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Do I Know You?: A Faceblind Reporter's Journey into the Science of Sight, Memory, and Imagination
An award-winning science writer discovers she’s faceblind, and investigates the neuroscience of sight, memory, and imagination — while solving some long-running mysteries about her own life. Science writer Sadie Dingfelder has always known that she’s a little quirky. But while she’s made some strange mistakes over the years, it’s not until she accosts a stranger in a grocery store (who she thinks is her husband) that she realizes something is amiss. With a mixture of curiosity and dread, Dingfelder starts contacting neuroscientists and lands herself in scores of studies. In the course of her nerdy midlife crisis, she discovers that she is emphatically not neurotypical. She has prosopagnosia (faceblindness), stereoblindness, aphantasia (an inability to create mental imagery), and a condition called Severely Deficient Autobiographical Memory. What Dingfelder learns about the brain captivates her. What she learns about the places where her brain falls short forces her to reinterpret major events from her past and grieve for losses she didn’t even know she’d had. As Dingfelder learns to see herself more clearly, she also discovers a vast well of hidden neurodiversity in the world at large. There are so many different flavors of human consciousness, and most of us just assume that ours is the norm. Can you visualize? Do you have an inner monologue? Are you always 100% sure whether you know someone or not? Do you know your left from your right? If you can perform any of these mental feats, you may be surprised to learn that many people — including Dingfelder — can’t. A lively blend of personal narrative and popular science, Do I Know You? is the story of one unusual mind’s attempt to understand itself — and a fascinating exploration of the remarkable breadth of human experience.
278 pages, Kindle Edition
First published June 25, 2024
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June 18, 2024
Dingfelder knew she wasn't great at remembering faces—but mistaking another man for her husband at the grocery store (there's a whole thing about peanut butter) was one of the clearer clues that she just might have something more going on than a bit of spaciness. And so began a quest to figure it out: a seasoned reporter, Dingfelder reached out to scientist after scientist running studies on the brain to learn more about face blindness and other associated conditions...and to get herself into those studies to see where those conditions fit into her own experience.
I spent a fair amount of time, while reading, trying to come up with a fitting word for the book's tone, and for now at least I've landed on punchy. Dingfelder brings a lot of energy to the project, and although the book is full of research, it's never dry. The tone wasn't 100% for me—personal preference—but the science is fascinating and more than makes up for it. If you haven't heard of face blindness (prosopagnosia), have a look at some photos of people you recognize...and then flip those photos upside-down and see if how much more difficult it is to recognize them. There's science behind why some people can recognize other people instantly, even if it's been years, and others struggle to place the face of their own family member (guess which camp Dingfelder falls into)—and a lot of that science is worked into the book—but at its core, what you need to know is that it's not as simple as having a bad memory for names.
Face blindness sounds lonely to me. I've only met one person who identified as having it (though probably I've known other people with some degree of face blindness, whether or not they were aware of it), and I don't know what her experience was like (though I will be recommending this book to her!), but it sounds like something that can be really isolating without the sorts of tricks that Dingfelder learned along the way. But it's not all loneliness (and for all that I said that the tone wasn't always my personal preference, this bit made me giggle):
"I hardly remember anyone from school anymore," I say. "Honestly, I don't even remember your kids' names, or how old they are, or what you do for work, or where exactly you live."
"You've always been like that," Brown Anne says.
"No one expects you to remember things," Red Ann says. "We expect you to tell good stories."
My heart floods with joy and gratitude. These guys really know me! And while the facts of their lives slip through my fingers, I know them too—amorphous things, like the cadence of their speech, the kinds of drinks they will order, and how they will respond to my stories about learning to drive. (Red Ann: concern for my safety; Brown Anne: concern for other people's safety.) (loc. 1989*)
A very quick read for those who are insatiably curious about medical curiosities...or just insatiably curious in general.
Thanks to the author and publisher for providing a review copy through NetGalley.
*Quotes are from an ARC and may not be final.
I spent a fair amount of time, while reading, trying to come up with a fitting word for the book's tone, and for now at least I've landed on punchy. Dingfelder brings a lot of energy to the project, and although the book is full of research, it's never dry. The tone wasn't 100% for me—personal preference—but the science is fascinating and more than makes up for it. If you haven't heard of face blindness (prosopagnosia), have a look at some photos of people you recognize...and then flip those photos upside-down and see if how much more difficult it is to recognize them. There's science behind why some people can recognize other people instantly, even if it's been years, and others struggle to place the face of their own family member (guess which camp Dingfelder falls into)—and a lot of that science is worked into the book—but at its core, what you need to know is that it's not as simple as having a bad memory for names.
Face blindness sounds lonely to me. I've only met one person who identified as having it (though probably I've known other people with some degree of face blindness, whether or not they were aware of it), and I don't know what her experience was like (though I will be recommending this book to her!), but it sounds like something that can be really isolating without the sorts of tricks that Dingfelder learned along the way. But it's not all loneliness (and for all that I said that the tone wasn't always my personal preference, this bit made me giggle):
"I hardly remember anyone from school anymore," I say. "Honestly, I don't even remember your kids' names, or how old they are, or what you do for work, or where exactly you live."
"You've always been like that," Brown Anne says.
"No one expects you to remember things," Red Ann says. "We expect you to tell good stories."
My heart floods with joy and gratitude. These guys really know me! And while the facts of their lives slip through my fingers, I know them too—amorphous things, like the cadence of their speech, the kinds of drinks they will order, and how they will respond to my stories about learning to drive. (Red Ann: concern for my safety; Brown Anne: concern for other people's safety.) (loc. 1989*)
A very quick read for those who are insatiably curious about medical curiosities...or just insatiably curious in general.
Thanks to the author and publisher for providing a review copy through NetGalley.
*Quotes are from an ARC and may not be final.
March 24, 2025
3.5 stars
A breezy and occasionally funny exploration of the author’s various forms of neurodivergence. And wow, she has a lot going on, although somehow she managed to remain in denial until around age 40. The topics in the order that Dingfelder explores them:
Prosopagnosia (faceblindness): You can see why this one was chosen for the title, because it’s pretty wild. In general, the human brain is great at recognizing faces and processes them holistically (I’m guessing this why we tend to be bad at describing a person’s actual features, although we can recognize them instantly). For Dingfelder, however, this doesn’t work at all—she has such severe faceblindness that she mistakes a stranger for her husband and her aunt for her mother. What’s most wild to me is how she managed to stay in denial about this for decades, despite losing friends when they changed hairstyles (as an adolescent she was lonely, while kids she’d hung out with were hurt whenever she next saw them and treated them like strangers), and being unable to follow plots of movies because she couldn’t recognize the characters. If someone put on a hat, forget about it. Happily, she did eventually hit on a workaround that improved her life: treating everybody like a friend.
(If you want to know how your face memory stacks up, try the Cambridge Face Memory Test online. I tried it and scored, as I expected, exactly average. It gets quite challenging, to pick out the super-recognizers: people who truly never forget a face.)
Stereoblindness (seeing only in 2D): Interestingly, this often accompanies faceblindness, and Dingfelder has it too. It is a very different way of seeing the world, and no, you can’t experience it just by closing one eye, because your brain fills in what it knows is there (when people lose an eye, apparently it takes months to lose their 3D vision). For this reason Dingfelder never learned to drive until researching this book, and I hope she is exaggerating for effect because the idea of her on the road sounds dangerous for everyone!
Aphantasia (lack of a mind’s eye): Dingfelder can’t picture things, and also (not necessarily related) has no internal monologue. She mostly uses this section to reflect on how different people’s inner lives are, in ways we generally don’t realize. When others talked about things she didn’t experience, she generally assumed they were exaggerating or speaking metaphorically—and sometimes they are speaking metaphorically. For instance, some people who describe “seeing red” when angry literally see it, while others simply use it as an idiom. Dingfelder’s aphantasia may have some benefits, though: along with her other neurological quirks, she credits it with her lack of body issues despite being chunky and consuming lots of body-image-focused media (she doesn’t remember what she looks like and defaults to assuming she looks great) and with her easily getting over even the nastiest breakups (out of sight is truly out of mind for her).
Severely deficient autobiographical memory (SDAM): By this point you may be feeling something about Dingfelder’s story doesn’t quite add up despite everything described above. Reading the book, I definitely did: she forgets people in a way lack of recognition alone doesn’t account for. (If your middle school best friend had suddenly disappeared, surely you’d have tried to find them? And, well, the breakup thing.) The answer is that she also has a sort of amnesia, where she quickly forgets her own experiences, particularly the details. She surmises that this is part of what trained her to be a journalist—she keeps a record by putting things into words. I wanted more from this section, as SDAM seems just as life-altering and headline-worthy as faceblindness.
So overall, a lot of interesting material here, and food for thought on how much any of us can know what it’s like to be another person. I appreciate the author’s vulnerability in letting us into her zany brain, and her style is breezy, humorous and easy to read. It is a bit fluffy though—there are a lot of full scenes, mostly conversations with her family and friends, which did not need to be. And I was annoyed by inappropriate use of an “imagine yourself…” gimmick: here I was imagining how terrifying it would be to have brain surgery, and really she just wanted to tell us about some new facts learned about the brain via a study whose participants had brain surgery. (Uncharitably, I wondered if a person without aphantasia would have written this bit, but perhaps the better target is her editor.) It could all have been tightened up a bit, but as the text is only 265 pages long I suppose it might’ve been padded out on purpose.
In the end, worth reading though not a stand-out for me, and an accessible introduction to some lesser-known forms of neurodivergence.
A breezy and occasionally funny exploration of the author’s various forms of neurodivergence. And wow, she has a lot going on, although somehow she managed to remain in denial until around age 40. The topics in the order that Dingfelder explores them:
Prosopagnosia (faceblindness): You can see why this one was chosen for the title, because it’s pretty wild. In general, the human brain is great at recognizing faces and processes them holistically (I’m guessing this why we tend to be bad at describing a person’s actual features, although we can recognize them instantly). For Dingfelder, however, this doesn’t work at all—she has such severe faceblindness that she mistakes a stranger for her husband and her aunt for her mother. What’s most wild to me is how she managed to stay in denial about this for decades, despite losing friends when they changed hairstyles (as an adolescent she was lonely, while kids she’d hung out with were hurt whenever she next saw them and treated them like strangers), and being unable to follow plots of movies because she couldn’t recognize the characters. If someone put on a hat, forget about it. Happily, she did eventually hit on a workaround that improved her life: treating everybody like a friend.
(If you want to know how your face memory stacks up, try the Cambridge Face Memory Test online. I tried it and scored, as I expected, exactly average. It gets quite challenging, to pick out the super-recognizers: people who truly never forget a face.)
Stereoblindness (seeing only in 2D): Interestingly, this often accompanies faceblindness, and Dingfelder has it too. It is a very different way of seeing the world, and no, you can’t experience it just by closing one eye, because your brain fills in what it knows is there (when people lose an eye, apparently it takes months to lose their 3D vision). For this reason Dingfelder never learned to drive until researching this book, and I hope she is exaggerating for effect because the idea of her on the road sounds dangerous for everyone!
