In this third book of the USA Today and #1 New York Times mega-bestselling They Both Die at the End series, two strangers—each with their own complicated relationship to Death-Cast—help each other learn to live.
Paz Dario stays up every night, waiting for the Death-Cast call that would mean he doesn’t have to keep faking his way through this lonely life. After a devastating day, Paz decides he’s done waiting around for Death-Cast. If they say he’s not dying, he’ll just have to prove them wrong. But right before Paz can die, a boy saves his life.
Alano Rosa is heir to the Death-Cast empire that encourages everyone to live their best lives, but he doesn’t feel in control of his own existence thanks to his father. And with a violent organization called the Death Guard threatening Alano, his End Day might be closer than he thinks. It’s time to live.
Fate brings Paz and Alano together, but it’s now up to the boys to survive the tragic trials ahead so no one dies at the end.
This book contains themes that some readers may find difficult.
Adam Silvera is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of They Both Die at the End and More Happy Than Not and History Is All You Left Me and Infinity Son and Infinity Reaper and with Becky Albertalli, What If It's Us and Here's to Us.
His next book The First to Die at the End releases October 4th, 2022, with the final Infinity Cycle book to follow soon after.
He was born in New York and now lives in Los Angeles where he writes full-time.
Can you hear me out? I really hope that when Adam Silvera submits his next manuscript, you won’t just be in awe of your client—or maybe scared to hurt his feelings—and actually tell him to trim, trim, and trim some more.
At its core, this is a powerful and important story. A bit too much insta love, sometimes a bit too cheesy, and sometimes a bit too A Little Life alike (please check the TW’s below), but overall a fantastic story. Sadly, it got buried under lots and lots and lots of words. It’s a book that should’ve punched me in the gut, and made me squirm as tears rolled down my cheeks. Instead, I found myself sighing and rushing through 720 pages. And still, it took me eleven freaking days to finish.
So, dear editor, if No One Knows Who Dies in the End is just as long—or longer—please, cut at least a third of it. Maybe even more. Sometimes fans need less, not more.
Still an Adam Silvera fan
TW: This book deals with suicide and self-harm. Not just a mention or a few pages, but like the whole story. So, if either of those topics is triggering for you, it might be best to skip this one.
2.5 / 5 good morning everypony today i have mustered up the energy to write my first ever full review on goodreads. spoilers ahead so yeah dead dove dont eat or whatever.
i was excited but honestly this book was a little bit too long and also kind of a chore to read through. i thought the pacing was fine for the most part, but i found myself skipping through many scenes because they dragged on for way too long. i think it would be easier to just list the things i liked and things i disliked
the parts i liked: - joaquin was a really intriguing character to me and i was never bored when he was on page. the fact that he loves his son so much but also tends to put pressure on him i found to be a very realistic situation. he says things that are awful and hurts alano, but there is never any doubt that he doesn’t do it out of malice. - paz’s guilt and feelings towards his father. the constant fear of turning out like him, the mourning the life he would never have with his father, i found it super engaging and heartfelt. - the initial portrayal of mental health. it kind of went downhill after a bit (more below) but i liked the way it explored paz’s mental state in the beginning, the constant need to act happy and the fear of not getting anywhere in his life. the humanization of bpd was nice to see, and it was nice to see bpd represented in someone you want to root for rather than being villainized. also was lovely to see an author with bpd write representation, even if i did have some qualms with it.
the parts i didnt like: - the constant callbacks: really felt unnecessary and tiring after a certain point. the first few nods to previous books i didnt take issue to, but after a while i found it quite tired. i would’ve preferred if the callbacks were more subtle, like they were in “the first to die in the end” rather than throwing it in your face. it felt like silvera was saying “oh oh and THEN this happened” and not trusting the reader to make inferences or piece together the small details by themselves. - the whole trying to make alano and paz seem like 'fated lovers' or as if they were 'connected by a red string' felt almost TOO perfect. im all for cheesy romcom stuff, but the way it all lines up to them being each other's gay awakenings from first sight kind of made me sigh internally. alano falling in love with paz after seeing him on screen was reasonable enough, but what do you mean paz realized he was gay at age 9 after seeing alano crying on the sidewalk? i wish they would've framed it better. - the mental health rep. as the book progressed i really didnt like the notation that mentally ill people need somebody else to save them and completely depend on someone else to live, especially for a character with bpd. its to highlight how important their relationship is but im really not into romanticizing unhealthy dynamics like that in a book aimed for YOUNG ADULTS, as realistic as it may be, and there were certain other ways to establish how meaningful their bond is (even though they barely just met). and the fact that we’re expecting alano to just be… completely fine after paz stakes his ENTIRE LIFE on him, and he doesn’t feel the strain or mental repercussions of this at all was also extremely unrealistic. - the SHEER amount of times the book tries to hammer into us that paz has bpd was offputting, it was like the author really really needed us to remember when really the book could've just represented it more in a show-not-tell manner. besides the whole "oh alano is talking to somebody else i want to die" thing, i just didnt find there to be much representation of what its like to have bpd. i know everybody with bpd is different but as somebody whos borderline paz's inner monologue felt almost overly dramatized to me and it was extremely surface level - appreciated the representation of mood swings and how abandonment can affect people with bpd, but i wanted to see MORE. - having alano be a walking computer who remembers everything felt almost cheap. it wasnt as big a thing as they make it out to be and (spoiler) the reveal he KNEW the secret since he was in utero was seriously bullshit in my opinion and a total cop out. i wish silvera had left this part out and went straight to the part that he’d snuck into the vault, because the bit about him remembering his life before he was born was just so extremely unnecessary and takes the surprise from the actual reveal. - the OVER DESCRIBING. its good to build an atmosphere for readers but at a certain point, we don’t need to hear more about every nook and cranny of a private jet or penthouse.
