The Unexpected Abigail Adams: A Woman "Not Apt to be Intimidated"

by John L. Smith Jr.

"If any young woman wants to have a nice, quiet life, I advise her not to marry an Adams," wrote Abigail Smith Adams's granddaughter-in-law. Abigail Adams--wife to President John Adams, family matriarch, proto feminist, second First Lady, and first presidential advisor in early America--certainly did not have "a nice, quiet life." She was not only an eyewitness to America's founding, she helped to shape large portions of it working through her trusting husband, John. Later in her life, Abigail looked back and firmly stated, "no man ever prospered in the world without the consent and cooperation of his wife."

Abigail's unique contributions throughout her life led to the establishment and stability of the first new form of democratic government in the world. It easily marks her as one of the Founders of the United States of America. Abigail met almost every important figure of the American Revolutionary period: George Washington and his wife Martha (whom she loved), Thomas Jefferson, Sally Hemings, Benjamin Franklin, Henry Knox, Samuel and Elizabeth Adams, John Hancock, John and Sarah Jay, Marquis and Adrienne de Lafayette, John Paul Jones, Alexander Hamilton (whom she hated), James Monroe, artist Patience Wright, and even King George III and Queen Charlotte, as well as King Louis XVI and Queen Marie Antoinette. Abigail famously wrote more than two thousand letters, spanning from the 1760s to her death in 1818, a priceless documentation of one of the most important periods of world history. In these letters she comments on the varied personalities she encountered, personal and historic snapshots of the time.

In The Unexpected Abigail Adams: A Woman "Not Apt to Be Intimidated", writer and researcher John L. Smith, Jr. presents sides of Abigail's life that are not covered by the standard, retold biographies. The author interweaves Abigail's colorful correspondence--some of which has not appeared in print before--with a contextual narrative. The result is a revealing portrait of a remarkable woman very relatable to modern readers. Having read and studied nearly her entire correspondence, the author describes the experience as panning for gold, for her letters contain a wealth of nuggets of wisdom, but also humorous moments, poignant reflections, and unique historical descriptions. The result is an unexpected Abigail Adams, one that will transform how she will be perceived going forward and one that recognizes our national debt to her for her sagacious

Genres: History, Biography, Presidents, Nonfiction, American History, Biography Memoir

400 pages, Hardcover

First published March 1, 2024

Reviews

[Brookie Taylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a woman for the ages! She was a confidant & “political aide” to John from the beginning, which makes her one of the most crucial actors in American history — a founding mother, if you will. ;) I loved this read. It was so fun to hear words that came directly from her through a primary source material (her letters to John and many others). This is not a woman who had it easy. She suffered with depression, had a still born birth, lost a young baby, lost an adult son and daughter, and took care of her house and the financial needs of her family while John was in the constitutional convention and abroad on political duty for years. A true American hero.

“If we mean to have heroes, statesmen and philosophers, we should have learned women.” - Abigail Adams

“I've always felt that a person's intelligence is directly reflected by the number of conflicting points of view he can entertain simultaneously on the same topic.” - Abigail Adams

[Frrobins · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was pleased to find this recent biography of Abigail Adams. Using as source material her vast legacy of letters that she either wrote to John Adams or other family and friends, this was an engaging and readable biography whose only Achilles' heel was how sloppy it was at times.

Given that I am used to reading about people whose lives are not well documented or who did not give much insight into their feelings, it was fun to read about someone who did pour her heart into her letters and let her thoughts be known. I am also glad the author avoided the tendency of some biographers to narrate a scene and put thoughts into Abigail's head, preferring to let Abigail speak for herself through her letters and rather poignantly at times.

What emerges is a portrait of a strong, intelligent woman who loved her family and her country. She was quite the business woman, keeping the family financially afloat through running a business and learning about how to make good investments while John was off building a new nation. She was also very much John's confidant and advisor and I love stories about egalitarian marriages even during times where this was not recognized in law (something I feel Abigail chaffed at and tried to get around as the mere existence of her last will and testament suggests). And it was interesting getting insights into the conflicts and frustrations of a woman who was intelligent and wanted her daughter to have more educational opportunities than she did but also accepted the harsh reality of the times that they lived in. In light of the lack of opportunities she butted against, I was very glad that she got to spend some time in Europe and enjoyed reading about her experiences there. And it was also fun to read Abigail's thoughts on the Empire dresses that became popular in the period after the Revolutionary war.

Abigail comes off as likeable and relatable, especially during these contentious times in our modern political history. In the feuds conducted Abigail and John conducted through letters you can see a slower paced social media brawl and while I see some people in mental health maintain the opinion that our modern maladies are very recent, Abigail had both an alcoholic brother and an alcoholic son and mentioned that England had an appallingly high suicide rate. Aside from how fast our modern society moves I do not see that we are that different.

I do wish the author had done more in terms of background information and organization and at times the book was quite sloppy. The author glossed over John Adams's background entirely even when things became relevant. For instance, he talks about John Adams being inoculated for small pox, a controversial procedure, at the beginning of the book. I did wonder at John Adams's reason for getting inoculated and why Abigail didn't. Towards the middle of the book Abigail's inoculation was discussed as well as her reasons for not getting it done earlier, and then towards the end of the book the author mentioned that John Adams's mother was the granddaughter of the man who invented smallpox inoculations (which I assume is how John knew a lot about the procedure and was a factor in his decision to be inoculated). And while the fact that Abigail's family of origin owned slaves was mentioned and how this helped her to realize that slavery was bad was touched upon, he never did explicitly go into whether or not John and Abigail owned slaves (which they did not) though he did go into Abigail's struggles to find paid farm workers during the war. Subjects I was interested in seeing fleshed out would be dropped abruptly and radically new tangents introduced abruptly and at times the book was repetitive.

