*Thank you to the publisher and the author for a free e-copy in exchange for an honest review.*
Actual Rating: 3.5
As a 1.5 generation Taiwanese immigrant, when I saw that this was a contemporary teen romance taking place in the Taiwanese-American community and with the ever-so-relatable theme of parental pressure, I KNEW I had to read this.
Asking for a Friend follows Juliana Zhao, an optimist and hopeless romantic (even though she’s never been in a relationship). Ever since her father died and her older sister got pregnant and disowned, the weight of keeping the family together falls squarely on her shoulders. Her mother has her life’s next steps planned out for her: win the Asian Americans in Business Competition, and get into an Ivy League. When her partner abruptly drops her days before registration, Juliana is forced to turn to Garrett Tsai, who she used to be friends with, before he suddenly turned cold without explanation. And just for good measure, her mother disapproves of him too — he’s headed to art school — so now Juliana has to win the competition while making sure her mom doesn’t find out who her partner is. But as Juliana spends more time with Garrett and with the local Taiwanese cultural center, she starts wondering if what she’s been working towards is even what she really wants.
To start, I just want to say that I LOVED all the Taiwanese references: boba, Ai-yo, hot pot, the Taiwanese language feeling like a “secret language” spoken at home…as someone who’s never learned Taiwanese despite hearing the older generation speak it, I feel a sense of loss whenever I hear it and it was really comforting to see how accurate these emotions were described.
It’s more than that though — I felt like there was so much in this book I could relate to. Like Garrett, I went into art (and I was originally going to the same school, RISD before I got into a great university and my mother said I couldn’t NOT go.)
Ultimately, the best part of this book is undoubtedly the family aspect and the internal conflict of different identities clashing with each other. I will unashamedly admit that it made me cry. Even though my mom was never so overbearing as Juliana’s, there was a lot that any immigrant child will relate to, like the pressure of having to be successful so you appreciate everything your parents did for you, and the guilt if you aren’t. I also really love how realistic the book was from start to finish in terms of how Juliana’s mother was portrayed; there was no “everything is fixed and now it’s all sunshine and rainbows ending.” Instead, we simply saw Juliana question herself, and we saw a little hint of what the future of her family could be now that she’s grown and learned to communicate in a much better way.
I will say that I think this book could’ve benefitted from more refined writing. Especially at the start, there’s a lot of what feels like exposition dumps. The narration will name drop a person/place/thing, go into a few paragraphs explaining it with a backstory/anecdote, and then repeat the process when another name drop happens a few sentences later. It gets better as the book goes on since most things are already introduced, but it feels a lot like “telling, not showing” and I wish we’d incorporated more of these stories in other ways, rather than just having Juliana monologue these stories, one after another. Her narration is often much too on the nose.
I actually also found myself caring much more about the family relationship than the romance, which is pretty surprising for me. While I like Garrett, I feel like he wasn’t as well-rounded as Juliana was. I wonder if a two-person perspective writing style might’ve worked, because I actually really loved reading their advice posts. In fact, I think the two best characters are Juliana and her mother, while everyone else feels a little more paper thin. I wish we’d gotten to see or hear more about Bella, because her story has such a big presence in the book, but we never quite get to hear from her directly.
Ultimately, however, I did enjoy this one and it made me think a lot about my relationship with my parents. I’m also over the moon that more Taiwanese-American stories are getting published. More, please!