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The Cure for the "Perfect" Life: 12 Ways to Stop Trying Harder and Start Living Braver
Do you know a woman who works her heart out but never gets anything “just right”? Who feels like she falls short of being the Christian wife, mother, daughter, and friend she longs to be?
Sound like anyone you know? Perhaps even the girl in the mirror? If so, Cheri Gregory and Kathi Lipp have good news for you.
You’re not a bad person. You’ve simply been obeying some really bad rules for far too long, rules that promised paradise but misled you into perfectionism, people-pleasing, and procrastination prison. But you don’t have to stay stuck in discouragement and resentment. Escape is possible. Rescue is waiting.
This sassy self-help guide offers been-there-felt-that, girlfriend-to-girlfriend empathy and experience that will help you As you stop trying to measure up so that others will be impressed, you’ll experience what it means to “let the peace of Christ rule in your heart.”
Sound like anyone you know? Perhaps even the girl in the mirror? If so, Cheri Gregory and Kathi Lipp have good news for you.
You’re not a bad person. You’ve simply been obeying some really bad rules for far too long, rules that promised paradise but misled you into perfectionism, people-pleasing, and procrastination prison. But you don’t have to stay stuck in discouragement and resentment. Escape is possible. Rescue is waiting.
This sassy self-help guide offers been-there-felt-that, girlfriend-to-girlfriend empathy and experience that will help you As you stop trying to measure up so that others will be impressed, you’ll experience what it means to “let the peace of Christ rule in your heart.”
- GenresNonfictionChristian
256 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 2014
17 people are currently reading
255 people want to read
About the author
Kathi Lipp
42 books340 followersKathi loves giving real help and how-tos to move people forward in every area of their lives. With humor and wisdom, Kathi offers hope paired with practical steps to live with meaning.
Kathi Lipp is the Publisher Weekly bestselling author of 17 books including Clutter Free, The Get Yourself Organized Project, The Husband Project, and Overwhelmed.
She is the host of Clutter Free Academy the Podcast, runs the Facebook group Clutter Free Academy where 8000 women (and a few brave men) learn to live free from clutter. Kathi speaks at conferences across the US.
She is featured on Focus on the Family, MOPS International, Crosswalk.com, Girlfriends in God and Proverbs 31 Ministries as well as a number of other media outlets around the country. And she’s a featured expert on clutter for Women’s World Magazine and has been named “Best of Broadcast” on Focus on the Family twice.
Kathi Lipp is the Publisher Weekly bestselling author of 17 books including Clutter Free, The Get Yourself Organized Project, The Husband Project, and Overwhelmed.
She is the host of Clutter Free Academy the Podcast, runs the Facebook group Clutter Free Academy where 8000 women (and a few brave men) learn to live free from clutter. Kathi speaks at conferences across the US.
She is featured on Focus on the Family, MOPS International, Crosswalk.com, Girlfriends in God and Proverbs 31 Ministries as well as a number of other media outlets around the country. And she’s a featured expert on clutter for Women’s World Magazine and has been named “Best of Broadcast” on Focus on the Family twice.
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Displaying 1 - 24 of 24 reviews
August 1, 2014
The authenticity and transparency of Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory is refreshing. Sharing their own struggles, they are able to help other women to overcome the lying bullies of the perfect life. This book is great for Christians and non-Christians alike who are ready to rebel against the belief that we need to have it all together. Get ready to dig deep and be you, bravely.
August 5, 2014
I used to think bullies were those little boys in elementary school who threatened you with a knuckle sandwich if you didn't hand over your lunch money. Or if you didn't do their homework. Or they would trip you in the hallway just to see you fall, so they could point at you and laugh.
I was never asked or told to do anyone's homework except my own (and I was threatened with a certain death if I didn't do it), I was usually the one doing the tripping, or at least threatening to do it for a giggle. And I almost never ate a school lunch, so I almost never had any lunch money. I rubbed my palms together in glee that I knew nothing about being bullied on the playground. I was blissfully innocent of all things bully.
The only problem with that is: It's simply not true.
I was bullied. And often the bullies were of my own making. They lived in my head and in my heart. They are, what some friends of mine call, the "P-Bullies". Just what are the "P-Bullies", I'm so glad you asked.
They are:
Perfectionism
Performancism
Procrastination
People-Pleasing.
These bullies beat us up, take our lunch money, trip us in the hallway daily. We live our lives based on lies. And we perpetuate the lies one snide comment, one well timed stage whisper at a time.
We put more time and effort into pleasing people and caring what they think about us than what God says is true about us. We fall victim to believing our lives...every aspect of our lives...must be perfect. We are not allowed to make a mistake. Ever.
We wouldn't dream of wearing two different patterns. No flowers with plaid. Two different colors of red? Not on your life. Speaking up in Bible study, yeah that's not going to happen either because "what if I'm wrong?".
