What do you think?
Rate this book
Dear Jacob
On October 22, 1989, in the small town of St. Joseph, Minnesota, eleven-year-old Jacob Wetterling was kidnapped at gunpoint. Twenty-seven years later, Danny Heinrich led authorities to the boy’s remains. What lies between is the riveting story of the search for Jacob, told by his mother, Patty. With down-to-earth candor, she details the investigation as it unfolds, discusses her family’s struggles, and shows how she maintained her energy and optimism.
For her own survival, Patty chose to focus on hope. She became a speaker, trainer, and national advocate for missing children. Her lobbying work took her to Washington, DC, where in 1994 Congress passed the Jacob Wetterling Act, establishing a national sex offender registry. In 2013, the Wetterlings were joined on their quest for answers by two unlikely allies: local blogger Joy Baker and plumber Jared Scheierl. Baker convinced Scheierl to come forward and share his story about being kidnapped from a nearby town and sexually assaulted the same year as Jacob. Together, Baker and Scheierl uncovered a string of similar assaults that had never been fully investigated. The combined efforts of this foursome led to the breakthrough that solved the case.
Dear Jacob offers not only a behind-the-scenes account of one of America's most notorious crimes but also a historical account of what has been done in the years since to combat the problem of missing and exploited children.
13 hrs. 28 min.
For her own survival, Patty chose to focus on hope. She became a speaker, trainer, and national advocate for missing children. Her lobbying work took her to Washington, DC, where in 1994 Congress passed the Jacob Wetterling Act, establishing a national sex offender registry. In 2013, the Wetterlings were joined on their quest for answers by two unlikely allies: local blogger Joy Baker and plumber Jared Scheierl. Baker convinced Scheierl to come forward and share his story about being kidnapped from a nearby town and sexually assaulted the same year as Jacob. Together, Baker and Scheierl uncovered a string of similar assaults that had never been fully investigated. The combined efforts of this foursome led to the breakthrough that solved the case.
Dear Jacob offers not only a behind-the-scenes account of one of America's most notorious crimes but also a historical account of what has been done in the years since to combat the problem of missing and exploited children.
13 hrs. 28 min.
14 pages, Audible Audio
First published October 17, 2023
275 people are currently reading
2917 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 30 of 465 reviews
October 9, 2023
These GoodReads ratings really fail to express my thoughts on this book. "I really liked it" does not give this book the respect or gravitas it deserves. I was 16 and living in a small town in Minnesota when the news came out that Jacob Wetterling was abducted. His story became our story as the months turned into years, and then decades.
The book is quite detailed--Patty Wetterling gives us a back-stage pass into the decades-long struggle to bring Jacob home and we hear about not only the investigations, but the family's struggles, the heartbreak of following lead after lead to nowhere, and Patty's advocacy work. At one point I stopped reading and had to give myself permission to not continue when in the book we get Heinrich's confession. This was a very emotional read.
Patty has shared such an intimate and devastating part of her life. Nothing but respect for her.
The book is quite detailed--Patty Wetterling gives us a back-stage pass into the decades-long struggle to bring Jacob home and we hear about not only the investigations, but the family's struggles, the heartbreak of following lead after lead to nowhere, and Patty's advocacy work. At one point I stopped reading and had to give myself permission to not continue when in the book we get Heinrich's confession. This was a very emotional read.
Patty has shared such an intimate and devastating part of her life. Nothing but respect for her.
October 22, 2023
Patty Wetterling must be the strongest and most courageous woman alive. Reading the details of her heartbreaking journey into finding the truth just about gutted me. At the time Jacob went missing just a few hours away from where I lived, the idea of someone from school or a friend disappearing like that was scary. Now, as a mother with a son, I cannot fathom the pain Patty endured for nearly three decades. I sobbed along with Patty and her family throughout the last several chapters. I wish I could hug each and every one of them.
I’ve turned on my porch light over the years on some of Jacob’s anniversaries and when he was found. I promise to do better to live a life to honor the 11 traits that capture Jacob’s spirit.
I’ve turned on my porch light over the years on some of Jacob’s anniversaries and when he was found. I promise to do better to live a life to honor the 11 traits that capture Jacob’s spirit.
