How to Have a Happy Birthday: Create Meaning, Fulfillment and Joy on Your Special Day

by Tamar Hurwitz-Fleming

"Recommended self-help reading for those seeking a happy birthday and a happy life." – Kirkus Reviews


Your birthday is a major holiday. Discover a new approach to transform your experience into one that is more satisfying and delightful.Birthdays are supposed to be happy, yet sometimes aren’t. Or they’re festive—but not fulfilling. Whether you enjoy celebrating your birthdays or not, this book is for you.

With a wise and refreshing voice, author and birthday aficionado Tamar Hurwitz-Fleming understands the complex emotions that can arise as the day approaches and believes in the power of the day to uplift and honor your unique existence. Now she’s here to share thoughtful ways to embrace the moment and ignite the spark.

In How to Have a Happy Birthday, you’ll

• A comprehensive guide to everything you need to know about becoming “birthday-positive”
• Thoughtful questions to help you identify and ease fears, so you’ll discover what will bring you joy on your special day
• Anecdotes, creative plans, and new ideas to help you find the magic and shape your day
• What to do—and NOT to do—to transform this celebration into pure enjoyment
• Tips to dodge the birthday blues, a personal workbook, and much more!

How to Have a Happy Birthday is a thorough dive into a day that is often glossed over or trivially observed. Whether you are 18 or 80, if you like heartfelt advice, straight-forward information, and refreshing points of view, then you’ll love this book.

Read How to Have a Happy Birthday and receive the true gifts your birthday promises!

(P.S. This book makes a great birthday present!)

Genres: Nonfiction, Self Help

148 pages, Kindle Edition

Published January 9, 2024

Reviews

[SusanTalksBooks · Rating 5 out of 5]

*** 9/16/25 *** Was this book written specifically for me lol!?! I'm not sure how, but the universe connected author Tamar Hurwitz-Fleming with me, allowing me to review her wonderful "How to Have a Happy Birthday" book and accompanying workbook. I am a person who struggles a bit with celebrating my (pre-Christmas) birthday in the hubbub of holiday preparations, and feeling silly about making a big deal out of this day when there is a such a major holiday just around the corner (really 2 if you count New Years). Yes, I've minimized it, sabotaged it, deflected making plans for it, and in general not paid it appropriate attention, as many adult women sometimes do. Until now.

Tamar writes of using your birthday as your own personal New Years Day - a day of restart, affirmation, positivity, goal-setting, and self-care - to create joy and fulfillment. The book provides concrete ways to plan your special day, ideas for celebration, how to mitigate "issues" we all have at times, and peppers in many short "case studies" that I enjoyed reading.

She is not only a really strong writer, she has managed to put together a really refined and motivational self-development book that is very enjoyable to read. And she did this all after age 50 - kudos! 5-stars

*** 5/29/25 *** I was thrilled to be contacted by the author to read and review her new release book and accompanying workbook, as I am a person who has a pre-Christmas birthday (I came home from the hospital in a Santa suit on Christmas Eve!), and I've had my struggles with how to celebrate my birthday during a super busy time of year for everyone. I look forward to reading this and will do a full review shortly.

[Erin Clemence · Rating 4 out of 5]

Special thanks to the publisher for a free, physical copy of this novel received in exchange for an honest review.

As children, most of us looked forward to our birthdays, from the parties to the gifts to just generally being made to feel special and to honour our “special” day, but as we age, birthdays become less and less important. Tamar Hurwitz-Fleming’s book, “How to Have a Happy Birthday: Create Meaning, Fulfillment and Joy on Your Special Day” talks about why we should still celebrate our birthday regardless of our age or stage, and just how to go about celebrating it in positive, beneficial ways.

The book itself is a very short read, with digestible chapters filled with tips and anecdotes. “Birthday” is broken down into nine sections and it covers everything from why birthdays are important, why we sabotage our birthdays, to planning for your birthday (and the birthdays of those we love) and how to celebrate a birthday of those we have lost, or whom we are currently grieving for.

“Birthday” is a novel concept and is, obviously, relevant to everyone, since having a birthday is a thing you can guarantee every human being on Earth has, whether they celebrate it or not. Now, specifically, Hurwitz-Fleming’s topics are focused on things like; surrounding yourself with items that bring you joy, reaching out to those around you and embracing their wishes and support and honouring your physical and emotional self. Although none of these topics are new to any self-help reader, Hurwitz-Fleming makes them unique by tying them into birthdays and how we can celebrate the very fact that we are alive.

“Birthday” is the first book by this author and comes from a personal place, as the author struggled for years to find the joy that comes with one’s birthday. Hurwitz-Fleming definitely has a passion for sharing her knowledge with others, and her short book prevents readers from getting lost in massive amounts of unnecessary or unrelated information, which can be the downfall of some self-help books.

To top it off, “Birthday” comes with space at the end of the novel (as well as a separate workbook in some cases), which allows readers to closely examine their own personal beliefs around birthdays, helping the book leave a longer-lasting imprint.

[Bianca · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received an ARC of this book and it was just what I needed. Being middle-aged, I’ve long known that birthdays can be disappointing and tinged with sadness.

But while I’d worked out that if I wanted to have a good birthday, I had to take ownership of the day and my experience, this important lesson bears repeating, and elaborating on, which is exactly what this book did.

I loved the author’s thoughts on why birthdays matter, how to create the day you want, the do’s and don’t s on birthdays and how to feel comfortable celebrating yourself.

After finishing this book and the insightful workbook at the end, I feel inspired to view my birthday differently (it’s never too late), and to feel confident in why I’m celebrating. I’m now looking forward to many happier birthdays ahead. 🎉

[Marie (IfCatsCouldRead) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was able to read the first few chapters before my birthday, and it gave me the idea to ask people to help me celebrate rather than wait for others to make my birthday special.
Tamar brings up many emotions people may feel around their birthday and warns of self-sabotaging the event. She includes many real-life scenarios as well as workbook questions to help each reader tailor their wishes into a birthday celebration. She mentions having rituals and building positive energy, and finding deeper meaning in ones birth date. Parts were a bit "out there" for me, but others may find this as just what they need.
Overall, I'm glad I read it. I received this book for free and was encouraged to share a review.

[Laurie Burns · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well today is one month until my 42nd birthday(9:9) so I figured it was a good time to finish this one up in preparation for my upcoming birthday. As a woman, I feel like it’s been ingrained into us to feel negative about getting older, our bodies judged by wrinkles and sagging skin and our ability to procreate. F that! I want to embrace where I am and how hard I have worked to get here. I have never felt more comfy in who I am! And this book reminds us to celebrate ourselves and make a clear path in our mind on what we want from this life. Really, this is a book about taking back the power you have to create your own birthday joy. I think a lot of people have big feelings around birthdays- they can be a reflection on life in general and sometimes set you up to be disappointed. But Fleming tackles many ways that you can take the joy back and even in some small ways, set yourself up for better feelings around your birthday and a better day. I admit this book was more than I first thought I would get out of it.

[Donna]

In the midst of my short-reads marathon (yes, more world news avoidance), I was contacted by a book publicity service offering me a copy of How to Have a Happy Birthday by Tamar Hurwitz-Fleming. The timing was perfect, and the book’s messages resonated.
In a nutshell, Tamar encourages us to take ownership of our birthdays and celebrate them as our personal new year. Rather than relying on others to make the day special, she urges us to plan intentionally for how we want our birthday and new year to unfold.
She highlights the importance of rituals and celebrations, advocating that our birthdays are when we are most spiritually aligned. She encourages self-reflection, letting go of limiting beliefs, and embracing aging as a gift rather than a loss.
The ARC copy I received included a workbook with thought-provoking questions designed to help readers explore any discomfort or fears around birthdays or aging. It also offered guidance on focusing our time and energy to maximize fulfillment.
Tamar has packed much into this book and workbook. Her passion radiates off of each page.
If you'd like to explore these themes further or simply get the most out of your upcoming birthdays, How to Have a Happy Birthday is available in paperback, digital, and audio formats from AbeBooks, Alibris, Audible, Amazon, and Kobo.

[Beth Ann · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was gifted a copy of this book by the author for review purposes and since I had a birthday approaching I thought it would be a good book to read.

The author relates how some people simply do not have a healthy relationship with the idea of their birthday. She goes on to offer a series of ways to claim your birthday and make it meaningful and a happy occasion instead of one that does not meet expectations.

The author also included a workbook and while I did not actually use it, it appeared to have some interesting questions that would encourage the reader to take a deeper look at their thoughts about their own birthday.

The author also included some thoughts about spiritual ways to celebrate and even though I don’t think her belief system is quite the same as mine I recognize that everyone has a different experience than me—— we are all unique and she was trying to be inclusive.

I probably never would have read this book had I not been offered it for review and while I did not find anything in it that would really enhance my own birthday situation I am sure others would find something helpful. I did take to heart the “eat cake” chapter!

Thanks to the author for a free copy for review!

[Kerry Mulhern · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book I didn’t know I needed!
This little book showed up as a gift and honestly, I thought it was just a cute birthday book at first. But a few pages in, I realized it was so much more.

I’ve always brushed off making a big deal about my birthday, but reading How to Have a Happy Birthday helped me see something deeper: maybe I wasn’t avoiding the celebration itself… maybe I was avoiding the feelings underneath it.

Turns out, birthdays aren’t just about cake and candles. They’re about acknowledgment, reflection, and letting yourself feel seen. This book cracked something open for me and now I'm so looking forward to next year and how I’ll celebrate in a way that is truly me.

If your birthday ever feels complicated, this one’s for you!

[Kellyann Rohr · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It’s about more than just birthdays, it’s about connecting with your soul and celebrating who you are. I had fallen into a rut thinking that as an adult my birthday was just another day but that’s not true. I’ve come to realize that regardless of age, our birthday is a special day and that we are worth celebrating!
Loved the workbook too! I think this would make a great read for a book club.

[Lori · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is thoughtful and joyful and a great reminder that we all need to celebrate ourselves on our birthdays!

[Michelle Ardillo · Rating 4 out of 5]

See my full review at http://michelleardillo.com/2025/03/31...

[EstephBooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

You might wonder why one would need to read a book on how to have a happy birthday or if the book is somehow boring or useless.

The truth is that a big chunck of people don't really know how to make the most out of their birthdays and some others don't even think about celebrating just because the people around them are not up to it.

This book teaches us that our birthdays depend entirely on us. We can make them memorable. We can make them a day to remember. And we need to cherish ourselves.

It's full of tips and different rituals that would help us enjoy our birthdays to the fullest.

For me, the only downside was the little stories at the beginning. At some point, I lost interest as they seemed repetitive.

Other than that, I loved the advice, loved the rituals, loved the workbook and insightful questions at the end, and absolutely adored that the author took the time to put this book together. I've never seen/read about someone so devoted to the most important holiday of all.


I received a free copy of this book through a Goodreads giveaway, and I'm leaving this review honestly and voluntarily.

[Sue · Rating 5 out of 5]

Do we need a book on how to have a happy birthday? Judging by the number of people who come away from their big day disappointed, we do. Tamar Hurwitz-Fleming has provided a guide. Step by step, she takes us through the reasons why birthdays are worth celebrating, how we can ruin them for ourselves, and how to create a birthday that truly gives us joy. The language is clear, the tone optimistic, and the suggestions are totally doable. The book comes with a workbook in which to brainstorm about our birthday desires and consider the intangible gifts we have already received. It’s a good deal, especially for those of us who live alone and can’t depend on family to celebrate us the way we’d like to be celebrated.

[Jenny Lisk · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recently had my birthday and decided to read this book ahead of time to see whether I might do something differently this year. I loved the author's suggestion that your birthday is your "personal New Year." That feels right to me, and like an idea I can get behind. Because I read this book before my birthday I was far more intentional about it than I think I ever have been. I recommend it for anyone wanting to have a "happier" birthday - whether that is "happier" instead of sad/disappointing/whatever, or "happier" instead of decent/good enough/just fine. It also makes a good gift, especially for those hard-to-buy-for people in your life.

[Rita · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was given a free copy of "How to Have a Happy Birthday Workbook Insight, Inspiration, and Ideas for Creating Meaning, Fulfillment, and Joy on Your Special Day", via LibraryThing. I wasn't sure what to expect but I am glad I had the opportunity to read and use. The activities make you think and learn more about yourself. This is an easy, get to know yourself workbook. It is straight forward and easy to use. Warning, to get the most out of it, you need to think about your answers and write them down.

[Patricia Muir · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recommend Tamar's book for women who appreciate birthdays in all phases of life. While preparing to meet Tamar, I read her book, focusing on chapters that immediately resonated with me. I came across a beautiful idea: using the birthday of a loved one who has passed as a way to connect with their spirit. With a little ritual and an open heart, it’s possible to feel an energetic connection between this world and theirs. July 27th is my Mom's birthday. I think of her often and miss her so much. I’m planning a special way to honour and connect with her.

[Jayne Dalton · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was delightfully surprised with how much I enjoyed this book. I only ever had 1 birthday party growing up as my mother died when I was little - so my birthday was never important. Tamar has a unique ability to open your mind set and see the richness and spirituality in celebrating your special day mindfully. I’ve realised how much I’ve missed out on not treating my birthday as a special day. I am looking forward to January when I am going to approach my birthday in a totally different way.
An educational and eye opening book that lifts you up. I loved it’

[SD · Rating 3 out of 5]

There is one day out of the year that is truly "your day" and that is the day of your birth. This book delves into all the ways you can celebrate and some of the reasons you may not. While some of the suggestions may not be for you, it does drive home the notion that you should take time for yourself, indulge in a bit of self-care. Make it a day where you create special memories in whatever way you want and don't put pressure on yourself to make it perfect.

Happy Reading!

[Jenna · Rating 1 out of 5]

I am not one to enjoy my birthday, and I was hoping to find a deeper look at why this might be. Instead, this was a book full of suggestions like psychic readings, tarot cards, and, frankly, very self-centered thinking. I would not say this is a book for someone with traditional Godly views of selfhood.

[Meryl Arnett · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book offers such helpful ideas and suggestions for bringing joy to birthdays again. It felt a little hard to celebrate with the current state of the world, and I found several ideas that felt appropriate, uplifting and doable. So glad I picked this book up, and I plan to revisit again next year.

[Ashley Dauby · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this quick read probably more than i expected to. I did read this about a week and a half before my actual birthday as well. This book just makes you remember and think about how your birthday should always be celebrated! A nice reminder of birthday celebrations and how people typically are happy and want to celebrate you as well!

I won this book through a goodreads giveaway - thank you for choosing me!