Aphantasia (lack of a mind’s eye): Dingfelder can’t picture things, and also (not necessarily related) has no internal monologue. She mostly uses this section to reflect on how different people’s inner lives are, in ways we generally don’t realize. When others talked about things she didn’t experience, she generally assumed they were exaggerating or speaking metaphorically—and sometimes they are speaking metaphorically. For instance, some people who describe “seeing red” when angry literally see it, while others simply use it as an idiom. Dingfelder’s aphantasia may have some benefits, though: along with her other neurological quirks, she credits it with her lack of body issues despite being chunky and consuming lots of body-image-focused media (she doesn’t remember what she looks like and defaults to assuming she looks great) and with her easily getting over even the nastiest breakups (out of sight is truly out of mind for her).
Severely deficient autobiographical memory (SDAM): By this point you may be feeling something about Dingfelder’s story doesn’t quite add up despite everything described above. Reading the book, I definitely did: she forgets people in a way lack of recognition alone doesn’t account for. (If your middle school best friend had suddenly disappeared, surely you’d have tried to find them? And, well, the breakup thing.) The answer is that she also has a sort of amnesia, where she quickly forgets her own experiences, particularly the details. She surmises that this is part of what trained her to be a journalist—she keeps a record by putting things into words. I wanted more from this section, as SDAM seems just as life-altering and headline-worthy as faceblindness.
So overall, a lot of interesting material here, and food for thought on how much any of us can know what it’s like to be another person. I appreciate the author’s vulnerability in letting us into her zany brain, and her style is breezy, humorous and easy to read. It is a bit fluffy though—there are a lot of full scenes, mostly conversations with her family and friends, which did not need to be. And I was annoyed by inappropriate use of an “imagine yourself…” gimmick: here I was imagining how terrifying it would be to have brain surgery, and really she just wanted to tell us about some new facts learned about the brain via a study whose participants had brain surgery. (Uncharitably, I wondered if a person without aphantasia would have written this bit, but perhaps the better target is her editor.) It could all have been tightened up a bit, but as the text is only 265 pages long I suppose it might’ve been padded out on purpose.
In the end, worth reading though not a stand-out for me, and an accessible introduction to some lesser-known forms of neurodivergence.
July 21, 2024
Fascinating!
A science based book about facial blindness wouldn’t usually be on my radar. But I saw an interview with this author and Katherine Center, who is a romcom author. Sadie had helped Katherine write her main character in Hello, Stranger, who developed prosopagnosia (or facial blindness.) Sadie seemed to be engaging and interesting, so I thought I’d give her book a try.
Within this book Sadie is also so engaging and interesting. She tells of her personal journey, including many humorous incidents, as well as more of the scientific side of her conditions. Turns out, she not only has prosopagnosia (facial blindness), but also at least some aspects of stereoblindness, aphantasia, SD-AM, topographical agnosia, left-right confusion, and auditory processing dysfunction. (I might be wrong. These are big words and new concepts for me. But I was trying to take notes and understand more about these brain differences.) Sadie made it all sound relatable and interesting. My family wasn’t very interested in discussing all of my newfound knowledge with me, and they weren’t quite sure that I always hit curbs when I drive due to some stereoblindness that may be the result of poor eyesight in my left eye as a child 🤣 but the book gave me a lot to think about. The brain is fascinating!
I listened to a lot of this on audiobook, and Sadie does an excellent job with the narration. Who knew listening to a science based book could be so fun? If you’re interested in the topic but afraid of reading a brain science book, give the audio a try. But I did read a good bit with my eyes as well to help me see the big words and get a better grasp of some of the topics.
This might be a 5⭐️ book because I think the author definitely meets her goals of writing a scientific book that is also interesting, engaging and even entertaining. But for me it’s still a non-fiction science book that had me zoning out at some points. Even though I found it to be so interesting, it’s maybe 4⭐️ for me. It was very enlightening and really had me thinking and wanting to discuss the differences Sadie presents. I’d definitely recommend this book to others, so I’m bumping it up to 5⭐️.
A great quote from the book:
‘When you feel like an alien trying to fit in among humans, finding other aliens with similar difficulties makes you feel so much less alone.’
It’s really a great perspective on neurodivergence and how understanding more about brain differences can help us understand each other so much better.
A science based book about facial blindness wouldn’t usually be on my radar. But I saw an interview with this author and Katherine Center, who is a romcom author. Sadie had helped Katherine write her main character in Hello, Stranger, who developed prosopagnosia (or facial blindness.) Sadie seemed to be engaging and interesting, so I thought I’d give her book a try.
Within this book Sadie is also so engaging and interesting. She tells of her personal journey, including many humorous incidents, as well as more of the scientific side of her conditions. Turns out, she not only has prosopagnosia (facial blindness), but also at least some aspects of stereoblindness, aphantasia, SD-AM, topographical agnosia, left-right confusion, and auditory processing dysfunction. (I might be wrong. These are big words and new concepts for me. But I was trying to take notes and understand more about these brain differences.) Sadie made it all sound relatable and interesting. My family wasn’t very interested in discussing all of my newfound knowledge with me, and they weren’t quite sure that I always hit curbs when I drive due to some stereoblindness that may be the result of poor eyesight in my left eye as a child 🤣 but the book gave me a lot to think about. The brain is fascinating!
I listened to a lot of this on audiobook, and Sadie does an excellent job with the narration. Who knew listening to a science based book could be so fun? If you’re interested in the topic but afraid of reading a brain science book, give the audio a try. But I did read a good bit with my eyes as well to help me see the big words and get a better grasp of some of the topics.
This might be a 5⭐️ book because I think the author definitely meets her goals of writing a scientific book that is also interesting, engaging and even entertaining. But for me it’s still a non-fiction science book that had me zoning out at some points. Even though I found it to be so interesting, it’s maybe 4⭐️ for me. It was very enlightening and really had me thinking and wanting to discuss the differences Sadie presents. I’d definitely recommend this book to others, so I’m bumping it up to 5⭐️.