October 21, 2023
This is a special book for me. Jacob’s abduction changed the peace of the whole state of Minnesota. Perhaps, here in Minnesota, we were the holdouts but before 10/22/1989, our children were safe in our neighborhoods, after dark, sometimes alone.
When Jacob’s story broke, the State broke with the Wetterlings. Devastation.
In 1989, I was still 5 years from meeting my husband and 7 years away from being a mother. In those 7 years the Minnesota Hover Mother movement was born.
I resisted the movement but it still affected my parenting in its sum. Our children were always within eye sight of us or another trusted adult. Even school drop off consisted of me watching them all the way into the school doors. Even though the signage asked us to drop and move on immediately. Alarms were installed in our house and the boys knew how to arm and disarm them at a very young age. Still today at 25 and 26, if they are traveling alone I beg them to text me to mark their safety ( they refuse to let me gps track them and I’ve bravely conceded that they are adults and it wouldn’t be healthy for any of us).
My kids can still explain the zig zag run and shout if approached by a stranger. We practiced it. They laugh at me about this still today. As we’ve all grown, we realize this might not have worked so well.
They were taught to raise their voices if someone touched them wrongly (at church of all places).
And then there was Patty. To this day I still think of her from time to time. I met her at a parade and when I held her hand I could feel all of everything pour out of her. In that moment I so deeply felt her sorrow through all the hope she was sowing for those around her. I have never forgotten this.
The Wetterlings are incredible people. If you ever feel you need the gift of resiliency or hope or just need to see the light in this dark world, this book is a must read.
When Jacob’s story broke, the State broke with the Wetterlings. Devastation.
In 1989, I was still 5 years from meeting my husband and 7 years away from being a mother. In those 7 years the Minnesota Hover Mother movement was born.
I resisted the movement but it still affected my parenting in its sum. Our children were always within eye sight of us or another trusted adult. Even school drop off consisted of me watching them all the way into the school doors. Even though the signage asked us to drop and move on immediately. Alarms were installed in our house and the boys knew how to arm and disarm them at a very young age. Still today at 25 and 26, if they are traveling alone I beg them to text me to mark their safety ( they refuse to let me gps track them and I’ve bravely conceded that they are adults and it wouldn’t be healthy for any of us).
My kids can still explain the zig zag run and shout if approached by a stranger. We practiced it. They laugh at me about this still today. As we’ve all grown, we realize this might not have worked so well.
They were taught to raise their voices if someone touched them wrongly (at church of all places).
And then there was Patty. To this day I still think of her from time to time. I met her at a parade and when I held her hand I could feel all of everything pour out of her. In that moment I so deeply felt her sorrow through all the hope she was sowing for those around her. I have never forgotten this.
The Wetterlings are incredible people. If you ever feel you need the gift of resiliency or hope or just need to see the light in this dark world, this book is a must read.
November 19, 2023
I don't even know how to put into words how much this book moved me. As a mom, I absolutely cannot imagine how Patty managed to get through every day after Jacob disappeared or how she survived when she found out in detail what happened to him. Her willingness to share her family's story was not necessary. However, she does so with honesty, vulnerability and even a little humor in this memoir. It's a difficult read at times but well worth it. I hope writing this was in some way healing for Patty.
October 29, 2023
This was a really tough book to read and I often found myself with tears running down my face. Things were talked about frankly in this book, done in a way that you could understand what the Wetterlings were going through at the high trauma times and how they managed to live their lives in the in between and finally when they had to face the hardest truth ever and how to deal with the bad guy and learning what happened to Jacob.
As a kid who grew up in the 70' - 80's, it seemed like there were a lot of kidnappings, missing kids were on milk cartons, I remember when Adam Walsh was kidnapped and the huge story that was. I didn't live in MN when Jacob went missing, but did move here in the mid 90's, went to college in WI (an hour and half from the Twin Cities) in the early 90's, so it feels like I've always been aware of what happened to Jacob and when the anniversary's would pop up, everything was in the news again. Jacob never really left people's thoughts, it was always there in the back ground. I even remember the day that it became public knowledge that he was found and how bittersweet that was. It was all anyone talked about, glad that he was found, but wished it had been alive.
I really love the legacy that Jacob has left behind, from his family and Patty's relentless support of missing kids, to the 11 things to remember him by. For someone who had a short life, he left a big impact!
As a kid who grew up in the 70' - 80's, it seemed like there were a lot of kidnappings, missing kids were on milk cartons, I remember when Adam Walsh was kidnapped and the huge story that was. I didn't live in MN when Jacob went missing, but did move here in the mid 90's, went to college in WI (an hour and half from the Twin Cities) in the early 90's, so it feels like I've always been aware of what happened to Jacob and when the anniversary's would pop up, everything was in the news again. Jacob never really left people's thoughts, it was always there in the back ground. I even remember the day that it became public knowledge that he was found and how bittersweet that was. It was all anyone talked about, glad that he was found, but wished it had been alive.
I really love the legacy that Jacob has left behind, from his family and Patty's relentless support of missing kids, to the 11 things to remember him by. For someone who had a short life, he left a big impact!
January 5, 2024
I'm from the area where this kidnapping happened. It permeated life in Minnesota for many, many years. Then the story slowly, gradually faded into the background. But it never went away. Until Heinrich was arrested. Then, 1989 came rushing back.
Patty Wetterling is an inspirational person. She devoted herself to the safety of children after the kidnapping of her son. Joy Baker is a wonder, bringing back to life this story.
The book is very well written. It moves along at a steady pace. Patty touches on many milestones of this ordeal without needlessly meandering. She gives a glimpse into the family's life, Jacob's personality, her quest to find answers, the dealings - both bad and good - with law enforcement, and she bares her heart when the truth is found.
Fantastic book.
Patty Wetterling is an inspirational person. She devoted herself to the safety of children after the kidnapping of her son. Joy Baker is a wonder, bringing back to life this story.
The book is very well written. It moves along at a steady pace. Patty touches on many milestones of this ordeal without needlessly meandering. She gives a glimpse into the family's life, Jacob's personality, her quest to find answers, the dealings - both bad and good - with law enforcement, and she bares her heart when the truth is found.
Fantastic book.
July 3, 2025
It’s difficult to rate such a sad and tragic story 5 stars, but Jacob deserves all the stars and he deserves to be remembered. I was 3 when Jacob was abducted and I can still vividly picture his missing posters up all over the Twin Cities growing up, and feeling so sad for him, hoping he would be found. I also recall always receiving the “stranger danger” talks as a kid because of this event. Jacob’s abduction affected all of Minnesota and forever changed childhoods.
It took me awhile to pick this book up because I already knew the devastating ending and knew it would be sad. The narrator did a fantastic job voicing Patty’s hope to find Jacob as she describes the 27 year nightmare she endured. I cannot imagine what she went through, and I hope she’s at peace. I am now 39 with an (almost) 11 year old - the same age Patty and Jacob were on October 22, 1989, my heart aches for her. I was not aware of all the advocacy work she did for missing children, Patty tiredly worked to change laws and she saved lives. It shouldn’t have taken Jacob to be abducted and killed for laws to change to protect children, and we still have so much work to do. I have zero tolerance for pedophiles. So many lives were destroyed by Danny Heinrich. Just hearing about the terror of Jacob’s last moments were stomach turning, all so some sicko can get off. Lock ‘em up and throw away the key.
It took me awhile to pick this book up because I already knew the devastating ending and knew it would be sad. The narrator did a fantastic job voicing Patty’s hope to find Jacob as she describes the 27 year nightmare she endured. I cannot imagine what she went through, and I hope she’s at peace. I am now 39 with an (almost) 11 year old - the same age Patty and Jacob were on October 22, 1989, my heart aches for her. I was not aware of all the advocacy work she did for missing children, Patty tiredly worked to change laws and she saved lives. It shouldn’t have taken Jacob to be abducted and killed for laws to change to protect children, and we still have so much work to do. I have zero tolerance for pedophiles. So many lives were destroyed by Danny Heinrich. Just hearing about the terror of Jacob’s last moments were stomach turning, all so some sicko can get off. Lock ‘em up and throw away the key.
