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Fair Princess #1
Fair Princess
Squirrel is a hard-hitting, foul-mouthed orphan raised in a traveling circus, and her one goal in life is to discover her real name.
If she knew that, maybe she'd be able to pierce the mystery of her past: Where did she come from, and who abandoned her on the side of the road twelve years ago?
Now is her opportunity. The king is hosting a competition for entertainers across the land, and the champion will receive a potent reward: A single question from The Oracle. The right question could make a man rich beyond measure, but Squirrel has other plans.
With a magically irrefutable answer at stake, Squirrel is determined to put on the greatest show her kingdom has ever seen and win the grand prize: Her identity.
But treacherous secrets lurk beneath the dazzling façade of royalty, and a single name uttered aloud might spell upheaval and death for Squirrel, her troupe, and the kingdom of Illiestar.
If she knew that, maybe she'd be able to pierce the mystery of her past: Where did she come from, and who abandoned her on the side of the road twelve years ago?
Now is her opportunity. The king is hosting a competition for entertainers across the land, and the champion will receive a potent reward: A single question from The Oracle. The right question could make a man rich beyond measure, but Squirrel has other plans.
With a magically irrefutable answer at stake, Squirrel is determined to put on the greatest show her kingdom has ever seen and win the grand prize: Her identity.
But treacherous secrets lurk beneath the dazzling façade of royalty, and a single name uttered aloud might spell upheaval and death for Squirrel, her troupe, and the kingdom of Illiestar.
- GenresFantasy
8 pages, Audiobook
First published November 21, 2023
74 people are currently reading
35 people want to read
About the author
Macronomicon
17 books278 followersI could tell you that the author is a middle class, middle age white dude with a generic wife and a generic pet who lives somewhere vaguely rural...but aren't they all?
F%$! that noise! There are Author Bios and then there's Mythos.
Welcome to the Mythos of Macronomicon.
Macronomicon is almost three years old now, hatched on the open-mic writing website Royal Road. The pen name burst from the cocoon of blissful ignorance and deposited his first humble contribution into the world of writing, tired and sticky, yet satisfied. Content in the knowledge his work would be warmly received by thousands of potential fans, and more importantly...friends.
The first comment was, "Can you, I don't know, make the main character less stupid?"
That was sobering.
Macronomicon has no actual weight, because he is a pen name, and while his existence is ephemeral, he does have a presence, often stalking the back-channels of Discord like a novelty vampire, waiting to suck nourishing creativity out of unfortunate* fans.
Macronomicon has a talent for brainstorming and stringing together disparate ideas into a cohesive story. That talent has been strengthened and built upon to form the foundation of his writing career. He once outlined the plot (quality notwithstanding) of an entire book from start to finish in a tiny room with nothing but Cheerios, beef jerky, Pepsi and B.O.**
If you wish to hunt for the elusive Macronomicon, you may find him at Royal Road, where he began, or Patreon, where he works*** at distilling new stories from a raw, chunky slurry of ideas.
*Or fortunate, depending on your point of view. The sucking is consensual.
**Quality of B.O. also notwithstanding.
*** Working is subjective.
F%$! that noise! There are Author Bios and then there's Mythos.
Welcome to the Mythos of Macronomicon.
Macronomicon is almost three years old now, hatched on the open-mic writing website Royal Road. The pen name burst from the cocoon of blissful ignorance and deposited his first humble contribution into the world of writing, tired and sticky, yet satisfied. Content in the knowledge his work would be warmly received by thousands of potential fans, and more importantly...friends.
The first comment was, "Can you, I don't know, make the main character less stupid?"
That was sobering.
Macronomicon has no actual weight, because he is a pen name, and while his existence is ephemeral, he does have a presence, often stalking the back-channels of Discord like a novelty vampire, waiting to suck nourishing creativity out of unfortunate* fans.
