Polar Vortex: A Family Memoir

by Denise Dorrance

For fans of Can’t We Talk About Something More Pleasant? , an unputdownable debut graphic The what-fresh-hell story of two whirlwind months in the life of the author, when she suddenly has to care for her dementia-impaired mother, whose last home she urgently needs to find When Denise Dorrance’s elderly mother is discovered confused on the floor of her Iowa home, Denise catches the first flight from London and arrives having to organize her immediate care. As her mother experiences the swirling confusion of dementia, hospitalized with the insurance running out, Denise wrestles with childhood memories and a toxic relationship with her sister. Pressure mounts after their mother is abruptly discharged and critical decisions must be made about her future―all as a classic Midwestern polar vortex sweeps through. In a cinematic style of flowing illustrations that incorporate vintage postcards, photos, and letters, Dorrance brilliantly captures the sadness, frustration, and gallows humor of a situation known to suddenly having to care for an aging parent who’s no longer able to live independently, with no good options for what comes next. Polar Vortex compassionately, poignantly, and humorously captures the moment of transition between life as we’ve long known it and life as it must become. Graphic novel

Genres: Graphic Novels, Memoir, Nonfiction, Comics, Adult, Biography, Biography Memoir

256 pages, Paperback

Published March 5, 2024

Reviews

[Elizabeth A · Rating 5 out of 5]

Blurb: The what-fresh-hell story of two whirlwind months in the life of the author, when she suddenly has to care for her dementia-impaired mother.

This debut graphic memoir wonderfully captures the heartbreak of aging parents and the complex emotions that accompany that stage in life. I really liked the illustration style and the exploration of themes in this particular, yet universal, tale.

[Rod Brown · Rating 3 out of 5]

A daughter rushes home to Cedar Rapids, Iowa, when her elderly mother is injured by a fall in the home where she lives alone and exhibits symptoms of dementia during her hospital stay. What follows is a heartbreaking sink into a morass of assisted living, insurance rigmarole, and family conflict between estranged siblings over care decisions and property.

It's fairly engrossing, but Denise Dorrance portrays herself in such a negative light it becomes harder to maintain sympathy as the tale progresses. First up, she's been living in England for thirty years, and despite being from Iowa she has adopted an English accent that everyone remarks upon throughout the story, bringing up those connotations of appropriation personified by Madonna and Hilaria Baldwin. Dorrance also dwells a lot on her narcissistic concerns about having to help her mother and presents a very one-sided portrait of the sister with whom she has fallen out. Finally, she portrays herself driving intoxicated in a climactic scene.

Despite the above, Dorrance is a relatable narrator going through a tough time that a lot of people are facing or have already experienced. And her art style and quirky celebrity cameos keep the story lively even in the face of overwhelming gloom.

[The Flying Fox · Rating 5 out of 5]

This biography of Denise Dorrance is the first graphic novel on this year’s release list that I wanted to read, particularly due to its themes of mental illness and grief. And I’m not necessarily referring to, or not only to, the grief that comes with someone’s physical death but to the grief that arises from the loss of an expectation or when someone is no longer who we hoped they would be.

For me, Denise was brilliant in the way she tackled these issues. In addition to addressing them intimately, she wasn’t afraid to reveal the instinctive, deeply comic, or ironic thoughts that come to us in the most tragic situations and at the most inopportune moments.

The artwork is very engaging, not only because it doesn’t necessarily follow the conventional panel format, being freer in that sense, but because it brilliantly uses the arrival of a climatic phenomenon - the polar vortex - to illustrate not only the whirlwind of emotions that engulf her but also the vortex into which the mother descends when overwhelmed by dementia.

Here, the relationships between parents and children, between siblings, grief, and the corruption of the American healthcare system and insurance companies are explored.

[Laura · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love that graphic memoirs are covering all kinds of new ground, including this reflection on dealing with aging parents and disagreeing with siblings about what they need. I’m haunted by the lost look in her mother’s eyes as she moves through the hospital and nursing home.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

The heartbreaking reality of dementia is accurately depicted in this graphic novel, in ways that emotionally resonate with the reader a lot. In particular, the way the eyes of the mother were so sorrowful and confused really emphasized the loss of life she must've felt. I liked how the imagery of snow danced around the mother during her confusion, it was a nice artistic touch.

I couldn't get behind the humor in this book, or the assortment of imaginary characters helping the protagonist process everything, it felt a bit tacky to me. I also felt thrown off by the art style changes like the real pictures throughout, they felt a bit out of place. The ending felt rushed and unfinished.