Towards the end I started to see passages like this: "In past years, Abigail would have wasted no time in traveling to Nabby no matter where she was living, or ask Nabby to travel to Quincy. But in 1813 both parties were unable to travel to the other. Faced with that situation, Nabby, her children John and Caroline, and Colonel Smith's sister Nancy traveled the three hundred miles in a very bumpy carriage to reach Quincy..." If Nabby was able to reach Quincy then why the sentence about how neither of them could travel to each other?

My enjoyment of reading this book did not diminish because of the sloppiness and even with the confusing passages I was able to make sense of it, but I did wonder if the author was running against a tight deadline. Generally while reading biographies I am ready for things to be wrapped up in the end, but this one left me wanting more and wishing that some things had been better fleshed out and organized. I am glad to have this biography but I also would have been happy to wait a few more months to allow the author polish it more. It could have been a five star review with some spit and polish especially when you account for the fact that the disorganization did not dampen my enthusiasm for the book. And even with the flaws of this book I would highly recommend it and am glad I read it.

[DJ · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a great woman. Fun read.

[Jamie · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a woman for the ages. When we talk about Founding Fathers, Abigail Adams should be included. Wise, patriotic, brave and a loving mother and wife. She was a role model in her time but she could be one today also.

[Darcy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have long admired the relationship between Abigail and John Adams. Abigail Adams was a strong, independent, and intelligent woman. Far from being intimidated by her strengths, John gloried in them and took her advice. This book delved into their relationship a bit, but mostly it focused on Abigail's development from a headstrong teenager, to a young married woman who sacrificed many years away from her husband, to a woman at the center of a country who was developing and solidifying its identity apart from Great Britain.
Through it all, Abigail shines with grit and optimism. Four of my favorite quotes from her letters:

"If we mean to have Heroes, Statesmen, and Philosophers, we should have learned women" (98).

"These are the times in which a genius would wish to live It is not in the still calm of life, or the repose of a pacific station, that great characters are formed. . . . Great necessities call out great virtues" (132).

"the more we are qualified to help ourselves, the less dependent we are upon others" (285).

"It is true, we have not always power over our own lot, to carve it out as we please, but the mind has power over itself; and happiness has its seat in the mind" (312).

I was inspired by this book, but the five star rating is based solely on the fact that Abigail Adams was an amazing woman and this book contained so much of her writing. So, I guess you could say that Abigail Adams herself inspired me, not this book. Based on the writing of the author, this would be more of a 3.5 star book.

[Morning Glory · Rating 4 out of 5]

So enjoyable! The letters between Abigail and John were great, interesting seeing the inner workings of families back then. She was a capable lady, from economics to politics!
Chapter 11 was gut-wrenching with the story of her miscarriage, esp John’s reaction: “Is it not unaccountable, that one should feel so strong an Affection for an Infant, that one has never seen, nor shall see?” 107 😢
The book takes you through the ups and downs of their lives as parents and grandparents, from the hilarious botched courtship of Royall Tyler (Rascall, as John astutely called him) to their daughter marrying Col. Smith. “I believe a soldier is always more expeditious in his courtships than other Men, they know better how to capture the citadal.” 190
Always love the Washington cameos, with one of the sweetest descriptions of Martha. “a most becoming plasentness sits upon her countenance, & an unaffected deportment which renders her the object of veneration and Respect…” 215
Beyond the honest and often funny writings from Abigail, the author is clearly charmed and wants readers to be as engaged and surprised as he is by the turns of events, while offering explanations and apologies for modern readers’ sensibilities. Just a good time overall.

[Bess]

I will say this is thoroughly researched. The author summarizes what they believe the intent of the position, opinion or sentiment of Abigail Adams (or John Adams) is as derived from interpretations between letters from either Abigail or John to XYZ person, and supported by a line or two from a letter substantiating their interpretation. The line or two are copied verbatim from the original letter, which means it is 1770’s writing style, including phonetic spelling, erratic punctuation, as well as terms, meanings, references and people that are barely relatable at best in today’s era. If you are an early American history buff, a John or Abigail Adams fan then you will appreciate this book, if not, this may be a struggle.

[Paula · Rating 4 out of 5]

While reading non-fiction can be a bit of a slog, this book was quite readable. I learned a lot by the way it was written, not just facts and dates but rather put in context by year. This author’s view makes Mrs. Adams such an intelligent, informed woman of the 1700’s. I thought it was really cool how she was into investing and leaving a will and had strong political opinions. A woman of today in many ways and had she lived in the 21st century she surely would have been a strong advocate for women’s rights and perhaps a political office for herself.

[Dawna · Rating 4 out of 5]

An extremely well researched comprehensive writing. It was too comprehensive for me overall. I would have liked a more personal feeling in relationship to Abigail. The inclusion of her actual letters was the most enjoyable part of the biography.

[Christina Karvounis · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved this book. I have actively been seeking bios about strong women lately and this one was fantastic. Cleary beyond her times (though privileged) she (one of many of course) walked so suffragists could run. Inspiring.

[D Mason · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a treat. This book did a great job of staying focused on things from Abigail Adams point of view. She sounds like she was intelligent, funny, and called things as she saw them.

[Katie · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars