Sugar on the Bones

Hap and Leonard #13

by Joe R. Lansdale

In this holy mess of a case for the "perpetual bad boy" (New York Times) sleuths in the beloved Hap and Leonard series, PI Duo Hap and Leonard investigate the untimely death of a woman whose family stood much to gain from her passing.

Minnie Polson is dead. Burned to a crisp in a fire so big and bad it had to be deliberate. The only thing worse is that Hap and Leonard could have prevented it. Maybe. Minnie had a feeling she was being targeted, shaken down by some shadowy force. However, when she’d solicited Hap & Leonard, all it took was one off color joke to turn her sour and she’d called them off the investigation. Wracked with a guilty conscience, the two PIs—along with Hap’s fleet-footed wife, Brett—tuck in to the case. As they look closer, they dredge up troublesome for one, Minnie’s daughter, Alice, has recently vanished. She’d been hard up after her pet grooming business went under and was in line to collect a whopping insurance sum should anything happen to her mother. The same was due to Minnie’s estranged husband, Al, whose kryptonite (beautiful, money-grubbing women) had left him with only a run-down mobile home. But did Minnie’s foolish, cash-strapped family really have it in them to commit a crime this grisly? Or is there a larger, far more sinister scheme at work?
Irreverent, wise-cracking, and full of atmosphere and bite, Sugar on the Bones is not to be missed. 

Genres: Mystery, Crime, Noir, Fiction, Thriller, Mystery Thriller, Action

336 pages, Kindle Edition

First published July 16, 2024

About the author

Champion Mojo Storyteller Joe R. Lansdale is the author of over forty novels and numerous short stories. His work has appeared in national anthologies, magazines, and collections, as well as numerous foreign publications. He has written for comics, television, film, newspapers, and Internet sites. His work has been collected in more than two dozen short-story collections, and he has edited or co-edited over a dozen anthologies. He has received the Edgar Award, eight Bram Stoker Awards, the Horror Writers Association Lifetime Achievement Award, the British Fantasy Award, the Grinzani Cavour Prize for Literature, the Herodotus Historical Fiction Award, the Inkpot Award for Contributions to Science Fiction and Fantasy, and many others. His novella Bubba Ho-Tep was adapted to film by Don Coscarelli, starring Bruce Campbell and Ossie Davis. His story "Incident On and Off a Mountain Road" was adapted to film for Showtime's "Masters of Horror," and he adapted his short story "Christmas with the Dead" to film hisownself. The film adaptation of his novel Cold in July was nominated for the Grand Jury Prize at the Sundance Film Festival, and the Sundance Channel has adapted his Hap & Leonard novels for television.

He is currently co-producing several films, among them The Bottoms, based on his Edgar Award-winning novel, with Bill Paxton and Brad Wyman, and The Drive-In, with Greg Nicotero. He is Writer In Residence at Stephen F. Austin State University, and is the founder of the martial arts system Shen Chuan: Martial Science and its affiliate, Shen Chuan Family System. He is a member of both the United States and International Martial Arts Halls of Fame. He lives in Nacogdoches, Texas with his wife, dog, and two cats.

Reviews

[Dave Edmunds]

"Wherever you guys tread, disaster follows, two times squared with shit-stained shoes"

4.25 ⭐'s

Initial Thoughts

If you know me, then you know I'm the biggest Hap and Leonard fan ever. Numerous uno. That's right. Or at least I think I am.

But it turns out I'm really not. Unbeknownst to me, there was a new book in the series released in July last year (2024)! How did I not know about this? I'm absolutely raging. But then I realised I now have one more chance to have an outting with my two best pals...that's Hap Collins and Leonard Pine. That calls for a celebration. Life doesn't get any better. So pass that bottle of Jack right here.

Lansdale's been writing the Hap and Leonard series now for over thirty years. That dates back to the pairs first outing in Savage Season in 1990. And it's been one hell of a ride. If you're reading this and it's all new to you, I suggest starting right there and following the logical sequence.

This is not your normal detective fiction!
Hap and Leonard are one of the most unlikely couples out there. Hap is a liberal, East Texas boy who’s done some time, for protesting against the war, and Leonard is a gay, Republican, Vietnam vet. They have almost nothing in common. But that's why it works! They poke fun at each other at every opportunity, but they're as close as brothers and always have each others backs.

So I hope that sums up why I love this series. Great characters with fantastic action and side splitting humour. This is why I read fiction.

The Story

The story kicks off with Hap and Leonard's old friend Marvin Hanson referring them to a potential client, Minnie Polson. Her daughter is missing and she's desperate to find her. And she's hoping they can help her where the local police haven't. But Minnie doesn't exactly hit it off with Hap's wife Brett and they don't end up taking the case.

But the next thing they hear about poor old Minnie is that she was found a little bit dead. Burnt to a bloody crisp! Could Hap and Leonard have prevented it? It's a question that's going to keep them awake at night if they don't do something about it. And it's never like them to walk away when an innocent party has been wronged. So with the help of Brett they start to dig.

Even though Minnie was never their client, and was no longer alive to pay them even if she had been, they feel some kind of obligation to follow things up and find out what the hell happened. Was it all accidental or is there foul play at hand? Well the harder they look the worse things start to get. But isn't that always the case when Hap and Leonard are involved?

Final Thoughts

Sugar on the Bones was an absolute blast and a worthy continuation of the previous works. Just what I needed. Sometimes you take a break from a series and forget just how much you enjoy them.

Lansdale's ability as a storyteller hasn't changed and he's on form once again here. What you're getting is a fast paced, action packed mystery with plenty of off the wall humour. Honestly, if that ain't selling it to you then nothing will.

One thing that really stood out for me is that Hap and Leonard are starting to get pretty god damn old. Aren't we all! But it's great how Lansdale has managed this and put it across in a realistic way. They've still got their faults, and certain aspects of their character will never change, but they are certainly wiser in how they view things...most of the time...a little bit.

So I'll finish things off by making a heartfelt request. Please Joe don't let this be the last Hap and Leonard book. I've just realised that I'm not ready for that yet. Just next time make sure it's advertised a bit more so I can read it on release day. That's not too much to ask is it?

Thanks for reading and...cheers!

[Bill Riggs]

Storyteller, Joe R. Lansdale, crafts a tale better than most other authors. The dialogue, settings and situations are pure East Texas. It’s like going home again, that is if your home is a twisted up, crazy Texas town populated by eccentric characters created out of a madman’s fever dream, but you can be sure that righteousness will eventually win out over the forces of darkness. There may be blood and bodies along the way but our intrepid and reluctant heroes will persevere.

[Alfonso D'agostino]

Sarà che siamo al mare ma piove. E, si sa, il grigio di una giornata grigia sul mare grigio è più grigio della più grigia città grigia.

O sarà che ho finito l’ultimo Lansdale alle 5.20 di mattina con un gatto che insisteva ad utilizzare la mia faccia come il più comodo dei cuscini.

Però, ecco, “Zucchero sulle ossa” mi ha lasciato un pochino di malinconia.

Intendiamoci, le avventure di Hap & Leonard valgono sempre almeno quattro stelle: i due protagonisti costituiscono probabilmente l’accoppiata più efficace di genere degli ultimi lustri. I dialoghi - fra loro due in particolare - sono magnifici, un paio di pagine regalano purissimo divertimento e la scrittura di Lansdale, con quelle metafore non-elegantissime-eufemismo, allieta infinitamente.

Ma, cavolo, Hap & Leonard stanno invecchiando. Stavo scrivendo “come è giusto che sia”, ma no, non è mica giusto. Ci sono già io con un menisco stridulo a dire “oplà” quando mi alzo dal divano, e oggi avrei avuto bisogno di leggere che per qualcuno il tempo non passa, anche se è fatto di carta e inchiostro.

C’è il solito Texas sporco, cattivo, eppure venato di insospettabile tenerezza. C’è, soprattutto, una sottile aria di stanchezza, di fine della partita, di note finali dell’overture.

[Ben A]

Champion Mojo Storyteller Joe R. Lansdale returns to Hap and Leonard after an extended absence and delivers a fun, well-done, if not spectacular novel. This one had a wild, mysterious plot and zigged and zagged all over the place in the way the later Hap and Leonard books have done. I'll say that while this one was wasn't up to the incredibly high standards of the earlier books, a weaker Hap and Leonard story or a weaker Lansdale story all together is still much better than quite a bit of what I read on a weekly basis. It had a one-last-ride feel to it and if this is the end, it certainly was a great, fun way to go out.

Special Thanks to Mulholland Books and Netgalley for the digital ARC. This was given to me for an honest review.

[Luca Masera]

Zucchero sulle ossa si inserisce con forza malinconica nel ciclo di Hap e Leonard, confermando la capacità di Lansdale di fondere pulp, humour e riflessioni più amare. L’indagine è, come sempre, un pretesto narrativo per mettere in scena la straordinaria complicità di Hap e Leonard, sempre violenti, ironici e al tempo stesso teneri (straordinario un passaggio in cui Hap rimbocca le coperte a Leonard che si è addormentato).

Quello che però mi ha colpito di più è stato il lento insinuarsi del tempo: Hap e Leonard non sono più i ragazzi indistruttibili dei primi volumi. Il loro corpo li tradisce, la fatica pesa e nei dialoghi serpeggia il fantasma della fine. Lansdale, senza mai rinunciare al ritmo e al sarcasmo, lascia intravedere l’ombra della vecchiaia, come una patina che avvolge il loro legame indissolubile.

Ho riso e mi sono sporcato di sangue e sudore insieme a loro, come ogni volta, ma quando ho chiuso il libro mi è rimasta una sottile amarezza: la sensazione che anche gli eroi più vitali non possano sfuggire all’usura del tempo. Zucchero sulle ossa è un romanzo che, sotto la scorza dura del noir alla Lansdale, vibra di nostalgia e ci ricorda che ogni avventura porta con sé il peso di ciò che finisce.

[Dan]

This was one of the better Hap and Leonard books of the last ten years or so. Hap and Leonard go up against a gang of organ thieves but their real enemy is old age and not really wanting to keep on living the lives of violence they've been living but not knowing how to stop.

[Abibliofob]

Hap and Leonard is not your everyday heroes and they have a somewhat loose opinion on what is justice. Joe R. Lansdale has once again written a masterpiece but I didn't expect anything less from this author. Sugar on the Bones is the 13th book in this series and I really had fun reading it. I wish the tv series had gone on a little longer but it's sadly impossible due to Leonard not being around anymore. The story is as always well written and filled with witty dialogue and I was surprised that the duo left Texas to finish of the job. I will always recommend this series to people that wants a good book to read that is not like everything else.

[Jim Kownacki]

This 13th installment of the Hap and Leonard series was worth the 5 year wait. An with an aging Hap and Leonard (they both mention getting older multiple times) and the return of some of their brothers and sisters in arms this is a rip roaring good time in east Texas but it made me think that this may be their last roundup.

[Maria]

Psicologico. Avvincente. Suggestivo. Eccezionale.

[Sjgomzi]

Like getting to hang out with old friends. ❤️ And still fun and hilarious after all these years. As long as Lansdale keeps writing them, I’ll keep buying and reading them.

[Paul]

4*

More of Hap & Leonard's adventures and lots of fun. Possibly my favourite out of the most recent 3 H&L novels.

[Annissa]

tre stelle e mezza

[Bobparr]

Libro piacevolissimo, c’è da chiedersi come Lansdale faccia a scrivere sempre in modo così scorrevole, scorretto, divertente.
La trama è secondaria, lo svolgimento come di prammatica scoppiettante.

[J. Griff]

I truly love this series & the characters within it. Lansdale has done such an amazing job. This book picks up a bit of time after “The Elephant of Surprise”. Things are going good in Hap & Brett’s marriage. Their daughter Chance is on her own with Reba (400 year old vampire) & Buffy the dog. Leonard & Pooky are getting closer & marriage might be in the works. The years are starting to catch up with both Hap & Leonard.
They get a tip from Marvin Hanson, now retired police chief, about a case & due to a misunderstanding fail to get hired by the client. The next day the client & her house is incinerated with Brett feeling guilty she, Hap & Leonard start poking around.
The humour in this book is softer than in previous novels, but still fun. The ending felt a bit rushed, but I get the feeling that this series is ending. Which I find tragic as I love all these characters.