We think if we just perform well enough we will succeed and no one will know our life is really in shambles. If we can keep the appearance of perfectly spinning all our plates no one will notice all the broken ones at our feet.
If we just put it off until tomorrow,or the next day, or next week, next month, next year, or until someone does it for us, we won't have to worry about failing. We'll just postpone our way out of life. Never risking. Never failing. But never succeeding either.
We won't honestly answer. We will say what we think people want to hear so we please them. If we please people, they will like us. And when they like us, we feel good about ourselves. We must be worthwhile. We have some amount of value.
Instead of believing what God says. Instead of saying, "The very God who created the universe died for me. He is preparing a place for me so I can be with Him. Because He loves me. Because He thinks I was worth." We place our value in flawed humans.
How crazy stupid is that?
I firmly believe that only when we choose to believe God's voice, His words. Only when we value His thoughts about us MORE than we value other people's will we really silence those pesky P-bullies.
If you find yourself being bullied by any one of the 4 bullies, (and if you claim to have no issues with any of them, I'm lovingly calling your bluff and I, might be, more than likely, most definitely calling you a liar) my friend Kathi Lipp has written a book with a new friend of mine, Cheri Gregory, entitled The Cure for the Perfect Life, 12 ways to stop trying harder and start living braver,
You need this book. Not just so Kathi can buy ramen noodles for next week, but so we can all put to death the old man completely. We can all silence all the bullies. We can stand together and say "NO MORE!" We can say, "Look, I'm not perfect. I'm flawed. And I want to hide that. But I'm done hiding. I'm choosing to live brave. I'm deciding to risk so you can know me, the real me. "
It's not easy. But improvement is not possible without work and risk.
Here is a excerpt of a message I sent to Kathi regarding the book:
"You're book is making me face things I'd really rather not. I'm not sure I'm okay with that yet. I am okay though with God taking the hard parts of my heart and making them soft. I do, though, find myself running to read more so I don't have to deal with some of my issues. Thinking "if I read more I don't have to face that (insert whatever word like flaw or pain) now."
(I am purposely leaving the wrong word "you're". Because I'm not perfect. And you can't bully me into thinking I'm some kind of ignoramus because it should be "Your". I know Kathi is not a book....)
This is a great book to do with a buddy, or in a small group study.
My one "issue" with the book...they talk about THL or Try Harder living. Here is what I said earlier about that:
One thing God has been pressing to the forefront of my mind this week is my "Try-Harder-Living" just won't help to offer long term results. It is only when I "Pray-Harder-Living" and do it all by leaning into Him that I will find the bullies in my life are no longer bullying me. Because frankly, girls, I have an iron will and can by sheer determination start something, power through countless obstacles (Driver anyone?) for a time. But then I get relaxed and soon it all goes back the way it was. But with Jesus strength and His enabling, we can conquer those bullies and live a life of grace. Grace extended to myself and those around me.
I cannot on my own bring about needed long-term change. I can't do it. I can fake it for the short-term, but then life happens, a bully comes calling and I'm right back where I was. But when I pray through all the bullies. When I pray for His eyes to see how I really am, when I choose to believe Christ in me, the bullies die.
So if you're interested in slaying your bullies, I have a free book for you. Unfortunately I can't give everyone who comments a book, so if you need the book, leave a comment sharing one way you plan to live braver today, and I'll put your name in a hat and on August 15, we'll draw a name out.
(I received a free copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of review. All opinions are my own.)
I was never asked or told to do anyone's homework except my own (and I was threatened with a certain death if I didn't do it), I was usually the one doing the tripping, or at least threatening to do it for a giggle. And I almost never ate a school lunch, so I almost never had any lunch money. I rubbed my palms together in glee that I knew nothing about being bullied on the playground. I was blissfully innocent of all things bully.
The only problem with that is: It's simply not true.
I was bullied. And often the bullies were of my own making. They lived in my head and in my heart. They are, what some friends of mine call, the "P-Bullies". Just what are the "P-Bullies", I'm so glad you asked.
They are:
Perfectionism
Performancism
Procrastination
People-Pleasing.
These bullies beat us up, take our lunch money, trip us in the hallway daily. We live our lives based on lies. And we perpetuate the lies one snide comment, one well timed stage whisper at a time.
We put more time and effort into pleasing people and caring what they think about us than what God says is true about us. We fall victim to believing our lives...every aspect of our lives...must be perfect. We are not allowed to make a mistake. Ever.
We wouldn't dream of wearing two different patterns. No flowers with plaid. Two different colors of red? Not on your life. Speaking up in Bible study, yeah that's not going to happen either because "what if I'm wrong?".
We think if we just perform well enough we will succeed and no one will know our life is really in shambles. If we can keep the appearance of perfectly spinning all our plates no one will notice all the broken ones at our feet.
If we just put it off until tomorrow,or the next day, or next week, next month, next year, or until someone does it for us, we won't have to worry about failing. We'll just postpone our way out of life. Never risking. Never failing. But never succeeding either.
