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A Trash 'n' Treasures Mystery #1
Antiques Roadkill
Determined to make a new start in her quaint hometown on the banks of the Mississippi, Brandy Borne never dreams she'll become the prime suspect in a murder case. . .
Moving back in with her eccentric, larger-than-life mother, Brandy Borne finds small-town Serenity anything but serene. It seems an unscrupulous antiques dealer has swindled Vivian out of the family's heirlooms. But when he is found run over in a country lane, Brandy becomes Murder Suspect Number One--with her mother coming in a very close second. . .
The list of other suspects is impressive--the victim's business seems to have been based on bilking seniors out of their possessions. And when the Borne "girls" uncover a few very unsavory Serenity secrets, they become targets for a murderer whose favorite hobby seems to be collecting victims.
289 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 1, 2006
187 people are currently reading
1526 people want to read
About the author
Barbara Allan
54 books187 followersBarbara Allan is a pseudonym used by Barbara Collins and Max Allan Collins
Max Allan Collins is a writer of mystery novels, screenplays, comics and historical fiction. Collins has collaborated on numerous short stories with his wife writer Barbara Collins. Together they also write the successful “Trash ‘n’ Treasures” mysteries – their Antiques Flee Market (2008) won the Romantic Times Best Humorous Mystery Novel award in 2009.
There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.
Max Allan Collins is a writer of mystery novels, screenplays, comics and historical fiction. Collins has collaborated on numerous short stories with his wife writer Barbara Collins. Together they also write the successful “Trash ‘n’ Treasures” mysteries – their Antiques Flee Market (2008) won the Romantic Times Best Humorous Mystery Novel award in 2009.
There is more than one author in the Goodreads database with this name.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 242 reviews
August 13, 2013
Rating: 2.5* of five
The Publisher Says: Brandy Borne and her mother Vivian find themselves investigating the murder of a crooked antiques dealer who just happened to take Vivian for all she was worth. Now they are in a race to find the murderer before he or she strikes again because they could very well be next!
My Review: ~meh~
Pleasant enough, I suppose, nothing at all wrong with it except that there's nothing to like. It's mildly amusing. It's a mystery about the same way any book is a mystery, in that one doesn't know how the author's going to wrap it up. But...how spoiled does this sound...I expected more. I wanted to chuckle more, even I don't know even laugh out loud once or twice.
A few smiles, one snicker.
~meh~
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
The Publisher Says: Brandy Borne and her mother Vivian find themselves investigating the murder of a crooked antiques dealer who just happened to take Vivian for all she was worth. Now they are in a race to find the murderer before he or she strikes again because they could very well be next!
My Review: ~meh~
Pleasant enough, I suppose, nothing at all wrong with it except that there's nothing to like. It's mildly amusing. It's a mystery about the same way any book is a mystery, in that one doesn't know how the author's going to wrap it up. But...how spoiled does this sound...I expected more. I wanted to chuckle more, even I don't know even laugh out loud once or twice.
A few smiles, one snicker.
~meh~
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.
May 31, 2011
Do you like mysteries? (Probably or why would you be reading this review)? If so, you might find this one tolerable (or not). The plot was good (but not fantastic), and the antique tips were cute (but not all that necessary). The main character was marginally likeable (but I thought it was odd that the son she was separated from was mentioned only casually). Are you tired of my overuse of parentheses? This is just a glimpse into what is in store for you in this book. The darn things were so distracting I sometimes had to put the book down just so I could prepare myself for the next onslaught. I probably would have liked this book more if I hadn't been so distracted by them.
October 22, 2023
Entertaining mystery listening 🎶🔰
This is a kindle e-book novel from the local library.
She comes home after leaving her husband to her mother. All the antique furniture is gone. How could this happen? Her mother is having dementia issues. She finds that her mother sold them to the local antique dealer. She goes to the local antique store and gets no satisfaction. A phone ☎ call that night 🌙 leads to a dead body in the road and the fun begins. Two dead bodies later the truth comes out leading to the arrest of the killer.
I would recommend this novel and author to 👍 readers of family and friends relationships adventure mystery novels 👍🔰. 2023 👒😀😡🏡💘
This is a kindle e-book novel from the local library.
