Stolen Tomorrows: Understanding and Treating Women's Childhood Sexual Abuse

by Steven Levenkron, Steven Levenkron

From the psychotherapist who offered groundbreaking work on self-mutilation, an examination of the psychology of victims of sexual abuse. Acclaimed psychotherapist Steven Levenkron's Stolen Tomorrows is a breakthrough book that will encourage the 30 percent of women who have been abused to think about, talk about, and seek help for what has been their secret shame. It illustrates the emotional and psychological devastation inflicted on young girls when they experience childhood sexual abuse, exploring varied situations and settings in which this abuse takes place, focusing on the child's experiences at the time of the assault, as well as the emotional, behavioral, and psychological problems that emerge in adolescence and adulthood. A common theme emerges in therapy sessions: self-hatred, low self-esteem, fearfulness, and an abiding sense of personal debasement. But this book offers an uplifting message. In addition to giving therapists and other helpers an empathic insight, Stolen Tomorrows will enable the survivor to recognize herself in both her personal history and her current struggle to overcome the legacy of abuse.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Abuse

224 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2007

Reviews

[Amy Bruestle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sad book, but very relatable and helped me to not feel alone. Helped me to understand what is going on in my own mind and why i feel some of the things that I feel. Glad I decided to read it!

[Vicki Hopkins · Rating 4 out of 5]

I ordered this book to gain a better understanding of my own past, having been sexually abused when I was five years old by a teenage neighbor. I'm in the process of writing my experience into another novel, which I plan to publish under a pen name - lest I shock my current fans - that integrates my mental and behavioral experiences as a result of that abuse into a fiction element.

I've been searching for books to read on sexual abuse, so I ordered this one. Though I have sought some counseling myself over my past (I'm now 62), I found this book a confirmation in many ways of my eschewed thought patterns I've wrestled with throughout my life. The only factor that bothered me is that I've never suffered from bulimia, anorexia, or cutting myself, nor have I purposely sought out physically abusive relationships (only fantasized over such).

However, to say that my sexual violation has not changed my personality since I was five or driven my patterns of thinking into unhealthy attitudes and low self-esteem, would be a lie. It's one thing to understand some of the more dangerous and hurtful behaviors directed toward self as a result, but I think the psychological effects of abuse, without all the other physical manifestations, are just as debilitating, such as self-hatred, shyness, depression, inability to accept love, inability to trust men, not being able to stand up for yourself or say no...the list is endless.

The case studies were interesting and more of a validation that what I've faced as a result of my abuse is typical of others, as well. To coin a line in the infamous best seller right now about a man abused as a child, all I can is, "I don't know any other way...this is who I am." For some reason, I found that comforting. I didn't ask to be cast into this mold. It was forced upon me.

[Shelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

My therapist recommended this book to help me see that events from the past can still affect me. It was eye-opening to recognize myself and my actions in some of the case studies presented. It really forces me to stop denying the influences of the past on the present. I understand (at least intellectually, if not emotionally) now why I push people away and why I have always been fearful and anxiety ridden. The author also writes extensively on the connections between what happened and cutting and bulimia--my two most obvious "maladaptive" behaviors. This was a difficult book to read, but worth the effort. I haven't necessarily made the emotional connections yet, but it has given me a place to start.

[Barbara Whittaker · Rating 4 out of 5]

One of the best explanations available of the damage that sexual abuse causes. Amazing eye-opener to the damage so many people carry around in the wake of abuse, often unknowingly, as it wreaks havoc in their lives. A must read for the whole human race.

[Ron Moss · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good for professionals

Straightforward in layman's terms but good for professionals too on an topic that demands more attention. I learned a lot. As a therapist I learned the value of slowing down and I was reminded just how brutal a crime this is. This is a very tricky area to consider and good judgment and experience counts.

[Robert Więckowski · Rating 4 out of 5]

For me, the book is a 4-star read.

[Jada Roche · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mostly case histories of a similar nature, this book didn't provide any insight, but rather seems built more for psych students looking for an introduction. The details in the case histories felt at time invasive, and did not lead to any type of conclusion that could be of any help. that said, I really didn't "see" myself in this book and so it wasn't as helpful as I thought it might be.

[Rachel · Rating 3 out of 5]

Although this was a very difficult book to read at times it was quite informative and interesting for those in the mental health field who might come across clients in these specific areas. Not only did the book tell their stories but also walked you through what the clinician was doing to help the client.

[Les · Rating 3 out of 5]

This could have been rather graphic and sensational--but Dr. Levenkron skillfully avoided that angle. These girls' stories are truly heartbreaking. The book gives a hopeful outlook for women who have this in their past. Dull reading, but useful information.

[danielle · Rating 1 out of 5]

I wish I could give this extremely heterosexist, sexist, hopeless book negative stars. Reading the author blame childhood sexual abuse for a masculine/butch gender presentation (and indicating such a presentation can "soften" with therapy was was nauseating. Not in anyway helpful or hopeful.

[Mike · Rating 4 out of 5]

A book about the sad reality this world faces.

[Chubz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautiful Book. A lot of true information in it.

[till · Rating 4 out of 5]

good book with useful case studies, his analysis seems slightly simplistic.