it would feel living with that trauma. I just wanted to give her a big hug 🫂


ೃ࿐ Johnny

He needs to go to therapy and control his anger issues immediately.

I’m actually scared to say this because I feel like one hardcore fan of the series is going to find my address and kill me in my sleep but I don’t get the hype with Johnny, I don’t understand how every video I see they say that Johnny is the best character in the series, best book boyfriend ever yada yada. I’m not saying that he’s bad but he’s just okay, nothing out of this world.

To be honest I have a love hate relationship with him, I love and adore how protective he is of Shannon and how he’s always there for her. But then he acts too much like a real guy and then I’m just like ughh, he’s kinda gross, his attitude was the worst, too aggressive and mad at everyone around him. I know that he’s going through some rough things too and that’s why he’s acting like that but still🤷🏻‍♀️ i don’t care, also him talking about his dick 24/7 was driving me insane, “It’s part of the plot” “it’s important to him” “that’s why it’s mentioned so much” blah blah blah. I know that and I don’t give a fuck, I think most readers knows how to retain information while reading, it’s not necessary for the same thing being reminded over and over again in every chapter because I ALREADY KNOW IT.

One aspect I truly disliked was how Johnny often carried himself as though he were untouchable, acting like a god both on and off the rugby field. Yes, he’s talented, and his role in the sport is significant, but that doesn’t justify his hostility toward almost everyone around him, including Shannon in certain scenes. He thinks that every one needs to do as he says just because he is the captain and his parents are rich, that was incredibly off-putting. I understand his injury and the uncertainty about his future are weighing heavily on him, but it doesn’t excuse his behavior. His problems aren’t anyone else’s fault, yet he lashes out as if the world owes him something.

”I could ruin these people. I wanted to. Every cell in my brain was projecting nothing but rage and vengeance demanding I take back what they took from Shannon.”

⤷ wrap it up mafia boss.

Anyways, imagine my surprise when I realized that Johnny has dimples🤗 bonus points for that.


˚₊ · »-♡→ Johnny & Shannon

they are sweet together, I like them to some extent. Their relationship is slow burn but their romance and feelings aren’t. Yeah, it took them long to kiss but to be honest it was kind of insta love because they were over heels for the other since the first day. Not that I’m complaining too much because I was giggling over them holding hands and hugging.


➳ side characters:

𐙚joey: I love him, my favorite character of the series for now. I actually started the series just to read his books, he is the best big brother, father, guardian, whatever you want to call him. But no one can argue with me and tell that he didn’t gave his everything to his siblings. I’m so ready to cry in his book.

⤷“Ollie, Tadhg and Sean all hurried into the kitchen then with backpacks on their backs. All three of them went straight to Joey. Because he was our protector. He was the reason we were all in one piece. He was our hero.”🥺🥺

𐙚aoife: I love how she’s always there for joey and she seems so sweet and caring, can’t wait to read her books.

𐙚gibsie & claire: they are so cute together, I like how they add humor to the book. Gibsie is such a good friend to Johnny, unfortunately I do think that it is one side, I have my complains about Johnny when it comes to being a good friend but I’m going to hold them back. I am fond of how Claire is always there for Shannon and it’s always trying to cheer her up.

𐙚hughie & katie: I think the worst thing about reading this series so late it is that I know everything that happens, so every time I see a scene about hughie and katie its in the back of my head that Lizzie is going to be in the middle of them so I can’t really appreciate their scenes together.

𐙚marie: she is a complex character, a victim but also someone to blame. I hate her, simply like that. I’m sorry but my empathy doesn’t work for her.


♬⋆.˚ johnny & shannon mini playlistᰔ

⤷ unsteady ⟡ gracie abrams { Shannon’s song }
⤷ broken home ⟡ 5sos
⤷ mess it up ⟡ gracie abrams
⤷ family line ⟡ conan gray
⤷ she will be loved ⟡ maroon 5
⤷ place in me ⟡ luke hemmings


-‘๑’- my favorite quotes & scenes

・❥・ “But I already felt like I was drowning with her. That's how consumed I was in this girl. That's how much I loved her.”

・❥・“If this is love, then it's you. You are love."

・❥・“Because you're beautiful, Inside and out. Everywhere."

・❥・"I was starving for her and everything she was. Every part of her. Inside and out. I wanted to fight all her battles. I wanted to give her all her smiles and make her laugh and snatch her away from the rest of the world and keep her all to myself. I just wanted her. For keeps."

・❥・"Put your head up, Shannon like the river." Moments later, he draped his arm over my shoulder and pulled me into his side. "No one's going to hurt you."

・❥・"I'm going to hug you now." She hitched her leg over mine.
"Is that okay?" Don't do it. You'll never get over this girl.
"Yeah," I exhaled a ragged breath, feeling my heart smash against my ribcage, as she hovered above me. "That's okay."



____________

ᝰ.ᐟ pre-read: ᯓᡣ𐭩୭˚.

IT’S TIMEEEEE!!

Finally going to start the BOT series🤭 the fact that binding and keeping 13 has been on my tbr for three years is criminal😭 anyways I have an unhealthy obsession with Joey thanks to tiktok so I’m 99.9% sure that Joey and Aoife’s books are going to be my fav but still excited to read about Shannon and Johnny.

Hope this is worth the hype🤸🏻‍♂️🤞🏻

Also don’t know who Patrick Feely is, just know that he’s a farm boy but I get A LOT of edits of him in my fyp… I like him already.