[karissa✨ · Rating 5 out of 5]

raw & heartbreaking

[el (celestialbronz) · Rating 5 out of 5]

A heartfelt memoir about a mother living with dementia at her old age. The illustration is in doodle-style, completed with real pictures of the memories the mother kept neatly in the basement. The narrative is laced with light humor, and it gave me a perspective about insurance which is kind of wild I think. Can’t believe there’s people benefitting from the future’s uncertainty just to pay them back in dust when the “worst” is actually happening.

Perfect for Dancing at the Pity Party readers.

[Meghan]

Good. I wish there was more. But this was good.

[Kimberly · Rating 4 out of 5]

Recommended by a reading buddy who enjoyed it!!

Denise’s elderly mom falls and is hospitalized, so Denise rushes from London back to her hometown in Iowa around the time of the chilling polar vortex to visit her mom in the hospital and decide on next steps. Her aging mother is struggling with dementia and is moved from the hospital to a care facility while Denise wrestled with whether or not to have her mom move to California to live with Denise’s sister, whom Denise has a rocky relationship with. The work covers the sorrow and nostalgia that comes with helping an elderly parent with dementia, the difficult decisions needed to be made regarding care and finances, and the confusing workings of the US healthcare system. The ending felt abrupt and sad, especially after her mom said she wanted to live in a care home and not be a burden, but it showed me that sometimes we have to make hard decisions. The work did a wonderful job visually displaying the grief and pain the situation often brings, particularly in moments where her mom was confused or did not recognize Denise. I also thought the way death was portrayed as a character waiting, looming, and present was well done. Appreciated the inclusion of photographs, postcards, and letters pasted in and illustrated on/around. Illustrations used a lot of blues, reds, whites, and black, which went along well with the cold weather and with distressing items being emphasized with red. This work covers a sadly common experience with much sensitivity and relatability.

[Estibaliz · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.25

'Polar Vortex' bears the subtitle of 'A Family Memoir', but I would say that's relative, as the story seems to center almost exclusively on Denise's side of the story. And, obviously, with her mom suffering from dementia, that makes sense, but I felt a bit uneasy as the way she depicts her relationship with her sister, which seems quite mean at times... though I guess she deserves praise for being honest and sincere. Family dynamics can be tricky and ugly, indeed.

Apart from that, and that ending that wasn't very satisfactory, but once again, raw and honest, this is a wonderful memoir, that doesn't shy away from the harsh reality of life, when your parents get old and the children have to sometimes make decisions for them and/or turn into their caregivers. And sure enough, and as Denise Dorrance shows aptly here, there is not easy answers or easy decisions...

[Chelsea · Rating 5 out of 5]

A polar vortex is about to hit the Midwest, just in time for a 91 year old matriarch to fall, requiring her daughter to come care for her from London. The use of the snow storm to represent dementia (from the older mother) and hazy memories (from her daughter) is striking. The two struggle as they navigate hosital/rehab/care facilities and insurance. Family drama is touched upon. I loved this graphic novel memoir! Keep them coming!

[Nicole · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this but it was also kind of a hard read due to the subject matter. Brought up a lot of memories and feelings of similar situations I've been in with my grandma and my own mom. Not for everyone but if the descriptions sounds like something you want to read then I'd highly recommend. I'll be thinking about this one for a while.

[Shannon · Rating 4 out of 5]

A moving, deeply personal graphic novel memoir of a middle aged daughter faced with caring for her aging mother with dementia. A great look at the American healthcare system and the way it fails the aging population, especially those with limited funds. Highly recommended, I especially enjoyed the mixed media format style of the illustrations!

[Sara Budarz · Rating 3 out of 5]

A memoir about an aging mother, but more than that it felt like a memoir written as a warning about insurance and the cost of elder care in the US and the impossible choices you have to make.
It was an engrossing read, but I suppose I had a bit of hard time understanding the author and the choices she makes.

[Maria · Rating 3 out of 5]

A story about dementia and how one's lived one's can completely change due to the illness. A person who used to manage everything with such ease now can't even plan her day, and their kid must make all those decisions with the guilt of not knowing if their parent will approve.

[Lesley · Rating 4 out of 5]

Denise takes us through the emotional and practical struggles of the discovery that a parent has dementia and navigating the American health care system to provide care. I very much enjoyed the perspective of an ex-pat having to come back to the US.

[Greg Bem · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fantastic story concerning end of life family situations, that unfortunately ends far too abruptly. Love Dorrance's art style!

