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Alter Ego
Sometimes you just need to get a little lost before you find your way back again...
Six months ago, something happened that changed everything for Hattie. The next morning, she came up with The Plan. It was time for a whole new life. That's how Hattie ends up in a little cabin in the middle of nowhere, where the woodland stretches for miles and stars light up the night sky. Here, Hattie can be whoever she wants to be.
At two years old, Hattie was diagnosed with a condition that would alter the course of her life. Ever since then she's had to constantly explain herself and pretend that the pitying looks don't bother her.
If she wants The Plan to work, nobody back home can know why she really left, and nobody in her new life can know the truth about her.
But it's not long before she's caught in her lies - trapped between who she really is, and who she so desperately wants to be. When everything falls apart, can she piece herself back together?
If you've ever felt a little lost, wanted to hide, or struggled to accept yourself, you will see yourself in the pages of this book. Perfect for fans of Kirsty Capes and Daisy Buchanan, this unputdownable, hilarious and achingly relatable page-turner will break your heart, mend it anew and leave you with a smile on your face.
Six months ago, something happened that changed everything for Hattie. The next morning, she came up with The Plan. It was time for a whole new life. That's how Hattie ends up in a little cabin in the middle of nowhere, where the woodland stretches for miles and stars light up the night sky. Here, Hattie can be whoever she wants to be.
At two years old, Hattie was diagnosed with a condition that would alter the course of her life. Ever since then she's had to constantly explain herself and pretend that the pitying looks don't bother her.
If she wants The Plan to work, nobody back home can know why she really left, and nobody in her new life can know the truth about her.
But it's not long before she's caught in her lies - trapped between who she really is, and who she so desperately wants to be. When everything falls apart, can she piece herself back together?
If you've ever felt a little lost, wanted to hide, or struggled to accept yourself, you will see yourself in the pages of this book. Perfect for fans of Kirsty Capes and Daisy Buchanan, this unputdownable, hilarious and achingly relatable page-turner will break your heart, mend it anew and leave you with a smile on your face.
- GenresDisabilityFiction
336 pages, Kindle Edition
Published July 18, 2024
12 people are currently reading
405 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews
November 28, 2025
5 stars
omg I loved this book so much !!!!
I was sobbing. i felt so bad for hattie. I do understand why she left
( because belittling someone isn't cute x )
I fucking her employee so much why did they do that to her ?!?! ( with or without the disability)
I loved pearl and hatties friendship and hattie and aidens !!!
but man fuck Ella!!!!
omg I loved this book so much !!!!
I was sobbing. i felt so bad for hattie. I do understand why she left
( because belittling someone isn't cute x )
I fucking her employee so much why did they do that to her ?!?! ( with or without the disability)
I loved pearl and hatties friendship and hattie and aidens !!!
but man fuck Ella!!!!
June 20, 2024
4.5-5 stars
Thanks to Renegade and Dialogue Publishing for the gifted proof of this title in return for an honest review.
**Contains Slight Spoilers**
Seven years ago, I started to become ill, and since then I have had to learn how to live and navigate this world as a disabled person. And something tat has really become obvious to me is that you hardly ever see disabled people in literature, unless they're the side act, or a novelty. You never see (or at least I've never seen) characters who just so happen to be disabled living their life as if they were an able-bodied character. So this was instantly refreshing before I'd even read it.
This truly gets to the heart of what it's like to be a young disabled woman in an able-bodied world. Within the first chapter or two, I knew this would be something special.
Now, if I'm not mistaken, I do believe Helen herself has some sort of disability but I'm not going to pry into what, that's her business, but you can really tell how much it means to her, every word is there to perfectly explain what it's like, the struggles, the judging, and the fears.
I loved the frustration shown by Hattie that if you don't look disabled - e.g. in a wheelchair - if you look "normal", then people don't believe you're actually disabled. They moan when you park in a disabled bay even if you have a blue badge, they tut when you use the disabled toilet. They think you're just using excuses not to do things. And it's hard. It's hard being disabled to begin with, but it's hard to have to prove to strangers that you're ill enough to "qualify" and that's where I think Helen has excelled. That frustration and anger and how tired it makes you to have to keep proving yourself. Ad the desperation to be "normal" to fit in.
I liked Hattie for the majority of the book. I felt compassion for her and an understanding. There were times where she's sort of, she's deceiving people and lying about things to run away from her problems. I completely understand why she does it, but at times I found her a bit unlikeable and aloof.
What I will say with certainty is that I really didn't like her friend Elle. The person she'd spent nearly her whole life with, her best friend; she just didn't seem to care about her friend's health, she felt very egotistical and better than everyone. She wouldn't give Hattie time to explain, she kept pushing and pushing and, no matter what redeemable qualities she may have had, I disliked her from the start to the end.
It has a very interesting format. The crux of it is written in the present, us going along with Hattie's life as it is now. But there are also chapters set in the past. As a child or whatnot, so we get to learn how her disability has affected her whole life. And then we get mysterious pages with just one paragraph, titled "the night that changed everything", which is very intriguing. And some of it is formatted in text messages too. It gives us an interesting way to look at Hattie's life and fiends and family etc. without it being too heavy.
I, like a lot of readers I imagine, don't necessarily read every single word in a book individually, we tend to scan a bit and read sentences as a whole. But every now and again you come across a book that deserves to have every single word read and digested and appreciated and this is one of them. Which is why it took me a little longer to read than a book this length normally would, but it felt necessary.
It made me really angry and frustrated at times, much like Hattie felt How difficult this life can be, the things no-one thinks about, the differences between being able to climb one flight of stairs but the impossibility of climbing two flights. And the way the other characters were behaving - not deliberately, I don't think there was any ableist malice there - they just don't understand, and they say and do things and act in ways that are very hurtful to Hattie, and I really felt that.
It's not the most uplifting of books in my opinion. It does have uplifting moments, funny moments, but it's got a sad undertone through it that - whilst I liked the book immensely and will be suggesting it to everyone - could possibly be a bit too negative for some. It's difficult, because it's really about personal preference. I liked it and that may be because I could relate so much.
It doesn't mention what disability Hattie has. I had my thoughts, and a lot of it sounded similar to me, but I thought it was interesting because Helen could have said what it was at the start, but this way, it gives us the chance to imagine and find bits of her we recognise ourselves in.
What I think she has really captured well is two fold. Firstly, when you're disabled, and if you have closed friends who understand your disability, you end up not seeing it, it's just who you are, and then it's a shock when someone new tries to mention it and work around it. But secondly, on the flip side, because you do live with it, you can find it frustrating when no-one knows about it, when they can't (or don't) see what's wrong.
I think it's an interesting book to read for anyone; helpful if you're not disabled to maybe open your eyes, but also for those living that life. It's not preachy, it's not a non-fiction book about how to live with a disability, it's not in your face, on the nose kind of thing. It is entertaining, sometimes funny, exciting, interesting, maddening - it's got everything you want rom a book but with some added issues that gives it that depth.
Thanks to Renegade and Dialogue Publishing for the gifted proof of this title in return for an honest review.
**Contains Slight Spoilers**
Seven years ago, I started to become ill, and since then I have had to learn how to live and navigate this world as a disabled person. And something tat has really become obvious to me is that you hardly ever see disabled people in literature, unless they're the side act, or a novelty. You never see (or at least I've never seen) characters who just so happen to be disabled living their life as if they were an able-bodied character. So this was instantly refreshing before I'd even read it.
This truly gets to the heart of what it's like to be a young disabled woman in an able-bodied world. Within the first chapter or two, I knew this would be something special.
Now, if I'm not mistaken, I do believe Helen herself has some sort of disability but I'm not going to pry into what, that's her business, but you can really tell how much it means to her, every word is there to perfectly explain what it's like, the struggles, the judging, and the fears.
I loved the frustration shown by Hattie that if you don't look disabled - e.g. in a wheelchair - if you look "normal", then people don't believe you're actually disabled. They moan when you park in a disabled bay even if you have a blue badge, they tut when you use the disabled toilet. They think you're just using excuses not to do things. And it's hard. It's hard being disabled to begin with, but it's hard to have to prove to strangers that you're ill enough to "qualify" and that's where I think Helen has excelled. That frustration and anger and how tired it makes you to have to keep proving yourself. Ad the desperation to be "normal" to fit in.
I liked Hattie for the majority of the book. I felt compassion for her and an understanding. There were times where she's sort of, she's deceiving people and lying about things to run away from her problems. I completely understand why she does it, but at times I found her a bit unlikeable and aloof.
What I will say with certainty is that I really didn't like her friend Elle. The person she'd spent nearly her whole life with, her best friend; she just didn't seem to care about her friend's health, she felt very egotistical and better than everyone. She wouldn't give Hattie time to explain, she kept pushing and pushing and, no matter what redeemable qualities she may have had, I disliked her from the start to the end.
It has a very interesting format. The crux of it is written in the present, us going along with Hattie's life as it is now. But there are also chapters set in the past. As a child or whatnot, so we get to learn how her disability has affected her whole life. And then we get mysterious pages with just one paragraph, titled "the night that changed everything", which is very intriguing. And some of it is formatted in text messages too. It gives us an interesting way to look at Hattie's life and fiends and family etc. without it being too heavy.
I, like a lot of readers I imagine, don't necessarily read every single word in a book individually, we tend to scan a bit and read sentences as a whole. But every now and again you come across a book that deserves to have every single word read and digested and appreciated and this is one of them. Which is why it took me a little longer to read than a book this length normally would, but it felt necessary.
It made me really angry and frustrated at times, much like Hattie felt How difficult this life can be, the things no-one thinks about, the differences between being able to climb one flight of stairs but the impossibility of climbing two flights. And the way the other characters were behaving - not deliberately, I don't think there was any ableist malice there - they just don't understand, and they say and do things and act in ways that are very hurtful to Hattie, and I really felt that.
It's not the most uplifting of books in my opinion. It does have uplifting moments, funny moments, but it's got a sad undertone through it that - whilst I liked the book immensely and will be suggesting it to everyone - could possibly be a bit too negative for some. It's difficult, because it's really about personal preference. I liked it and that may be because I could relate so much.
It doesn't mention what disability Hattie has. I had my thoughts, and a lot of it sounded similar to me, but I thought it was interesting because Helen could have said what it was at the start, but this way, it gives us the chance to imagine and find bits of her we recognise ourselves in.
What I think she has really captured well is two fold. Firstly, when you're disabled, and if you have closed friends who understand your disability, you end up not seeing it, it's just who you are, and then it's a shock when someone new tries to mention it and work around it. But secondly, on the flip side, because you do live with it, you can find it frustrating when no-one knows about it, when they can't (or don't) see what's wrong.
I think it's an interesting book to read for anyone; helpful if you're not disabled to maybe open your eyes, but also for those living that life. It's not preachy, it's not a non-fiction book about how to live with a disability, it's not in your face, on the nose kind of thing. It is entertaining, sometimes funny, exciting, interesting, maddening - it's got everything you want rom a book but with some added issues that gives it that depth.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 19, 2024
*4.5 stars*
Hattie has a plan. It wasn’t an overnight, rushed sort of plan either. It was meticulous, and just might work. Right? It all started after a traumatic incidence of misguided clarity months previously, when afterward she came up with a convincing plan to start a whole new life so that she didn’t have to face that kind of strife ever again. Making up a new roommate, a fake address and tangle of lies in her path, Hattie severs the tie to London for the open road toward Wales. Goodbye to her friends that, although love her deeply, treat her like she’s fragile. And most of all, farewell to Disabled Hattie.
As soon as she leaves in the car, the entirety packed with her whole belongings, New Hattie’s life begins. And New Hattie can be whoever she wants to be without people knowing her history—without knowing that, since she was diagnosed at two, she has had a disability that can affect her differently depending on the circumstances, including weakness and being fall-prone. Settling into a remote location where no one knows Old Hattie, New Hattie begins the reinvention process. Of course, she has to balance some of the tethers to her old life, writing to her friends with upbeat lies about her life and work whilst trying to play it unsuspectingly. But when her old life is clawing to hang on and interfere with her plan, Hattie finds that letting go of who you are isn’t as simple as trying to start over. Lost and not where she dreamed her new lease of life would lead her, Hattie comes to the realisation that to face the future, she needs to accept the past. But if accepting who she is should be simple, why does it feel so hard?
Overall, Alter Ego was lionhearted in it’s exploration of disability and what it means to live with an indelible fate. Helen weaves Hattie’s life with the kind of tapestry that any disabled and chronically ill person can see flickers of themselves in, and her way of eloquently writing just hurts at times—but how it heals, too. I saw my younger self in Hattie’s stubbornness to not be labelled as “disabled”, a response that is something unique to every person who falls under that category. Although I wasn’t a fan of some of Hattie’s old friends back home (regrettably seeing some of my old friends in their actions of covert ableism or just plain ignorance) someone I was a fan of was Hattie. Her heart, her will and want to live without chains to any sort of label or box. She was courageous in her search for a normal life, and although it wasn’t quite the right way to go about it in the end, I loved how her story wrapped up. A seriously uplifting, funny and heartwarming book. I can’t wait to read more from Helen.
Hattie has a plan. It wasn’t an overnight, rushed sort of plan either. It was meticulous, and just might work. Right? It all started after a traumatic incidence of misguided clarity months previously, when afterward she came up with a convincing plan to start a whole new life so that she didn’t have to face that kind of strife ever again. Making up a new roommate, a fake address and tangle of lies in her path, Hattie severs the tie to London for the open road toward Wales. Goodbye to her friends that, although love her deeply, treat her like she’s fragile. And most of all, farewell to Disabled Hattie.
As soon as she leaves in the car, the entirety packed with her whole belongings, New Hattie’s life begins. And New Hattie can be whoever she wants to be without people knowing her history—without knowing that, since she was diagnosed at two, she has had a disability that can affect her differently depending on the circumstances, including weakness and being fall-prone. Settling into a remote location where no one knows Old Hattie, New Hattie begins the reinvention process. Of course, she has to balance some of the tethers to her old life, writing to her friends with upbeat lies about her life and work whilst trying to play it unsuspectingly. But when her old life is clawing to hang on and interfere with her plan, Hattie finds that letting go of who you are isn’t as simple as trying to start over. Lost and not where she dreamed her new lease of life would lead her, Hattie comes to the realisation that to face the future, she needs to accept the past. But if accepting who she is should be simple, why does it feel so hard?
Overall, Alter Ego was lionhearted in it’s exploration of disability and what it means to live with an indelible fate. Helen weaves Hattie’s life with the kind of tapestry that any disabled and chronically ill person can see flickers of themselves in, and her way of eloquently writing just hurts at times—but how it heals, too. I saw my younger self in Hattie’s stubbornness to not be labelled as “disabled”, a response that is something unique to every person who falls under that category. Although I wasn’t a fan of some of Hattie’s old friends back home (regrettably seeing some of my old friends in their actions of covert ableism or just plain ignorance) someone I was a fan of was Hattie. Her heart, her will and want to live without chains to any sort of label or box. She was courageous in her search for a normal life, and although it wasn’t quite the right way to go about it in the end, I loved how her story wrapped up. A seriously uplifting, funny and heartwarming book. I can’t wait to read more from Helen.
November 3, 2024
As someone who has been brought up around disability and have a long term health condition that limits my mobility this book broke my heart. Poor Hattie after one let down to many by her best friend decides to lie to all of her family and friends and move to Wales and try to live her life without anyone knowing she’s disabled. However with her condition trying to act able bodied is not as simple as she first imagined and even opening the front door of her airb&b is impossible. As she hides from her old life and keeps trying to cover everything up in her new life her health starts to spiral and she is forced to face up to the facts that being disabled is not a bad thing but maybe she needs to speak out more about her true feelings and not keep quiet just to make things easier as it’s damaging her.. This is a heartbeaking read but a beautiful book with a satisfying conclusion.
September 1, 2024
Loved this book a perfect description of what it is like to have an invisible disability
I very much enjoyed this novel which perfectly describes the difficulties of a life affected by an invisible disability. I myself suffer from chronic pain related to severe arthritis and found it very easy to empathise with the main character. Hattie.
Hattie wishes herself healthy and has gone as far as moving away from her friends to a new part of the country and starting a new job. She doesn’t tell any of her new friends and work colleagues about her medical condition and lies to her friends about living with a new boyfriend. Oh what a tangled web she would weaves probably not unexpected things go wrong and she gets into a real mess ultimately needing her friends both New and Old to help her.
As a person her self suffers from a largely invisible disability with many of the same issues that the main character in this novel has I felt that this description was enc accurate. I entirely empathise with the characters frustration although perhaps not with her outbursts of anger.
The author has a beautiful flowing writing style and the novel was a pleasure to read although the subject matter was potentially quite upsetting. The author manages to deal with all the issues with the subtlety and lightness that does not deflect from their significance. It was a pleasure to read a main character with a disability.
There is a little potential love Story in the middle of the book and I was pleased to see that the author didn’t choose the most obvious way to conclude this relationship. It made the novel feel more real.
I particularly enjoyed this. Paragraph“When people come, they come to get fixed because they can’t fix you where do you go next? When the people who are meant to fix you can’t you start to see the cracks in all things all places all people” this really rang true to me.
I would recommend the novel to those who enjoy our primarily relationship based novel the book that I’ve read that I see the most similarity to our is still life a memoir by Josie George, which is as a title suggests a true story about the authors chronic illness.
I read an early copy of the novel on NetGalley UK. The book was published on the 18th of July 2024 by Dialogue books.
This review will appear on NetGalley UK, Goodreads, and my book blog bionic Sarah S books at work press.com. It will also appear on Amazon UK.
I very much enjoyed this novel which perfectly describes the difficulties of a life affected by an invisible disability. I myself suffer from chronic pain related to severe arthritis and found it very easy to empathise with the main character. Hattie.
Hattie wishes herself healthy and has gone as far as moving away from her friends to a new part of the country and starting a new job. She doesn’t tell any of her new friends and work colleagues about her medical condition and lies to her friends about living with a new boyfriend. Oh what a tangled web she would weaves probably not unexpected things go wrong and she gets into a real mess ultimately needing her friends both New and Old to help her.
As a person her self suffers from a largely invisible disability with many of the same issues that the main character in this novel has I felt that this description was enc accurate. I entirely empathise with the characters frustration although perhaps not with her outbursts of anger.
The author has a beautiful flowing writing style and the novel was a pleasure to read although the subject matter was potentially quite upsetting. The author manages to deal with all the issues with the subtlety and lightness that does not deflect from their significance. It was a pleasure to read a main character with a disability.
There is a little potential love Story in the middle of the book and I was pleased to see that the author didn’t choose the most obvious way to conclude this relationship. It made the novel feel more real.
I particularly enjoyed this. Paragraph“When people come, they come to get fixed because they can’t fix you where do you go next? When the people who are meant to fix you can’t you start to see the cracks in all things all places all people” this really rang true to me.
I would recommend the novel to those who enjoy our primarily relationship based novel the book that I’ve read that I see the most similarity to our is still life a memoir by Josie George, which is as a title suggests a true story about the authors chronic illness.