₊˚⊹ ᰔ this is for my besties hoda and gabi❣️ ily

[Phuong ✯ · Rating 4 out of 5]

☆⋅⋆ ── 1st read 2020: 4.25 stars
☆⋅⋆ ─── 2nd read 2023: 4.5 stars

SONG :
Alec Benjamin – If We Have Each Other

"Boom, boom, fucking boom," I groaned, slapping a hand against my chest. "I'm done for."

this book. this series. these characters. the Johnny being high on drugs in the hospital scene at the end of the book will always live in my mind forever and always.



Mariana Zapata: Hi, my name is Mariana Zapata and what you should know about me is that I write super long slowburn romances.
Chloe Walsh: hold my fucking beer.
Chloe Walsh:*goes on to write a highschool-coming-of-age story that is over 800+ pages long where all the H and h do is kiss for like maybe 3 times and it's glorious*

I'd love to write a review for this, but

1. my emotions are all over the place right now after that cliffhanger. What the hell???

2. I have other things to do like start the sequel to this book which is over 900 pages ...

so uhm... excuse me, but I have other priorities. Just know that I'm taking custody of all the boys of Tommen. This needs to be enough for now.

I've finished both books and decided to write one extremely long review for both Binding 13 and Keeping 13 HERE. What to expect: lots of tears & mental breakdowns.

#1 Binding 13 ↠ 4.25 stars
#2 Keeping 13 ↠ 5 stars

[jasmine •｡ꪆৎ ˚⋅ (semi-hiatus) · Rating 3 out of 5]

⤷Johnny needed to talk about his balls less 😞

[Iqra · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5*

I had no intention of writing a review but the words were banging around my brain screaming to be let out so here we are. . .

I was completely hooked from the start. The writing was so easy to read, it was very straight forward. After reading Nocticadia, the simplicity was exactly what I needed.
The story felt very mindless from the beginning to middle of the book but it really picked up after that.

This book is not perfect at all. Despite that I adore the characters and their relationships both familial and romantic.

Shannon is my traumatised lovable sweet and smol pookie 😭 I actually feel for her sfb. I just wanna give her a hug for 15373747 years it’s not fairrrrrr 💔
The heartache from reading about her past and seeing how she suffered sm brought me to tears. I felt like jumping into the book and using all the tools in the universe to get retribution on everyone who hurt her istg- 🔪

I can understand how her size and age being emphasised again and again could annoy anyone really but to me it just drills in the fact that all this was happening to a fifteen year old girl that should’ve been living her life normally. Her house, her home, the place she rests her head(!!) is supposed to allow her to de-stress and find some peace. What should’ve been her sanctuary was actually the most destructive place for her. Her small frame is directly linked to this as well. It’s really shitty to read about and I hate this for her (ಡ_ಡ)

There wasn’t much of Shannon being carefree but she was adorable asf when she was in her element. Them playing GTA was the most I’ve seen her let go and gahhhh I loved every second of it 🤭💗🫂

*

Johnny is the most precious guy ever. What I love the most about him is that when he feels really solid about what he wants, he goes after it with his all. But what came out of his all or nothing attitude towards life hurttttttt ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

Him being indecisive about whether he wanted to pursue a relationship with Shannon was so valid. The reservations he’s kept and been reiterating in his head for years, about how his profession isn’t gonna leave any room for a relationship, that can’t just be broken down within seconds. It’s frustrating to read about sure but I understand the reason behind it.

Watching him go from being calculated and orderly to berserk and punching her bullies had me going ferallll andjdhdj 💃 It shows exactly how much she’s affected him and his life.

Ugh I love him sfmmmm 🥹💗💗

That hospital chapter was worth EVERYTHINGHHH 🤧✋ he made my heart go woah fr.

He was actually so funny omfdssss. There were so many times he had me howling bc of his one liners 😭 he’s iconic, it’s true.
Him being so adorableeeeee towards Shannon and the small moments between them had me shaking screaming dying. I love them together sfm it hurts.
When he would thread his hand through her hair and ask for consent to hug her? ☝️. . . 💃🚂
his affectionate touches? *sigh*
HIM MAKING A PLAYLIST THAT REMINDS HIM OF HER?? 🤸🕳️
Even the little things he would do like holding her bag or giving her his jacket?
searching for her lost shoe in the rain???
EVERYTHING.
It all got to me. I’m obsessed.

Gibsieeee my best boi. I absolutely adore the shit outta this guy. He’s my top man. The way he made me laffff so fucking loud at the most inopportune moments ugh chefs kiss. Especially when he was annoying Johnny abt his ~problems~ Omf I was wheezing. (He gives Seth vibes so hard I’m in loveeeee 🙏)
Also the sum sum we’re getting with him and claire is not enough!!! I need moreee 😭

Joey 😭😭 my heart goes out to him. This guy deserves to have everything in every universe. He’s the best brother. Him leaving Shannon there bc he couldn’t take it anymore killed me even tho I’m glad he put himself first (╥_╥)
I wanna cry just thinking about the ending of this book 😭🔫

The only thing I will say is that this book has a certain style of writing that doesn’t fit everyone. But personally I felt like there’s something really effective in Chloe’s writing that makes me connect to the characters and their situations.

What bugged me most was the fact that there were a lot of scenes that I felt were kind of pointless idk. For example the denial scenes, Iykyk. There were too many of them. One or two is fine but EIGHT?! That could’ve been cut down. Especially bc those scenes would be so long and their conversations would not add anything big to the plot.
Also there’s a difference between him denying his love for Shannon and him being indecisive over wanting a relationship with her. The former just annoyed me a lot.

