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Gentlewoman: Etiquette for a Lady, from a Gentleman

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Uneasy lies the head that wears a crown... Have you ever witnessed a Lady? Not a woman, but a Lady. She's a girl by birth, woman by maturity and Lady by choice. Do you remember how the sight of a Lady made you feel? Did she smile at you? Could you feel her warmth? Do you remember her scent of comfort and truth? Can you recall how difficult it was explaining what you witnessed when she strolled by? Her high heels were music; her stride was a song. She walked in greatness influencing nations with each step. Do you remember the first time you saw a Lady? Well, when was the last time you saw her? Her story isn't being told. Her legacy is being watered down and society is taking notes. She's much more than a victim with hips. "GENTLEWOMAN" sets out to explore the demise of femininity and class in contemporary society. Unlike any other book, the author shares a lifetime of relevant research and insight that will inform, educate and empower womanhood. The book is fresh, fun and sexy uncommon sense advice designed to facilitate a necessary conversation amongst the sexes that leads to real solutions. Oh, and a man wrote it! CLASS IS BACK IN SESSION! "From selecting wines to selecting a mate, I am re-branding etiquette. Making manners beautiful, again." -E.B. II

306 pages, Paperback

First published December 17, 2013

141 people are currently reading
1265 people want to read

About the author

Enitan O. Bereola II

5 books25 followers

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5 stars
312 (51%)
4 stars
142 (23%)
3 stars
86 (14%)
2 stars
34 (5%)
1 star
27 (4%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 56 reviews
Profile Image for ☘Misericordia☘ ⚡ϟ⚡⛈⚡☁ ❇️❤❣.
2,531 reviews19.2k followers
March 24, 2019
Q:
Feminine.
Rare.
Legendary.
You. (c)
Q:
Wear your crown. (c)
Q:
Spoiler Alert: You win (c)

Love the idea and concept and delivery. Some stuff bold, the rest of it pretty self-evident but largely forgotten by contemporaries.
Empowering, what else can I say?
* The part on flatulence ('emitting odors from the anus').... SERIOUSLY?

Q:
And while she’s delighting in taking your man, go ahead and give her your shoes, too–she’ll be walking in them. It’s been said that if a woman steals your man, there’s no better revenge than letting her keep him. (c)
Q:
I can provide clarity from an unbiased perspective. I can get you to love yourself more, and men and women to love each other better. I can encourage you on your journey and at your pit stops. I can provide balance. I don’t want to change you. I want to add to you. You’ll willingly change for yourself. (c)
Q:
Chivalry isn’t about male dominance. In the 21st century, chivalry should just mean honoring the opposite sex. In relationships, chivalry shows a mutual respect for your partner. In everyday life, chivalry strengthens men and women’s relations. ... Courteous behavior isn’t limited to men. Chivalry is for Ladies, too. (c)
Q:
Rule n° 47 If you think being single sucks, it’s because you do. When you can’t stand your own company, no one else will either. Fall in love with yourself first. (c)
Q:
Love people and use things. Don’t use people and love things. (c)
Q:
Rule n° 67 Pet Control: There’s a dog in my neighborhood whose owner thinks our lawn is a toilet. If I ever catch them two in action…well, let’s just say, they wouldn’t like it if I walked in their living room, grabbed a newspaper and helped myself to a bowel movement on their carpet. Sounds disgusting, right? (c)
Q:
The best way to misunderstand someone is through text messaging ... It’s far too obvious to state that texting while driving is dangerous, but what about texting while dating? (c)
Q:
keyboard courage can get you killed. (с)
Q:
To seek validation is to give people and things permission to determine your value. You must acknowledge and walk in your own splendor. Confidence isn’t based upon compliments. (c)
Q:
Your life is your own, and it’s specifically designed to be lived by you. (c)
Q:
Women who fit in hardly stand out. Celebrate authenticity and unapologetically be you. (c)
Q:
It doesn’t matter your story; breathing is a sign of worthiness.

The whore is as worthy as the queen. Don’t allow society’s judgment to confuse you. God’s truth is often the world’s fiction. Acting on your sexual desires doesn’t decrease your worth. You can’t ride your way from God’s love. The One who designed you determined your value. Greater than nature’s beauty, sunsets, oceans and waterfalls, you are God’s masterpiece. You’re far more beautiful than the Mona Lisa or Mozart’s music. Now act like it. Don’t let little lies grant access to your lovely life. Your value can’t be diminished by your life choices. God’s love isn’t conditional. You’re always worthy. It’s up to you to accept this. It’s impossible to believe in God without believing what He says about you. (c)
Q:
Insecurity is known to penetrate through any level of confidence. The voice that ruins most dreams is your own. Wounds heal, but unresolved issues don’t - Don’t be scared to get scarred. Stare at your scars until they become beautiful. They’re reminders. You’re only a victim if you don’t get back up. Don’t let anyone or anything take your power. (c)
Q:
Pretty might open doors, but intellect lets you in – Don’t be stuck outside with your pretty ass. (c)
Q:
Pretty is what you are, but beauty is what you do with it. Have you ever been to a highly promoted party that ended up being completely empty inside? Well, that’s what it’s like when you’re sexy but dumb. It’s similar to the anticipation built up from an amazing movie trailer, only for the movie to be a complete disappointment. A pretty face is cool, but the mind is God’s masterpiece. You become boring when you’re unaccompanied by intellect. At this point, being smart is cuter than being cute. What you look like will never be as important as what you do. Be so good that you can’t be ignored. You’re here for an instant. What will you do with that time? (c)
Q:
You can keep your cute. We prefer an awe-inspiring soul. (c)
Q:
Over time, your mind and spirit stand out more than your long hair and lipstick. Congratulations if you have all four. (c)
Q:
You’re not a doll. If you were to get a knife and cut a doll’s head off, you would find no brain inside. If you were to make a small incision on the doll’s chest, there would be no soul. A human lacking these two vital components is in a severe vegetative state. You’re a living, breathing manifestation of the most compelling dimension of life. (c)
Q:
Ephesians 2:10 says she’s God’s masterpiece…but she still searches for likes on online. (c)
Q:
If someone needs clarification and asks you to be more “Pacific,” kindly direct that person to the ocean…and tell that person to jump. (c)
Q:
Some of us may be crazy, but we’re not nuts and you damn sure can’t crack us open. Ladies, never attempt to pry or force communication out of a man. The results are similar to prying out teeth, no anesthesia. Be more patient with us, love us harder and show us that we can count on you. (c)
Q:
Partnerships are useless with no connection. Communication is cable, the remote, the receiver and sound system. (c)
Q:
While it’s true that many men prefer a Lady with an edge, we don’t want her falling off the ledge. Life is a balancing act. (с)
Q:
You’re still here. You still have a purpose. Mornings are a beautiful reminder of that. Stop what you’re doing, close your eyes, hear yourself breathe and say thank you. Focus and allow your joy to flow. Let your mind be at ease and get your clarity. Do this daily. (c)
Q:
Using your breasts as your purse is poor public etiquette, but I’m sure perverts don’t mind watching. (c)
Q:
The gentlewoman way.
Here’s your crown. (c)
Profile Image for Kimberly Badal.
15 reviews
September 19, 2014
This book came to me at a time when I had forgotten I even owned a crown. I kept dropping my standards and "adjusting" because I was once told that my standards are too high. They are not. This book reminded me that i have a lot to offer therefore I should expect a lot in return. Every page brought a reminder or a new lesson. This book will definitely be a staple, venturing with me wherever I go - because it is a constant reminder to wear my crown and continue to be amazing.First book that I've put highlighter to other than my bible ....Off to buy copies for all my girlfriends !
Profile Image for Theresa Clark.
1 review1 follower
March 7, 2014
Amazing book. Easily digested. Well written and very uplifting. I loved that it embraced being a woman and the beauty of it. Will read again and highly recommended to any and everyone.
Profile Image for Shu.
14 reviews
January 28, 2014
This was a lovely book. It was uplifting and the content was beautiful. I want to give this book as a gift to all of the women in my life, to remind them to that they are honored and revered. As the author repeats, "pick up your crown" ladies.
Profile Image for LaStephanie.
92 reviews1 follower
March 2, 2017
This book was totally amazing and uplifting. I really understand the concept of being the Gentlewoman that I am. Kudos to Mr. Bereola putting together this beautiful love letter to all Gentlewomen. I can read this over and over again.
Profile Image for Sharon L.
600 reviews95 followers
April 15, 2018
It had some good points, however, there was too much spiritual and religious talk for my taste.

also, I would have loved more things about the etiquette (mainly social).

oh well
Profile Image for Literary Chic.
226 reviews3 followers
September 21, 2016
I don't really believe in self help books. However, when I saw an etiquette book for women written by a man I had to read it. (Granted, I had all the enthusiasm of a teenager sitting through a parental lecture. I may have actually rolled my eyes when I heard its author was masculine.)

I didn't discover anything revolutionary in this book but I did enjoy hearing old principles from a modern man's perspective. Although there's nothing new in this read, the author wasn't preachy and relayed good points. He made allowances for the hyper feminists and those of us who quite like our time honored gender roles. (Sorry feminists, I'm from the South. We like chivalry and being "ma'am-ed" isn't about age down here.)