the best (or maybe worst) part of it all is that i probably am going to read the sequel when it comes out as well, even though i haven’t rated a single book of this series above 3 stars yet. i hate that the secret is being dragged on for so long and i hate that im going to read more just to know it. ---------------------------------- preread: no way its the kids from the first to die at the end 😭
edit: yeah yeah i’ve heard you people talk about this book is actually good and the author shouldn’t have to hold your hand to talk about difficult topics etc etc but at the end of the day this book is marketed as a YOUNG ADULT QUEER ROMANCE. THE TARGET AUDIENCE OF THIS BOOK IS VULNERABLE TEENAGERS, AND THE ARC IS MARKETED AS A ROMANCE, NOT A TOXIC CODEPENDENCY. so my opinion that this book was dangerously written and is a shit book still stands, go cry about it. - so, so, SO fucking disappointed in this one. buckle up. (trigger warnings for suicide obviously)
first and foremost, i think what adam silvera was trying to do here was write a book where a suicidal kid could feel like they had an outlet. while i appreciate the sentiment, it was done in a horribly disastrous and irresponsible way, and i cannot believe this dumpster fire got the green light. the only trigger warning given is that a suicide is depicted in the text… let me tell you now: if you have the even the SLIGHTEST little itty bit of suicidal ideation, 1) i’m so happy that you’re still here and you deserve to be here, NO MATTER WHAT YOU THINK and 2) AVOID THIS BOOK LIKE THE FUCKING PLAGUE. a majority of this book, while i believe was written with good intentions, really feels like it is trying too hard to justify the (INCORRECT) beliefs of a suicidal person and i’m just too damn scared that a mentally ill teen could read the first 30% of this book or so, go “yeah i agree!” and then off themselves. the adults and therapists in this book are entirely unhelpful and do virtually nothing to let the depressed teen reading this know that LIFE IS ACTUALLY WORTH LIVING, THERE ARE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE THAT LOVE YOU, PLEASE REACH OUT FOR HELP.
i also want to touch on the way that BPD was represented in this book because OH MY GOD THAT WAS A FUCKING MESS. long story short- our main man paz is diagnosed with BPD by his therapist during the events of this book, and BPD is basically used as a synonym for suicidal in this book which was a WILDLY dangerous and stigmatic choice and i cannot believe silvera was not advised against doing that, or maybe he was and he didn’t give a fuck. ultimately, paz basically determines that our other main man alano is the cure to his BPD after knowing him for approx 36 hours (which is honestly pretty accurate for the disorder, cause it’s a DIS ORDER) and like it is never portrayed in the book that this attachment type is like super not okay? like this symptom of a MENTAL DIS ORDER was straight up romanticized it was so icky!!!
i’m also super concerned for the next book in this installment which is confirmed to continue paz & alano’s story… you have two mentally ill teens with very little interest in getting real psychological help from professionals who decide whether or not they’re suicidal based on the last way the other glanced at them- i do not see this pattern changing in the next book (and honestly this doesn’t change without THERAPY, but fuck it, we gotta figure out how death-cast works, nobody wants to read about rehab i guess!) so we’re gonna have another full length novel romanticizing mental illness and borderline romanticizing suicide (IM VERY AWARE THIS WAS NOT YOUR INTENTION MR SILVERA BUT OH MY GOD YOU DID THIS SO POORLY)
AND ONE MORE THING- we don’t find out how death-cast “works” in this novel but i am really annoyed by the back and forth. everyone in this universe insists that death cast is never wrong, so if you don’t get a call and decide to put a bullet in your brain i guess you survive somehow, because death cast knows you do not die that day and death cast is right! but if you DO get a call from death-cast and let people know that it is your end day, you actually get put in JEOPARDY of dying earlier than you are “supposed to” so death cast can actually be wrong, or at the very least, inaccurate??? CAN PEOPLE INFLUENCE HOW SOMEONE ELSE IS GOING TO DIE OR NOT!!! YOU CAN’T HAVE BOTH!! PICK ONE!!!
i think that’s it. yes i will read the next book because i gotta see what mr silvera comes up with on how this whole god damn thing works. but seriously if you’re depressed or going through a rough patch or are thinking of killing yourself please put the book down and go read the midnight library or remarkably bright creatures or something and know that at least i still want you here.
Adam Silvera, you will be receiving an invoice from my therapist.
The story is sprawling. The narration is introspective. The characters (including the side characters) are complex and imperfect. It's everything I want in a book, and as usual, Adam delivered.
For me, The First to Die at the End blew They Both Die at the End out of the water. The chemistry between Valentino and Orion was palpable, and the trajectory of their relationship was beautiful. Book 1 left me in tears. Book 2 had me sobbing. This third one had me in absolute ruins.
Adam Silvera books have always made me cry when I reach the final page — The Survivor Wants to Die at the End, however, had me in tears at multiple points throughout its 700 pages. I lost count.
This was an emotional challenge because the entire length of the book centers around the topic of suicide — and not in passing. There are numerous passages that describe, in detail, self-h*rm. (There are also descriptions of past suicide attempts and involuntary hospitalization.) These passages were visceral and they transcend “sad.” They are devastating and searing. They felt so real — so please be forewarned.
I love Paz and Alano — they are 2 of Adam's best characters. Over the course of spending 700 pages with them, we have nothing but time to grow attached to them and really feel their pain — and their joy. When they were in pain, so was I. When they had glimpses of happiness, so did I. This is one of the hallmarks of a talented author — you feel what the characters feel.