November 12, 2023
This is more than a 5⭐️ book. This is a family’s journey through the unimaginable. How can anyone truly comprehend wondering for 27 f-ing years where your son/brother/friend is? Patty and Joy share just enough to satisfy readers, while respecting the Wetterling family’s privacy, as well as that of Jared and the other Paynesville victims. They captured their frustration at times with law enforcement and the investigation with poise and restraint. They share some of the other frustrations the Wetterling family endured, while I’m sure they could fill the pages of 10 books with all the frustrating experiences. Yes, there are sad and gut-wrenching parts of this book, but Patty doesn’t dwell there. Through this entire book, I could feel the hope seeping out of the pages that Patty and her family held on to for almost 3 decades. Hurry up and read this book!
January 4, 2024
Growing up in Minnesota, Jacob Wetterling was a household name. This book is going to stick with me.
December 3, 2025
Never sobbed harder reading a memoir
December 1, 2024
What a tragic, powerful story. I recommend this book to everyone, especially my fellow Bennies.
February 18, 2025
I have a lot of childhood memories of my mom talking about Jacob Wetterling. He was abducted as a young boy in Minnesota just a few years before I was born and his body wasn't found for 27 years. Heartbreaking to hear his mom Patty tell the story in her own words. I wish my own mom could have lived to see the day they found him because I know how impactful his disappearance was on her as a Minnesota parent.
October 19, 2023
What a horrible story! I remember it from the time and have read about it over the years.
That said, the day after I got the book from the library, 20/20 aired a 2-hour show about the case, obviously intended to coincide with the book release. That, of course, filled in a lot of the blanks for me.
I went ahead with the book. Honestly it was much too much detail and I ended up skimming much of it. For those more interested in how hideous her emotions were, I guess it would be good. I was more interested in just the story of the investigation. I certainly didn't want to read the private letters she wrote to Jacob while he was missing.
That said, my heart breaks for the family and for poor Jacob, who did not deserve to die that way.
Oh and I really appreciate books that have beautiful font and spacing. This did.
That said, the day after I got the book from the library, 20/20 aired a 2-hour show about the case, obviously intended to coincide with the book release. That, of course, filled in a lot of the blanks for me.
I went ahead with the book. Honestly it was much too much detail and I ended up skimming much of it. For those more interested in how hideous her emotions were, I guess it would be good. I was more interested in just the story of the investigation. I certainly didn't want to read the private letters she wrote to Jacob while he was missing.
That said, my heart breaks for the family and for poor Jacob, who did not deserve to die that way.
Oh and I really appreciate books that have beautiful font and spacing. This did.
April 4, 2024
I’ve followed this story for years having attended college in the same town where Jacob was abducted. My college roommate’s dad (Bruce Bechtold - mentioned in the book) was a new police in 1989, and Jacob’s case was actually his first. After Heinrich’s confession 27 years later, Bruce retired. He spent his whole career alongside the Wetterlings as they worked and hoped for their son’s safe homecoming, all while also helping protect other missing and exploited youth.
Patty Wetterling’s strength is incredible. I’m not sure how she managed to write this book and share it with the world, but I’m glad she did. As a mom, I was a wreck during this whole thing, but especially at the end when she shares Heinrich’s detailed confession of the night he molested and killed Jacob. Wow. It’s gut-wrenching.
In my opinion, this is a must-read.
Patty Wetterling’s strength is incredible. I’m not sure how she managed to write this book and share it with the world, but I’m glad she did. As a mom, I was a wreck during this whole thing, but especially at the end when she shares Heinrich’s detailed confession of the night he molested and killed Jacob. Wow. It’s gut-wrenching.
In my opinion, this is a must-read.
April 13, 2024
Listened to this for book club. At first I was disappointed that Patty wasn’t reading it herself, but as I got into it, I was grateful it wasn’t her voice. I don’t think my mama heart could have taken hearing her voice along with her powerful words. This is story is so deeply woven in the fabric of our part of the country and it’s so just so.absolutely.heartbreaking. I had to force myself to keep listening at times. This book and story is definitely not for everyone! 💔 The biggest takeaway for me was the profound impact community, family and friends made in the lives of those who loved Jacob. And listening to Party’s letters to Jacob. Heavens.
