Empowered to Love: Discovering Your God-Given Power to Create a Marriage You Both Love

by Robert S. Paul, Tara Lalonde

Discover how to build a fulfilling, God-honoring marriage that you both love.

When life throws us non-stop challenges and curveballs, how can we have any hope of building a fulfilling and intimate marriage? How do we move from stressed and stretched to energized and inspired, finding the strength to transform both our lives and relationship?

Robert Paul and Tara Lalonde equip husbands and wives with practical, biblically-based tools to transform their personal lives and grow their marriage into something they’ll both love. Instead of just passively hoping and praying for something better, couples will actively embark on a journey of caring for themselves and their most important relationship. In Empowered to Love , you will Invest in your future, both as an individual and as a spouse. Embark on a transformative journey that will help both you and your marriage thrive.

Genres: Marriage

272 pages, Paperback

Published July 2, 2024

Reviews

[Chelsey Gordon · Rating 5 out of 5]

✨ Disclaimer ✨
Thank you to NetGalley, Tyndale House Publishers, Focus on the Family, and the authors for this digital ARC! As always, my recommendation comes with my honest review and touchy topics listed below to help you make an informed decision.

✨ Review ✨
Y’all know I believe in the strong link between Christianity and psychology. Not only do they both exist simultaneously, but they complement one another incredibly well. Historically, there hasn’t been much to choose from in the world of literature that shows this invaluable link, but that is changing, and I am like a kid in a candy shop.

If you know me, you also know that I 🩵LOVE🩵 helping people. Lately, I’ve been discovering that helping people (especially young women) with their faith and with their marriage is such a blessing and an area I am prayerfully considering as a gift from the Lord -if anyone has made the switch from pursuing LPC to LMFT, please message me!

I say this next statement with excited sincerity; as someone who believes in the power of Godly marriage, is incredibly fulfilled in her faith and loves her husband and marriage, did not hate her first year of marriage, and has a Christian psychology degree, I BEG of you, please read this book.

If you’re:
💕 single
💕 dating
💕 engaged
💕 married
💕 separated
💕 not planning to be married but still have platonic relationships with others
💕 want to develop healthy communication habits and practice Godly self-care all while maintaining righteous boundaries
💕 are interested in marriage, conflict resolution, or Christian psychology as areas of study
💕 any of the above

You WILL find biblical truth, sound psychological advice, and practical steps you can apply in your life today within the pages of this book. I cannot recommend this book enough.

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Content: 🍓🍓🍓

✨ Touchy Topics ✨
This is a nonfiction book with some (protected) real-life examples, but nothing is too heavy or intense. The reason for the 3 🍓 rating is I personally believe this book would benefit those aged eighteen and older based on typical development.

Rating Scale:

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️: PERFECT. Probably cried
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️: Wonderful, just not top 10
⭐️⭐️⭐️: Good! Most books fit here
⭐️⭐️: Not really my cup of tea
⭐️: Basically DNF

Content Scale:

🍓🍓🍓🍓🍓: Squeaky clean!
🍓🍓🍓🍓: Appropriate for most readers
🍓🍓🍓: Heavy topics, likely 18+
🍓🍓: Intense scenes about heavy topics
🍓: Tread lightly

[Tanya · Rating 4 out of 5]

As much as we all want to live happily ever after, it turns out married couples need to actually do a little something to maintain a long lasting, happy and fulfilling marriage.
But it doesn't have to depend on both couples doing the work or going to counseling /therapy. Sometimes (often), one person doing work can also make for a successful marriage.
Sometimes we take in more than we should, and other times we shirk our responsibilities and resort to blame (unhealthy.)

The authors of Empowered to Love guide the reader through some helpful steps to work through and towards the type of relationship the reader is likely looking for.
And guess what? It starts with looking at oneself, figuring out who you are and what you want and where the control lies, all with our hearts set ultimately on Christ on.

Biblical references are applied throughout.

I can see this as a helpful resource to a Christian looking to better their marriage. Much of the info I've seen elsewhere (even in secular self help resources), but it may be better received for some through the Christian lens.

[Cheri Swalwell · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book left me thinking and was incredibly encouraging. I'm still thinking about the way to handle connection versus conflict. I love how the authors talked about when you're in a marriage it's a win-win situation and to settle for less isn't acceptable. Both authors were really encouraging with their stories about their own marriages and I believe they will encourage many.

[Jonathan Beigle · Rating 5 out of 5]

Empowered to Love was excellent. I received the book when my wife and I attended a Hope Restored marriage intensive this summer. After hearing the information in this book in July, this was an excellent reminder of what we discussed in our 4 days of intense counseling. The authors are real about what has (and is) happening in their marraiges, and I really appreciated that. Tara even mentions (I'm paraphrazing here) that she's not sure that her marriage will ever get to a great place, but she is working on herself and doing everything she can to make her marriage the best it can be. It walks through the key tools from Hope Restored, the Care Cycle, Heart Talk and Work Talk. For someone who is struggling in their marriage, I believe this is an excellent resource and challenges the common thinking about marriage. The biggest focus is to work on yourself first, and that should set your marriage on the right track.

Favorite quotes:
p. 3 - "You can take the first steps today to improve your marriage, even without your spouse's participation."
p. 16 - "Fully embracing personal responsibility is the key to empowerment."
p. 30 - "If no one is working to make things better, nothing will change. Nothing will improve."
p. 64 - "First, love is not about need. Deep and passionate love is about desire! We don't need our spouses in order to live; we need God for that. We don't need our spouses so we can be fully who we were created to be. Again, that's between us and God. And we don't need our spouses to be fulfilled. God is our source.
p. 66 - "The truth is that God intentionally created our spouses, and any attempt to change them places us at odds not only with them but with our Creator as well."
p. 74 - "Instead of letting simple knee-jerk reactions control you, bring your adult brain back into the equation. Conscious awareness allows you to begin intentionally looking for better options."
p. 152 - "Feeling safe together is the foundation of a great marriage."
p. 156 - "An attitude of curiosity and fascination is central to a marriage filled with romance and passion...There is always something new and exciting to discuss when you're curious."
p. 208 - "Even when you think you're invisible - when it seems as if no one notices what you do - people around you are taking note of your life."

[Shawna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good tools and insights that help get to root of the problem. I did think some of what was meant by protecting yourself emotionally/self care could be fleshed out more fully in a way that aligns with Scripture and the sacrifice of self and humility that we are called to in Christ.

[Abigail Umstatter · Rating 4 out of 5]

So encouraging. Would love to have a hard copy for my book shelf