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Disappointing Affirmations
From the wildly popular Instagram account, Disappointing Affirmations hilariously counters the culture of relentless toxic positivity with a realistic take on a disappointing world where failure is always an option, but that’s okay.
Pairing lovely vacation photos taken by the author himself with sayings that are amusingly self-critical, encouraging, disillusioned, or all three at once, Tarnowski points to feelings commonly unacknowledged or hidden and spotlights them with humor, wit, and empathy. You can do it! But you probably won’t. But Be kind to yourself, asshole. Transforming and re-envisioning the material for print while adding tons of new work, this is the funny-because-it’s-true, sneaky self-help gift book for anyone who isn’t happy all the time and doesn’t feel seen in the whole “positive mental attitude” culture. Unfollow your dreams!
IT REALLY IS OKAY TO NOT BE People say, “It’s okay to not be okay,” but then it feels like they need you to be okay. This subversively funny book is the perfect way to remind ourselves, or anyone who needs it, that it's better to deal with our feelings honestly than fall into the “positive vibes only” self-help trap.
COMEDY FOR A NEW Wellness has been slowly taking a darker turn in popular culture, and comedy is no exception. From Inside by Bo Burnham to the absurdity of TV giant Succession, audiences are drawn to media that embraces discomfort rather than drowning it out. Disappointing Affirmations may not look very comforting, but not all self-care comes in the form of warm hugs and sunrise yoga.
FOR HUMOR BOOK Seeking a gift for the anti-optimist in your life? This one fits the bill for fans of satirical doom classics and self-help antidotes such as All My Friends Are Dead, Am I Overthinking This?, the Worst Case Scenario series, and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.
THERE’S MORE: See also the Disappointing AffirmationsPencils and Disappointing Affirmations: 30 Postcards set. You won’t be disappointed.
Pairing lovely vacation photos taken by the author himself with sayings that are amusingly self-critical, encouraging, disillusioned, or all three at once, Tarnowski points to feelings commonly unacknowledged or hidden and spotlights them with humor, wit, and empathy. You can do it! But you probably won’t. But Be kind to yourself, asshole. Transforming and re-envisioning the material for print while adding tons of new work, this is the funny-because-it’s-true, sneaky self-help gift book for anyone who isn’t happy all the time and doesn’t feel seen in the whole “positive mental attitude” culture. Unfollow your dreams!
IT REALLY IS OKAY TO NOT BE People say, “It’s okay to not be okay,” but then it feels like they need you to be okay. This subversively funny book is the perfect way to remind ourselves, or anyone who needs it, that it's better to deal with our feelings honestly than fall into the “positive vibes only” self-help trap.
COMEDY FOR A NEW Wellness has been slowly taking a darker turn in popular culture, and comedy is no exception. From Inside by Bo Burnham to the absurdity of TV giant Succession, audiences are drawn to media that embraces discomfort rather than drowning it out. Disappointing Affirmations may not look very comforting, but not all self-care comes in the form of warm hugs and sunrise yoga.
FOR HUMOR BOOK Seeking a gift for the anti-optimist in your life? This one fits the bill for fans of satirical doom classics and self-help antidotes such as All My Friends Are Dead, Am I Overthinking This?, the Worst Case Scenario series, and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck.
THERE’S MORE: See also the Disappointing AffirmationsPencils and Disappointing Affirmations: 30 Postcards set. You won’t be disappointed.
96 pages, Hardcover
Published March 12, 2024
5 people are currently reading
927 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 136 reviews
March 15, 2024
Disappointing Affirmations – Dave Tarnowski – 2024 –
Encouraged by psychologists, religious advisors, counselors/therapists and writers of self-help literature the practice of using Affirmations became a socially acceptable and solid form of therapy culture. Most were advised to write affirmations down, and tape to bathroom mirrors to car steering wheels where these words of wisdom can be seen. More recently, Mental health professionals have questioned the practice: “Do Affirmations really work?” and “Are Affirmations that helpful, or just as easily forgotten?”
Novelist Dave Tarnowski, has reached huge success with over 2.2 million Instagram followers and has taken the practice of use of Affirmations to a whole new level. The slim tidy volume of affirmations featuring nature and natural elements is sleek, colorful, humorous, and helpful. With the book, it isn’t necessary for readers to tape affirmations to objects around their homes. As the cover jacket unfolds into an impressive poster, readers are advised: “Have a panic attack. You’ve earned it!” and realistically, “You can do it!” (but probably won’t). Tarnowski, now divorced, shared his own diagnosis with bipolar disorder and ADHD, and has faced crushing depression and disappointments. His book is a reminder for readers not to take ourselves so seriously, and laughter can (usually) be the best medicine ever! Bravo! With Thanks to NetGalley for the DDC for the purpose of review.
Encouraged by psychologists, religious advisors, counselors/therapists and writers of self-help literature the practice of using Affirmations became a socially acceptable and solid form of therapy culture. Most were advised to write affirmations down, and tape to bathroom mirrors to car steering wheels where these words of wisdom can be seen. More recently, Mental health professionals have questioned the practice: “Do Affirmations really work?” and “Are Affirmations that helpful, or just as easily forgotten?”
Novelist Dave Tarnowski, has reached huge success with over 2.2 million Instagram followers and has taken the practice of use of Affirmations to a whole new level. The slim tidy volume of affirmations featuring nature and natural elements is sleek, colorful, humorous, and helpful. With the book, it isn’t necessary for readers to tape affirmations to objects around their homes. As the cover jacket unfolds into an impressive poster, readers are advised: “Have a panic attack. You’ve earned it!” and realistically, “You can do it!” (but probably won’t). Tarnowski, now divorced, shared his own diagnosis with bipolar disorder and ADHD, and has faced crushing depression and disappointments. His book is a reminder for readers not to take ourselves so seriously, and laughter can (usually) be the best medicine ever! Bravo! With Thanks to NetGalley for the DDC for the purpose of review.
April 3, 2025
Realism at its finest (and bluntest)!
June 1, 2024
If I could have one book that best describes me, I think this is. I found it guys!! I love this so much. Everything nowadays is spread positivity and love. But how do we really feel? This book says it all. It’s hilarious and I’ve never connected with something so much before. It’s short, honest and doesn’t hold back. 5 laugh out loud stars
March 19, 2024
I received a copy of this book for free from the publisher (Chronicle Books) for promotional purposes.
What a gem of a book!
I am personally not a fan of positive affirmations. They’re just not my thing and I find them overly optimistic. Disappointing affirmations are more up my alley so I ended up loving this book.
The book starts with a short intro that gives some background into how the book came about. Knowing how/why the book was written made me appreciate it even more.
The affirmations were all so hilarious and spot on. Some of my favorites were:
-“It’s not imposter syndrome. You really do suck at everything.”
-“Stop overthinking. You are the only one who cares.”
-“Take a moment to be grateful for all that you have. Okay, now back to wishing everything was different.”
-“My entire vibe is I don’t want to.”
The background photos are also gorgeous and were taken by the author. I loved the juxtaposition of the serene pictures with the disappointing affirmations.
This book would make a great gift, but do keep in mind there is some foul language.
Lastly, the book jacket turns into a poster that says, “Have a panic attack. You’ve earned it.” I thought that was a fun and creative touch.
Overall, this was an entertaining and relatable read!
What a gem of a book!
I am personally not a fan of positive affirmations. They’re just not my thing and I find them overly optimistic. Disappointing affirmations are more up my alley so I ended up loving this book.
The book starts with a short intro that gives some background into how the book came about. Knowing how/why the book was written made me appreciate it even more.
The affirmations were all so hilarious and spot on. Some of my favorites were:
-“It’s not imposter syndrome. You really do suck at everything.”
-“Stop overthinking. You are the only one who cares.”
-“Take a moment to be grateful for all that you have. Okay, now back to wishing everything was different.”
-“My entire vibe is I don’t want to.”
The background photos are also gorgeous and were taken by the author. I loved the juxtaposition of the serene pictures with the disappointing affirmations.
This book would make a great gift, but do keep in mind there is some foul language.
Lastly, the book jacket turns into a poster that says, “Have a panic attack. You’ve earned it.” I thought that was a fun and creative touch.
Overall, this was an entertaining and relatable read!
April 13, 2024
I enjoyed this so much that I am now following the author on Instagram for more. If the title didn’t give it away, this book is filled with funny non-positivity. I laughed as I read it (it’s a very quick read) and even though it’s not overly positive, it gave me a positive outlook because I felt like I was seen… And maybe I could do something with my life, but after a nap and a wasted day lol...
I’ll be picking up a copy of this for myself when it’s published and may give it to a few friends.
*Provided a DRC (digital review copy) from the publisher for review. All opinions are my own.
I’ll be picking up a copy of this for myself when it’s published and may give it to a few friends.
*Provided a DRC (digital review copy) from the publisher for review. All opinions are my own.
October 24, 2024
Laughed so hard I cried, then bought a few copies as presents
November 10, 2024
As a long time devotee of Louise Hay, I’m actually a great believer in affirmations. But I recognize that they can sometimes be a little wacky. This book is hilarious and had me laughing out loud throughout. The background photographs (taken by the author) on each page reminded me of those inspirational posters that people used to hang in their offices in the 1980’s. You know the ones that had a nature photograph and then a single word like Imagine or Success. That just added to the humor for me. So just remember…”It’s okay if you aren’t where you wanted to be by now. Your goals have always been unrealistic.”
May 12, 2024
This book is so funny! It’s got some gold nuggets of hard truth. I especially loved the acknowledgements and author bio. I picked this book up on a whim and am glad that I did!
May 8, 2025
10/5⭐
Taip blogai, kad net gerai.
Pusė apie mane. Kita pusė apie įsivaizduojamą mane. Kai daviau paskaityt vyrui, pasakė, kad čia ne apie mane, o apie jį.
Taip blogai, kad net gerai.
Pusė apie mane. Kita pusė apie įsivaizduojamą mane. Kai daviau paskaityt vyrui, pasakė, kad čia ne apie mane, o apie jį.
June 18, 2024
This can be read very quickly and the disappointing affirmations are hilarious. The author's introduction explains that he has bipolar disorder and ADHD and he came up with a way to make light of negative thoughts. He writes, "Everyone wants you to be okay. Many don't care if you actually are," adding that many people are uncomfortable with hard feelings. As I was reading these, and laughing, I thought of how refreshing this book would be for someone in the hospital or anyone who others have worried about or pitied. I also enjoyed the beautiful nature scenes throughout the book.
January 23, 2024
I loved Disappointing Affirmations. I follow the Instagram page and it’s always nice to be able to see a collection of “posts” in a compilation. I recognized some of the affirmations from his Insta, but I feel a lot of it was new material. The photographs seemed to match the affirmations in mood, but I found myself wondering where some of the beautiful photos were taken and this information was not included. I am not sure if this will be an issue in a hard copy of the book, but I struggles with the big affirmations being written across two pages. Overall, I enjoyed the content, but if I recommended it I’d likely recommend a hard copy version.
January 18, 2024
A hilarious look at non postive affirmations on gorgeous postive landscapes. I giggled at a lot of them. I know it’s not for everyone but I personally found it hilarious!
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.
March 5, 2025
No one is coming to save you.
You are the adult.
I'm so sorry.
This book comes out the gate guns blazing 🤣
Filled with what the title clearly implies, disappointing affirmations, it doesn't let up with funny and discouraging quotes against beautiful nature scenes.
Let me just post a few of my favs:
You're doing the best that you can. Which is pretty sad.
The only person you can truly rely on is you. What a fucking nightmare.
It's not imposter syndrome. You really do suck at everything.
Have a panic attack. You've earned it.
Don't let anyone make you feel bad about yourself. That's your job. And nobody does it better.
Give yourself a break. Disassociate.
Be kind to yourself, asshole.
And a simple one:
Don't. Give up.
A quick read with great advice 😅 I totally recommend.
You are the adult.
I'm so sorry.
This book comes out the gate guns blazing 🤣
Filled with what the title clearly implies, disappointing affirmations, it doesn't let up with funny and discouraging quotes against beautiful nature scenes.
Let me just post a few of my favs:
You're doing the best that you can. Which is pretty sad.
The only person you can truly rely on is you. What a fucking nightmare.
It's not imposter syndrome. You really do suck at everything.
Have a panic attack. You've earned it.
Don't let anyone make you feel bad about yourself. That's your job. And nobody does it better.
Give yourself a break. Disassociate.
Be kind to yourself, asshole.
And a simple one:
Don't. Give up.
A quick read with great advice 😅 I totally recommend.
Read
March 13, 2024Hilarious! 😂
October 15, 2025
Absolutely loved. I must have the sticker book.
August 22, 2024
My thoughts exactly.
February 9, 2024
I was expecting this to be solely funny, but the introduction got to me. I appreciate the authors honesty and vulnerability to talk about their mental health. I can see how sharing these thoughts are not to promote “toxic positivity” but to show others the thoughts we have in our head during dark or not as “happy” times is something more can relate to than you would initially guess. The acknowledgments page thanking you and for still being here - felt this to my core; I am also thankful for you still being here. A few of my favorite quotes from this book are:
“You’re doing the best you can. Which is pretty sad.”
“The only person you can truly rely on is you. What a fucking nightmare.”
“Stop romanticizing the past. You’ve always been miserable.”
“Don’t let anyone tell you what you can’t do. That’s what you have insecurities for.”
I received this as an advanced reader copy from net galley for an honest review.
“You’re doing the best you can. Which is pretty sad.”
“The only person you can truly rely on is you. What a fucking nightmare.”
“Stop romanticizing the past. You’ve always been miserable.”
“Don’t let anyone tell you what you can’t do. That’s what you have insecurities for.”
I received this as an advanced reader copy from net galley for an honest review.
February 18, 2025
Life is not all rainbows and butterflies. It's not always what we expect it to be, and oftentimes, we end up disappointed. This is the reality we have to accept.
And that is what Dave Tarnowski tries to impart in this book—a collection of his humorous quotes that challenge the notion of toxic positivity. A book filled with picturesque photos he’s taken, riddled with quotes that parody positive affirmations. A bit too dark and pessimistic, maybe, but upon closer inspection, it's grounded in reality. While affirmations and a positive outlook are valuable, we should also acknowledge the negatives. They should not be suppressed nor buried into oblivion. Affirmations should be a mix of both and maybe, by accepting that darkness is when we can find the light. That life isn’t about forcing happiness—it’s about finding meaning in both the highs and the lows.
And that is what Dave Tarnowski tries to impart in this book—a collection of his humorous quotes that challenge the notion of toxic positivity. A book filled with picturesque photos he’s taken, riddled with quotes that parody positive affirmations. A bit too dark and pessimistic, maybe, but upon closer inspection, it's grounded in reality. While affirmations and a positive outlook are valuable, we should also acknowledge the negatives. They should not be suppressed nor buried into oblivion. Affirmations should be a mix of both and maybe, by accepting that darkness is when we can find the light. That life isn’t about forcing happiness—it’s about finding meaning in both the highs and the lows.
February 9, 2024
Being a fan of this author from his Instagram account, I was so excited to see his DISAPPOINTING AFFIRMATIONS as a book! A book that will make you laugh at loud and at the same time not feel so alone when it comes to negative thoughts one may have about themselves and life. I love and admire how the author can take mental health and put a spin on it while shining light on a dark subject. Everyone needs a break once in a while from their stress, life, expectations, pressures, and this book will do just the trick. Looking forward to getting my own hard copy and others to give as great gifts!
Much gratitude to Chronicle Books and NetGalley for the arc in exchange for my honest review.
Much gratitude to Chronicle Books and NetGalley for the arc in exchange for my honest review.
February 10, 2024
Disappointing Affirmations by Dave Tarnowski did not disappoint (haha).
It’s witty, funny, honest and introspective.
Like the book description says “IT REALLY IS OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY: People say, “It’s okay to not be okay,” but then it feels like they need you to be okay. This subversively funny book is the perfect way to remind ourselves, or anyone who needs it, that it’s better to deal with our feelings honestly than fall into the “positive vibes only” self-help trap.”
As someone who deals with mental health issues, positive affirmations can be tiring and honestly annoying. Sometimes I want the real grit and honest truth to push me. These affirmations do but in a humorous and comforting way.
Quick easy read. Recommend buying/getting it to have on hand when you just need to push.
It’s witty, funny, honest and introspective.
Like the book description says “IT REALLY IS OKAY TO NOT BE OKAY: People say, “It’s okay to not be okay,” but then it feels like they need you to be okay. This subversively funny book is the perfect way to remind ourselves, or anyone who needs it, that it’s better to deal with our feelings honestly than fall into the “positive vibes only” self-help trap.”
As someone who deals with mental health issues, positive affirmations can be tiring and honestly annoying. Sometimes I want the real grit and honest truth to push me. These affirmations do but in a humorous and comforting way.
Quick easy read. Recommend buying/getting it to have on hand when you just need to push.
March 16, 2024
I have followed Dave on social media for quite some time and get the giggles from his “affirming” messages all the time. So to now have his book that I can flip to a random affirmation in my hot little hand whenever I want makes me so happy. I appreciate how witty he is and that he says what we’re all feeling but don’t know how to verbalize. I hope this man becomes a millionaire many times over for this gift he’s made for the world!
March 15, 2024
Disappointing affirmations by Dave Tarnowski is my kind of book. From the hilarious to the thought provoking with self defamation to negatively empowering statements and even the brutally honest. it is a fast but very entertaining read. If you need a little put me down and brutal honesty in your life you should definitely read this book. I want to thank the author and NetGalley for my free arc copy please forgive any mistakes as I am blind and dictate my review.
January 29, 2024
Disappointing Affirmations was 100% NOT disappointing! I sat and read all of it in 1 sitting. The imagery was great! It gave it an even more sarcastic feel. I have to be honest, it made me feel better about myself and ability to cope using dark humor! So glad I read these!
February 1, 2024
If you love dark humor and pretty photographs, this book is for you. It’s hilarious and speaks to my xennial adhd soul. It’s great to see one of my favorite instagrams come to life so I will be buying a copy for every single person I know.
December 19, 2024
Hilarious, as a cynic, I absolutely love it!
Best secret santa gift hahaha
Best secret santa gift hahaha
January 2, 2025
When I picked this book up I couldn’t stop laughing. A refreshing antidote to a world full of toxic positivity.
January 3, 2025
“Be kind to yourself, Asshole” - that’s it. that’s the review.
January 16, 2025
10/10. related to main character so bad
January 21, 2024
I loved this so much that I immediately went online to see how to preorder the book and looked to see if there were other mediums -- great news, you can buy the postcards too!
Positive affirmations are great but it's wonderful to see something real and know that I'm not alone.
Thanks SO MUCH to NetGalley for letting me read this
Positive affirmations are great but it's wonderful to see something real and know that I'm not alone.
Thanks SO MUCH to NetGalley for letting me read this
July 4, 2024
Truer and more insightful nuggets of wisdom, or bits of reality, you’ll be hard pressed to find. Thanks, Dave!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 136 reviews