Loser. Outcast. Freak. At seventeen, the names no longer hurt Vince Sanford. He's different from others at his school and always has been -- the pep rallies, school dances, name-brand clothes and football games and fifth quarter parties, none of that interests him anymore.
There was a time when he did fit in, when his best friend had been Eric Somers, the most popular boy in school. They lived around the block from each other and were inseparable. It was never a question of was Eric eating over or was Vince staying the night -- they were one soul in two bodies, sharing two homes, two lives.
But something happened between them the summer before high school that tore their friendship apart, leaving Vince with an anger, a hatred, that he can't control. Now Eric wants back in his life again but Vince is afraid to give him a second chance.
An author of gay erotic/romantic fiction, J.M. Snyder began in self-publishing and worked with Amber Allure, Aspen Mountain, eXcessica, and Torquere Presses.
Snyder's highly erotic short gay fiction has been published online at Amazon Shorts, Eros Monthly, Ruthie's Club, and Tit-Elation, as well as in anthologies by Alyson Books, Aspen Mountain, Cleis Press, eXcessica Publishing, Lethe Press, and Ravenous Romance.
In 2010, Snyder founded JMS Books LLC, a royalty-paying queer small press that publishes in both electronic and print format. For more information on newest releases and submission guidelines, please visit JMS Books LLC online.
Wow, I need to read something really light after this one. Talk about feeling completely wrung out. This story's definitely not for the faint of heart.
The majority of the book is a description of the sadistic shit that Vince pictures doing to Eric to make him hurt as bad as Vince has hurt inside since his confession of love to Eric goes about as wrong as can possibly be imagined four years earlier.
Part of me just wanted to hug Vince really close until he cried it all out and finally, finally let out every last ounce of the mountain of hurt and anger that was killing his very soul.
Another part of me wanted to lock the sick little fuck up in a mental ward and put him on some very serious medication before he completely lost it and sliced and diced Eric up for real. It was a real toss up. I'd say about 60/40.
Powerful. Emotional. Disturbing. I know all of the blood rushed from my face when Vince said the "D" word the morning after releasing his onslaught of violence directly at Eric.
I want to say this was a 'good' read, but 'intense' is a much better description. In spite of how extremely screwed up this book was, somehow I really felt for and liked both characters. Go figure? Anyway, read it at your own risk. This one's definitely not 'fluffy'.
Yes, spoilers. I warned, and you do whatever you feel like doing with that little piece of information.
Vince and Eric were best friends when they were kids, and when they were fourteen, Vince admitted to Eric he's in love with him. His friend laughed in his face. In Eric's defense: if my best friend confessed to being in love with me at that age, I'm not sure my reaction would have been much better. I didn't even know the meaning of the word 'love' and let's be honest: how many kids that age are sure about their sexual orientation, when most of them haven't even touched somebody of the opposite sex.
Anyway, it's safe to say that little fiasco put an end to their friendship (well duh), and Vince becomes some kind of emo loner guy with odd hair, who never got over his feelings for his ex-best friend. They ignore each other for 3 years and then they suddenly meet up again while they are taking out the trash. Dun dun duuuun!
Vince's thoughts are very violent, dark and moody and he spends his days jerking off obsessing about Eric and all the things he'd like to do to him, going from beating the crap out of him to effing the crap out of him. (I really don't want to go there)
Now Eric it trying to worm (lawl) his way back into his life and Vince is trying everything to keep the other boy at a distance. Of course there is only one outcome.
This book gets pretty graphic on the violence (mostly in Vinceville), but nothing I couldn't handle. The guys don't get any further than a few kisses and some 'accidental' crotch brushing. I'm telling you this because I know not everybody will enjoy this book.
Vince and Eric have been friends from birth. Early in their teens, Vince realizes two things - he is gay and he is in love with Eric. As you can imagine with most teens, when Vince bares his soul to Eric, Eric did not react the way Vince had envisioned. This colored both of their high school lives and relationships as they both went their separate ways.
Vince's pain and anger was so deep and real in this book - it was honestly hard to read. At one point I thought it was too over the top, with the visions of read and violence, but then I remembered what it was like to be an unloved, alone and emotional teen.
The book continues as Eric re-inserts himself into Vince's life as Vince tries to protect himself and his heart by fighting Eric's friendship and attention.
My recommendation for this book - it is hard to read - it cuts to the emotional hidden teen in us all, yet it is compelling, well written and worth the read.
Can’t you see the way I’m hurting inside? What will it take to make you feel it too? This hurt, this pain, this hate ?
Vince is a social outcast. He looks different, he acts different and he thinks differently from the people around him. And he has no friends. Not since he was 14, when his best friend in the world, Eric, betrayed him. Now Eric wants back in his life and the lonely but safe cocoon Vince has made for himself is in danger of breaking. But Vince is desperate to hold on to it.
This was FANTASTIC! It was raw, emotional and engaging. I loved how Snyder wasn’t afraid to show Vince’s dark side and the fact that he takes an active part in being pushed in the role of a loner, by shutting people out (like his parents). I can imagine it’ll be hard to swallow for some people, since the story is very dark and Vince’s sexual fantasies of his ‘pay back’ to Eric are a bit disturbing at times. Still, I could relate to Vince and felt for him. Passionately.
Vince is a very different read from what I am used to. It's one of Snyder's darkest novels.
Vince, the main character, is somewhat of a social outcast, but that's a choice that he's made for himself. Because of a memory from his past, he doesn't form close relationships with anyone and generally likes to keep to himself. He doesn't even feel a connection to his family. Vince is a very realistic and relatable character. However, he also has a lot of dark sexual fantasies born from the fact that his first experience with love was painful and seemingly one-sided.
Eric was Vince's best friend in the past. They were inseparable as children but along the way, Eric hurts Vince and since then, Vince has kept to himself and Eric goes on to form new friendships and circles. However, no one was as good a friend as Vince was and he wants to renew their relationship. Despite the fact that Vince keeps him at arms length now, he's persistent and that's admirable.
The interactions between Vince and Eric are fresh and raw. They were characters that I was very invested in. The story never drags and pulls you into their world, into Vince's pain, and Eric's resolve. I'm hoping for a sequel because I love the characters and the ending was much like a beginning. If you're looking for something different, Vince is a recommended read.
Another story with teen characters by J.M. Snyder. Vince and Eric were best friends. But when a guy begins to become a man, at 14 years old, then Vince discovers that his feelings for Eric are not of friendship. He is in love with his pal and he dreams the love is mutual. And he is careless and daring and he declares his love expecting to be declared back... but Eric laughs, true, it was an histerical laught, but a 14 years old guy is frail, and easily scared, and for Vince is like a stab in the heart. He runs away and never turns back...
Vince's life changes. He becomes introverts and reserved, the classical troubled guy that everyone at school avoids. Eric instead, solar and friendly, is the best athlete and the perfect next door boy. But not always the appearence is true, and now, few months before college, Vince has right in mind what he wants to do and Eric... Eric only knows that he wants his friend back. Only a friend? Maybe more. But Vince doens't want to forget that damned laugh, doesn't want to forgive, cause he doesn't want to be wounded again.
A very tender and naive tale, about love and youth, about feelings that seem so strong when you are so young. Vince is a very interesting character, maybe with an hint of Dom-to-be in him, like Eric has a true submissive nature. The story has not a real end, so you can choose the end you prefer... love at 17 years old is forever, life has not yet seeped.
Wow! This was an very emotional read. Vince's emotional visions are down right scary and I loved every minute of it. Love and betrayel, how does one get past it when the aftermath is what creates who you are? When the wound it causes festers and never heals?
This author can write about situations that can become unpleasant, but they also ring quite real.
Vince is 17 and is all darkness. He's ex-best friend and the focus of Vince's hate/love is Eric, who's all light in looks and attitude. When they were 14, Vince confessed Eric he loved him and Eric laughed in his face. From that moment on their friendship is shattered, Vince never comes close to Eric again, until a faithful night when they meet behind an alley and they start to reconnect. It's Eric who becomes more persistent, while Vince wants to keep the distance.
Vince is a ball of hurt, rage, anger. As all teens, the whole world revolves around their inner world. Vince holds on to his rage and hate for Eric, a hate that is exacerbated by his attraction to the other boy. In his mind Vince hurts, dominates Eric, his sexual fantasies are dark.
Vince has no friends, he's hostile to his family, but he's also driven by his passion for art and movies. He has been admitted to film school in New York on a scholarship. He's not afraid of being far from his family and starting over, he wants that. Eric, who's the golden boy in school, has on the contrary decided not to go to college for the moment.
They reconnect slowly and Vince is reluctant. He doesn't want to give up his anger, he doesn't want to trust again. Eric tries to break through Vince's defences and to get at least a reaction.
For a long time the story is dark and confined to Vince's feelings, while he's working on his negative feelings for Eric, trying to vindicate his broken heart and to understand if what Eric seems to promise is real.
This was a book of two halves - I liked the first half, and found the second creepy, as Vince met up with his childhood sweetheart gone wrong (part 1) and struggled with violent feelings against him (part 2).
4.5 stars Oh, wow, this must be the darkest story from J.M. Snyder that I read so far. Vince is so full of anger and hatred due to the pain that he feels after what Eric did to him (laughed at Vince when the age of 14 years old, Vince told Eric that he loved that best friend of him). I often find myself worry with what he thinks of Eric (the numorous things he wants to do to make Eric feel hurt and in pain). But at the same time, I know that Vince only thinks that due to the pain. Eric on the other hand is one persistent young man and he wants Vince to know that he is sorry and that he actually loves Vince.
Despite this, I find the story VERY engaging; I can't stop reading. The emotional part of it, what Vince feels and how Eric tries to make up for it, just makes my heart squeezed. The only reason why I can't give this a 5 stars is because of that worry in me about Vince's anger. However, the ending leaves an open interpretation -- and I'd like to believe they are going the happy way :).
Vince and Eric were best friends since they were very young. When they were around 14, Vince professed his love to Eric. Stunned, Eric just laughed. Vince was hurt, and became goth. Their lives drifted apart. A meeting in the street at night during their senior years (when they both were doing chores) was their first contact in more than three years. Eric tried to amend their relationship, but Vince kept rejecting him. Despite him still loves Eric. This kept happening for more than a year, with Vince declining every single one of Eric's efforts. Will they ever be friends again, or will they ever be more than friends?
I liked reading the story, but in some parts I felt the story is dragging a bit that I had to skip them. I'm aware that the characters are still young, so they are not stable yet. Still, Vince is abusing himself and Eric. Those who like (IMO, unnecessary) prolonged angst may like this. Not my cup of tea. Still, as we all know, J.M. has a way with words that make us keep reading her stories.
Firstly, I should mention that I actually dislike present tense first person writing (and still do, and indeed did here). However this was a powerfully written piece of fiction so I decided to give it a stronger rating to reflect that. Some might be disturbed by Vince's intensely violent sexual fantasies but I thought they truly captured the passionate nature of teenage emotions. The vacillation between hate and love, brutality and tenderness, these to me spoke believably of Vince's youthful tempestuous nature. I had to wade a bit to overcome my displeasure with the tenses in places; and for goodness sake, I cannot say I appreciated the jump in time between parts 1 & 2, but again, it was all very well-written. The powerful descriptions and turbulent emotions aside I actually found it very suited to the young adult market (I'd say 15+) - it's true that Vince describes certain sadistic sexual fantasies but I found it to be quite an accurate portrayal of teenage passions.
This book turned out to be a disappointment for me. It started out pretty good. I was interested in Vince's thought process. I wasn't bothered by the "darkness" at all. In fact, perhaps that is what made the mood of the book interesting for me. About half way through the book it got really difficult for me to read. I was tired of hearing about Vince's depressed moods. I was tired of reading Vince's ongoing monologue of obsession. I wanted to read action. I wanted him to do something about how he felt.
Also I felt like I never really got to know the characters outside of Vince's brief recollections and fantasies. I knew nothing about Vince, aside from his night time walks and anger at Eric. I felt like this story could have been more. But it wasn't.
The ending was also a let down. This story really faded for me. Which is too bad, because I was excited about it due to the reviews. I found myself skimming towards the end just trying to get through it.
It certainly isn't what I thought it was going to be... I'm enjoying it so far!! I'm not really in to the "erotic" romance novels gay or straight so we'll see how this goes!
Okay... now I'm finished... Let me first say that I loved the story. The "erotic" portions weren't overly done (no sex scenes) which I appreciated. The writing was fantastic, especially for it just being a proof - I think I only found two gramatical errors. Maybe there were more but I was more focused on the character - the character of Vince and his emotions draw you in. The story was fantastic enough to brush over the "erotic" scenes in the book - at least for me.
I will say that as much as I loved the story, I don't think this author J.M.Snyder is for me - I'm not into gay erotic books. I'm not into erotic books.
3.5 I liked the storyline - 2 best friends who grew up together, one falls in love with the other, then they go their separate ways in high school: one becomes a popular football player & the other becomes a loner with no friends.
This was an unexpected little gem. It just goes to show that the better books are little self-published diamonds like these. It baffles me how shit like the House of Night series can get massive publishing contracts, yet fantastic and emotional books like these are rare and unique finds.
Makes me truly appreciate the internet and this website for else I would have never found it.
Go buy it, just do it. It's hard to be disappointed.
I honestly like how the book was split into two parts, and yet both parts were so different but the same. It was such a journey, so well told.
A teenage romance, with a gritty, grungy edge to it, Snyder takes us deep within the mindset of the pre-adult. The entire story is told from Vinces' pov, starting from a time when the boys were besties, to the now reality of the hatred Vince lives with like it's a living, festering beast within. Written well, although I'm not a fan of this particular pov writing style, and would have like to have heard some of the story from Eric's pov, even though the story is called Vince :). Nx
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
I thought this was a very interesting story.. I relly liked Vince, and all his thoughts.. Even the brutal ones.. I could feel how hurt he was, and how much he really wanted to hate Eric.. His best friend who hurt him so much when they were younger..
I really liked it, and I think the author wrote a perfect "leave them wanting more" ending to this book..
An angry coming of age, a belivable voice speaking of teen years and love, without, amazingly, focus perforce on its phisical aspect. A star less for some repetition, which in part transmit the obsessive thoughts of the protagonist and his struggle, but, ultimately, feels redundant. Higly recommended !
This was a hard story to read. I don't mean that in a bad way at all. Vince's anger and his pain are so real, and that's what made it difficult for me. I would love to see how this relationship grows.
Started really well, but by the middle of the book I ended up disliking the main hero, and by the end of it, I was hating him with a vengeance. He held on to his grudge without any serious justification, and all his thoughts of violence towards Eric, were a major turn-off for me.
I loved this one from J.M. Snyder, but Vince's nigh constant bloody & violent revenge fantasies grew tiring. He's hurt and angry. I get it already. Otherwise, a stellar story.
Pretty good young adult m/m story about two guys who've been best friends since they were little... until, when they're 14, one confesses he's in love with the other and gets laughter in return.