Also, starting in 2026 I'll be putting all my reviews on StoryGraph and only doing star ratings on Goodreads! Consider connecting with me there.

[Benjimanmanman · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved the doodle style artwork, and it was a real tear jerker.

[Kim · Rating 5 out of 5]

Heartbreaking

[Maryann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved the art and concept, but I found the author’s voice to be pretty judgmental and entitled.

[Chris Brook · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very funny and touching memoir about aging and dementia. I think I saw this recommended in a NYT Books recap of recent graphic novels a few weeks ago, hadn't heard of it, happy I picked it up.

[Tricia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting and powerful insight into elder care in America. Daughter has to rush back to Iowa from England when her elderly mother has a health setback, and becomes aware of just how bad her mother's dementia is. No easy decisions at that point.

[Tania · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hit close to home for me. No new insight for a daughter caring for a parent with dementia but a comfort nonetheless.

[Corky · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm not sure how I feel having completed this memoir. On one hand, the nitpicking of Midwestern culture felt like a low blow of sorts - the author's deep desire to point out her otherness was simply UGH. But at the heart of this story is what we do when those who cared for us now need care. An incredibly difficult predicament, worsened by the American medical system. I wondered more about the sister and was a bit turned off by whatever suggestion bringing up postpartum depression made about her relationship with her mother. Overall I'm happy I read this, it's an important story even if I didn't understand the author's POV.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

If i had read this book 20 years ago, I would have sympathized, but not understood. Those of you who do not have elderly parents have *no* idea what getting them sorted when they can no longer live at home is like. With my mother, we had at least talked about it, and when the time came, she came to live with us.


The author in this story, lives abroad, and knows she can’t get her mother to come live with them, so goes to see what she can do. The way Medicare works in the United States is *very* confusing. The whole principal is that you have to keep getting better. When my partner ended up in the hospital, one of the reasons she was able to get in-hospital rehab was because she *was* getting better. In the case of the mother in this story, she is not getting better. She has dementia of some sort, and doesn’t seem to understand where she is until the system kicks her out and she goes home. There she is herself for the first time in the novel, and finally finds her purse that didn’t go to the hospital with her
The polar vortex in the title is referring to the type of weather that the area where her mother lives is having. Very different from the UK, where the author lives.


An excellent book for those who have gone through this, and those who have yet to go through this. I could see my mother in her mother.


Thanks to Netgalley for making this book available for an honest review. This book is coming out the 5th of March 2024.

[Dakota Morgan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reading this on the heels of Alison Bechdel's Are You My Mother? was a strange experience. Polar Vortex is also about the author's relationship with her aging mother, minus the psychology and literary references. By comparison, Polar Vortex is shockingly direct. The author, living in England, learns that her mother has had an accident in her home and rushes back to Iowa to take care of her.

The first thing the author discovers on arrival is that it's brutally cold in Iowa (as a Wisconsin resident, I know exactly what "polar vortex" means). The second thing is that her mother is suffering from dementia. The book descends from there into the dark realities of caring for an elderly, infirm parent. It's brutally real, from the shocking expense of the US health system to barely acceptable care facilities to the sad coming to terms with a new reality.

So, Polar Vortex is far from a fun read, even though the author occasionally inserts moments of black humor. It's nonetheless compelling and revelatory. The one big mark against it for me? The fact that book ends inconclusively, seemingly midway through the story. If you're hoping to learn something from the author about caring for a parent, you're going to be disappointed in the conclusion.

[Alison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Are you curious what happens (or didn't happen) after the book ends?

I was absolutely moved by this book. When I learned that the author is from Iowa, I reached out to her for an interview.

Here’s a link that takes you straight to the Q&A with Denise Dorrance.

... and if you'd like, you can read the fuller post about that discovery and falling in love with the book.

I hope you enjoy my chat with her if you read it, and that you felt the five-star-feeling as much as I did!

[Diana (diana_reads_and_reads) · Rating 3 out of 5]

As someone in the thick of dealing with elderly parents and what’s next, a lot of this was relatable. I appreciated all the struggles with the options, balancing life and care, and the nod to our shitty insurance and elder plans in the U.S. I did not appreciate the author’s obvious disdain of the U.S. despite being American. Even as a liberal who hates the absolute lack of a social safety net, there’s a tone of everywhere abroad is better that can really get under my skin. I don’t like being critical of a memoir, since it is someone’s lived experience and they feel how they feel, but I also like to give a caution to future readers. 3.5 stars.

[Dana Fontaine · Rating 5 out of 5]

So sad! Very very good.

[Shana Bird · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.5⭐️