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The Blurred Cross: A Writer's Difficult Journey with God
In early 2022, esteemed New Testament scholar Richard Bauckham nearly lost his ability to read--an alarming prospect for a man who considers reading, writing, and scholarly work to be his vocation from God. Despite it being one of the most difficult times of his life, it was also a period in which Bauckham felt closest to God.In this beautifully written book, Bauckham combines memoir, theological and biblical reflection, and poetry to offer profound insight into God's providence amid life's difficulties. He discusses relevant aspects of his earlier life, delves into the time when his eyesight began to deteriorate, and reflects on issues that arose during that period. The book also includes generous amounts of Bauckham's own poetry.Throughout his experience, Bauckham maintained a close relationship with God and drew nearer to him. His journey with God during this time led him to contemplate God's purpose for his life and how he can live in a way that reflects his overwhelming sense of gratitude. He shares his story as a way of encouraging others in their own unique walk with God.
208 pages, Paperback
Published July 23, 2024
17 people are currently reading
112 people want to read
About the author
Richard Bauckham
93 books258 followersRichard Bauckham (PhD, University of Cambridge) is senior scholar at Ridley Hall, Cambridge University, in Cambridge, England, where he teaches for the Cambridge Federation of Theological Colleges. He is also a visiting professor at St. Mellitus College, London, and emeritus professor of New Testament at the University of St. Andrews. He is a Fellow of the British Academy and the author of numerous books.
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Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews
August 16, 2024
This is a delightful book. It will perhaps be most interesting to those who are familiar with Bauckham’s scholarship (i always enjoy hearing first person reflection from an otherwise academic). I found it helpful to hear him talk out loud about how he is striving to believe and have hope even as he faces his personal fear of not being able to see or read anymore.
The book itself is sometimes surprisingly poetic; sometimes very boring and mundane; sometimes brilliantly profound!
The book itself is sometimes surprisingly poetic; sometimes very boring and mundane; sometimes brilliantly profound!
December 27, 2024
A marvellous combination of memoir, theology, and poetry, by one of our leading New Testamentx scholars--albeit one "never able to confine his interests to a narrow field," according to his appended bio.
“A second reason for finding providence a problematic concept today... is the characteristically modern sense of the controllability of the world by humans.... Approaching every aspect of life with the desire to control makes the very idea of God undesirable. For God is the ultimately uncontrollable one whom we can recognize as active in the world only if we are open to the significance of what simply happens to us or is simply given to us, entirely beyond our control.” 98, 101
“We should not be so self-centered as to forget that God's purposes in the world go way beyond ourselves. That was the lesson Job had to learn. Collaborating with God in those wider purposes means accepting outcomes that we would not have wished for ourselves. At times his providence may seem utterly opaque to us. But even as we cry, “Why? Why” in bewilderment, we can still trust that his love for us has not diminished and will ensure our ultimate good.” 110
Charis (grace), like agape (love) “is one of those Greek words that were rather unremarkable in their ordinary use but that early Christians made into ways of saying some very distinctively Christian things.... Charis means basically ‘giving’—not so much ‘gift,’ in the sense of the thing that is given, but ‘giving,’ in the sense of the act of giving.” 145
“A second reason for finding providence a problematic concept today... is the characteristically modern sense of the controllability of the world by humans.... Approaching every aspect of life with the desire to control makes the very idea of God undesirable. For God is the ultimately uncontrollable one whom we can recognize as active in the world only if we are open to the significance of what simply happens to us or is simply given to us, entirely beyond our control.” 98, 101
“We should not be so self-centered as to forget that God's purposes in the world go way beyond ourselves. That was the lesson Job had to learn. Collaborating with God in those wider purposes means accepting outcomes that we would not have wished for ourselves. At times his providence may seem utterly opaque to us. But even as we cry, “Why? Why” in bewilderment, we can still trust that his love for us has not diminished and will ensure our ultimate good.” 110
Charis (grace), like agape (love) “is one of those Greek words that were rather unremarkable in their ordinary use but that early Christians made into ways of saying some very distinctively Christian things.... Charis means basically ‘giving’—not so much ‘gift,’ in the sense of the thing that is given, but ‘giving,’ in the sense of the act of giving.” 145
July 9, 2024
"The Blurred Cross" by Richard Bauckham
4🌟/5🌟
Richard Bauckham is a highly respected Biblical scholar and theologian. I read his work "Jesus and the Eyewitnesses" and I am making my way through "Gospel Women."
This book is a departure from a major academic work. This is an intimate memoir where Richard Bauckham shares his story of suffering and discusses his experience when he believed he would lose his vision.
Losing vision would be terrifying to anyone. For Richard Bauckham, the threat of vision loss was particularly painful because of his love for reading, poetry, and academia. So much of his life, his career, and his personal interests required his ability to see, be it reading, studying, or writing. Without his vision, he faced a future cut off from the many things he loved.
This book is also filled with reflections and personal poetry. As the reader, I couldn't help but think of this as if Richard was sharing his diary and his deepest thoughts and fears. His faith during a challenging circumstance is inspiring to me and makes me appreciate his academic work even mode. This book helped reconsider my own perspective on faith, belief, hope, steadfastness, and suffering.
I recommend this book to anyone who may want to see the author behind such great academic contributions in theology and Biblical scholarship. After reading this book, I have such an appreciation for Richard's deep, sincere, and compelling faith.
4🌟/5🌟
Richard Bauckham is a highly respected Biblical scholar and theologian. I read his work "Jesus and the Eyewitnesses" and I am making my way through "Gospel Women."
This book is a departure from a major academic work. This is an intimate memoir where Richard Bauckham shares his story of suffering and discusses his experience when he believed he would lose his vision.
Losing vision would be terrifying to anyone. For Richard Bauckham, the threat of vision loss was particularly painful because of his love for reading, poetry, and academia. So much of his life, his career, and his personal interests required his ability to see, be it reading, studying, or writing. Without his vision, he faced a future cut off from the many things he loved.
This book is also filled with reflections and personal poetry. As the reader, I couldn't help but think of this as if Richard was sharing his diary and his deepest thoughts and fears. His faith during a challenging circumstance is inspiring to me and makes me appreciate his academic work even mode. This book helped reconsider my own perspective on faith, belief, hope, steadfastness, and suffering.
I recommend this book to anyone who may want to see the author behind such great academic contributions in theology and Biblical scholarship. After reading this book, I have such an appreciation for Richard's deep, sincere, and compelling faith.
June 18, 2024
If anyone ever asks me the question ‘who would you choose to have at a dinner party if you could invite anyone?’ my answer invariably includes Richard Bauckham. And this book reads as if we are pulling up armchairs by the fire for a chat after dinner, discussing life’s challenges and how we can respond.
It is impossible to pin down the genre of this book – while it is a personal and honest memoir of a few months of Richard Bauckham’s life, it is also a theological musing on suffering, and a Biblical study and book of poetry. But somehow, the book hangs together beautifully and is easy to read, while still being challenging and real. There are no cliches about suffering here, but there is a lot of deep contemplation. By looking squarely at personal suffering - perhaps surprisingly - it also becomes a handbook for others who are experiencing difficulties in their journey of life.
I would highly recommend this book to anyone, Christian or not, suffering or not. If you want a fireside chat with Richard Bauckham about how he dealt with a challenge in his life, this book is for you.
It is impossible to pin down the genre of this book – while it is a personal and honest memoir of a few months of Richard Bauckham’s life, it is also a theological musing on suffering, and a Biblical study and book of poetry. But somehow, the book hangs together beautifully and is easy to read, while still being challenging and real. There are no cliches about suffering here, but there is a lot of deep contemplation. By looking squarely at personal suffering - perhaps surprisingly - it also becomes a handbook for others who are experiencing difficulties in their journey of life.
I would highly recommend this book to anyone, Christian or not, suffering or not. If you want a fireside chat with Richard Bauckham about how he dealt with a challenge in his life, this book is for you.
November 28, 2025
This book didn't just move me because of the author's heartfelt journey with God regarding something so precious to him - his sight - but also the gentle theological ways that he grappled with really hard subjects, such as the providence of God, in such a compact memoir. It also follows his struggle with getting care in the NHS, which resonates with my experience, and his quiet life in England.
I didn't think this little book would captivate me since it's written by an introverted septuagenarian English Anglican bible scholar (okay, maybe I should have been more self aware) but I found it to b be that beautiful. I'm also delighted to have found a prolific theologian that I can read for years to come.
I didn't think this little book would captivate me since it's written by an introverted septuagenarian English Anglican bible scholar (okay, maybe I should have been more self aware) but I found it to b be that beautiful. I'm also delighted to have found a prolific theologian that I can read for years to come.
July 26, 2024
Bauchman pulls back the curtain of a theologian’s life to reveal the tension between circumstances and faith through a personal physical challenge. This brief book (by his standards) explores his thoughts on providence, dreams, discipleship and community as he struggles with his vision. His expressions through poetry were moving and chapter on gratitude was worth the price of the book.
Displaying 1 - 6 of 6 reviews