However, there were certain scenes which were used again and again but I felt they were necessary. For example, JohnnyShannon and their drives or Johnny taking care of Shannon however he can. It’s important for this to be shown more than once bc Shannon needs to feel that steady stability, that removal of doubts, which he’s giving her by repeating those reassuring words and actions. She needs to feel like he’s a constant in her life and that he’s reliable enough to be her safe haven.
Even though there’s a long way for them to reach that level of trust, these scenes are basically the groundwork to get there. I love that we got to see most of these scenes fully playing out and not just being told he drove her home BAM end scene yk?

There was ONE part which I would’ve died for and that was when he took her to the cinema 😭 it’s not fairrrr! Chloe release that scene from the vault I beg 🔪

So basically this book made me laugh like a hyena (mostly gibsie’s fault), cringe quite a bit, hunt for a grave to temporarily lie in, sport the biggest grin, vibrate with anxiety, lose years off my life, develop wrinkles, and cry. Definitely the crying :)

. . . I loved it <3

𝗦𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲:
I’ve been spoiled for some couples in the series and I think I’m glad for it bc now I can get giddy over all their small interactions 🤭

𝗦𝗼𝗻𝗴𝘀: 🎧

My Boys of Tommen Playlist

𝗙𝗮𝘃 𝗤𝘂𝗼𝘁𝗲𝘀: spoilers in this section! Proceed w caution!!

♡︎ “She opened her eyes and fuck me, I unintentionally sucked in a sharp breath.
Jesus, this girl was beautiful.
I'd noticed it earlier of course, she had a striking look about her, but now, seeing her up close like this and being able to count the freckles on her face – eleven by the way – it was hitting home just how striking she was.”
~him counting her freckles >>>

♡︎ "You promise?" she whispered, a tiny smile pulling at her swollen lips.
"Yeah," I replied gruffly, feeling like I would promise all the fucking promises in the world just to make this girl feel better. "I've got your back."

♡︎ "Fuck you," Ronan strangled out, spluttering and wheezing. "You can't tell me what to do," he rasped, breathless. "You're not my father!"
This fucker.
"I'm your daddy on the field, bitch."
~WUAHAHHAAHHA HE WILL FOREVER BE FAMOUS FOR THIS 👑💅🙏

♡︎ "Why me?" I groaned.
"Because we're your babies," Hughie announced, leaning his weight on me.
"My babies?" I slurred. "How the fuck are you three anyone's babies?"
-LMFAO

♡︎ "I think you broke my nose, Johnny."
"Your nose will heal after a break."
"But your spine won't."
~ OHMYFUCKINGAJGDJFHD HAHAHAHHAAH PLS THAT WAS SO ICONICC 👑🙏

♡︎ "Are you hurt?"
His gaze followed mine to his thigh and he quickly yanked his hand away.
"Jesus," he grunted, looking appalled, "I didn’t realize I was doing that."
"You've been touching yourself since we got in the car," I announced.
"Jesus Christ!" Johnny hissed, gaping at me in horror.
~STAHPPP IM CRYINGGG HAHHAHA

♡︎ I had learned a valuable lesson tonight though, and that was to never ask a girl what she was thinking if you weren't prepared to take a huge fucking knock to the ego.
~💀💀💀💀

♡︎ "It's okay, Shan," he whispered, comforting me.
"I'm sorry," I choked out, tightening my hold on his neck. Tears spilled over my cheeks. "I'm so sorry, Joe."
"It's not your fault, Shan."
~CRYING FAT UGLY TEARS VOL 1

♡︎ With wide eyes, I watched as Johnny unzipped the black coat he was wearing and draped it over my shoulders.
"Come on," he said in a coaxing tone as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders, tucked me into his side, and led me out of school. "I'll take care of you."
~stab me in the heart already

♡︎ "Who wants to call my girlfriend a wh*re to my face?"
~kshsjdjdjdj the euphoria I feel rn I’m in BLISS

♡︎ “And when you fuck with her, you fuck with me."
~POP OFFF

♡︎ I stood there for a long ass minute, giving every one of those BCS scum a glare, and waiting for a response.
~WHY IS THIS FUCKING HILARIOUS PLSSS 😭✋

♡︎ Grabbing the front of my shirt, he dragged me towards him and sniffed my mouth.
"You traitor!" he choked out, looking comically horrified. "You went to the chipper!"
"Yeah, I did," I replied, shoving away from him. "And it was fucking delicious, and I have no regrets."
"What did you have?"
"A few cheeseburgers and a curry-chips."
"How did it taste?"
"Better than sex."
"We're supposed to be on a diet!" Gibsie hissed in an appalled tone before quickly asking, "Did you get me something?"
"Yeah, I got you a burger."
"Thanks, Johnny."
"And then I got hungry so I ate it."
"You're a monster."
~HAHAHHAHAHA IM IN LOVE W GIBSIE SMSMSM he’s basically Seth from another dimension 🤌

♡︎ “I'm going to hug you," Johnny whispered in my ear. "Tell me if that's not okay?”
~ugh

♡︎ "You're not coming back, are you?"
Joey just stared at me, eyes filled with tears. "I can't," he whispered as a tear rolled down his cheek.
~vol 2

♡︎ She looked right through all the bullshit.
Seeing me.
Seeing only me.
And that made me want to move some shit around and place her slap bang in the middle of my world.
~mhm yes pls that would be nice

♡︎ "Should I hug you?"
~GIBSIE I LOVE YOU SFM 😭 look at him being soft

♡︎ "Johnny?" she whispered.
"Yeah?"
"Hi," she breathed, edging closer.
"Hi," I croaked out,
~why does this get me every damn time?!