A great quote from the book:
‘When you feel like an alien trying to fit in among humans, finding other aliens with similar difficulties makes you feel so much less alone.’
It’s really a great perspective on neurodivergence and how understanding more about brain differences can help us understand each other so much better.
March 19, 2024
Funny and surprising tour of the intricacies of the human brain. It piqued my interest as I suffer from a mild case of prosopagnosia - and after reading it I feel much better about myself. The author shows what neurodiversity really means and how it makes us all different. And, as the author writes, “at the moment when humanity is facing existential-level challenges, we need all brains on deck”.
Sadie Dingfelder has a real knack for making very complicated issues accessible. The first-person narrative works well here, as we join her on an expedition to diagnose herself and discover the roots of her uniqueness. I soon found myself rooting for her, even though I sometimes wondered if she wasn't writing this book to get free access to very expensive medical procedures - she jokes about it a lot, but then again, with American health care costs, who could blame her?..
Thanks to the publisher, Little, Brown and Company,, and NetGalley for an advanced copy of this book.
Sadie Dingfelder has a real knack for making very complicated issues accessible. The first-person narrative works well here, as we join her on an expedition to diagnose herself and discover the roots of her uniqueness. I soon found myself rooting for her, even though I sometimes wondered if she wasn't writing this book to get free access to very expensive medical procedures - she jokes about it a lot, but then again, with American health care costs, who could blame her?..
Thanks to the publisher, Little, Brown and Company,, and NetGalley for an advanced copy of this book.
April 2, 2024
Sadie Dingfelder mistook another man for her husband in the grocery store. Not recognizing people wasn't a new thing, but something clicked after this incident which had Sadie asking if she was legitimately, scientifically, diagnosably faceblind. Did she not just have a bad memory, but prosopagnosia, the inability to remember faces? Using her reporter skills, she started reaching out to researchers and people in the medical field to find out how to get tested. What she learned led her to discover not only why she couldn't remember faces, but why other things that seemed easy to other people were more challenging to her, like driving, birdwatching, remembering personal details about others, visualize internally, and more. Diving into areas of neurodivergence on beyond autism and ADHD, she uncovers how she and others like her see the world, and how the neuroprocessing world is incredibly diverse and sometimes hard to articulate or diagnose.
The author reached out and asked if I would like an eARC of her book with no strings attached. It sounded like an interesting read so I said yes. And I'm very glad I did. Sadie Dingfelder's story of personal neurodivergence discovery is absolutely fascinating and engagingly written. Learning how her brain interprets the world and in a way that isn't ideally suited for the way we structure the world for most people, it is amazing how she made it into her 40s without realizing many of these things. She is incredible at adapting, finding personal work arounds, and making things work for her. (Even the tricks and workarounds she shares she used to write the book.) She's a resiliency superwoman. It was also very brave of her to share her story with the rest of the world, but I think the payoff will be great. It will be eye-opening for many neurotypical readers and hopefully make us more empathetic to those with brains that function "differently" (though there's a good argument made as to whether any of our brains operate "normally"). After reading this, I realized one of the students I work with likely has a spacial memory challenge she mentions and would explain why he can never remember where things are even in very familiar settings. It has challenged me to be more observant and see if he really can't remember of if he's just being lazy as I assumed. How many people assumed the author couldn't remember their name because she was lazy? It's a challenge to give people the benefit of the doubt rather than jump to conclusions. I believe it will also make many readers who have brains like Sadie's in some aspect to feel more seen, and possibly like they've found someone who understands them for the first time. Read it for the fascinating science and personal discovery story, but walk away with your empathy and understanding increased for those you come into contact with.
Notes on content [based on the ARC]:
Language: About 10 minor swears
Sexual content: She mentions conditioning a boyfriend with phone discussions of a sexual nature, no details.
Violence: None
Ethnic diversity: The scientists and friends of the author come from diverse backgrounds.
LGBTQ+ content: None specified
Other: The author recounts doing MRIs several times. Her learning to drive accounts may make some readers anxious. Recreations of many of the visual tests are provided in a sample so readers can test themselves. The author mentions an experience trying LSD as a teenager. Faceblindness, stereoblindness, aphantasia, and Severely Deficient Autobiographical Memory are all explored and discussed in detail.
The author reached out and asked if I would like an eARC of her book with no strings attached. It sounded like an interesting read so I said yes. And I'm very glad I did. Sadie Dingfelder's story of personal neurodivergence discovery is absolutely fascinating and engagingly written. Learning how her brain interprets the world and in a way that isn't ideally suited for the way we structure the world for most people, it is amazing how she made it into her 40s without realizing many of these things. She is incredible at adapting, finding personal work arounds, and making things work for her. (Even the tricks and workarounds she shares she used to write the book.) She's a resiliency superwoman. It was also very brave of her to share her story with the rest of the world, but I think the payoff will be great. It will be eye-opening for many neurotypical readers and hopefully make us more empathetic to those with brains that function "differently" (though there's a good argument made as to whether any of our brains operate "normally"). After reading this, I realized one of the students I work with likely has a spacial memory challenge she mentions and would explain why he can never remember where things are even in very familiar settings. It has challenged me to be more observant and see if he really can't remember of if he's just being lazy as I assumed. How many people assumed the author couldn't remember their name because she was lazy? It's a challenge to give people the benefit of the doubt rather than jump to conclusions. I believe it will also make many readers who have brains like Sadie's in some aspect to feel more seen, and possibly like they've found someone who understands them for the first time. Read it for the fascinating science and personal discovery story, but walk away with your empathy and understanding increased for those you come into contact with.
Notes on content [based on the ARC]:
Language: About 10 minor swears
Sexual content: She mentions conditioning a boyfriend with phone discussions of a sexual nature, no details.
Violence: None
Ethnic diversity: The scientists and friends of the author come from diverse backgrounds.