She comes home after leaving her husband to her mother. All the antique furniture is gone. How could this happen? Her mother is having dementia issues. She finds that her mother sold them to the local antique dealer. She goes to the local antique store and gets no satisfaction. A phone ☎ call that night 🌙 leads to a dead body in the road and the fun begins. Two dead bodies later the truth comes out leading to the arrest of the killer.
I would recommend this novel and author to 👍 readers of family and friends relationships adventure mystery novels 👍🔰. 2023 👒😀😡🏡💘
December 5, 2021
Dollycas’s Thoughts
I have wanted to start this series for some time and put it on my calendar now to help me hopefully finish my Literary Escapes Reading Challenge this year. I am a stickler for reading books in order I had to start from the beginning.
Brandy Borne has left her son and ex-husband behind and returned to Serenity, Iowa with her blind dog to start over and to her sister, Peggy Sue’s delight for help to keep a handle on their outgoing mother who clearly has mental issues. Issues that have allowed her to be taken advantage of by a shady antique dealer. Shocked to find many of her family’s heirlooms gone Brandy vows to get them back. Before she can do that though, the man is killed and both Brandy and her mother separately were on the scene before the police. That lands them the prime two spots on the suspect list. Heck, at first they thought the other one had done the deed. But it seems Vivian Borne wasn’t the only senior citizen the victim scammed out of their antiques. In fact, there is a pretty nice list and Brandy and her mom put their own lives on the line to solve the case.
I need to first say the authors have a unique writing style that takes a few chapters to get used to. The asides really messed with the flow and for me, the foul language has no place in a cozy mystery. I was shocked when a certain word lit up the page.
I really had a hard time with the main character of Brandy. She seemed to care more about her vintage wardrobe and her blind dog than the son she left behind. That really hurt my heart. I realize this book was written back in the early 2000s but Vivian’s mental illness was jabbed at in humourous ways too many times. She was active in the community, a voice to be previously reckoned with but no one seemed concerned when the woman went off her meds. With Brandy not on the scene, I blame her sister while understanding that taking care of a bi-polar parent can be a handful.
The mystery itself was very interesting but more meandering than a typical cozy mystery with many inconsistencies. It did come to a satisfactory conclusion but the exciting chase to the big reveal just escaped me this time.
I do love the antique theme and the publisher stuck by this series for 14 installments. (The 15th book was published by another publisher this past June.) I am hoping that the downfalls were just growing pains as the husband and wife team of writers were learning to write as a duo. So I am not writing this series off, it wasn’t totally “roadkill”. I plan to read Antiques Maul next year for my Literary Escapes Challenge. with high hopes.
I have wanted to start this series for some time and put it on my calendar now to help me hopefully finish my Literary Escapes Reading Challenge this year. I am a stickler for reading books in order I had to start from the beginning.
Brandy Borne has left her son and ex-husband behind and returned to Serenity, Iowa with her blind dog to start over and to her sister, Peggy Sue’s delight for help to keep a handle on their outgoing mother who clearly has mental issues. Issues that have allowed her to be taken advantage of by a shady antique dealer. Shocked to find many of her family’s heirlooms gone Brandy vows to get them back. Before she can do that though, the man is killed and both Brandy and her mother separately were on the scene before the police. That lands them the prime two spots on the suspect list. Heck, at first they thought the other one had done the deed. But it seems Vivian Borne wasn’t the only senior citizen the victim scammed out of their antiques. In fact, there is a pretty nice list and Brandy and her mom put their own lives on the line to solve the case.
I need to first say the authors have a unique writing style that takes a few chapters to get used to. The asides really messed with the flow and for me, the foul language has no place in a cozy mystery. I was shocked when a certain word lit up the page.
I really had a hard time with the main character of Brandy. She seemed to care more about her vintage wardrobe and her blind dog than the son she left behind. That really hurt my heart. I realize this book was written back in the early 2000s but Vivian’s mental illness was jabbed at in humourous ways too many times. She was active in the community, a voice to be previously reckoned with but no one seemed concerned when the woman went off her meds. With Brandy not on the scene, I blame her sister while understanding that taking care of a bi-polar parent can be a handful.
The mystery itself was very interesting but more meandering than a typical cozy mystery with many inconsistencies. It did come to a satisfactory conclusion but the exciting chase to the big reveal just escaped me this time.