Additionally, Mr. Bereola gave me a new quote I can't wait to use. "Thinking like a man is a waste of a woman."
Profile Image for Aretha Love.
4 reviews1 follower
June 21, 2016
I read the book, and decided to rate the book somewhere between 3 or 4. Ultimately I rated the book a four.. The fact that the writer spoke for "God" throughout the book just screamed delusional, to me! With that being said; I appreciate his perspective. He gave a lot of positive feed back. Which was refreshing, since women are often seen as just sex objects and nothing more, these days. It was wonderful to read that our worth is noticed and appreciated. Not only that; the writer reminded us, women that we are all a queen in our own right. I did indeed enjoyed the book, even though I was not too sealed on all the bible quotes. Nevertheless; his message was well received. Thank you for the reminder. I needed to hear your wise words. Very uplifting, I must say!
Profile Image for Amber.
61 reviews22 followers
May 20, 2014
I think Bereola achieved the goal he set for this book; to reiterate an uplifting message to women from a mans view. His no-nonsense personality showed through his words, and I appreciated his candid presentation. I gave this book three stars because I felt that the theme he wanted to portray was class, elegance and sophistication for the modern woman, but the doodles, lipstick mark and bulky 'B' on every page cheapened the experience for me. Also, there were a surprising number of grammatical errors. Overall I appreciated this book and his honesty.
Profile Image for Sasha.
22 reviews13 followers
July 22, 2015
This book had me in tears many times because it showed me how amazing of a Gentlewoman I am. It's nice to know men value and respect our role as a woman. This book truly uplifted my spirit, help me develop even more self-love for myself. Great and funny tips for all woman in various situations to read.
12 reviews1 follower
December 1, 2014
Gentlewoman: Etiquette for a Lady, from a Man is the second best seller by author Enitan Bereola II. Gentlewoman is a female empowerment book written for women, but also suitable for men. This book is a favorite of mine and an easy read. It is a compilation of Bereolas own words, thoughts, and experiences; as well as quotes and sayings from people such as Brian-Michael Cox and John Legend. Bereola does an amazing job with the use of voice in this book. He definitely wrote with his audience in mind and the book reads a way that comes across similar to chatting with your girl friends. As I read this book for the second time I walked away with the same experience. Reading gentlewoman it feels like Bereola is speaking specifically to you. There is no question that Bereola is passionate about the topic of women in today’s society.
I would use Bereola’s story of how his father locked his three-year-old brother in the car as a minilesson to teach about using descriptive words. Bereola used phrases like “Inconvenient drops of warm, salt-soaked sweat” and “frantically searched.” I could also use this passage for a minilesson on similes. In the story Bereola uses a variety of similes: “The car interior was like an oven” and “The texture in his voice was like sandpaper.”
Profile Image for Courtney CJ.
26 reviews5 followers
July 8, 2015
For my overall rating of the book I teetered between a 3 and 4-star rating, ultimately leaning towards the 4 because I like the intention of the book. I could not give it a 5 because I was looking forward to being "on fire" after I read the book, and it did not happen. This is partially because for some segments of the book I felt as though I was back in my high school health course. I think it would be great if there was a gentlewoman edition for younger ladies and then an addition that leaned more towards the "grown and sexy". Overall, I did pick up some great information and will apply some of his suggestions to my personal life. I would read future works from this author.
2 reviews
February 24, 2015
You will like this book if you are a modern, religious, and curious woman trying to learn more about etiquette and love. There are great insights and the author brings in advice from other people that is helpful. Overall a good book with witty humor... that is helpful just as it is funny. I love the section with all the "Pleasantries" rules. Sidenote: Just because the author is a man, it does not take away from his respectful tone. Best way to sell is to read the dedication page! It is truly beautiful.
7 reviews
November 12, 2015
Manners matter

I liked this book because it is an etiquette book for life in general, not just for romantic relationships. I gave the book 4 stars because my copy didn't have all the rules listed. (There's a section with rules) I'm not sure if my copy didn't download properly or if it is a print error. Either way, I highly recommend this book to men and women of any age group. I think there is great advice sprinkled throughout the pages. Also, the author's voice is conversational which makes the book easy to read.
2 reviews
July 21, 2014
Gentlewoman is like receiving wisdom from an older, witty brother!! Majority of the book I could totally relate to because of the values my parents and taught me. I like that he encourages women to empower each other. I also thought it was cool that he talks about different things like wineries, art galleries, and tailored style. Very well written and rounded book, that would be a great gift for a girlfriend or young woman.
Profile Image for Jeimy Matos.
1 review
March 18, 2015
Amazing

Anyone who sees this book at a quick glance would most likely say "I need to be taught manners, get out of here" although I've been raised in a household where values & etiquette has been implemented, it is great to read being a young adult. Many things I've forgotten, others are new. The beauty of this book is that it's not entirely step by step. It helps keep an open mind, that alone changes "our reality," thank you for the reminder. I appreciate you!