We also got great insight on mental illness, toxic friendships, trauma, and substance use. And how often, all of those things interact with one another.
For anyone who says reading isn't political, you're wrong. And this book is a testament to the fact that it is. In the current climate, the commentary on political extremists, scapegoating, and propaganda felt topical and truthful. It added another layer to the story and the overall meaning of the book, and it didn't feel forced.
Now. Let's talk about BPD. As someone who has spent years working with people with borderline personality disorder, the depiction of it felt genuine and nuanced. There was just the right amount of explanation without information dumping. After the initial description of BPD by Paz’s therapist, the information comes organically. Certain aspects and symptoms of BPD were touched upon when it felt natural. Furthermore, the book was a proponent of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), and providing information about that felt incredibly important.
Overall, this is one of Adam's strongest books to date, and the best in the Death-Cast universe. It is emotional, gripping, and so very human. I don’t know how I’m expected to wait for the follow-up when my heart is still racing from the ending. 700 pages wasn’t enough with these 2 boys who deserve all the love in the world.
Thank you, Adam — for yet another home run of a book that has left a lasting impression on me.
—
"It only feels this raw right now, lost in the labyrinth of mind. / I thought the plane was going down; how'd you turn it right around?" - Labyrinth x Taylor Swift
"They told me all of my cages were mental, so I got wasted like all my potential. / I just wanted you to know that this is me trying." this is me trying x Taylor Swift
—
Note:
I have seen some reviews mention that the book's depiction of BPD is "irresponsible" and "incorrect" — when in actuality, it did not feel disingenuous or ill-informed at all. For all we know, authors who choose to write about certain subjects are writing about said subjects from their own personal experience.
If you don't have BPD, you really aren't entitled to critique how others experience it. If you have friends, family, partners, etc. with the disorder, you can absolutely speak on how mental health disorders can impact loved ones — which is an imperative aspect of talking about mental health — but you are NOT allowed to critique how it feels to experience it.
—
And another thing. I’ve seen complaints about the book being “too long” (often from people who haven’t even read it yet). To which I say …
1.) You don’t have to read it.
2.) Pages in Adam Silvera books have less text on them than other books.
3.) I think using 700 pages to explore incredibly sensitive topics and to really delve into how complex BPD, suicide, and self-harm are … is very reasonable.
tldr: Adam Silvera made this book so fucking big so he can absolutely beat the shit outta his dead horse with it.
I'm sorry but I'm too old and grown to be condoning such intense codependent relationships between mentally ill people. I've lived it. it's not h e a l t h y. this wasn't romantic, it was just sad and immature. at my age I'm calling the authorities if someone is gonna be suicidal to me like this. the power of gay love can't magically fix chemical imbalances and trauma of a brain. I would've been better off just cracking open my journal from middle school if I wanted to read about codependent mentally ill people who want to self harm every two pages. I'm not necessarily triggered by the topics and themes this book discussed but I don't think it was done in a proper way and I think the depictions of self harm were too much for a young adult novel. there's so many little things I could get into about this but I've wasted enough of my time. heed the trigger warnings, stay safe loves.
I'm not sure where to begin. First of all, I'm so so so incredibly grateful for having won the giveaway for this book. Sadly, this book was a big miss for me. I loved the first two books and was so excited for this one, but unfortunately it just didn't deliver.
The writing in this book was honestly kind of bad? I kept rolling my eyes and literally laughing out loud because some things were just so ridiculous. Within the first few pages, 19 year old Paz is having some internal monologue and says . It was just so random, bad, laughable, and it felt like some middle schooler being melodramatic. Again, this was just a few pages in and with that I just knew this book wouldn't be serious. Another example: the mom tells Paz that I'm sorry but what?? What kind of mom would say that?? A lot of these characters and the things they say just seem so ridiculous, unbelievable, and childish. I'm sure me as a middle schooler or high schooler would've loved this, but I just couldn't take any of it seriously.
The exposition was LONG. I noted down being 118 pages into the book and not enough had happened. And the exposition was still being developed at that point. Yikes.
The whole book was insanely long. Unnecessarily and unbearably so. Every little thing is described with so much detail that it sucked me out of the story. Like let's get this show on road!! I glazed over so many paragraphs and entire pages because I was so annoyed and bored at times. I don't remember the first two books being like this at all. The book could've easily been half as long in my opinion.
Everything is so cheesy. Some stuff I let slide because it was cute, but everything is just so cheesy. I know this whole series is about insta-love, but this book took the cheesiness to the next level.
Most characters in this book are jerks? Paz is a jerk sometimes, Alano's dad is a jerk, Paz's best friends are jerks, Paz's best friend's mom is a jerk, etc. It was just annoying that it's hard to find characters to like in this story. Alano is one of the few likeable characters, but that's only because he's a perfect character. He's 19 but has the emotional intelligence of a wise adult. Anytime Paz does or says something, Alano has the perfect reply, the perfect solution, a whole psychological lesson for Paz (and for the reader), and he's always so understanding, so caring, so loving. He's too perfect. He honestly sounds the way ChatGPT talks. Super smart, super wise, always comforting, always supportive, always having the perfect thing to say. It's unrealistic. It's pretty much like Nick and Charlie from Heartstopper. And it works in Heartstopper because the whole comic is meant to be cutesy and sappy, but this book isn't that.
In my opinion Alano should
I think my biggest issue with the book is that I barely cried. I teared up a few pages into the book, and several times throughout it. This made me excited because I just knew something really raw and cry-worthy would happen at the end (like it does in the other 2 books), and then ... nothing. NOTHING!!! I couldn't believe it. I finished the book and was so confused. Where are my tears?? I was ready to cry whether from heartbreak or joy, and nothing happened!!! I threw the book when I finished it because I was so annoyed with it.
The book ends in a cliffhanger. This irritated me so much. What do you mean I just spent all this time reading 700 pages for the story to continue in a future book. Seriously?? This book was already too long and now I have to read even more to find out what happens?? Annoying.
Alano's This book isn't sci-fi but I had to suspend my belief so much to get through it because nothing is realistic.
Speaking of things lacking realism, Alano's
I can't relate to Paz and his mental struggles, so what I'm going to say next might be wrong and I'm willing to admit that and learn, but he came across as some angsty, immature, whiny, annoying kid instead of a 19 year old with suicidal ideation. When you watch 13 Reasons Why, you really feel the main character's emotions and struggles, and as the viewer your heart aches with each horrible thing that happens to her. With Paz, I never got that. I don't mean to undermine this character's feelings and emotions at all, especially since I don't know what it's like to be in shoes like his, but it was just a bit hard to believe and to feel what he was feeling. Again, it just felt like a melodramatic character being annoying instead of a character that was constantly hurting.
This book tried really hard to be something like The Midnight Library. I devoured that book and felt the main character's emotions. In that book, you hurt with her, you root for her, you want her to live. You get to be in her shoes and sort of understand her struggles with her own suicidal episode. You learn about the beauty in living in that book. This book tries to do the same, but unfortunately it doesn't. At least for me it really missed the mark on that.
Unfortunately this book was just not it for me :/ It was long, it was insanely cheesy and hard to believe, it ends in a cliffhanger, it doesn't make you cry like the other two books. You have to read this if you enjoy this series, but don't expect a book of the same caliber as the first two.
⟡ 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 i fell in love with this universe a long time ago. i have no words for this masterpiece — it was different than the other books in the series, for reasons i won‘t be elaborating on (because of spoilers). but what i can say is that i rarely ever encounter stories this beautiful and deep.
i‘m glad the romance developed so slowly. it fit the characters and their current state of mind perfectly. otherwise i would have been afraid of something like a co-dependent relationship forming.
i loved the little hints to the previous books (orion‘s book, lydia, mattheo‘s dad). made my heart break (in a good way?).
⟡ 𝗽𝗮���� i hurt with him while reading this. i enjoyed his chapters the most because i feel like his character has so much detail. being in his head was unsettlingly relatable and reading about his thoughts made me so sad i teared up several times. what became of the innocent, starry-eyed kid? life can be such a tragedy. he deserved so much better. i really hoped at the end of “the first to die at the end“ he‘d be getting more of a happy ending. but i guess then we wouldn‘t have gotten this book.
⟡ 𝗮𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗼 for most of the book, i thought of him as the optimistic dreamer who carries enough love and hope for the world in his heart to save a boy from jumping to death. but at some point, it becomes clear that he, of course, has his own trauma and struggles too. he‘s not some holy savior. he‘s just as haunted as paz. i‘m so glad they got each other to heal.
my heart broke over and over again for those too. the ending was soo mean. i cannot wait for the next book to come out and rip my heart out once more
જ⁀➴🪐༘⋆ 𝒑𝒓𝒆-𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅:
may 6 this came out today, can‘t wait to start it!! also, the title? do you want me to cry, adam silvera?? (because i will, most probably.) and why does it have 700+ pages — i already know i‘ll get overly attached to these characters, no need to hurt me this much yk :(
Ohhhh Alano and Pazito. I want to protect you both with my whole freaking heart.
Okay so I read and loved this already, as you know. But I HAD to listen to the audio and let me tell you. Experiencing this story on audio is an absolute MUST. My jaw still dropped. I still laughed and cried and wanted to hug Paz and Alano.
@sexytosomeppl crushes Paz’s narration and embodies the character so well I was weeping several times. The *emotion* in his voice!!!! The yawning. The giggles. The tears. I was so choked up. @anthonyreyperez truly stuns as Alano, bringing the quiet steady presence throughout the novel. The end??? My heart was aching for Alano and I just *felt* everything through his performance. And that last sentence had me REELING. And of course, @kylark once again showed why she is an absolute audio *queen* with her narration of our other character perspectives and interludes.
How can I narrow down 19 quotes from the book that aren’t super spoiler-y but also show how incredible the writing is?? How gorgeous the prose is? How stunning the story is? @adamsilvera is a true treasure. I cannot wait to reread this book again and again. Feeling so *seen* today. Enjoy the full range of emotions with this one, kids.
Original review: I received this book yesterday and dropped every single other book so I could devour it with my whole heart and soul. No spoilers, and make sure you check content warnings prior to reading. The biggest ones to me are: suicidal ideation, suicidal thoughts, and self-harm.
If you have been following me for the last year or so - you know how much I adore Adam’s writing, and how I read through his entire backlist. I have been just so excited (and nervous!!!) for this book because Adam said it’s his most personal yet.
This series of novels is so incredibly important to me. Such an interesting concept, and how different the perspectives are. As someone intimately acquainted with grief from a young age, Adam’s novels pull me in.
I just finished my reread of They Both Die at the End and The First to Die at the End, and so many characters and situations make cameos in this book. It was exciting and sad to see them in this book because I loved them so much and it was like a gut check (in a good way!) every time.
Paz and Alano are characters who are flawed and messy and so real. I kept having to remember they were not real people, but I felt like I knew them. I annotated this one and there were so many moments where I related so deeply to Paz and/or Alano that my chest hurt. While I haven’t self harmed, I have definitely had suicidal thoughts and ideations in my past. The incredible feelings of lonliness and feeling like things will never get better. There’s a scene with Rolando, Paz, and Gloria where Paz says something about needing things to be better now and it hit me pretty hard, I had to step away for a minute.