I do love the antique theme and the publisher stuck by this series for 14 installments. (The 15th book was published by another publisher this past June.) I am hoping that the downfalls were just growing pains as the husband and wife team of writers were learning to write as a duo. So I am not writing this series off, it wasn’t totally “roadkill”. I plan to read Antiques Maul next year for my Literary Escapes Challenge. with high hopes.
June 23, 2017
This first book in the Trash 'N' Treasures series sets everything up, and keeps you wanting more.
After ending her marriage with a stupid action, Brandy Borne is back in her old hometown, living with her sanity challenged mother. There's an antiques dealer ripping off old people, and like always in these things, the punishment for being a jerk is death.
The mother, Vivian, reads a lot of mysteries, and tries to solve this one, while Brandy tries to rein her in.
Great stuff.
After ending her marriage with a stupid action, Brandy Borne is back in her old hometown, living with her sanity challenged mother. There's an antiques dealer ripping off old people, and like always in these things, the punishment for being a jerk is death.
The mother, Vivian, reads a lot of mysteries, and tries to solve this one, while Brandy tries to rein her in.
Great stuff.
September 17, 2024
I read this for an upcoming cozy mystery club I joined. The writing just wasn't to my liking. I found the storyline boring & the characters were not relatable. The rambling over descriptions felt like sad attempts for filler.
January 29, 2021
This book was ok, but the writing style annoyed me with its overuse of parenthetical comments. The unending side comments were distracting and never contained anything of value to the story. At least not in the first 50 or so pages. After that I just skipped over anything inside parentheses and I enjoyed the book a bit more.
June 2, 2011
Truly, in rating this I'm between 'it was ok' and 'didn't like'. I've read novels by Max Collins before, but none by just Barbara Allan, who I think is mostly known for short stuff. There are two main things that annoyed me about this novel. The first is that the main character, Brandy, has just moved back in with her mother after a divorce ends her 10 yr marriage. We learn that the marriage ended after her husband found out about a one-night-stand affair Brandy had with an old high school boyfriend during a reunion. She leaves her 10 yr old son with the mad dad and scoots back to her Mom in another state. During most of the novel, Brandy never appears to have any remorse over the one night stand, the loss of her marriage, and only mentions or thinks of her son when another character asks about him. I think that happened 2x. So, right away I find this character unsympathetic! I didn't need her to weep all over the pages every chapter, but this Brandy was wholly unemotional about this, but terribly concerned with her clothing and shoes. The second item I found frustrating was that the same character often speaks directly to the reader in either parenthetical asides or in end of chapter snippets of info on antique buying/selling. All too often the story was broken by one or more of these asides, sometimes more than once on a single page! The mystery of the book, while note hard to deduce, is sufficient. I don't plan to read the next 2 in the series.
March 13, 2016
Well well well, it has been some time since I tried a new series in the cozy mystery genre. For most of the book, I had the rating pegged at 2/5. But the story came good in the last few chapters. The book has a few logical hiccups. The behavior of the main heroine, the cops, the murderer, were unconvincing, if not far fetching. Some of the adventures ran into dead ends or were too isolated to belong really to this book. This is the book that most resembles to a Frankenstein novel other than the Frankenstein book itself( which by the way, I haven't, nor will ever, read). It seems to be cobbled from random pieces and seems glued with spit, instead of plain ole elbow grease. I'm still caught unawares regarding the rating of this book. It's way too low. I suspect that most readers have more cons in their reviews of this book than I've had. Fair enough. I'll end my review by saying that, if you're not enjoying the book by the time the murder is committed, drop it like a stone. That's all.
February 8, 2012
This was a DNF for me. I kept thinking I should enjoy it, I liked the premise (lots of antiques, small mid-western town, women as investigators) but it fell apart for me. I think the reason I couldn't finish it was the interruptions. The main character is Brandy and she tells us most of the background and fills in the history of her life and life in her town. But, she doesn't seem to be able to tell a story without at least one if not three or five side comments and stories. Often stacked one on another.
For example, she might be telling something about her mother, say she isn't reliable, then (well, she really isn't) (did I every tell you about . . .) It started really bothering me.
The other thing I can often overlook is the obsession with clothes, shoes and purses. But added to the constant conversational interruptions I just gave up.
For example, she might be telling something about her mother, say she isn't reliable, then (well, she really isn't) (did I every tell you about . . .) It started really bothering me.
The other thing I can often overlook is the obsession with clothes, shoes and purses. But added to the constant conversational interruptions I just gave up.