♡︎ "Johnny?" Shannon whispered again.
"Yeah?"
"I’m going to hug you now." She hitched her leg over mine. "Is that okay?"
Don’t do it.
You'll never get over this girl.
"Yeah," I exhaled a ragged breath, feeling my heart smash against my ribcage, as she hovered above me. "That's okay."
~*cries in single*

♡︎ Once I committed myself, once my heart laid claim on her, I might as well slap a label on my forehead stating I'm yours, please be gentle with me because I'm here to stay.
~I absolutely love and adore his thought process here

♡︎ "I am losing my bleeding mind, Gibs."
"Nah, your mind's still there," Gibsie chuckled, patting my shoulder. "It's your heart you’re losing, lad."
~gibsie being wise is so hot

♡︎ “Shannon like the river. Will you please be my friend?“
~smh

♡︎ "I can keep a secret, Johnny Kavanagh," I whispered, stroking his cheek with my fingers. "And I promise I'll keep yours."
With his hand still cupping the side of my neck, Johnny exhaled a heavy sigh and let his head fall forward, his hair brushing my neck.
~this whole chapter wrecked me in the best and worst way but this scene was worth it

♡︎ “Was I stoned?
Did Gibsie get me high?
That bastard…”
~HAHAHAHA

♡︎ "She makes my heart go, like, whoa."
"Is that right?" he mused.
"So bad, Da," I sighed. "Boom, boom, fucking boom."
~I’m cackling

♡︎ "Hi, Johnny."
"Boom, boom, fucking boom, Da," I groaned, slapping a hand against my chest. "I'm done for."
~*dreamy sigh*

♡︎ "It's family only."
"She's my wife," he announced then, blowing my mind clean open.
~IM SCREAMING

♡︎ “Bring the lights back, Da," Johnny instructed, slurring his words. "Light up the world. You need to see this girl."
~STAHPPP HES SO FUCKING WHOLESOME IMMA CRY

♡︎ “Shaking, I curled up as small as I could and clenched my eyes shut.“
~vol 10

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

IM FUCKING HYSTERICAL RN SHOULDER SHAKING PAIN FILLED SOBS RACKING MY BODY I CANT BREATHE MY EYES ARE BURNING FROM CRYING SO MUCH SOMEONE CALL FOR HELP-

I’m literally CLAWING at my chest to make the pain stoppp (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

CHLOE WALSH IM COMING FOR YOU- 🔪

That ending was foul as fuck 😭 i don’t think I’ll ever recover

I have no idea if I’m gonna write a review for this bc it’s ruined me. I am RUINED.

***
BR w LuluBear 🤭🩷
The way I need to love this book so bad 😭🤞

[sama ୨୧ · Rating 5 out of 5]

∞ stars ✮
there are no fictional humans I love more than these two. the most precious, cutest, sweetest couple ever.

🩷 "She makes my heart go, like, whoa." "Is that right?" he mused. "So bad, Da," I sighed. "Boom, boom, fucking boom." I shook my head. "All the time." 🩷

tbh. idek how to start this review. like I have so many feelings and I don’t know how to put them into coherent sentences. this book will make you feel every emotion there is to feel. maybe even new ones, you didn’t know you had. it feels real yk? it feels like these are two actual people I’ve read about bc the story is that fleshed out and detailed <33 they’re my roman empire FOREVER AND EVER!! ok let me stop babbling now and get into the review LMFAO

💌 plot 💌

I feel like most people know the plot of this book, but i’m gonna write it out anyways bc why not HAHAHA.

shannon lynch has had a rough life. always picked on by the kids at school. shamed, teased, bullied. but she had it worse at home. the only girl amongst her 5 siblings and the easiest target for her father. any chance he gets, he will beat her to a pulp. after going through so much tormenting at school, her family decides to move her to tommen, ballylaggin’s most prestigious private school. that is where she meets the only boy that makes her feel safe. the love of my her life <33 and he shows her what it’s really like to be cared for, and loved.

🍓 shannon lynch 🍓

🤎 I once read somewhere that we mature with damage, not with age. 🤎

she broke my heart. SHE’S JUST A KID!! but she basically raised 3 kids all on her own. she took care of sean, tahdg and ollie more than her mom ever did and it makes me SO MAD. all her mom did was cry for no reason whilst she watched her kids get ABUSED and TORMENTED 🙁

a lot of people don’t like her too much bc she’s too stubborn or awkward but my god can you blame her? with that trauma, it’s impressive she can even trust anyone when she can’t feel safe around her own parents 💔

💌I liked safe. In my world, invisibility equaled safety.
I was happy to be wallpaper and blend in. 💌

guys. she is literally my spirit animal. I know what it’s like to fear your own family. and it fucking sucks. being scared whenever they walk into a room, finding any possible excuse to leave the house, it’s genuinely horrible. when we are together, it always ends in me crying. there’s always something “imperfect” about me to comment on just so there’s a reason to yell. and that’s why I felt her to my core. she never did anything but she always suffered for absolutely no reason. just bc her dad felt like using a punching bag. like her, I don’t have a temper, I just sob, and sob, and sob.