November 2, 2023
I knew how this ended, but this still made me cry. I can’t imagine experiencing this kind of pain.
February 1, 2024
The most heartbreaking, devastating, and eye-opening book that is simultaneously so impactful and a testament to the power of hope - I cried for Patty, Jacob, and the reality of this world
November 5, 2023
Jacob Wetterling’s abduction on October 22, 1989 changed life for everyone in MN. Patty Wetterling recounts the events of that day, the events following the abduction, the 27 years in between, and finally how Jacob was finally found.
Patty is one amazing woman! The work she has done for children in this country is second to none. I wish her all the happiness in the world along with her family.
Patty is one amazing woman! The work she has done for children in this country is second to none. I wish her all the happiness in the world along with her family.
November 2, 2023
A painfully beautiful story about a mother’s dedication to bringing her son home. Patty and Joy have a way with words that paints the agonizing journey it took to find Jacob. The strength of the Wetterlings, victims, and those with hope is unmatched
October 22, 2023
So heartbreaking good
January 25, 2024
I finished the book last night and waited to write the review until today.
Dear Jacob,
I am so sorry for the brutal way your life was ended. Some adults are evil and deserve the deepest pits of hell. I remember your kidnapping. I remember the fear of children and parents alike. I remember the hope in all of Minnesota that you would somehow be found alive for years upon years. I remember crying when they found your broken body. I am so sorry that some humans suck.
Dear Patty,
Thank you for taking the tragedy that happened to your family and creating a safer world for children. Know that Minnesota prayed for you and cried for you. While the majority of people in our beautiful state didn't really know Jacob, we knew him. He became so very important to so many different people. Many people do not know how much of your life became dedicated to protecting OUR children. Thank you for this and thank you for writing this book.
Dear Joy,
Thank you for connecting the pieces. I feel that you were pivotal in bringing Jacob home.
I was crying by page 11. Crying for the loss of life and crying for the pain of the Wetterling family. I cried in sadness and in anger. This book is beautifully written. Even though I knew how it ended, I still felt utter despair at the end of the book. This book makes you feel all of the feels.
Dear Jacob,
I am so sorry for the brutal way your life was ended. Some adults are evil and deserve the deepest pits of hell. I remember your kidnapping. I remember the fear of children and parents alike. I remember the hope in all of Minnesota that you would somehow be found alive for years upon years. I remember crying when they found your broken body. I am so sorry that some humans suck.
Dear Patty,
Thank you for taking the tragedy that happened to your family and creating a safer world for children. Know that Minnesota prayed for you and cried for you. While the majority of people in our beautiful state didn't really know Jacob, we knew him. He became so very important to so many different people. Many people do not know how much of your life became dedicated to protecting OUR children. Thank you for this and thank you for writing this book.
Dear Joy,
Thank you for connecting the pieces. I feel that you were pivotal in bringing Jacob home.
I was crying by page 11. Crying for the loss of life and crying for the pain of the Wetterling family. I cried in sadness and in anger. This book is beautifully written. Even though I knew how it ended, I still felt utter despair at the end of the book. This book makes you feel all of the feels.
January 1, 2024
Book Rating: 4.0 stars
A heartbreaking memoir of loss and hope after the kidnapping of her 11-year-old son.
This was an interesting look into the life of a family after a crime is committed. I can see how she wanted to hope. But statistically speaking it was unlikely Jacob was going to come home, and she kind of deluded herself for 25 years.
It was well-written and engaging for the most part.
Narrator Rating: 5 stars
The narrator was excellent, and it felt like a mother telling her own story.
Extra ratings: Fluff - NA Heartfelt- 5/5 Helpful-3/5 Horror -NA Inspiration -2/5 Love aka Romance- NA Mystery - NA Predictability - NA Spice - NA Suspense - NA Tear- 3/5 Thrill - NA Humor-0/5
A heartbreaking memoir of loss and hope after the kidnapping of her 11-year-old son.
This was an interesting look into the life of a family after a crime is committed. I can see how she wanted to hope. But statistically speaking it was unlikely Jacob was going to come home, and she kind of deluded herself for 25 years.