May 22, 2011
Read the free Kindle edition, and while cozy little mysteries aren't my favorite, I enjoyed it. It was a quick entertaining read, I even bought the second in the series right after finishing it. The in depth clothes and brand rambling was annoying but not enough to make me give up on it. (I just skimmed over those sentences really really quickly). I found myself smiling at the humor and the main character was someone I liked.
Read
June 3, 2018Great book. I have downloaded about 6 books in this series but found a new author C.J. Carmichael reading the first book in the trilogy.
September 29, 2009
Reading an article about e-books recently, I found myself thinking, "Why would anyone prefer to read a book on an electronic screen rather than on paper?" Then I realized--I was reading this article on my cell phone.
For all the decades of my adult life, until recently, I tended to spend a significant amount of time daily in the company of books. I usually had three or four going at once--often one on science, one on poetry or writing, a history or biography, and the brain candy I lovingly refer to as "trashy mystery novels." The table beside my favorite chair has always been cluttered with books.
Now that end table has been clear for some time, except for a couple of magazines (which I'll never get around to reading) and my coffee cup. I'm halfway through The Political Brain, by Drew Westen, which is interesting; however, I probably won't finish it until I have a free weekend (whatever that is). I simply don't set aside time for books any more. I still have the habit of keeping a mystery by the bed--nothing that takes much mental energy--and reading a few paragraphs before drifting off to sleep every night. That may be the only time all day I touch an actual book.
However, I'm better informed and more stimulated by the written word than ever before. The time I used to spend with books, I now spend with computers, in one form or another. I read constantly and have become a real news junkie. (Why read about the past when we're living tomorrow's history?) By the time I check all my favorite web pages, blogs, and mobile news sites, there's no time for print media.
This is just a phase I'm going through, I'm sure. When I retire, the table by my chair will probably fill up with books again. I hope. I'd like to have time to supplement my online reading with actual, old-fashioned paper-and-ink. Meanwhile, though, I'm fascinated with the notion of being a part of the biggest revolution in human communication since Gutenberg.
Oh--about Antiques Roadkill--it was fine. However, the husband-and-wife team who call themselves "Barbara Allen" are going to have to churn out books in this "cozy" series a little faster if they hope to build an audience.
For all the decades of my adult life, until recently, I tended to spend a significant amount of time daily in the company of books. I usually had three or four going at once--often one on science, one on poetry or writing, a history or biography, and the brain candy I lovingly refer to as "trashy mystery novels." The table beside my favorite chair has always been cluttered with books.
Now that end table has been clear for some time, except for a couple of magazines (which I'll never get around to reading) and my coffee cup. I'm halfway through The Political Brain, by Drew Westen, which is interesting; however, I probably won't finish it until I have a free weekend (whatever that is). I simply don't set aside time for books any more. I still have the habit of keeping a mystery by the bed--nothing that takes much mental energy--and reading a few paragraphs before drifting off to sleep every night. That may be the only time all day I touch an actual book.
However, I'm better informed and more stimulated by the written word than ever before. The time I used to spend with books, I now spend with computers, in one form or another. I read constantly and have become a real news junkie. (Why read about the past when we're living tomorrow's history?) By the time I check all my favorite web pages, blogs, and mobile news sites, there's no time for print media.
This is just a phase I'm going through, I'm sure. When I retire, the table by my chair will probably fill up with books again. I hope. I'd like to have time to supplement my online reading with actual, old-fashioned paper-and-ink. Meanwhile, though, I'm fascinated with the notion of being a part of the biggest revolution in human communication since Gutenberg.
Oh--about Antiques Roadkill--it was fine. However, the husband-and-wife team who call themselves "Barbara Allen" are going to have to churn out books in this "cozy" series a little faster if they hope to build an audience.
February 7, 2014
I am surprised by how much I enjoyed this book. I've never thought much about the "antiquing mystery" genre, but I'm so glad I picked this up. The main character is fun, sarcastic, smart, and a really lovable character. Her dysfunctional family really adds to the book and are also characters you can really like (even prissy Peggy-Sue). The mystery was different and very interesting, especially when the main character is first suspected of murder then becomes a target victim. I love the snarky, smart writing style (with many uses of "sidebar" parentheses). I will definitely continue with this series to see more of these characters.
March 17, 2011
Cute little mystery. The writing was very casual and pretty funny. The author(s) isn't shy about letting us know all the heroine's parenthetical thoughts. Brandy, the leading lady, is very believable. It wasn't my favorite book of all time, but it was cute and I'd read the rest of the Trash 'n' Treasures Mystery if they ever got cheap enough on Kindle.
May 6, 2011
This book nearly got thrown at the wall thanks to the author's handling of bipolar disorder (whee it makes you kooky and unpredictable! Uh, no), but I persevered. It's good for what it is: a cute, cosy mystery, and I'll probably read the rest. I'm reading more for the bipolar mom than the protagonist though.
June 6, 2013
A mentally ill hoarder first moves in with with her mentally ill hoarder mother, and then solves crimes in her spare time, while caring for her elderly blind dog that pisses all over the house. No thank you.
May 10, 2009
These make me laugh out loud at times. Silly but fun.
February 1, 2021
I really enjoyed this book. The characters made me laugh and I did feel a lot of sympathy for Brandy in dealing with her mother’s mental illness.
The authors treatment of mental illness was well done with grace and laughter and sympathy.
Will get the sequel and I am hoping Brandy will be able to get resolution with her ex and get her son back.
The authors treatment of mental illness was well done with grace and laughter and sympathy.
Will get the sequel and I am hoping Brandy will be able to get resolution with her ex and get her son back.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 22, 2017
This book has a different writing style than many cozy mysteries, at times I wasn't sure I liked it and at other times I laughed out loud. Not sure that cozy mysteries are humorous like that, but I'll give the next one a shot.
April 10, 2020
Why the fuck is everyone in the reviews going on about the goddamn Prozac? It's not fucking meth!
May 2, 2021
Enjoyable...
March 27, 2012
Brandy heads home to live with mom after her divorce is final. Her mother needs someone to kind of keep an eye on her and make sure she is taking her medication. When she arrives home she finds out that a local antique dealer had swindled her mom out of many of her antiques, taking advantage of her during one of her spells.
Brandy confronts the man at a Red Hat Society event. Shortly after that confrontation the antique dealer winds up dead and Brandy's mom is a suspect. When things start hitting closer to home, Brandy is determined to help the police find out who also wants her dead.
I really liked this story. I love the narrative style and the little asides that the author gives from the characters perspective. I have the next one in the series already and look forward to reading the others in the series.
Fun read!
Brandy confronts the man at a Red Hat Society event. Shortly after that confrontation the antique dealer winds up dead and Brandy's mom is a suspect. When things start hitting closer to home, Brandy is determined to help the police find out who also wants her dead.
I really liked this story. I love the narrative style and the little asides that the author gives from the characters perspective. I have the next one in the series already and look forward to reading the others in the series.
Fun read!
May 28, 2011
I have found this first in the series novel to be fun, entertaining, and a good mystery to boot. We are introduced to Brandy Borne returning home to live with her mother, Vivian, after a divorce. Vivian has some challenges, Manic Depression for one.
Brandy discovers that Mom's home has been pilfered by an unscrupulous Antique buyer. Next thing you know, The Antique buyer is dead and both Vivian and Brandy have confessed.
This book moves at a sonic pace and I thoroughly enjoyed the voyage.
Brandy discovers that Mom's home has been pilfered by an unscrupulous Antique buyer. Next thing you know, The Antique buyer is dead and both Vivian and Brandy have confessed.
This book moves at a sonic pace and I thoroughly enjoyed the voyage.
September 1, 2015
A so-so mystery. A quick and easy read. Good to have when on a day trip or on a rainy day. But not the best of the genre. It was a little annoying however. It was of the type that like to give you tips all through the book.
However, it had a good solid mystery story and characters that were entertaining.
However, it had a good solid mystery story and characters that were entertaining.
April 16, 2020
I've had this sitting on my Kindle for NINE YEARS. Oy. The impetus for finally reading it was getting a review copy of the forthcoming installment. Of course, after nine years, there's been quite a few other installments so I'm sure I'll be lost anyway, lol. Sadly, I don't have high hopes now that I've read the first book.