[Tim Schneider]

Hap and Leonard are back after a five year hiatus and I was able to work this in to my reading schedule a mere three months after publication. I've said before and I'll say again that Joe R. Lansdale is one of my favorite current authors and that I really love the characters of Hap Collins and Leonard Pine. That said, some of the later novels in the series have been hit and miss. I felt that the last entry, Elephant of Surprise, was one of the weakest in the series. Unfortunately, this one wasn't much better.

There's a bit of a feeling of closure in this one as we get most of the supporting characters from the series showing up and active. Brett, Hansen, Jim Bob Luke, and Vanilla Ride are here. But Chance and Reba, while mentioned, aren't. So if this is a closure, it's not full. I'll admit, I've never liked the character of Vanilla Ride. I've never felt she really fit the feel of the books and this time, as is often the case, she acts as a deus ex machina and I don't need that.

There are things to like here. Hap and Leonard feel much more in character than they did in Elephant, where they were seldom funny and suffered from late-stage John McClaneism. They're much more vulnerable here. They acknowledge they are aging and probably too old for this shit. Leonard wants to get out of the private investigator thing and marry Pookie. Hap wants to get out too, but he won't because it's Brett's business. I love that.

But it still suffers, as the series increasingly has from escalating threat syndrome. It's even mentioned that the villains here are almost cartoonishly supervillainously evil. It's too much. Hap and Leonard are just guys who get stuff done because it needs done and nobody else is going to do it. They aren't superheroes and shouldn't be. They have native intelligence and are well-trained and experienced martial artists...but they also just kind of muddle through in spite of themselves. The escalating threats have never set well with me.

All this seems pretty negative. And I guess it is. This is pretty easily in the bottom third of the books in the series. It's worth a read but it's weak Hap and Leonard and weak Lansdale.

[Craig Childs]

"Nothing is about common sense anymore, and lies, not to mention stupid belief systems, are common currency."

Minnie Polson is a rich client who wants to hire Brett Sawyer Investigations to find her missing adult daughter, but after Brett makes an off-color joke about Minnie's pronouns, the deal falls apart…

When Minnie's house is burned to the ground two days later--only Minnie's crisped arm survives--Brett begins poking around, guilt-ridden that she may be responsible for the eccentric woman's demise…

Minnie's daughter Alice and her philandering ex-husband Al both stand to gain financially from Minnie's death. However, they both could be the targets of suspicious hangers-on in their lives who may be scamming them for the insurance money…

It is nice to catch up with Hap, Leonard, and their friends again after a five-year hiatus (six for me, because I somehow missed this book's release last year). There are a few niggling inconsistencies and gaps in the plot, but the boys are back to their old ways: wisecracking, getting into scrapes, and generally failing to adapt to modern life.

One prevalent source of humor comes from the fact that Hap, a pragmatic Vietnam-protesting Democrat, struggles to come to grips with the PC speak and the "woke" conformity demanded by liberals today. The right of everyone to speak their minds and live how they want to live is disappearing on both sides of the political spectrum.

As you might guess, the investigation into Minnie's murder uncovers a wide-ranging crime ring--things get serious with the return of Kung Fu Bobby! Murder, insurance scams, illegal organ harvesting, offshore money laundering.

Almost all the series' colorful secondary characters show up to help--Marvin Hanson, Martin Veil, Jim Bob Luke, and Vanilla Ride.

There are multiple life-and-death surprises that I don't want to spoil, but I did not see them coming.

This is not the best entry in the series. It is comfortable, like putting on a pair of well-worn sweatpants. There is a certain kick in the whole "team" showing up, but it also defuses the tension. The star power shifts the focus away from Hap and Leonard, which is a shame because they are still the most interesting characters.

3 stars

[Antonio Parrilla]

Ho assegnato 3 stelle a Zucchero sulle ossa, una valutazione che non avrei pensato di dare a un romanzo con Hap e Leonard come protagonisti. È infatti la prima volta che questi personaggi, da sempre uno dei punti di forza di Lansdale, mi hanno restituito una sensazione di scarsa naturalezza.
L’elemento che più mi ha lasciato perplesso è proprio l’ironia, marchio di fabbrica dello stile dell’autore. Qui appare spesso forzata e caricaturale, come se i dialoghi e le battute cercassero deliberatamente l’effetto, invece di nascere in modo spontaneo dalla situazione o dalla personalità dei personaggi. Hap e Leonard sembrano talvolta imitare sé stessi, perdendo quella freschezza e quella autenticità che li hanno resi memorabili nei romanzi precedenti.
La trama resta solida e leggibile, e non manca l’abilità narrativa che da sempre contraddistingue Lansdale, ma il piacere della lettura ne risente proprio perché viene meno l’equilibrio tra azione, ironia e umanità che ha fatto la fortuna della serie.
Continuerò a dare fiducia all’autore, perché il suo talento è fuori discussione e il legame con questi personaggi resta forte. Mi auguro però che nei prossimi romanzi torni quella leggerezza naturale e quella vivacità autentica che hanno reso Hap e Leonard così unici.

[GONZA]

The fact that several of the old friends (Hanson, John Bob, Veil, Vanilla) return in this adventure of Hap and Leonard is alarming to me because I have the impression that it is a farewell to one of the best series I have read in recent years. The pace is high, the exchanges between Leonard and Hap often leave me with tears in my eyes from laughing, as does the utter lack of romance in the romance between Brett and Hap. Someday, I will probably reread the whole series, but in the meantime I still enjoy the pleasant aftertaste of this latest novel.

Il fatto che in questa avventura di Hap e Leonard tornino parecchi dei vecchi amici (Hanson, Joe Bob, Veil, Vanilla), mi mette paura perché ho come l'impressione che sia un congedo da una delle serie migliori che mi sia capitato di leggere in questi ultimi anni. Il ritmo é alto, gli scambi tra Leonard ed Hap mi lasciano spesso le lacrime agli occhi dalle risate, cosí come l'assoluta mancanza di romanticismo nella storia d'amore tra Brett e Hap. Un giorno, probabilmente mi rileggeró tutta la serie, ma nel frattempo mi godo ancora il retrogusto piacevole di questo ultimo romanzo.

[Michael Fredette]

Sugar on the Bones, Joe R. Lansdale [Little, Brown/ Mulholland Books, 2024].

Hap, Leonard, and Hap’s wife Brett investigate the murder of a prospective client and the client’s daughter’s disappearance, in a case involving double identities, financial malfeasance, police corruption, and a black market organ harvesting scheme. As always, Lansdale provides swift, violent action leavened by outrageous humor.

***
Joe R. Lansdale is the “champion Mojo storyteller” and “the last surviving Splatterpunk, sanctified in the blood of the walking Western dead.” (The Austin Chronicle) Most recently, Lansdale is the author of In the Mad Mountains, a collection of Weird Fiction drawn from Lovecraftian mythos. Lansdale is also a contributor to The End of the World as We Know It, an anthology inspired by Stephen King’s The Stand, coming in Summer 2025.

Notes: Sugar on the Bones was purchased via mail order from Yardstick Books in Algoma, WI.

[Justin Partridge]

“All we did tonight was lie down in the goddamn dirt,” Leonard said.

“I’m okay with that,” I said.

Life in LaBorde County is changing for Hap and Leonard and all it takes is a little organ theft and multinational assassins to bring it into focus!

But seriously, this is a fun time. All of these so far have been a fun time and while I didn’t have the most context for all the side characters that end up rounding out the cast here, it’s still a pretty great time with the boys and Brett as they try to right a few of their own personal wrongs amid this entry’s main story.

I would say though, surely you would need to get a bit into these before tackling this one. Not only with the tone but also with just how breezy and staccato some of the chapters end up being. I could see that turning off a newcomer.

[Sylvia McIvers]

Story started out OK - someone wants to hire detectives, and their house burns down that very night.

There's a clue in the charred bones found, I figured it out long before our detectives.
The mystery of the beauteous girlfriend, didn't see that one coming. Didn't find it believable, though.
The dialogue was... meh. Not actually bad, but not interesting.

Oh well.
This is my summer for new authors.
Win some, lose some.

[Brennan LaFaro]

Joe Lansdale writing Hap & Leonard, it's like pulling the car into the driveway after time away from home. A sigh of relief and warm fuzzy touch of familiarity. Simply put, if you've enjoyed previous entries, you'll enjoy this one. If you've yet to dive in, Sugar on the Bones is as good a place as any, though my reader's heart demands you at least try to pick up Savage Season. Lansdale's ability to mature and age these character gracefully without sacrificing an ounce of entertaining should be studied, all these volumes in and never a dull moment. Sugar on the Bones boasts the anticipated twists, turns, and unusual detours with enough fart jokes to draw plenty of hearty laughs, enough violence to draw a wince and grimace or two, and some stakeouts with old friends. Add this one to your pile.

[Lyle Boylen]

Another great instalment in the Hap and Leonard series. Based on the story, could this be the last one.

[Jim]

Certainly the funniest of the H&L series thus far. The language Lansdale gives his characters is damn near perfect.

[Arty A]

This is the 30th book I've read so far in 2026!! It was great! Must read! Really good characters. There is an old pervert named Al. He was cool. Then there is a young female assassin named Vanilla Ride and another vigilante type of guy called Veil. Alot of characters. It's like the Hap & Leonard version of the Avengers!

[incipit mania]

Incipit
Potrei cominciare questa storia nel bel mezzo del momento piú serio, perché è stato brutto forte, molto peggio di quanto ci aspettavamo, e ci è piombato addosso da un’angolazione che quasi sfidava la geometria.
Continua su IncipitMania

[Maurizio Ferrero]

Ormai ero rassegnato all'idea che il buon vecchio Joe avesse finito le idee e stesse scrivendo per inerzia, portando avanti fino allo stremo due personaggi iconici come Hap e Leonard invece di concedergli la meritata pensione.
Con Zucchero sulle Ossa mi sono dovuto ricredere, perché dopo un paio di episodi mediocri, il texano torna a regalarci una storia che no, non è al livello delle loro primissime indagini, ma appare come una ventata d'aria fresca che ci fa capire che sì, ogni tanto il vecchio Joe sta iniziando a mollare il tiro, ma sotto sotto è sempre lo stesso di una volta.
Letto in due giorni, con la mia compagna che ogni tanto alzava la testa e mi guardava stranita quando mi facevo qualche sghignazzata dopo una battutina caustica (Jim Bob Luke mi fa sempre scassare).

[Irene Murković]

Un'eccellente ritorno dopo una lunga assenza, della coppia di eroi (e la loro formidabile claque) che non avresti mai pensato di amare cosi tanto, invece torni sempre li estasiato da questo Far West moderno, sperando che ce ne sia ancora ancora ancora....

Lansdale è a mio avviso un autore geniale, di quelli che piu di altri hanno creato un ambientazione reale, ma talmente reale che sembra di essere realmente li, a fianco di Hap e Leonard, mentre incappano nella prossima avventura. Pure LOVE.

[Bjørn Sørlien]

"But I accept there are others that find it important. I think the bottom line is how well we treat people. You and I both try. Leonard tries sometimes. Of course, to be fair, sometimes we shoot people.”

Fun, brutal, and fast paced. And like always with Lansdale, there's heart underneath

[Jason Bovberg]

Sugar on the Bones is a fun and hilarious Hap & Leonard adventure. There’s an overriding sense of simply enjoying the ride, of well-crafted characters—major and minor—chatting and finding their well-worn grooves. Whereas earlier adventures might have had deeper senses of danger, rougher times, and more eye-opening violence, Sugar on the Bones has that ephemeral notion of good guys shootin’ the shit and of savory adventures among old friends. There’s no getting around the sense that this book feels like a later one in a series, and for this reader anyway, there’s gratitude in that.