🧸 I was annoyed with myself for being the kind of person who cried when angry. I wanted to be a shouter. A shouter was much better than a crier. 🧸

never did I want to jump into a book and give a character a hug as much as I did in this moment. shannon lynch, you are so strong <3

🏉 johnny kavanagh 🏉

ohmygod. I can’t even talk about him without squealing like a lovesick teenage girl (newsflash: I am a lovesick teenage girl). he makes me so giddy it’s actually fucking WEIRD. and then I remember he’s just words and I get depressed. ask my bsf, I will vent to her about him for hours like he’s an actual PERSON.

the most greenest forest in the universe. in a world of gross filthy boys, he is a gentleman and everything more 🥹 he cared for shannon in a way I’ve never seen with any other man. he was masculine and attractive, but without that toxicity and gross ego they usually have. he made her FEEL SAFE, when she thought she couldn’t with anyone else in the world. I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him I love him.
anyways. I love him. did I mention that? I don’t think I did.

🎀I can take you home when you have to go? What the actual fuck? I might as well have shouted, love me, fucking love me at the girl. 🎀

hey siri, play “you are in love” by taylor swift

BECAUSE MY GUY IS WHIPPED!! he’s so perfect, and he only had eyes on her when everyone else wanted him (me included) and she was literally ignoring him.

☄️ Shannon Lynch had eyes the color of midnight blue that wouldn’t stay the fuck out of my head. ☄️

…and this was shortly after they first met. I don’t even love the “love at first sight” thing but I was obsessed with it here that I didn’t even care. (it’s still a slow burn though dw 😉)

🌺 other characters 🌺

🥃 joey lynch: he’s the best brother one could ever have. I wish I had him in my life he’s so supportive, so sweet, no matter how fucked up his life is, he’s still there to hold his siblings’ hand and support them (unlike darren 🙄) his book is so beautiful but heartbreaking please go read it and see how much my baby goes through <3 he’s so strong

💘 eden kavanagh: my favourite fictional mother <3 I love her so much, it’s no wonder johnny turned out so perfect!! she’s hilarious and so kind and sweet to shannon 😭💗

🥳 gerard gibson: im scared for his book bc everyone says it sucks but i know no matter what, I will forever love him so much. he is the bestest friend johnny could’ve asked for, i love him with all my heart. everyone needs a bestie like gerard gibson in their life or they are missing out 🤍

🛍️ aoife molloy: im obsessed with her. you don’t see much of her here but in the rest of the books you see how perfect she is for Joey and the way she stuck by him no matter what 💗

😵‍💫 shannon’s dad: disgusting excuse for a human being. he can rot in hell idc.

💐quotes 💐

ignore the fact that there’s a million quotes i just love them so much 😣

➼ She was so fucking beautiful it was painful, with those big blue eyes staring back at me all innocent and full of uncertainty.

➼ "I’m going to hug you now." She hitched her leg over mine. "Is that okay?" Don’t do it. You'll never get over this girl. "Yeah," I exhaled a ragged breath, feeling my heart smash against my ribcage, as she hovered above me. "That's okay."

➼ "You can't tell me what to do," he rasped, breathless. "You're not my father!" This fucker. He was determined to defy me even when he couldn’t win. "I'm your daddy on the field, bitch."

➼ Johnny rewarded me with a boyish smirk that quickly morphed into a frown as he looked at my face. "What happened?" he demanded, glaring down at me. "Who the fuck made you cry?"

➼ God, he was just so beautiful, it was painful. Everything about Johnny Kavanagh was pure perfection.

➼ "Put your head up, Shannon like the river." Moments later, he draped his arm over my shoulder and pulled me into his side. "No one's going to hurt you."

➼ I believed him when he told me I was safe with him.

➼ "Now," I sneered, glaring down at their faces. "Who wants to call my girlfriend a whore to my face?"

I think I should stop before I start quoting the entire book

🌸 conclusion 🌸

this review is long overdue im so sorry HAHAHA. but its here!! and i hope you like it <3 this book is perfection, no matter how much I yapped in my review, no amount of words could possibly do it justice.

you will never read found family this good. i have yet to, and i feel like i never will. the bond between all of them is so strong and they all found eachother and healed together it really is beautiful. I would read pages and pages of them just hanging out. bc they’re that entertaining.

anyways this is my favourite series in the whole wide world and I fear I will never shut up about it in the foreseeable future so you may as well just read it and do us both a favour 🙈🙈 also here’s a lil playlist I made if you wanna check it out!! listening to “she will be loved” by maroon 5 hits different after this book 😭😭

ily pookies, happy reading <3

————
AAAA IM STILL SCREAMING. IM SO OBSESSED

the way i’ve read this before and im still stunned is actually insane. it frustrates me that I can’t just jump into keeping 13 straight away but I WILL. this really broke and shattered me even more than it did the first time. prepare for the longest review ever I have so much to say. but it won’t be until late june, after exams im sorry 💗

5 stars. 🥹🫶🏼 duh. rtc <33

[chloé ✿ · Rating 4 out of 5]

update 7/11/25: i have not stopped thinking about these characters since finishing this book. they are everything.
________________________________

why did i put this series off for so long??

was the writing pretty juvenile to begin with? yeah, sure. but the topics weren’t.

is shannon excessively TINY and are there too many comments about broken penises? yes, 100%. but i will be finishing this series and i don’t think i can get enough. this book could’ve been even longer and i would never have complained.

i’ll be honest, for the first 200-250 pages i was skeptical. it was all a bit cheesy and a bit over the top at the same time. the characters started out really unrealistic. johnny being as cocky as he was at 17-years-old was unbelievable and felt wayyyyyy too overdone (not to mention all the jokes about his dick.)