Macronomicon has a talent for brainstorming and stringing together disparate ideas into a cohesive story. That talent has been strengthened and built upon to form the foundation of his writing career. He once outlined the plot (quality notwithstanding) of an entire book from start to finish in a tiny room with nothing but Cheerios, beef jerky, Pepsi and B.O.**
If you wish to hunt for the elusive Macronomicon, you may find him at Royal Road, where he began, or Patreon, where he works*** at distilling new stories from a raw, chunky slurry of ideas.
*Or fortunate, depending on your point of view. The sucking is consensual.
**Quality of B.O. also notwithstanding.
*** Working is subjective.
Ratings & Reviews
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Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
September 9, 2024
Rumours of titular inaccuracy quashed amid hunt for missing punctuation!
Rumours of titular inaccuracy quashed amid hunt for missing punctuation!
Fair, princess?
- the above contextually irrelevant nonsense provided by the Society for the Prevention of Spoilers; concept shamelessly stolen from the original work entitled “Eats, shoots and leaves” written by SWIM* and published in dead tree format at some point in the past**.
OH WAIT ACTUAL REVIEW REQUIRED?? OK MOTO!
——
In review, I conclude the following:
1) IS BOOK!
2) IS GOOD!!
3) This review is made up of and overall constitutes incontrovertible fact(s) UNTIL AND UNLESS each individual entity who gains comprehension of it chooses to consume the entire work in question (be that visually, aurally, orally or otherwise) AND disagrees AND submits supporting arguments for said disagreement on a postcard to the usual address
——
*”someone who isn’t me”, a phrase endowed with impressive levels of magically reinforced plausible deniability (through repeated use on Teh Interwebs™️ by many and varied authors publicly stating [alleged and/or assumed to be] experientially factual accounts as if purely hypothetical flights of fancy where they otherwise would constitute admission of widely illegal acts) but misleadingly used here in stark literal meaning as a placeholder for my laziness
**yes, I could easily look this up. No, I’m not going to!**** See previous footnote*** regarding “laziness” in reference to the author. Who is allegedly me.
***why, yes! It WOULD have been significantly less effort to search the Oracle (Google, I mean. Less a true Surch Enjinn these days but as we’re talking an item offered for sale its modern incarnation as a Shopping Engine or Mercantile Algorithmic Deceiver is likely as effective if not more so) than to write all them wordles that here is be! But still, NOPE.
****I lied! I looked it up to check the punctuation of the main title (of a book about punctuation) which means I saw and cannot unsee these details. BUT I STILL WON’T TELL YOU BECAUSE REASONS! Also I have the stubborn, and further, find myself hilarious.
Rumours of titular inaccuracy quashed amid hunt for missing punctuation!
Fair, princess?
- the above contextually irrelevant nonsense provided by the Society for the Prevention of Spoilers; concept shamelessly stolen from the original work entitled “Eats, shoots and leaves” written by SWIM* and published in dead tree format at some point in the past**.
OH WAIT ACTUAL REVIEW REQUIRED?? OK MOTO!
——
In review, I conclude the following:
1) IS BOOK!
2) IS GOOD!!
3) This review is made up of and overall constitutes incontrovertible fact(s) UNTIL AND UNLESS each individual entity who gains comprehension of it chooses to consume the entire work in question (be that visually, aurally, orally or otherwise) AND disagrees AND submits supporting arguments for said disagreement on a postcard to the usual address
——
*”someone who isn’t me”, a phrase endowed with impressive levels of magically reinforced plausible deniability (through repeated use on Teh Interwebs™️ by many and varied authors publicly stating [alleged and/or assumed to be] experientially factual accounts as if purely hypothetical flights of fancy where they otherwise would constitute admission of widely illegal acts) but misleadingly used here in stark literal meaning as a placeholder for my laziness
**yes, I could easily look this up. No, I’m not going to!**** See previous footnote*** regarding “laziness” in reference to the author. Who is allegedly me.
***why, yes! It WOULD have been significantly less effort to search the Oracle (Google, I mean. Less a true Surch Enjinn these days but as we’re talking an item offered for sale its modern incarnation as a Shopping Engine or Mercantile Algorithmic Deceiver is likely as effective if not more so) than to write all them wordles that here is be! But still, NOPE.
