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Chosen Path: A Memoir
After D. Michael Quinn’s death in April 2021, his children found his remarkable, unpublished memoir in his home and entrusted Signature Books with its publication. Relying on his journals, primary research, and reminiscences, Quinn shares his life story as few have heard it–from his father’s hiding of his true name and Mexican identity, to his upbringing by his abusive grandmother, to his choice to closet his homosexuality, to his undying commitment to his faith and its history.
From the age of nine, Quinn felt convicted he would one day serve as an apostle of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He chose the path he believed would take him there, eventually living as a straight LDS family man in a mixed-orientation marriage. In the 1980s he became a BYU professor and one of Mormonism’s most promising, prolific, and respected historians. But his uncompromising commitment to total honesty about his religion’s history, along with his homosexuality, set him on a collision course with church leaders and the end of his seemingly idyllic Mormon life. Throughout his telling, Quinn unflinchingly opens up about his feelings and experiences that shaped his enigmatic life.
From the age of nine, Quinn felt convicted he would one day serve as an apostle of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He chose the path he believed would take him there, eventually living as a straight LDS family man in a mixed-orientation marriage. In the 1980s he became a BYU professor and one of Mormonism’s most promising, prolific, and respected historians. But his uncompromising commitment to total honesty about his religion’s history, along with his homosexuality, set him on a collision course with church leaders and the end of his seemingly idyllic Mormon life. Throughout his telling, Quinn unflinchingly opens up about his feelings and experiences that shaped his enigmatic life.
799 pages, Kindle Edition
Published December 18, 2023
18 people are currently reading
96 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews
May 16, 2025
This memoir was a treasure trove of information, I'm going to need a minute to process it all. Quinn bared his soul inside, and we get to know him (and the church) on a much deeper level. Will definitely be rereading in the future.
June 11, 2024
D. Michael Quinn's personal history and memoir was absolutely gripping. For anyone of a Mormon background, or a background in any high demand religion, I feel there are few more beneficial reads for shedding light on the complexities of being raised in those organizations. Particularly, Quinn's position as a person of deep faith and loyalty to Mormon teachings, a closeted homosexual, and a rigorous academic were shockingly relatable for me. Although we have major differences in personality, Quinn shared many personal thoughts--spanning his whole life--that could have come straight from my brain: on his own worthiness or lack thereof, on the trial of his gayness, on his love for God, and on his frequent disappointments in the very human leaders of the Church.
Quinn was excommunicated for his honest historical publications and his refusal to change his "warts and all" approach at a time when the Church engaged in extreme censorship. His conviction was that knowing the problems of history does not need to shake a person's faith or religious commitment. Church leaders did not agree with him, and he was part of an infamous slew of academic excommunications in 1993. Significantly, he had fought and succeeded his whole life to remain celibate of homosexual intimacy in order to retain his precious Church membership. The irony that his faith-driven publications were what ultimately pushed him out is a bitter one.
Quinn also relates his feelings on politics (his intense concern about the right-leaning tendencies of American Christians), his advocacy for minority groups and women, and his dismay at the political involvement of Church leaders (along with their own inner Church leadership politics). A true liberal Mormon (we need more of those)!
Although Quinn was pushed out of the Church, he remained a believing Mormon, if not a welcomed member, his whole life. He did so while disavowing what he construed as undoctrinal Mormon positions of bigotry, patriarchy, and white supremacy.
As a person of faith who also believes that every earthly religion is fraught with human weakness; as a gay person who struggled with self-acceptance my whole life because of religion; as an academic who believes in freedom of speech and integrity; Quinn's life story absolutely floored me.
What if every Mormon, every Catholic, every Evangelical had the bandwidth to live and believe in their religions while also letting go of hurtful doctrines and practices? What if religious people applied self-improvement and repentance to their religious practice--and expected it of their leaders--rather than trying to immortalize ancient customs and abuses and mortal leaders?
Even if one does not agree with Quinn everywhere, I believe that his memoir will inspire more compassion and nuance in any honest reader.
Quinn was excommunicated for his honest historical publications and his refusal to change his "warts and all" approach at a time when the Church engaged in extreme censorship. His conviction was that knowing the problems of history does not need to shake a person's faith or religious commitment. Church leaders did not agree with him, and he was part of an infamous slew of academic excommunications in 1993. Significantly, he had fought and succeeded his whole life to remain celibate of homosexual intimacy in order to retain his precious Church membership. The irony that his faith-driven publications were what ultimately pushed him out is a bitter one.
Quinn also relates his feelings on politics (his intense concern about the right-leaning tendencies of American Christians), his advocacy for minority groups and women, and his dismay at the political involvement of Church leaders (along with their own inner Church leadership politics). A true liberal Mormon (we need more of those)!
Although Quinn was pushed out of the Church, he remained a believing Mormon, if not a welcomed member, his whole life. He did so while disavowing what he construed as undoctrinal Mormon positions of bigotry, patriarchy, and white supremacy.
As a person of faith who also believes that every earthly religion is fraught with human weakness; as a gay person who struggled with self-acceptance my whole life because of religion; as an academic who believes in freedom of speech and integrity; Quinn's life story absolutely floored me.
What if every Mormon, every Catholic, every Evangelical had the bandwidth to live and believe in their religions while also letting go of hurtful doctrines and practices? What if religious people applied self-improvement and repentance to their religious practice--and expected it of their leaders--rather than trying to immortalize ancient customs and abuses and mortal leaders?
Even if one does not agree with Quinn everywhere, I believe that his memoir will inspire more compassion and nuance in any honest reader.
May 8, 2024
What a roller coaster! The sincerity of Quinn is clear. I was impressed by his ability to stand by his convictions despite many outside pressures. This book provides an insight into some of the inner workings of the Church hierarchy. We are lucky to have someone so passionate about the Church and the seeking truth. We are better as a people for his lived life.
April 15, 2024
Quinn bears his testimony and bares his soul.
March 15, 2024
Truly grateful for this memoir
I learned about this excellent memoir from an episode of Mormon Stories podcast. I am so happy to have read it. It is a perfect book club choice. As a small-time academic I feel a kinship to Quinn and his struggles against censorship and sanitized versions of history. His book on Joseph Smith’s magic worldview changed my life. I’m amazed by the Mormon history I learned in this book. I feel sad that I had never heard of Michael Quinn until after he left BYU. I was a student there when he was a professor. The church blew it when they kicked him out. He was so much better than the rest of them. I’m planning to read more of his writings soon. Thanks Signature Books for publishing this gem of a story.
I learned about this excellent memoir from an episode of Mormon Stories podcast. I am so happy to have read it. It is a perfect book club choice. As a small-time academic I feel a kinship to Quinn and his struggles against censorship and sanitized versions of history. His book on Joseph Smith’s magic worldview changed my life. I’m amazed by the Mormon history I learned in this book. I feel sad that I had never heard of Michael Quinn until after he left BYU. I was a student there when he was a professor. The church blew it when they kicked him out. He was so much better than the rest of them. I’m planning to read more of his writings soon. Thanks Signature Books for publishing this gem of a story.
July 29, 2024
This was such a compelling read. I feel both inspired and heartbroken at the account of a homosexual man forced out of a profession and faith that should have celebrated his work and accepted him as an individual. All of D. Michael Quinn’s historical work that I have read has been informed, interested, and clear in a way the social platitudes so common in LDS culture often preclude. His brief historical work on women and the church, so small I don’t even believe it was mentioned in this book, is nevertheless something that has warmed my soul and given me an adopted historical heritage that I can wholeheartedly celebrate. Thats especially important because it allows me to see the misogyny as a temporary case. For the LGBTQ members of the church that still have to struggle with the same dilemma he faced, my heart breaks and I hope I can be both advocate and confidant as they try to reconcile cohesive parts of their identity in the face of others who falsely try to force those identities apart.
(Also, hormones made me wake up crying the other night at the lack of an LDS intellectual tradition BECAUSE IM COOL COME AT ME and me binge reading this was an attempt to combat that feeling. It is somewhat addressed but the core is actually substantiated)
(Also, hormones made me wake up crying the other night at the lack of an LDS intellectual tradition BECAUSE IM COOL COME AT ME and me binge reading this was an attempt to combat that feeling. It is somewhat addressed but the core is actually substantiated)
August 9, 2024
I think anyone who has been involved with the LDS church or who has spent time at BYU would enjoy reading this book. And historians of the Restoration and its various off-shoots would, of course, also get a lot out of it.
The book calls itself a memoir, but it is effectively a journal of the author's life. Maybe that's the best kind of memoir or, at least, maybe it’s more accurate than memoirs based on musings years after the fact. In any case, I liked that raw, unprocessed format and, I have to say, I enjoyed this book as much as I’ve enjoyed any memoir that comes to mind.
The entries from the early years often don't bear exact date headings but, rather, general references to a month or a season of a year, e.g. “Fall of 1963”. This may be explained by the fact that, later on in the book, you learn that certain sections of his early years were excised because he didn't want anyone (primarily his wife) to read about his homosexual leanings and longings. It was disappointing to me to think that he would have erased a part of his growing up experience so callously. But I sympathize with his reason, and I think he does a pretty thorough job of re-introducing that element of his childhood into the final product.
In any case, I enjoyed reading about Quinn's take on his early years. Having been raised a Mormon in Utah myself, it's interesting to compare notes with someone who was raised in the same church in Southern California.
And, for anyone who grew up gay in the Church, or in any church, I think it would be even more interesting and, potentially, also very helpful to read these early chapters.
Quinn's college years at BYU were very interesting to read about, as well. I also attended BYU, and I had a personal acquaintance with several of the people Quinn interacted with and talks about in the book. It was fun to compare Quinn’s impressions of these people to my own. I especially enjoyed reading about Richard L. Anderson, who was my neighbor while I was growing up in Provo and the father of a couple of my friends. (Brother Anderson was a personable guy, and I will always appreciate and admire the effort he went to to connect with young people in our neighborhood, including me.)
Quinn expresses many of the same frustrations with BYU that I felt while I was a student there. For example, on page 475, he quotes a BYU colleague who bemoans the fact that BYU may never become a “real” university. All universities deal with politics, but BYU has the added complication of requiring professors to kowtow to the sensitivities of those who believe that their own ideas about what a religious university should be are the only valid ones.
Another thing I liked about the book was Quinn’s frequent musings and doubts in it about the morality of our country’s military activities. Like Quinn, I served in the military and, like Quinn, I’ve often wondered whether we do more damage than good in our various adventures around the world. Which is a reason conscientious objectors with an LDS connection might find the book worthwhile reading.
While in the military, Quinn had a Munich experience, which is something I also share with him. We even attended church in the same building in der Rückert Strasse near the Theresienwiese, although some ten years apart. All these common experiences heightened my appreciation of the book.
I have to say, I did find Quinn’s frequent musings on his future life as a GA a bit odd. Then again, I don’t believe I ever suffered any illusions that a guy like me would ever be recruited into any sort of leadership path. 🙂
Another thing I like about the book is that there are places here and there where the editing is weak, which sometimes makes it difficult to piece together exactly what he is talking about. But these are rare, and they just make me like larger-than-life Quinn even more than I already did by exposing his human side.
I took extensive notes while reading, and there's a lot more I could say, but I think perhaps this is enough for prospective readers to decide whether this book is for them or not.
The book calls itself a memoir, but it is effectively a journal of the author's life. Maybe that's the best kind of memoir or, at least, maybe it’s more accurate than memoirs based on musings years after the fact. In any case, I liked that raw, unprocessed format and, I have to say, I enjoyed this book as much as I’ve enjoyed any memoir that comes to mind.
The entries from the early years often don't bear exact date headings but, rather, general references to a month or a season of a year, e.g. “Fall of 1963”. This may be explained by the fact that, later on in the book, you learn that certain sections of his early years were excised because he didn't want anyone (primarily his wife) to read about his homosexual leanings and longings. It was disappointing to me to think that he would have erased a part of his growing up experience so callously. But I sympathize with his reason, and I think he does a pretty thorough job of re-introducing that element of his childhood into the final product.
In any case, I enjoyed reading about Quinn's take on his early years. Having been raised a Mormon in Utah myself, it's interesting to compare notes with someone who was raised in the same church in Southern California.
And, for anyone who grew up gay in the Church, or in any church, I think it would be even more interesting and, potentially, also very helpful to read these early chapters.
Quinn's college years at BYU were very interesting to read about, as well. I also attended BYU, and I had a personal acquaintance with several of the people Quinn interacted with and talks about in the book. It was fun to compare Quinn’s impressions of these people to my own. I especially enjoyed reading about Richard L. Anderson, who was my neighbor while I was growing up in Provo and the father of a couple of my friends. (Brother Anderson was a personable guy, and I will always appreciate and admire the effort he went to to connect with young people in our neighborhood, including me.)
Quinn expresses many of the same frustrations with BYU that I felt while I was a student there. For example, on page 475, he quotes a BYU colleague who bemoans the fact that BYU may never become a “real” university. All universities deal with politics, but BYU has the added complication of requiring professors to kowtow to the sensitivities of those who believe that their own ideas about what a religious university should be are the only valid ones.
Another thing I liked about the book was Quinn’s frequent musings and doubts in it about the morality of our country’s military activities. Like Quinn, I served in the military and, like Quinn, I’ve often wondered whether we do more damage than good in our various adventures around the world. Which is a reason conscientious objectors with an LDS connection might find the book worthwhile reading.
While in the military, Quinn had a Munich experience, which is something I also share with him. We even attended church in the same building in der Rückert Strasse near the Theresienwiese, although some ten years apart. All these common experiences heightened my appreciation of the book.
I have to say, I did find Quinn’s frequent musings on his future life as a GA a bit odd. Then again, I don’t believe I ever suffered any illusions that a guy like me would ever be recruited into any sort of leadership path. 🙂
Another thing I like about the book is that there are places here and there where the editing is weak, which sometimes makes it difficult to piece together exactly what he is talking about. But these are rare, and they just make me like larger-than-life Quinn even more than I already did by exposing his human side.
I took extensive notes while reading, and there's a lot more I could say, but I think perhaps this is enough for prospective readers to decide whether this book is for them or not.
October 19, 2024
So many sacrifices just to tell the truth
This is a very powerful and touching memoir of a man who sought to bring to light truths that were actively being hidden from members. Confirming that these truths WERE being consciously kept from membership as well as the fact they knew those truths were damaging, he suffered slander and ex communication from his church for his efforts. Sad and shameful that so many who knew first hand of his honest intentions turned their backs on him, blindly following the lies told by their church leaders rather than their own understanding. It's so difficult not to feel that his talents and his life were wasted on a deceptive, bigoted, misogynistic, and homophonic cult.
This is a very powerful and touching memoir of a man who sought to bring to light truths that were actively being hidden from members. Confirming that these truths WERE being consciously kept from membership as well as the fact they knew those truths were damaging, he suffered slander and ex communication from his church for his efforts. Sad and shameful that so many who knew first hand of his honest intentions turned their backs on him, blindly following the lies told by their church leaders rather than their own understanding. It's so difficult not to feel that his talents and his life were wasted on a deceptive, bigoted, misogynistic, and homophonic cult.
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May 7, 2024Readers of Quinn’s historical work will benefit from this deeply personal and forthcoming look into his life and the experiences that influenced his approach to research and writing. Includes a tortured recounting of his struggle to repress his homosexuality and the pain that caused him and his likewise longsuffering wife. I’d bet her memoir would also be fascinating and poignant.
Quinn’s personal and professional lives brought him into contact with a variety of high church leaders. The resulting vignettes are bound to be intrigue anyone interested in LDS Church governance. As with all Quinn’s books, this one taught me a number of things I’ve never heard anywhere else.
Quinn’s personal and professional lives brought him into contact with a variety of high church leaders. The resulting vignettes are bound to be intrigue anyone interested in LDS Church governance. As with all Quinn’s books, this one taught me a number of things I’ve never heard anywhere else.
December 29, 2024
I found this more enjoyable than I thought I would.
I certainly got a better appreciation on how someone could be someone that was a true believer in Mormonism while also being gay and wanting to shine a spotlight on less than faith promoting Mormon History. I walked away with some respect for Quinn and a bit less for some church leaders (and a bit more respect for a few of them).
I certainly got a better appreciation on how someone could be someone that was a true believer in Mormonism while also being gay and wanting to shine a spotlight on less than faith promoting Mormon History. I walked away with some respect for Quinn and a bit less for some church leaders (and a bit more respect for a few of them).
August 22, 2025
The sad, but interesting life of a Mormon historian, who was also a closeted homosexual for most of his adult life. Kind of depressing, but I learned a lot about the Mormon history he researched and particularly about the interactions he had with church leaders that wanted to suppress his writings.
Displaying 1 - 12 of 12 reviews