We won't honestly answer. We will say what we think people want to hear so we please them. If we please people, they will like us. And when they like us, we feel good about ourselves. We must be worthwhile. We have some amount of value.
Instead of believing what God says. Instead of saying, "The very God who created the universe died for me. He is preparing a place for me so I can be with Him. Because He loves me. Because He thinks I was worth." We place our value in flawed humans.
How crazy stupid is that?
I firmly believe that only when we choose to believe God's voice, His words. Only when we value His thoughts about us MORE than we value other people's will we really silence those pesky P-bullies.
If you find yourself being bullied by any one of the 4 bullies, (and if you claim to have no issues with any of them, I'm lovingly calling your bluff and I, might be, more than likely, most definitely calling you a liar) my friend Kathi Lipp has written a book with a new friend of mine, Cheri Gregory, entitled The Cure for the Perfect Life, 12 ways to stop trying harder and start living braver,
You need this book. Not just so Kathi can buy ramen noodles for next week, but so we can all put to death the old man completely. We can all silence all the bullies. We can stand together and say "NO MORE!" We can say, "Look, I'm not perfect. I'm flawed. And I want to hide that. But I'm done hiding. I'm choosing to live brave. I'm deciding to risk so you can know me, the real me. "
It's not easy. But improvement is not possible without work and risk.
Here is a excerpt of a message I sent to Kathi regarding the book:
"You're book is making me face things I'd really rather not. I'm not sure I'm okay with that yet. I am okay though with God taking the hard parts of my heart and making them soft. I do, though, find myself running to read more so I don't have to deal with some of my issues. Thinking "if I read more I don't have to face that (insert whatever word like flaw or pain) now."
(I am purposely leaving the wrong word "you're". Because I'm not perfect. And you can't bully me into thinking I'm some kind of ignoramus because it should be "Your". I know Kathi is not a book....)
This is a great book to do with a buddy, or in a small group study.
My one "issue" with the book...they talk about THL or Try Harder living. Here is what I said earlier about that:
One thing God has been pressing to the forefront of my mind this week is my "Try-Harder-Living" just won't help to offer long term results. It is only when I "Pray-Harder-Living" and do it all by leaning into Him that I will find the bullies in my life are no longer bullying me. Because frankly, girls, I have an iron will and can by sheer determination start something, power through countless obstacles (Driver anyone?) for a time. But then I get relaxed and soon it all goes back the way it was. But with Jesus strength and His enabling, we can conquer those bullies and live a life of grace. Grace extended to myself and those around me.
I cannot on my own bring about needed long-term change. I can't do it. I can fake it for the short-term, but then life happens, a bully comes calling and I'm right back where I was. But when I pray through all the bullies. When I pray for His eyes to see how I really am, when I choose to believe Christ in me, the bullies die.
So if you're interested in slaying your bullies, I have a free book for you. Unfortunately I can't give everyone who comments a book, so if you need the book, leave a comment sharing one way you plan to live braver today, and I'll put your name in a hat and on August 15, we'll draw a name out.
(I received a free copy of this book from the publisher for the purpose of review. All opinions are my own.)
November 9, 2014
I used to believe I was all alone. No one could ever understand my struggles with OCD, OCPD, anxiety, fear, or depression. Sometimes they overwhelmed me to the point of complete melt down and isolation. No one could ever understand. Sometimes even I didn't understand.
But here is the thing... I'm not alone. And others DO understand--thank you Kathi and Cheri for opening my eyes! Amen and Praise the Lord!
In their book, The Cure for the "Perfect" Life, authors Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory, do a fabulous job of conveying some deep truths about the bullies and struggles of People-Pleasing, Perfectionism, Performancism, and Procrastination.
From the very beginning, Kathi and Cheri help readers understand that "Perfectionism isn't Christian. It's just crazy." From these words come challenges, questions, discussions, and life stories from other sisters struggling to rebel against "perfect" living. These lives shared, honest and real, give hope to each reader who also battles the bullies of Try-Harder Living.
For the expressive, this book is full of creative ways to fight the bullies, lots of humor, and opportunities for each reader to express their own personality through quizzes, check-lists, questions, and fun surveys. However, the expressive will be challenged to rebel against the natural tendency of people-pleasing and rather share openly, honestly, and vulnerably.
For the analytic, this book challenges readers in a deep and thoughtful way, with serious questions, measures and quizzes, and quotes, stories, or scriptures that are poetic and provoking. However, the analytical individual will also find the reassurance needed to do the right things and preserve relationships, rather than doing all things right and alienating those they love.
For the driven, this book provides the reader with a chance to achieve, successfully completing well developed sections, fill in the blanks, quizzes and lists. However, the driven and confident individual will also realize they are not alone and have positive value above and beyond their performancism and "doing."
For the amiable, this book provides an easy and relaxed read, perfect for a peaceful afternoon curled up with a cup of coffee, even if the dishes and laundry are piled high. However, the amiable will be unable to stay put, challenged by the authors to take responsibility, stop compromising, and stop procrastinating.
While I am convinced sometimes that this book was written just for me, I know that this jewel must be shared with the world. Kudos to Kathi and Cheri on a fabulous read. So... to all of you readers with "perfect" lives...Buy it. Read it. Mark it up with your favorite pink highlighter. And start living braver!
But here is the thing... I'm not alone. And others DO understand--thank you Kathi and Cheri for opening my eyes! Amen and Praise the Lord!
In their book, The Cure for the "Perfect" Life, authors Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory, do a fabulous job of conveying some deep truths about the bullies and struggles of People-Pleasing, Perfectionism, Performancism, and Procrastination.
From the very beginning, Kathi and Cheri help readers understand that "Perfectionism isn't Christian. It's just crazy." From these words come challenges, questions, discussions, and life stories from other sisters struggling to rebel against "perfect" living. These lives shared, honest and real, give hope to each reader who also battles the bullies of Try-Harder Living.
For the expressive, this book is full of creative ways to fight the bullies, lots of humor, and opportunities for each reader to express their own personality through quizzes, check-lists, questions, and fun surveys. However, the expressive will be challenged to rebel against the natural tendency of people-pleasing and rather share openly, honestly, and vulnerably.
For the analytic, this book challenges readers in a deep and thoughtful way, with serious questions, measures and quizzes, and quotes, stories, or scriptures that are poetic and provoking. However, the analytical individual will also find the reassurance needed to do the right things and preserve relationships, rather than doing all things right and alienating those they love.
For the driven, this book provides the reader with a chance to achieve, successfully completing well developed sections, fill in the blanks, quizzes and lists. However, the driven and confident individual will also realize they are not alone and have positive value above and beyond their performancism and "doing."
For the amiable, this book provides an easy and relaxed read, perfect for a peaceful afternoon curled up with a cup of coffee, even if the dishes and laundry are piled high. However, the amiable will be unable to stay put, challenged by the authors to take responsibility, stop compromising, and stop procrastinating.
While I am convinced sometimes that this book was written just for me, I know that this jewel must be shared with the world. Kudos to Kathi and Cheri on a fabulous read. So... to all of you readers with "perfect" lives...Buy it. Read it. Mark it up with your favorite pink highlighter. And start living braver!
November 7, 2014
A perfect day, perfect date, perfect gift, perfect parent, perfect child, perfect meal, perfect family. Have you ever looked up the definition of perfect? Ideal? Faultless? Best? Quintessential? Utopian? Incomparable? Flawless? Second to none? Ultimate?
Really?
The title, The Cure for the Perfect Life by Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory (Harvest House Publishers) lured me to this digital book which I borrowed from Netgalley.com, all they ask is an honest review, I can do that. Honestly, I’m going to look for a copy of this and maybe buy some as gifts because it’s a witty, authentic exploration of the horrors of the 4 horsemen of the aPocalypse: Perfectionism, People-Pleasing, Performancism aaaaaannnd…Procrastination. Stories, quizzes, and solutions to avoid stress, resentment, depression, embarrassment, and get out of the self-defeating Try Harder Life cycle. With the holiday season around the corner, no better time to understand that Perfect is only for Pinterest.
The Perfect Family? Even as a movie, wasn’t perfect despite having Kathleen Turner, Jason Ritter, and Emily Deschanel. Then again, seeing Richard Chamberlain still rockin’ the priest garb at, wait for it, over 80, wow, just wow.
So I continued my quest for perfect; I’m so far from it I’m surprised I can even spell it.
I started reading a digital copy of The Perfect Gift by Dani-Lyn Alexander (Pocket Star Books), once again from Netgalley.com. While this second chances romance was well-written, it has one of my Christmas pet peeves, people chaotically racing around like fools, arguing, tricking, whining, etc. to try to find the ‘perfect’ gift.
1. There’s no such thing as a perfect gift, just a marketing idea to convince us to shop more.
2. Seems like it’s more about the giver than the receiver.
3. Appeals to our hunting/gathering instincts – between hyping and under ordering people feel the compulsion to hunt down their prey, aka, the perfect gift.
4. What if you hurt someone racing around?
5. A gift is just right if it’s given and received from the heart, perhaps corny, but there it is.
What if the perfect gift isn’t this year’s fad?
The latest smartphone or tablet? Talking toy?
Giant stuffed animal? Vacation? TV?
Video games? A singing Santa?
What if the perfect gift is just laughter?
Smiles? Safety? Happiness?
Holding hands? A hug?
Cookies? Dancing? Singing?
Truth? Justice? Respect?
Courage? A healthy planet?
A funny movie? A long walk?
A cup of hot cocoa with tiny marshmallows?
Love? Time with family and friends?
If they’re not available, time with yourself or time giving of yourself to those in need?
What if there is no perfect, just right now?
http://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/11/06/t...
Really?
The title, The Cure for the Perfect Life by Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory (Harvest House Publishers) lured me to this digital book which I borrowed from Netgalley.com, all they ask is an honest review, I can do that. Honestly, I’m going to look for a copy of this and maybe buy some as gifts because it’s a witty, authentic exploration of the horrors of the 4 horsemen of the aPocalypse: Perfectionism, People-Pleasing, Performancism aaaaaannnd…Procrastination. Stories, quizzes, and solutions to avoid stress, resentment, depression, embarrassment, and get out of the self-defeating Try Harder Life cycle. With the holiday season around the corner, no better time to understand that Perfect is only for Pinterest.
The Perfect Family? Even as a movie, wasn’t perfect despite having Kathleen Turner, Jason Ritter, and Emily Deschanel. Then again, seeing Richard Chamberlain still rockin’ the priest garb at, wait for it, over 80, wow, just wow.
So I continued my quest for perfect; I’m so far from it I’m surprised I can even spell it.
I started reading a digital copy of The Perfect Gift by Dani-Lyn Alexander (Pocket Star Books), once again from Netgalley.com. While this second chances romance was well-written, it has one of my Christmas pet peeves, people chaotically racing around like fools, arguing, tricking, whining, etc. to try to find the ‘perfect’ gift.
1. There’s no such thing as a perfect gift, just a marketing idea to convince us to shop more.
2. Seems like it’s more about the giver than the receiver.
3. Appeals to our hunting/gathering instincts – between hyping and under ordering people feel the compulsion to hunt down their prey, aka, the perfect gift.
4. What if you hurt someone racing around?
5. A gift is just right if it’s given and received from the heart, perhaps corny, but there it is.
What if the perfect gift isn’t this year’s fad?
The latest smartphone or tablet? Talking toy?
Giant stuffed animal? Vacation? TV?
Video games? A singing Santa?
What if the perfect gift is just laughter?
Smiles? Safety? Happiness?
Holding hands? A hug?
Cookies? Dancing? Singing?
Truth? Justice? Respect?
Courage? A healthy planet?
A funny movie? A long walk?
A cup of hot cocoa with tiny marshmallows?
Love? Time with family and friends?
If they’re not available, time with yourself or time giving of yourself to those in need?
What if there is no perfect, just right now?
http://yadadarcyyada.com/2014/11/06/t...
August 25, 2014
Even the word "Perfect" sounds like fingernails on a chalkboard. Who would have thought that something so easy could be so difficult when we strive for perfection? How many times have I just given up because I can't do something perfectly?
My life hasn't been perfect since, well, never. Once I had goals to be perfect--the perfect student, the perfect daughter, the perfect wife, the perfect mother, the perfect employee. But the best laid plans are always spoiled by the unexpected--a divorce, a bad parenting decision, a missed opportunity.
Women are the worst about overcommitting. We learn to multitask. We learn the word "yes". But we never learn to say "no". Then we cry. We complain. We get anxious, depressed, frustrated.
Kathy Lipp and Cheri Gregory have made an awesome discovery--Brave Living. In their book, "The Cure for the Perfect Life", they have found a loophole in the laws of perfection--it's rebellion. It's time for women everywhere to rebel.
I gave up on perfection a long time ago. I used to live on the "when this...then that..." philosophy. When I get a better job, then.... When I find a man of husband material, then.... When I get a bigger house, then....And God is laughing because He knows He didn't create us to be perfect. He doesn't want perfection. He wants relationship. He doesn't want us to be fulfilled by worldly things. He wants us to find our fulfillment in Him and everything He has to offer.
While I still want to be a working outside the home stay-at-home mom (bring home the bacon while doing all those things stay-at-home moms do), I know that God has put me exactly where He wants me and He doesn't expect perfection.
"The Cure for the Perfect Life" is the best resource for women who try too hard to be perfect. It is a guidebook for rebelling against the culture of perfection and living brave by giving up the idea that perfection is the end all be all to life.
If you are striving for perfection and tired of failure, this is the book for you. If, however, you are perfect, please write a book letting us know how you do it. Oh, and by the way, when you buy this book, purchase a bold pink highlighter--you'll be using it a lot.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free as part of the Braver Living Rebellion blogging tour. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
My life hasn't been perfect since, well, never. Once I had goals to be perfect--the perfect student, the perfect daughter, the perfect wife, the perfect mother, the perfect employee. But the best laid plans are always spoiled by the unexpected--a divorce, a bad parenting decision, a missed opportunity.
Women are the worst about overcommitting. We learn to multitask. We learn the word "yes". But we never learn to say "no". Then we cry. We complain. We get anxious, depressed, frustrated.
Kathy Lipp and Cheri Gregory have made an awesome discovery--Brave Living. In their book, "The Cure for the Perfect Life", they have found a loophole in the laws of perfection--it's rebellion. It's time for women everywhere to rebel.
I gave up on perfection a long time ago. I used to live on the "when this...then that..." philosophy. When I get a better job, then.... When I find a man of husband material, then.... When I get a bigger house, then....And God is laughing because He knows He didn't create us to be perfect. He doesn't want perfection. He wants relationship. He doesn't want us to be fulfilled by worldly things. He wants us to find our fulfillment in Him and everything He has to offer.
While I still want to be a working outside the home stay-at-home mom (bring home the bacon while doing all those things stay-at-home moms do), I know that God has put me exactly where He wants me and He doesn't expect perfection.
"The Cure for the Perfect Life" is the best resource for women who try too hard to be perfect. It is a guidebook for rebelling against the culture of perfection and living brave by giving up the idea that perfection is the end all be all to life.
If you are striving for perfection and tired of failure, this is the book for you. If, however, you are perfect, please write a book letting us know how you do it. Oh, and by the way, when you buy this book, purchase a bold pink highlighter--you'll be using it a lot.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free as part of the Braver Living Rebellion blogging tour. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
August 19, 2014
The Cure for the "Perfect" Life by Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory is a look at the 4 "P" Bullies and 12 ways to stop trying harder and start living braver. The four "P" Bullies are: Perfectionism, People-Pleasing, Procrastination and Performancism. With humorous, yet true stories and unique candor, these ladies examine the Try Harder Living pit that many women succumb to and give hope and encouragement on how to dig out of that pit. They invite you to Braver Living Rebellion. There are four rebel personality types- Expressive, Analytic, Driver and Amiable. Each personality type reacts differently with the 4 "P" Bullies. This book is interactive and self-examining. Each chapter begins with a bully belief (ie. If I want something done right, I'm going to have to do it myself.) and a brave combat (There's more than one way to do it right.). There is a short quiz (they are all different), a story from a rebel, tiny acts of rebellion (ways to not try harder) and tips for each rebel personality type. The message they wish to convey with their readers is to leave behind the bully beliefs and embrace the freedom of choosing God's way and live in a brave new way.
I want to live the "perfect" life and the harder I try, the more frustrated I become. I wasn't made to live this way. I was made to embrace an imperfect life, but fully rely on God. As I read this book, I identified with many of the bully beliefs. Do I really live this way? I appreciate how brave the authors and contributors were to share real stories of real struggles, but also give a hope and vision for a better way of life. Do you struggle with any of the "P" Bullies? Then stop trying harder and start living braver! Get your copy today!
I want to live the "perfect" life and the harder I try, the more frustrated I become. I wasn't made to live this way. I was made to embrace an imperfect life, but fully rely on God. As I read this book, I identified with many of the bully beliefs. Do I really live this way? I appreciate how brave the authors and contributors were to share real stories of real struggles, but also give a hope and vision for a better way of life. Do you struggle with any of the "P" Bullies? Then stop trying harder and start living braver! Get your copy today!
December 29, 2014
I am a Kathi Lipp fan. Her books are consistently relevant, practical, and engaging. The two characteristics I love most about her books are her differentiation for personality types and her "next steps" ideas.
Her book includes a survey to determine if you're expressive, analytic, driving, or amiable. (I was overwhelmingly analytic.) The third part of the book is "12 Cures for the 'Perfect" Life." The subsequent chapters discuss perfectionism, time suckers, anger, and other traps that impede our goals. At the end of each chapter, Lipp and Gregory identify five ways to overcome the obstacles and how each personality type may react to them.
This book would be great to use in group settings. I wish I had finished it at the beginning of the summer. I would have used it with my MOPS leadership team. I plan to use excerpts at the January retreat.
I've read (and loved) several of Kathi Lipp's books, but I think this one and 21 Ways to Connect with Your Kids are my favorites.
Her book includes a survey to determine if you're expressive, analytic, driving, or amiable. (I was overwhelmingly analytic.) The third part of the book is "12 Cures for the 'Perfect" Life." The subsequent chapters discuss perfectionism, time suckers, anger, and other traps that impede our goals. At the end of each chapter, Lipp and Gregory identify five ways to overcome the obstacles and how each personality type may react to them.
This book would be great to use in group settings. I wish I had finished it at the beginning of the summer. I would have used it with my MOPS leadership team. I plan to use excerpts at the January retreat.
I've read (and loved) several of Kathi Lipp's books, but I think this one and 21 Ways to Connect with Your Kids are my favorites.
August 5, 2014
When I first got my copy, I quickly moved from: “Yeah, great, another Christian self-help book . . .” to “I can’t BELIEVE how these women GET me—we’ve never even met!” to “I’m so relieved to learn I’m not the ONLY one who . . . .“ to “Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, I’m free at LAST!”
As a parent of four public school students, I am acutely aware of “bully awareness.” Our children are taught early and often to recognize, report and stand up to bullies at school. Unfortunately, not all bullies are confined to the schoolyard. I say it’s high time we grownups unite against OUR bullies. In "The Cure for the Perfect Life," authors Cheri Gregory, Kathi Lipp and their brave band of rebels rally around each and every reader so that together we can defeat the “P-bullies” once and for all.
An absolute MUST-READ for every woman who’s tired of being beat-up, bullied and tyrannized by negative thoughts and words--and ready to start living bravely!
As a parent of four public school students, I am acutely aware of “bully awareness.” Our children are taught early and often to recognize, report and stand up to bullies at school. Unfortunately, not all bullies are confined to the schoolyard. I say it’s high time we grownups unite against OUR bullies. In "The Cure for the Perfect Life," authors Cheri Gregory, Kathi Lipp and their brave band of rebels rally around each and every reader so that together we can defeat the “P-bullies” once and for all.
An absolute MUST-READ for every woman who’s tired of being beat-up, bullied and tyrannized by negative thoughts and words--and ready to start living bravely!
August 4, 2014
A must read for perfectionists, people-pleasers, procrastinators, and those who think they must DO enough to BE enough.
One unique thing about this book is the quizzes. I grew up taking personality tests and other fun quizzes in magazines so this was right up my alley. Nearly every chapter had an assessment included to help readers determine how big of an issue this particular problem was.
The book began by describing the four "bullies" of perfectionism, people pleasing, procrastination, and performancism. Then, it shared 12 common misconceptions about these bullies and how to overcome them. One of my favorite quotes from the book was this: "Multitasking may work for some tasks. But multitasking kills relationships." As a self-proclaimed multitasker, this quote was life-changing.
*I received this book for free for review, but all opinions are my own.
One unique thing about this book is the quizzes. I grew up taking personality tests and other fun quizzes in magazines so this was right up my alley. Nearly every chapter had an assessment included to help readers determine how big of an issue this particular problem was.
The book began by describing the four "bullies" of perfectionism, people pleasing, procrastination, and performancism. Then, it shared 12 common misconceptions about these bullies and how to overcome them. One of my favorite quotes from the book was this: "Multitasking may work for some tasks. But multitasking kills relationships." As a self-proclaimed multitasker, this quote was life-changing.
*I received this book for free for review, but all opinions are my own.
August 14, 2014
I'm an imperfect wife and mom that has felt all alone. This book helped me learn more about who I am and gave me some great insight on how I can create a better me. I don't need to try so hard to be someone I'm not and it's okay to say no. When I picked up this book I wasn't sure I would make it all of the way through...but I did. This book won't cure anything but it will give you an amazing view of your life through taking several short quizzes. You will learn more about yourself and be on your way to approaching situations differently. You can fight off people-pleasing, perfectionism, performancism, and procrastination by taking it one step at a time. We can do all things through Him who gives us strength. Pick up one for yourself and find a bravery buddy. You'll be glad you did.
September 15, 2014
The Cure for the "Perfect" Life
12 Ways to Stop Trying Harder and Start Living Braver
Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory
Harvest House Publishers
Pub Date Aug 1 2014
This is a wonderful book that reminds us that the idea of a perfect Christian is nonsense. In fact a line early in the book puts it this way Perfectionism is not Christian it's crazy.
We are reminded that perfectionism is not the same as striving ty o do better or grow closer to Christ those are things that we should do but perfectionism takes things to a whole new level.
This book reminds us that we do not have to be perfect but it gives us tips to improve ourselves tobe better people and better Christians.
I give this book five out of five stars...
12 Ways to Stop Trying Harder and Start Living Braver
Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory
Harvest House Publishers
Pub Date Aug 1 2014
This is a wonderful book that reminds us that the idea of a perfect Christian is nonsense. In fact a line early in the book puts it this way Perfectionism is not Christian it's crazy.
We are reminded that perfectionism is not the same as striving ty o do better or grow closer to Christ those are things that we should do but perfectionism takes things to a whole new level.
This book reminds us that we do not have to be perfect but it gives us tips to improve ourselves tobe better people and better Christians.
I give this book five out of five stars...
August 1, 2014
The Cure For The “Perfect Life” written by Kathi Lipp & Cheri Gregory will take you through a journey of self-evaluation and change. On this journey you will meet four bullies named, Perfectionism, People-Pleasing, Performancism and Procrastination. After gaining a clear picture so that you can quickly identify these you will be given practical ways to trade in Try-Harder Living for Braver Living! This book would be a great Bible Study using chapter by chapter. This book is challenging, encouraging and sometimes downright hysterical as you see both authors share from personal experience how they came face to face with their bullies.
January 9, 2016
Although I am currently reading this, it's my second time reading it. A friend and I are reading it together and discussing. The book is so helpful. I think the bullies are ways the enemy gets us to focus on the wrong things. We need to keep our eyes on God and have an eternal perspective. Then we will be less likely to be motivated by fear. I don't know that I will ever stop reading this book. I'll keep going back and reminding myself of the lies the bullies are telling me and the truths I need to remember.
August 7, 2014
This is such a great book! Anyone who thinks that everthing in their life has to be done Pinterest perfect NEEDS to read this book!! I'm a Procrastinator...and i've missed out on a few things because of that little bully in my life! So if you want to see how you can defeat that and other bullies....you MUST read this book!
(I received this book free from the publisher in exchange for an honest review--all opinions are my own)
(I received this book free from the publisher in exchange for an honest review--all opinions are my own)
August 16, 2014
I was on board completely for reading this book when I heard about that Kathi Lipp and Cheri Gregory had wrote it. I admit that as I first started to read it I didn't think it would have a hugely profound message for me personally. But, it did! I think all of us find ourselves needing to escape "Try-harder Living" and if we're not there yet being aware of the pitfalls can really help as well as understanding friends and family that may have a greater struggle with "perfect".
August 21, 2014
Join the #BraverLiving challenge. This book is great. It's practical, honest, has a quiz for each chapter so the reader can self-assess, and suggestions for "tiny acts of rebellion" to fight against the bullies of Procrastination, People-Pleasing, Performancism, and Perfectionism.
I cannot recommend this book highly enough.
I cannot recommend this book highly enough.
September 22, 2014
I found some things helpful like I could relate to some things they were saying but mainly its for middle aged women with kids and a busy job. I could have got more from another self help book geared more towards young women. There are lots of quizes, I was clear on what they were all telling. I received from Netgalley for review.
August 5, 2014
Really enjoyed this book. If you're struggling to get off the perfectionism merry-go-round, this book is for you! Filled with lots of practical tips and advice, this is definitely going to be a go-to book for me for a while. This would make a great women's book study group choice.
April 27, 2015
Such a good book. The title is misleading. I certainly don't feel like I'm trying to be perfect or lead the perfect life. I think everyone (Men and women) who have families and feel pulled is many directions could benefit from reading this book and taking the quizzes. I had many "ah ha" moments.
June 13, 2015
There are many perfectionists in my family and I wanted to understand them more. I can say I understand them a little more and discovered some things about myself along the way.
February 24, 2019
Solid, spiritual advice for overworked, overwhelmed women desperate for peace and balance.
February 11, 2022
I read some of this book a couple years ago and rediscovered it on my bookshelf a couple of weeks ago. I am delighted to say that since the first reading and the second some of the wisdom has already changed my approach to pleasing people and perfectionism.
A book that really does make sense and underpinned with Scripture references one that I was happy to re-read.
Some of the references to parenting do not apply to me personally but in way of making the book a whole they certainly need to be included.
Identifying the 'bullies' that I have or continue to respond to has been very helpful - I finished the book affirmed as well as challenged.
Onwards and upwards - onwards on my journey and upwards to look upon my Lord in all things, remembering that I am 'wonderfully made'.
A book that really does make sense and underpinned with Scripture references one that I was happy to re-read.
Some of the references to parenting do not apply to me personally but in way of making the book a whole they certainly need to be included.
Identifying the 'bullies' that I have or continue to respond to has been very helpful - I finished the book affirmed as well as challenged.
Onwards and upwards - onwards on my journey and upwards to look upon my Lord in all things, remembering that I am 'wonderfully made'.
September 2, 2014
A perusal of the chapter titles in The Cure for the “Perfect” Life will touch the heart of every woman. I haven’t met a woman yet who hasn’t or isn’t still struggling with Try-Harder-Living (THL) and its four bullies. If you relate at all to dealing with perfectionism, people-pleasing, performancism, and/or procrastination, then this book has something to say to you. Cheri and Kathi go over why THL only serves to make us more miserable, not more efficient, and leaves us working like crazy to survive, instead of thriving and living in abundance. Then they proceed to offer step-by-step tools and real life examples of how to battle (with great strength) against these emotionally deadly habits. Do you want to stop treading water, barely keeping your head up? Wouldn’t you rather “learn to rest in God’s lavish unconditional love”? I know I do. And this book offers a big help on this journey. I highly recommend it without hesitation. I also recommend when you get the book you grab a bravery buddy to work with as you go! Quotes to wet your appetite: “Stop waiting until you’re fearless – you never will be – but do as much as you can with what you have. That’s brave living.” “God led me to stop sacrificing my relationships on the alter of my rightness.” “…love wins over fear any day.”
August 1, 2014
I have really enjoyed this book. It speaks to my heart and where I am at...daily. I find that I'm not alone in how I feel and other women feel the same way. I hope you will pick up this book for you AND a friend to read together because our lives were not meant to be lived alone, so bring a friend along for the ride of learning out the "Bullies" that seem to overtake everyone at one time or another and how to fight back! Be 40% BRAVE to pick up a copy and a friend to help you finish the reading of it. You won't regret it!
I have heard Kathi speak at events and she is wonderful and I have really come to enjoy Cheri and her stories too.
I have heard Kathi speak at events and she is wonderful and I have really come to enjoy Cheri and her stories too.
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