****I lied! I looked it up to check the punctuation of the main title (of a book about punctuation) which means I saw and cannot unsee these details. BUT I STILL WON’T TELL YOU BECAUSE REASONS! Also I have the stubborn, and further, find myself hilarious.
August 26, 2024
Squirrel is an acrobat in the circus, and rather foul-mouthed, strong-willed, and athletic. She’s also and orphan who has no idea where she’s from. Turns out she’s a lost princess, hence the title of the book. This is *not* a good thing, because for reasons that aren’t immediately clear, her father wants her to stay dead.
Toren is an apprentice mage, with expertise in illusion and suggestion. He’s a teenager and given to pranks. When we first meet him, he’s hiding from classmates who want to give him a thorough beating for things he’s pulled on them.
As you might expect, the two end up on the run together. Squirrel has no real interest in being a princess, but she does want to stay free and alive.
The book is somewhat comical, but ultimately has a hard edge which may be too much for some readers. There is, for example, a scene of attempted rape.
This is one of Macronomicon’s better books to date, and it’s a stand-alone book, not part of a larger series. Both primary characters are interesting and likeable.
My one serious problem with the book is that Toren’s relationship with his family is rather murderous, and there’s no really convincing reason as to why. At one point his mother plots his death, for example. There’s one scene where both his parents come across as psychopaths. Neither is depicted in a consistent way.
Toren is an apprentice mage, with expertise in illusion and suggestion. He’s a teenager and given to pranks. When we first meet him, he’s hiding from classmates who want to give him a thorough beating for things he’s pulled on them.
As you might expect, the two end up on the run together. Squirrel has no real interest in being a princess, but she does want to stay free and alive.
The book is somewhat comical, but ultimately has a hard edge which may be too much for some readers. There is, for example, a scene of attempted rape.
This is one of Macronomicon’s better books to date, and it’s a stand-alone book, not part of a larger series. Both primary characters are interesting and likeable.
My one serious problem with the book is that Toren’s relationship with his family is rather murderous, and there’s no really convincing reason as to why. At one point his mother plots his death, for example. There’s one scene where both his parents come across as psychopaths. Neither is depicted in a consistent way.
January 2, 2024
I really enjoyed this book and can't believe I'm the first to write a review on it - kind of intimidating. I stumbled upon this book a few weeks back and was intrigued by its cover and that the protagonist is a young woman named, of all things, "Squirrel". Squirrel has been raised in a circus since she was found in the woods as a small girl by the owner/ringmaster of a traveling circus.
The adventure starts out with Squirrel's circus in a competition with other acts for the prize of a royal contract, and the opportunity to ask the king's oracle one question. Where other acts are hoping to ask questions seeking fame or fortune, Squirrel is hoping to win so that she can ask the oracle for her true name. When her troupe does win and she gets the opportunity to ask for her true name, the answer she receives throws her life into a tailspin and she finds herself on the run.
What I enjoyed about the book is that Squirrel remains a strong, independent young woman who knows who she is and what she can do and will take no crap from anyone, no matter what their station of life may be.
Even though this book is listed as Fair Princess #1, the story does come to a satisfying conclusion so you don't have to worry about being stuck waiting for book 2 to come out. Just pick it up, read, and enjoy
The adventure starts out with Squirrel's circus in a competition with other acts for the prize of a royal contract, and the opportunity to ask the king's oracle one question. Where other acts are hoping to ask questions seeking fame or fortune, Squirrel is hoping to win so that she can ask the oracle for her true name. When her troupe does win and she gets the opportunity to ask for her true name, the answer she receives throws her life into a tailspin and she finds herself on the run.
What I enjoyed about the book is that Squirrel remains a strong, independent young woman who knows who she is and what she can do and will take no crap from anyone, no matter what their station of life may be.
Even though this book is listed as Fair Princess #1, the story does come to a satisfying conclusion so you don't have to worry about being stuck waiting for book 2 to come out. Just pick it up, read, and enjoy
November 5, 2025
3.25 Stars. Inconsistent pace, plot rails.
By the end of the book, I was on side with Toren the illusionist. He was a well fleshed out character whose insouciance was likeable and his ambitions unquenchable. Squirrel, on the other hand, seemed two dimensional. She feared nothing and always charged into the teeth of the enemy.
When I think about the second act, there's really not much going on. The guild of street children could have been very interesting but little was done with it. Squirrel's reluctant arms instructor seemed ripe for hidden depths and secret sympathies... but nothing happened.
The ending seemed a little rushed. The twist leading to victory was barely set-up and not fully explained. The occasional inclusion of truly stupid enemy agents, was blatantly used to force the plot to its next pivot point.
I enjoyed parts of it (mostly Toren's parts) and coasted through the rest.
By the end of the book, I was on side with Toren the illusionist. He was a well fleshed out character whose insouciance was likeable and his ambitions unquenchable. Squirrel, on the other hand, seemed two dimensional. She feared nothing and always charged into the teeth of the enemy.
When I think about the second act, there's really not much going on. The guild of street children could have been very interesting but little was done with it. Squirrel's reluctant arms instructor seemed ripe for hidden depths and secret sympathies... but nothing happened.
The ending seemed a little rushed. The twist leading to victory was barely set-up and not fully explained. The occasional inclusion of truly stupid enemy agents, was blatantly used to force the plot to its next pivot point.
I enjoyed parts of it (mostly Toren's parts) and coasted through the rest.
March 11, 2024
I've enjoyed enough of this author's books that I'm willing to give his work a try, even when the cover and blurb make me not want to.
This is very, very different compared to the author's competent characters, who use their minds and loopholes in magic to accomplish great feats.
The protagonist has no magic (only a quarter of the book remaining), and is just athletic. Not my interest in protagonists. The story also feels of political intrigue, with some magic thrown in.
I will decide if I will read the sequel when I'm finished.
I finished the book, and I did not expect this. I don't know if i will read the sequel, because I don't see the protag using loopholes to blow stuff up. We will see how that goes.
3/5 Stars
This is very, very different compared to the author's competent characters, who use their minds and loopholes in magic to accomplish great feats.
The protagonist has no magic (only a quarter of the book remaining), and is just athletic. Not my interest in protagonists. The story also feels of political intrigue, with some magic thrown in.
I will decide if I will read the sequel when I'm finished.
I finished the book, and I did not expect this. I don't know if i will read the sequel, because I don't see the protag using loopholes to blow stuff up. We will see how that goes.
3/5 Stars
October 8, 2024
Well, this is a delightful story, full of surprises to the very end.
The MC, Squirrel is a circus acrobat who turns out to be much more than expected. When she crosses paths with a noble wizard that's a senior in the academy, interesting things happen. Turns out the wizard is a chaos magnet and the academy's headmaster assigns him a senior project that has him working with Squirrel.
I really enjoyed reading this. The insights into the thinking (or lack thereof) of people from those of noble birth to gutter snipes as they stumble about was sadly amusing. I dont know if there will be a sequel to this story but I really enjoyed reading it.
The MC, Squirrel is a circus acrobat who turns out to be much more than expected. When she crosses paths with a noble wizard that's a senior in the academy, interesting things happen. Turns out the wizard is a chaos magnet and the academy's headmaster assigns him a senior project that has him working with Squirrel.
I really enjoyed reading this. The insights into the thinking (or lack thereof) of people from those of noble birth to gutter snipes as they stumble about was sadly amusing. I dont know if there will be a sequel to this story but I really enjoyed reading it.
October 11, 2024
NOT Sleeping Beauty
This has adult stuff like attempted rape and death. There are real evil people in this story. Other than that, I liked the book, and it has a good ending, but a lot is not fully explained. I would read a sequel. This is best described as a dark fairy tale with some bloody violence and other real things like beggars and corruption of officials. Not my favorite but the world building was interesting with a unique twist on magic that I would like to see more of.
This has adult stuff like attempted rape and death. There are real evil people in this story. Other than that, I liked the book, and it has a good ending, but a lot is not fully explained. I would read a sequel. This is best described as a dark fairy tale with some bloody violence and other real things like beggars and corruption of officials. Not my favorite but the world building was interesting with a unique twist on magic that I would like to see more of.
August 22, 2024
shortly ridiculous
Or ridiculously short. Meh. Funny either way. Classic fantasy tropes looped around on themselves.
Bit of a warning: one of the bad guys attempts r@p3. There’s also some animal cruelty and general nastiness. All in character and consistent with feudalism, so it’s not just gratuitous violence.
Or ridiculously short. Meh. Funny either way. Classic fantasy tropes looped around on themselves.
Bit of a warning: one of the bad guys attempts r@p3. There’s also some animal cruelty and general nastiness. All in character and consistent with feudalism, so it’s not just gratuitous violence.
September 14, 2024
Snuck up on me
I wasn’t expecting much when I downloaded this, except to say I thoroughly enjoyed this authors other books. Turned out to be a page turner. One that I didn’t want to end. I kept looking at the % complete ticking up with disappointment. Story was great. Dialog was great. Characters were awesome. I hope there’s another coming soon!
I wasn’t expecting much when I downloaded this, except to say I thoroughly enjoyed this authors other books. Turned out to be a page turner. One that I didn’t want to end. I kept looking at the % complete ticking up with disappointment. Story was great. Dialog was great. Characters were awesome. I hope there’s another coming soon!
September 16, 2024
Hopefully, there will be a book 2!
Here’s hoping this is the start of a series!. Book 1 was a delightful read. The plot is engaging and interesting; the characters are creative; and the writing creates a world into which you become a part of on page 1 and never want to leave. Looking forward to more!
Here’s hoping this is the start of a series!. Book 1 was a delightful read. The plot is engaging and interesting; the characters are creative; and the writing creates a world into which you become a part of on page 1 and never want to leave. Looking forward to more!
January 26, 2025
Tad disjointed
This one had some fun bits to it, but definitely felt more disjointed than other by the same author.
The AI cover almost stopped me, but i still commited because everything else I've read from this author is usually great! This one just didn't have the same power or flow.
This one had some fun bits to it, but definitely felt more disjointed than other by the same author.
The AI cover almost stopped me, but i still commited because everything else I've read from this author is usually great! This one just didn't have the same power or flow.
February 13, 2025
interesting
Nothing revolutionary here, but it was different.
Solid editing.
An interesting read.
This book comes to a solid conclusion at a good ending point . It does leave things open, so that sequel could be written, but if the sequel is ever written, it’ll still be OK and you won’t feel annoyed.
Nothing revolutionary here, but it was different.
Solid editing.
An interesting read.
This book comes to a solid conclusion at a good ending point . It does leave things open, so that sequel could be written, but if the sequel is ever written, it’ll still be OK and you won’t feel annoyed.
November 10, 2024
fun shift on the fairytale trope
Good stuff. Characters are unique and distinct. No one does anything that would make you disassociate from the story, and it's all wrapped up in a nice bow that could stay a self contained story or branch off into a new series. Recommend
Good stuff. Characters are unique and distinct. No one does anything that would make you disassociate from the story, and it's all wrapped up in a nice bow that could stay a self contained story or branch off into a new series. Recommend
August 30, 2024
Wonderful
This title was absolutely delightful. I'm honestly sad there isn't a book two for me to dive into. It really feels like a pause.
This title was absolutely delightful. I'm honestly sad there isn't a book two for me to dive into. It really feels like a pause.
September 10, 2024
Изневерявайки на типичния си стил и сюжет, Macronomicon ни представя една по-типична фентъзи-новела, където е извел гърл-пауъра до малко абсурдни висини. Нищо особено, но става за четене.
October 8, 2025
I really need a sequel here...
March 19, 2026
Got to page 9
So much unneeded vulgarity I didn't read further. Not everyone likes f bombs and girls talking like a sewer. Hard pass.
So much unneeded vulgarity I didn't read further. Not everyone likes f bombs and girls talking like a sewer. Hard pass.
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews