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Christian and Divorced: What the Bible REALLY Says About Divorce & Remarriage
When it comes to divorce and remarriage, the fundamentalist Christian logic often goes something like this: You are never allowed to divorce—unless adultery (a term whose definition is hotly debated) has occurred. This means that physical, emotional, or any other form of abuse is not considered a valid reason for divorce:
"I don't think the Bible allows divorce and remarriage ever while the spouse is living. That's my radical, crazy, conservative, narrow, hard-nosed, very needed view in our divorce-happy culture." (Pastor John Piper)
"Without exception, divorce is a product of sin, and God hates it. He never commands it, endorses it or blesses it." (Pastor John MacArthur)
Similarly, when it comes to remarriage, the fundamentalist rule is that you are only free to remarry if your ex-spouse dies. This perspective often leads to victims of abuse being "punished" for escaping their abusers, damning them to solitary and without the opportunity to find love again—a conclusion that directly conflicts with the spirit of Genesis 2:18.
The fundamentalist divorce-remarriage theology is not only flawed and has damaged the lives of many individuals but is also rooted in a misinterpretation of what the Bible truly teaches about divorce and remarriage.
In reality, however, Moses’ divorce permission and Jesus’ teachings in the New Testament do not contradict. Unfortunately, the fundamentalist confusion surrounding divorce and remarriage stems from misunderstandings of ancient Jewish customs, like the AGUNAH, and a few flawed English Bible translations, such as the famous "God hates divorce," a mistranslation of the Hebrew Malachi 2:16. The fundamentalist misinterpretations, widely believed in various conservative Catholic and Protestant denominations in America, have been used to condemn divorce as an inexcusable sin, ignoring its original purpose: to protect those in the marriage!
This concise book explores what the Bible truly says about divorce and remarriage, uncovering the original Hebrew and Greek meanings often lost in translation. By diving deep into the cultural and biblical context, this book offers a fresh, liberating perspective that challenges popular misconceptions.
If you’ve been divorced, are going through a divorce, or are questioning whether God views you with anger or whether He allows remarriage, I promise this concise book will bring you clarity and freedom!
The book is divided into three main parts:
Part I: Divorce & Remarriage in the Old Testament
Part II: Divorce & Remarriage in the New Testament
Part III: Divorce & Remarriage According to Rationality
"I don't think the Bible allows divorce and remarriage ever while the spouse is living. That's my radical, crazy, conservative, narrow, hard-nosed, very needed view in our divorce-happy culture." (Pastor John Piper)
"Without exception, divorce is a product of sin, and God hates it. He never commands it, endorses it or blesses it." (Pastor John MacArthur)
Similarly, when it comes to remarriage, the fundamentalist rule is that you are only free to remarry if your ex-spouse dies. This perspective often leads to victims of abuse being "punished" for escaping their abusers, damning them to solitary and without the opportunity to find love again—a conclusion that directly conflicts with the spirit of Genesis 2:18.
The fundamentalist divorce-remarriage theology is not only flawed and has damaged the lives of many individuals but is also rooted in a misinterpretation of what the Bible truly teaches about divorce and remarriage.
In reality, however, Moses’ divorce permission and Jesus’ teachings in the New Testament do not contradict. Unfortunately, the fundamentalist confusion surrounding divorce and remarriage stems from misunderstandings of ancient Jewish customs, like the AGUNAH, and a few flawed English Bible translations, such as the famous "God hates divorce," a mistranslation of the Hebrew Malachi 2:16. The fundamentalist misinterpretations, widely believed in various conservative Catholic and Protestant denominations in America, have been used to condemn divorce as an inexcusable sin, ignoring its original purpose: to protect those in the marriage!
This concise book explores what the Bible truly says about divorce and remarriage, uncovering the original Hebrew and Greek meanings often lost in translation. By diving deep into the cultural and biblical context, this book offers a fresh, liberating perspective that challenges popular misconceptions.
If you’ve been divorced, are going through a divorce, or are questioning whether God views you with anger or whether He allows remarriage, I promise this concise book will bring you clarity and freedom!
The book is divided into three main parts:
Part I: Divorce & Remarriage in the Old Testament
Part II: Divorce & Remarriage in the New Testament
Part III: Divorce & Remarriage According to Rationality
129 pages, Paperback
Published January 1, 2024
42 people are currently reading
18 people want to read
About the author
Eitan Bar
46 books59 followersDr. Eitan Bar (born 1984, Tel Aviv) is a Bible scholar, author, and Israeli-Jewish follower of Jesus with multiple advanced degrees in Bible and theology. His unique background—living in Israel, being a native Hebrew speaker, and possessing advanced Christian education—provides a fresh and timely perspective on Christian beliefs and doctrines.
Dr. Bar co-founded ONE FOR ISRAEL Ministry, a Messianic Reformed Baptist non-profit and Bible college. He later left the organization in 2022 and deconstructed his Baptistic-Calvinistic beliefs, becoming an independent author of several books, including a few best-sellers (available on Amazon.com)
Eitan frequently lectures worldwide, primarily in Europe and the U.S., and his Hebrew-language videos, with over 25 million views, have made him a widely recognized figure in Israel for representing faith in Yeshua (Hebrew for Jesus).