It was well-written and engaging for the most part.
Narrator Rating: 5 stars
The narrator was excellent, and it felt like a mother telling her own story.
Extra ratings: Fluff - NA Heartfelt- 5/5 Helpful-3/5 Horror -NA Inspiration -2/5 Love aka Romance- NA Mystery - NA Predictability - NA Spice - NA Suspense - NA Tear- 3/5 Thrill - NA Humor-0/5
January 22, 2024
5 🌟
This was such a hard but powerful book.
As a kid who grew up in Minnesota during the time that Jacob Wetterling went missing, I grew up hearing about his story + seeing Patty speak. And while the loss of Jacob is so unfortunate, the world is a better place because of the work Patty has done.
This was such a hard but powerful book.
As a kid who grew up in Minnesota during the time that Jacob Wetterling went missing, I grew up hearing about his story + seeing Patty speak. And while the loss of Jacob is so unfortunate, the world is a better place because of the work Patty has done.
January 22, 2024
I knew it would be a difficult read. It was so much more than that. I cried several times. I felt the hope. I feel like I knew Jacob. Finishing it left me drained and raw.
November 6, 2024
My heart breaks for this family. I cannot imagine the pain of losing a child, let alone not knowing what happened to your missing child for 26 years. The fact that this happened in Minnesota makes it all the more powerful for me - talking about how the family would watch Vikings games together, how Patty would visit MSU Mankato, and then the most horrible tragedy struck less than a mile away from home. The trauma inflicted on this family, and anyone who knew Jacob is horrifying.
This was a tough read, especially digging into the details of sex offenders and child pornography, and the conviction of the perpetrators. Patty sharing the reality of her family’s story is so powerful, and I grieve for all the lives impacted by such horrors. But in face of heartbreak, Patty used her grief to make powerful changes to society for the safety of children everywhere. I’m just so sorry that it came at the loss of her son.
“I learned that hope is a verb. It requires movement and doing to make something come true. It carries us and nudges us to do great things.”
Rest easy, Jacob.
This was a tough read, especially digging into the details of sex offenders and child pornography, and the conviction of the perpetrators. Patty sharing the reality of her family’s story is so powerful, and I grieve for all the lives impacted by such horrors. But in face of heartbreak, Patty used her grief to make powerful changes to society for the safety of children everywhere. I’m just so sorry that it came at the loss of her son.
“I learned that hope is a verb. It requires movement and doing to make something come true. It carries us and nudges us to do great things.”
Rest easy, Jacob.
April 21, 2025
I hate to be critical of memoirs because it isn't my lived experience. This book was packed with emotion! The middle kind of lost me when she went more into her journey into politics and non-profits. I understand that timeline is important to her, but it was hard to get through to get back to Jacob's story. it was absolutely crazy reading a book that his close to home. Literally. I am from St. Cloud and heard about Jacob Wetterling my whole childhood. I wasn't living in MN when he was found, but I heard it was breaking news! I'm glad I know all the details of the story now and all of the changes in laws and protections that have been put in place.
August 11, 2024
I can not believe it has been almost 8 years since Jacob was found. I was young when he was abducted, but I remember it. As a mother of a 12 year old, and close in age to Patty when her son was taken, this memoir broke my heart. All minnesotans who followed his disappearance should read. The community support and love that was provided amazes me, along with the diligence and hope of his family and the community that finally brought him home. ❤️ 💔
December 12, 2024
Wow. This book is both terrible and incredible. Not being from Minnesota, I knew nothing about Jacob until I went to college in the town that was forever changed by this 11 year old boy. I am so moved by reading about his story and the life his mother led, dedicated to her hope for his return. Wonderfully written—every Bennie and Minnesotan needs to read this memoir!
December 29, 2024
An absolutely heartbreaking story. I highly recommend to anyone that knows of the story. I remember when they found Jacob’s body but there was so much more that I didn’t know. Patty Wetterling is truly inspiring for all her efforts in finding Jacob and helping other families with missing children.
October 2, 2025
Audio
Displaying 1 - 30 of 465 reviews