Hell Gate Bridge: A Memoir of Motherhood, Madness, and Hope

by Barrie Miskin

"Miskin's searing memoir about her experience with a mysterious mental illness during and after her pregnancy provides a haunting window into the state of health care in the United States."— The Washington Post, 10 Noteworthy Books for June 2024

A Poets & Writers Magazine Page One New and Noteworthy Book

A Write or Die Magazine Most Anticipated Book of June 2024

A Mom Egg Review Bookshelf Pick for June 2024

In the summer of 2016, Barrie Miskin faced a pivotal moment when her pregnancy prompted the discontinuation of a decade-long antidepressant regimen, setting off an unforeseen chain of events. By January 2017, she had become a stranger to her family and herself, navigating the complex and often unforgiving landscape of mental healthcare in the United States. Through encounters marked by compassion and cruelty, Barrie's family embarked on a desperate quest for a diagnosis, ultimately uncovering the rare condition of pregnancy-induced depersonalization and derealization disorder.

Hell Gate Bridge not only brings to light these seldom-discussed mental illnesses but also unveils the flaws in our maternal and mental healthcare system. Barrie's journey, marked by resilience, became a relentless climb out of the abyss, all while balancing the challenges of motherhood, maintaining her teaching career, and preserving her marriage. The narrative serves as a testament to the power of determination in overcoming the darkest of challenges and fighting fiercely to save those we hold dear.

258 pages, Paperback

Published June 4, 2024

About the author

Barrie Miskin is the author of the debut memoir Hell Gate Bridge (Woodhall Press, 2024). Her writing has appeared in Romper, Hobart, Narratively and elsewhere and her interviews can be found in Write or Die magazine, where she is a regular contributor. Barrie lives in Queens, New York with her husband and daughter.

Reviews

[Ethan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Digital ARC provided by the author.

[Emily Varlas · Rating 5 out of 5]

The mystery of Barrie’s illness, and the inability to find proper care illuminates the many ways the health care system is broken and further injures people suffering from mental illness. This book was incredibly compelling, heart-wrenching, and life affirming. It should be required reading for those entering the mental health field, like myself. It was also incredibly validating to learn of another mother’s struggle during pregnancy and post-partum. Normally I start a book and finish it a couple years later, this one I couldn’t put down. I agree with another review about the thriller-esque writing. It really keeps you moving. But the story has so much more depth than your typical thriller. I had many a good cry while reading this— I think it really helped me process some of my own grief. It’s a great read on a lot of levels. Buy it.

[Emma Burger · Rating 5 out of 5]

Barrie's memoir is harrowing and so very real! Flew through this book in one night. Couldn't put it down. Truly one of the most unique and beautifully told stories of mental illness that I've read. Just finished this and already, I want to re-read.

[Margo Steines · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book in 2 days on an airplane and could. not. put. it. down. (I got a digital ARC). There is so much about mental health, particularly around pregnancy and postpartum, that we just don't talk about and this book really goes there, from the despair and torture of her specific condition to the care, ranging from useless to harmful, that is available, to the particular hell of being all fucked up while you are trying to bond with and raise a tiny human. Every flap copy says "propulsive" but this book actually is, and by the end of it I felt like i was/wanted to be best friends w the author. Super excited to see this one out in the world!

[Judith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wow finished this in one afternoon. Hell Gate Bridge is the harrowing story of the author’s descent into a rare maternal mental illness. She chronicles her journey through the American health care system and all its failings and inadequacies. By sheer perseverance and the luck to find the right doctor, Barrie is finally on the road to recovery. Told unsparingly with detailed prose, I couldn’t stop turning the pages!

[Jessie Clark · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really well written account of the heartbreaking reality of our medical system in the United States. Obviously with mental healthcare specifically, but the problem is much more widespread. As hard as this was to read emotionally, it was also inspiring how the desperate love for her beautiful daughter helped to pull her through.

Thank you Daina for this recommendation!!! I really enjoyed it :)

[Catrina Genovese · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very moving

As a MCH nurse, I found the authors journey incredibly profound and so relative to the struggles of hormonal shifts and the exacerbations so common to those going through pregnancy with a history of depression.

[Sally Mcintyre · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding writing. I felt like I was beside Barrie throughout her extraordinary journey.
I could not put this down. Her raw honesty and fight to get back to her family.

[Hillevi Robertsson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Could not put it down!