LGBTQ+ content: None specified
Other: The author recounts doing MRIs several times. Her learning to drive accounts may make some readers anxious. Recreations of many of the visual tests are provided in a sample so readers can test themselves. The author mentions an experience trying LSD as a teenager. Faceblindness, stereoblindness, aphantasia, and Severely Deficient Autobiographical Memory are all explored and discussed in detail.
February 9, 2024
thanks to netgalley & little brown & company for the free earc in exchange for a fair and honest review!
this is a well written book about a very niche topic. if you’re interested in prosopagnosia or stereoblindness, this is a good read. it definitely was interesting to me, as i have a strong interest in psychology and neuroscience.
hearing first-hand reports about different neurological conditions is very interesting to me, and this author’s ability to thread personal experiences and scientific research together was very good.
this is a well written book about a very niche topic. if you’re interested in prosopagnosia or stereoblindness, this is a good read. it definitely was interesting to me, as i have a strong interest in psychology and neuroscience.
hearing first-hand reports about different neurological conditions is very interesting to me, and this author’s ability to thread personal experiences and scientific research together was very good.
August 7, 2024
Sadie’s mind is fascinating. She sees in 2 dimension, she has severe prosopagnosia (face blindness), and aphantasia (the inability to visualize images in the mind) and SDAM (severely deficient autobiographical memory). Even just one of these things would make an interesting book, but reading all of it as a combination of science and the author’s own self discovery is amazing.
I’ve always believed that experiences shape personality and behavior. But this book reminds that the way each human brain works is different, and equally shapes a person. Obviously the amount of neurodiversity that exists in humans is beyond measure, but I think it’s a cool reminder to have some grace with the people around you who are all experiencing the world in very different ways.
I’ve also never thought about my own inner conscience and how much of it is images, words, or abstract thought. Thanks to Sadie’s quest to figure out how her brain works, I’ve been enjoying analyzing my own mind. When I’m driving in the car and my thoughts are going all over the place I’ve started to stop and notice what thoughts are of images or words or when my mind is going to an abstract place. It’s so interesting! Yay for cool science and learning more about brains.
I 100% recommend this book!
I’ve always believed that experiences shape personality and behavior. But this book reminds that the way each human brain works is different, and equally shapes a person. Obviously the amount of neurodiversity that exists in humans is beyond measure, but I think it’s a cool reminder to have some grace with the people around you who are all experiencing the world in very different ways.
I’ve also never thought about my own inner conscience and how much of it is images, words, or abstract thought. Thanks to Sadie’s quest to figure out how her brain works, I’ve been enjoying analyzing my own mind. When I’m driving in the car and my thoughts are going all over the place I’ve started to stop and notice what thoughts are of images or words or when my mind is going to an abstract place. It’s so interesting! Yay for cool science and learning more about brains.
I 100% recommend this book!
August 14, 2025
I fell into this memoir super easily and I most certainly could relate to many of the unique problems the author is describing in this book. But I think if you are faceblind or not reading this account should be very interesting. It would be a great way for neurotypical people understand the issues that the neurodiverse suffer with. I certainly have my own similar incidents on most of the topics covered in here - I just never had all of these detailed tests the author put herself through. In fact I would be very cautious about getting all of those MRI scans due to the radiation (yet at the same time I would be very intrigued about the results)...
So reading this was both entertaining and very informative. The stories she tells about her many blunders due to these conditions are certainly fun to read but they are eye opening too. There were many times she walked right past close friends and family members but didn't acknowledge them because she didn't recognize them. Me; I tend to recognize people by their hairstyle. If they change that then I often think it's someone else. It gets even worse if people are a different race and they wear different wigs. To me a different wig means it's a totally different person! And then I feel confused about what had happened to the other person... That is faceblindness. I think I have it with stuff like cars too.. to me a car is a red car or a black car, etc. I recognize the one person's car by the beads hanging on the mirror.
Then there is the section on topographical agnosia. Yes, I have this too! But I only have it indoors. Like in hospitals or various medical places. I get all turned around and walk in circles after my appointment because I can't find the exit. But if I am walking around outside I use landmarks and I remember routes I take. So I don't get lost then. But even though I had the same PCP for years I get lost after the appointment... The author describes her issues with that too. Until I read this I didn't know it had a name.
Oh and the faceblindness is called prosopagnosia. Don't ask me to say it. I won't attempt it because I mangle words. But there are tests she took about this and how she tried to improve it. It has something to do with facial features. And the left eye. Many people are born with it and others get it from various things like strokes...
Apparently there is a special place in the brain that focuses on faces. Or it's supposed to. It starts out thick and as you age it gets thin. But in some people it stays thick. And thick is bad. It also has to do with neural pruning. So that part of the book was fascinating with lots of new information I hadn't known before.
Then there is the stereoblind. This is something about seeing in 3D. Now I am a tad unsure if I have this or not? I am pretty sure I have depth perception but I can't do those Magic Eye puzzles so...?? I have never gone to a 3D movie so I have no idea about that. She also mentioned the Viewmaster so I do remember those as a kid.
The thing that struck me the most about her stereoblind problem was the car driving! Now that caught me totally off guard! It caused huge issues about staying in the proper lane...even her husband was terrified! I don't drive - never learned - so this is something I really never think about.
She also mentioned the ability to measure distance with the eyes. Now that is something I never understood. You know like when you see those weird signs that say "don't park within X feet of this sign". I never understood how people know how to measure X feet. I would actually need a tape measure or something. Or is it just because I prefer to be accurate? I would probably also worry that I was like 5 inches too close to the sign. But that is the autistic brain you know..things need to be precise. But is it depth perception that makes one able to measure things visually?? I have also been passengers in cars where the driver uses GPS and the GPS is talking, saying stuff like in "a half mile turn to the right". Well how do you know when you have traveled a half mile??? To me that is totally baffling!
How do neurotypical people do that?
Then the final part of the book covers aphantasia and SDAM. I actually found out about this book by putting the term "aphantasia" into the search engine for my library. And poof there it was! And so I had to go read this. Aphantasia of course is when you cannot visualize. Ask to imagine a red apple in your mind's eye and you don't see anything. That is me. It's very common in autistics too. I believe I was born with it. But my memory is in words. Which means, according to what the author writes here, that my left hippocampi is larger. Most people have a larger right hippocampi for visualization.
So this book has all the fun of personal stories plus the science info about it too. As she went to interview a bunch of experts on these topics, put herself through a bunch of tests and did a bunch of experiments. It all made for some entertaining stories.
But best of all is I could relate to her experiences and I learned some new things too. It's not often that I can relate to things in books.
If you are neurodiverse you may want to read this, to see if you have any of these conditions. It wasn't that long ago I was diagnosed with hyperacusis (but I didn't know about that condition either until I learned about it from YouTube video) so knowing what these things are called is very useful!
So reading this was both entertaining and very informative. The stories she tells about her many blunders due to these conditions are certainly fun to read but they are eye opening too. There were many times she walked right past close friends and family members but didn't acknowledge them because she didn't recognize them. Me; I tend to recognize people by their hairstyle. If they change that then I often think it's someone else. It gets even worse if people are a different race and they wear different wigs. To me a different wig means it's a totally different person! And then I feel confused about what had happened to the other person... That is faceblindness. I think I have it with stuff like cars too.. to me a car is a red car or a black car, etc. I recognize the one person's car by the beads hanging on the mirror.
Then there is the section on topographical agnosia. Yes, I have this too! But I only have it indoors. Like in hospitals or various medical places. I get all turned around and walk in circles after my appointment because I can't find the exit. But if I am walking around outside I use landmarks and I remember routes I take. So I don't get lost then. But even though I had the same PCP for years I get lost after the appointment... The author describes her issues with that too. Until I read this I didn't know it had a name.
Oh and the faceblindness is called prosopagnosia. Don't ask me to say it. I won't attempt it because I mangle words. But there are tests she took about this and how she tried to improve it. It has something to do with facial features. And the left eye. Many people are born with it and others get it from various things like strokes...
Apparently there is a special place in the brain that focuses on faces. Or it's supposed to. It starts out thick and as you age it gets thin. But in some people it stays thick. And thick is bad. It also has to do with neural pruning. So that part of the book was fascinating with lots of new information I hadn't known before.
Then there is the stereoblind. This is something about seeing in 3D. Now I am a tad unsure if I have this or not? I am pretty sure I have depth perception but I can't do those Magic Eye puzzles so...?? I have never gone to a 3D movie so I have no idea about that. She also mentioned the Viewmaster so I do remember those as a kid.
The thing that struck me the most about her stereoblind problem was the car driving! Now that caught me totally off guard! It caused huge issues about staying in the proper lane...even her husband was terrified! I don't drive - never learned - so this is something I really never think about.
She also mentioned the ability to measure distance with the eyes. Now that is something I never understood. You know like when you see those weird signs that say "don't park within X feet of this sign". I never understood how people know how to measure X feet. I would actually need a tape measure or something. Or is it just because I prefer to be accurate? I would probably also worry that I was like 5 inches too close to the sign. But that is the autistic brain you know..things need to be precise. But is it depth perception that makes one able to measure things visually?? I have also been passengers in cars where the driver uses GPS and the GPS is talking, saying stuff like in "a half mile turn to the right". Well how do you know when you have traveled a half mile??? To me that is totally baffling!
How do neurotypical people do that?
Then the final part of the book covers aphantasia and SDAM. I actually found out about this book by putting the term "aphantasia" into the search engine for my library. And poof there it was! And so I had to go read this. Aphantasia of course is when you cannot visualize. Ask to imagine a red apple in your mind's eye and you don't see anything. That is me. It's very common in autistics too. I believe I was born with it. But my memory is in words. Which means, according to what the author writes here, that my left hippocampi is larger. Most people have a larger right hippocampi for visualization.
So this book has all the fun of personal stories plus the science info about it too. As she went to interview a bunch of experts on these topics, put herself through a bunch of tests and did a bunch of experiments. It all made for some entertaining stories.
But best of all is I could relate to her experiences and I learned some new things too. It's not often that I can relate to things in books.
If you are neurodiverse you may want to read this, to see if you have any of these conditions. It wasn't that long ago I was diagnosed with hyperacusis (but I didn't know about that condition either until I learned about it from YouTube video) so knowing what these things are called is very useful!
February 28, 2025
Didn’t know what to expect because this was a book club selection that I honestly wouldn’t have picked by myself. But this was really interesting! Lots to unpack about neurodivergence and social norms. Parts were unexpectedly funny and others really moved me, especially when the author reflected on how lonely she felt as a child. This book also was a talker. We had a great discussion about it at my book club.
January 10, 2025
well written, thoughtful account of the author’s experience discovering that she is face blind. lots of interesting info and scientific studies quoted, but also easy to read and digest. learned lots, would recommend
March 20, 2025
4.5 ⭐️
A really fun and fascinating exploration of the peculiarities of the human brain. Sadie’s personal anecdotes were consistently entertaining, and her scientific exploration was super interesting. I didn’t even know stereoblindness was a thing, though it makes sense. The chapters on aphantasia in particular made me question my whole perception of reality. And I laughed a bunch; she’s a great writer.
A really fun and fascinating exploration of the peculiarities of the human brain. Sadie’s personal anecdotes were consistently entertaining, and her scientific exploration was super interesting. I didn’t even know stereoblindness was a thing, though it makes sense. The chapters on aphantasia in particular made me question my whole perception of reality. And I laughed a bunch; she’s a great writer.
July 26, 2024
Dingfelder’s quirky humor shines in this fascinating memoir exploring her unique brain, and her unique self. Highly recommend!!
February 1, 2024
I usually gravitate towards reads like these.. utterly unique and educational. The title alone already drew me in. But boy did I not expect to fly through it. Sadie was hysterical and that's what made this book so digestible and a pleasure to read. She was teaching AND making me laugh at the same time. Despite numerous medical (neurological) jargons...I mean A WHOLE LOT OF BRAIN SCIENCE you will come across, Sadie Dingfelder did an amazing job in demystifying the nature of her condition. This book taught me so much on how I see the world. It was raw, witty, vulnerable and empowering. Can't wait to read more of her work. Thank you to NetGalley, Little, Brown and Company, and Sadie Dingfelder for the chance to read this book in advance.
December 5, 2024
This was a really good book. I'm not usually a big fan of very layman-style narration, but this book very easily combines her feelings and personal experience with the actual science of the matter. This combination makes this a very easy read whereas I think if it was a purely scientific book it would be a slough to read. I also don't think you could easy have a purely scientific book on this matter because of how wildly interconnected all of these disorders are.
I originally picked this book up because I knew a was pretty faceblind (While reading I took the Cambridge test Dingfelder mentions in the beginning and only made a 53/100), but as I was reading I realized I had a pretty severe case of aphantasia as well (Which I think I knew but I just did not care enough to think to hard about). While reading her narration lead me to make several connections and theories I never would have investigated myself. (I'm colorblind [protanomaly] which through reading this book I realized that aphantasia, colorblindness, faceblindness, and my aptitude in school are probably all interconnected.)
In general I tend to really enjoy listening to/reading works by people with niche issues/disorders/disabilities that I suspect I have because I've never been too compelled to research those things myself. Hearing other people investigate themselves and make connections to their own social life or the anatomy of themselves and others allows me to easily do the same without falling into the rabbit-hole myself.
Anyway, great book. Super interesting information. I really recommend it for anyone with vision deficiencies, autism/ADHD or processing disorders.
I originally picked this book up because I knew a was pretty faceblind (While reading I took the Cambridge test Dingfelder mentions in the beginning and only made a 53/100), but as I was reading I realized I had a pretty severe case of aphantasia as well (Which I think I knew but I just did not care enough to think to hard about). While reading her narration lead me to make several connections and theories I never would have investigated myself. (I'm colorblind [protanomaly] which through reading this book I realized that aphantasia, colorblindness, faceblindness, and my aptitude in school are probably all interconnected.)
In general I tend to really enjoy listening to/reading works by people with niche issues/disorders/disabilities that I suspect I have because I've never been too compelled to research those things myself. Hearing other people investigate themselves and make connections to their own social life or the anatomy of themselves and others allows me to easily do the same without falling into the rabbit-hole myself.
Anyway, great book. Super interesting information. I really recommend it for anyone with vision deficiencies, autism/ADHD or processing disorders.
January 20, 2025
I couldn't put this down! And this one's personal to me: I, too, have a not-insignificant level of face blindness (prosopagnosia), along with at least two close family members. I related distressingly well to some of the author's funny anecdotes about not recognizing someone she's clearly supposed to know. My husband is my best coping mechanism, giving me helpful hints about people approaching us, or keeping me caught up with a movie plot containing two (or more!) white guys with short brown hair.
The author doesn't only have face blindness, but also stereo blindness and memory issues that I forget the name for. I love her tone and her attitude, and the perspective she brings to Neuro divergence.
The author doesn't only have face blindness, but also stereo blindness and memory issues that I forget the name for. I love her tone and her attitude, and the perspective she brings to Neuro divergence.
January 11, 2025
So interesting! As someone who lovesss reading fiction where the story is told from multiple perspectives and as someone who thinks a lot about what other people are thinking….this book added a whole additional layer as to why we all experience the same world differently. Additionally, as an educator this sparked so much reflection and many wonderings.
The story covers the author’s realization her own brain works very differently than others, and the subsequent journey she goes on to learn why…tons of fascinating brain science covered. Definitely recommend- a few chapters drag a bit in the middle (her learning to drive gives more detail than needed) but overall it’s a quick and engaging read that gives you a lot to chew on…apparently when I ask my husband what he’s thinking about and he says NOTHING, it may actually be the truth!
The story covers the author’s realization her own brain works very differently than others, and the subsequent journey she goes on to learn why…tons of fascinating brain science covered. Definitely recommend- a few chapters drag a bit in the middle (her learning to drive gives more detail than needed) but overall it’s a quick and engaging read that gives you a lot to chew on…apparently when I ask my husband what he’s thinking about and he says NOTHING, it may actually be the truth!
August 17, 2024
I learned so much from this book. It explains the different ways each of us subjectively experiences the world, by explaining the neurology of perception and processing. Remarkably, Dingfelder makes what could be a morass of details easily digestible. The book answered one question that's been dogging me for a long time: Why do I have so much trouble visualizing things during guided meditations? Now that I know about aphantasia (and it's opposite: hyperphantasia) I understand that our ability to visualize is on a spectrum and apparently, I'm closer to the aphant end.
Thank you to Net Galley and Little Brown Spark Publishing for allowing me to read an advance copy.
Thank you to Net Galley and Little Brown Spark Publishing for allowing me to read an advance copy.
October 6, 2024
Delightful and informative!
December 4, 2024
“Brains are complicated, the world is equally complex, and everything we think we know is provisional.”
Whether you meet Sadie Dingfelder once or a thousand times, she will probably not recognise you, or remember your name, or recall a thing about you. She’s not self absorbed, or rude, Sadie has prosopagnosia.
Colloquially known as faceblindness, it is a neurological condition that affects approximately 2-2.5% of the population to some degree, and in her case quite severely. The diagnosis prompts Dingfelder to undertake further neurological testing and learns she is also stereoblind (lacking depth perception), aphantasiac (has a blank mind’s eye), and SDAM (severely deficient autobiographical memory).
We tend to forget that not everyone sees the world the same until global debate break out about whether the colour of a dress is gold or blue. Despite a lifetime of mishaps, misidentifications and miscommunications, Dingfelder rarely considered that her experience might differ markedly from others.
Written with humour and sincerity Do I Know You? is a fascinating account of the journalist’s personal experience during her diagnostic journey and her concurrent investigation of the field of neuroscience. As she seeks out and undergoes testing by experts in their respective fields, Dingfelder interprets the science in an accessible way while sharing her feelings about the process and its results. I was absorbed in both elements of the well balanced, largely chronological narrative, and feel like I have learned a lot.
As I read Do I Know You? I found myself reframing the behaviours of family, friends, and myself. I’m fairly certain my oldest son has a degree of developmental prosopagnosia and going forward I will be far less frustrated with this ‘quirk’ of his. I myself have intermittent steroblindness as a result of being born with strabismus (childhood therapy corrected it but ageing is causing a relapse), which I now realise probably contributes to my regular left-right confusion, and poor spatial awareness.
Revelatory and entertaining I highly recommend Do I Know You? to everyone, this was a five star read for me.
Whether you meet Sadie Dingfelder once or a thousand times, she will probably not recognise you, or remember your name, or recall a thing about you. She’s not self absorbed, or rude, Sadie has prosopagnosia.
Colloquially known as faceblindness, it is a neurological condition that affects approximately 2-2.5% of the population to some degree, and in her case quite severely. The diagnosis prompts Dingfelder to undertake further neurological testing and learns she is also stereoblind (lacking depth perception), aphantasiac (has a blank mind’s eye), and SDAM (severely deficient autobiographical memory).
We tend to forget that not everyone sees the world the same until global debate break out about whether the colour of a dress is gold or blue. Despite a lifetime of mishaps, misidentifications and miscommunications, Dingfelder rarely considered that her experience might differ markedly from others.
Written with humour and sincerity Do I Know You? is a fascinating account of the journalist’s personal experience during her diagnostic journey and her concurrent investigation of the field of neuroscience. As she seeks out and undergoes testing by experts in their respective fields, Dingfelder interprets the science in an accessible way while sharing her feelings about the process and its results. I was absorbed in both elements of the well balanced, largely chronological narrative, and feel like I have learned a lot.
As I read Do I Know You? I found myself reframing the behaviours of family, friends, and myself. I’m fairly certain my oldest son has a degree of developmental prosopagnosia and going forward I will be far less frustrated with this ‘quirk’ of his. I myself have intermittent steroblindness as a result of being born with strabismus (childhood therapy corrected it but ageing is causing a relapse), which I now realise probably contributes to my regular left-right confusion, and poor spatial awareness.
Revelatory and entertaining I highly recommend Do I Know You? to everyone, this was a five star read for me.
July 15, 2025
3.5. I liked this book! I picked it up for the “neurodivergent/disabled author” category of the Boston Public Library summer reading challenge. Very cool and very interesting to read about types of neurodivergence that I knew little about. A fun mix of science and narrative.
August 25, 2025
An excellent mix of charming, extremely well written, informative, funny, and evocative! Highly recommend! Also she’s a fellow smithy and it’s wonderful to get to recommend a book by someone from my alma mater
March 9, 2025
4.5 stars
March 25, 2025
this was a solid comprehensive look into the author’s experience living with and uncovering different neurodivergent traits, most of which i wasn’t familiar with before reading! it was a pretty balanced mix of personal experience and scientific backstory all explained in a quirky, easy to understand way - i recommend the audiobook read by the author. it only took me so long because i’m not always in an audiobook mood but was never disinterested by any means
October 27, 2024
Fascinating.
December 30, 2024
Wow! What a fun and fascinating read. The author does an excellent job of making complex scientific material easy to understand, and she writes with so much voice. The only reason I can’t give this five stars is the ending of the book felt abrupt to me. But overall, I highly recommend it!
October 12, 2024
Interesting. Lots of information about the range of brain differences we have. It irks me that some are called typical. We don’t know how much people accommodate the status quo. When humans learn to celebrate diversity we might actually become viable for the long term.
December 24, 2025
This book was so fun and informative! The author came across as funny and charming, even if her stories about driving stressed me the hell out. I learned so much about different conditions and types of neurodivergence that I didn't even know existed before, or didn't know much about. Through learning about these things I even found out that I myself have one of them! I had heard of aphantasia before, but I didn't know it had an opposite condition, hyperphantasia. I have always known I had something weird about my brain when it comes to visualization and memory, but I don't quite fit the criteria for HSAM. Pretty sure after reading this that it's hyperphantasia, which makes so much sense in so many ways. Nifty!
I will forever be baffled that the author and everyone in her life were oblivious to all of these issues she has until she was in her FORTIES, though. Girl, what.
I will forever be baffled that the author and everyone in her life were oblivious to all of these issues she has until she was in her FORTIES, though. Girl, what.
April 17, 2024
Such a well written, interesting book! I really love this author.
September 29, 2025
so this is mostly a memoir combined with nonfiction about all the authors various types of Neuro-atypicalia. the narrator at first comes across as a ditzy not so bright individual but as you progress you realize that she is actually an incredibly intelligent, witty, well spoken, individual. and she's really funny to boot. I highly recommend this to anyone who likes to learn science stuff and laugh along the way.
December 15, 2025
This is a fascinating pop science explanation of various neurological conditions affecting memory and imagination with some try hard quirky humor thrown in.
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