BUT… hear me out

at 250-ish pages, this got deeper, more serious, and less cheesy. i was fully invested.

the most important part of this book to me is that our characters are minors but do not have the chance to be normal teenagers. johnny, due to the nature of his rugby talent, and shannon, because of her home life and her history of being bullied. shannon is too small for a reason and johnny is too serious for a reason.

i related to the characters more than i ever imagined i could.

when i realized that they weren’t normal teenagers because they weren’t ALLOWED to be, i fell in love with them and this entire story. this book is so much deeper than it initially seems. it’s not just a romance.

these characters have officially captured my heart, including all of the side characters. my heart aches for everyone and i just want them to be happy. they shouldn't have to deal with the problems that they do at such a young age.

if nothing else has convinced you to read this series yet, just let me tell you one thing: all he wants to do is protect her. even if it costs him everything.

i have a feeling this entire series may become my roman empire and the fact that chloe walsh may have at least(!) a handful of new books planned has me foaming at the mouth.

i would be doing the book a disservice if i didn’t mention that the johnny hospital scene will live in my head rent-free FOREVER.

"boom, boom, fucking boom… i’m done for."

and of course… i have to mention the ending. absolutely CRIMINAL.

if you have triggers, do your research before diving into this series. (please)

[chan ☆ · Rating 3 out of 5]

i have such complicated feelings about this one. for every pro, i also have a con.

i enjoyed the slow burn & build of the relationship... but the book was too long. (no really, why the fuck was the audiobook in 2 separate parts???? why did it take an entire day to read this book at 3x speed???)

i appreciate seeing realistic home lives that are challenging... but there was too much on page depiction of abuse for my taste.

being a teen is awkward! but there were a lot of moments that made me cringe in an unpleasant way.

i could go on forever honestly. but it wouldn't get me any closer to figuring out how i really feel about this one. i'm settling on a 3 star rating for now.

[drew :) · Rating 1 out of 5]

dnf @10

I’ve seen this book all over tiktok and no one mentioned this is a romance between a 15&17 year olds (personally I get the ick reading any books with underage characters if the book is considered adult romance) also the cover is SOOOO misleading like you’re going to put naked people on the cover for a book about a 15 year old fmc & a 17 year old mmc???

[shei · Rating 5 out of 5]

—— 5 ✰ stars.

‘Because you’re beautiful. Inside and out. Everywhere’

・❥・ Mood of the book:
: ̗̀➛ Look After You by The Fray
: ̗̀➛ She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5
: ̗̀➛ Those Eyes by New West
: ̗̀➛ Brutal by Olivia Rodrigo

second read feb 18 2025:

this book owns me, these characters feel real, because the pain and the love that i feel, are definitely fucking real. Shannon and Johnny are one of my favorite people, only dethroned by Gerard Gibson, and Joey Lynch and I fucking wish I could give the lot of them a fucking hug.

read this bloody book if you didn’t already.

first read feb 11 2024:

I've been staring at my computer screen for half an hour without knowing what to write about this book. I still don't know how to feel about it, I really didn't even expect to like it this much, but I was really surprised.

'she was like a tornado I never saw coming'

First of all, I want to say that my dear giuls gave me this book for Christmas, and surely if it weren't for her, I wouldn't have read it, therefore, this book is even more special just because of you. I love you bleeding eejit.

Returning to the book, I could say a few reasons why this book might not be 5.✰ stars, small details that in other books would make me lower the rating, but as I have said other times, 5.✰ stars is a feeling, not a set of objective things that a book has to bring together, if not a set of emotions that it has to make me feel. This book is not perfect objectively speaking, but it is perfect in my heart.

‘Relax’ Johnny whispered in my ear, distracting me from my memories. ‘You are safe with me.’

Before continuing with the review, I advise that, if you want to read the book, you check the trigger warnings first, since it deals with quite strong topics. Also make it clear that the love story is not the main plot, and that the main characters are TEENAGERS, they are 15/16 and 17 years old. Once this is noted, we can continue.

•┈••✦ 𝒑𝒍𝒐𝒕 ✦••┈•:

We follow Shannon Lynch, a 15-year-old girl with a very hard life, who due to constant bullying at her previous school, has transferred to Tommen, there, after an accident with a rugby ball, she meets Johnny Kavanagh, a young rugby promise, at this moment, everything changes for them, Johnny finds himself interested in something other than rugby for the first time in his life, and Shannon will find for the first time a feeling foreign to her, feeling safe.

'come on, I'll look after you'

If you're expecting a book full of plot twists or action, turn around and leave because this isn't it. I wouldn't say it's a character driven story, but it's not a plot story either. It's very slice of life. I know the length of the book is intimidating, but the writing is so fast and addictive that I read it as if it were 300 pages instead of 800.

•┈••✦ 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒔 ✦••┈•:

*:･ﾟ｡ 𝑺𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒐𝒏 𝑳𝒚𝒏𝒄𝒉 *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Better known as Shannon like the river. Shannon is a fragile girl, who has a very hard and complicated life, she doesn't trust anyone, only her brother Joey. Reading Shannon's points of views were really painful, her way of seeing life, her desperation, her fear, her pain, her feelings, I could feel her fear on my own skin.

'I once read somewhere that we mature with damage, not with age'

She is very innocent and sometimes her innocence created cringe moments where I wanted to hide under my blanket and not come out for the next three months, but at the same time it was funny because, at the end of the day, they are teenagers, and we all went through these things.

*:･ﾟ｡ 𝑱𝒐𝒉𝒏𝒏𝒚 𝑲𝒂𝒗𝒂𝒏𝒂𝒈𝒉 *ੈ✩‧₊˚

LISTEN TO ME. JOHNNY FUCKING KAVANAGH IS IT. HE IS THE STANDARD, AND WE DESERVE SOMEONE LIKE HIM, NOTHING LESS.

