Learning to Lament

by Paul Mallard

Genres: Grief

188 pages, Paperback

Published January 8, 2024

Reviews

[Sarah Morgan]

It took me two years to read this book, not bc it was bad but bc lamenting is hard - esp when it’s new. I used to be paralyzed by sadness, but this book gave me words for grief when I had none && showed me how to move forward in darkness towards hope, community, and comfort 🤍

Sadness ≠ despair
Sadness > lament > draw near to God in comfort

[Noah Mozingo]

Review of Learning to Lament, by Paul Mallard
https://www.unionpublishing.org/produ...
I recommend this book to you as a wonderful pastorally sensitive work on learning to grieve well!

Is it permissible to grieve? And how do we do it?
Paul Mallard answers these questions and more in Learning to Lament. Paul pastorally works through the difficulties of learning how to grieve in a Christ-like way. Lamentation is an expression of faith (p.17), and Paul seeks to help his readers learn to express their faith in lamentation well.

Paul is honest throughout this book. He interweaves his own stories, and the stories of Biblical characters, into a theological tapestry of lament. Lament strengthens our “theological grasp,” Paul writes, “But it is a theology forged in the fires of affliction” (p.79).

With this God, there is room to feel pain and voice our griefs (p.15). “The Bible allows us to be honest. It gives us permission to lament … Today, we live between Eden and the new creation, and this place is a vale of tears” (p.16-17). And our Heavenly Father is the One we need to rely on to live and grieve well in this vale.

There are a growing number of books on lamentation today, but this one stands out as an honest, pastoral work. It is worth reading, if not immediately for yourself, then for someone you know who is experiencing grief and loss. I do have issues with content on page 83, but outside of that one page, it is a theologically solid book. I recommend it to you for your good and joy!

Learning to Lament, by Paul Mallard.
8/10 recommend
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⚫️⚫️

You can also find a thread of my highlights from the book here: https://x.com/sbgb19/status/173786773...

[Melissa Grant-Peters]

This book has a good premise and sets the scene well for why lament is needed and why it is Biblical. Each chapter was more or less like a sermon, both in structure or in content - exploring mainly one Biblical passage and drawing conclusions from it for application. While pastoral considerations about lament made a lot of sense and were explored well, I found the theological depth lacking. Some of the conclusions drawn were tenuous at best or plainly speculatory. An example is the comment that the author of Psalm 88 found his way after a period of dark lament and back to God after writing the Psalm because it was later used by the sons of Korah as music. This was unnecessary, the evidence is lacking and puts into question the legitimacy of other important statements.
Moreover, certain difficult theological topics were treated as obvious whilst not acknowledging the multitude of views. An example is in Chapter 8 when the author claims that we know for certain that after death our souls join God in bliss until our bodies are resurrected and our souls are merged with our new restored bodies, extrapolating even further that this was what happened to Jesus following his death on the cross, quoting as evidence for this Luke 23:38-43. This interpretation is only one of many, and ignores even other Biblical passages such as 1 Peter 3:18-20 which provide an alternative interpretation.
Ultimately, the goal set out by this book is a very relevant and it is candidly written by a man who has experienced and seen a great deal of lament in his lifetime. I just wish that it were more honest about sections which are personal interpretations or speculations.

[Hannah]

Lament is not a word we use often, but this author illustrates that it isn't an outdated concept, indeed it is something all Christians ought to be familiar with. This book isn't just for those grieving a loved one, although it is a great book for that. This book is a book about prayer, but specifically in times of trial and struggle. It is a book for every believer, because no Christian is exempt from trials. Even in times of abundance there is much to gain from learning to lament - be it preparation for future trials, or equipping oneself to come alongside others in our lives suffering great loss.

Throughout the book the author reminds us that in all things we rest our heads on 3 pillows - God is sovereign, good, and wise. These three truths about who God is are enough to sustain us throughout our pilgrimage on this earth.


It is another accessible and practical book from Union Publishing that keeps scripture at the centre. There are passages from the bible to study at the end of each chapter to dig deeper and further reflect on what is being taught.

[Frank Peters]

The book covers a topic that is too often neglected in the church. Conveniently (for me), I went to a talk while reading the book on the Psalms of Lament and found great agreement between book and speaker. The book does a good job in being sensitive to those who are grieving and thus should be lamenting. It also does a good job giving people permission to lament as expressions of their faith in God. This was valuable. The book is not perfect and presumes too much from its audience. But it does provide a valuable correction for too many churches who imply that the Christian life should always be happy and carefree.

[Emily]

This is a gentle, honest and practical book about navigating grief and practising lament. Each chapter contains real life examples to help you understand the varied experiences of loss and grief, Scripture explained clearly and applied with pastoral sensitivity, and questions for discussion or reflection to lead you to the Lord, in fellowship with others. I am grateful to have read it at a time when friends are grieving, as it's made me more aware of what grief does, and helped me see the goodness of lament.

[Phil Butcher]

Such a helpful book in giving us a Biblical framework and pratice to lament our losses and hurts in life. The first few chapters are excellent & I'd encourage every Christian to read. The last few, although still good, I found a little repetitative. 4/5

[S.D. (Davy) Ellison]

Mallard offers a rather circuitous treatment of lament, leaning more towards a book on suffering more generally rather than lament explicitly. This breadth was helpful, though. As was the Christological focus. There are better books on lament but this is good on suffering.

[Chloe Abraham]

Was helpful at a very difficult time.