Edward the Conqueror

by Roald Dahl

Edward the Conqueror is a brilliant gem of a short story from Roald Dahl, the master of the sting in the tail.In Edward the Conqueror, Roald Dahl, one of the world's favourite authors, tells a sinister story about the darker side of human nature. Here, a cat's curious behaviour comes between a husband and his wife . . .Edward the Conqueror is taken from the short story collection Kiss Kiss, which includes ten other devious and shocking stories, featuring the wife who pawns the mink coat from her lover with unexpected results; the priceless piece of furniture that is the subject of a deceitful bargain; a wronged woman taking revenge on her dead husband, and others.'Unnerving bedtime stories, subtle, proficient, hair-raising and done to a turn.' (San Francisco Chronicle )This story is also available as a Penguin digital audio download read by Juliet Stevenson.Roald Dahl, the brilliant and worldwide acclaimed author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, James and the Giant Peach, Matilda, and many more classics for children, also wrote scores of short stories for adults. These delightfully disturbing tales have often been filmed and were most recently the inspiration for the West End play, Roald Dahl's Twisted Tales by Jeremy Dyson. Roald Dahl's stories continue to make readers shiver today.

Genres: Short Stories, Fiction, Cats, Horror, Animals

26 pages, Kindle Edition

First published September 13, 2012

About the author

Roald Dahl was a beloved British author, poet, screenwriter, and wartime fighter pilot, best known for his enchanting and often darkly humorous children's books that have captivated generations of readers around the world. Born in Llandaff, Wales, to Norwegian parents, Dahl led a life marked by adventure, tragedy, creativity, and enduring literary success. His vivid imagination and distinctive storytelling style have made him one of the most celebrated children's authors in modern literature.
Before becoming a writer, Dahl lived a life filled with excitement and hardship. He served as a Royal Air Force pilot during World War II, surviving a near-fatal crash in the Libyan desert. His wartime experiences and travels deeply influenced his storytelling, often infusing his works with a sense of danger, resilience, and the triumph of the underdog. After the war, he began writing for both adults and children, showing a rare versatility that spanned genres and age groups.
Dahl's children's books are known for their playful use of language, unforgettable characters, and a deep sense of justice, often pitting clever children against cruel or foolish adults. Some of his most iconic titles include Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Matilda, The BFG, James and the Giant Peach, Fantastic Mr Fox, and The Witches. These works are filled with fantastical elements and moral undertones, empowering young readers to challenge authority, think independently, and believe in the impossible.
Equally acclaimed for his work for adults, Dahl wrote numerous short stories characterized by their macabre twists and dark humor. His stories were frequently published in magazines such as The New Yorker and later compiled into bestselling collections like Someone Like You and Kiss Kiss. He also wrote screenplays, including the James Bond film You Only Live Twice and the adaptation of Ian Fleming's Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
Despite his literary success, Dahl was a complex and sometimes controversial figure, known for his strong opinions and difficult personality. Nonetheless, his books continue to be treasured for their wit, originality, and the sense of wonder they inspire. Many of his stories have been adapted into successful films, stage plays, and television specials, further cementing his legacy.
Dahl's impact on children's literature is immeasurable. His ability to connect with young readers through a mix of irreverence, heart, and imagination has made his stories timeless. Even after his death, his books remain in print and continue to be read by millions of children worldwide. His writing not only entertains but also encourages curiosity, courage, and compassion.
Roald Dahl's work lives on as a testament to the power of storytelling and the magic of a truly original voice. He remains a towering figure in literature whose creations continue to spark joy, mischief, and inspiration across generations.

Reviews

[Chantal · Rating 4 out of 5]

It started off as a great story, but I didn't like the ending. However, it doesn't surprise me that this was the ending of it all. I give the story a 4.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

بابا پیشی بدبخت رو چیکار داشتی؟؟!!!

[Michele · Rating 2 out of 5]

spoiler: HE KILLS THE CAT.

I liked it up until then. now I hate it.

[itchy · Rating 3 out of 5]

29november2019

read as part of the collection kiss kiss.

[Forked Radish · Rating 4 out of 5]

The cat-astrophic consequences of classical concerto connoisseurship.

[Anna Gorbušinová · Rating 2 out of 5]

I am confused.

[Sarah Elizabeth · Rating 3 out of 5]

Part of The Complete Short Stories: Volume One 1944-1953

* Edward The Conqueror - 2.5 stars - A woman goes outside to call her husband in for lunch, and discovers a grey cat sitting near her husband's bonfire. She plays the piano and decides that the cat is the reincarnation of a famous composer. She starts treating the cat like a king and the husband doesn't like it, so he gets rid of the cat. Dull again, and so cruel that the husband did what he did!

[Karna · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.25

[وائل المنعم · Rating 2 out of 5]

قصة مخيفة، قط بهذه الصفات يخيف أشجع القلوب، لا أعرف كيف وقعت الزوجة في حبه.

[Mayumi · Rating 2 out of 5]

Acho que essa história tinha um bom argumento -- o casal encontra um gato que eles deixam entrar em casa; a esposa acredita que o gato é o compositor Franz Liszt reencarnado e o marido não quer saber de nada disso -- mas foi executado de maneira muito ruim. Um sentimento de que estava tudo errado foi tomando conta de mim enquanto eu lia esse conto, não por mérito da escrita, mas pela maneira como o conto retratava a mulher em sua ... loucura (não sei se loucura é uma boa palavra pra descrever as coisas que a mulher falava e acreditava). Talvez o autor queria que o final fosse uma reviravolta, mas eu o vi vindo quando o gato apareceu na casa e que grande besteira esse título.

[Abigail · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious. 😺

[Dom · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nice classical music references but far from Dahl’s best short stories

[Maksud Yılmaz · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not bad

[Schreient Kreuz · Rating 3 out of 5]

The story starts of good and fun, but I hated how her husband killed the cat.

[mokshali · Rating 4 out of 5]

it was over too quickly for me to get invested but super fun to read while listening to the pieces listed in the story

[Marene · Rating 2 out of 5]

Kijk die vrouw is dan een beetje gestoord met dat een of andere kat een beroemde componist zou zijn geweest. Maar die kat had niet hoeven sterven

[mrs rhys · Rating 3 out of 5]

This would've been a favourite but the ending ruined it 😓

[Heidi de Goede · Rating 3 out of 5]

No Edward!

[Anirudh Mannattil · Rating 4 out of 5]

A rather amusing short. Dahl's flavor shines through but the impact is heavily limited by the length.

[Mariana · Rating 1 out of 5]

Worst story so far from Roald Dahl.

[Susanna · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars. Creepy.

[Peter Csanadi · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75⭐️

[Roman Roziňák · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not very interesting

[Esha · Rating 2 out of 5]

Read in 2023 as part of Kiss Kiss, Tales of the Unexpected, The Best of Roald Dahl, and Twenty Nine Kisses From Roald Dahl.

[Courtney Schafer · Rating 4 out of 5]

If the wife was already crazed about the cat being a composer, how did Edward not anticipate her reaction to what he did with the cat? The ending is too upsetting.