The mystery was decent, nothing fantastic. The characters are over the top and super annoying. Brandy, the "heroine" is immature, irresponsible, shallow, and careless. We hear a teeny tiny, eensy weensy, itty bit about the husband she cheated on, who is now divorcing her, and the 10 year old son she left behind with his father. We hear an ungodly amount about her clothes, her mother and sister's clothes, and her friend's clothes. The brand name dropping excessive, the description of clothing was excessive, and I never want to read another description of a character's clothing. Ever.
The author's voice took me almost halfway through the book to get used to; it's definitely an acquired taste. She uses parentheses like they are going extinct, jumps around and rambles a ton, and there's the excessive emphasis on clothing and fashion.
"In the back of the car, however, hanging from a rod, were some of the clothes I just couldn’t bring myself to sell on eBay: a black Stella McCartney satin bomber jacket with tons of zippers; a black Chanel loose-weaved wool jacket with silver chains and frayed edges; and a black (okay, I’d been trying to hide my weight) Versace low-cut spandex dress (the one Angelina Jolie wore to the Oscars … except a tad bigger)."
"I suppose I should interrupt myself again to explain that my mother has always had a touch of the dramatic. She’d been a tall, slender, beautiful blonde in high school (willowy, they used to call it) who had snagged the lead in every play since kindergarten. Her plans to go to Hollywood had changed when she abruptly married her high school sweetheart (my dad, Jonathan—remember him?) on the eve of his marching off to war."
"I despised these women, each of whom had at one time or another betrayed my sister. The ringleader of the cattiest clique this side of the Mississippi was Robin (wearing the stodgier side of Anne Klein); she once stole Peggy Sue’s fiancé, then threw him over. Lana (looking silly in Lilly Pulitzer—where’s a palm tree when you need one?) had had my sister kicked off the Pom-Pon Squad (at the time called Pom-Pom, before anyone realized it meant “whore” in the Philippines) for being “too fat,” which had sent Peggy Sue on an anorexic cycle. And my “favorite,” Connie (hiding her heft under a voluminous Eileen Fisher dress; it wasn’t working), had once spread a vicious rumor that my sister was pregnant, when Peggy Sue studied in France her freshman year of college."
Those are mild but accurate samples.
Anyway, the book did slowly engage me and I finished it. It was okay, nothing wonderful. I do not have high hopes for the review book on my Kindle. At least I know not to expect much.
The mystery was decent, nothing fantastic. The characters are over the top and super annoying. Brandy, the "heroine" is immature, irresponsible, shallow, and careless. We hear a teeny tiny, eensy weensy, itty bit about the husband she cheated on, who is now divorcing her, and the 10 year old son she left behind with his father. We hear an ungodly amount about her clothes, her mother and sister's clothes, and her friend's clothes. The brand name dropping excessive, the description of clothing was excessive, and I never want to read another description of a character's clothing. Ever.
The author's voice took me almost halfway through the book to get used to; it's definitely an acquired taste. She uses parentheses like they are going extinct, jumps around and rambles a ton, and there's the excessive emphasis on clothing and fashion.
"In the back of the car, however, hanging from a rod, were some of the clothes I just couldn’t bring myself to sell on eBay: a black Stella McCartney satin bomber jacket with tons of zippers; a black Chanel loose-weaved wool jacket with silver chains and frayed edges; and a black (okay, I’d been trying to hide my weight) Versace low-cut spandex dress (the one Angelina Jolie wore to the Oscars … except a tad bigger)."
"I suppose I should interrupt myself again to explain that my mother has always had a touch of the dramatic. She’d been a tall, slender, beautiful blonde in high school (willowy, they used to call it) who had snagged the lead in every play since kindergarten. Her plans to go to Hollywood had changed when she abruptly married her high school sweetheart (my dad, Jonathan—remember him?) on the eve of his marching off to war."
"I despised these women, each of whom had at one time or another betrayed my sister. The ringleader of the cattiest clique this side of the Mississippi was Robin (wearing the stodgier side of Anne Klein); she once stole Peggy Sue’s fiancé, then threw him over. Lana (looking silly in Lilly Pulitzer—where’s a palm tree when you need one?) had had my sister kicked off the Pom-Pon Squad (at the time called Pom-Pom, before anyone realized it meant “whore” in the Philippines) for being “too fat,” which had sent Peggy Sue on an anorexic cycle. And my “favorite,” Connie (hiding her heft under a voluminous Eileen Fisher dress; it wasn’t working), had once spread a vicious rumor that my sister was pregnant, when Peggy Sue studied in France her freshman year of college."
Those are mild but accurate samples.
Anyway, the book did slowly engage me and I finished it. It was okay, nothing wonderful. I do not have high hopes for the review book on my Kindle. At least I know not to expect much.
December 18, 2017
Another novel I wanted to like but just didn't. I actually had to check to see if it was self published (It's not) because the style was so annoying (I couldn't believe it was from a publisher). I can't even fathom who thought this style was a good one (I can see I'm not the only one who hated it). All these parenthesis? That's how the whole book is written. Early on I counted up 28 in under three pages (in fact some were back to back) (no seriously back to back).
The annoying style was coupled with Brandy (main pov character) being not particularly likable. She's moving back to her hometown (with her elderly blind diabetic dog) to move in with her mentally ill mother (an actress who often goes off her meds, and hey have I made my point yet about the parenthesis?) because Brandy's recently divorced. Mostly because she came to her h.s. class reunion and cheated on her husband. this is made worse by the fact she doesn't seem to miss her son much. Also she breaks the fourth wall constantly and hares off on tangents. And she's rather estranged from her much older sister and in ways I'm with her sister about how Brandy seems their mom referring to her in disparaging terms about her mental illness.
As for the mystery, it wasn't bad (but I skimmed so much). Max Collins is a rather disreputable antiques dealer. He bought all of Vivian's (Brandy's mom) heirlooms for a pittance when she was in a maniac phase. I wasn't sure if he knew she was mentally ill or not but Brandy thinks it's obvious that he took advantage of Vivian, and I have known antiques dealers who have done that to the elderly. Naturally he's murdered and it looks like Vivian did it.
Like I said the mystery wasn't bad but the book was like a cheese grater on skin. I don't see me reading more.
The annoying style was coupled with Brandy (main pov character) being not particularly likable. She's moving back to her hometown (with her elderly blind diabetic dog) to move in with her mentally ill mother (an actress who often goes off her meds, and hey have I made my point yet about the parenthesis?) because Brandy's recently divorced. Mostly because she came to her h.s. class reunion and cheated on her husband. this is made worse by the fact she doesn't seem to miss her son much. Also she breaks the fourth wall constantly and hares off on tangents. And she's rather estranged from her much older sister and in ways I'm with her sister about how Brandy seems their mom referring to her in disparaging terms about her mental illness.
As for the mystery, it wasn't bad (but I skimmed so much). Max Collins is a rather disreputable antiques dealer. He bought all of Vivian's (Brandy's mom) heirlooms for a pittance when she was in a maniac phase. I wasn't sure if he knew she was mentally ill or not but Brandy thinks it's obvious that he took advantage of Vivian, and I have known antiques dealers who have done that to the elderly. Naturally he's murdered and it looks like Vivian did it.
Like I said the mystery wasn't bad but the book was like a cheese grater on skin. I don't see me reading more.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 22, 2024
OkHm 2.5 ⭐ but since I didn't think the killer was the killer, it gets 3⭐. If I could get the rest of the series for free also I might read it. If I had to pay, no way.
Humorous but a hit you over the head. I was ok with the (parentheses to show inner monologue) but it was quite often.
Clearly book 1 to set up a series.
Must have been when depression and (dementia? alzheimer's?) was sort of out in the open 20 odd yrs ago at publishing date because of *constant references* to the two main characters being heavily medicated.
This could explain why Brandy wouldn't have her son with her so she could follow her "crazy" but always been eccentric actor mom into danger.
What stuck with me was an expendable character, an accidental murder, a divorced mom who had a (?life-saving) hysterectomy and was sad that her life as a mom was over especially if she ever found another hubby who'd want a family. Gosh!
Again, must have been a main character gave up being a mom after her divorce plot point that was edited out or glossed over. I mean, what was the point in talking about that?
Maybe it was a reference to hot local cop who is obviously interested in Brandy.
But I think it was a missed opportunity or Editor said, missing! toss it in here! because they spent a lot of time explaining how the friend gave Brandy a whole makeover in the hospital, so no matter what she looked different and switched beds with the complaining roomie. Why spend time with the whole mom story as if it wasn't important?
Humorous but a hit you over the head. I was ok with the (parentheses to show inner monologue) but it was quite often.
Clearly book 1 to set up a series.