I read an early copy of the novel on NetGalley UK. The book was published on the 18th of July 2024 by Dialogue books.
This review will appear on NetGalley UK, Goodreads, and my book blog bionic Sarah S books at work press.com. It will also appear on Amazon UK.
November 20, 2025
Es war mein erstes Buch, in dem die Hauptperson eine Behinderung hat und vielleicht hat es mich gerade deshalb auch besonders gefesselt und zum Nachdenken angeregt.
Ich habe den Eindruck, Hatties Frust, Wut und Verzweiflung darüber immer anders behandelt zu werden durchs Lesen spüren zu können. Ich fühlte mit ihr wie schmerzhaft Ableismus sein muss, sowohl bei einer sichtbaren aber auch äußerlich unerkennbaren Beeinträchtigung wie bei ihr. Ich habe davon einiges gelernt.
Unabhängig von der Disability Thematik geht es in "Alter Ego" aber auch einfach um Freundschaft und was es dafür braucht sich gegenseitig zu akzeptieren.
Ich bin froh, dieses Buch gelesen zu haben.
Hinweis: gelesen im englischen Original
Ich habe den Eindruck, Hatties Frust, Wut und Verzweiflung darüber immer anders behandelt zu werden durchs Lesen spüren zu können. Ich fühlte mit ihr wie schmerzhaft Ableismus sein muss, sowohl bei einer sichtbaren aber auch äußerlich unerkennbaren Beeinträchtigung wie bei ihr. Ich habe davon einiges gelernt.
Unabhängig von der Disability Thematik geht es in "Alter Ego" aber auch einfach um Freundschaft und was es dafür braucht sich gegenseitig zu akzeptieren.
Ich bin froh, dieses Buch gelesen zu haben.
Hinweis: gelesen im englischen Original
September 9, 2024
This was always going to get a good rating from me: I strongly and firmly believe that the issue of disability (and ESPECIALLY invisible disability) is a thoroughly under-utilised and under-represented subject in media - and even when it is used, it just doesn't seem to get much traction in the same way that other issues do. Maybe it's because it hits so close to home for me but I will always be a supporter of books that start these conversations, even if the conversation isn't perfect. Give me good books about disability, give me bad books about disability, give me complex theoretical explorations of disability, give me mainstream page turners and easy-reads about disability, I want it all, just please let's continue to make people stop and think about what it's like to not be able-bodied I beg.
Now in all honesty: I started off on the wrong foot with this book - I have a weird pet-peeve for compulsive liars in stories or characters who purposefully refuse to communicate and in doing so make their situation way worse (basically anything that makes me want to throw the book across the room and shout 'TALK TO EACH OTHER FOR FUCK'S SAKE') so after reading the first few chapters, me and this book were not on the greatest of terms to say the least.
I did end up changing my mind since luckily the book does a good job of showing how, due the different layers of trauma built by years of micro-aggressions and lack of healthy coping mechanisms, Hattie has become the way she is. This was especially true with some of the late-book conversations between Hattie and Ella which resonated way too deeply with me and reminded how absolutely INFURIATING it can be to have some people, even people who think they have your best interest at heart, simply not get it, not matter how much you talk and try to communicate with them. The fact that there was no simple resolution between them and that the solution actually ISN'T as simple as 'talk to each other!', ended up being one of the major selling points of this book.
I still wouldn't say this was the best book I've ever read about the subject, and I do believe that on occasion it just is a little too far-fetched for me to completely relate to Hattie. But it has way more than enough heart to make up for it and then some.
Thank you to NetGalley, the publishers and the author for the e-ARC of this book in exchange for my honest opinion.
Now in all honesty: I started off on the wrong foot with this book - I have a weird pet-peeve for compulsive liars in stories or characters who purposefully refuse to communicate and in doing so make their situation way worse (basically anything that makes me want to throw the book across the room and shout 'TALK TO EACH OTHER FOR FUCK'S SAKE') so after reading the first few chapters, me and this book were not on the greatest of terms to say the least.
I did end up changing my mind since luckily the book does a good job of showing how, due the different layers of trauma built by years of micro-aggressions and lack of healthy coping mechanisms, Hattie has become the way she is. This was especially true with some of the late-book conversations between Hattie and Ella which resonated way too deeply with me and reminded how absolutely INFURIATING it can be to have some people, even people who think they have your best interest at heart, simply not get it, not matter how much you talk and try to communicate with them. The fact that there was no simple resolution between them and that the solution actually ISN'T as simple as 'talk to each other!', ended up being one of the major selling points of this book.
I still wouldn't say this was the best book I've ever read about the subject, and I do believe that on occasion it just is a little too far-fetched for me to completely relate to Hattie. But it has way more than enough heart to make up for it and then some.
Thank you to NetGalley, the publishers and the author for the e-ARC of this book in exchange for my honest opinion.
July 16, 2024
"Sometimes you just need to get a little lost before you find your way back again."
This is a brilliantly written book that really does make you see the world differently, even if just for a few moments.
Hattie is a woman with a plan, and that plan involves completely removing herself from the life she has always lived. A plan to reinvent herself in a place that nobody knows her or her disability. A brave decision or one that will she will regret?
Hattie has a disability, a disability that she is now fighting to hide from her 'new' life. She is sick of being the 'disabled' one in her group, the one who constantly recieves pitying looks and hears the whispers around the room. Even worse is the fact that her childhood friends all treat her as if she's made of glass and they are the ones who supposedly really know her.
This is a really powerful story that I think anyone could relate to, not just those with an illness or disability. We have all avoided confronting our problems at some point, and Hattie is the master of burying her head in the sand.
A story of new beginnings and new friends that had me laughing out loud one minute and feeling heartbroken the next.
Thanks to Netgalley and Dialogue Books for the ARC.
This is a brilliantly written book that really does make you see the world differently, even if just for a few moments.
Hattie is a woman with a plan, and that plan involves completely removing herself from the life she has always lived. A plan to reinvent herself in a place that nobody knows her or her disability. A brave decision or one that will she will regret?
Hattie has a disability, a disability that she is now fighting to hide from her 'new' life. She is sick of being the 'disabled' one in her group, the one who constantly recieves pitying looks and hears the whispers around the room. Even worse is the fact that her childhood friends all treat her as if she's made of glass and they are the ones who supposedly really know her.
This is a really powerful story that I think anyone could relate to, not just those with an illness or disability. We have all avoided confronting our problems at some point, and Hattie is the master of burying her head in the sand.
A story of new beginnings and new friends that had me laughing out loud one minute and feeling heartbroken the next.
Thanks to Netgalley and Dialogue Books for the ARC.
August 5, 2024
Starting again is never easy. Hattie has a simple plan to re-start her life, away from her overbearing and often insensitive friends, she moves to Wales where no-one knows she is living with a painful, hidden disability. This was a thoughtful story exploring the modern world as a young person living with a hidden illness, Hattie struggles with certain everyday tasks and physical pain, requiring additional effort and mental load when navigating work, love, and friendship. Her desire for freedom and a sense of ‘normality’ is incredibly relatable especially as we work through the plot, with short chapters taking us back to how in pivotal moments of growing up her disability has been cruelly acknowledged by those around her. Dealing not only with the physical elements of a chronic illness or disability, but with the social element which creates heart-wrenching moments. This was an important narrative, one which I don’t think is often explored and in Alter Ego it is done with humour and heart. Hattie is an incredibly likeable lead, weaving a tangled web of lies in an attempt for a fresh start. It inevitably will unravel, but you root for her all the way.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC.
July 15, 2024
Hattie has got a plan, she needs to get away from her old life and start somewhere new without telling anyone the real reason why she has upped sticks and left. They all think she is moving in with her new boyfriend but no boyfriend exists and Hattie wants to break free from normality and start afresh. Hattie was diagnosed with a condition that affects her whole life and she hates how it affects her life and that everyone takes pity on her and she is struggling to be who she wants to be. Getting away from everyone, she doesn’t realise how much she needs her family and simple things are still a struggle. I didn’t think in a million years how much this book would resonate with me. I have struggled with health issues all my life but because people cannot see inside me, they think I am fine. Hattie really pulled at my heartstrings and I found a few things that were so relatable to me. I wanted Hattie to have a good life but I also know it is better to have family around you than to not. I laughed and cried throughout this most powerful read.
August 8, 2024
An incredible debut exploring inclusivity and self-acceptance that had me feeling all the emotions! I loved the powerful writing, the warmth, wisdom, humour and heartbreaking moments so well conveyed. I was completely invested in Hattie’s journey making it an unputdownable read not to be missed!
I loved spending time with Hattie, she’s relatable, endearing, resilient, and the tremendous characterisation had me fully rooting for her. Hattie wants to show the world the person she truly is, she can no longer deal with the negative reactions to her disability and even her closest friends don’t seem to understand what she’s going through. This prompts Hattie to implement The Plan, what’s a little white lie or two to get the life she wants and embrace the person she wants the world to see?
It’s frank and real providing representation for disabilities that are not immediately obvious in an insightful way, changing the lens through which we see the world. The need to fit in and wanting to hide parts of ourselves is compelling. I also loved how the importance of communication shines through, of expressing yourself and being listened to and understood. However, as the web of lies spiral out of control is the freedom Hattie craves at risk?
Aiden and Themba were amazing characters – their understanding and support was invaluable.
Alter Ego will resonate with many readers, it’s a story of self-belief and moving forward that will stay with me, and the superb characters brought to life capture a little piece of your heart.
With thanks to @Christina_Dem, @dialoguepub and @lehenner for my review copy.
I loved spending time with Hattie, she’s relatable, endearing, resilient, and the tremendous characterisation had me fully rooting for her. Hattie wants to show the world the person she truly is, she can no longer deal with the negative reactions to her disability and even her closest friends don’t seem to understand what she’s going through. This prompts Hattie to implement The Plan, what’s a little white lie or two to get the life she wants and embrace the person she wants the world to see?
It’s frank and real providing representation for disabilities that are not immediately obvious in an insightful way, changing the lens through which we see the world. The need to fit in and wanting to hide parts of ourselves is compelling. I also loved how the importance of communication shines through, of expressing yourself and being listened to and understood. However, as the web of lies spiral out of control is the freedom Hattie craves at risk?
Aiden and Themba were amazing characters – their understanding and support was invaluable.
Alter Ego will resonate with many readers, it’s a story of self-belief and moving forward that will stay with me, and the superb characters brought to life capture a little piece of your heart.
With thanks to @Christina_Dem, @dialoguepub and @lehenner for my review copy.
September 2, 2024
Alter Ego by Helen Heckety is the sort of novel that if you don't relate to it directly, you can relate to it in respect of people in your life.
Home, family, work, daily life, I could relate on every level and oh my heart ached by the end because it was so on point in respect of the experience of living with disability, hidden or otherwise, no matter the type, Hattie seeking humour as she endured, hiding her condition at work for fear of getting sacked, and putting so much energy into appearing "normal".
I don't know Helen Heckety's personal experience of this, but the empathy and insight is refreshing. An outstanding book
Thank you to NetGalley, Dialogue Books | Renegade Books and Helen Heckety for this awesome ARC. My review is left voluntarily and all opinions are my own
Home, family, work, daily life, I could relate on every level and oh my heart ached by the end because it was so on point in respect of the experience of living with disability, hidden or otherwise, no matter the type, Hattie seeking humour as she endured, hiding her condition at work for fear of getting sacked, and putting so much energy into appearing "normal".
I don't know Helen Heckety's personal experience of this, but the empathy and insight is refreshing. An outstanding book
Thank you to NetGalley, Dialogue Books | Renegade Books and Helen Heckety for this awesome ARC. My review is left voluntarily and all opinions are my own
September 13, 2024
A book that should be read by everyone, funny, enraging. uplifting & extremely relatable to those living in wobbly bodies. I loved this book and I needed to read this book. I read it straight through over two days. The book describes the many frustrations of living in a body that sort of, sometimes passes as non disabled, dealing with internalised ableism, how small it can make you feel having to constantly speak up for basic needs/rights but also how important communication and community are, particularly finding the right community who accepts you, sees you and loves you as you are. I will be listening to and reading this book many more times. I'm so happy it's in the world, especially for younger generations of disabled kids. We need more books like this, publishers, take note.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 15, 2024
This book is quite a journey! I would highly recommend it to anyone who struggles to feel comfortable in their own skin and find it challenging to love and accept themselves. As someone with a hidden disability, I found the story to be compelling, relatable, and honest. Hattie, the main character, is very relatable and well-developed, with flaws that can be a bit annoying at times, but they make her a raw and real character. The character development was my favorite aspect of the book. I haven't come across a similar book before, so I found it refreshing and a real page-turner. A big thank you to Helen and the publisher for granting me access to this ARC.
October 18, 2024
This is a surprisingly relatable read about the parts of ourselves that we keep hidden from others—and sometimes even from ourselves. The main character’s journey of self-discovery feels authentic and had me reflect on my identity. There’s a great balance between moments of introspection and humour, making it enjoyable without being too heavy. The story is engaging, and the characters feel real. If you're into books that make you think about personal growth and how we show up in the world, I’d recommend giving this one a go!
Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.
Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book in exchange for my honest review.
January 28, 2025
This book was funny and moving. It gave me an insight into the challenges you face if you are disabled or different. It made me think about people I know who are disabled and have known who are different and how I have been with them, could I have done better?
A quote: “I know that’s how it felt. You tried to adapt. You were told you were the problem, that you were too slow, not strong enough, so you chipped away at yourself, contorted yourself into a whole new shape. There was never anything wrong with you, but being told you were broken? That’s what made you break … And why shouldn’t other people change their ideas, be more inclusive, instead of you adapting your entire life?”
A quote: “I know that’s how it felt. You tried to adapt. You were told you were the problem, that you were too slow, not strong enough, so you chipped away at yourself, contorted yourself into a whole new shape. There was never anything wrong with you, but being told you were broken? That’s what made you break … And why shouldn’t other people change their ideas, be more inclusive, instead of you adapting your entire life?”
July 12, 2024
Alter Ego is exactly the book I've been searching for. Helen Heckety crafts a marvelous narrative that is relatable on so many levels. "Why can't I be who I want to be" is a particular line that has stayed with me. The honesty and humanity of the main character made her feel like a true friend. I finished the book last night and already miss spending time with her.
I powered through this book in two days and can't wait for Helen's next work.
Thank you to NetGalley and Renegade Books for the ARC.
5/5 Stars
I powered through this book in two days and can't wait for Helen's next work.
Thank you to NetGalley and Renegade Books for the ARC.
5/5 Stars
July 16, 2024
I could relate to so much of this character's struggle - and the mess she makes of sorting it out! Partly that's because I suffer from a chronic illness and so the frustration of having an invisible disability hit the nail right on the head - but I think that anyone would be able to relate to the way she avoids confronting her problems. The humour and the heartache make this story powerful.
December 5, 2025
This is a beautiful story about navigating life, ableism, and finding self-acceptance as a disabled person. I saw so much of my younger self in Hattie and cried with her as she learned to embrace her identity and stand firm in what she was willing to accept from the people around her. A must-read for everyone.
And fuck Ella!!!
And fuck Ella!!!
August 21, 2024
Knew nothing, saw in library’s New Releases section and LOVED ! Here’s to more main character disabled representation in fiction!!
September 24, 2024
Loved it
December 17, 2024
Such a brilliant read. Really fun, really thought provoking. A real page turner. Although I actually listened to the audiobook but this was joyously delivered. Would 100% recommend.
June 14, 2025
A very quick and easy read I really enjoyed this book as it makes you question circumstances and perception however it’s one that I likely wouldn’t rape about a perfect easy holiday read
September 24, 2025
“Sometimes you just need to get a little lost before you find your way back again.”
October 12, 2025
It's a book everyone should read.
October 20, 2025
:')
4.5 rounded up
4.5 rounded up
November 12, 2025
I have never felt so seen by a book. Thank you for writing the story of wanting to just leave it all behind and stop explaining
June 7, 2024
Hattie moves to a remote 'hut' in the countryside to get away from her old life and try to start a new life where no one knows anything about her and her disability. She also tries to keep contact with her 'friends' , making up stories about where she is living and working so as not to make them suspicious about what she's really up to - which is trying to get away from everything including them.
I really enjoyed this book which i found funny and heartbreaking at times.
I loved the whole aspect of her trying to find people she could connect with and found it heartbreaking the reasons why she couldn't connect with her childhood friend, even though, deep down, that's what she really wanted.
I would definitely recommend this book to anyone who enjoys an uplifting page turner.
I really enjoyed this book which i found funny and heartbreaking at times.
I loved the whole aspect of her trying to find people she could connect with and found it heartbreaking the reasons why she couldn't connect with her childhood friend, even though, deep down, that's what she really wanted.
I would definitely recommend this book to anyone who enjoys an uplifting page turner.
June 10, 2024
Hattie is tired of people only seeing her disability when people get to know her, the pitying glances, the whispers, the being treated like she's nothing but fragile and it hurts even more when it comes from her friends and family.
Wanting to escape her lived experience as a chronically ill woman, Hattie makes plans to move out of London and her friends flat to a remote location where no one knows her, and she can start over. Hattie plans on reinventing herself as someone without a disability. No one will know the truth about her in her new life or what happened six months to make her pack up and leave everything behind. Telling her friends she's moving in with a man that doesn't even exist. Hattie is about to undertake a journey of self-discovery, but will the truth catch up to her?
Full of heart and often hilarious but also achingly sad at the same time, I absolutely devoured Alter Ego. I felt so much empathy for Hattie and found her so relatable. Ultimately, she's seeking human connection and for someone to see her as a whole woman with the same desires and needs as anyone else. She goes on a real journey, and although watching her battling with her condition at times was often heartbreaking, she also has extraordinary resilience that will have you cheering her on from the sidelines.
This book is for anyone who has ever felt lost or who struggles with self-acceptance. I highly recommend this beautifully written book.
Wanting to escape her lived experience as a chronically ill woman, Hattie makes plans to move out of London and her friends flat to a remote location where no one knows her, and she can start over. Hattie plans on reinventing herself as someone without a disability. No one will know the truth about her in her new life or what happened six months to make her pack up and leave everything behind. Telling her friends she's moving in with a man that doesn't even exist. Hattie is about to undertake a journey of self-discovery, but will the truth catch up to her?
Full of heart and often hilarious but also achingly sad at the same time, I absolutely devoured Alter Ego. I felt so much empathy for Hattie and found her so relatable. Ultimately, she's seeking human connection and for someone to see her as a whole woman with the same desires and needs as anyone else. She goes on a real journey, and although watching her battling with her condition at times was often heartbreaking, she also has extraordinary resilience that will have you cheering her on from the sidelines.
This book is for anyone who has ever felt lost or who struggles with self-acceptance. I highly recommend this beautifully written book.
August 31, 2025
Wow, wow, wow. I honestly couldn’t put this down and devoured it in a day. I thought it was gonna be a cheesy sad awkward millennial girl book but it was SO much more. Can’t recommend it enough for a gripping, engrossing read but also one that will change the way you think about the world. Just read it!
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