Johnny is 17 years old, and he is a promising rugby player, his whole life revolves around that, his future plans and how he behaves, but there is a problem, Johnny had surgery not long ago, which still hasn't properly healed, and he still decides to play and put his health at risk for fear of being left without his opportunity.

He is a very mature boy for his age, with enormous respect for girls. He immediately sees Shannon's fragility and feels that he must keep her safe. Shannon's age is very important to him, since he feels that he is too old for her. , which is understandable, but at the same time it was frustrating, since we all had a crush in high school older or younger than us, after all they are both teenagers.

'tell me who made you cry and I'll fix it'

*:･ﾟ｡ 𝑱𝒐𝒆𝒚 𝑳𝒚𝒏𝒄𝒉 *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Joey is Shannon's older brother, and for her, her hero. We didn't get much of him, but I'm already looking forward to reading his books and his relationship with Aoife. He takes care of his siblings like no one else and is one of the strongest people in the book. My heart breaks for him.

'He was the reason we were all in one piece. He was our hero'

*:･ﾟ｡ 𝑮𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒓𝒅 '𝑮𝒊𝒃𝒔𝒊𝒆' 𝑮𝒊𝒃𝒔𝒐𝒏 *ੈ✩‧₊˚

GIBSIEEEEEEEE MY BABYYYY AAAAA!!!! OK, we need to calm down. I have loved him with all my heart, he is Johnny's best friend and teammate in Tommen, the relationship between them is wonderful, there were a couple of times I cried from laughter with their conversations. Gibsie cares for Johnny even though he doesn't let himself be cared for, and also from Shannon since he knows how much she means to Johnny. I am very interested in his relationship with Claire and knowing that he is going to have his book makes me go AAAAAAAAAA!

'Hail, rain or snow, Gibsie had my back'

•┈••✦ 𝒓𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 ✦••┈•:

'Hi, Johnny'
'Hi, Shannon'

When I tell you that it is the sweetest and purest romance I have ever read, I am not kidding. It is the perfect definition of first love. And this is one of the reasons for my 5.✰ stars, I could feel the butterflies fluttering in my stomach the entire time, it was like feeling my first high school love again.

'Jesus, this girl was beautiful.'
'I'd noticed it earlier of course, she had a striking look about her, but now, seeing her up close like this and being able to count the freckles on her face – eleven by the way – it was hitting home just how striking she was.'

I don't want to delve too deeply into their relationship because apart from not being the main theme of the book, it is better that you see it for yourself when you read it.

•┈••✦ 𝒔𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒓 𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒆 𝒒𝒖𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔 ✦••┈•:

I could add countless more, but I really don't want to give clues about anything at all.

‘But it was those wild eyes that really struck me and I had this crazy urge to google eye color charts just so I could figure out the fucking color blue in her eyes’

‘Sooner or later, he would be back, promising heaven and delivering hell.’

‘she was lovely. she didn’t need to hide any of her shine behind those bleeding shutters’

‘im yours, please be gentle with me because I’m here to stay.'

‘The smile Johnny rewarded me with was wide, genuine and breathtakingly beautiful. God, he looked like a different person when he smiled’

Well lads, this was all. I hope to read the next one very soon because the ending was painful as shite and I’m hurt as balls.

➙ Old Updates:

well. I’m not ok 👍🏻 I might need Chloe billing address to send her my therapy bills bitch

rtc of course

feb 7: let’s see what’s with this 👀. Also giuls pls DONT have a heart attack but… it’s finally happening

[maya · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ladies, Gentlemen, and Non-Binary Pals of Goodreads, may you be so kind as to donate whatever your noble self can so we can get Miss Chloe an editor? By doing so, you will be contributing to saving paper, valuable resources, and the reader's mental health as well as time. Thank you :)

Before you proceed, I would like for you to understand that the following rant review contains a lot of swearing, incoherent rambling, and capitalized yelling. Reader discretion is advised.

--

lol that was fun, but now:



Seriously, one thing I absolutely hate, no matter what genre I'm reading is telling instead of showing. This had SO MUCH of telling, SO MUCH - LIKE PAGES WORTH OF - inner dialogue and FOR WHAT?! The book was written in dual pov, so for most of the book I just had to see them both mentally waxing poetry about how good the other person looks. AND THERE WAS SM BELLA CONTENT? Like fuck her, why did I have to read SO much about her, I really don't understand. And all the scenes she was in were literally the same



In Johnny's case - he only started to grow on me in the chapter where he was out of his senses and didn't know what he was saying. That is when I liked him most. We're told he's extremely picky when it comes to the girls he surrounds himself with, while in reality, his last fuck-buddy is an obsessive stardom-crazy bitch, and the girl he "falls" for is a girl with "lonesome" eyes and a dysfunctional family.

I SWEAR TO GOD, THAT MAN HAS A LONER SAD GIRL KINK. Every time he had to describe her, he would mention how she was lonesome, fragile, uncertain - like yeah, makes you believe he absolutely loves the girl, doesn't it? 🙃

We're told that he sticks to his routine, nothing in his life is more important than rugby, and he will not lose sight of what is important to him. In his pov, during the never-ending inner monologue, he goes on and on about how he's not one of those guys who waste their time on drinking and pussies. No, he has more important shit to do. In reality, he ignores his training for Shannon, goes out to drink with Gibs whenever invited, gets multiple hard-ons for Shannon, and cannot stop seeking her out everywhere after only meeting her once . Yup, what a focused man.

We're also told ample times that he hates lies when in reality, he tells multiple lies himself. Love me a hypocrite <3

But I can ignore all this. What got to me most was his indecisiveness, and hot and cold behavior. He will think about how beautiful she is obsessively. He'll think about how much he likes her. He'll drop the l-bombs too - which they both do, as and when they wish, and then go back to the "i don't even know you / we're friends" bs - will give her multiple hints that he likes her because he'll always protect her whenever she's in trouble, go out of his way to give her multiple lifts home, share secrets about his injuries etc and then always center back to "I cannot afford to do this," "my career is on the line," "i will go away so it'll only end up with both of us being hurt" - and this repeated for like 800 pages, LIKE FOR FUCKS SAKE PICK A SIDE!

The thing I liked about him though was how he always stood up Shannon, didn't get under anybody's influence, took good decisions even while drunk, and had a very cute dog. His morphine episode really made him extremely adorable and fun to read about, but we came back to good ol' johnny when he woke up from his drug-induced coma. ALSO, HEART EYES FOR HIS PARENTS!



2018 me would've been on her knees for him though, given how protective he was. maybe i don't like him much bec the guy saves and protects the girl ALWAYS is not something i particularly enjoy reading now and that was what happened throughout the book.



Moving on to Shannon, i'm going to try my best to get this across without coming across as a heartless bitch - I did not care about her. Yes, I felt bad about her situation. Yes, I wanted her to get out of her fucked up home. Yes, I disliked her parents. But her as a character, outside of that, fell super flat for me. I just don't understand how there was no character development in her when the book was 800+ pages long. Like somebody please explain it to me. Multiple times the abuse also felt like a plot device to me, because it was only shown on two occasions. One where her father finds the newspaper article and at the end. The last chapter left an impact on me, but I wished it had happened sooner, yk? Because throughout the book, most of the time, it's just Johnny noticing all her bruises, and then questioning her about them. Her anxiety after being bullied relentlessly was justified, but I like to see my characters try and fight that, instead of settling into that. Also, I get that not every fmc has to be a badass but I would've liked seeing her mental battles, her tending to her bruises, her thinking about what she's been through, and how she could fight for herself. And I got none of that.



I like good slow burns as much as the next person, but there was absolutely no burn here for the major part of the book. I really was rooting for my babies Gibs and Claire more than the main couple. I'm salty about how little we got to see them, I NEED MORE! Everybody should have a best friend like Gibs, he was the highlight of the book for me. I absolutely love him he even let that pedophile bitch suck his dick to get Shannon's file that johnny wanted, like 😭

But for shannon and johnny, they went from 0 to 100 real quick, and went back to 0 even faster. Their whole dynamic was equal parts confusing and frustrating to me, and again, they just told us that they love the other person, but we never got to see how did that happen, or when did that happen. Like there was no flow to it. he just likes that she's not like other girls and she likes that he's hot and cares for her 😭😭

I was also living for the Aoife crumbs we got, I already love her!

The last chapter of this book was literally the most impactful one for me, and only for that is this book getting 3 stars. I really wish the whole book was like that, but I fucking hope keeping 13 does not disappoint me as much as this did.

To, Lila and Lilyya i'm sorry my loves, i really wanted to enjoy this, but it was a miss for me 🥲 i'm not giving up on keeping 13 though, i still have some hope <3

To, MUSKAAAN, I know I've said this multiple times, but I would've dnf-ed this without you. I only got the strength to see this to the end because I knew I could joke around with you about it! For my first ever buddy read, I absolutely cannot believe how much fun I had the hundreds of messages i've sent are probably a pretty clear testament to that 😂

ps: to anyone who enjoyed this, i love that for you! take this review with a grain of salt. and i might come back and write this properly again, for now excuse my mistakes, i just wanted to vent xx

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tbr-review (2?):
in lila, we trust 🧎🏽‍♀️

my first ever buddy read, and that too with my co-president of the wangxian fanclub (i was gonna steal that, i warned you 🌚), muskaan 💕 i couldn't be more excited!

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tbr review: being the judging-the-book-by-its-cover girl that i am, i really thought this was an adult romance 🥲

[Amal · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF.

this book is my number one enemy from now on. the first red flag should have been that its 887 pages, like wtf, who approved of this mess to be this long? the characters are so bland I was trying really hard to find something a bit interesting but nope it's like the author swore to make them so uninteresting on purpose. the book could have been 300 pages IF THE AUTHOR STOPPED TELLING EVERYTHING IN SUCH UNNECESSARY DETAIL. IT WAS LIKE 30 PAGES OF THE CHARACTERS JUST SWOONING OVER EACH OTHER AFTER MEETING ONE TIME. NO DIALOGUE. NO CONVERSATION. I was on page 180 or sth and nothing happened, literally nothing other than all the characters mentioning how tiny she is and how small she is and how she looks like a CHILD. she was such a fucking pick me always saying how she's different and doesn't care about boys like the other girls, then guess what she does? she keeps moaning about the first guy to ever show her attention, but sure she isn't boy obsessed like "the other girls" yeah okay. I skipped like 100 hundred pages and ta-da!! HE IS STILL SAYING SHE'S A KID AND HE SHOULDN'T BE ATTRACTED TO HER, SHE'S PISSED BC HE SAID SHE IS LIKE MOST GIRLS, LIKE BITCH I WISH YOU WERE LIKE MOST GIRLS AT LEAST YOU WOULD BE SOMEWHAT INTERESTING. there are still so many things that piss me off about this book but if I keep typing I won't finish. anyway, screw this book, screw the video I saw recommending this book, and screw me for not dnfing it sooner.

also, I searched how many times the word "tiny" is written, it's fucking 153 times. so if that doesn't scream run from this book idk what does.