Must have been when depression and (dementia? alzheimer's?) was sort of out in the open 20 odd yrs ago at publishing date because of *constant references* to the two main characters being heavily medicated.
This could explain why Brandy wouldn't have her son with her so she could follow her "crazy" but always been eccentric actor mom into danger.
What stuck with me was an expendable character, an accidental murder, a divorced mom who had a (?life-saving) hysterectomy and was sad that her life as a mom was over especially if she ever found another hubby who'd want a family. Gosh!
Again, must have been a main character gave up being a mom after her divorce plot point that was edited out or glossed over. I mean, what was the point in talking about that?
Maybe it was a reference to hot local cop who is obviously interested in Brandy.
But I think it was a missed opportunity or Editor said, missing! toss it in here! because they spent a lot of time explaining how the friend gave Brandy a whole makeover in the hospital, so no matter what she looked different and switched beds with the complaining roomie. Why spend time with the whole mom story as if it wasn't important?
abandoned
February 2, 2026I really wanted to like Antiques Roadkill, but unfortunately it just wasn’t for me. The biggest issue I had was the constant breaking of the fourth wall. Instead of feeling clever or charming, it repeatedly pulled me out of the story. Every time I started to settle in, the narration would remind me that I was reading a book, and that made it hard to stay immersed.
I ended up giving up around page 63, which is probably right when things were about to pick up. Still, I just couldn’t bring myself to keep going. I have a personal rule where I allow myself one DNF (did not finish) per month, and even though it’s still very early in the month, this book claimed that slot without much hesitation. Sometimes forcing yourself to read something you’re not enjoying just kills your motivation to read altogether, and this felt like one of those times.
Another problem for me was the characters. I couldn’t connect to any of them, and without that emotional hook, the mystery itself didn’t have much weight. I kept waiting for someone—anyone—to grab my interest, but it never happened. The dialogue and character interactions didn’t give me enough reason to care about what was happening or what might happen next.
There’s a quote a librarian once told me that has stuck with me over the years: “If you don’t like it by the end of chapter one, stop reading.” As book lovers, we all know librarians are usually right. While I did push myself past that point, I probably shouldn’t have. By the time I set the book down, it was clear this just wasn’t a story meant for me.
I ended up giving up around page 63, which is probably right when things were about to pick up. Still, I just couldn’t bring myself to keep going. I have a personal rule where I allow myself one DNF (did not finish) per month, and even though it’s still very early in the month, this book claimed that slot without much hesitation. Sometimes forcing yourself to read something you’re not enjoying just kills your motivation to read altogether, and this felt like one of those times.
Another problem for me was the characters. I couldn’t connect to any of them, and without that emotional hook, the mystery itself didn’t have much weight. I kept waiting for someone—anyone—to grab my interest, but it never happened. The dialogue and character interactions didn’t give me enough reason to care about what was happening or what might happen next.
There’s a quote a librarian once told me that has stuck with me over the years: “If you don’t like it by the end of chapter one, stop reading.” As book lovers, we all know librarians are usually right. While I did push myself past that point, I probably shouldn’t have. By the time I set the book down, it was clear this just wasn’t a story meant for me.
September 21, 2020
Recently divorced thirty-year-old Brandy Borne moves back to her hometown of Serenity, Iowa along the Mississippi River. News travels fast in small towns, so it doesn't take long for all the locals to know that Brandy is once again living with her mother in the house she grew up in. Brandy's older sister, Peggy Sue, is actually quite relieved that Brandy will now be available to help keep watch on their eccentric and dramatic mother, Vivian, who loves the spotlight, but doesn't always think about consequences before acting upon her wild ideas. Before long, Brandy and Vivian are drawn into a murder investigation revolving around an antiques dealer who took advantage of Vivian when she was feeling unwell and bought all of the expensive antiques in her home for a very small amount of money. Unfortunately, shortly before the man was murdered, Brandy had confronted him in a very public setting, which put her and her mother in a precarious situation after his body is found.
This was a fun book with a good mystery and a lot of entertaining and quirky characters. My husband and I recently visited Muscatine, Iowa, the cute and historic town along the Mississippi River where the authors of this series live and the town of Serenity is based upon. :-)
This was a fun book with a good mystery and a lot of entertaining and quirky characters. My husband and I recently visited Muscatine, Iowa, the cute and historic town along the Mississippi River where the authors of this series live and the town of Serenity is based upon. :-)
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