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771 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 27, 2015
“Many people are surprised to learn that, although memory refers to
real experiences, it is also subjective, reflecting an individual’s
personal perspective, not just ‘facts.’ That is why two people often
have different accounts of what happened when they remember and
discuss a past event. Each of us orients to different elements of the
same situation, which directly affects what we take in and what we
leave out. We remember bits and pieces and then put them together
in a manner that makes sense to us, which then becomes our
‘memory.’ Often we remember only the most disturbing and painful,
or the most wonderful and exciting. exciting, bits and pieces because those
elements were the most vivid and intense. Our memory retrieval is
therefore not an exact recall of what happened in an objective sense
(meaning, as if a neutral person were simply filming the event), but a
recall of those elements that we selectively oriented toward and
registered at the time. This chapter will describe the ‘reconstructive’
nature of memory and explore changing how you remember by
intentionally discovering positive elements or resources that you
used but may have forgotten or not focused on before, during, and
after a painful memory.” (p. 532 of the PDF).
[...]
“Although we can never change what happened, how we
remember it can be revised, edited, and modified no matter how long
ago the events happened. You can learn to orient toward and focus
attention not only on the negative but also on the positive aspects of
painful experiences. Doing so will help you face the distressing,
painful parts of the memory in the work of the chapters to come. By
discovering, acknowledging, and embodying the resources you were
able to use, as well as the positive elements surrounding a painful
memory, you are rewriting the story you have remembered over and
over in a particular way up until this point, and this can change your
brain’s memory of what happened. The worksheets that follow will
help you to remember internal and external resources alongside
disturbing aspects and upsetting emotions you felt during the
distressing event. This brings balance to a painful memory and
supports our sense of confidence and mastery.” (p. 538 of the PDF).
Introduction
Section One Getting Started
Chapter 1 Essential Principles
Chapter 2 Orientation for Therapists
Chapter 3 Orientation for Clients
Section Two Basic Concepts and Skills
Chapter 4 The Wisdom of the Body, Lost and Found
Chapter 5 The Language of the Body: Procedural Learning
Chapter 6 Pay Attention: The Orienting Response
Chapter 7 Mindfulness of the Present Moment
Chapter 8 Directed Mindfulness and Neuroplasticity
Chapter 9 The Triune Brain and Information Processing
Chapter 10 Exploring Body Sensation
Chapter 11 Neuroception and the Window of Tolerance
Chapter 12 Three Phases of Therapy
Section Three Phase 1: Developing Resources
Chapter 13 Appreciating Your Strengths: Survival and Creative Resources
Chapter 14 Taking Inventory: Categories of Resources
Chapter 15 Somatic Resources
Chapter 16 Grounding Yourself
Chapter 17 Core Alignment: Working with Posture
Chapter 18 Using Your Breath
Chapter 19 A Somatic Sense of Boundaries
Chapter 20 Developing Missing Resources
Section Four Phase 2: Addressing Memory
Chapter 21 Implicit Memory and Your Resource Repertoire
Chapter 22 Reconstructing Memory: Finding Resources in a Painful Past
Chapter 23 Dual Awareness of Past and Present
Chapter 24 Sliver of Memory
Chapter 25 Restoring Empowering Action
Chapter 26 Recalibrating Your Nervous System: Sensorimotor Sequencing
Chapter 27 Emotions and Animal Defenses
Section Five Phase 3: Moving Forward
Chapter 28 The Legacy of Attachment
Chapter 29 Beliefs and the Body
Chapter 30 Making Sense of Emotions
Chapter 31 Moving through the World: How We Walk
Chapter 32 Boundary Styles in Relationships
Chapter 33 Connecting with Others: Proximity-Seeking Actions
Chapter 34 Play, Pleasure, and Positive Emotions
Chapter 35 Challenging Your Window of Tolerance
Afterword