I feel so connected to this work. For someone to put *my* thoughts on paper. To know I’m not alone. To know people do love me and care. I also highlighted something where I just felt like Adam came through so intimately that it brought me to tears.
Paz and Alano really are everything to me, and I know I will revisit this book again and again. I’m already planning my reread on audio (hurry up Tuesday) and of course my other versions.
@adamsilvera in case I can’t speak on Thursday because I’m too excited and nervous - thank you for seeing me.
The book started out fine but once Paz and Alano meet is when the book started going downhill real fast. Paz attempts to kill himself and is saved by Alano and they end up spending the next 3 hours together with Alano trying to convince Paz to not kill himself. By the end of the hang out Paz is convinced that he should live for Alano which is not healthy…
Moving on to the next day where they plan to meet again and wow the amount of times I cringed from how corny the MCs got… Alano should not have been encouraging all this flirting between them, Paz is not in the right head space to be committed in a relationship. By the end of the night they were already about to kiss but got interrupted and it hadn’t even been 24 hours since Paz tried to kill himself.
Alano in his head then says, “I still don’t believe in love at first sight, but I do believe it’s possible to fall for someone in one day”. These TWO meetings have just been to try to get Paz to not want to kill himself and continue living, how was there any room for romantic love? I can see why Paz fell in love quickly because of his borderline personality disorder but Alano? Alano has been in love with his best friend Rio for some time now and they’ve hooked up but Rio didn’t want to get in a relationship which Alano accepted but he still had feelings for him. So I just don’t understand how these feelings quickly diminished once he met Paz.
Throughout the book Paz and Alano in their heads will say how they’re each other’s future and how they’re basically soulmates in love and it’s just so ridiculous that I couldn’t take the book seriously anymore despite the heavy topics this book covers.
Paz ended up being too dependent on Alano. He was always so insecure and Alano always had to come and rescue him from his thoughts.
Towards the end Alano tries to kill himself but Paz threatens to kill himself too and Paz confesses he loves him and kisses him and that’s enough for Alano to not want to kill himself. I was so done with this story already and that whole scene only further soured my experience with this book.
This story would have been a whole lot better had they scrapped the whole romance aspect, it would have also saved us half of the book(should not have been 700 pages🙄). And if the author still wanted to include romance it should not have been shoved in our faces from the moment they met. It also shouldn’t have been so extreme that it was codependent.
The answer to suicidal ideation is not romance.
There is still sooo much to talk about the problems in this book but I would be here all day😮💨
Adam Silvera needs to stay away from all those yes men that approved of this story😬
THAT CLIFFHANGER. ABSOLUTELY EVIL. WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL 2026 TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.
anyway. THE SURVIVOR WANTS TO DIE AT THE END is probably the heaviest book of the entire death-cast series. oddly, it’s the only one i didn’t cry while reading. there were some lines that were so deeply heartbreaking i had to put the book down, but it was balanced out with what i think might be the best romance adam silvera has ever written. and maybe, hopefully, the first one in this series that gets a happy ending.
i don’t know if i’m misremembering the other two books, but the writing felt much less polished than it was before? it just wasn’t as enjoyable as the other two books, which i five-starred. either way, though, this novel is incredibly addictive and emotional.
I think I’m a little bit crazy for starting a 707 pages book near the ending of the year. *lol* But I put “The Survivor Wants to Die at the End” on my 2025 TBR so here we are!
I’m pretty certain the story of Alano and Paz is going to destroy me, but the fact that there will come a second book and that those two characters will actually get to know each other is so intriguing. In the other books of this series there was always a time limit, but in here everything seems to be possible! I’m pumped!
Be gentle with my poor heart, Adam! =)
P.S: This cover is amazing!!! The skull moon and the grim reaper shadow!!! I love it! <3
Este libro es HEAVY. Por favor, consulten las advertencias de contenido antes de leer este libro. Hay mucho material sensible: recopilé algunos que pondré aqui por si quieren estar precavidos (si no quisieran enterarse, saltense esta parte que está resaltada en negritas: ideación suicida, intento de asesinato, intento de suicidio, suicidio, autolesiones gráficas, mención de sobredosis, trastorno de límite de la personalidad, discusiones sobre la muerte, muerte, violencia física, temas relacionados a la salud mental.
Ay gente, no se que pensar. No puedo decir que estaba enormemente emocionado por este libro porque el universo de Al Final Mueren los Dos no es mi favorito, pero quiero mucho al autor entonces aún asi le tenía muchas ganas. Disfruté del libro, pero en definitiva es el que menos me ha gustado de los tres, y con el que más problemas tuve.
Quiero empezar diciendo que la historia de Paz y de Alano no escatima en cuanto detalles sobre su pasado, y su sufrimiento actual. Puede que haya tenido problemas con el desarrollo de la novela, pero eso no quita la empatía inmensa que siento por ambos. Entiendo su dolor, el porque de sus acciones, su pesar, y la necesidad de que alguien les de una oportunidad. No puedo hablar como tal de la representación dado que, como nunca la he vivido, no puedo determinar si es buena o no, pero puedo decir que se nota que el autor tuvo consideración en mostrar la realidad de estos dos, por más cruda que sea. Es un libro sobre la esperanza al final del día, y aunque su representación es mínima, estan los primeros rayos para estos personajes, y espero que después de tanto sufrimiento puedan encontrar consuelo en el futuro.
However, mis conflictos con la historia fueron enormes. Muchos de ellos recaen completamente en la manera en la que el autor decidió llevar este nuevo capítulo dentro del universo de Death Cast.
Uno de los problemas que he notado con Adams Silvera y sus libros es que a él le encanta decir más no mostrar. Este libro es el claro ejemplo de ello, ya que opta por repetir información una y otra vez para hacerle entender al lector lo que quiere decir en vez de mostrártelo. Me parece raro, ya que me da la impresión que, entonces, no confia lo suficiente en que sus lectores sean capaces de entender matices. ¿El resultado? 700 páginas de exceso de información y redundancia. No les voy a mentir, llegó un punto donde me abrumaba estar leyendo lo mismo y lo mismo y lo mismo. Se pudo haber recortado este libro enormemente si tal vez un editor hubiera comentado esto. El punto es más que entendible, desde las primeras páginas captas perfectamente la dinamica y el psique de lo protagonistas. Repetir lo mismo párrafo tras párrafo me parece más una excusa para escribir un libro largo.
En general, el romance en estos libros nunca me ha gustado, porque siempre se presta al instalove por la naturaleza de estas historias, pero en particular con este libro creo que el romance es MUY innecesario. Aparte de que todo sucede más rápido, hay ciertas connotaciones en la historia que hacen que la relación amorosa entre Paz y Alano se sienta, hasta cierto punto, incorrecta. No creo que la situación de ambos permita un romance, porque no creo que la manera en la que lo manejó el autor haya sido buena. Creo firmemente que este libro pudo haber funcionado mil veces mejor si hubiera sido una relación platónica. Tiene mucho más sentido que los personajes encontrasen amistad el uno en el otro más que amor romántico, porque genuinamente no siento que sean buenos el uno para el otro.
Y lo siguiente es más problema mio con esta serie, pero hay ocaciones donde siento que roza lo ridículo. Tanto en la narrativa del autor como en las situaciones que plasma, hay momentos donde todo se siente demasiado out of the box , como en este caso fue el final del libro. Adam mencionó que era el giro más grande que habia escrito y que cambiaba todo pero, honestamente, el planteamiento de este es hilarante, cruzando lo descabellado. Es tan absurdo que me es imposible tomarlo en serio, y estoy seguro que esa no es la intención del autor. Lo que me deja conflictuado: ¿que tanto puedo confiar en que el siguiente libro vaya a cerrar la historia de manera buena? ¿Después de esta revelación, que significa para el resto de la serie? No estoy seguro si incluso Adam esta totalmente seguro de a donde llevar su historia.
Que esa es otra cosa. A diferencia de los dos anteriores, este libro no termina de manera cerrada. Es más que claro que "No One Knows Who Dies at the End" será secuela directa de este; y como este es el que menos me ha gustado de los tres, tiene mi desarrollo menos favorito y la pareja que menos me ha convencido, mis expectativas estan por el suelo.
I really enjoyed the first two books in this series but TSWTDATE just felt like a franchise milker AND it ends on a cliffhanger after being over 700 pages.
I get that this is technically YA and as an almost 30 year old, I'm not exactly the target audience anymore but there was just so many things wrong with this book and I can't tell if it felt wrong because I'm getting older or if the book was actually just BAD.
Paz's depiction of BPD felt like his entire personality and it was poorly written to boot. Silvera basically boils down BPD to depression and suicidal ideations. It's completely one dimensional. Paz "I'm a killer, Bella"s all over the plot, and while I get that social media does have a tendency to take sides and potentially villainize people, I find it a bit crazy that his entire life was "ruined" over killing his abusive father.
Also his level of stardom sort of was unclear to me/weirdly written. Not that I think that actors are superrrrr rich right away but it felt contradictory to describe Paz as the Next Big Thing and then have him feeling sad that his family/mother is so poor that she had to eat a day old salad.
Then there's Alano. I thought that him having a "superpower" and being seconds away from a psychotic break came off as Silvera wanting to give Alano some type of mental health condition because it would "pair" well with Paz and his issues. His "superpower" is silly and his psychotic break added nothing to the plot. Alano implies/starts to say that him having a Master Memory could make him a target of his father's competitors... but this book specifically doesn't really go anywhere with that.
Alano also becomes Paz's "cure" to his BPD when his (Alano's) only knowledge of BPD was google. That didn't sit right to me. The whole "I'm an adult, I know better than you! You wouldn't understand!" attitude did feel true to something that I think the target audience would agree with, but that doesn't mean it's a good depiction or well-written. It just means it's relatable for teens. I think this perspective/attitude should've been used on something else, not on discussions on (how to treat/address) mental health.
I liked the prequel because it did add to a bit of the lore to Death Cast, but this book and the potential sequel is not necessary. Paz and Alano simply are not charming enough characters. If that book is another 500+ pages... I can't even imagine what could happen in it, because nothing really even happened here!
The book repeatedly teases that there's a secret to Death Cast and does not tell us what that secret is. Again, this book is over 700 pages.
TSWTDATE boils down to: Alano saves Paz from killing himself. Alano and Paz both have conflicts with their parents. That's about it. There really is no "development" in this book to be had, except how Paz decides to live because of Alano. Oh, and it turns out that Alano and Paz were . How they remember that so vividly is beyond me.
Knowing that neither of the characters die at the end (which was the initial basis of this series, imo), I was incredibly tempted to DNF but I purchased a physical copy so I had to force myself to finish.
There was a lot of potential with the political angle of this book. I particularly liked how secretive the company is and how reporters/journalists try to get the scoop on who's going to die. It just takes a massive backburner to the lackluster romance and questionable depiction of mental health. Like, we had a perfect reason to learn more about Death Cast being that we follow Alano. Issue is, Silvera wastes it.
TSWTDATE was disappointing to say the least. And I will not be reading the sequel.
start date: 2025, may the 6th end date: 2025, may the 7th [at 3am]
did i really read this in twenty-four hours? ...yeah. did i stay up late just to finish this book? ...yeah. would i say that this book will make your heart shatter? ...yeah.
this book broke me. this book focuses on mental health [specifically self harm and s__cide], trust and friendship. i loved how paz and alano's friendship and the problems that came in their way. i think that this book displayed the mental health problems in a realistic way, and i hope that other books that revolve around mental health would be released soon.
when i said that this book broke me, it did. the ending made me cry at 3am, and i was sobbing like shit throughout the whole book. since this book was just released, i will not spoil that much.
fucking love this book. can't wait for no one knows who dies at the end.
[2025, may the 23rd] OH MY DAYS BARNES AND NOBLE EDITION IS RIGHT IN MY HANDS. i'm crying. waited for four months. i took 35 minutes to read the short story that came along with it. let me just say that, i haven't even finished reading the first paragraph, and i'm already crying. it was hard to read the book because my vision is blurred with tears. at some point, i even took a ten-second breather, and at one point, even took my jacket. god, while everyone is complaining about the fact that it's so hot even the sun looks like it's going to explode like a bomb filled with piping-hot magma, i was sitting there, shivering. i cannot stop rambling about how this book hurts me so much, and seeing orion made me cry. hearing about valentino made me cry. this book made me cry so much, and seventeen days later, i already want to reread this book again. i don't care that this book's over 700 pages, this book is one of the most relatable ones. it has become my comfort book. it has been a while since i've celebrated my birthday, so i bought this book as a present to make up for the birthdays i'll never cherish. i didn't do so well for a while. and reading this book really related to me so much. i'm better now, and i will not die at the end of today. i will live just to get the next book. death-cast will never call me, until this series ends.
(An important disclaimer: I don't feel that this book represents different types of mental illnesses well, and I think the representation is overwhelmingly dark and traumatic especially for a YA book. I know this wasn't the intention at all, but I think this book would be harmful to anyone struggling. Please, please, please avoid this book if you struggle with suicidal thoughts/ideation and/or self-harm, this book will be immensely triggering. I don't want to write a full review, however I do want to add that I think the relationship in this book is highly co-dependent and is never treated as such within the text. Between this and History Is All You Left Me I've found Silvera's well-intentioned writing about mental health to be incredibly heavy-handed and overly triggering in ways I feel goes against what their stories try to accomplish. I understand wholeheartedly the importance of awareness and of wanting to be seen, but that demands intelligent and capable storytelling, awareness of negative stereotypes and the intention of actively subverting them, and awareness of nuance and depth of the illnesses and disorders depicted. I'm afraid I don't believe that these books accomplish this.)
this is a novel that aims for emotional resonance and high-stakes introspection, yet lands (at least for me) in a space that is compelling but uneven. it carries all the hallmarks of Adam Silvera’s style: characters shaped by grief, futures charged with uncertainty and a plot built around the tension between survival and surrender. still, despite the weight of its themes and the sincerity of its intentions, the book doesn’t fully reach the emotional impact it seems to be striving for, which ultimately aligns with my 3-star experience.
the character work is both the novel’s strongest and most inconsistent element. the protagonist is crafted with a clear sense of vulnerability, his inner conflicts sharply drawn and often deeply affecting. the writer excels at portraying young people who feel trapped between the desire to keep going and the exhaustion of living and that talent certainly shows here. however, the supporting cast does not always receive the same care. some characters feel richly imagined, with motivations that unfold gradually and believably, while others seem to move through the story without the depth or nuance that would make their contributions feel essential. this unevenness occasionally leaves the emotional dynamics feeling lopsided, as though the protagonist is carrying more narrative weight than the story can comfortably balance.
the plot is similarly complex in intention and mixed in execution. at its best, it offers a fascinating examination of choice, consequence and the looming presence of fate. there are moments when the narrative tightens beautifully, especially when the protagonist’s interactions, discoveries or moments of self-doubt illuminate the fragile line between wanting to live and wanting release. these sections are powerful, reflective and immersive. yet at other times, the pacing falters, stretching certain emotional beats too thin while rushing through others that would have benefited from deeper exploration. the central conflict remains intriguing throughout, but the structure surrounding it can feel fragmented, as if the story is constantly searching for a balance it never quite maintains.
still, the novel’s thematic ambition is undeniable. it tackles mortality, agency and the complicated process of healing with a rawness that is often admirable. there are passages that feel painfully honest, moments when the narrative looks directly at the messy reality of trying to move forward when the future feels unbearable, but alongside these powerful scenes, there are stretches where the emotional repetition becomes a little too heavy-handed, blunting rather than sharpening the impact.
ultimately, The Survivor Wants to Die at the End is a novel that contains flashes of brilliance: striking character moments, beautifully phrased introspection and a few plot turns that genuinely deepen the story’s emotional stakes. nevertheless, its uneven pacing and inconsistent character development make it feel less cohesive than it could have been.
This book is so disappointing. The author has no trust in the reader so reiterates the same points over and over and over. Yes we get it he's suicidal yes we get it he has borderline personality. This book honestly reads like a cringe wattpad I wasn't expecting a five-star read but it's a shame because I found the previous books entertaining. The first portion of this book is essentially nothing happening except from Paz whining about how hard his life is.Mental illness is portrayed so badly in this story.
A few cringe quotes from this book- "...so the plant has browned from neglect; I gotta throw it out because I can't watch a plant die before me."
"But I feel most drawn to Alano's t-shirt, which has a graphic of a skeleton smoking a cigarette. It reminds me of killing myself."
"I'm just about to inhale the lit cigarette for my own relief when he smacks it out my hand. "Okay are you trying to get me to reach for the gun?" Despite the death threat, Alano laughs. "I'm trying to keep you alive." "A cigarette won't kill me tonight." " It could in a few years."
I'm not trying to be a hater. If you like this book I'm happy for you! I just think this is a massive step back in quality compared to his previous books.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Considering its size, I went through this one quite quickly.
There are a lot of throwbacks and links to the previous books which were fun (might have been more so if my memory was better 😂)
One suicidal boy desperately waiting for Deathcast to call him and the other heir to a billion dollar company - Deathcast itself.
The pair meet in an unlikely way on the Hollywood sign and from there a romance blossoms. I don’t love the whole “falling in love will cure your mental illness vibe”. But I like both the main characters, both are human and flawed.
I will probably pick up the next book as these are pretty damn readable, but unlikely to keep them for rereads.
i can't even think anymore but ADAM SILVERA WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!! i read this book in one single day because i couldn't put it down and was so scared about the ending AND NOW I HAVE TO WAIT
I have enjoyed the earlier books in the Death Cast series by Silvera, but this latest entry is my least favorite. I find the world of Death Cast to be intriguing and while the atmosphere is dark I found the books to be ultimately hopeful and thought provoking. With "The Survivor Wants to Die at the End", I couldn't quite get my grips around the story.
I didn't glom onto Paz or Alano like I did with Rufus, Mateo, Orion, or Valentino in the previous books. Silvera has mentioned that he really wanted to focus on mental health with this addition and he kind of succeeds. I only wished that the therapist scenes and talking of therapy were more on the forefront. The plot dangerously leans more towards "love can heal us". I also wanted a bit more clarity on borderline personality disorder. While the discussion and depiction of mental health struggles are important, this book felt too dark. I needed more lighter moments to even it out.
I also thought the pacing of the story was off. Time on the important aspects of understanding Paz's mental health issues are cut short, but we are given long passages of nonessential flashbacks or happenings at Death Cast. This book did not have to be 700+ pages long and the story really suffers because of its length. It's not until the 20-30% mark that Paz and Alano meet. While I wasn't that critical of the insta-romance in the other books because I thought the characters' connections were so strong and developed well, it definitely turned me off in this book. It happened way too quickly.
Unfortunately, my streak of disappointing anticipated reads in YA seems to continue.
Adam Silvera deserves the biggest hug because this series has truly made me cry. I love getting more insight into how Death-Cast works and the political, ethical and moral dilemmas it raises.
How would our society function if Death-Cast was real? Would you sign up for it? So many possibilities…
Please read the first three paragraphs of my review if you're thinking of reading the book. FUTURE READERS, PLEASE READ THIS: MY GOODNESS. This book was...a lot. First of all, this book contains some very heavy content. I had to skip several scenes, and don't be ashamed if you have to as well. Take care of yourself first. There's a trigger warning in the front of the book - read it before starting the book. TSWTDATE was very difficult to read, and I'm sure it's even more difficult for people struggling with suicidal thoughts to read. The trigger warning is helpful, but I wouldn't say it's quite enough. We are in Paz's head as he self-harms (graphically - I skipped that part) and strongly considers and plans suicide, even attempting it several times. I skipped/skimmed a lot of scenes because of how intense this is. Please make sure you're okay before reading this book. I wasn't prepared for how intense this would be. The first part of the book was very difficult to read, and it seemed to get easier even though those heavy moments were still present. I understand now why it got easier to read - I was dissociating. I couldn't put myself emotionally in the story because it was so hard to read. Please be careful. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and don't feel obligated to read the book because you've read the others. Your safety comes first. REST OF REVIEW: So many plot twists! I can't say much because I don't want to spoil it, but the last few chapters are WOW. And the cliffhanger is crazy. This book was LONG. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it being so long - I wish it was longer! It definitely keeps you captivated for all...let me count...707 pages. So know this will take a while to read. Paz and Alano are brilliant characters. It was so weird seeing them in their late teens when they were nine in the last book! Crazy. This book doesn't focus on the love story as much as the other books do, but it was sweet anyway. I don't even know what to say now. I'll probably have more helpful comments when it's been more than ten minutes since I finished the book. This book is amazing! Read it! I would recommend reading this series in the same order they came out: TBDATE, TFTDATE, then TSWTDATE. Okay, back again after 7 minutes. This book is amazing, but it also had some issues. Suicide was somewhat romanticized in one of the last scenes, and as another reviewer pointed out, BPD is treated as a synonym for suicidal. Also, I love how the boys are helping each other, but they really need professional help, especially Paz. The adults in this book point this out a few times - Alano is not a mental health professional and the two of them are so close to death in so many scenes. It's terrifying and heartbreaking to read. They really need help. But maybe they'll get it in the next book, idk. Still 5 stars for all the amazing stuff, but this book does make mistakes. One last thing - this line, on page 334: "This system is broken when a man can commit a crime and still qualify for the presidency." NOTE: Mike's comment below doesn't make sense now, but this review used to be a summary of which Death-Cast books were which. (and I got it wrong, so Mike corrected me. Thanks, Mike!)
This. Was a rough read. Struggled a lot more with this one than the others. I was so nervous picking it up. And actually reading the whole thing. Made it to page 257 before tearing up and having to throw the book down. The dinner scene caused me soooooo much anxiety oh my god. Oh no no no no no page 627 oh no oh no oh NO.
Actually. Nah? This was a let down.
“This system is broken when a man can commit a crime and still qualify for the presidency.” - 👀👀👀👀👀
Book 1: amazing. Book 2: eh, like lukewarm tea. Book 3: fine, but now it's like that TV show you keep watching even though it peaked already. And now they tell me there’s a Book 4?? Send help. (But also yes, I’ll read it.)