What do you think?
Rate this book
When Life Goes Dark: Finding Hope in the Midst of Depression by Winter, Richard [IVP Books, 2012] (Paperback) [Paperback]
When Life Goes Finding Hope in the Midst of Depression by Winter, Richa...
Paperback
First published April 20, 2012
24 people are currently reading
273 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews
November 12, 2024
So glad this man made the Covenant Counseling program what it is today. Grateful for his wisdom and insight.
November 18, 2025
Accessible and wonderfully integrates scientific research and spiritual faith
July 7, 2022
Review:
Richard Winter’s book on depression When Life Goes Dark is an excellent resource. Through his own clinical walk as a psychotherapist, he provides a comprehensive picture of the issues surrounding depression, stories of how those issues played out in real life, and insights in leading people to find light out of their dark places. The book provides hope and wholeness for a problem that affects an ever-increasing number of people around the world.
Excerpts:
“Psychological vulnerability to depression arises from the interaction from our innate temperament and our relationship with our parents and childhood peers. We are made to find security and significance in relationships, creativity and work. Anything that undermines this will leave us vulnerable. So parental expectations and criticism may set up patterns of negativity and perfectionism, which will open doors to depression,” (p. 73).
“Children are dependent on parental approval for their sense of achievement and self-worth. If love and approval are consistently given, there will be a growing inner sense of self-worth and significance that is less and less dependent on external events or relationships. If, however, the child grows up in an atmosphere where he is constantly undermined and criticized and accepted only when he performs well, he will probably become self-critical, frustrated, and easily prone to depression,” (p. 74).
“Secure attachments in childhood give children resilience, greater awareness of their own and others’ emotions, plus a great ability to cope with life’s challenges without being overwhelmed by anxiety or depression. Early relationships shape our brains and our subsequent relationships in profound ways. But when damage has been done, all is not lost. Even if parents have not loved well, there may be someone else in a child’s life – a sibling, a grandparent, an aunt or uncle who can give some security and love. And later in life a consistent friend, a spouse, a teacher, a counselor or a pastor can provide a relationship in which many of the emotional and relational challenges can lead a person to growth and resilience,” (pp.176-77).
“When [people] lack a deep sense of value and significance, they feel they always have to be earning other peoples’ approval. Early childhood experiences color our reactions to people we meet as we grow up. The child in us lives on and the memories and pain are hard to face . . .Some of the primary and assumptions and cognitive distortions that predispose people to depression [are] 1. To be happy I must be accepted by all people at all times. 2. If I make a mistake, that means I am inept. 3. If someone disagrees with me, that means he doesn’t like me. 4. My value as a person depends on what others think of me,” (pp. 79-80).
“Unhealthy perfectionists tend to be all-or-nothing thinkers.. . They tend to jump to the dogmatic conclusion that a negative event will be repeated endlessly. . .They tend to be ruled by an overly critical conscience with the tyranny of should and oughts inevitably leading to enormous guilt and shame. The unhealthy perfectionist’s whole sense of self-worth depends on achieving a perfect performance.. . .Because they see themselves as inefficient and are likely to fall short of their unreachable aims, they are plagued by a sense of helplessness to achieve desired goals and are thus more vulnerable to depression,” (pp. 80-81).
“Obsessions are repetitive thoughts, ideas, impulses and images. Compulsions and rigid activities that the person feels impelled to do. Approximately 1 in 50 people suffer with OCD and accompanying the disorder is often a problem with perfectionism when personal security depends on looking just right or doing things in just the right [perfect] way,” (pp.139-140).
“Forgiveness of deep and long-standing hurts is not easy. Often we feel that we are still in pain and cannot forgive. When that is the case, we can start by asking God to make us willing to begin the hard process that may have many layers and stages. Someone has said, ‘Refusal to forgive is a poison you take, hoping it will kill your enemy!’ And that poison often results in depression,” (p. 174).
Richard Winter’s book on depression When Life Goes Dark is an excellent resource. Through his own clinical walk as a psychotherapist, he provides a comprehensive picture of the issues surrounding depression, stories of how those issues played out in real life, and insights in leading people to find light out of their dark places. The book provides hope and wholeness for a problem that affects an ever-increasing number of people around the world.
Excerpts:
“Psychological vulnerability to depression arises from the interaction from our innate temperament and our relationship with our parents and childhood peers. We are made to find security and significance in relationships, creativity and work. Anything that undermines this will leave us vulnerable. So parental expectations and criticism may set up patterns of negativity and perfectionism, which will open doors to depression,” (p. 73).
“Children are dependent on parental approval for their sense of achievement and self-worth. If love and approval are consistently given, there will be a growing inner sense of self-worth and significance that is less and less dependent on external events or relationships. If, however, the child grows up in an atmosphere where he is constantly undermined and criticized and accepted only when he performs well, he will probably become self-critical, frustrated, and easily prone to depression,” (p. 74).
“Secure attachments in childhood give children resilience, greater awareness of their own and others’ emotions, plus a great ability to cope with life’s challenges without being overwhelmed by anxiety or depression. Early relationships shape our brains and our subsequent relationships in profound ways. But when damage has been done, all is not lost. Even if parents have not loved well, there may be someone else in a child’s life – a sibling, a grandparent, an aunt or uncle who can give some security and love. And later in life a consistent friend, a spouse, a teacher, a counselor or a pastor can provide a relationship in which many of the emotional and relational challenges can lead a person to growth and resilience,” (pp.176-77).
“When [people] lack a deep sense of value and significance, they feel they always have to be earning other peoples’ approval. Early childhood experiences color our reactions to people we meet as we grow up. The child in us lives on and the memories and pain are hard to face . . .Some of the primary and assumptions and cognitive distortions that predispose people to depression [are] 1. To be happy I must be accepted by all people at all times. 2. If I make a mistake, that means I am inept. 3. If someone disagrees with me, that means he doesn’t like me. 4. My value as a person depends on what others think of me,” (pp. 79-80).
“Unhealthy perfectionists tend to be all-or-nothing thinkers.. . They tend to jump to the dogmatic conclusion that a negative event will be repeated endlessly. . .They tend to be ruled by an overly critical conscience with the tyranny of should and oughts inevitably leading to enormous guilt and shame. The unhealthy perfectionist’s whole sense of self-worth depends on achieving a perfect performance.. . .Because they see themselves as inefficient and are likely to fall short of their unreachable aims, they are plagued by a sense of helplessness to achieve desired goals and are thus more vulnerable to depression,” (pp. 80-81).
“Obsessions are repetitive thoughts, ideas, impulses and images. Compulsions and rigid activities that the person feels impelled to do. Approximately 1 in 50 people suffer with OCD and accompanying the disorder is often a problem with perfectionism when personal security depends on looking just right or doing things in just the right [perfect] way,” (pp.139-140).
“Forgiveness of deep and long-standing hurts is not easy. Often we feel that we are still in pain and cannot forgive. When that is the case, we can start by asking God to make us willing to begin the hard process that may have many layers and stages. Someone has said, ‘Refusal to forgive is a poison you take, hoping it will kill your enemy!’ And that poison often results in depression,” (p. 174).
December 6, 2020
I needed this. I found it validating. There is so much shame surrounding mental illness, especially within Christianity. Dr. Winters did not deny science or tell Christians struggling with mental illness to simply pray more. He explained what leads to depression and presented practical advice on how to deal with it. I appreciated that Winters touched on the importance of medication and how it may be a necessary tool (not a cure) for those who have a chemical imbalance in their brain. Winters also addresses the many issues that go along with depression including suicide, anxiety, anger, forgiveness, guilt, shame, and sin. I found the questions at the end of each chapter especially helpful in allowing me to reflect on my own journey with depression. I think the most important message I took away from this book was that in the midst of depression I may feel hopeless but I am not helpless. There are steps I can and will take to get better.
December 7, 2024
I think the book was great as a whole! …I just wish we had read it in class from cover to cover, rather than hopping around (so that the topics lined up with our lectures). When reading sections from the second half FIRST, I initially thought Winters’ was glazing over the biological side of things and pressing into more Christian Counseling—but when we read the first half I was reassured and came to see the quality of the book.
January 23, 2018
Dr. Winters helps readers to understand the delicate and complicated topic of depression from a systemic perspective in a balanced way.
February 10, 2018
Excellent
Thoughtful book that touch on different areas that lead us to a depression. Do you know some one that need help? Read this book and help them!!
Thoughtful book that touch on different areas that lead us to a depression. Do you know some one that need help? Read this book and help them!!
August 18, 2018
Great overview and help on this topic.
July 6, 2020
Wonderful life preserver of advice and comfort when the world feels so dark and lonely. Relatable and well written, not condescending or clinical.
December 21, 2020
Helpful, biblical perspective on the causes of depression and mental health struggles
January 4, 2021
It was informative, and I appreciated the Christian perspective, but it didn't go as deep as I was hoping.
June 28, 2013
If we have not experienced depression, we may not understand depression unless we have walked alongside someone going through this. And if we are depressed, we may not always name it as depression, perhaps struggling with a sense that we are not like others. Richard Winter's book is an important contribution for those struggling with depression and for those who care for them.
The first part of the book explores the nature of depression--the experience of depression, bi-polar illness, physical and chemical causes of depression, the wounds of childhood and griefs in the present. The second part deals with depression and while recognizing the value of medications goes beyond these in addressing various issues around depression including suicide, anxiety and fear, forgiveness and anger, guilt and shame, and what the healing process looks like. I especially appreciated the chapter on forgiveness and anger, particularly Winter's insights of how closely these are intertwined.
Winter concludes with an appendix on spiritual warfare, the demonic, and depression. He is balanced, neither dismissing the possibilities of demonic influence, particularly in those who have occult connections, nor finding in all mental struggles a lurking demon.
The first part of the book explores the nature of depression--the experience of depression, bi-polar illness, physical and chemical causes of depression, the wounds of childhood and griefs in the present. The second part deals with depression and while recognizing the value of medications goes beyond these in addressing various issues around depression including suicide, anxiety and fear, forgiveness and anger, guilt and shame, and what the healing process looks like. I especially appreciated the chapter on forgiveness and anger, particularly Winter's insights of how closely these are intertwined.
Winter concludes with an appendix on spiritual warfare, the demonic, and depression. He is balanced, neither dismissing the possibilities of demonic influence, particularly in those who have occult connections, nor finding in all mental struggles a lurking demon.
September 3, 2022
overall thought this book had some definite bookmarkable pages and great insights. some parts toward the end felt a little preachy and spiritually naive, but may just be my disdain for barrages of scripture quoting. Book adresses really hard issues so not a light or enjoyable read and at times had to put down and watch a cartoon to lighten up. Walking away from it with more understanding and a little more hope.
November 27, 2012
I really enjoyed this book. Even though it is a book about depression I found it very inspirational. The cover states it is about "finding hope in the midst of depression" and I found that to be absolutely true and what the book was ultimately about.
December 4, 2012
In a winsome, helpful way, Dr. Winter addresses the subject of depression, giving hope to those who feel hopeless. His use of Scripture is fair and right...and must-read for pastors and all Christians.
March 10, 2013
Was nice to get a mix of scientific perspective mixed with Christian faith on this difficult subject. The author is very genuine and knowledgable on both counts. First part was slightly more engaging but a good read on the whole.
February 15, 2017
It was nice to read this topic from a Christian perspective.
March 25, 2015
Excellent work. Readable, concise, powerful. Offers a helpful and balanced approach for Christians who struggle with different schools of thought on counseling.
Displaying 1 - 18 of 18 reviews