If Only: Letting Go of Regret

by Michelle Van Loon

The relationship that didn't work out. The medical decision that led to negative consequences. The career choice that didn't turn out the way it was planned.

Regret. It can imprison us in the past, deplete our present, and disable our future. A seemingly endless loop of "if onlys" wears deep ruts in the souls of those with unresolved regret as we attempt to overwrite our mistakes and poor choices.

If Only: Letting Go of Regret will help readers accept God's healing as they learn to let go of the "woulda, coulda, shoulda" thoughts in life. Find out how Christ can redeem our regrets for his glory and our good. In him, past regrets can be transformed into present wisdom and a flourishing, free future.

***2015 Christianity Today Award of Merit, Christian Living category***

Genres: Nonfiction

160 pages, Paperback

First published July 1, 2014

About the author

Michelle Van Loon’s Jewish heritage, spiritual hunger, and storyteller’s sensibilities have been informing her writing and shaping her faith journey since she came to Christ at the tail end of the Jesus Movement. She is the author of eight books, as well as numerous articles, and several full-length plays for the educational market.

She's been a church communications director, served on staff at Trinity International University, and been the U.S. Administrator for an educational ministry based in Jerusalem. She earned a graduate certificate from Northern Seminary in 2017. She's married to Bill, and is mother to three and grandmother to two.

Reviews

[Ruth Everhart · Rating 5 out of 5]

This slim volume would be a great choice for a women's group at a church. By dealing with the topic of regret it probes spiritual themes that we all deal with, such as forgiveness of self and others and acceptance of grace. Michelle's writing does not belabor a point, which makes this a gem in an otherwise crowded field. I feature an interview with Michelle on my blog on June 20, 2014. http://www.rutheverhart.com/blog/?p=5454

[Dorothy Greco · Rating 4 out of 5]

Michelle Van Loon writes, “Regret is never, ever, meant to be a destination in our lives.” For many of us, it’s not only a destination, but a way of life. As a past the middle of life wife, mom, and author/writer, Van Loon understands the power of regret. She vulnerably shares some of the choices that she has made throughout her life which have contributed to her own wrestling matches with shame. She drills down into this powerful emotion with wisdom, authority, and humor. (My favorite laugh out loud passage in the book: “We were like a two-person, twelve-step self-help group.”)

Perhaps the most winning attribute of Van Loon’s book is the warmth and utter lack of judgment. She comes off as the big sister we all wanted: empathetic, funny, and generous. There’s an unstated understanding that Yes, we all screwed up but let’s not lose anymore ground to our accuser. Let’s grab hold of God and each other and keep moving.

Insightful questions end each chapter along with an honest, accessible prayer. Buy the book. You won’t regret it.

[Mae · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book makes you think about all the regrets you have had in your life and how God view's those regrets. It also helps you to see how your regrets affect you spiritually, emotionally, and in your daily life. I thought this book was a good read and something that could help. It doesn't just talk about one kind of regret but multiple so everyone can find something in this book that they relate to on some level.
I received this book free from Good reads first reads

[Libby Buchanan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thoroughly enjoyed using If Only as a morning devotional.

That means I took my time, savored every word, and learned a lot. Did you know God can use our regrets? And that He does so in such surprising ways? I also had no idea there were so many different kinds of regret.

If Only is well worth your time.

#Libby_B4
#libbyBuchanan
Libby Buchanan

[Dusty Summerford (Reviews by Reds) · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought this book was truly inspiring!! Regrets bring nothing but sorrow so it was nice to learn ways to come to peace with it & let it go! Thank you Michelle Van Loon & Goodreads for this first reads giveaway!! It changed my life in very great ways!! My whole congregation will be advised to make this book a priority!!

[Kim · Rating 4 out of 5]

I received this as a free give away through Goodreads First Reads. & I am very thankful I did.
If Only Letting Go of Regret is a title all should read whether Christian or not. Regret can create anger, hurt, & loss time of moving on. Let it go. Forgive yourself, but do not forget; it is not good to repeat pur "mistakes."

[Laura R Bransky · Rating 5 out of 5]

Michelle uses her gift of writing to bring light and shed hope into unaddressed areas of the heart where regrets can override joy. Well written, thoughtful, prayerful.

[Maribeth Van loon · Rating 3 out of 5]

A good examination of a topic with which many of us struggle. Combines Biblical insight with lots of anecdotal and personal examples and explores many different facets of regret. I came away with a sense of hope, if not a lot of resolution.

[Carole Duff · Rating 5 out of 5]

Regret, an unavoidable result of loss, and an opportunity to redeem an undivided heart. By sharing some of her experiences, Michelle Van Loon walks her readers through the process of recognizing regret and letting it go. Highly recommend.

[Beth Peninger · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars

Thank you to NetGalley and Nazarene Publishing House for this free copy. In an exchange for this copy I am giving an honest review.

Regret is something every person encounters in their life. I am not aware of one person who doesn't have regret in their life. The tough thing about regret is letting it go. So when I saw the title and premise of this book I was definitely curious about what Van Loon would have to share.
The "problem" with having been birthed straight into the church nursery is I pretty have heard it all, very rarely do I hear or read new ideas that haven't been circulated throughout evangelical circles. Van Loon's book fell into that category for me but it wouldn't for everyone. I did appreciate and like how she connected shalom with letting go of regret. I don't believe the church has given shalom enough attention and application so I liked that Van Loon brought it into the discussion. Not only does the author discuss letting go of regret but she talks about regrets being redeemed. Redemption is vital to complete healing and transformation.
It's an important topic but because so much of it was familiar I became restless reading it and was ready to be done with the book. For newer believers this book would be especially good as they transition from a life of flesh living to that of spirit living.

[Justin & Danette Edgar · Rating 4 out of 5]

I liked the book. Good stories and examples of regret...Good gospel help in dealing with regret. My favorite quote: Christ indeed makes all things new. He is at work to reunite our divided hearts. This means that he will reclaim, redeem, and repurpose every single one of our regrets as we submit ourselves to his work in our lives. In light of our regrets, we can pray: “Teach me your way, LORD, that I may rely on your faithfulness; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name” (Ps. 86: 11)...

[amber · Rating 1 out of 5]

The writing was mediocre and comes from so eone who is unqualified to give such bold instructions about letting go. From what I've seen about the author there are no credentials for writing, ministering, or psychology other than personal experience. I can see where this book could appeal to some. After reading books by qualified researchers such as Brené Brown and talented writers who have gone outside their comfort zone to understand emotions like Cheryl Strayed and Elizabeth Gilbert I really can't take this book seriously.

[Brenda Seefeldt · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love the topic but didn't resonate with the author. I still recommend this book.