Come Spin

by Ashley Christine

It’s time to break out the secrets and spill those beautiful beans. It is time... to unleash the tea.Let’s quit our copycat jobs of being sugarcoated cupcakes and let’s be wedding cakes spiked with cannabis. This chef is sick of the autotune flavors.For once, let’s unstitch every stereotype from our story and be whoever we want to be. For once, let's be free.Let's shatter the webs of definition that have been sewn around us, and let us speak for ourselves.This is your royal invitation to the grand ball of Ashley Christine, the once-in-a-lifetime banquet of legendary literature... legendarily insane, but legendary nonetheless. This will be one of the weirdest books you'll ever read, but you just may walk away feeling like a rebel warrior, because this is a feral call to war. We will fight in the beautiful unbroken war of rebuilding ourselves after the bomb of heartbreak and hellfire was dropped on our being. We are more than our scars, we are the epic stories of everything that's ever happened to us. We are the spinning tops at the center of our galaxies, the core scintillating like an orb of orchids, all memories the movies of ourselves.Never let anyone tell you how you can or cannot feel, or what you should and should not believe. Life is a pilgrimage to the same sleepy place, and it is a short journey. This is your life, make it a theatrical masterpiece. Make it a wild rampage through flaxen and iridescent fields, make it a moonlit montage of marvelous love. Make it a dive through turquoise waters, make it a kiss-drenched saga. Believe in truth and never let go.Be the soul so brave, your cheeks blush with the rosy blossom of a sparkling supernova. Be the soul so suave, your voice sounds as smooth as a hot knife slicing through Irish butter. Be the soul who blasts castles to the ground whenever you blow a kiss. Be the soul who makes Planet Earth’s spine tingle whenever you whisper anything. Be the soul whose confidence makes mirrors feel insecure, the soul whose poise makes mannequins feel inadequate, the soul whose flirting skills are such fire, they could power a sex toy factory for a week with one cheeky wink.Because what’s the point of riding the carousel of normalcy in this circus of society when each one of us is an unrealized Alice waiting to find her very own Wonderland? Slay the Jabberwocky, dance an Irish jig, and take a sip of psychedelic java while you’re at it. Jump out of the elegant portrait in the dusty halls at home and be the warrior queen your cookie-cutter family never saw coming. Shake off your corsage, set fire to your corset, and crawl out of the façade you’ve been forced to wear. We are not swanky little women on our way to swoon in the ballroom, we are Amazonian war princesses ready to rip falsities out of the fabric of reality and rebirth fresh philosophies from the ashes of the ancient past. We are vixen-Viking hybrids on our way to reclaim Valhalla and we are the mist-enshrined heroes of our ancestors’ visions.Today, the peasants speak, the tyrant sits in the pauper’s seat, and the cold and hungry wear a crown. When energy becomes currency, positivity becomes a revolution. We refuse to please the petty whims of a pathetically shallow society. The status quo is a prison, and today, we’re digging ourselves out of the dungeon. Today, Ugly Betty gets to be Barbie. Adventures await your permission and some of the best can be had in the magical realm of a single chapter.This book is the diary of a girl, and then a woman, spanning eighteen years. It is a hodgepodge anthology of my life’s hilarity and hysteria, compacted into bite-sized nuggets of chaos called chapters.

440 pages, Kindle Edition

Published October 20, 2023

About the author

Ashley lives in the heart of beautiful Muskoka, Ontario with her two daughters.