When I first saw the title of this book, I assumed it was about something else. Well, until I picked it up. This book is something and more. Hands down Biko's best work, yet.
Biko has this thing with writing. It's like words come to him begging to be put together and he knows what to do with them. He then throws in the humor. It's a book to read in one sitting, but I did it three, because it's therapy. It was speaking to me.
The first thing that Biko brings out is how much we tie our dignity and humanity to what we do, rather than who we are. Most of us explain what we do to answer the question of who we are. When Samora loses his job, he loses his dignity and identity. As the ghost of unemployment strips him naked, it takes away what he also thought he was and what he had: friendships, relationships, family..and a marriage. In the words of Bitange Ndemo "when you lose your job, your phone literally stops ringing".
Secondly, and probably the key thing, is therapy. And especially men and therapy. Male friendships too. When life does a number on us, we get angry and start asking questions. We get angry with ourselves and suddenly, everything and everyone is irritating to you. Because of his ego, Samora deems it fit to live a lie for months rather than lose his dignity as a "man" and ask for help. A female friend is brutally honest with him but a male friend is better off taking him out for drinks and talking about anything but the elephant in the room. It takes real courage, especially for a man, to take up therapy. We all need therapy.
"Lies catch up. It's easier and less costly to tell the truth, even your truth"
PS: Your day ones will always ride with you. Rain or shine.