-Jeimy
2 reviews
August 8, 2015
For the modern women, this book is an excellent source of encouragement for cultivating not only etiquette but also self-love/compassion.

The one disappointment that I can name is the poor editing (comma displacement, articles missing, word misspellings). As a Literature major, I view the presence of the latter mentioned mistakes as being a disservice to the reader.

Otherwise, Bereola's book is a good read.
Profile Image for Jesswhite0217.
2 reviews
March 2, 2018
I was gifted this book by a very close friends that happens to see me through EVERY trouble I find myself enduring. It was gifted for my 21st birthday during the worse break up ever.
I read the book twice, even used it as the first book for my start-up book club. I enjoyed the book more while I was heartbroken. The second two readings were not as impact. Nonetheless, I enjoyed the book and would recommend it to others.
Profile Image for Gbemisola Ero -Phillips.
3 reviews
November 26, 2014
Amazing

I first saw excerpts of this book on Instagram and just fell in love with the book. It's amazing that a man knows so much about being a lady and is willing to share. It's not just etiquette, it's how to navigate life gracefully, and be who exactly God has called us to be- light and salt of the world. Thank you Bereola
Profile Image for Alonda Williams.
32 reviews2 followers
November 4, 2016
I don't think I will ever be "finished " with this book. It is the type of book that you read and re read and refer to others . It is a reference book, an inspirational book as well as an instructional manual.

What a great love letter to women to remind us to adjust our crowns and to never lower our standards .

I loved everything about this book.
6 reviews2 followers
April 20, 2016
I get where this book is coming from - and think it might help some women....just not me. It's basically a book of affirmations. Maybe if I read this in my younger years, specifically early 20's, it would make more sense to me and I would have enjoyed it more. But now I am in my mid 30's and have a good handle of who I am and don't need a stranger in a book to tell me I am beautiful.
Profile Image for Augmante Alisauskaite.
7 reviews3 followers
August 1, 2016
Every woman has to read it. We are special and we should not only know it but also use it. Everything depends on us...
22 reviews1 follower
February 8, 2017
Did not finished book but very obvious it was written from a man perspective of how they think it should be...
Profile Image for Tiana.
2 reviews
July 23, 2019
I found this book originally on Instagram from a friends posting of it. I had no background history of the author or what the book was about but the mere fact that it was a mans perspective of how he thinks a woman should carry herself, which being single I was super intrigued. Little did I know that my WHOLE crown would be adjusted! For some women confidence is hard in a world that makes us feel like we have to be prim and proper in societies rules of etiquette. Becoming a gentlewoman is hard when you've been told so many things from guys who have put you down from all angles, and to have a man of distinctive character be REAL and help women adjust their crown from the perspective of a gentlemen saying "Don't question your worth because you don't get the same kind of attention another woman gets. Some men only go after what's EASILY attainable. Perhaps you wouldn't want that kind of attention..." That's a gem all by itself in knowing your worth, watering and living on your own green turf. Mr. Bereolaesque this book is a 100% MUST HAVE for any book shelf a woman is building. Thank you for this written gem!
Profile Image for Samin.
8 reviews3 followers
April 27, 2022
با خوندن عنوان کتاب اینجوری بودم که چرا یه مرد باید رفتار و شکل برخورد رو به زن دیکته کنه؟! ولی خب با این حال تصمیم گرفتم بخونمش.
دقیقا کتاب با جواب دادن به همین سوال من شروع شده بود و از این که نویسنده ذهنم رو خونده بود خنده‌ام گرفت.
با این که کتاب نسبتا طولانیه اما لحن صمیمی نویسنده باعث میشه خسته نشی.
اگر در رابطه با اتیکت می‌خواین بیشتر بدونین کتاب خوبی برای شروع هستش.
هر چند نویسنده به نظر مذهبی میاد و اینو توی بخش‌های مختلف کتاب متوجه میشید. طرز فکر سنتی‌ای در رابطه با «رابطه» داره که شاید خیلی باهاش موافق نبودم اما فارغ از این بحث در مجموع کتاب بدی نیست.
Profile Image for Candace.
1 review
September 16, 2018
Not what I was expecting. There were only a few good points made. The length of this book could have been easily cut in half; at times it seems like the author is ranting. Reading this book was a waste of my time and money since I already knew the majority of what this book covers.
Profile Image for Khadijah.
36 reviews1 follower
March 15, 2023
An okay read with a few words of wisdom on how to carry yourself as a lady, words to use and mannerisms. It wasn't anything life changing or bad, repackaged information that serves as gentle reminder to stand up and standout.
Profile Image for Isabella Crowe.
24 reviews
February 1, 2024
It was an ok book. I was hoping for a book on etiquette but this is more about self love. If you are seeking reassurance, I definitely would recommend. It also had some cussing which I didn’t enjoy. I was not pleased overall with it.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 56 reviews

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