The Perfectionist's Handbook: Take Risks, Invite Criticism, and Make the Most of Your Mistakes

by Jeff Szymanski

A guide for getting your perfectionism to work for you Is perfectionism a good thing or does it get in our way? In The Perfectionist's Handbook, clinical psychologist Jeff Szymanski helps readers navigate their way out of the "perfectionism paradox": if your intentions are good (wanting to excel) and the outcomes you want are reasonable (to feel competent and satisfied), why would perfectionism backfire and result in unhappiness and stress? Learn when perfectionism will pay off, and when and why it sabotages you. Specific strategies are outlined throughout the book to help readers transform their perfectionism from a liability to an asset.

There is no reason to eliminate perfectionism altogether—instead, build on what's working and change what's not. The Perfectionist's Handbook helps readers

Distinguish between intention and strategy as a way of improving outcomes Identify diminishing returns and how to redistribute time and resources Make the most of mistakes rather than being preoccupied with trying to avoid them Learn to focus on your "Top 10" list as a way of getting the most out of your life Access others more effectively as a way of improving performance Obtain more balance in their lives

Genres: Psychology, Self Help, Nonfiction, Personal Development, Mental Health, Education

230 pages, Kindle Edition

Published August 15, 2011

Reviews

[Lisa P. · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was given this book to borrow by one of my professors, apparently, he thought I needed it ;). We are all somewhere on the Perfectionist scale, some perfectionism is healthy. This book helps you to understand yourself and where you fall on the scale. It offers some good tips on time management, and remembering how to relax. There are charts and short exercises in the book to further clarify, including a decision making chart. From learning that constructive criticism is a good thing to how negative perfectionism can bog you down... wabi sabi can be cutting edge and using the 80/20 rule to maximize your efforts.... there are lots of good pointers in this book. A quick and easy read, I read it in 3 hours. Summary pages at the ends of each chapter pull it together in a concise way. I recommend it and I think most people can find a kernel of wisdom here.

[Julian · Rating 3 out of 5]

When reading a book on perfectionism, I like to determine on what page wabi-sabi first appears. In this book, it's about half-way through, which is pretty good.

[Angela · Rating 5 out of 5]

This should really be required reading for grad students.

Love it. Would have liked more research but this is really for a lay audience. I will recommend to patients.

[Melanie · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my thing. Perhaps biased by the ironically perfect delivery of the audio book format, perhaps I've bought in to the sense that perfection is all bad.. I'm cynical that teaching perfectionists how to do perfectionism more perfectly is helpful. Healthy perfectionism I can call ambition or achievement-minded, so justifying that some of perfection is ok feels like a level of denial or something I'm skeptical of.

A lot of this referenced the PDF, which...as a library read, I haven't yet seen. Maybe they are useful. Some of the exercises sound like things I've done with clients.. Values oriented is always a good thing, not specific to perfection.

Overall I think any helpfulness was obscured by the proposal of healthy perfectionism and it ended up feeling too fuzzy on how to *really* address the narratives that play into perfectionism. I'd love to have heard more about getting out of decision paralysis. He touched on this at the end regarding fun, and I definitely want to seek out those pdfs, as I see it a lot... Perhaps could have been discussed more.

[Joanne Annabannabobanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Author is executive director of The International OCD Foundation. Book contains a description of an insightful approach to dealing with this remarkably common disorder (1% of the pop.) that Szymanski calls Exposure and Response Prevention Therapy. OCD is often misdiagnosed as a psychotic illness such as schizophrenia. Symptoms include unwanted, time-consuming behaviours that significantly impair day-to-day function. Apparently there's a neurobiological component.

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'd give it four stars for articulating some illuminating things about perfectionism.

[Nadia · Rating 3 out of 5]

It is a nice book about perfectionism, but i found a toolbox too hard too apply

[Lauren · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.8/5

[Cassie Blue · Rating 5 out of 5]

maybe this just found me at the right time but holy bajeesus. easy to read, incredibly insightful, and great takeaways

[Selton Sela · Rating 3 out of 5]

Hmmm

[SplkdancerReviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this an incredibly useful book. While it is not for everyone, in fact most people will have no interest in it let alone find it useful, for those who are perfectionists - this book will be worth every penny.

Filled with honest, truthful points and helpful suggestions, this book was designed for a very specific reader. Written from personal experience and with an understanding of the mental gymnastics that perfectionism causes, Jeff Szymanski does a good job offering constructive and useful steps for overcoming the negatives of perfectionism. Unlike most other perfectionism books, his focus is more on modifying the unproductive while continuing to value the effective - instead of "overcoming the disease."
Again, while most non-perfectionists will find this book confusing and useless, for those Perfectionists looking to change, this book will be a game-changer.

[Youssef El Baba · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good read overall, though has many typos (on purpose maybe 😛?) and it might not tackle all the problems related to the issue, though it does present many (albeit already known) strategies do deal with the unhealthy aspects of perfectionism

With hindsight though, this book has tremendously helped me overcome the negative effects of my own over-perfectionism, and I am thankful for it for that.

[Jen Lacroix · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great self help book for us overachievers.

[Ibrahim · Rating 2 out of 5]

1.5 of 5 Stars