Dr. Bar co-founded ONE FOR ISRAEL Ministry, a Messianic Reformed Baptist non-profit and Bible college. He later left the organization in 2022 and deconstructed his Baptistic-Calvinistic beliefs, becoming an independent author of several books, including a few best-sellers (available on Amazon.com)
Eitan frequently lectures worldwide, primarily in Europe and the U.S., and his Hebrew-language videos, with over 25 million views, have made him a widely recognized figure in Israel for representing faith in Yeshua (Hebrew for Jesus).
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Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews
February 1, 2024
Very thought provoking
As a strong believer in Jesus, when I got divorced I couldn't cope with the self-condemnation and I walked away from church for many years. My issue wasn't the divorce per se but the fact that I couldn't forgive my husband or myself. So with that background I was interested to see what this book had to say.
The author gives a wealth of background information that makes a lot of sense, it is obvious that he knows what he's talking about. His perception on words and their true meanings was both educational and enlightening.
It is a shame that translators have opted to change the true words of the original text. I know for instance that in the first Hebrew books it doesn't say 'on the first day' in Genesis it in fact says 'in the first period of time' so I know translation has a lot to answer for in our current beliefs.
This book focuses mostly on abusive relationships, and I agree, anyone who truly knows God's character would know that people shouldn't stay in an abusive relationship.
This is a deeply thought provoking book, for me I would have liked two chapters more, how to handle the guilt once you leave and how to forgive each other.
As a strong believer in Jesus, when I got divorced I couldn't cope with the self-condemnation and I walked away from church for many years. My issue wasn't the divorce per se but the fact that I couldn't forgive my husband or myself. So with that background I was interested to see what this book had to say.
The author gives a wealth of background information that makes a lot of sense, it is obvious that he knows what he's talking about. His perception on words and their true meanings was both educational and enlightening.
It is a shame that translators have opted to change the true words of the original text. I know for instance that in the first Hebrew books it doesn't say 'on the first day' in Genesis it in fact says 'in the first period of time' so I know translation has a lot to answer for in our current beliefs.
This book focuses mostly on abusive relationships, and I agree, anyone who truly knows God's character would know that people shouldn't stay in an abusive relationship.
This is a deeply thought provoking book, for me I would have liked two chapters more, how to handle the guilt once you leave and how to forgive each other.
May 4, 2025
Different from all other books on the subject!
I was led to this book when I saw it mentioned in the YouTube comments of a Christian video about how divorce is wrong in all circumstances including abuse. I have always found it impossible to reconcile the concept of a loving God with the strict requirements for marriage the Bible seems to have. This book was paradigm-changing for me. Everything makes sense now! Bar explains the difference in “putting away” and divorce, conflated in English Bibles, and the understandings and norms that Jesus and Paul were addressing when talking about marriage and divorce. I am still an Evangelical but I believe that the common understanding about divorce is erroneously strict. So much thanks to Mr. Bar for this simple but critical clarification. It will literally save lives.
I was led to this book when I saw it mentioned in the YouTube comments of a Christian video about how divorce is wrong in all circumstances including abuse. I have always found it impossible to reconcile the concept of a loving God with the strict requirements for marriage the Bible seems to have. This book was paradigm-changing for me. Everything makes sense now! Bar explains the difference in “putting away” and divorce, conflated in English Bibles, and the understandings and norms that Jesus and Paul were addressing when talking about marriage and divorce. I am still an Evangelical but I believe that the common understanding about divorce is erroneously strict. So much thanks to Mr. Bar for this simple but critical clarification. It will literally save lives.
October 9, 2024
This is a very quick and easy read on Divorce within Biblical context that highlights the tension between religious views on the matter. The book is concise and to the point. It offers a thorough, if not repetitive at times, analysis of possibilities and viewpoints on how and why divorce is appropriate. It makes several key but simple statements I believe will encourage anyone seeking guidance on divorce.
I had but two minor and I mean minor disagreements with the author but overall wholeheartedly agree with his linguistic, legal, spiritual and pragmatic approach to this subject sadly deemed delicate in, religious circles.
Read this book in good health and know this author's own experience with divorce is meant to encourage and support those in such delicate places.
Well done, Eitan!
I had but two minor and I mean minor disagreements with the author but overall wholeheartedly agree with his linguistic, legal, spiritual and pragmatic approach to this subject sadly deemed delicate in, religious circles.
Read this book in good health and know this author's own experience with divorce is meant to encourage and support those in such delicate places.
Well done, Eitan!
January 2, 2025
A Relief For Many
I wish I had this book when I went through my first two divorces. For years, I felt guilt about divorcing because of the fundamentalist views I was taught regarding divorce. It has taken a toll on my life over the years and I not only had to leave abusive relationships, but also suffered spiritual abuse by well meaning elders who asked me to go the extra mile, even though I knew it would lead to more abuse. I carried guilt of divorce in my heart for many, many years, but am realizing that I never had anything to feel guilty about.
Thank you, Dr. Bar for your wisdom and the truth about what God’s Word actually says regarding divorce and remarriage.
I wish I had this book when I went through my first two divorces. For years, I felt guilt about divorcing because of the fundamentalist views I was taught regarding divorce. It has taken a toll on my life over the years and I not only had to leave abusive relationships, but also suffered spiritual abuse by well meaning elders who asked me to go the extra mile, even though I knew it would lead to more abuse. I carried guilt of divorce in my heart for many, many years, but am realizing that I never had anything to feel guilty about.
Thank you, Dr. Bar for your wisdom and the truth about what God’s Word actually says regarding divorce and remarriage.
February 13, 2025
Good Insight On Truth About Divorce
The writer puts forth good points about divorce and remarriage from the Bible. The points are not easy, but are seen for the reality of the biblical viewpoint and not fundamentalist man made tradition from refusal or lazy thinking which has hurt so many families. Fundamentalism has often not been biblical because of wrong understanding from English and mistranslations. This is so true about divorce and remarriage. God becomes a harsh judge rather than being seen as love. Anyone who reads this book will hopefully consider and rethink their view on divorce and remarriage.
The writer puts forth good points about divorce and remarriage from the Bible. The points are not easy, but are seen for the reality of the biblical viewpoint and not fundamentalist man made tradition from refusal or lazy thinking which has hurt so many families. Fundamentalism has often not been biblical because of wrong understanding from English and mistranslations. This is so true about divorce and remarriage. God becomes a harsh judge rather than being seen as love. Anyone who reads this book will hopefully consider and rethink their view on divorce and remarriage.
October 19, 2024
Finally the Truth about what the Bible says regarding Divorce!
Dr. Bar has authored a much-needed book for the community of believers in the West. Regardless of your denominational background, his research is comprehensive and, most importantly, insightful. He sheds light on the topic of divorce, clarifying its true biblical purpose and meaning. I give it a 5-star rating and highly recommend it to any church leader. This is a book worth reading repeatedly, so leaders can better support and love their congregation with the love God intended.
Dr. Bar has authored a much-needed book for the community of believers in the West. Regardless of your denominational background, his research is comprehensive and, most importantly, insightful. He sheds light on the topic of divorce, clarifying its true biblical purpose and meaning. I give it a 5-star rating and highly recommend it to any church leader. This is a book worth reading repeatedly, so leaders can better support and love their congregation with the love God intended.
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April 18, 2025Take the guilt out of a Christian concerning divorce
This book gives understanding that the Church misinterpreted the word of God in the past. This book should be read by all Christian women in a marriage that is unhealthy or unhappy. The leaders of the Church should read this and support their congregation instead of making them feel judged as unworthy of love. Thank you Eitan Bar for your work on this book, you may have saved a life. You also restore many who felt guilt for leaving a marriage.
This book gives understanding that the Church misinterpreted the word of God in the past. This book should be read by all Christian women in a marriage that is unhealthy or unhappy. The leaders of the Church should read this and support their congregation instead of making them feel judged as unworthy of love. Thank you Eitan Bar for your work on this book, you may have saved a life. You also restore many who felt guilt for leaving a marriage.
October 17, 2024
Book on divirce
Some years ago I read a book on divorce written by a Baptist pastor. He introduced me to the mistranslations that Christians often use when condemning divorce. Dr. Bar's book is clear, concise, and full of compassion. He gives detailed information regarding the original intent of Moses and Jesus. I recommend this book for anyone in a troubled marriage, already divorced couples, and pastors.
Some years ago I read a book on divorce written by a Baptist pastor. He introduced me to the mistranslations that Christians often use when condemning divorce. Dr. Bar's book is clear, concise, and full of compassion. He gives detailed information regarding the original intent of Moses and Jesus. I recommend this book for anyone in a troubled marriage, already divorced couples, and pastors.
January 6, 2024
This will help you understand the morals of marriage and the bible
I rely on my faith, but sometimes you have to move on, from your marriage. For the longest time I wasn’t sure I could keep my faith and do what I needed to do. This book allowed me to balance these two things. This book will help you with that too.
I rely on my faith, but sometimes you have to move on, from your marriage. For the longest time I wasn’t sure I could keep my faith and do what I needed to do. This book allowed me to balance these two things. This book will help you with that too.
July 13, 2025
Well researched & written succinctly
I appreciate the insights of this book. It lifted a weight off my shoulders, being recently divorced after years of emotional abuse. If I had read this book earlier & not just listened to well-meaning advice of some church leaders, I would have ended the relationship earlier. However, I trust in God and that he can right any wrong. Thank you for sharing your insights!
I appreciate the insights of this book. It lifted a weight off my shoulders, being recently divorced after years of emotional abuse. If I had read this book earlier & not just listened to well-meaning advice of some church leaders, I would have ended the relationship earlier. However, I trust in God and that he can right any wrong. Thank you for sharing your insights!
Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews